Kill Me or Kiss Me?
by CaptainTightPants12
Summary: A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me' moments in Clois history, ranging from Season 4 to Season 10 and beyond.
1. Picking Lois

**Title:** Kill Me or Kiss Me?

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, One-sided Clana (but not bashing)

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you'd be watching it on TV, not posting it here.

**Summary:** Lana returns to Metropolis wanting to rekindle things with Clark.

**Author's Note:** This is an excerpt of a much larger story I've been working on for a while and I thought it would be appropriate as we wonder if Lana might return for the final season, though her interview comments don't give me hope she will.

All you really need to know here is that Clark and Lois are currently in a fight, but it doesn't have to do with Lana returning. Clark has also become Superman at this point in time, so I guess it probably wouldn't take place during Season 10 (I think that might be the final line of the show, Lois calling him Superman as he flies away in the suit for the first time), but lets pretend it is. Also, Jimmy Olson is present, but it's not Chloe's Jimmy. Like I said, it's part of a longer story that would see Jimmy's young brother step into the iconic role of Jimmy Olson.

* * *

Clark always liked the Daily Planet at night.

It afforded him the cover of listening for a breaking story when he was actually waiting for trouble. Before their fight, Clark and Lois would spend most of their nights here. It was so peaceful. That all of course, was before Jimmy Olson came to the Daily Planet.

"You just have to take Lois by the shoulders and kiss her 'til she can't stand, CK. Women love that kind of thing, I saw 'the Notebook' with James and Chloe one time, girls swoon over that kind of thing. Swoon, CK, swoon," explained Jimmy.

The young intern had only been working there for a few weeks, but he had seemingly latched onto his big brother's friend 'CK' and Clark really couldn't find it in himself to send him away. He reminded him of his old friend too much. Clark would normally just smile and throw in the occasional chuckle before letting him ramble on about whatever little thing crossed his mind.

That was his plan before he looked up past Jimmy's shoulder. That was before he saw Lana Lang.

Somehow, someway, she had cured herself of the radiation that drove them apart. She didn't hesitate to come back looking for Clark. In fact, the only reason she cared to find a cure was so she could come back and live her life along side him as a crime-fighting team again.

She had shown up at the Daily Planet looking for him a few days ago. He honestly hadn't thought she'd ever return, but there she was. Her hair was a little longer, but it was the same Lana that ran out of his loft just a couple years ago. It seemed like a lifetime ago. And despite explaining that he was engaged to Lois, she didn't seem waver in her desire to get back together.

"Uh, Jimmy, do you think you could give me a minute?"

Jimmy's eyebrows shot up into his hanging orange hair before he turning to see 'Ms. Lang' as he referred to her. He knew his buddy was going to have to let her down. Ms. Lang sure was pretty, but Jimmy learned pretty quick who Clark Kent belonged to.

Jimmy leaned up from his chair and patted Clark on the shoulder before leaving. Clark stood nervously, trying to find a way to begin this conversation.

"Hi."

Clark ran his hand through his hair nervously, but quickly patted in back down. Apart from his trademark glasses, he knew keeping his hair down and shaggy was the most important part of his disguise at the Planet. No need for that trouble again, Lois liked to scold when he forgot his glasses or put his hands on his hips or when that curl didn't quite stay up with the rest of his hair. Truth is, Lois just likes the inevitable banter.

"Lana-"

"Clark, I want our life back. We can have everything we always wanted. I can help you be the hero you want to be," said Lana.

Something about that statement sparked something within Clark. A memory. A memory from a part of his past that seemed like a lifetime ago.

'_She would never let me live this down if she heard this,_' Clark thought with a smile.

"That's the thing, Lana. You're right. I did want that," Clark began.

"Did?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"I wanted it, more than anything. Like a bike, a bike you couldn't quite afford. And you work and save up. But when that day comes and you finally crack open the piggybank to buy it, you realize you haven't been saving for a bike," he said.

Clark smirked, barley containing a chuckle.

"You've been saving for a Harley," he finished.

Lana looked at him confused. _What do bikes and motorcycles have to do with this?_

"I wanted that in a different life. Us? We never quite worked. When you looked at me, you were so focused on the secrets. You couldn't see me."

She shook her head.

"Clark, that's not true. And when you finally told me? We were so happy together."

"Even then, you saw the powers. You saw the Blur. Even now, you see me as Superman. I honestly can't blame you. That's the way everyone sees me, one way or the other. Superman and Clark Kent."

A tear streamed down Lana's cheek, this was not the way she wanted this to go.

"They either only see me as this red and blue streak across the sky, or they see me as the bumbling farm boy turned mild-mannered reporter."

Clark struggled to say the next part. He never wanted to hurt Lana. _But if I don't, she will never understand. She will never be able to completely move on._

"That's why Lois is the one for me."

Lana looks up.

"But she can't do the things that I can, Clark. You know that."

Clark shakes his head, a ghost of a smile on his face.

"That's what you don't understand. That's why we could never work." Clark looks down at the ground to compose himself while Lana silently cries. "Lois has always been able to see me. Even before she knew everything about me, she knew me better than anyone."

Clark walks over to her and takes Lana's hand.

"She is the only person who knows my secret, yet brushes it off like an endearing quirk and keeps on seeing me as Clark. I remember how my parents looked at me. They didn't see me as the boy who could lift the tractor over his head, they saw their son."

Brushing a tear off her cheek, he raises her chin to look him in the eye.

"Deep down, you know that you don't see me that way."

She closes her eyes, unwilling to accept the fact that she has always been attracted to him for the mystery. She came back to fight along side of him, when she thought of him, she never truly thought about just standing along side of him as Clark Kent.

"I'm not Superman because of my powers. I'm Superman, because Lois gives me a strength that the Yellow Sun never could. She makes me feel like I can fly. As long as I have her, I know that I can be the hero I need to be."

Lana wipes her tears away and nods. Trying to find the strength to respond. Trying to find the strength not to completely breakdown.

"I'm sorry that it has to be this way, but I can't give you what you're looking for."

"I understand. I have always loved you, Clark. It's hard to let go of the past, I always wanted to get it right with us. You really have become the hero that I always hoped that you would be. I hope that Lois knows how lucky she is."

From behind the former couple, a very tall and very conflicted brunette watched the scene.

"She does."

Lana looked over Clark's shoulder to see Lois Lane standing with her hands on her hips and an interesting look on her face. It looked almost like a cross between a glare and a smile. Clark didn't have to turn around. He knew that voice.

He knew that tone too. It was her '_kill him or kiss him?'_ tone as he liked to call it.

Lana said a quite goodbye, leaving Clark and Lois in the middle of a vacant newsroom that was rather ideal for either one of those scenarios.

"Interesting speech there, Smallville. Thinking about trading in your press badge in for a podium?"

"How long were you listening?" he ventured, bracing himself.

She smirked. He hoped she didn't hear the part-

"Enough to hear that what you really wanna buy, is a Harley."

Yep. She heard that part. And the smirk? Well, he knew it wasn't the last time he'd hear about it.

Clark walked slowly over towards her. He knew that smirk just as he knew her tone. He knew every little thing about her just like she knew every little thing about him. So, he also knew that smirk meant she was melting. And if he played his cards right, she was going to forgive him.

Not that she'd put it in those exact words. '_Let him live_' might be more appropriate.

"Well, I guess the only thing left to ask is," he paused dramatically as he stood closely to her.

Their eyes flickered to each other's lips before back to each other's eyes.

"Are you going to kill me, or kiss me?" he asked.

Lois Lane gave him her best stare. Most wouldn't know what she was thinking, but then again, most people weren't Clark Kent and couldn't hear her heart on the verge of beating out of her chest. He _really_ liked being an alien at times like this.

"Oh you know, the usual," she paused and leaned in. "Both."

As their lips met, he knew she wasn't lying.

She was going to kill him. Very, very slowly over the rest of their lives, and he was going to love every minute of it.

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, I threw in some call-backs to some of my favorite Clois moments. Some of you might recognize the 'Harley Speech' and the 'Endearing Quirk' comment as classic moments from 'Oracle' and 'Hydro' respectively.

While I will be the first to admit, I not-so-secretly plead for Clark to be just a few seconds later every time Lana's life was on the line from Season 4 on in hopes of more Lois Lane in his life and on the screen, I think they do need to bring back Lana and tie up that storyline in a nice way. Her running away to keep from hurting him is hardly the way to end things definitively. Even in 'Homecoming', Lois looked a little worried. It'd be nice to have a 'I pick Lois' moment without having to bash Lana, it's not her fault she isn't as awesome as Lois Lane. But like I said above, doesn't sound like Kristin Kreuk wants to come back.

Oh well, I think I can live with more Erica Durance on my TV. Liked it? Write a review. Hated it? Flame on, won't hurt my feelings. Just say something.


	2. The Original Moment

**Review Comments:** So because of the surprisingly positive feedback, I have decided to turn this into a running thing. This next one will be what I call the 'Original Moment' of "Kill me or Kiss me", and the following ones will be done from the perspective of each of the main characters that we've seen on the show that I can come up with a cute little bit for and tie into our little theme here.

**_Clois16_** - Thank you so much, my first review! Haha, I'm happy you liked it.

**_ann_** - Love the review as well, haha.

**_devary_** - I desperately avoided liking the Lana storyline for the first two seasons, warmed up in the third season, but totally wanted her to die once season for began.

**_Sunsprite Rose_** - The Harley Scene for me, is one of the first (if not the first) scenes where they realize they have something going on between them even if they wouldn't admit it at the time. We'll see about the longer story, it's pretty long.

**_jade2nightwing_** - From what I hear, Tom Welling is doing everything he can to get both Kristin Kreuk and Michael Rosenbaum back for Season 10, and I have to think her coming back would be that moment, but I'm not holding my breath.

**_Ina100years_** - Thank you very much. Everyone knows you can't get anything past Lois Lane, except of course the fact that Clark Kent is an Alien for about five seasons, haha.

**_sunset_** - I liked the title myself, especially since this will now be recurring. I love call-backs as well, one of my favorite things to read from FanFiction is when we get to have a little reference or call-back that puts us right back with the show. Your review in particular is what has inspired this recurring story idea, so hope you like it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #2, the Original Moment

**Author's Note:** For me, this particular moment competes with the moment from Façade (which we'll see in the Chloe chapter I think) as the my favorite Clois moment before they actually started to legitimately realize their growing attraction to each other.

If you don't recognize the scene, it's from the end of 'Devoted' in Season 4.

* * *

Clark stood near the entrance of the room Lex had used to investigate into Clark's life. He almost didn't come. He knew Lex well enough by now to know that Lex didn't do much if didn't benefit himself in some way. It was true, Lex did have a darkness inside of him. Clark knew that. But Clark also knew that on some level, we all do. And maybe, just maybe, their friendship could be a bright fixture in Lex's life, bright enough to shine over that darkness.

"In the spirit of friendship, I was wondering if you could help me with a problem?" he asked.

"Absolutely, what is it?" Lex replied.

"Well, it's a who."

Lex gave Clark a look, almost as if to ask, '_what have you gotten yourself into this time?_'

With a smile, Clark explained, "Lois Lane."

"What do you need?"

Clark paced around Lex, trying to find the words to explain. If it didn't come out right, it was going to sound like he wanted Lex to bribe the Dean to let in the annoying presence that had taken over his room.

"She is having trouble getting accepted at Met-U, I thought maybe with your connections, you could help her?"

Smirking, Lex had to point of the obvious. "Of course, but do you really want to send her away, Clark?"

Clark seemed almost oblivious to what Lex was implying. "Why wouldn't I? She's terrible."

"She is awful pretty, Clark."

"Yeah, pretty annoying."

With a laugh, Lex clapped his new/old friend on the shoulder. "Let me make a few calls, it shouldn't be a problem. I'm glad to have you back, Clark, I'm getting awful rusty at pool. Care to help a friend out?"

With a laugh, they made their way out of the room. Lex turned the light off, and Clark hoped he was turning it off for good.

The next day, Clark managed to win his first game as starting quarter back in the final minutes. Lois was about to get in her car after the team's small celebration when her phone rang. Checking the Caller-ID to see it was the Met-U applications office, she quickly answered.

"Hello?...Yes...Are you serious? You're not kidding me, right?...Yes!" She nearly jumped in the air in victory. She was leaving Cornfield High and going back to the big city. Finally some good news, but then, she couldn't help but wonder what changed their firm answer the previous 27 times she called.

"Wait, what? Mr. Luthor? As in, Lex Luthor?" _Why would Lex Luth..._

A realization came over her. There was only person who knew Lex Luthor well enough to ask a favor, and yet want to help her. And to think she was _this _close to declaring that plaid wearing farm-boy all figured out. Turning on her heel, she marched back towards the field to catch Clark.

She reached the field just in time to see Clark kissing Chloe on the cheek. She was pretty certain that Clark wasn't playing games with her little cousin, but she wasn't known to be all that rational either. She sped up a little to catch up with him.

"If you break her heart, I'll come back and I'll break your legs," she surprised him from behind as he walked.

Trying to play it cool, Clark kept a neutral face. "What do you mean, 'come back'?"

"Apparently the Dean got a call from a very prominent benefactor with the initials L.L.? They did the white-man power dance and shazam, I'm officially a freshman," Lois quipped. She looked at Clark, trying to catch his face.

"Wow, that's great." He had no plan of taking credit for it.

"Don't pretend you had nothing to do with it, why would Lex call out of the blue on my behalf?" she questioned.

"Look the important thing is, you got in, and you're leaving."

He expected a quick comeback but was met with silence. He turned back to her. Her face was steely, not giving him a reaction.

'_Why isn't she..._'

"Because that's what you wanted, right?" he asked, he couldn't have been able to explain why he was so nervous.

This time she didn't hesitate. "Yeah, yeah, don't get all broken up about it. You know, if I could describe my time here in one word, it would be 'weird'. I look forward to the relative normalcy of the big city."

Clark looked down, for some reason, he had an odd feeling in the very pit of his stomach. '_What is going on with me?_'

Lois saw a glimmer of something on his face, and for some reason, she couldn't help herself from reassuring him.

"But don't worry, I'll visit," she said.

Clark was thrown by the look on her face and the glint her eyes. Lois Lane was unlike anyone he had ever met. Her smirk, her tone, the way her eyes had that mischievous spark in them. She brought out this side of him that he didn't even know existed.

'_I don't know if she is going to kill me or kiss me_' he thought. '_And why don't I seem to care one way or the other? It's Lois of all people._'

"Is that a promise or a threat?" he asked.

There it was again. She had that look. And like clockwork, there was that feeling inside of Clark. That feeling that made him feel free, bringing that uncharacteristic smirk to his face and that fire deep inside of himself wanting challenge whatever she would have to say.

After a moment of hesitation, almost as if she didn't know what to say either, she punched his arm and smiled.

"See you around...Smallville."

Watching her walk away, he found himself almost regretting his decision to help her get into Met-U. _Almost_, because you know, it's not like Clark Kent has a thing for girls who were bossy. And stuck up. And rude. And gorgeous. _Wait, what?_

**

* * *

Author's Note: **What did you guys think? Bit of a change of pace, what with it being an actual scene from the show. I was thinking about having some of the future chapters being a combination of the two. I think it might be fun if we explore a few actual 'is she going to kill me or kiss me' moments from the show in addition to some pure original scenes. Get a nice mix in of the two going, you know?

Obviously we'll have Chloe, Lana, Lex, the Kents (one each I think), and maybe a Lionel Luthor (literally did a happy dance during 'Luthor', I don't know what it is, I love this character) centric chapter. I want to definitely do a Kara one, an Oliver Queen one, and maybe a Justice League one that will hit a bunch of them at once. I think it'd be fun to do some characters that haven't shown up quite yet too like Bruce Wayne, Jimmy Olson (a more centric version of the one I introduced in Chapter 1), and Daily Planet Perry White. Any other ideas?

You know the drill from here. Little blue letters, little yellow speech bubble, dead center, tell me whatcha thought!


	3. The Kents

**Review Comments: **

_**TaraLittle**_ - You are reviewing now, that's what matters, haha. Hopefully I can keep it up, but I will warn you, not all of these little chapters will be done from within one of their POV's. We have to show some love to our other characters, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think having Lois is his life has made him confident and decisive. Seeing the way he interacts with people now, I can't help but feel like _this_ is the Clark Kent who has the confidence and the strength to make that step towards becoming Superman. It was killing me to see him become that guy again from 'Bride' until 'Infamous', but to steal Harvey Dent's line, "the night is darkest right before the dawn." He ultimately became the man we wanted to see him become, which at it's core, has been the whole point of Smallville.

As for Chapter 2, I'm glad you liked it. I recently took a stroll down memory lane and was watching the show from the beginning again, and maybe it's a wishful thinking type of thing, but little moments sparked the ideas for that whole exchange. Her expression really is almost a '_he wants me to leave?_' kind of thing, and his face when she talks about leaving, it really is almost as if he doesn't really want her to.

I think Lois is right in Infamous. For a guy with X-Ray vision, Clark can be pretty blind. And she's a bit too stubborn to admit it, but having watched 'Facade' again recently for Chapter 4's little backstory, that moment when she says '_so you have been checking me out?_' was a little too easy for it to have been entirely a tease. I think deep down, in a place they aren't willing to admit, they both know there is something there.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Thanks, hopefully this one is just as enjoyable.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #3, Jonathan Kent

**Author's Note:** As much as we all miss seeing Shelby more often on the show, who am I to do it here? Set sometime during Season 4.

* * *

"Clark!"

The youngest member of the Kent family ran out of the barn, sprinting towards the house. He had to dial back his super-speed, Lois was over and the last thing he needed was for her to see him using his powers. They had enough close calls already and she was like a pitbull with a pant-leg sometimes. Bursting through the back door and into the house, Clark wasn't sure what to expect when he got inside.

"Mom, Dad, what's wrong?"

To his surprise, Martha was simply working on dinner, casting a small smile of pity to Clark. Lois had her nose pinched at the table trying to study, and his father stood at the counter with a pained look on his face. Shelby found himself laying in the middle of the kitchen looking pretty filthy.

"Son, when we let you keep the dog, we expected you to take care of it," his father told him.

"But, huh?...What's wrong with him?"

Looking from Martha to Lois, Jonathan didn't seem to know how to explain the problem at hand. He tipped his head back and forth, trying to use his hands to explain. Lois finally let out a large sigh and closed her book with a thud.

"Your dog smells even worse than you do, Smallville," she quipped.

Martha let out a laugh, quickly covering her mouth and blushing. Jonathan simply grimaced.

"What do you mean? Shelby doesn't smell that bad," Clark defended.

Even Shelby didn't want to take Clark's side, letting out a muffled bark at his comment.

"Clark, honey, maybe you should give him a bath in the barn?" offered Martha.

"Yeah Farmboy, you haven't been entertaining any ladies up there lately anyways. The wet dog smell won't matter much," Lois chimed in.

Clark's face twisted into an evil smirk before turning around to face Lois. For a moment, she almost seemed timid, but then she put on her brave face and smirked right back at him with a hand on her hip. "What are you smiling at?"

"Well Lois, maybe you ought to come help me if you feel so strongly about it," Clark suggested.

"Allergic," she said with a smirk.

"We could use the allergy shampoo so that you don't have to sneeze so much when you come over, we would all just be so heart broken if it were to keep you from visiting" Clark teased. "And well, you did hit him with your car."

If it got his son to wash the dog, he was willing to help him out with just Lois this once. "It would really be a help, Lois," Jonathan told her. "Shelby is quite the handful when he wants to be, and Clark could use the help if you don't mind?"

Lois and Martha looked at the Kent Men, slack jawed and surprised. Clark looked at his father with a wide grin, nodding to his father in thanks.

"Wel...wel...Well, if you think so, Mr. Kent" she said.

Jonathan nods with a smile. "Thank you, Lois. Clark, let's get the bath together in the barn."

Watching Lois and Clark from the porch, Jonathan and Martha Kent were in awe. Clark was chasing Lois with the hose, they were both laughing with Lois throwing in the occasional insult regarding his farmboy ways or his preference for plaid. Clark had finally caught her, holding her around her waist and lifting her into the air. Shelby barked with glee that they had forgotten all about his bath, chasing the pair around.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" questioned Martha.

Jonathan chuckled.

"That she's going to kill him?"

Martha looked up at him in surprise, giving him a soft slap on the shoulder.

"What? No! She's going to end up kissing him! Look at those two, Jonathan. They're flirting!"

Jonathan looked from his wife to the duo in the barn, a look of disbelief on his face.

"Honey, I know what a woman looks like right before she goes crazy, she's going to kill him," he replied.

Martha's eyebrows shot up, she blinked several times before turning to her husband entirely.

"You know what a woman looks like right before she goes crazy? Are you implying you have some sort expertise in this area, dear?"

Mouth agape, Jonathan tried to speak but couldn't. Martha huffed and walked back into the house, leaving Mr. Kent alone on the porch. He looked out to see Lois and Clark still in the midst of their water fight with no sign of the war coming to an end.

"Clark! Chores!" he shouted. Turning back towards the house, Jonathan went to smooth things over with Mrs. Kent.

"Sweetie, that's not what I meant..." he began.

**

* * *

Author's Note: **I like to think Clark putting his foot in mouth is a trait learned from his adopted father, don't you? Mrs. Kent is pretty with it, so I've always kind of fancied them as a less intense version of Clark and Lois when they were young. The one character I miss the most that isn't on the show anymore, is Jonathan Kent. I lit up with joy when I saw his little scene at the end of the Season Premiere. John Schneider did a fantastic job.

I'll be doing the 'Chloe' chapter next, which will take place during Façade, it's a bit angsty but I'm anxious to hear what you think about it. I'm curious what you guys think about the length of my chapters, the last one was considerably smaller than the first chapter, especially when you consider a large chunk of it was going to replying to reviews. Do you guys prefer long or short or mix it up?

With 'Chloe' being Chapter 4, how about you guys vote on who you'd like for Chapter 5? Majority Rules!


	4. Chloe

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El **_- Unless we get some more votes, I think it will be the League. I have a little funny one for the League, so it should be fun. Either way, the League will be very soon, so look out for it.

_**katlynne**_ - I wrote a 'Martha' chapter that featured some Jonathan just for you. We'll see if someone tips the vote.

_**TaraLittle**_ - Thanks, I love me some good ole the Kent fun. haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I hadn't thought about it like that, I guess I'll enjoy the wet Lois? haha. Shelby definitely becomes 'their' dog, she just isn't willing to admit it yet. A recurring theme with Lois. I hadn't thought about the General and Lucy, that could be a lot of fun. Let me see what I can come up with.

_**Hot-chocolate329** _- You are reviewing now, that's what counts! haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Like Clark, I think Jonathan will always find a way to get out of it, haha.

**_Meg_ - **As much as I agree that it's very Lois, Clark can have his moments too, haha, keep reading to see! haha.

_**sunset**_ - A story is only as good as it's audience, so of course I love to respond! haha, you took the time to comment, I should take the time to give you a response, even if it's just a few sentences. Writing is certainly helping me cope with the break as well, I feel like something is missing in my week now. I love the looks as well, especially when it comes to Clois, they aren't the best talkers, so they usually say it all with their looks and actions.

It is fun, isn't it? I love the original stories and the original scenes, but there is something special about looking back knowing what we know now. All the looks, all the teases, all the little things seem to mean so much more now. Of course, part of that is us wanting to see it, but what's wrong with that? haha. I know how being busy goes, luckily I have this lull in my spare-time lately with Christmas Break and all, so I'm bulking up on chapters in the ole Document Manager so that I don't get behind, if anything, I'm struggling with not posting quicker! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, shades of Chlark, shades of Chimmy, shades of Chlollie, shades of Chloe/Bruce

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #4, Chloe Sullivan

**Author's Note:** I never know what to expect long-term for Chloe. Obviously, she's currently (kinda) with Oliver on the show, but he's with Dinah Lance (aka Black Canary) in the comics. She was with Jimmy, and is with Jimmy in the recent comic books. I've read a lot of Chloe in Gotham with Bruce Wayne fics, which is a very interesting idea I admit. But then you have to think about Bruce, whom is with like everybody (playa).

So in order to beef up this chapter, I added some Chloe future background stuff. And in the end, I'm hoping that you can believe she's with either Oliver or Bruce depending on what you want you personally prefer. Me? I personally like Bruce ending up with Diana Prince (aka Wonder Woman), which I kind of have in one of my other future chapters, so I think I would put Chloe with Oliver. Not a big Black Canary fan, but that's just me.

I'm featuring a look-back into Season 4's 'Façade', with the rest of the story taking place sometime in the future, probably after Season 10.

* * *

Gotham.

It wasn't a pretty city. Chloe recalled how Clark hated visiting Bruce here, he hates Gotham. '_A nightmare made out of metal and stone_' as he had once described it. It didn't have the upbeat attitude that Metropolis had. I guess that's why Bruce had to do things the way he did them, then again, he also had to be that way because he couldn't just walk up an alley like Clark could. Even with kevlar you'd be pushing your luck.

But it was home. For now. The journalist itch came back, and when the Gotham Gazette called, she left Metropolis. Tess offered her a position at the Daily Planet and both Bruce and Ollie offered to pull strings anywhere she wanted, but the Gazette called her because they wanted _her_. She choose Gotham because they wanted her based on her writing merits and nothing else. That meant something to her. Oliver had helped her with the apartment.

He had told her, "_I dont want you to end up in a bad part of town." _She was fairly certain Bruce had helped him pick it.

She missed her family and friends. Little Jimmy, as she liked to call him, just started his 'real job' at the Daily Planet. He had been an intern for so long it seemed, and now he was a full-fledged photographer. He usually worked with Clark and Lois, she knew that they liked to hoard him because he reminded them of her late husband. That life seemed like such a long time ago. She missed them the most, they were her real family after all.

"_It'll just be for a while, I have to find myself. I'm not Watchtower anymore, I have to figure out who Chloe Sullivan is again,_" she told Lois.

That was the other reason she couldn't go back to the Daily Planet. She loved her cousin more than anything, but she couldn't be in her shadow. Lois wasn't just the top reporter at the Daily Planet, she was one of the top reporters in the world. At the Planet, she'd always be Lois Lane's baby cousin.

She'd only admitted it to Oliver once, but she still held a bit of jealously over the way Lois' life turned out. She was the star reporter for the newspaper that Chloe went to bed at night dreaming about when she was in High School. She was here, she was there, she was Lois Lane. Everyone knew who she was and everyone loved her. Meanwhile Chloe went missing for months after Oliver was taken by Flagg, and it seemed like no one had even noticed.

And then there was Clark.

Under Lois' wing, he had gone from handsome farm boy to mild-mannered reporter. His name wasn't as well known, but he liked it that way. When he wasn't getting the story _with_ Lois, he _was_ her story as Superman. As much as she had put her feelings for Clark behind her and moved on, we never entirely move on and there was no doubt if anything, that was where Chloe had felt the most jealously towards her cousin.

Clark opened up to Lois completely. He gave her all his quotes, all his headlines. She named him for pete's sake. Lois replaced her as Clark's best friend and as the person he trusted most. He wasn't the same Clark anymore, not that it was a bad thing. He just wasn't _her _Clark anymore. He had grown up, matured, he was Superman now. He was Lois' Clark. Somehow, Chloe had known all along that it was going to end up this way.

It seemed like yesterday that she saw 'the Lois and Clark Sparkaplooza Fireworks Show' for the first time.

_Clark, the rookie quarterback, was sitting over the dunk tank with a smirk on his face. Chloe had only seen him so confident and bold once before, and that was when he was on Red-K. Lois seemed to bring that side out of him, they were taunting each other back and forth as Lois tried to dunk him._

_"Come on Lois, didn't those guys on the base teach you anything?" he asked._

_Chloe looked to Lois with a frown. She couldn't believe that Clark would be so bold, but to her surprise, Lois just smirked back._

_"Wouldn't you like to know?"_

_Eyebrows hidden in her bangs, Chloe watched on in surprise. Clark gestured to the target confidently._

_"Doesn't matter, because you are going down" she quipped._

_"That'll be the day," he teased._

_The crowd chanted behind them as Lois reached back for another shot. To Clark's surprise, Lois wasn't bluffing. She nailed the target to send him into the tank, causing the crowd to erupt behind them. Lois threw her arms into the air, cheering and bowing before running over to Clark. As Lois shook his hair, Chloe couldn't help but take in the look on Clark's face. Either he was going to jump out of the tank and strangle her, or he might kiss her senseless._

_Before he could react, Lois was running back and Clark was trying his best to splash her. Chloe looked on to see them catch each other's eyes, and for a quick moment, it seemed like the two were oblivious to everyone and everything surrounding them. In that moment, it was just them._

_Looking between them and sensing the electricity these two shared, Chloe couldn't help but let her face fall. Chloe knew that Clark was over her. She believed that deep down, he was in love with Lana Lang. But those feelings don't just disappear. And in that moment, Chloe felt her heart break. She had thought for so long that Clark could only have eyes for Lana, but in that moment, his whole world appeared to be Lois Lane._

_When the moment ended, Chloe put on her best brave face. She refused to be _that_ girl._

It took years for all those looks, all that banter, all those feelings to turn into something real. Something Chloe had always wanted with Clark, something she had found in varying degrees with Oliver, Jimmy, and Bruce. They were all the loves of her life. A part of her knew she'd always think of Clark that way, but right now they were friends, and she was honestly ok with that. He was still her best friend, even if she wasn't his.

In some ways, she was happy about the way things turned out. If the Lana vs. Lois thing proved anything, it was that if you tried to push Clark, you seemed to find yourself on the express train out of his life. Especially once Lois came along. Even after they sorted things out, Lana and Clark rarely spoke. And after watching Clark try for years to fly, you had to believe him when he said Lois was the inspiration that gave him the ability to defy gravity and finally become Superman, the world's greatest hero.

The world needed Superman. And Chloe needed Superman, even if he wasn't _her_ Superman.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Looks like Lois isn't the only one that might kiss or strange someone, maybe even both.

Soooooo, that was pretty angsty, huh? I prefer more of a happy vibe and most of the chapters will have that, but I don't know, I think Chloe has been pretty angsty for the most part these last few seasons. Maybe it's just me, but lately it seems like there is a part of her that really is jealous of the life that Lois and Clark have ended up with. Her few upswings have been becoming Watchtower and the time she's spent with Oliver I think.

I put the 'Oliver set me up here' line to counter-act the 'living in Gotham' part, hopefully that'll be enough to let you pick her partner. I also put the 'loves of her life' out of chronological order to avoid a 'you put Bruce last, so i figured Bruce was the present one'. I dunno, you decide.

I haven't decided who is next, we have one vote for 'the League', one vote for 'something including Jonathan Kent', and a vote for 'the General and Lucy'. How about I let you guys continue to vote? You can do that via review! Have fun!


	5. League

**Review Comments:**

_**sunset**_ - I've included the Clois pet in another scene I hope you guys will enjoy, it's a bit of a surprise though, stick around for it. I think if it meant getting her with the hose like that, neither of them would even think about what they were doing, they would just do it, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks, your vote tipped us to League. But Martha is coming in Chapter 7, and oddly, it's very much like you described. You haven't hacked my account have you? haha. We have some Oliver in this one, but he'll have his own Chapter and he'll be present in a couple other ones. Enjoy!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Oliver/Dinah, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #5, the Justice League

**Author's Note:** I didn't intend to put any relationship stuff for anyone other than Lois and Clark, but I've been toying around with a Wonder Woman idea and recently saw the animated exchange (google 'Batman dissed Wonder Woman') between Bruce and Diana that I thought was funny and wanted to put it in here. And well, once I did that, I thought I might as well put in Ollie and Dinah to make some more funny moments.

This is set sometime after Season 10 when Clark is Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman have become part of the Justice League, and there have been enough 'Lois and the League' moments to generate their fear of her, haha.

* * *

The Justice League gathered around Clark's hospital room. They weren't especially worried. It was Clark after all. He had a habit of being, well, _super_. He just had that little nagging weakness of certain rocks, and well, that kind of came into play earlier.

Clark kind of had ingested some blue kryptonite, and then got smashed through a wall of two. J'onn had taken the bulk of the impact, but Clark was still banged up enough that they decided they needed to get checked out at the hospital.

As Emil Hamilton left the room, they swarmed.

"Is he going to be ok?" asked Diana, her hand firmly gripping Bruce's, an action he was going to have to have a long talk with her about later. '_Just because Oliver does it, doesn't mean the rest of us should date within the team_,' he thought.

He could practically hear Alfred laughing in the back of his head, '_poppycock._' It was a losing battle after all.

Emil nodded, "He has a few injuries I'd be concerned about if it wasn't Clark, but he is fine right now. And once the kryptonite is out of his system, he'll be all healed up and back to doing what he does best."

There was a collective sigh of relief as Emil walked away towards another patient.

"Good, now I'm getting out of here before-" began Bart, but with a ding, everyone tensed up and moved to form a passage way to the room's doorway.

Suddenly, the floor and ceiling were very interesting, because not one member of the League was willing to look at the furious reporter from the Daily Planet as she walked past. She had a look of rage as she stomped, but stopped short of the door.

In a swift motion, Lois reached both arms out to her sides. Gripping each of Oliver and Bruce's jackets and pulling them close to her.

'_Where is Diana's thunder grip when I need it?' _Bruce thought to himself. Oliver simply looked terrified. He had known Lois long enough to know what was coming next. He glanced over to Dinah for help, but she shook her head furiously.

"Which one wants to explain while the other one dies first?" she asked.

For a woman without any powers or gadgets, Lois managed to scare everyone in the League when she was angry. AC coughed quietly, causing her to look back at her ex-boyfriend with a snarl.

"It was an accident, Lois. We didn't know-"

Lois glared. "Obviously, Fishstick. I'm going to let your wife deal with you, I already made the call."

All AC could do was gulp. Lois huffed and pushed Ollie and Bruce aside. She walked into the room and began to yell at Clark for being so stupid.

"Dude, why didn't you stop her? You're like, a tank. She's gunna to kill him. You know how she gets when he gets hurt," Bart asked J'onn.

The Martian gave him a quizzical look. "I am Mars' sole survivor…there's a reason for that. I'm smart enough to know superpowers can't protect you from Lois Lane." With this, J'onn makes his exit while Bart rolled his eyes.

Suddenly, the yelling suddenly stops. They each exchange looks, not knowing what that could mean. _She wouldn't actually…would she?_

Bruce looked to Oliver, nodding his head to towards the door which caused Oliver to shake his head frantically.

"Do it," said Bruce.

"You do it," said Oliver.

"I make more money than you do," countered Bruce. It was a soft spot for Ollie because Jo'an frequently commented on '_Uncle Bruce's toys_'.

Oliver makes an angry face. "Why do you always go there? All that means is that you can handle the medical bills when she rips your head off."

Bruce pales.

"Bart, look real quick," he orders.

"No can do," quipped Bart, holding his hands up.

"Diana?" offered Oliver. Her look said enough that he knew her answer.

Before they could continue to bicker and argue, something flung up against the glass and got caught in the blinds. They stared and frowned at the object.

"Is that a…" started Dinah.

It was a scarlet bra, caught and folded between the blinds.

A loud moan sounded that none of them needed super-hearing to catch, causing them all to backed away from the room.

"I guess she isn't going to kill him," offered Bart with a smile.

The girls snorted, in a very lady-like manner of course.

"Yet," quipped Diana. "Come on Dinah, let's get some coffee and talk about how our men…" she shot Bruce and Oliver a glare, "…are cowards."

Diana and Dinah left towards the cafeteria, Bart exclaimed something about food and jets off behind them, AC's phone rings and pales when he sees 'Mera' on his Caller-ID. "Uh, I gotta take this, bros," he said before walking away.

This left Bruce and Oliver to shift uncomfortably and shoot each other a couple awkward glances before Oliver finally decided to speak up.

"So…you, uh…any new gadgets?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, in this one we had the Justice League consisting of Superman (Clark), Batman (Bruce), Wonder Woman (Diana), Green Arrow (Oliver), the Flash (Bart), Martian Manhunter (J'onn), Aquaman (AC), and Black Canary (Dinah). Just in case you were wondering who was who, I didn't want to put like "aka so and so", seemed...bulky that way. I thought this was a nice way of saying 'kill him or kiss him' without actually putting it in words.

Also, the Jo'an line was a call-out to the brilliant mygyps17 and the wonderful 'You Make Daddy Sick' story. Love that story, and when I wrote that line about Bruce making more money, I couldn't help but throw in that line. Hopefully some people got it.

There were a couple call-backs in this one. Bruce's thought about dating in the League came from that video I put in the other note, Fishstick was from 'Justice', the sole survivor line that J'onn gives is a classic Martian Manhunter line (well, the first part, haha), AC always says 'bro' on the show, and I wanted the last line to be reminiscent of that scene in 'Escape' when Ollie and Clark are left alone, haha.

I have the next EIGHT chapters planned out if you'll believe it, and I don't think you'll see some of them coming, haha. Since I have a stockpile going here, I'm thinking I'll post one a day at roughly 12 PM my time, 4 PM eastern time. So make sure to check back.

Chapter 6 will be 'Little Jimmy', and then 'Martha' after that with a little Jonathan goodness in it. Hope you guys liked this one!


	6. Little Jimmy

**Review Comments:**

_**TaraLittle**_ - Haha, she is quite scary when she is angry.

_**sunset**_ - I think she'll resent them a bit too, but I think she'll move past it. It'll just be one of those things lurking in the back of her mind whenever she sees them together, which is why I think moving to a new city where she can make a new life for herself seems appealing. I do tend to lean towards Bruce and Diana in this one, but I'll say this, he won't always be leaning towards Diana and Oliver won't always be with Dinah or even leaning towards her.

I had doubts about a chapter where Clark doesn't have a line, not even within a flash back, but I thought that it'd be a nice change of pace. I"ll throw you a little spoiler, they don't even APPEAR in a chapter I have up ahead and yet I make an allusion to their 'kill me or kiss me' ways. I will see if mygyps17 wants to write a Jo'An chapter, I certainly would love it! It's one of my favorite stories! There is a Shelby chapter ahead, I hadn't thought of an Emil chapter until just now, and I know exactly what it will be now that I've thought about it for a second, it's such an obvious one! haha, can't wait to write it.

_**echo13**_ - I'm not familiar with the DI forum, but sounds like an interesting option to spread the 'Clois' word.

_**Ghostfile**_ - One thing that I'll be doing for folks like you that do have a preference, is that there will be some different looks. I tried to set up the Chloe Chapter as both Bruce and Oliver, there will be moments where she is with Oliver and she is with Bruce, and I'm mulling over another potential pairing for her. I think we'll see this with Bruce and Diana, Selina, and Chloe and I hope to do equal parts Chloe and Dinah for Oliver. Not everyone can find their soul-mate like Clark and Lois have, so I think there is a bit of a realism to see couples change. The important thing is they enjoyed their time with each of them, which I tried to show in 'Chloe'.

Oliver will most definitely be getting a chapter, I'm actually trying to choose between two ideas for him at the moment. I'll probably have to do both, I like how both ideas have turned out, so you will get your Oliver-fix. Haha, no worries. He's a personal favorite of mine.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think you hit the nail on the head: Lois is living Chloe's dream. All the heart and good feelings in the world can't change that. I love Chloe to death, and I don't think it's vindictive, but she has to be jealous of it all. I too was sad when they killed of Jimmy, hopefully you can still enjoy this chapter below all the same though, haha. I agree with you about Clark getting the better end of the deal when Lois was yelling at him, I like to think he feels the same way, haha. I enjoy J'onn J'onzz so much in the comics, I'm glad he's on the show, I hope I can get him in a couple more chapters!

**_jade2nightwing_** - Might Bruce and Ollie's biggest challenge be surviving the wrath of Lois Lane? Haha. I really need to do a chapter where they argue over who has to call Lois when something happens with Clark, now that might be some comedy gold. haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mention of Chimmy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #6, James Bartholomew Olson aka 'Little Jimmy'

**Author's Note: **This one, is not about the Jimmy Olson that Chloe was married to, aka Henry james Olsen. This is about his younger brother, James Bartholomew Olson, who works alongside Lois and Clark when Clark becomes Superman. I introduced him in Chapter 1, 'Picking Lois', and referenced him as 'Little Jimmy' in Chapter 4 'Chloe.

Lois and Clark look at this Jimmy almost like a little brother and take him under their wing because he reminds them of 'Big Jimmy'.

He is an important part of the Superman mythos, so I have to imagine the little brother we saw in 'Doomsday' will become _the_ Jimmy from the comics, so I think it's only fair that he be included here. We also hear Lois tell 'Olsen' to catch 'every pixel' of Superman in Clark's Dream from 'Salvation' and a Jimmy Olson is credited for a photograph on the cover of the Daily Planet in the future from 'Homecoming'. So, yeah, he's totally going to become _the_ Jimmy Olson.

But when _this_ Jimmy talks about 'Henry', he is talking about the Jimmy Olson we know and love that married the lovely Chloe Sullivan. It feels weird to call him Henry, but I can't really think of what else he might call his brother since he himself becomes _the_ Jimmy.

* * *

He had planned all week, ever since Lois had sent him to go get her post-lunch, pre-dinner, after coffee snack and saw her calendar. How did this never occur to him? Did he think she fell out of the sky? This kind of thing had to happen, she was a human being after all.

'_Albeit, a scary one sometimes_' he thought.

CK was all too happy to help of course. Jimmy didn't know if it was the prospect of doing something special for Lois, or maybe it was because she might hurl herself at him and choke him out in the middle of the Daily Planet. Clark was kind weird like that. He liked ruffling her feathers.

Now, Jimmy was hardly a master planner. He had to call Chloe and ask her advice. Which was, you know, _don't_. She told him that Lois was going to be beyond furious and could kill someone, but Henry didn't own the nickname, he was a little 'Jimmy the Infuriator' in his own right too.

Besides, it was Lois. They were friends. He had to do something like this for her. It's in the rulebook for friends.

Clark got the 'ok' from Perry to set up in the break room, the only problem was how to get Lois to show up. If she had any idea what was going to happen, she was going to disappear quicker than the Flash. Luckily as Clark and Jimmy walked down the hall, CK explained the plan.

"I'll just tell her that I have something in the break-"

He cut off, and Jimmy looked around to see why. Heading their way was Perry's nephew, Richard. For some reason, Clark didn't seem to like him. Which was a lot weirder than it sounded, because Clark liked everybody. CK was the nicest guy that Jimmy had ever met. He had seen Richard talking to Lois a few times in his time at the Planet, but Clark never seemed to be the jealous type. He couldn't help but wonder.

"What is your problem with Mr. Richard anyways?" questioned Jimmy. "He must've done something bad to piss _you_ off."

Clark stood a little straighter and fiddled with his tie a little bit. "I don't have a problem with Richard, Jimmy."

Jimmy huffed.

"He must've hit on Lois, huh?"

Clark looked at Jimmy with a frown. "Maybe in an alternate universe."

The intern let out a chuckle at his buddy as they continued down the hall.

Later that night, Clark found Lois in their office. She didn't look up from her typing, he knew that she was busy with her story about Kara's latest save. Her efforts as 'Supergirl' had really helped Clark when he had come out of the Superhero Closest. It seemed like the city had already warmed up to the idea of a stranger from a strange land, of course, Lois had what she thought was an obvious explanation.

"_Nobody complains about a babe in a short skirt, Clark. It doesn't matter what she's doing._"

It brought a smile to his face when he thought about how Lois and Kara had gotten along after she found out that Lois knew their secret. But now it was time to reveal his secret to Lois, he just had to use all of his might to keep her from seeing right through him if he was going to sell this.

"Lois, sweetie, I need your help with something," he started. She looked up with a quirked eyebrow. "You remember all the times that Bruce and Chloe gave us a hard time about...you know...that time at Watchtower?" Lois blushed and nodded.

"Well they came to visit us, but I think they got a bit side-tracked in the break-room if you know what I mean..."

Lois frowned, and then saw what he was saying. If she hadn't wanted to get back at her cousin so bad for all her little jabs and pokes after the _incident_ at Watchtower, she might have noticed how nervous Clark looked right now. He knew how to play her so well sometimes.

"You wanna bust them?" she asked with an evil smirk. He smiled and nodded as she sprinted for the door with Clark in tow towards the break-room.

She almost wanted to get Olsen to take a picture of the Dark Knight and Blondie, but thought better of exposing him to his sister-in-law in _that _way. Lois slowly opened the door to the break-room, trying to be as stealthy as possible, but jumped back in surprise. The vast majority of the Daily Planet staff stood inside wearing party hats and smiles. A banner was strung up, declaring 'Happy Birthday Lois!' in bright red letters. Lois was in shock, but that quickly faded.

_That son of a..._

She spotted Clark standing at the back of the crowd, tall enough to see his shaggy hair over the heads of the rest of the vertically challenged staff. As heads swayed back and forth, she could see that devilish grin that she swore he stole from her. She suspected that while her attention was on the door, he super-sped around to the back door and slipped inside to join the rest of the party waiting inside.

As she worked her way around the side of the crowd, smiling and shaking a few hands but never taking her eyes off her husband for more than a second, he stood with that stupid, stupid grin next to his little partner-in-crime brat Jimmy Olsen.

Clark started to work his way the opposite way of Lois, and Jimmy just smiled at the duo. As if working at the Daily Planet wasn't cool enough, where Henry had worked with Chloe, the greatest newspaper in the world, working with Lois and Clark was the best. They were so funny, especially when Lois was mad.

"You're next, Olsen," she declared as she stomped past him.

Jimmy gulped and watched Perry White, their editor, stop Lois along the way. Jimmy really like Perry as well. He was gruff, but deep down, he suspected that Mr. White was a big softy. He always let Clark slide when he was late on a deadline, and god forbid he hold out on Lois when a hot story came along.

"Now, I'll tell you what Lois, you can take a day or two off if you'd like since it's your birthday. Maybe a get-away with Clark?" Perry offered.

"You wish, Chief, now outta my way, I got a farmboy to kill."

As Lois marched over to Clark, having finally caught him, Jimmy couldn't help but smile. His big brother talked about Lois and Clark plenty of times, and he was so excited that he had become friends with them. CK was the coolest. So what if he grew up a farm? He always had the funniest stories about Chloe and Lois that had him gripping his sides in pain from laughing so hard. He even told him about a time when Henry was a spy! _How crazy is that?_

Lois was just as feisty and unpredictable as Henry said she was, not to mention totally hot. Jimmy popped his head up and looked over at Clark.

_'I did not just call Lois Lane, aka CK's wife, hot. I didn't,' _Jimmy gulped nervously._ 'I really hope CK can't read minds.'_

It looked like he couldn't. He was busy getting dragged away by Lois, her hand viciously gripping his tie. CK really loved her, and he didn't care what she was going to do to him in that supply closest that Jimmy found himself keeping people from entering on a daily basis. He asked Clark how he was able to do it everyday, put up with the unpredictable storm that was Lois Lane, CK just looked at him like he asked what color the sky was.

"_Jimmy, the thing about Lois, is I really never know if she's going to kill me or kiss me. But you know what? I can't wait to find out, because either way, I'm always going to be left completely breathless_," he had told him. Jimmy just rolled his eyes and made a goofy face.

_Yeah. CK was about as corny as that cornfield Lois always talked about finding him in._

_

* * *

_

**Author's Note:** Well, I thought that went well. I'm sure you all figured out what was up before it got to the grand reveal, but I tried, haha. I love the idea that Jimmy looks up to Clark like a big brother and that he's torn between finding Lois hot and scary. Anybody get the 'alternate universe' joke about Richard White and Lois Lane? That little bit almost ruined Superman Returns for me, but I guess there had to be some personal angst for Clark. I wish they had found another way though, a happy Lois and Clark make me happy. Bickering can be happiness too, haha.

Next up? Martha Kent attends a big event in Clark and Lois' life. Care to guess what event?


	7. Martha

**Review Comments:**

_**Ina100years**_ - Why thank you very much. I'm not sure if I see _Little_ Jimmy showing up in Season 10, but I like to think that with all of the other regulars coming back for Season 10, we might see _Big_ Jimmy return in a flashback ala Jonathan Kent.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Great, I was hoping for that response! haha.

_**sunset**_ - I think we'll see a chapter or two where Clark might be jealous, but it'll always end the right way. I too enjoy that dynamic of Clois and Jimmy, he was far too underused on Smallville and it was almost criminal how underused he was in Superman Returns, especially with such a great actor. I will use the title in the story in some of the chapters, I just think sometimes it's a bit too much to use it in every chapter if you know what I mean?

Oh, and believe me, I'm going to be going back and doing 'inside the chapter but from different POV' stuff for some of the chapter. COUGHshelbyCOUGH, haha, I plan on this particular Watchtower reference being the whole plot of another chapter. I don't want to give anything away, but you might see two of your guesses in the next couple chapters! haha, hope you stick around to see what happens next!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #7, Martha Kent

**Author's Note: **I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with this one, but I came up with this idea because of the 'Jonathan' chapter and some of the reviews, so I hope that you like it. We'll be jumping around a bit and feature lines from 'Persuasion', 'Crusade', 'Fade'. Post Season 10.

* * *

She wasn't sure if Lois remembered asking, but Martha did. And she was beyond ecstatic she had said yes, because Lois looked absolutely beautiful in her old wedding gown. Just the memory of that phone call brought a smile to her face.

_"Oh, Mrs. K, can I really?" Lois asked as if Martha was going to say anything else. Deep down, Martha knew something was up. Lois Lane did not gush on the phone about wedding dresses and wedding plans. She just didn't. But until Clark fixed whatever was going on, she'd enjoy this moment. She loved Lois like a daughter, and she hoped that someday they'd have this conversation for real._

_"Of course Lois, if you and Clark are going to get married, I would be honored if you would wear my dress on your special day."_

_"Thanks so much, but uh, actually? I'm wearing it right now!" Lois twirled around in excitement. Martha could practically hear her smile over the phone. __"I found it in the back of your closet."_

_"Honey, I'm so happy for you," she told her future daughter-in-law. She was bursting with joy. __"I know, Clark will just love it," Lois said. _

_Martha said her congratulations, but what Lois said next caught her by surprise, "Thanks...Mom." __That one word, those three letters, made Martha Kent light up like the fourth of July. She had always wanted a daughter, and for that moment, Lois was just that._

Sure, they ended up calling it off. But they got there eventually, and that's what mattered to her. Even before they finally gave in and told each other how they felt, Martha had hoped for this day to come along. Her son had married Lois Lane, she smiled brightly at the fresh memory of 'I do'. It seemed funny that when she had first met Lois, Martha wanted nothing more than to keep her away from Clark. Now, she couldn't imagine them apart.

"_I never thought Chole'd fall for the farm boy type,_" Lois had said. Martha tried to warn her that it happens to the best of us, but Lois was so sure that she wouldn't be one of them. "_Give me a nerd with glasses any day of the week,_" she told her.

Thinking back on it, Martha wondered if Clark choose to the wear glasses now because of Lois' apparent fondness of them even more so than because he needed them as part of his everyday disguise when he wasn't Superman.

Someone snapped her out of her thoughts by clinking their glass and the group began to chant for the happy couple to kiss. Across the crowd, she saw Perry White clap with joy. They were still friends, he had taken the editor position at the Daily Planet and had become close to Clark. Part of her never recovered from that weekend with him in Smallville years ago, she had felt like she had seen Jonathan's ghost that weekend.

She still dated. She still got lonely. But sometimes she felt like the memory of Jonathan was enough to keep her warm at night. On nights like tonight, on nights when she wished nothing more than for him to see what their son had become, she missed him the most. Looking at the new couple, she couldn't help but remember telling Lois that she would find her own Jonathan someday, not quite realizing it would be her Clark.

"_What worries me is that when my Jonathan finally does come around, I'll be looking the other way, and I'll miss him completely,_" Lois responded.

As it turns out, it's pretty hard to miss a guy in a big red cape. Clark slowly won her over, just as Jonathan slowly won her over. She thought back to the first time Jonathan had seen it. The first time either of them had really seen it.

_Lois and Clark were in the kitchen doing dishes, Jonathan's idea after Martha had worked so hard to cook dinner. They cuddled on the couch, watching a movie that she couldn't quite recall. It wasn't often that Jonathan spent time in the house just relaxing so Martha's attention was far from the TV._

_Every few minutes, they could hear Lois and Clark whispering, probably louder than they intended, and then a slight thud._

_"Should we check to see if one of them killed the other?" she had asked her husband._

_He grinned that Kent grin that always made her weak in the knees, "Sweetheart, I think Clark would have the upper-hand and besides, we raised him well enough not to kill house-guests, didn't we?" They gave each other a sweet smile before realization set in._

_This was Lois Lane they were talking about._

_Not only was she the one person that could probably drive Clark to kill someone, she was also the one person who probably could find a way to kill their son without using a meteor rock to do it. And she did seem to be making herself at home in Clark's room._

_They shot each other a look and slowly got off the couch, doing their best to sneak towards the kitchen. One thing they had noticed was that Clark rarely seemed to be paying attention to his super-hearing when Lois was around, whatever that meant. Maybe her voice was loud enough to drain everything else out._

Martha smiled softly at the memory. '_It was because he was too busy hanging on her every word,_' she thought to herself.

_Jonathan took the first glance, then Martha snuck a look. They were standing at the sink, she was washing and he was drying. Every few moments, Clark would whisper that she missed a spot and then Lois would elbow him as hard as she could without hurting herself. Clark would just laugh and then point out another missed spot, quickly Lois was splashing him with water. As an all out water fight began, Martha went to walk in and put an end to their little game, but Jonathan grabbed her shoulder gently and pulled her back._

_"What's is it?" she asked._

_Jonathan kept watching his son. His son's smile. Sure, he had noticed that Clark seemed a little more happier than usual lately. But he assumed it had to do with finally being on the football team. But now he wasn't so sure. As he replayed all the moments in his head of when his son had that smile, it was when Lois was here. It was when Lois was giving him a hard time, or when he was giving her a hard time._

_"Look at Clark," he said. Martha looked over, not quite seeing what the fuss was about._

_"What about him?"_

_Jonathan flashed her that ole Kent grin again, "He's happy."_

_Looking back, she watched as Clark had his forearm over Lois' wrists to keep her from blocking the water so he could splash her some more. He laughed in a way that he usually reserved for the most special of occasions when he was truly happy. She also noticed how Lois didn't seem to mind leaning in towards him._

_"You think..." she wondered._

_"No, no, not yet. But I'll tell you what, they keep this up, we'll have to lock him in the storm cellar too," he joked._

_Martha let out a laugh, slapping her husband's arm and causing both Lois and Clark to look their way._

_"I'm sorry, Mrs. K," she started. "Smallville here decided to make a mess because he was jealous of my dish washing skills."_

_This caused Clark to gasp dramatically, something Martha wasn't accustomed to, and then the bickering began as they argued over who was the better dish washer. Jonathan walked into the kitchen to break them up, and Martha took in the scene. _

_Lois had only been around for a little while, but she had already wormed her way into all their hearts. __Lois was like the daughter she never had, and Clark, well, he didn't mind her nearly as much as he claimed. She hoped that Lois would be around for quite some time._

The thought brought her back to the present, part of Martha's hopes that Clark would make Lois an official part of the family began that day, and Clark made that come true today. But when she looked back up to see the couple, she noticed that they were no where to be found.

Pete Ross walked through her eye-line, causing her to call out to him and ask where the couple had run off to.

_"_I'm not sure, Mrs. Kent, one minute Lois was whispering something into his ear, the next minute they were gone. You know how it is with Clark, he has a bad habit of speeding off without notice," joked Pete before walking away. She hadn't seen him in so long, he hadn't changed a bit.

As she looked around some more, she accepted the fact that they were no where to be found. If she knew her new daughter-in-law...she couldn't help but smile widely at finally being able to think of that little fact being official. If she knew her daughter-in-law, Lois was either on the verge of killing Clark or starting their wedding night a little bit early.

Either way, wherever they were, she knew her son was happy. And that made her as happy as she could be without her own Jonathan.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Sooooo, I kind of just winged it, there was a request to see Jonathan again, and he was back in the flashback. I couldn't think of how to bring him back in a large role with anyone else's chapter, he usually kept to Clark and Martha for the most part. It was nice to bring back Pete, I don't think we'll be seeing him show up in Season 10 since he's gotten himself into a speck of trouble in his real life.

The next chapter is Kara, but there might be a change of plans from Brainiac (wait, what?) in Chapter 9 to a very special guest-star.

So, what did you guys think? Originally, I thought this would suffice as the Jonathan cameo since I don't know where else I might fit him in, though I do have a few cameos in mind, I just have to figure out what chapter to put them in, but lately I think we'll have a whole Jonathan chapter as I changed Chapter 3 to 'the Kents' instead of 'Jonathan'. It was really more of a 'Kents' Chapter anyways. Hit the review button, and happy Christmas Eve!


	8. Kara

**Review Comments:**

**_jade2nightwing_** - That's the thing about Jonathan Kent: he always seems to know whats best. haha. Very wise man.

_**katlynne**_ - How anyone not love Mr. Kent? haha. He's the best. And yeah, I was trying to come up with something that Clark could tell her that would cause her to miss the fact that Clark is the worst liar in the world, haha. As for what she did with him, we've gotta keep it at least a little family friendly around here, haha. Wait until you read the 'Bruce' chapter, you might get a better idea what she does when she pulls Clark off into dark corners, haha.

_**sunset**_ - The Shelby chapter is coming together nicely, which chapter is WT? haha, Watchtower?

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Shades of Jimmy/Kara

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #8, Kara Kent

**Author's Note: **Love the character, love the performance, hope she shows up before the end of Season 10. Supergirl is one of those characters that offers a chance for Clark to have a member of his biological family be part of his family on Earth. I wish we got to see her more, way too underused in my opinion.

I originally intended to put scenes from 'Bloodline' and 'Supergirl' in this one, but went all original instead.

* * *

It was hard to feel at home on Earth when it wasn't too long ago that her home was on Krypton. Unlike Kal-El, she had a whole life on their home planet. She had years of memories with her family. He told her it wasn't good to live in the past, but there were times when she couldn't help it.

She was slowly coming to see this place as home, though. Diana had taken her under her wing, Kara loved Paradise Island, it was so beautiful. Bruce eventually got over his distrust and had even given her some training to help her detective skills. Of course Kal-El was always pleased to have her visit the Kent Farm. She had to admit, she liked being at the farm with Lois and 'Clark'. She was also very fond of Shelby once he warmed up to her.

One of her favorite things though, was watching Kal-El get into trouble with Lois. It was the most amusing thing in the world to her. There was Kal-El, her cousin that she loved like a brother, completely invincible. And yet, he seemed legitimately afraid of Lois. A human.

_"Smallville, Why did Shelby have an entire pork-chop?"_

_Lois had decided to experiment with cooking again during Kara's latest visit. All of the powers in the world couldn't make her cooking taste good, especially not when Lois forgot to check the food because she was busy trying to convince Clark that 'Stiletto' was a perfectly good name for a super-hero. Clark tried to pass a large portion of his meal to Shelby, who got about half way out of the room before spitting it out on the floor. Next to Lois. In plain sight._

_Clark looked over at Kara, whom was hiding a smile with her hand and fork. 'Traitor,' he thought._

_"Clark, did you not like my pork-chop?"_

_"It's...not that I didn't like it. It's that, well, I mean...Shelby is part of the family too...only seems fair that he get to eat too, right Kara?" he rambled._

_Kara looked at Lois, who had put her hand on her hip and was glaring. "I don't know Clark, it's so good, I don't think I could share mine."_

_This prompted the most slack-jawwed, completely thrown look that Kara had ever seen her cousin make. And one look to Lois told her that she was in the clear with that little improv piece. She would have to thank Dick Grayson for teaching her the value of banter under pressure._

_"What do you have to say for yourself, Clark?" Lois asked. She held the pork-chop in her hand, showing him Exhibit-A of this little trial._

_Clark thought long and hard about what to say, "I love you?"_

_Lois rolled her eyes and threw the pork-chop at him before stomping into the kitchen with a huff. When it bounced off his cheek and left a trail of barbecue sauce on his face, Kara left out a chuckle. This prompted Clark to scoop up corn and throw it at her in retaliation._

_"Even you couldn't have chewed that brick," he told her._

_"I'm in the kitchen, not in the barn, you moron!" Lois shouted, causing Clark to drop his head on the table and crack it. 'Just keeps getting better.'_

Then there were other times when they did what Lois called 'banter'. Kara didn't find this so much amusing as she found it desirable. Not that she found her cousin or his wife desirable, but Kara did long to have someone to banter with. She had really liked James, she hated when other people called him Jimmy. He was such a sweet boy, and he had a wonderful sense of humor. She wished they could have bantered like Lois and Clark did.

It seemed so exciting to Kara. The way Clark and Lois did it, it was almost like a chess match. One would make a move, then the other would make a move. It was all in good fun, but it was so competitive at the same time. She remembered when they helped pick her name.

_"I think that Uber-Girl is a great name, Smallville," Lois defended._

_Clark looked to Kara, whom was more interested in watching the two of them banter than the actual name picking. "That sounds ridiculous, Lois. Besides, I'm not sure you are the person to go to when it comes to picking a super-hero's name."_

_Lois looked offended. "I named Ollie didn't I? The Green Arrow seems to be working out pretty well for him."_

_"And what about the Red-Blur Blur? Or how about Stilleto?" he said, remembering her brief stint among Metropolis' heroes. He didn't actually mind the name itself, he just knew that it was going to get him the reaction he was looking for. He couldn't help but smirk as he saw her eyes narrow._

_"And what was wrong with those names? Would you have preferred a name that suited your outfit? Like Plaid-Boy?"_

_"Boy? I really think I'm more suited for something along the lines of Man or Guy, don't you?"_

_She smirked, he had walked right into her trap. "I don't know, Smallville, that Elmur Fudd nightlight says otherwise."_

_His eyes narrowed, taking a step towards her. "I'm not the one that wears little pink bunny slippers that smell worse than Shelby when he's wet."_

_'He did not just go there.' She took a step closer towards him, they were very close now._

_Kara just watched on awe. She didn't know what was going to happen next, but she knew it was going to be exciting. Usually, if Lois was losing and she had no place left to go, she would just throw herself at Kal-El and kiss him until he forgot what they were talking about. If he really zinged her, she'd attack him and normally he would pretend like she was hurting him, even going as far as saying 'uncle' when she requested, whatever that meant._

That's what Kara wanted. She wanted someone that made her want to kiss him one moment and kill him the next. Lois told her that she was a babe, but she still hadn't found a guy that brought out the same fire in her that she saw in Lois when she was with Kal-El.

The more she thought about it, the more she thought, '_Maybe I should just hit a cute boy with a car, that's what Lois did._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** I wanted to end it with her noticing someone she might take interest in, but I couldn't think of anyone. If you say Bart, I'll give you a hint about a future chapter, he finds someone that has had some bad luck with guys, haha. Hint Hint. haha. Hope everyone is having a great Holiday!


	9. Brainiac

**Review Comments:**

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I thought about pairing Bart and Kara, but I found another pairing for him that I liked a little bit more. I strongly suspect that I'll find a partner for Kara in another chapter, but look for the Bart pairing in the next few chapters.

_**sunset**_ - Yeah, I was pretty disappointed to hear she wasn't going to have much of a bigger role in Season 10. Kara represents Clark's only biological family and that's pretty huge for him. I hope she'll appear again before the end of the show, there was a quick reference to her by Emil in one episode, so she's still on Earth doing her Supergirl thing. I'm crossing my fingers for her return.

_**PSB**_ - Thanks, I really liked League too. I've always enjoyed the 'real life' side of Superheroes, maybe thats why I like Smallville so much, haha. A lot of these chapters will show that side, so it's good to hear that you enjoyed it.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #9, Brainiac

**Author's Note: **I absolutely love this character. When he came back in 'Homecoming', I thought James Marsters' performance was great. This is one of those characters that traveled the road not often traveled, coming back as a good guy after being _such_ a bad guy. Just the way he talks and the simplistic way he says such complex and huge notions, I loved him and one of my favorite Smallville lines were uttered by this guy. You'll see it below. Enjoy.

We've got excerpts from a few episodes in this one. Quote from 'Absolute Justice' at the tippy top, scenes from each of 'Crusade', 'Crossfire', and finally 'Homecoming'. I tried to pick some of the bigger moments, without using ones that I have in other chapters.

* * *

"_You are the one he will need. He is the one you will need_." - Doctor Fate, Absolute Justice.

How do you show the World's Greatest Hero the error of his ways? How do you show him the path?

Brainiac had quickly decided, as he had done everything, that he would show Kal-El the most defining moments of his life. His father's death was simple enough because it was the moment Kal-El chose to blame himself. The Green Arrow should be suffice in showing Kal-El how he has chosen to not only blame himself, but blame others for their past mistakes as well, never moving on and letting it consume him.

And then there was Lois.

Even a super-computer like Brainiac 5 was stumped on what to reveal to Clark. He had to show him something, she was more the point to this than anything else. He simply could not show him the way without her. Should he show when they first met?

_Was that...was that a body? 'Oh god, not again,' she thought. 'Why am I always hitting things with my car? Wait, is he naked?'_

_Lois got out of her car, walking around to the front. Whoever this guy was, he didn't seem hurt. He was starting to stand and, well, she was starting to stare. 'Why was there a naked guy in the middle of the freakin' corn field?' she thought to herself._

_"Oh my god," she started. "Are you...are you okay? What's your name?"_

_He told her he didn't know._

_"I need to get you to a hospital," she told him. He had the nerve to say he was fine. "You've just been hit by lighting, you're stark naked, and you don't remember your own name. You have a fairly loose definition of the word 'fine'."_

_When he turned around, she had to shoot her head up to avoid looking at what she would come to refer to fondly as 'Clark Jr'._

_"Look at his face," yeah, well, she was never one for self-control. She looked elsewhere, and it wasn't at corn. "I have a blanket in the trunk, don't move. I'll be right back" she had told him. This was officially the weirdest night of her life._

_"Wait, who are you?" he asked._

_"Lois. Lois Lane." She said it so weightless, neither knew that their lives had just been changed forever._

No, that didn't show what he needed to see. Possibly something more recent, like their first kiss?

_He wasn't sure what the plan was here. Chloe told him to ask himself what he wanted, and what he wanted was Lois. What he didn't want, was to ruin what they had. He knew he if pushed her too fast, too soon, things would never be the same and he couldn't live with that. She was standing at her desk, looking beautiful as always. For a man that was practically invincible, he had never been more scared in his entire life._

_"Lois?"_

_She turned with a fury. "Did you hear? The brilliant brass over at KZXP have decided to go with someone else for their morning show."_

_He swallowed. He said her name once more, but she continued one._

_"After everything that happened, after Ollie and I almost got killed, guess who they've decided to go with?" She thrust a photo of his blind-date in his face. At this particular moment, he couldn't even remember her name. "Apparently blondes test better with morning viewers."_

_"Lois!"_

_But she just kept on. "I'm sorry, I never should have tried out in the first place, or dragged you with me, and I just-"_

_He did it. He did the one thing he'd been wanting to do since he saw her standing there. He kissed her. And needless to say, she was shocked. But he wasn't going to pull away. If she wanted to end it, she could pull away. Thank god, she didn't pull away. She roped her arms around him and kissed right back._

No. He needed to see what she meant to him. What she drove him to become. Maybe something a little ahead in the future?

_"I am going to kill you, Clark Kent!" she raged in the Kent kitchen._

_He stood there silently. He knew better than to open his mouth. It really wasn't his fault, technically speaking, he was kind of unconscious and under the rubble of an entire building. Sure, he held up the first couple of floors, but that was a big building, he couldn't keep it all from falling on him._

_"Honestly, I am your wife! Did it never occur to you that I would be scared? That I would be worried? When you ran off to face that...that...what the hell do you call that thing?" she screamed at him. He flinched, considered explaining the unconscious thing, but decided just to answer._

_"Mongul."_

_"When I let you run off to face that Mongul thing, I thought you were sure you take it. But oh no, you let it kick your red and blue ass all across the city and finally, you let an entire building fall on top of you. Therefore burying you under tons and tons of bricks and metal. You are lucky that Kara was wearing an outfit that lent her the option of pockets so I could call her, because without her x-ray vision, who knows how long it would have taken to find you!"_

_Shelby made his way downstairs to see what all the commotion was, seeing Lois pacing, he made a quick u-turn back towards the living room._

_'Smart dog,' Clark thought._

_"Do you know how I felt? Do you, Smallville? Do you have any idea?" she asked._

_Clark shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He shook his head every so slightly. He was so certain she was going to kill him. They both knew that he kept some green kryptonite in a lead box inside of the far left drawer, just in case. They had enough slip-ups to know better._

_"I wanted to kill you for almost getting yourself killed! I wanted to wring your stupid, stupid, stupid, plaid-wearing neck!" she shouted. She had begun to smack his arm with every 'stupid', and when she got to 'neck', she grabbed him around his neck. "And now? Do you know how I feel now?"_

_Clark gulped and looked around at all the potential weapons in the kitchen. He looked at her with a look of fear despite being invincible to just about anything she had to throw at him. But when she suddenly jammed her lips into his and sent both him, the chair, and herself to the kitchen floor, he realized something._

_'Even I'm not invincible to a Lois Lane kiss.'_

No, somehow, that wasn't going to get the point across. Ultimately, he decided to show him a future where protected his secret. A future where she chose to stand along side him and push him to become the man he was destined to be.

Not that Kal-El was willing to wait that long, and because of his disobedience, Brainiac had ended up in the Dark Ages where you have to answer a lot of questions if you pop out of thin air. Luckily, he avoided the torches and pitchforks, sending himself to meet Kal-El in the future at the Daily Planet. When they returned to the present, they saw Greg Arkin show his gratitude to Lois for what Clark had done to him, and he knew that Kal-El finally saw it.

"_A hero is made in the moment, not from questioning the past or fearing what's to come. Just remember that Kal-El._"

Clark probably didn't even correctly understand the statement at the time. Thinking off to some moment where he was facing a monster or a task that seemed impossible to overcome. But Brainiac knew the truth. He knew that _this_ hero, was made in _this_ moment. Because this was the moment he chose to let Lois Lane into his life completely. This was the first step towards a partnership that would define him more than the cape or the shield ever would.

This was the moment that all the roads of Clark Kent, Kal-El, the Traveler, the Blur, and Naman crashed together.

This was the moment that he became Superman, he just didn't know it yet.

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, we have that 'she is going to kill me' moment followed by the BOOM, lip-on-lip contact. I think it'll get old to have 'kill me or kiss me' in every chapter, so I figured why not have some actual action? I really liked seeing Brainiac as a good guy and I loved James Marsters performance, so I had to bring him back. I hope you guys liked it, wouldn't mind a review to let me know it.

Next up: Not sure yet, probably Jor-El, there is something else in the works that might push Jor-El to Chapter 11.


	10. Jor El Clone

**Review Comments:**

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I'm glad someone else likes ole Brainiac too.

_**clarkfan325**_ - I remember an old Dick Grayson quote about how Barbara Gordon (Batgirl) is the only superhero that makes him feel inadequate, and it's always made me think of the women in superhero's lives as the only people who could put the fear in them. I fully expect that we'll see at least one of each of those point of views, especially Shelby. I'm looking forward to posting his chapter soon.

_**A,sky**_ - Yeah, Homecoming has to be one of my favorite episodes. Sorry I used a comma in your name instead of a period, it kept erasing your name until I tried that instead.

_**tooblind**_ - Haha, having the chance to write makes it easier on me too. I'll give you a little late christmas present, we might not have seen the end of Jo'an just yet! haha. Ever since that cutout of Lois and Clark for their morning TV Show, I've enjoyed the image of Lois using Clark's tie to her advantage. I too hope Chloe finds something, and I promise we'll see her find that here as well before this story is over.

_**cupcake51**_ - Lois is a military brat, I imagine she can make just about anything into a weapon, haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm choosing to see them as two separate Jimmys and enjoying them as such, haha. No one can replace 'Big Jimmy', but 'Little Jimmy' should be a nice addition to the Daily Planet staff. Haha, let's just say that if you liked the aciton, you're going to like the 'Bruce' chapter.

_**sunset**_ - I have my fingers crossed too, we'll see what happens. In the meantime, Chapter 11 should get you by, see below! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jor-El/Lara

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #10, Jor-El (Clone)

**Author's Note: **This one takes place during 'Kandor' from Season 9, I want to do a chapter for each of the Jor-El's (Clone, Fortress, Krypton) because he is such an important character in Clark's story. I hope that you guys recognize the 'Kryptonian saying' that he tells Chloe.

**

* * *

**

Taking in Chloe Sullivan's story, Jor-El could feel his heart break. _Lara_. She was gone. And his son, this Kal-El, had grew up on Earth. Alone. Everything that he thought and felt were ancient history. He was now in a world where he knew none of the facts and only half the story.

'_How could Zod have become such a monster, when he was such a hero?_' he thought. '_Are we all so close to becoming a shell of our former selves?'_

He watched Chloe Sullivan with the animal, a dog she had called it. _Shelby_.

"Is this a common pet?" he asked.

Chloe looked up in surprise, but patted Shelby's head and ruffled his hair. "Man's best friend, this little rascal is Lois and Clark's" she told him. "Even if she won't admit it", she muttered. Jor-El gave her a confused look, _she had not mentioned a Lois when she explained Kal-El's history._

"Lois?" he asked.

"Oh, uh, she's his...oh boy, what would you call her? Umm, I guess his girlfriend?" she decided, he did kiss her last night after all.

Jor-El looked confused.

"It's kind of complicated, you see. They used to be friends, but deep down, there is so much more. They've been dancing around it for so long now, geeze, I don't know, a couple years at least? They jump around wanting to be together and wanting to kill each other," she explains.

She takes a sip of her water while he looks more confused than ever. "You mean to say, they cannot decide whether to love one another, or to kill one another?" he asks. Chloe chokes on her drink and chuckles.

"They love each other, no doubt about it. Even if they won't admit it," she said.

Jor-El seemed to lighten at that.

"And I don't think they'd kill each other, they can't live without each other. Maybe more along the lines of injure? Lois is a little more keen on the injury, Clark is a little more keen on the kissing," she joked.

This brought a smile to his face.

"This, Lois, reminds me of my own wife, Lara. She was very brave, very compassionte, and a partner that challenged me in every way," he explained.

Chloe was mesmerized. How often do you get to hear about Clark Kent's biological family?

"There is a saying on Krypton about children," he began, but then darkened. "There _was_ a saying. 'You will make my strength your own, and you will see my life through your eyes, as your life will be seen through mine. The son becomes the father, and the father becomes the son.' Kal-El sounds like he has become a great man."

She could feel tears stinging her eyes. She wished Clark could hear this now. Wiping a tear that got away, she smiled, "He really has."

"You are a good person for telling me about my son, Chloe Sullivan."

She couldn't hold back the chuckle.

"Being around your son will do that to a person."

A vibration in her pocket causes Chloe to pull out her cell-phone and see a text message from Clark, '_we're in the air._' She looked up at Jor-El, he was still taking it all in. She couldn't help but feel sad for him, but she knew that meeting his son would fix a lot of the cracks in he felt in his heart right now.

"In the barn, in the loft, there is a trunk with some of Clark's belongings. Why don't you check them out? Maybe get to know your son a little better? I'm going to try and give him a call. They're flying back from where you landed as we speak," she told him.

Jor-El nodded and made his way towards the barn.

Before entering, he looked back at the Kent House. He hoped that these Kents, Jonathan and Martha, held the same love in their hearts that Hiram Kent held in his. He hoped that his son hadn't felt alone, but it sounded like whatever his childhood had been, he wasn't alone now. He had this Lois Lane.

It sounded like she filled his heart with love, and with that, he'd never truly be alone.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, I liked that one. When I first saw Julian Sands, I didn't like him for the role, but he impressed my socks off. There was something about him that just seemed to fit. I really liked him in 'Kandor' and then again in 'Abandoned'. A lot of heart that we don't normally get to see in Jor-El, probably because the other Jor-El is a Fortress, but I think you know what I mean.

This one was a bit shorter than the rest, but I didn't have all that much to work with, which is why we don't really get an actual moment involving Clark and Lois because he really never saw Lois and spent just a few moments with Clark before dying. Hope it still works though.

Next up: Shelby


	11. Shelby

**Review Comments:**

_**PSB**_ - Thanks!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Haha, yeah, I think that's the Clark Kent and Lois Lane dynamic.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad, I was worried about not actually having Lois and Clark in a chapter, not seeing how to connect it, but I found a way, haha. I too wish that Clark had more time with him, I think his appearance in Abandoned will probably do it for him this season, but you never know! haha.

_**TurqoiseBlue**_ - Thank you! That's what I'm trying to do, getting into the heads of our favorite characters. I too enjoyed James Marsters on Buffy. I've pretty much started to just assume anyone associated to Joss Whedon is awesome, because lets face it, Joss is Boss. haha.

_**sunset**_ - I wouldn't say I have anything planned quite yet, haha, but I intend to do a chapter for each. The only Lois and Clark moment that the Fortress has seen is the time that Lois went and yelled at the Fortress to treat Clark better. So I'm trying to find something to work around that idea. I agree, 'Kandor' was a missed chance to show some Jor-El and Clark time, I had hoped that Jor-El might give Clark some instructions on how to fly or how to become the hero that he wants to be. As for the Shelby chapter, how about you read it below and let me know! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #11, Shelby

**Author's Note: **I know a lot of people have been waiting for a Shelby chapter, and I knew how I wanted to go do it, but I couldn't quite get it right. I think I'm pretty happy with the way it turned out. This basically takes place during Chapter 3, aka 'the Kents'.

Sorry it took so long, hopefully this meets everyone's standards for a true Shelby chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

I like humans, but I love Lois and Clark.

"I am not lathering up that mutt, Smallville. And why is it smiling at me?"

Lois pretends that she doesn't like me. But she always gives me treats when Clark isn't looking. She crosses her arms and glares at Clark.

"Just think about it like washing your hair, it's about the same color," he jabs with a smirk.

Oh boy, here they go.

Lois pretends like she doesn't like Clark either. Clark does the same thing to her. But I'm a dog. I hear and see everything. I know better. Lois likes to steal Clark's shirts, and when she gets caught, she always blames it on me. I'm a dog. What do I need plaid shirts for?

And him? Oh boy, try and get him to play fetch when Lois comes over! Fat chance.

"Keep it up. I'll walk right on out of here and you'll have to do this all by your lonesome," she replied.

"Oh no, how ever will I make it without Lois Lane?"

She eyed him with a glare, but she made no move to exit the barn. I let my tongue drop out and smiled. I know that at this rate, they will forget that they were planning on giving me a bath. Clark smirked and tossed her the bottle of shampoo. I watched her walk over behind Clark, who was filling up the bath with some water, and I knew that smile on her face didn't mean anything good. Well, not anything good for Clark.

"You know what, Smallville?" she asked, pouring some shampoo into her hand. "You are so right."

Clark smiled and nodded his head. I didn't think he knew what was coming, but then he frowned. "Wait, wha-" Before he could turn around, Lois ran her hand through his hair and rubbed the dog shampoo in as well as she could before he could retaliate.

"Lois!"

He jumped up and ran his hand through his hair, finding a large glob of my shampoo. He looked up at her with a glare, but she didn't back down, only throwing her hands onto her hips and giving him the famous Lois Lane smirk. His lips turned up with an idea. I watched Clark slowly let the hose slide down his hand. Before Lois could react, he put his thumb over the top and sprayed her.

Lois was soaked from head-to-toe, and I knew that would be the end of any bath for me.

"Clark Kent, you are so dead!"

She raced around towards Clark, who ran away laughing. Lois made the smart move and stepped on the hose tagging behind Clark, jerking it out of his hand and into her possession. Now Lois was the one doing the smiling, Clark was doing the shuffle, and I was jumping in the newly formed puddles.

This was so much fun!

"Now, You gotta ask yourself something: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well? Do ya, Smallville?"

Clark smiled at her with an idea, and before she could spray him, he sprinted towards her and jumped over the bath he was preparing. Lois wasn't expecting this and froze in her place before lifting the hose to try and spray him. He saw this coming, pushing the hose upwards, spraying both of them. In her surprise, her grip loosened and he got it back from her. She started running from him, and he participated in a merry chase.

"Don't you dare, Kent!"

"Why? Are you going to melt, Lane?" he laughed.

Bouncing back and forth, I weaved inside and outside, running along side of them.

"I'm going to kick your big, plaid covered butt, Farmboy!"

"Aww, Lois, so you have been checking me out?"

Clark finally caught up with her, gripping her around the waist and lifting her into the air. He didn't seem to care that he was getting himself just as wet as he was getting her. I thought she'd kill him, but she was laughing just as hard as he was when he put her down and stepped a few paces back.

"You are so dead! I'm going to kill you!" she yelled with a smile.

"Bring it on, Mad Dog," he retorted with a smirk.

Lois might say that she wants to kill Clark, but deep down, I think she'd rather kiss him. I'm a dog. I see and hear everything. I know better.

And I also knew that as she ran towards him, I'm totally getting out of a bath!

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, there we have it. Even Shelby wants Lois and Clark to be together. If that's not the Universe speaking, I don't know what is. This was fun to write, I have to admit. The big problem for me was how to present it from a Shelby perspective. I tried to keep it pretty simple, Einstein or not, he is still a dog. I think we got there though, did you like it? A review is a great way to let me know!

On a side note about updating, I still intend to update everyday, and I have been trying to do it at roughly 12 pm my time each day, but that's going to have to change starting today. My 'christmas break' from work is officially over, so it'll likely be closer 12 pm Eastern Time now instead of 4 pm ET. Either way I will make sure that a chapter is up each day at a decent time so that you guys can shoot me any questions or comments for the next chapter. If anything, you'll have more time to read it and get a reply by the next chapter because they will be earlier posts (my time).

Hope you guys are having as much fun as I am!

**Next up:** _the Loft_.


	12. The Loft

**Review Comments:**

_**tooblind**_ - Haha, well, he wasn't named Einstein for nothing! I hope I didn't spoil anything for 'Kandor' for you in my replies or comments within the story! It really is a great episode. I'm sure you'll love it. I'll be sure to look into the post-Crossfire idea, it would be an interesting one!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - He has always been a little bit ahead of the curve, hasn't he? haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad you liked it! I thought it'd be fun to do a POV chapter, and since Lois and Clark are doing a lot more talking and action in this one instead of thinking, I thought I'd take advantage and do a Shelby POV. The only problem with POV is that you only hear the thoughts of that person, and it's so much more fun to see what each person is thinking i think. Haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Well, wait no more! Enjoy the chapter now! haha.

_**katlynne**_ - Thank you!

_**clarkfan325**_ - I fully intend to include more Shelby and the Kents in future chapters. As for the show, I like to think with Lois and Clark being together, that opens up plenty of opportunities for scenes at the Farm, which hopefully will lead to more scenes including Shelbs.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #12, the Loft

**Author's Note: **This one is the first of a small collection of 'if walls could talk' chapters. The way I see it, some of the locations were exposed to a series of key moments in Lois and Clark's courtship, so it seems only fair to look at things from that perspective as well. Buckle up, this one is a long one.

**

* * *

**

Clark looked around the old loft. His father once called it his Fortress of Solitude, but that was hardly true. The big ice castle in the arctic? Now _that_ was a Fortress of Solitude. The loft? More like the Fortress of Uncomfortable Situations and Memories. It was a magnet for those awkward talks and moments he'd had over the years with a whole mess of different people, but he'd had some special moments here just as often.

_She didn't know why she felt the need to do it. Why she wanted to comfort him so badly, but she whipped around and she did it anyways. There was something about Clark Kent that made her do things she didn't normally do, and this was definitely going to be one of them._

_"Look, sometimes you gotta tuck your feelings away until it's the right time," she said. "Like stuffing dollars into a piggy bank for a bike that you can't quite afford." She couldn't help but think, 'Whew, that went well.'_

_"Except...I can't quite imagine there is someone else out there," he replied._

_'Typical Smallville, such a little brooder. I'm going to cure him of that one day, even if it takes me the rest of our lives...not that...me and Farmboy are spending the rest of our...lives together...'_

_"Well, you never know Clark. Maybe when you finally crack open that piggy bank, you'll find that all this time, you haven't been saving for a bike. You've really been saving for a Harley," she said. 'Oh yeah, I am good. Lois Lane, teenage woes soother. I need my own TV show.'_

_He smiled up at her, and for a moment, they both took in what she had said. On his end, he was seeing her in a new light. On her end, she couldn't help but wonder what the hell she had really meant there. 'I'm not...he won't...I'm not the...nah, he won't think I meant...will he?...did I?'_

_"There are times when I think you don't know me at all," he said with a small Clark Kent smile. "And others when I think you know me better than anyone." She would never admit it in a million years, but she was happy she was sitting down right then. Knees felt a little on the weak side._

_"Well, that's what I'm here for, Smallville. One save at a time," she responded. Before she knew what she was doing, she was smiling in a way that she just didn't do. It was that smile that Clark Kent always found a way to bring out of her, whether it was from surprising her with one of his surprisingly well timed remarks during one of their banter-a-thons, or when he made her feel a kind of comfortable ease that she hadn't felt since her mom passed._

_Neither one would admit it, but both of them went to bed that night wondering what might have happened if Chloe hadn't shown up. As it so often happened, they shared one of their electric looks that sent both of them reeling, but were yet again saved by the bell._

_Either way, deep down, they had known that this little exchange had changed their relationship forever._

He had to smile to himself a little bit. That was the moment he realized how important Lois Lane was in his life. That was was the moment he realized that she was becoming a permanent fixture that he wasn't sure he could live without. Sure, it'd taken a while for him to realize just exactly what _kind_ of fixture she had become, but a part of him knew that something clicked that day. For the both of them.

Clark wandered over towards the old dresser he kept trinkets and keepsakes in. On the floor next to it, he saw something he hadn't seen in years. Picking it up and dusting it off, he couldn't help but chuckle. He couldn't imagine his _Clark Kent of the Daily Planet _persona ever wearing a leather jacket. He tried to remember the last time he wore it, and the memory of Lois' first encounter with red kryptonite came rushing back.

If their conversation about bikes and Harleys had been the first time he realized how important Lois was to him, that had definitely been the first time that he realized how attracted he was to her. Well, at least the first time he had admitted it to himself. _She had to've needed help to get into a skirt that tight._

Their little tryst had began at the farm, but it had quickly continued at the Daily Planet, Queen Tower, and even the Luthor Mansion. When it was all said and done, things had changed forever and he wasn't just talking about Lois. He was pretty sure this was one of the defining moments in his relationship with Lex and it was the first time that Lana had been able to get evidence that Clark Kent was hardly just a farmboy.

Clark couldn't help but smile at the memory of Lois showing up to talk about their night.

_She didn't normally do nervous, but this was one of the most nervous moments of her life. This was Clark Kent after all. And even though the words were never going to fall from her mouth, she needed things to be ok. She needed things between her and Clark to be ok._

_"Well, I guess it's best that neither of us remembers, I can't even really picture the two of us...you don't think...that we..."_

_He smiled at her. Freakin' smiled. "Think that we what?"_

_'DAMMIT CLARK KENT, YOU KNOW WHAT!' she fumed internally._

_"...you know...that we..."_

_And then he smiled wider. Freakin' wider. 'That little son of a ...' she thought. She put on her best puppy dog eyes, trying to get him to see that she was not finding this nearly as funny as he was right now. She needed to know that things were going to be ok, dammit._

_"No, Lois. I think I'd remember."_

_She didn't know if she was happy because they hadn't screwed things up or if it was because he thought she'd be unforgettable. Maybe it was because she knew things were going to be ok, and that opened the door for a little bit of teasing._

_"Yeah, of course you would, highlight of your life."_

_She went to make her escape before he could get her back, but he said something even worse than a snarky retort._

_"But I did find something."_

_Frozen on the stairs, her mind flittered over all the possibilities of what he might have found. He walked over and pulled open a drawer, holding a CD case that he thought she had made for him. When she saw the cover, she had a very shocking revelation._

_"Whitesnake...wow...I must of really liked you."_

_He expected her to say something snarky, but she looked at him with the most vulnerable look he had ever seen her give. His smile faded. He meant for them to laugh. For them to joke. Now he was the one worried about things being ok. This wasn't his usual Lois. This was a Lois that didn't know what to say, didn't know what to do, and that scared the crap out of him. He had to make it better._

_"Don't beat yourself up about it, Lois. I crashed Lana's engagement party. We weren't ourselves yesterday."_

_She smiled a small smile. 'Leave it to Smallville to save me yet again.' She made her exit, but every step from the barn was one of inner-turmoil. She didn't know what to make of all of this, and she certainly didn't know what to make of her emotions a few moments ago._

He still felt a little guilty about the way things had gone that night. Not because he ruined Lana's engagement party, that marriage was hardly meant to be in the first place. Not because he humiliated Lex and nearly killed him, Lex had already let himself fall into darkness and hate. He felt guilty because he couldn't say what he wanted to say, he should've told her that she wasn't the only one that felt something.

But just like with Lex and Lana, things got to where they were going. He found the courage to be honest with Lois, the courage to tell her how he really felt. Well, he didn't so much as tell her as much as he jammed his face into hers at the Daily Planet one night.

'_Definitely counts,' _he thought to himself.

He fiddled with his tie and tried to get his cufflinks to work properly, causing him to walk over to the mirror he kept up there. As he walked over, he found himself having a flashback of the day that he decided to make _this _day a reality.

_He found Lois crying in front of the mirror, her stuff was packed on top of the trunk, and she was still wearing that house-wife get-up. She was clutching what appeared to be his letterman's jacket before she looked up to see Clark standing in awe._

_"Oh umm...fa-false alarm," she told him. 'Yeah right,' he thought. He walked over towards her slowly, almost as if she was a bear that might jump up and attack him. He had never seen Lois like this, she was a mess with mascara running down her face._

_"You sure? Cause you seem kinda..."_

_She cut him off. "Kind of pathetic, right?" She stood and faced him, throwing his jacket and pulling off her necklace. "Why even bother going through the motions, Clark? This whole moving in together thing was a joke!" Clark didn't know what to do._

_"You're not yourself right now."_

_She just got more hysterical. "Come on! I'm not stupid! I could tell you just hated that burned brick of meat!"_

_He didn't want to lie, but he didn't want to make her feel worse. "Let's get you some water..."_

_"St..st...stop trying to sugarcoat it, Clark. I am NOT good for you, Clark. Chloe was right to protect you from me."_

_He couldn't help but feel some anger swell against his blonde friend. Lois was everything to him. "Chloe can be overprotecting sometimes."_

_Staring into her suitcase, she got very quiet. "No...She hit the target head on. She said I was gunna wreck us, and she's right. Clark, I don't...I don't know the first thing about...family time or dinners at home. I don't."_

_He shook his head. "Lois, I'm glad that you're opening up to me, but there's something else going on here."_

_"You're right. Something is going on. I've made a fool of myself long enough. It hurts me to be around you, I have to leave you Clark. Leave Smallville."_

_He knew it was whatever was affecting her that made her say it, but he felt a little part of his heart break all the same. He wasn't himself without her, and Smallville just wasn't Smallville without her. "Lois, you need to sleep on this, I promise things will look better in the morning."_

_"No, they won't. Clark, I'm a big girl, I can pull myself up by my own bootstraps, thank you very much. I'd hoped that I could pull it off, the whole, making a home thing." He darted towards the stairs to stop her, he couldn't let this happen. Not ever._

_"Lois, stop, you are home." You're my home._

_She turned, shaking her head again. "No, a home is for real. For always...and forever. Not this. Goodbye...Smallville."_

_He made his decision just then, a decision that would change his life for as long as he lived._

_"Lois, you can't leave. Not yet. I promise, we'll be together. Always and..."_

_"Forever?" she asked. She searched his face for an answer. "Do you mean it?"_

_He thought about it for a moment, but he knew the answer, he just had to say it out loud for the first time. "I do."_

"Clark! Get your buns of steel down here!" bellowed Chloe to snap Clark out of his thoughts. "If you're late for the rehearsal dinner, Lois is going to turn 'you may kiss the bride' into 'you may kill the groom', chop chop!" She was even more serious than Lois was during Chloe's wedding.

He straightened his tie again nervously. He'd get Chloe or Diana to help him with his cufflinks. He knew what his answer would be when the time came, he had known it since that day in the loft when he decided for the first time that he was going to spend the rest of his life with Lois Lane. He just had to say it out loud again. He knew his answer, no doubt about it, thats not why he was nervous. Public speaking just wasn't his thing. _Well, not without a cape._

"I do," he whispered to himself. Now he just had to say it in front of all their family and friends at the wedding tomorrow.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Does "Lois is going to turn 'you may kiss the bride' into 'you may kill the groom'" count as 'Kill Me or Kiss Me'? I hope so, haha, I liked that line too much to pass up on it and the other ideas seemed like too much of a 'going out of the way' thing otherwise. This of course leads up to the wedding that we had heard about in 'Martha', maybe I'll do a chapter that actually takes place during the wedding?

The idea here was that the three major 'firsts' in Lois and Clark's relationship happened in the loft. The first time he realized how important she was to him, the first time he realized how attracted he was to her, and the first time he realized he wanted to marry Lois Lane.

Anyways, feel free to hit the review button and tell me what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Bruce_.


	13. Bruce

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Why thank you, haha, I too feel like the look on his face and the way he said the words made me think that this was in fact the moment he decided to spend the rest of his life with Lois Lane. I like to think the other two moments were close to being the first times as well, I think he probably realized how important Lois was before the Harley scene but I think the 'Crimson' scene might have been at least one of the first times he realized that he was very much so attracted to Lois. As for the 'Bruce' chapter, wait no longer, enjoy below! haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I'm glad you liked her, I thought I'd throw in a quick cameo of our favorite Blonde (debatable if you prefer Ollie, lol).

_**A,sky**_ - Thank you!

_**katlynne**_ - I really like doing the flashbacks. It's so much fun to go in and think, "what were they thinking in that moment?" I hope you enjoy Bruce's chapter, I'm thinking about showing a lot more of the League in the future, especially when Bruce and Diana joined the group, I just have to find a way to work it around our little theme of 'Kill Me or Kiss Me' somehow. We'll find a way I suspect.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bruce/Chloe, tiniest bit of Oliver/Dinah

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #13, Bruce Wayne

**Author's Note:** This one should sound familiar if you've been paying attention so far! haha.

* * *

Clark was hanging his head, shaking it slowly, while Lois just looked perplexed.

"Oh come on! I would be the best baby sitter ever! Any kid you two have is going to be a little speedster! And who better than me, the Flash, to keep up with the little tyke? It's a match made in baby-sitting heaven!" explained Bart.

"Bart-" Clark began, but was once again cut-off.

"Who else are you going to let babysit? Ollie? Do you want your kid to be subjected to that much green? Don't tell me Bruce is going to. He would be terrible! He is the most serious guy I have ever met! Don't you know that kids like to have fun? Seriously!"

Dinah walked over and placed her hand on Bart's shoulder, giving him the "shut up" look she's had so much practice using on Oliver.

"I think it's obvious that if anyone should watch their baby, it'll be myself or Diana," she told him.

Clark's eyes shifted between Bart and Dinah. Lois continued to look perplexed.

"So that the kid has a bird fetish or turns into an Amazon Warrior baby? I don't think so!" Bart exclaimed.

Lois finally spoke up. "I'm not even pregnant."

"But you guys _are_ married, it's bound to happen sooner or later, I mean-"

Clark put his hand on Bart's shoulder, giving him a silent shake of his head.

"But-"

"Bart."

"Fine."

Bart grabbed his jacket off one of the chairs, putting it on and zipping it up in a flash.

"Don't blame me when your kid grows up to be a green, bird loving, axe wielding, humorless teenager," he told them with a huff before jetting out.

The couple and Dinah watched in awe. "Don't be too hard on him, he's just excited about the idea being an uncle," Dinah told them.

Clark nodded. "I won't."

Dinah shot him a funny look. "I was talking to Lois."

For the first time in quite some time, Lois began to laugh. She quickly punched Clark on the arm, "Yeah, Smallville. She was talking to me." Dinah just looked at the two with a smirk as she made her exit. '_I wonder if Oliver and I will ever be that couple-ly_'

After she left, Clark turned to Lois.

"I'm sorry about all of that, I was talking to Oliver on the com-sat and he made a joke about our kids playing together someday, and Bart was standing there, and he just wigged out about being Uncle Bobo or something? I don't know," Clark rambled.

Lois just smiled and laughed, holding her hand up."Don't worry, I know how he is. We don't even know-"

"Emil said I can."

Lois made a very surprised face. "Oh."

"I...we...it kinda...I was curious...you know...if I could...and uh, well...yeah...I can. But, I know how...that's not really your...you know...plan."

Lois couldn't think of what else to say, so she simply repeated, "Oh."

After a few moments of awkward silence, Lois spoke up. "You know, I kind of like the idea of having a kid. The farm needs a family."

Clark gave her a curious look, "Really?"

Lois immediately launched her self at Clark, wrapping her arms around his neck and partaking in quite the steamy kiss with her husband. Once Clark realized what was happening, he quickly matched her passion while wrapping his arms around her waist. Quickly, Lois started to kiss down to Clark's neck while lowering her hands to his chest to rip his shirt open, sending buttons flying all around them.

"Oh...right now?"

Lois smiled and once again muffled Clark's speech with a kiss, tackling him to the couch to take advantage of having Watchtower to themselves. But unbeknownst to the happy couple, they weren't about to be alone for long as another couple made their way into the building below.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

He shifted nervously under her gaze and continued into the elevator on their way to Watchtower. '_I should have never gave her access to the Bat Cave, I'm never going to hear the end of this,_' he thought to himself. Then he realized, '_Perfect_. _I just trapped myself in an elevator with her._'

"I was in the Cave. I saw it," she explained.

Bruce straightened his tie and gulped a little bit. He was not having this conversation, he was especially not having this conversation with his girlfriend. He didn't even like having this conversation with Alfred or Clark.

"Chloe, I'm not Clark. I don't do the whole, you know, _that_."

She was laughing at him, only she could make him this embarrassed. It must be her superpower.

"You have it in a display case! I couldn't miss it if I tried!"

"I do not wear underwear on the outside of my suit, Chlo," he said firmly.

She giggled at him. Last week when he was off with Dick and Oliver in Star City, she was wandering around the mansion and came across his little collection of superhero souvenirs in the Bat Cave. He wanted to explain that he was an orphan. That when you lose so much, it makes it that much harder to give things up but it felt too pathetic to say. He had a gray costume with navy blue underwear on the outside on display in the cave, not unlike Clark's suit.

"But you did," she said as they stepped out of the elevator.

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not times infinity."

Chloe laughed loudly at him, he had been spending far too much with with Dick and Tim. Before he could defend himself, they heard a noise inside. He immediately went into defensive mode and held out an arm to push Chloe behind him. Bruce crept inside and peered around, he didn't see anything out of the ordinary, but before he could relax, he head something disturbing.

"Oh god...Clark..."

Now, Bruce had seen a lot of things. Heard a lot of things. Being Batman, he had quite the collection of memories he'd prefer to forget. But really, hearing someone moan Clark Kent's name was right at the top of the list of things he never wanted to hear.

He looked back to Chloe, who had a very tight lipped smile going. He suspected that she was tight lipped because she was trying to contain her laughter, he also suspected that she wanted to catch them doing something they shouldn't be doing. Personally, he wanted to cough very loudly and get the hell out of dodge, but he knew how competitive Chloe and Lois were. She wasn't going to pass up getting some dirt on her cousin.

Chloe edged her way into Watchtower and peered around a few corners before waving Bruce over. He grimaced, not really wanting to see whatever it was they were about to see, but he knew better than to argue. He silently walked over, and that's when he saw it.

A tangled pile of limbs.

At least that's what it looked like to him. Clark was shirtless, on top of Lois, who was on the couch. Lois appeared to have most of her clothes on, which he found to be a little odd. Then he remembered the Christmas party last year and remembered that Lois usually initiated these kinds of things. If he knew Lois, she probably ripped open his shirt and jumped him the first chance they got to be alone.

"Is she trying to kill him or kiss him?"

"It looks like kill him via oxygen depravation from all the kissing," Chloe quipped. "Ahem!"

Both of them stopped and twisted their heads. They looked like two deer caught in the headlights. Clark immediately bounced over the back of the couch to hide his embarrassment while Lois simply glared at the two new faces.

"Do you mind?" she asked. "I'm trying to ravish my husband here."

Even Bruce had to laugh when he saw Clark's head pop over the back of the couch. His cheek were as red as Bart's new costume.

"Well, it's a good thing that's your motive, because if that was your attempt to kill him, I think you should know that Clark doesn't need to breath."

Lois shot her cousin a glare, but then began to smirk. "Trust me Chlo, I know exactly how Clark's powers tend to help certain situations."

Bruce couldn't help himself. He didn't care that he was the Dark Knight aka Mr. Serious as Chloe called him sometimes. He slapped his hands over his ears and starting to chant, "na-na-na-na-na-na" to himself over and over. And for a second, he swore he saw Clark super-speed out of the room.

* * *

**Author's Note:** You wanted it, you got it, haha. The infamous time when Chloe and Bruce caught Lois and Clark at Watchtower. I like to think that Clark is a bit on the shy side, so I wanted to make him embarrassed about the whole situation.

Now, I know some folks might say this was more a Bart story than a Bruce story. All I can really say is that originally, the chapter started with Bruce's first bit of dialogue and it was a short chapter. I decided to add in that opening piece to not only set-up the rest of this chapter, but a storyline that I'm working on for some future chapters. You'll have to stick around to find out what that might be, haha. Did anyone catch the Bart Allen call-back to another 'Baby Kent' story we all know and love? I'm still working on making _that _chapter happen. Let me know whatcha thought, shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _AU Lois_.


	14. AU Lois

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, thank you, and of course, you are very welcome!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Good, haha, Bobo has not made his last appearance, mark my words!

_**sunset**_ - I kind of knew as I was writing 'the Kents' that my Shelby scene might take place during that bath, haha. I intend to show a lot more Shelby in the future, he is too fun to leave out! haha. I think when you read my 'Oliver' chapter, you'll see just how much the group loves a 'League Baby', haha. A Christmas party chapter is in the works so you will get one, haha, the idea I have should pretty funny.

_**Gladius Grim**_ - I hope to have a lot of Bruce and Clark moments like that, haha.

_**cupcake51**_ - haha, I can't wait to write more!

_**tooblind**_ - Batman does wear underwear on the outside in the comics, but in the movies, he never does, it was just a little fun line, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - I think I might do a chapter for every member of the league, haha, look out for a Bart one!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #14, AU Lois

**Author's Note:** I came up with this one while I was pondering ideas for a potential 'Lionel Luthor' chapter. We look back on 'Luthor' and 'Apocalypse' in this one from Seasons 10 and 7 respectively. It's short and sweet, but I thought it suited this storyline. It's a bit different than what some folks were thinking, but your talk about Clark Luthor has given me a couple ideas to play with down the road. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**Clark thought back over the last few days, and his time spent on 'Earth-Two' as Lois had called it. He couldn't help but be even more thankful that he had been found by the Kents, if that was even possible.

"_I sometimes shudder to think what would have happened to my little traveler if he had been discovered in that cornfield by the first ignorant farmer that came along. Where on earth would you be now?_" _that_ Lionel had asked him. As if he could have ended up in any worse situation.

A part of him was truly scared of who he had become under the parenting of Lionel Luthor.

The thing that scared him more than anything was the way _that_ Lois had treated him. She had hated him in that other world. Every word, every look dripped with venom. He had come to rely on her warmth and love so much, he wasn't sure he'd have been able to survive if it hadn't found a way home.

"_The way you looked at me, Lois, it was so much hate. It was like you already formed your opinion about Clark Luthor, for good reason. He was a monster. I was a monster_," he had told her when he got home. He had missed her so much, and he never wanted to go back.

Tess was apparently his significant other in that world, and as much as he cared for his world's Tess, he knew she could be a cold person. As close as he had become with Lionel in his world, he knew that Lionel only stepped away from the darkness because of the Kents, both himself and Martha. Before that, he was not a good man, and it was no wonder that with a father like Lionel and a partner like Tess that Clark Luthor could have become a monster. It was the love and caring that he had gotten from the Kents and now Lois that had made him into the man he was today.

He had told Lois, _that_ Lois, that he couldn't live in a world where she didn't love him. And it was true.

It also made him think back to another alternate Lois. He had been so certain that he could save everyone and fix everything if he had never come to Earth in the first place, and he had nearly let Brainiac put that theory to the test. Luckily, his father had intervened and showed him that in a world without Kal-El, since there had been a Clark Kent, Lex and Brainiac brought the planet to it's knees.

In that world, he had never met Lois Lane. And when he did, there was none of their usual teasing and bickering. She had taken to him right away and she certainly had a thing for him. She even invited him on a date at one point if you can imagine that.

"_Talk about sweeping a girl off her feet_," she told him.

_That_ Lois seemed rather keen on jumping his bones. When he was changing into his fake reporter outfit, she had actually tried to peek at him. Lois Lane, a peeping tom, who woulda thunk it? But there she was, and Clark couldn't lie to himself, it certainly put a few thoughts in his head for when he got back to his real world where Lois Lane only wanted to be the bane of his existence. At least at that point in time.

Thinking back on it all, he was grateful that his Lois was somewhere in between. Those two Lois's were on each end of the extreme. Earth-Two Lois wanted to kill him and the Lois from the world where he never existed, well, she wanted to lock him a bedroom for a few days.

As much as the latter wasn't the worst possible way he could think of to spend time with Lois, he definitely preferred his Lois the most. She was completely unpredictable. He knew that she loved him entirely, but at the same time, he never knew what she was going to do to him.

He liked that.

His Lois didn't spend all day wanting to kill him or wanting to jump his bones. She wanted to do both.

He loved that.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Short and hopefully sweet? I wanted to do a little piece where we saw the two extremes (one wanted to kill, one wanted to kiss, get it?) and then show his Lois, who wants to do both at random times all day, everyday. When we first saw the Lois Lane from 'Apocalypse', I had hoped that this was the Lois Lane we'd meet someday. I feel like besides the occasional desire to kill Clark and their banter, we have.

I know it was a different than some folks were expecting, Clark Luthor is certainly someone I want to take a look at. I'm not sure that I buy into the idea that anyone is 'unredeemable', especially any version of Clark Kent. So that'll be something to think about. I have an idea for a Lois chapter similar to this, where it's all her thoughts. I know a lot of times, POV chapters feature a lot of 'I' and 'Me', but I think this kind of works too, doesn't it? If not, I'll make a better effort when I do the Lois chapter. You know how to let me know? Write a review!

**Next Up:** _Oliver_.


	15. Oliver

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! That's what I was hoping to hear, haha.

_**tooblind**_ - Happy New Years to you too! I'll probably do one with AU Lois' POV, it's a very intriguing idea.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks a ton!

_**sunset**_ - Yeah, Lois Lane is one of the more constant romantic interests you will find for a Superhero. A lot of Superhero's have a couple main love interests, but for the most part, it's almost always Lois for Superman. Occasionally you'll see Wonder Woman or Lana Lang, but really, once he gets to Metropolis and his story _really_ begins, you'll see Lois Lane right there to bust his chops and eventually fall in love with him.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Bruce/Diana, shades of Ollie/Dinah, shades of Chlark, shades of Chloe/Bruce

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Oliver Queen

**Author's Note:** So, here is the long awaited Oliver chapter, and I think some of you are really going to like it. There is some angst in the middle, but it will pay off in the end I suspect. Are there enough pairings? hahaha. Hope you guys like it!

* * *

Oliver looked around proudly at the party. Jo'an was turning seven and he had the honor of organizing her little shindig in the barn at the Kent Farm. Bruce was in charge of watching her and keeping her busy, so Ollie got to do all the major party stuff.

'_Suck on that, Batboy_' he thought with a smirk.

Truth be told, he was actually really good friends with Bruce. Not as close as he and Clark were, but still great friends. They just got a tad bit competitive when it came to Clark's daughter Jo'an. They both had their eyes set on the crown of 'her favorite Uncle.'

He looked across the party to see AC showing some of the kids how to bob for apples, Ollie had no intention of letting that go without a tease later. Bart was trying to explain to Kara that she wasn't supposed to use her x-ray vision when she was trying to open a pinata. Zatanna was doing simple parlor tricks for some kids near the front of the barn, getting plenty of 'ooh's and 'aww's in the process. It looked like Bruce and Diana were going toe-to-toe with Dinah and J'onn in a three legged race.

'_Why are the adults playing all of the games?_' he thought to himself.

It was good for them to have times like these though. They spent so much time saving the world that they rarely got to be part of the world. This was a good moment for them as a group, and it's not like Jo'an invited that many kids from school. Lois made her invite half the kids here.

"_But then we can't do anything fun!" _she had told her mother. "_I don't want to hide our powers all night!_"

He knew how much she loved racing with her Uncle Bobo or arm wresting with her Aunt Diana. He looked back to the race in progress when he thought of her and saw that both her and Bruce had taken a tumble. They laughed and shared a quick kiss before getting up.

To be honest, he was surprised that Bruce had moved on so quickly from Chloe. They dated for even longer than he and Chloe had. Oliver always suspected that the reason Chloe got together with Bruce was because Bruce wasn't really the couple type. He made a lot of strides with Diana because they were so similar in so many ways, both dedicated to Justice first and foremost. But at the time, Bruce was someone that Chloe could be with and not have to worry about things getting so complicated. Unlike when she was with him.

Just then, Jo'an walked over to the Emerald Archer and tugged on his pocket.

"Hey there, Joey. Having fun?"

She smiled up at him and nodded.

"That's my girl. What are you up to?"

"I gotta ask you something."

Oliver hoisted her up into his arms, setting her on his hip. "Shoot."

"And you can't lie to me."

Oliver smiled before nodding.

"How come you and Aunt Chloe aren't together?"

Oliver looked at her in shock. '_Geeze. Can Kryptonians read minds toos?_'

"What would make you think about that?"

Jo'an made a thoughtful look. "I heard her and Mommy talking about it this morning. Mommy was telling her that maybe you guys could try again now that Uncle Bruce is with Aunt Diana and you and Aunt Dinah aren't together, but Aunt Chloe said that you probably wouldn't want to."

He wasn't sure what to say so he took a few moments to gather his thoughts. "Sometimes, two people decide that you're better as friends, Joey. Sometimes, you work better like that."

Jo'an scowled at him a bit, mumbling "Grown ups," to herself, but he barely even noticed as he thought back to the day that he broke up with Chloe.

_Oliver was pacing around Watchtower while Chloe sat on the couch. Chloe had been infected by red meteor rock and had made quite the scene over the last few hours. In addition to making more than a few attempts at jumping Clark's bones, she had said some very hurtful things to both Lois and Oliver. _

_She had told Lois that she didn't deserve her life at the Daily Planet or with Clark, and she told Oliver he was always going to be second best._

_"You know that I didn't mean those things."_

_Oliver was heartbroken of the whole matter. "You told me before what this stuff does. It makes you do what you really want. No inhibitions. Of course, at the time it was Clark and Lois that you were making fun of. Now what? Now suddenly it makes you say things you don't mean? Or does it make you say things you didn't mean to say? Because there is a difference, Chlo."_

_Deep down, he did feel a little in Clark's shadow. How could he not? Clark could do these amazing things. He was in a completely different league than the rest of the team. And then there was Lois. Sure, he was over Lois, had been for a long time. But she did turn him down for Clark way back when. But things were great between the three of them now. Clark was his best friend and Lois was a great friend of his. No doubt about it._

_But when your girlfriend calls you a little leaguer, and that you can't compare to Clark Kent, that definitely brings old stuff up._

_"Oliver, you know that I love you."_

_Oliver stops and turns on her. "But you love Clark more? Dammit, Chloe, I thought we were past this?"_

_"Just because there is a small part-"_

_"No, it's not small. Me and Lois? That's small. I would still pick you. I know I would. If you dosed me with it, I know that what I truly want, is you, and even if you added up all the small feelings in the world I might have for other people, it would still be you."_

_Chloe went silent for a few minutes while Oliver began to pace again._

_"You know that it's hard for me to move on when I'm always around them. When I see what they have."_

_Oliver closed his eyes. This was what was breaking his heart._

_"That is the problem, Chloe. You keep talking about what they have. What Lois has with Clark. You keep talking about it, longing for that life you had in the past that you can't even see what's going on in the present. I feel all those feelings for you that Clark feels for Lois. That could be our future, but you're too busy living in regret and longing for that old life instead of moving forward with me."_

_Wiping away a tear that got away, Oliver continued._

_"I wanted this to work. I waited for you, Chlo. I searched and searched for you. I couldn't live with myself knowing that you traded your life for mine. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But you can't let the past go and I can't stay in the past with you. I want to move forward with you, but you aren't willing to do that. Not with me," he told her._

_Chloe wiped away her tears, "Please."_

_"I'm sorry. I...I can't do this anymore."_

He had walked out that day and did his best to never look back. He started to see Dinah, Chloe had started to see Bruce. They became friends again after a while just as he had with Lois and Mercy, but deep down he knew that it was different. They were both happy with their other relationships, but deep down they both knew that they had missed a chance at something truly special and it disappeared that day.

"Uncle Ollie!"

Snapping him from his thoughts, Oliver looked down at his niece.

"What's wrong Joey?"

She rolled her eyes and folded her arms, making him smile. "You aren't listening to me."

Oliver laughed and gave her a face to continue. "Aunt Chloe looks bored, you should go talk to her."

He looked to where Jo'an was pointing, and he saw Chloe sitting by herself towards the back of the barn watching the party go on without her. He gave his niece a nod and put her down before walking over to where the Blonde was sitting. He sat down beside her and took a drink from his cup.

"Well, you're the life of the party, aren't you?" he joked.

Chole smiled at him softly. "Just thinking is all."

"Penny for your thoughts?"

She gave him a long look, almost as if she was wondering whether or not to invite him into her little world. She sighed and let out a chuckle before filling him in on her little secret. "I look around at all of this, and I wonder sometimes if Jo'an would've had a cousin to play with by now."

He was not expecting that.

"I doubt you want to hear about this-" she started.

"If she did, I bet her cousin would kick some serious butt at Apple Archery."

Chloe looked up at him with a smile. "Yeah, I think so too."

Oliver wasn't sure what to make of this moment. Since Bruce and Chloe had broken up, the two of them had become a bit closer. They talked more, they were hanging out more. Lois had mentioned to him that the reason they broke up had to do with Chloe wanting more than what Bruce had to offer. Bruce just wasn't at that place in his life where he felt that he could have anything but Batman at the top of his priority list. That's why Diana suited him so well.

Chloe had been involved in the Superhero Game longer than anyone not named Clark Kent it seemed. She was ready to have more than that, she wanted what Lois and Clark had: a family. Something to come home to, not just a consistent dinner date. For once, she was ready to move forward.

"Look, Ollie-" she began, but was cut off.

"Alright everybody, this little munchkin would like to do some dancing!" called Dick Grayson over the sound system. There were cheers all around. "And for her first dance? We are calling the one, the only...Bobo to the dance floor!"

Bart rolled his eyes and walked out to the middle of the dance floor where Jo'an was standing with her arms folded. A slowish song came over the speakers and the two began to dance while other couples joined them. Oliver stood up from his seat and extended a hand.

"Well, I'm going to warn you, I've been getting a little rusty...but would you care to dance?" he asked.

Chloe smiled her old wide smile, something Oliver hadn't seen in quite some time, before taking his hand and joining him in a dance. They began to sway slowly to the music, and after a while, Chloe looked up at him with a hint of vulnerability in her eyes.

"I know that-"

"How about for tonight, we just dance? Tomorrow, we can worry about the rest?" he asked.

Chloe smiled and planted a soft kiss on his lips before returning her head to his chest. They continued dancing for quite some time. They didn't even realize that the song had changed to a much faster song that had Bart and Jo'an teaching Kara how to do the Chicken Dance.

Lois stood against Clark in the loft with his arms wrapped around her front, watching their respective best friends dancing.

"Were we ever that lost?" she asked her husband.

Clark smiled softly and planted a kiss on her head. "No, we knew all along...well, I knew all along."

He said it so casually. Almost as if he didn't mean to say it _that _way, but the look on his face that she couldn't see showed the truth. He knew exactly what he was doing and when he felt her take in a deep breath and wrench herself from his grip, he knew it had worked.

"And what the hell does that mean?"

Putting on an innocent face, he pretended to be surprised. "I'm just saying, I knew a little bit before you did is all."

Lois looked on in shock. "I knew waaaaaaaaay before you did, Smallville."

"I don't think so, Sweetie."

"Whe...whe...when did you know?"

Clark thought to himself before answering. "The day you left Smallville. The first time. After I got you into Met-U."

Lois smirked and put her hand on her hip. "Well, I knew the day that I dunked you in that stupid water tank."

"Well, I actually knew it the first time I saved you. From the crazy plastic surgeon? I just didn't want to make you feel like a damsel in distress."

Lois huffed. "Well, to be honest, I knew it when I hit your naked ass with my car. I just didn't want to embarrass you."

"Embarrass me how? Sounds like you liked what you saw," he said with a smirk.

As the two of them went at it, Jo'an watched during her dance with her Bobo. Her Mommy and Daddy were going to kill each other. Then she looked over towards the back of the barn and saw her Aunt and Uncle holding each other close and sharing a kiss as they swayed during their dance.

'_Maybe that's what love is,_' she thought to herself with a smile. '_Sometimes you want to kill each other. Sometime you want to kiss each other silly._'

Thinking about it for a moment, she made her decision. "Grown ups are stupid," she said as she turned back to Bobo and their dance.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Time for me to fess up, haha. Originally, I planned for Oliver's chapter to be set during 'Bride' when he talks to Lois. But I didn't like the way it came out. I also was planning on putting Chloe and Bart together, but my inner Chlollie fan won me over after watching 'Escape' again, which inspired the big fight between Oliver and Chloe that we see above. Sometimes, I think it's good to show the realistic side of relationships where things don't always click and it's happily ever after. Sometimes it can be rough waters. Sometimes it takes breaking up and finding each other again, like Chloe and Oliver do here.

I love getting to write Jo'an again. I hope it was true to the character, I ran it by mygyps17 to get approval. Anyways, I had a lot of fun writing it, hopefully you had a lot of fun reading it. Tell me what you thought via review!

**Next Up:** _The Daily Planet_.


	16. The Planet

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - Fire is a perfect way to describe it, haha. I too try and stick to the comics, but in recent comics, Oliver Queen and Dinah Lance have broken up (at least the last that I read, which was a little bit ago) so I figured why not make some of the fans happy, haha. We'll see plenty of both pairings and comics stuff, so it'll be fair for the most part I think. As for the amount of Chlollie vs. Clois, read the comments down in the Author's Note, should answer some questions. I'm really happy you enjoyed the other chapters, and Jo'an will be seen again, I promise you, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Like I said above, you have not seen the last of Jo'an Lane Kent, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Thanks! I love Jo'an too, I've always imagined their child being a mini-Lois and chaos would ensue from then on! haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Check out my Author's Note down below, I totally respect that opinion, no worries, haha. You'll get that chapter, and hopefully you'll see where I was coming from once you read that AN.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, the Daily Planet

**Author's Note: **Well, I'm excited about this next chapter. This was the chapter that inspired the 'if walls could talk' series of chapters. Rather than spoil anything, I'm just going to let you guys read it yourselves. I hope you enjoy it at least half as much as I enjoyed writing it.

BTW, the scenes are from 'Crimson', 'Idol', and 'Isis' respectively.

**

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**

If these walls could talk, they'd tell the greatest story ever told.

The first time the Daily Planet met Clark Kent, he was just some bumbling farm boy. Hardly a story worth telling.

But this farm boy was not what he appeared to be. In fact, he seemed to be a quite the story. He always came in asking Chloe Sullivan, one of the many junior reporters at the time, to research some strange story. Usually about the meteor infected, but other times it would have to do with things regarding a 'Krypton' or a 'Zoner' or a 'Brainiac'. At first, it was all just greek to the Daily Planet, but eventually, the pieces all seemed to fit together.

Clark Kent was actually 'Kal-El', an alien from the planet Krypton. He was some kind of hero or vigilante, depending on who you asked, who was rather keen on keeping the world safe from Kryptonian related beings and meteor infected persons gone bad.

But that wasn't the story that had the Planet tuning in each week to listen for. No, the story that it was most interested in was not Clark Kent, but actually Clark Kent and Lois Lane. You see, Lois Lane was Chloe Sullivan's cousin and at first, Clark Kent's nemesis.

It remembered the time their story showed up in it's halls as if it was only yesterday.

_"Lois is...into me."_

_Chloe looked at him with a smirk more often found on her cousin. __"She's...into you? What...like...?"_

_Instead of explaining, Clark simply pulled the cd that Lois made for him out of his back pocket and gave it to Chloe. _

_"Wow. She really pulled out all the stops."_

_"She's not herself, alright? It's like she overdosed on Love Potion #9 or something-"_

_Chloe couldn't contain her laughter any longer._

_"And this isn't funny!"_

_"It's pretty funny," she laughed. _

_"Chloe, we have to find out what happened before she strikes again."_

_Behind Clark, Chloe could see that Lois had arrived to do just that. "Too late."_

_Hands on her hips, Lois made her presence known. "There you are! I have been searching all over for you. Look what I got."_

_Lois pulled her shirt over to reveal a fresh tattoo on her chest emblazoned with 'Lois & Clark Forever' on it. Needless to say, Clark's eyes bugged out of his head and Chloe's eyebrows shot up into her bangs. "Maybe you can get one to match?" Lois had asked Clark._

_Clark turned to Chloe with a desperate look, finally she had realized the severity of the situation._

_"I...I...I think you're right about that story, I'm going to look into it," she told Clark before making her escape._

_"Uh...Chloe!" he shouted as he went to chase her, but Lois intervened, twirling herself in front of him._

_"Hi you," she told him, caressing his face._

_He began to pull her out of the office by the hand when she threw him into the phone booth near by._

_"You can pour on the modesty all you want, Smallville. It only makes you that much more adorable."_

The story only got juicier from there. Next thing you know, Clark has Lois up on the roof and they are leaping buildings in a single bound. Not exactly what you would expect from a simple Smallville farm boy. This simply made the Daily Planet that much more keen on seeing what happened next.

After a while, Lois managed to talk Clark into getting a job as a Copy Boy. Lois, of course, had gotten a job there about three or four years ago when Grant Gabriel was the editor. Clark quickly exposed a plethora of different abilities like super-speed, super-breath, x-ray vision, great strength, the whole nine yards as an employee. Not that any of the reporters seemed to notice, just the Daily Planet itself.

But more than any of those moments, the Daily Planet's favorite moment was when Lois 'manned up' as Jimmy Olsen once said. Apparently there had been some drama after their first real kiss in the bullpen, and Clark was unsure of Lois' feelings towards him.

_She twirled around in her chair, eyeing Clark's back with interest. "Let's see what you've got."_

_He turned to her, putting on a pair of glasses and a smirk. "I'm a bit near-sighted."_

_Lois looked up at him in a combination of surprise and shock._

_"I've been trying not to wear them," he said._

_She stood and walked over to him, "They're very...", Lois put them on and gave him a funny look, "...Clark Kent."_

_He eyed the glasses and then her, not quite knowing if that was a bad thing or a good thing._

_"I guess you're not the only one that's a bit short-sighted. It's just sometimes I feel like I see a whole different side of you than anyone else-"_

_"Lois."_

_"It's ok. It's my hero complex to resolve, I take the nicest guy I know and I weigh him down with all this shining armor."_

_Clark smiled to himself. 'If she only knew,' he thought._

_"And it's not fair. Nobody can be two different people."_

_Something about the look on her face made him say it. "I wish I could."_

_She gave him a funny look._

_"Is this your long winded way of saying that you hate these?" he asked._

_She bit her lip and quirked her jaw. "Personally, I don't mind the bump in your geek factor, but professionally, there are these new fangled things you can try, they're called contacts." They shared one of their electric looks before Clark decided to speak up._

_"It means a lot that you thought I had it in me."_

_She hesitated for a moment, considering how to approach that statement, but decided to go with the classic moves. She gave him a quick punch in the arm and then a tease, "Don't worry, Smallville. I'll only call you four-eyes every once in a while."_

_Walking away, she could practically feel him being let down behind her. Suddenly, a burst of courage whipped through her._

_'I'm going to get it right with this one,' she thought to herself._

_Turning around, "But just so you're clear on one thing," she said. She kicked a pack of newspapers his way. They landed squarely between his own feet and she began to race towards him. Stepping on the stack and grabbing him, Lois kissed him with everything she had._

Now things were really cooking. Pretty soon, Lois had realized who Clark really was: the mysterious Red Blue Blur she'd been so fond of. Suddenly, their little Love Triangle for Two became a good old fashioned love story. Not that Clark knew that.

He just puttered along with the weight of the world on his shoulders, not realizing that the woman he loved already knew his secret and was completely ok with it and capable of protecting it. I guess even though he's exceeded many of their normal standards, he was still just a dumb farm boy. That was until he too 'manned up' and decided to take the plunge, spilling his guts to the far prettier reporter in their little dynamic-duo.

_Watching Lois walk away, he knew what he had to do. If he was going to make this work, he had to make the leap. He had to make the leap for them._

_"All my life, I've been afraid Lois. Afraid of people knowing the truth about me. Afraid of them rejecting me, and even if they didn't, still losing them. I've been afraid of everything I can't control," he explained as those elevator doors opened. _

_He had to stop her, he had to tell her the truth._

_"But when I was faced with the idea of losing you forever, I realized there is something I would regret more than anything else. And it's not telling you the truth about me," he said. __Now that he was finally saying it, he couldn't stop himself. _

_Lois just looked on, frozen in place, not wanting to speak or move for fear that he would stop._

_"Cause that's the only way we could share a life together. Now, I know the odds are stacked against us and we'd be risking everything. But if you're ready to take that leap, there's no one else I wanna take that leap with," he told her. He knew he had her won over the moment those elevator doors closed. _

_He turned away, trying to find the words. "Lois, you've had a lot of questions about the Blur. It's me."_

_She smiled a wide smile. He was finally telling her the truth she had known for so long._

_"I'm the Blur."_

_Lois full on sprinted towards him, knocking them both into a few bags of decorations from an office-party a few weeks prior. Kissing him with everything she had, she wanted to show him how much this meant to her. How much he meant to her._

_"What took you so long?" she asked._

_Clark didn't know what to do, he just looked up in shock. "What? You-"_

_Lois covered his lips with a finger, then with a kiss._

With that one speech, things changed around here forever. Both of their spirits were uplifted in a time of darkness and chaos. They quickly moved up the staff ladder and were two of the best reporters that the Planet had to offer, not that their paychecks indicated that. Perry White had become editor, a good friend of theirs apparently, and had promised if they got one big story that they'd be up in the big leagues.

"You got it, Chief" they had told him.

But even Perry couldn't have seen this story coming. The Planet thought back to the most recent 'event' in the Lois and Clark story.

_"There's a huge fire downtown!" one of the interns called throughout the bullpen._

_In all of the havoc, none of the reporters noticed Lois Lane and Clark Kent exchange a quick look. They must have communicated telepathically because neither said a word, yet both knew what the other one was thinking. While the other reporters ran to the stairs and raced up to the street, Lois and Clark boarded the elevator holding hands. No one seemed to notice that Lois was gripping Clark's hand to keep it from shaking._

_As the doors closed, he looked to Lois. "Are you sure?"_

_With a small smile, she gripped his shirt and ripped it open to expose a large red 'S' over a blue suit. __"I'm sure."_

_Clark quickly rid himself of the rest of his clothes, revealing a blue suit with a red cape. He was checking the pockets of his pants and jacket before he looked up at Lois with a nervous look. "I think I forgot my mask..."_

___He braced himself for her to kill him, but instead she just giggled and kissed him. _"Let's try something. Push your hair back." _Clark used his super-strength to get his hair to brush back to take on a new appearance, but Lois quickly stopped him. _

_"Ok, part it this way instead now. Ok, now take a little bit right here, and twist it down," she instructed._

_He did as he was told, and a small curl fell to the right side of his forehead._

_"How do I look? Can you tell it's me?" he asked her. __She smiled at him and gave him another quick kiss._

_"Of course I can, but they won't, Smallville. You look...super. Now go before I get to the ground floor, you have a fire to put out."_

_He smiled brightly at her, and quickly flew up through the roof of the elevator and soon the roof of the building. She had managed to make it out to the street just in time to see him fly out from the roof without anyone noticing. He then flew down a few stories so that the reporters below could see him._

_"What was that?"_

_"A bird?"_

_"A plane?"_

_"A man?"_

_"Hawkman?"_

_Lois smiled at the sounds around her as her Smallville went to go be a hero. A beckon of hope for the city of Metropolis. _

_"No, that's Superman," she told a bystander. And just like that, she had her headline._

The next day, Lois Lane turned in her story 'My Night with Superman' to her editor Perry White. Superman had given her his first exclusive interview, and he only did interviews with Lois Lane of the Daily Planet. Needless to say, that was the day that Clark Kent and Lois Lane left the bullpen behind them forever and became the top reporters for the great metropolitan newspaper. And if the Daily Planet had to guess, this was just the beginning.

Yep. If these walls could talk, they'd tell the greatest story ever told.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you think? I thought it came together pretty well. A bit long, but I don't think that's a bad thing, haha. The Kill Me or Kiss Me moment was when he thought she'd kill him for forgetting the mask. I've always wondered why he didn't use a mask, the whole glasses thing has always been funny to me in a 'why would they think that would work?' way. This is my personal interpretation of how he ended up going maskless, haha.

Hope you guys liked it, it was a lot of fun writing the 'big reveal to the world' scene.

Ok, now I wanna take a moment and address that last chapter, 'Oliver'. I knew going in that it was probably not nearly enough Clois, but like I said before, there were two ideas I had for Oliver's chapter. One took place during 'Bride' and then I had an idea about Lois and Clark arguing about who '_knew_' first that they were meant to be. When I was trying to figure out what would inspire such an argument, I had the idea about them watching a '_lost_' couple that finally knew. Oliver and Chloe seemed perfect for the job. It was a very short chapter, and after I tried to write out a timeline for the chapters to exist in, I started to think about what would have had to happen for Chloe and Oliver to break up, and that was what I came up with and it just seemed to fit.

So yes, I know that it was a lot of Chlollie and not much Clois. And I was worried about that, and considered just doing a one-shot for it. But as we get into the late-teens here, I think we're going to have to open ourselves up to some chapters like the 'Oliver' chapter. Especially if I'm going to keep up the pace I've been working at. I still intend to do the 'Bride' chapter, it's got some moments that I really like, it just needs to be fine-tuned.

Well, anyways, let me know what you thought of 'the Planet' via review!

**Next Up:** _Emil Hamilton_.


	17. Emil

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Oh believe me, haha, the Talon is on the list of 'if walls could talk' chapters! haha.

_**MegasaurusRed101**_ - Well then, continue on down from here and enjoy the next one! haha.

_**bridj26**_ - Thanks!

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - Another Browncoat, eh? haha. Writing this story is getting me over the hiatus myself, I can't believe we have to wait until the end of the month to see what was up with that little pyramid in the sand thing!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Aww! You're always so nice to me! haha. I really liked the idea that _his_ Lois was the one, so it all fit together well I thought. I actually just got the final chapter from mygyps17 for the Jo'an chapter and I'll give you a tease, there is a lot of Bobo and Jojo! haha. I'm glad that you liked 'the Planet' so much! It's up there with my favorite chapters so far!

_**sunset**_ - The key for Chloe, and I guess those of you that want your own Clark, haha, is that sometimes we're blinded by what someone else represents and can't see that we might already have it right in front of us. That's what I was going for with Chloe and Oliver, haha. Oliver is her _Clark_, she just couldn't see it because she was so busy pining after Clark himself. mygyps17 has been unbelievably nice, and like I was telling LoisNClark4Ever, I have the final copy of the Jo'an Chapter, I just have to figure out when to post it now since we had a Jo'an-esque chapter so recently!

It was odd to me to see his feelings come back, but I guess not entirely out of place. Ollie's life has been so crazy lately, I'm not entirely surprised that when he hit the reset button and went back to Hero-Mode that he wanted to restart his romance with Lois, she is pretty awesome, haha. I'm just happy that they were able to move past it and are now good friends again. I thought about doing a whole new story for it, but at the time, I really needed a 'sappy' chapter to slot in after Shelby but before Bruce, so it forced my hand, haha.

I intentionally went for a non-infected 'Crimson' scene because I'm going to try and include more of the 'less used' scenes from popular episodes, just to see what I can come up with. Though what scenes have been used more than the one from 'Idol' and 'Isis'? haha, foot in mouth. I'm glad you liked the big reveal, there will be more Superman revealing (hey, get your mind out of the gutter, hahaha) in my next chapter. Hope you like 'Emil'!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #17, Emil Hamilton

**Author's Note:** So, I went out and got special permission to do this, hope you enjoy it!

* * *

"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU CLARK KENT! KRYPTONITE IN YOUR FOOD DEAD!"

Clark looked in fear from Lois to Emil and back, "Lois, sweetie, why-"

"BECAUSE YOUR KRYPTONIAN SPAWN IS TRING TO BURST OUT OF ME LIKE THAT SCENE IN 'ALIEN'!"

"Lois, sweetie, how are you holding up?"

Lois suddenly calmed and smiled at her new visitor. "Mrs. K! How are you?"

Martha smiled at Lois. She knew better than to buy into that showing, you could hear her in the parking lot. "I'm fine, dear, how are you?"

"I'm wonderful! And Clark is wonderful! And Emil is wonderful! And the Doctor is wonderful-"

Emil muttered to himself, "I'm the doctor."

"And the baby is wonderful! And everything is just wonderful!" Lois felt a contraction coming on, so she changed up her game plan. "Actually, Mrs. K, do you think you could do me a tiny, little, itty-bitty favor?"

Martha rushed over to the bedside, "Of course dear, anything."

Lois smiled warmly at her mother-in-law. "Do you think you could get me some ice-chips? I hear they help."

"Of course, I'll be right back," she told her. Lois managed to hold herself together until the lock clicked in the door. "YOU ARE A DEAD MAN, FARMBOY!"

Outside of the room, the group shuddered at Lois' screams. The various members of the Justice League were on-site and had assembled a make-shift waiting room directly outside of their room out of fear of actually being inside the room with the monst-, I mean Lois.

J'onn Jo'nzz was currently chomping on some Choco's while Arthur Curry and Bart Allen played cards. Oliver Queen was closest to the door, but currently had his head between knees while Dinah Lance rubbed his back in comfort. Kara Kent was just arriving when she took in the scene.

"What's wrong with Ollie?" she asked anyone willing to answer. Bart snorted in the corner, Dinah grimaced as Oliver's head shot up. Oliver had a piece of kleenex jammed up each nostril and a look of pure fear on his face. Kara's eye widened in surprise.

"Don't go in there, Kara. Promise me you won't get in there," he plead with her.

Dinah pushed his head back down and looked up at Kara, "He asked Lois if it was really necessary to be that loud."

J'onn spit out half a cookie in laughter, but a loud shriek from Lois ended any more of laughter for anyone else.

"And I thought her Silver Banshee days were over," quipped Chloe.

Back in the room, Lois had Emil by his tie. "I want more. Now."

"Lois, it's not safe-"

"I have a Kryptonian child inside of me that's on the verge of kicking through my stomach like David Beckham, Doc. If you don't give me drugs...now...I'm thinking you're going to have to call another doctor, and by that, I mean one for you," she told him with a fierce glare.

Clark tried to step in and save Emil, "Lois, I think-", but Lois threw him her patented '_shut your face_' look at he stepped back.

"Now, are we going to have a problem, Doc?"

Emil gulped.

"I can't give you anymore, Lois. I've already given you twice as much as I give normal patients."

Lois smiled sweetly at her husband and motioned him over to her. Grabbing his jacket, she wrenched him down to their level.

"Do you see the size of his head, Doc? Well? Do you?"

Emil nodded. Clark grimaced, he knew what was coming next.

"That's coming out of me. And it's at least three times bigger than a normal. So, by my logic, I get three times the drugs. Get...me...more...now."

With that, she push both of them away from her. As Emil hit the floor, Martha Kent walked into the room with a look of surprise. She looked first at Lois, who was smiling sweetly as if Emil had slipped on a wet spot. When she looked at Clark, he was shaking his head frantically.

"I...have your...ice chips, dear."

Lois smiled brightly. "Oh, Mrs. K, you're the best!"

Clark just frowned at his wife. '_I have seen Lois shift moods before, but this is a whole new level of crazy._' He couldn't help but gulp and watch her a little extra closer after that thought and prayed silently that she couldn't read his mind, she didn't appear able to '_whew, that was close_.'

Before they could say anything else, Emil announced to them that the baby was coming. Clark rushed to the door and told the rest of the group that the baby was coming and then rushed back into the room. The group was completely silent at his announcement.

"We drawing straws to see who films it?" asked Bart.

Not much later, Lois was holding a baby girl in her arms and Clark was smiling a smile that his face shouldn't have been able to hold. Oliver and Chloe were named the god-parents of the little tyke, something that Ollie had already taken the opportunity to rub in Bruce Wayne's face a few dozen times. Sam Lane and Martha were standing near by, eagerly waiting to hold their grandchild for the first time.

Behind the group was Dick Grayson, who was still holding an icepack against his forehead. Turns out that Lois _didn't_ want to have the birth of their child filmed after all. But Clark did promise to by him a new camera, what with the first one having been shattered against Dick's forehead.

After the baby was born, Lois kept jumping back and forth between her emotions. She'd smack him, telling him how much it had hurt. Then she'd pull him into a lip-crushing kiss, telling him how happy she was. Then she'd punch him. Then hug him in a way that he knew would crush a normal person. Luckily she was in the middle of one of her happy moods, he took this moment to ask the question everyone else was wondering.

"What are we going to name her?" Clark asked.

Lois thought to herself for a few moments before smiling up at her husband.

"Jo'an."

Clark smiled back. He loved it. "Like your middle name?"

Shaking her head, Lois explained, "No, like your fathers."

"My fathers?"

"J-O from Jor-El and A-N from the end of Jonathan."

Clark almost teared up. Almost. The Man of Steel does not tear up. Not in front of Oliver Queen and Chloe Sullivan he doesn't.

"Lois, you don't have to do that."

Lois gave him a soft kiss. "Jonathan Kent was the second best man I've ever known..." Clark gives her a confused look, "...second to my own husband, of course. I'm honored to name her after him, Clark." He couldn't help it, he had to kiss her.

He pulled back to look at his wife, and he couldn't help but think she was an angel despite the copious amounts of sweat. Then he looked at his little baby girl, Jo'an, and he could feel his heart swell with pride and love. This was his family, and he was the happiest man in the world.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I wanted the beginning to be funny and the end to be sappy, haha. Did I pull it off? Of course, the character of Jo'an belongs to the wonderful mygyps17 and I got special permission to use her and the explanation of her name in this one. Like myself, I know that many of my readers are big fans of her story 'You Make Daddy Sick', so I couldn't help but ask if I could use that little bundle of trouble as _my_ Lois and Clark's first born.

Also, I know that there probably wasn't nearly enough Emil in it to be an 'Emil' chapter, but I tried to give him the most non-Clois lines, so hopefully it's be acceptable, haha. He is a hard one to craft a story around, so hopefully this is up to your standards!

We had ourselves a few references in this one. The 'Alien' one was pretty obvious, the Chest-Burster scene. Martian Manhunter is addicted to Choco's cookies in the comics, and I was thinking about 'Knocked Up' when I wrote Oliver's line. Lois turned into the Silver Banshee in 'Escape'.

**Next Up:** _Jonathan Kent_.


	18. Jonathan

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad you liked it! I've been trying to get creative with how to do chapters so that they don't get too much of the same, so it's great that you and others have enjoyed the Location chapters as well. I've got some 'Holiday' chapters ahead, so hopefully they can be equally as enjoyable! He is very different than the comics, haha, I almost have to forget everything I know about him when I write him.

_**PSB**_ - Thanks! I think about those first few days at the Daily Planet, and them walls had to have been like "wtf?" haha.

_**lilbit4**_ - I'm glad you liked it! She'll be back around in future chapters, I promise. Including Chapter 19, so make sure to swing back by!

_**sunset**_ - I'll be honest, I was nervous about it being so similar, but I couldn't imagine them all _not _being there, you know? I love names like 'sweetie' and 'honey' because in my experience, they are almost always used when someone is trying to get out of trouble, haha. I suppose Clark has adopted that same thought process, haha. I'm really happy mygyps17 is letting me do that, I love the character of Jo'an too. I hadn't thought about it like that, but you're totally right about Lollie and I should do a chapter covering his feelings and/or lingering feelings.

As odd as it is that no one asked her out, I can't say I'm unhappy about it, haha. From the second she showed up in Season 4, I was addicted to the Lois and Clark pairing, haha. I was _this _close to letting myself liking the Lana and Clark pairing towards the end Season 3, let myself enjoy it while it lasted, but one scene into Season 4, I was muttering how I wished Clark should have been just a couple seconds later so we could just put Lana in the past, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I like to think that each one of them tried to go inside the room, but they learned their lesson real quick. And Kara learned from seeing Oliver in such a state, haha. Jojo and Bobo will have their fun in the next chapter, I'm glad you liked it! haha. I've kind of put myself on the hook now where it'll have to be Jo'an whether I like or not (I love it, haha) because of earlier chapters. Hope you enjoy Jonathan's chapter!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents, tiniest shade of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #18, Jonathan Kent

**Author's Note: **I promised a Jonathan Kent chapter, here is a Jonathan Kent chapter, haha. Scenes from 'Pilot' and 'Gone' in this one. Also, I don't normally do this, but I'll recommend a song to go along with this chapter. "One More Day" by VAST was playing in the background while I was writing this, I was intending for the scene from 'Lazarus' to be in this one before I went with the original scene instead, so I was rewatching it.

Just a thought, the lyrics don't completely fit, but the chorus does a little bit. I dunno, just throwing it out there.

* * *

'_That's my son,_' he thought to himself.

Jonathan watched Clark from the back of the room. He was so proud of him, of the man he had become. Not a day goes by that he didn't regret not being there for Clark, his son. Or with Martha, his wife. His family. But Jonathan made his choices. He set his own destiny in motion a long time ago.

Looking up at his son, he couldn't help but think back to the time that he made the best decision he'd ever made. Like any decision worth making, there had been pro's and con's at the time. But looking at him today, there was no 'con' that could hold a candle to what he was witnessing now.

_The blood rushed to his head and that caused Jonathan to wake slightly. His arms became loose and fell to the roof of his old truck, causing him to wake completely. He took in his surroundings, glancing to Martha and seeing she too was suspended in the air._

_'The truck must have flipped over,' he thought to himself._

_Looking out his driver-side window, he began to think maybe his brain had flipped in the process. He saw something that...well, he couldn't be seeing._

_A boy. A little boy. Naked. Walking towards the truck. In the middle of the ditch that the meteor had dug out. And He was...smiling. And didn't have a single scratch on him. Jonathan didn't know what to say or think, so he called out to his better half to do it for him, "Martha?"_

_She turned to see him too. And like Jonathan, she didn't know what to say. The boy simply kneeled down and smiled wider._

_The next thing Jonathan could remember was walking down the ditch, trying to find his way back up onto the road above. They had wrapped the boy in one of the blankets he kept under the seat of the truck, he could already tell that Martha was getting attached._

_'He was a cute kid', Jonathan thought._

_"Kids just don't wall out of the sky, Martha"_

Jonathan chuckled to himself at the memory. Oh boy, he had been so wrong. A few feet further down the ditch, they found his ship. Martha somehow talked him into keeping him and they had to ask Lionel Luthor of all people for the favor of fixing the adoption.

A woman's voice caught his attention. He looked over to see Lois. Beautiful Lois Lane. He was proud of his son there for sure. At the time of his death, he was certain that Clark was going to marry Lana Lang. Lana was a very nice girl, very pretty and very important to Clark. It was natural to think his son would have found a way to make things work, even with his secret hanging over him everyday and Lana's desperate attempts to learn it.

But Lois was different. She had always been different.

Something about her was strangely familiar to Jonathan. Something about her convinced him to let her stay at the Kent Farm all those years ago despite the fact he hardly knew her. Despite the fact that she was going to be so very close to the Kent Secret in a time when things were all strung about. And he choose to let her continue to stay there even when she broke all the rules with a smile on her face.

_Apparently, Martha had caught them in the shower together. Or at least in the bathroom together. Wet. Clark naked. Lois in just Clark's shirt._

_The young man still inside of Jonathan wanted to quip, 'He is a senior in high school. Like Jonathan Kent was never caught with a pretty lady.' But the father in Jonathan stood strong. He had to send a message that this kind of behavior was not to be accepted in his household._

_He gave his son a strong look, but of course, Lois Lane was not easily intimidated. _

_"I don't understand what the big deal is here, we just took a shower-"_

_"Showers! We took separate showers," exclaimed Clark._

_If Jonathan hadn't had years of practice at keeping a straight face since the day Clark Kent came into their lives, years of explaining why Clark had done the things he'd done and the crazy stories that came along with it, he might have laughed._

_"At noon?" Martha asked._

_Lois and Clark shared a look, and Jonathan knew this was going to bad._

_"We were just gunna-"_

_"We went to Chloe's safe house," Clark told them. Lois shot him another look. A look that Jonathan was very familiar with, a look he was used to being on the receiving end with the woman to his own side. "These guys showed up and chased us...into a field, there was all this dirt."_

_"Clark, that is a federal crime scene," Lois rolled her eyes at Jonathan, "And the last thing that we want, is for you kids to get involved with the FBI."_

_'For obvious reasons,' thought everyone but Lois._

_"Whoever it was, we don't need to worry because their chopper is face first in the middle of the field."_

And so began the history of Clark Kent doing things around Lois Lane that he didn't normally do. "_I had to save Lois,_" he had told Jonathan later on.

Jonathan wanted to laugh. He really ought to have known then. He really ought to have seen that all their bickering, all their tension was really just a precursor for all of this. He had become close to Lois during his campaign for senator. She was a very smart young woman, and everything he had seen since his death, showed she had more heart than she ever let on.

That's when he realized what was so familiar. She reminded him so much of Martha. Strong, compassionate, and exactly what Clark needed to become the man he wanted to be. Jonathan knew deep down that it was Lois that turned Clark into a beacon of hope for Metropolis.

_Jonathan stood amongst the rest of the crowd watching the fire, careful not to draw attention to himself._

_A...well, man...had shown up. Well, really, he kind of...flew up...to the building. He donned a blue suit with a red cap, Jonathan recognized the symbol on his chest. It was the crest for the House of El. _

_He had seen it a thousand times, what with his son belonging to that particular Kryptonian House._

_The mysterious hero had been helping the firefighters for the better part of the last fifteen minutes, helping them not only put out the fire but rescue some of the trapped people still inside as well. _

_After the chaos was taken care of, the hero flew down to the street to thank the firefighters for their help._

_"Thank you, Captain..." he looks down at his name tag, "...Mooney."_

_The Captain looked perplexed at the man wearing a cape. "Uh...th-th-thank you, uh, sir."_

_"No, sir. Don't thank me, Captain Mooney. We're all part of the same team, you're the real heroes here. Goodnight."_

_The Hero began to hover over the ground, getting ready to take off into the skies again. That's when a small boy ducked under the caution tape surrounding the scene and rushed over, "Who are you?"_

_Jonathan remembered it like it was yesterday. His son smiled and looked at the boy, __"I'm Superman."_

Jonathan was snapped out of his thoughts when the priest asked Clark if he took Lois to be his lawful wedded wife.

In that moment, he witnessed his son having another one of those '_things-he-would-never-do-without-Lois-Lane-there_' moments. He actually started to shift his jaw back and forth, almost as if he was _considering_ saying anything but 'I do'. Lois looked like she was going to kill him, but Jonathan knew by the smile playing across Clark's lips and the chuckles from the both the bridal party and the groomsmen that he was playing with her.

What happened next went very quickly. Clark said "I do," and Lois lit up. But a micro-second later it seemed, Lois was kissing him. There may have been a quick "Yeah, me too," in there somewhere. But if you had blinked, you probably would have missed it.

It was Jonathan's turn to light up. The crowd erupted and the Priest laughed to himself, "You may kiss the bride."

Before anyone could turn to see him, Jonathan turned to make his exit.

He wasn't supposed to be there. He couldn't let anyone see him, but before he was out of sight, he could feel his son's eyes on his back. He turned to look over his shoulder, catching Clark's eye in the process. Clark was smiling, he knew not to draw attention to Jonathan. Jonathan smiled warmly at his son before giving him a thumbs up, causing Clark's smile to break out into a full on grin. Before anyone could turn, Jonathan faded into the light.

'_That's my son. And I can't imagine ever being more proud to call myself Clark Kent's father, Superman or not._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that for a Jonathan Kent chapter? If there are any fans of the original Superman movie, you might have noticed the name of the Fire Captain is the same as the Officer (Mooney) that Superman handed the Thief over to. Also, his line is the same line he tells the Warden at the end of the movie. Thought I'd throw that in there for fun. The fire scene is the continuation of the scene we saw at the end of 'the Planet'.

I like to think that Clark toying with Lois during "I do" is what she was dragging him off for in my 'Martha' chapter, haha. And in true Lois and Clark fashion, I honestly don't know if she'd kill him for toying with her or jump his bones for having the nerve to do it. Haha. Hope you liked it!

**Next Up:** _Jo'an Lane Kent_.


	19. Jo'an

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Of course! I couldn't do Location Chapters without the Talon! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Awww, thank you so much! And yes, the Pilot and Homecoming are two of my favorite episodes too, but I think Crimson and Persuasion might be up at the top of my list too, haha. Gotta love a crazy(ier than usual) Lois. hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - You are far too nice, haha. I originally meant for him to walk out unnoticed, I like to think that Jonathan has been there for some of the big moments in Clark's life however it is that he does it. He was a little too timely at the end of 'Lazarus' for it to have been a coincidence, haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, BoJo? haha.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #19, Jo'an Lane Kent

**Author's Note: **This chapter was written by mygyps17, so make sure you do some thank you's in your reviews! I personally love it, and I think it's a perfect fit our little story here. Hopefully this is what you guys were looking for, it certainly was what I was looking for!

**

* * *

**"Mom's gonna kill 'em," Jo'an Lane Kent muttered to herself as she watched her very gonna-be-dead-soon daddy give mouth-to-mouth to the pretty lady who kept trying to get his attention down by the Crater Lake.

"No way, she'll probably end up kissing him. Just watch," Bart Allen replied confidently.

Jo'an scoffed and looked over at the man who's sort of her uncle. Sometimes, he just doesn't make very much sense. "Bobo, why would Mom kiss Daddy? He's kissing another lady. She's gonna kill him."

Bart rolled his eyes and looked over at the girl that's sort of his niece. "Jojo, you may have two x chromosomes, but you're just ten years old. You don't know anything about women yet," he said in a know-it-all tone that completely grated on her nerves.

She doesn't need to know about women. She knows her mother. Well. And her mom's gonna kill her daddy. That's common sense. She doesn't need any chromosomes to know that.

Jo'an sighed deeply before crossing her arms over her chest. He may be wrong, but he's giving her his full attention and she's always liked that.

"Explain," she said.

Bart arched an eyebrow as he takes in the little girl's defensive stance. He crossed his arms over his own chest and adopted the very same posture.

It's time for a Bojo Showdown.

"First, your daddy's not kissing the pretty, very pretty lady with the very soft"-

"Focus Bobo," Jo'an snapped her fingers in his face, making him come out of his slight trance.

"Right, your daddy's not kissing the lady, he's helping her breathe."

"Why?" Jo'an asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Because she can't breathe," Bart says with furrowed brows. His niece is brighter than that.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why can't she breathe Bobo?" Jo'an asked in a highly patronizing tone that Bart caught onto immediately.

"Uh, because she nearly drowned," he answers; but his voice sounds more like he's asking.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why'd she nearly drown Bobo?"

"Because she-wait a minute. I see where this is going," Bart said.

"No, keep going Bobo. You know so much more than me."

"Alright," Bart admitted a little with a lift of his chin and a slight shoulder roll.

Jo'an straightened up a little more too.

He has a comeback. One that he thinks is legit. So, unconsciously she prepared herself for it in a physical way. Of course it's not going to help their argument in the least; it's just what they do.

"So...maybe the lady nearly drowned because she couldn't keep her bright, beautifully lit, perfectly sculpted"-

"Focus Bobo."

"Eyes off of your daddy. And maybe your mother noticed."

Jo'an impatiently blew a puff of air through pursed lips. He can't be serious.

"Okay, so your mother definitely noticed," Bart corrected himself before continuing with, "but I still think she might kiss him afterward."

Jo'an's eyes bug out and her mouth falls open. She's in total shock, and she's feeling sad too.

Her Bobo has obviously and finally cracked; and she knows exactly where cracked people go. She's going to miss him so much.

"Now Jojo, just hear me out," Bart says as soon as she starts looking at him as if she'll be visiting him at Belle Reeve from this very second until forever. "I wouldn't put it past your mother to give your daddy a huge smoocharoo after he saves the lady; but not because she's proud of him or anything. I mean, it'll look like she's glad he saved the lady with the very nice"-

"Focus Bobo."

"Right; but really, your mom will be marking her territory. She'll be letting all of these other beautifully sculpted, bikini wearing"-

"Focus Bobo."

"Ladies know that your daddy belongs to her and only her,'" Bart concluded.

Jo'an takes a second to think that over. She doesn't believe it; but she can understand where Bobo was going with that and she's relieved. It is plausible that her mother would kiss her father to mark her territory.

"See, I knew you'd come around," Bart says smugly before relaxing his defensive stance. He'd just won his first BoJo showdown. It feels good. Really good. So good that he feels the need to gloat just a little. "It's okay Jojo. When you get older, you'll understand the way women think much better. You're just a little girl right now, but you won't be forever."

Jo'an just shakes her head a little and rolls her eyes at her uncle. She doesn't need to know how women think. She just needs to know how her mother thinks. And she knows her mom pretty well. "Bobo look," Jo'an says simply before pointing at her mother.

Bart looks in the direction that the young girl is pointing and gasps.

Lois Lane is making her way toward Clark Kent, and the look on her face...he knew that look.

"She's gonna kill 'em," Bart muttered to himself.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I thought that was great. Have to love a BoJo showdown! This chapter was written entirely by mygyps17 and I made just a few minor adjustments, just to make it past-tense to match the usual flow of the other chapters. If you haven't checked out 'You Make Daddy Sick', you need to get on it, Jo'an is entirely mygyps17's character and what a character she is! Just as much trouble as I'd expect a Lane-Kent child to be!

We will probably see her again, but I'm not sure when that will be. In addition to the Character-centric and Location-centric chapters, I'm expecting to do some Major Holiday-centric chapters as well. We could see Jo'an return in Mother's Day and Father's Day chapters. I hate to steal Jo'an away from mygyps17 but she's just so awesome! haha. We'll see what happens down the road. I hope everyone enjoyed it!

**Next Up:** _Valentine's Day._


	20. Valentine's Day

**Review Comments:**

_**Meg**_ - (_from mygyps17_) - Lol thanks! I figured a Belle Reeve reference would be entertaining. That was one of my favorite parts to.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - (_from mygyps17_) - Of course Jo'an was right! She's just like Lois; and what do you think she would do if she saw Bobo giving mouth to mouth to a very, very pretty lady with the very soft- Lol. That coould be a story in itself; Bobo getting a girlfriend. I don't think Jo'an would like that very much;)

_**Gladius Grim**_ - (_from mygyps17_) - Thank you! BoJo is always pretty easy for me to write. I have no idea why. But I am glad that you like it; and that it flowed right;)

_**kcain84**_ - (_from mygyps17_) - hmm, that could be fun.

_**A,sky**_ - (_from mygyps17_) - Thank you. I think the constant focus Bobo was my favorite part. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

_**sunset**_ - Aww, I'm glad the music worked for you! haha. I too absolutely loved the Lois Lane introduction, even though I thought it would feel wrong since traditionally speaking he doesn't meet her til he is Superman, Erica Durance completely blew me away. Her Lois Lane is what really turned me into a big time Smallville fan. Love that character. Haha, you have no idea how often I write a chapter, and then realize there was no kill me or kiss me moment, haha. I'll admit, I had to go back and add that, and it was probably out of character, but I thought it was far too fitting for what Jonathan was thinking, haha.

I think I will use the wedding as another opportunity to write some other chapters, I already have one idea that will show Lois pre-ceremony that should fit well with the theme, so keep on the look-out for that. It'll probably be a Wonder Woman chapter, haha, tease tease. I too thought it was insane that they let Lois live there, but like he figures in the chapter, maybe she reminded him of Martha? haha, I'm happy you liked the chapter! Onto Valentines Day! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #20, Valentine's Day

**Author's Note:** So we'll have a scene from Persuasion at the beginning here, but the rest should be nice new stuff.

**

* * *

**_"I'm never going to buy chocolate from a fairy again. I promise you, I was not myself. I don't know what she put in that stuff," she told him._

_Clark was a little disappointed for a moment. She had opened up to him, now we were back to square one. But then he thought, 'Maybe I can turn the tide here, even if it's just a little bit.'_

_"That's too bad. I kind of liked your outfit," he told her._

_She had to admit, she didn't see that one coming._

_"You really are an old fashioned romantic, aren't you?"_

_He just flashed the Kent smile in return._

_"I guess it's easier to complain about Valentine's Day than it is to give it a shot," she said. __"So, in the face of the candy-coated emotional manipulation of V-Day...maybe I just...need to trust that what we have is something more."_

After that...experience, Clark had decided that he was going to get at least one Valentine's Day right before he died. Because well, he always had a good chance of dying on V-Day, it was the day that he screwed up on the most. Lois Lane was a handful all on her own. Add in all the expectations and romantic implications that came with the holiday, well, it was a recipe for a disaster that left even Superman grasping for straws.

But not this year.

No, sir. He was going to get it right this year, whether Lois Lane liked it or not.

He was rushing around the house, trying to clean up. He knew that Lois was going to be home soon, Perry had sent her out on assignment so that Clark had time to set everything up. He needed to thank that man, he'd be saving his butt from Lois for a while now.

Clark intended on a romantic dinner, rose petals thrown around the house, just something simple.

He could do simple, right?

As he walked into the living room, straightening the pillows on the new couch, he found himself remembering a Valentine's Day past. A Valentine's Day that led to him purchasing this new couch. Oh boy, he couldn't let that happen again...

_Clark waited down stairs, Lois had blindfolded him and told him to wait for his Valentine's Day surprise._

_He wanted to use his super-hearing and x-ray vision to see what she had in store for him, he knew that she had something special up her sleeve. She was gloating the whole way home from the restaurant about how she was going to 'win' their Valentine's Day. But he had to contain himself, it wasn't fair to use his powers to spoil her surprise, no matter how much he might want to. The thought produced an involuntary sigh._

_Just then, he heard one of the stairs creak._

_"Lois?"_

_"Stay where you are, Smallville. I have to get into position here," she snapped._

_Clark frowned beneath the blindfold, 'what exactly was she planning?'_

_After a few moments, she called out to him to turn around and take off the blindfold. Doing as he was told, he pulled off the blindfold excitedly and turned around, only to stop in his tracks and let his jaw drop in surprise. 'Hubba Hubba,' he thought to himself._

_Lois was sitting on top of the kitchen table, wearing the sexiest piece of fabric he had ever seen. He had to call it a piece of fabric, because he wasn't quite sure there was enough of it to be classified as clothing. He was absolutely speechless, and Lois knew she had 'won'._

_"Well, Smallville? what do you think?" she asked with a sultry voice._

_Before he could reply, he felt a feeling he hadn't __felt in many years. He eyes steamed up and fire shot out of them, lighting the couch on fire and burning the vast majority of the living room wallpaper near the door. Quickly he rushed over and put out the fire with his super-breath._

_He could hear Lois laughing in the background._

_"Geeze Clark, talk about adding some spark to the relationship," she quipped._

_Clark turned around and smiled sheepishly at her, "Whoops?"_

The memory reminded him he needed to put the food in oven.

That year, they nearly had a perfect Valentine's Day. Of course, they've had a lot of near-perfect Valentine's Days. Those were the ones that were the worst though, like losing a no-hitter in the ninth inning. Ones like the 'Cupid Fiasco, starring Oliver Queen'

_Oliver was standing on top of a very tall box, 'Seriously, we couldn't have thought this out better? A box, Clark?'_

_He was not-so-silently cursing himself for agreeing to be part of this. Clark had come up with some crazy production for Valentine's Day, he was going to give Lois some speech about being hit by Cupid's Arrow, and Oliver was supposed to hit him with an arrow on cue._

_It wasn't a real arrow, not that Clark was going to be hurt by one of Ollie's arrows anyway. It was just supposed to stick to the front of his jacket like he had taken an arrow to the heart. 'For a Farmboy, he is the most sappy guy I have ever met,' Oliver thought to himself._

_From the looks of it, Clark was already well into his speech and Lois looked all kinds of mesmerized._

_Chloe was there to 'spot' him on top of the very tall box and keep him company. He couldn't believe that she had agreed to this when they could have been off on their own romantic Valentine's Day production. And just as he thought that, he felt a hand on his calf. Looking down, he saw that Chloe had finished that bottle of wine he brought for their 'picnic-on-a-rooftop'. By herself._

_"Oh Ollie...," she called._

_Her hand began to drift higher to his knee, and Oliver felt himself shake on top of the very tall box._

_"Chlo...stop...I'm gunna fall," he told told her in between shakes and laughs._

_She stopped for a moment, but then he heard something dragging across the rooftop. He looked down to see that she was dragging the stool he had used to get on the very tall box over towards them. He gulped, 'This was not going to end well.'_

_He looked over to see that Clark was nearing the end of his speech, so he drew his arrow and began to aim. Just then, Chloe's hands found his butt._

_"Chlo, stop! I have a target to hit here!"_

_"Shhhhhh, I'm gunna hit your target, Mr. Queen," she murmured against his back. _

_She was now standing on the box with him. The very tall, very shakey, very unfocused box. Oliver knew that Clark was going to give him the signal any second now, but now Chloe was tickling him under his ear. "Chlo, I have to focus, just give me one second," he told her._

_"I can't wait any longer, I've been all alone down there for so long!"_

_Oliver tried to keep his ear against his shoulder, but then she found the other one. And he had to you know, aim. Just then Clark gave him the signal, leading to Oliver pulling back his arrow to fire. But while he accounted for wind and distance and a plethora of other variables, he found one thing he didn't account for: Chloe Sullivan's hands on his...his...where they aren't supposed to be mid-shot!_

_Oliver gulped as he let the arrow fly. 'This was not going to be good.'_

_He saw the arrow hit Clark...just not where he was intending. No, the arrow was firmly stuck to his forehead._

_"IT WASN'T ME! IT WAS CHLOE!" he shouted before booking it off the rooftop, leaving Chloe to stand there disappointed. 'What? Clark Kent is FAST.'_

_Chloe looked at her boyfriend jumping off the roof, then looked back to Lois and Clark. Clark had his hands on his hips, looking down and shaking his head with what appeared to be a smile. Lois was on the ground holding her sides in laughter, chanting that she couldn't breathe._

Clark groaned at the mere memory of it.

It was all good though, he had found Oliver eventually. Needless to say, Clark may have also put an arrow where Oliver might not have intended it. That Valentine's Day didn't end horribly, Lois at least didn't try to kill him, unlike after...the Cupcake.

_Lois waited patiently at the table for Clark to return with her 'special gift'. And of course by patient, that meant she had her arms crossed and tapped her foot at a speed even Bart Allen would be envious of. And then there were the sighs and the arched eyebrows._

_"Ok Lois, are you ready for your special gift?" Clark called as he re-entered the dining room._

_She started to roll her eyes until she saw what he had in his hand. It was a...cupcake. A...chocolate cupcake. A...chocolate cupcake that looked a lot like the kind that Mrs. Kent used to make her. "Ooooooooh, you are so getting lucky tonight," she told him, grabbing it from him._

_Clark smiled, until Lois took a large bite out of the cupcake, chewed quickly, and swallowed._

_"Uh..."_

_He looked in her hand, there wasn't nearly enough left to..._

_"Did you..."_

_Lois looked at him quizzically._

_"You didn't..."_

_"What Smallville?"_

_Clark opened his mouth, but no words came out. His mouth kept moving, but no sounds came out._

_"Speak. Use your big boy words."_

_"Did you just...swallow...umm...that?"_

_Lois looked at him like he was crazy. "Umm, yeah? That's what you do with food, Smallville?"_

_"But..."_

_"Geeze, Clark, you put food in your mouth, chew it up, and swallow it down. I know you went to Cornfield High, but even you should know this, you are a farmer after all. You know, when you're not in your tights...hey, you think you might wear those tonight?" she asked with a wagging eyebrows._

_Clark couldn't speak. This wasn't happening._

_"But Lois, I put...I know it's silly...but your show...you said it was sweet.."_

_Lois shook her head at his husband, "What are you talking about?"_

_"I baked...a ring...into the cupcake."_

_Lois shook her head some more, but then realized what he was talking about._

_"In the...?"_

_"Yeah..."_

_Watching her walk out of the doctor's office, contents of her stomach missing, he had to chuckle. She looked pale and exhausted, but he knew the moans and groans were for dramatic effect. He chuckled, until he saw the look on her face. Until he heard the growl in her voice._

_"Clark."_

_His jaw dropped open as he paced backwards from her, "You're the one-"_

_"You don't hand a girl a Martha Kent Cupcake and not tell her there is a large hunk of metal inside!"_

All the memories made Clark chuckle as he tossed rose petals across the entry way floor. Knowing their luck, Lois would end up slipping on a rose petal and break her leg. He almost stopped at the thought, but then he figured '_Nah, Lois is more graceful than that_'.

As he climbed the stairs he found himself letting out a small laugh. She would be more likely to fall _up_ the stairs on her way to the bedroom. She's managed to get that move down pat, especially when she decides to carry up a midnight snack, laundry, some papers from work, her computer, _and_ those ratty pair of bunny slippers she washes constantly to try and make them smell_ less _bad.

'_Does she always have to be so stubborn? Would it kill her to make two trips?_' he thought as he made his way towards their bedroom.

Their plans were usually a disaster. Didn't matter if it was a holiday, a date, or even just a quiet family dinner.

Either something comes up, or something goes wrong, or something happens that would have Lois wanting to kill him, but the great thing about _their_ disasters, was she always seems to end up kissing him instead because well, she "kinda, maybe, sorta loves him" as she explained once.

But before he could enjoy any of those kissing memories, he heard a loud _**BANG!**_ downstairs.

"DAMN IT, SMALLVILLE! DID YOU MAKE THE IMPROMPTU SLIP-AND-SLIDE IN THE ENTRY WAY?"

With a gulp, Clark thought, "Let's just hope the kissing lasts longer than the killing."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? haha. I thought that was a lot of fun, I love writing Clark's failures and Lois' reactions to them, haha. At the end there we reference a 'quiet family dinner' and I think that probably means they have Jo'an in the 'present', originally there was a line about someone watching 'the kid', but I thought maybe everyone was ready for a just Lois and Clark chapter (despite the impromptu Chollie stuff, I needed him be distracted enough to miss the target, hahaha). Hope everyone liked it!

**Next Up:** _the Kitchen_.


	21. The Kitchen

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Haha, I felt the same way, I watched like four episodes from Season 1 afterwards. (I'll let mygyps17 reply to your Chapter 19 review). I liked that whole Ollie/Chloe thing too, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! At first, I was going to delete one of the three since it ran a little longer than usual, but I couldn't pick one I liked the least! haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Haha, I kept picturing Tom Welling's face with an arrow on his head, I thought you guys would like it, haha.

_**Ina100years**_ - Thank you! It's one of my favorites too, I love writing the funny stuff.

_**cathy03**_ - Rawr, haha, I guess I can see how one might feel that way, haha.

_**wicked**_ - I can't imagine Clois ever getting boring, haha, they're like the gift that keeps on giving!

_**Meg**_ - Hahaha, that was actually something I considered, but I went for the less-racy forehead shot, haha. And yes, the idea did kind of start with Crimson a little bit, they always seem to find themselves in trouble one way or another, haha. As for Jo'an, I think you'll like this next one then!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, it's always been a fear of mine that if you bake something into a cupcake or something, there is that risk! haha, this seemed like the perfect chance to use that fear in a positive way, haha. Hope you enjoy the next one!

_**sunset**_ - I will pass along your review to mygyps17, and hopefully have it up by the next chapter. I too am happy that I got to add Jo'an to the story, she is such a great character. I only saw the first season of Lois & Clark, but I bet that would have made a great story! haha. And I don't think you'll have to wait until Mother's Day or Father's Day to hear about Jo'an again, haha, just read below!

Lois is the master of going from wanting to kill Clark to wanting to kiss him, haha. We might see his speech in the future, haha. I love being able to insert a chapter within another chapter, like Shelby instead the Kents chapter or the recurring Wedding Chapter. I hope you like my approach in this next chapter to the title, I liked the way it sounded so I went with it, haha. I see Diana very similarly, I think she can have her moments to be funny, but it'll be very similar to Bruce in the sense that it won't be "silly funny" but probably more "deadpan funny", haha.

I won't lie, the original chapter might have peaked those thoughts, but this one is pretty tame, haha. Maybe next time? haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Kara/Bart? haha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #21, the Kitchen

**Author's Note: **This one kind of came out of no where, nothing close to what I originally intended. You can read more about that below. Enjoy!

* * *

"Where the hell is it?"

Clark looked up from the paper at Lois, eyebrows arched and a small smile playing on his face.

"Smallville! Have you seen it?"

Letting out a sigh, "No, I haven't seen it."

Lois bit her lip and tried to tell if he was lying. Concluding that he wasn't, she started to rip open some more cabinets with more intensity than any adult should over something so trivial. But it was hers dammit, Smallville bought it for her and it was important to her.

"Did you look in the fridge?" he offered.

She glared at him, almost as if she was upset with him for trying to help, but marched over to the fridge all the same. He had to stifle a chuckle, if only he had known that such a little gift would mean so much to her. It made him think back to the day he bought it.

_He had gone to the local thrift store with Kara to donate some of his old clothes, apparently Lois thought they needed his old farmboy clothes more than he did despite the fact that he saw more than a couple plaid shirts stuffed in one of "her" drawers. And when he saw it, he knew that he had to buy it._

_"I don't get it," Kara told him._

_"It's a call-back."_

_"What's a call-back?"_

_"Like, it reminds you of a memory. Of something special to you."_

_Kara looked at him like he was crazy. "That sounds stupid."_

_"Why is it stupid?"_

_"Why can't she just remember the memory when she looks at you?"_

_"Because this is a special memory, you wouldn't think about it when you just look at me."_

_Kara rolled her eyes and walked into the house. Lois was at the counter doing some research for her latest story. "'bout time you two, I was fixing on sending out a search party. Speaking of which, Kara, did you know Bart was in town?" Lois wagged her eyes at her kinda-sorta-sister-in-law._

_This caused the female kryptonian to blush, "Thats...thats nice."_

_"Yeah, I uh, I invited him to come to Game Night tonight with Ollie and Dinah," she told Kara._

_Kara's head shot up, "I need to go change."_

_Clark's eyebrows shot up while Lois looked victorious._

_"Because...I did chores earlier. Not because...other...people, things."_

_With red cheeks, Kara jetted up the stairs, leaving a laughing Lois and a chuckling Clark in the kitchen. Lois turned her attention back to Clark, and noticed that he was fiddling with something behind his back and looking far more nervous that usual._

_"Hey there, Smallville..." she started._

_Deer in the headlights._

_"...whatcha got behind your back there?"_

_Clark shuffles kind of nervously, 'Maybe Kara was right, maybe it was stupid.'_

_"Well, I uh, we uh, were at the store, you know..."_

_Lois begins to smirk, "Where I sent you..."_

_"Yeah, and uh, well, I saw something, and it uh, well, it made me think about you. It's probably silly but uh..."_

_Lois grinned and held out her hands, "gimme, gimme."_

_He couldn't help but smile at her childish plea, he handed her the present._

_At first, she didn't get it. What was the importance of a little plastic kid's cup? But as she turned it, she saw it._

_Elmer Fudd._

_The same cartoon hunter that Clark had a night-light of in his bedroom. One that disappeared when Lois moved out and then magically reappeared when she moved back in. This was also the case with some of his favorite plaid shirts, but that was not the important thing. For now._

_"I don't know, it's probably silly...I just thought you might like it..." he tailed off._

_Lois looked up at him. Her Smallville knew how to surprise her sometimes._

_"It's...it's..." she started. Unable to find the word, she decided just to throw herself at him. _

_After a while, Kara reappeared and started to ask Lois' advice about her top, but saw her cousin and his wife on the kitchen floor. Her cousin was of course red-faced in embarrassment and Lois was of course red-faced in anger for being interrupted, "I'm just going to...leave."_

_Lois turned back to Clark and gave him a long look. "It's perfect."_

A particularly loud cabinet slam brought him back to reality, and he noticed that she still hadn't found the cup. He wasn't lying earlier, he hadn't seen it. But if it wasn't in it's usual spot, and it wasn't in the fridge, and it wasn't in the sink, there was only one place it could be because only one person who would dare touch her favorite cup. Watching his wife rummage through every cabinet in the kitchen, he had to smile.

_'These two are going to kill each other,' _he thought_. 'Or they're going to kill me...I haven't decided.'_

Lois slammed the final cabinet door shut and looked at her husband with a fierce glare. "Don't even start your stupid 'kill me or kiss me' crap, it's all that damn kissing that got me into this mess in the first place," she told him, stomping towards the stairs. "JUNIOR! DO YOU HAVE MY CUP AGAIN!"

Clark smiled to himself. '_I'm definitely in the clear. Lois and Jo'an were definitely going to kill each other.'_

_

* * *

_**Author's Note:** Originally, there was going to be a series of scenes from the show. Probably ones from Rabid, Hostage, ending with Abandoned and the 'Clark, its starting' line that I'm so fond of. But then for some reason, I came up with this idea on a whim. I hope everyone liked it, I figured there are plenty of chances to use those scenes, and a lot of the Location chapters will be 'flashbacks' of sorts like 'the Loft' was, so why not mix it up?

The great thing about this chapter, is that it is now a tie in for my "Clark's Bedroom" chapter. You'll see why later! haha.

**Next Up:** _Diana Prince_.


	22. Diana

**Review Comments:**

_**Meg**_ - Very much Lois-Logic, haha. I'm not a big Wonder Woman fan either, I'm actually pretty unfamiliar with the character, but she is part of the League so she needs to show up at some point or another, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Yeah, I'm gunna adress that down below, I kind of spaced out on that one, haha. Thanks, I'm trying to blend in some new stuff with some old stuff to give it that, i don't know, authentic feel. There very well may be some insights on how she "got into that mess", haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Of course Jo'an is going to have the cup! haha. 'Clark's Room' is next, I think you'll like it! haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - That was the original plan, but I went for something a little more heartfelt with some of the chapters ahead intended to be more of the comedic variety. I'll make sure to make up for it later though! haha. The Kara/Bart pairing is a little bit odd to me as well, originally, I was going to have Chloe end up with Bart before my inner-Chlollie fan kicked in after watching some of the re-runs. Kara is a tough one because her most prolific relationship in the comics is with Brainiac 5, but that didn't seem to mesh well with our Smallville version of Brainiac 5, hahaha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Haha, I was trying to hide my hand for as long as I could! haha.

_**sunset**_ - Well, the flash back itself was pre-Jo'an for sure. I'm going to address the time-line issue down below as to not clog up this top section, so make sure to check that out for any answers. As for the title line, Clark did use it during the very first chapter, and he _may _have said it before as well. Someone will, well, actually two people will say the line in this chapter, so we'll have to see what I come up with. Haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents, the Lanes

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Diana Prince

**Author's Note: **Alrighty, I don't know why, but I feel like this one is a different...tone? I dunno, haha, I hope everyone likes it!

* * *

"How do you think Smallville is doing?"

Diana's head shot up. '_Oh no._'

Lois was standing in the mirror, but she wasn't checking to see how she looked. No, she had taken the time to shake every wedding gift to see if she could tell what was inside. And inside of J'onn J'onzz gift, she apparently knew there were Chocos by the sound alone. Somehow, Diana was left to look after the Chocos chomping Lois Lane. Chloe went to get Clark from the loft, Kara was dictating the seating chart, and Dinah was helping Mrs. Kent with the flowers.

That left Diana with Lois. Where girl talk could happen. In frilly dresses. Diana had never been more terrified.

"Uh, well...I'm sure he's fine, Lois. I'm sure he is very excited to marry you."

Lois considered it. "I'd like to think he's at least a little scared."

Diana frowned. "Why would you want him to be scared?"

"It's our thing. He calls it my 'kill him or kiss him' charm. Well, maybe he didn't use the word 'charm' exactly, but it's what he meant."

Nodding, Diana couldn't help but smile a little bit. Lois and Clark seemed to have it all figured out. Well, at least the 'happy' part. They bantered and bickered more than any couple she knew, but for whatever reason, it only seemed to make them that much stronger.

_It was one of her first days at Watchtower, and Diana was frozen. All she did was ask how they met, and it had spiraled into...this. She wasn't sure what she should do. She wanted to leave, but she didn't want to be hit in the crossfire, so she just watched them volley back and forth._

_"Lois, I saved you first."_

_She looked absolutely enraged at the prospect of him claiming HER save. "You would have been dead meat if I hadn't kicked her ass."_

_"I stopped the machine. You would have been dead meat first."_

_"I would have gotten out of it, Clarkie."_

_Clark rolled his eyes. "Well, that's really neither here nor there, I saved you that day in the fields."_

_"Wha..." Lois looks completely flabbergasted, "...what day in the fields?"_

_"The day we went to Chloe's safe house? There was a helicopter? You scared the crap out of my parents by showing up when I was in the shower? That was the first time I saved you, so really, I saved you first."_

_Diana wasn't even sure that they knew she was still standing there. They each had that fire-in-the-eyes look. Their eyes said they were going to fight to the death, but the smiles on their faces said otherwise. If she didn't know any better, this was their foreplay._

_"It was my father, Smallville. What were you saving me from? Being grounded? Give me a break! I definitely saved you first."_

_"Even if I wanted to call the Dr. Fine Incident a tie, which I don't, I did save you from the 'devoted football' players when Chloe got dosed."_

_Lois put her hand on her hip and glared at Clark. "I was in control of the situation, Clark Kent, I didn't need your help."_

_Oliver Queen walked into the room and saw the couple pitted against each other in their duel of words. He saw Diana frozen in place, seemingly unsure of what she should do. Ollie knew better, walking around the couple without them even noticing, he stood next to Diana._

_"Not sure what to do, Princess?"_

_Diana looked up. "I don't know if they're going to kill each other-_

_"Or jump each other's bones?" Diana nodded. "Yeah, that's how it always is. It's kind of...disturbing."_

_"Why-"_

_"Do they do it?" Diana nodded, this all seemed so strange. "It's their thing. It's what makes them tick, I guess. I'll tell you, one fight with Lois? Clark can go without the sun for a week. Their...whatever is what powers him. They go at it like, five times a day. I don't see why they don't just have sex."_

_That made them stop and look at Oliver. "What the hell are you talking about?" demanded Lois._

"Well?"

Diana didn't even realize she was being talked to. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Are you bringing anybody to this shindig?"

"Oh, uh, no. I'm one of the single ladies," she told Lois with a smile.

Truth be told, being Wonder Woman didn't leave much time for a love life. She didn't know how Clark or Oliver did it, I guess their partners were so close to what they were doing that it worked. She had to admit, she thought Bruce Wayne could fill out a suit like no other, but he was with Chloe.

"Well, I'll tell you something Kara told me once: 'It's easy for people to just see the powers and not the person behind them, even heroes need someone to come home to.' You're a bang-up gal, Diana, you've listened to me rant when I know you don't do all this girly stuff-"

"Oh, no, it's fine Lois."

Lois smiled softly at her. "No, no, I know I'm a handful. Clark tells me all the time. But don't worry, I think your Mr. Right is closer than you think."

She smiled back at her. Lois knew that Diana had a crush on Bruce and even though she didn't want to see her cousin get hurt, she thought that Chloe was more of a bow and arrow kind of girl, not so much bats and shadows. She just felt bad for Dinah getting left out though, '_maybe I can hook her up with Hal..._'

While Lois was caught up in her match-making, Diana thought about their conversation. Since Bruce Wayne showed up at her doorstep in Washington, she had been trying to be part of this group of heroes. But thinking about everything that she's seen from Lois and Clark, she realized that heroes weren't just people in costumes. Sometimes it's the people who they go home to that give them the strength to be Superheroes.

Lois was a hero in her own way. She was definitely Clark's hero.

"Uh guys," called a voice. The brunettes turned to look at Chloe Sullivan standing in the doorway. "I couldn't get Clark's cufflinks to work properly, so he wants Lois to help him really quick." Before the two could protest, they saw two suited arms wrap around the doorway.

Lois sighed dramatically and walked to the door. "Smallville, how many times do I have to tell you? You just have to make sure this part sticks up straight, and then it slides right in." None of them heard Clark gulp. "Okay? Geeze Smallville, what would you do without me?" None of them saw Clark smile.

Diana smiled as she noticed that as usual, Lois's eyes said she was going to kill him. But the sultry tone in her voice? It promised quite the Honeymoon.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Originally, this was going to be more of a Diana observing Lois and wondering if she would ever be like Lois and if her and Bruce would ever be like Lois and Clark but then I realized that it was more or less stated that Bruce and Chloe were still together in 'Little Jimmy' and that has a couple "husband" lines. I will find a way to incorporate that storyline into another chapter, but I hope you liked this one!

I think that Lois would want her cousin and Oliver to be together, she was far too excited about it during 'Escape', haha. The "Hal" reference is a nod to Green Lantern, Hal Jordan. I've never been a big Green Lantern fan, but I should put forth more effort to include him in the story. He is an original member of the Justice League. I hope everyone noticed Lois' cufflink line from 'Bride' and the reference to his struggles with his cufflinks from 'the Loft'.

My "Wonder Woman Introduction" story has always been that Bruce was part of the team first, and he was sent to recruit her for the team. I wrote a short-story a long time ago about the Trinity (Supes, Bats, and Wonder Woman) and Bruce went to meet Diana about joining and that's how they kind of started their romance, so it's my unofficially backstory for how she became part of the team. I'll probably have a chapter where we see how each of Bruce and Diana join the team, it's just about finding a way to make that fit within the theme.

And now for the time-line thing.

The thing with Jo'an, is that I'm not sure the events of 'You Make Daddy Sick' actually occurred in my "universe". As for the cup, that was a my bad moment, I totally forgot that she had it already when Jo'an showed up. The way I see it, things can't have gone the way they went in 'You Make Daddy Sick' because Lana _doesn't _make Daddy sick in the future because she's been cured of the kryptonite as evidenced in the first chapter, long before Jo'an. I think if anything, Jo'an is just my own personal ideal mini-Lois and Clark, so she's turned out to be the kid, haha. I thought about going back and changing "wife" to "Lois" in the flashback or something, but she wouldn't have kissed him at that point in time, nor would she have stolen his nightlight when she moved out yet. We're just going to have to accept that little error, sorry guys, that one was my bad.

Anyways, shoot me a review and tell me what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Clark's Room_.


	23. Clark's Room

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! I was trying to throw in some extra Kara stuff, I keep seeming to leave her out and she's one of my favorite characters, haha, it has been killing me that she hasn't had a bigger role! I have been SO bad to Tess Mercer too, I can't believe 22 chapters and no mentions (i think), i'm such a bad fan sometimes, haha. Nothing wrong with not being a fan of Chloe and Bruce, I'm trying to spread around the pairings a bit, haha. Personally, I'm probably a fan of Chloe and Oliver and a fan of Bruce and Diana the most (next to Clois of course).

_**sunset**_ - I think we will see the original origin of the title in the next chapter, haha, and maybe Lois and Clark discussing it for the first time in the chapter after that, so hang in there for me! I like to think that with Lois knowing Clark's secret, she is very proud of all the times that she has saved him, haha, which has been quite a few times. I think it'd be natural for those kind of debates, haha.

Diana thought and she shared the title with Oliver at another point, so I think the whole gang is onto the couple, haha. And I do think that Lois is Clark's hero in a lot of way. Originally, I didn't like Superman very much. But I found that characters like Lois, the Kents, Jimmy Olson, and of course the people of Metropolis are what make Clark do what he does. They make him Superman. So in a lot of ways, just as he inspires the world, the world inspires him.

I appreciate that view of it. That's kind of what I originally intended, kind of like how their might be ten different comics that are all current day comics, but are about the same character, have many different things in common, they just might not be exactly the same? If that makes sense? I do believe you are right about the timeline in mygyps17's story, it was right about the time in Requiem. Hope you enjoy 'Clark's Room'!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Clark's Room

**Author's Note: **Take another risk and offer a song recommendation? 'Crack the Shutters' by Snow Patrol. I was listening to it to get into the right headspace for some of the scenes in this one. Also, I like to think that this was the night after 'Ambushed' from Season 10, but I suppose it doesn't have to be, but it does have to be at least after that point in time, you will see why preeeeeeety quickly, haha. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

The sunlight shined softly in Clark's bedroom, warming the two bodies not often found in this bed. Not together anyways.

Clark stirred first. Of course. Daylight would never be enough to wake Lois Lane. He blinked a few times, trying to shake the sleep from his head. He looked down to see Lois using his chest as a pillow, the very image of it brought a smile to his face. He whispered to her, trying to wake her.

"Shut your face, Smallville. Sleep," she muttered against his chest.

Clark's Room wasn't sure to make of what it had just witnessed. They had spent the night, well, they hadn't spent it fighting. And yet, she already seemed keen on killing him if he disrupted her sleep anymore than he already has. It didn't know how to describe them.

There had been a lot of conflicting moments like that in this room.

_"I'm going to kill that plaid wearing, Lana loving, stupid, stupid Farmboy!" she fumed._

_Lois burst through the bedroom door soaking wet. "I'll show him. Pick me up and spray me with water, him and his stupid dog. 'Help me give him a bath' he says, ha! More like 'let me get you soaking wet and feel you up', stupid, stupid Farmboy."_

_"You aren't talking about me, are you?"_

_She turned to see the Farmboy in question standing in the doorway, toweling off his wet hair._

_"Yeah, I'm talking about you," she said, walking over to poke him in the chest. "Where do you get off pulling that crap?"_

_Clark smirked at her, she was kind of cute when she was all wet, wait what?_

_"You did put dog shampoo in my hair, Lois."_

_"You said my hair was like the mutt's hair," she retorted._

_"You both have sandy blonde hair, Lois."_

_Lois glared at him. 'Stupid farmboy and his stupid answers.'_

_Her thoughts were cut off by him pulling his t-shirt over his head. "What the hell do you think you are doing, Smallville?"_

_Clark shot her a funny look._

_"Umm, I'm getting some dry clothes."_

_"In here?"_

_"It's my room."_

_Her eyes shot up into her bangs. 'Oh yeah, I must have been distracted by all that chest. I mean...who am I kidding, it's because of all the chest.'_

_Apparently, Clark had noticed that Lois was struggling to respond._

_"Checking me out, Lois? Oh how the mighty have fallen" That smirk belonged to her. It did not at all make him look handsome. _

_'__Yeah right, Lane,' a voice told her._

_At first, she froze, but then regained her composure. "Oh, you know, Smallville..."_

_She walked up to him, getting very close and causing him to get very nervous. Sh leaned down a little, but he was too focused on her face to notice why. She got very close to his face, he could literally feel her breath against his lips. "...we both know that..."_

_She started to walk away, swinging her hips with each step. "...you wish!"_

_Lois promptly turned and threw his wet t-shirt at his face. The water flew about, the shirt itself hit him just right to wrap around his head._

_By the time he pulled the shirt off, she was gone. Five seconds ago, he was pretty sure he wanted to kiss her. Now? Now, He was going to kill her._

_"You are so dead, Lane," he muttered under his breath._

Clark started to rise from bed, but Lois moved her head from his chest and laid across him with her mid-section on his chest. Clark started to laugh, even though he could easily pick her up, she was trying to use her body to hold him in place. It was adorably childish.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

Lois reached her arm back to cover his mouth with her hand. "More sleep. Shut face."

Clark gave in and laid his head back against the pillow. He could think of worse things than sleeping in with Lois Lane. On top of him. Topless.

_"I just have to pack up what's left of my stuff!" she hollered down stairs, entering Clark's bedroom._

_She could faintly hear Clark say something about the number of bags he already had to take out to the car. She stepped over the pile of Clark's clothes she had put on the floor when she cleaned out "her" drawers that he had been using while she left. She just had a few more items to pack before she could head over to the Talon for good, not that she wasn't going to take her time. 'I like this room, I'm going to miss it,' she thought to herself._

_Walking over to the closet, she plucked out that pink monstrosity that Dawn Stiles had made her wear to Clark's prom._

_"Meh, I'm not going to wear it, maybe Smallville will," she said with a smirk, putting the dress back in the closest._

_She brushed past a few of his t-shirts before getting to his collection of plaid shirts. Peeking over her shoulder to see if anyone was around, she took out the first shirt. She walked over to the mirror he had in the corner and held the shirt against her front. She peeked over her shoulder again before putting the shirt on over her tank-top. 'No, this isn't the one.'_

_Peeling it off, she grabbed another one of his shirts. It looked alright, so she had to test it's ability to move. 'What? A ninja might attack me in my sleep, I need mobility in my outfits,' she reasoned with herself. She began to dance in font of the mirror, humming a song to herself._

_"Lois?"_

_She froze and turned, finding Martha Kent standing in the doorway._

_"Oh...hi, Mrs. K," she gasped. Martha didn't know what was more red, Lois' face or Lois' shirt._

_"What are you doing, honey?"_

_Lois gulped. "Umm, well, you see, sometimes, it's cold...when I'm sleeping. And uh, well, Smallville, his shirts are so-"_

_"Don't worry Lois, I won't tell him."_

_With a sigh, Lois smiled appreciatively at Mrs. Kent. "Thanks, it's only because they are comfortable. And warm. And stuff. Besides, he needs to wean himself off all this plaid, you know? He's in desperate need of a wardrobe change, I'm just trying to help."_

_Martha nodded with a smile, 'That's the only reason, of course. You keep telling yourself that, Lois,' she thought to herself._

_Once Martha left, Lois let out a big sigh of relief. Turning around, she danced around for a few moments, but decided it didn't smell quite right._

_Whatever that meant._

_Grabbing a third shirt from the closet, she performed the previous tests and then took a big whiff of it's collar._

_'That's the ticket,' she thought. She found a couple more similar shirts to add to her collection, and by a couple, she meant five. She stuffed them carefully in the bottom of her bag, 'I can't afford to have Smallville see this, he would take them back' she thought to herself._

_She picked up her back and walked to the door. She looked over the room. With a smile, she turned off the light and was about to turn around, but a light near the bed caught her eye. Flicking the light back on, Lois walked over to the light and kneeled down._

_It was his Elmer Fudd nightlight._

_Clark claimed he only kept it because he didn't want his mom to be upset. 'Yeah right,' she thought to herself. She had to admit, he looked cute with his fat cheeks lit up and his over-sized red hat. 'Well, if thats the reason, then Farmboy won't miss him, will he?' she thought, pulling it off the wall._

_She put the nightlight in her bag and made her way towards the door. She cast one final look over her, I mean, Clark's bedroom. With a sigh, she turned off the light and made her way downstairs. She was going to miss living at the Kent Farm._

_"I have another bag for you to take to the car, Smallville!"_

Clark started to rub circles on Lois' naked back, causing her to make a sound he wasn't expecting.

"Did you just purr?"

Her eyes shot open. "No."

"Lois, I'm pretty sure you just purred." He had to keep himself still, fighting back a chuckle.

"The only person in this room doing any purring is you, Clark Kent. Last night. All last night."

"I wasn't the only one, Ms. Lane," he reminded her in a very sultry, very non-Clark Kent voice.

If he didn't know any better, he could've sworn he saw her blush. "Shut your face, Smallville."

She rose from the bed, walking over to his closet and plucking his jersey off a hanger.

"You were right about one thing, Lois."

She arched her eyebrows, indicating for him to continue.

"It _was_ the highlight of my life."

For such a sultry voice, and such a suggestive comment, Clark Kent had made that sound awfully sweet.

Lois looked rather shocked for a moment before regaining her composure. She threw the jersey over her head and walked over to the bedroom door before turning back and leaning against the frame. "You ain't seen anything yet, Smallville."

She left Clark with his mouth hanging open, and Clark's Room struggled to find the words to describe what it had seen from these two over the years. But as Clark super-sped to catch up with Lois, it finds exactly the words it's been looking for to describe Lois and Clark: **IT'S ABOUT TIME!**

After all, if you listened very, very closely, that was exactly what Lois said when Clark had caught up with her.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahaha, I hope you guys liked those last couple lines. I really struggled to come up with a 'kill me' moment for this for some reason, and for whatever reason, that idea just came to me. It probably wasn't a very 'kill me' moment, but at least it had the line, haha. Obviously, it's a continuation of the Shelby and Kents scene. The other scene was referenced in 'the Kitchen' if you've been paying attention! haha.

I don't know why I like that 'shut your face' line so much, haha. It just sounds to me like something Lois would say that would sound mean, but they would both know is more of a "not going to admit that you win, but you totally did" line. haha. Anyways, shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Pete Ross_.


	24. Pete

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I like visiting the past when they didn't know or refused to admit that they knew, haha. But I agree, I like the present stuff more. I too love Tess, she is one of my favorite characters on the show, I love that she is playing jump rope with the good-vs-bad line much like Lex did early on. Despite the fact that Lena Luthor is part of the comics, Lutessa Lena Luthor isn't really. That gives her this whole world of possibility that I love watching! She'll have a chapter soon!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - That was what I was thinking, we were all cheering that during Crossfire I think! haha.

_**MegasaurusRex101**_ - She does seem likely to be attacked, doesn't she? haha. And as for the General, I already have a few chapters featuring our favorite military man, so don't you worry, haha. He'll be here quite soon. I think you'll like them too! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I wanted that scene too! haha. Based on 'Ambush' and 'Upgrade', I think Lois is more of a morning person than she likes to admit, haha, so I thought that scene would be appropriate. I hope you like the 'Pete' chapter, it's a bit short and very flashback heavy, but hopefully it's a nice run down memory lane. I agree, he needs some more guy friends. Hopefully Ollie, Bruce, Bart, AC, and J'onn fill that void down the road.

_**tooblind**_ - Aww, that's the sweetest thing anybody has ever said! Thank you! I don't think of Lois being frilly either, but I've been to my share of weddings, and I'm always surprised at how 'frilly' things can get, haha. Not sure there is a non-frilly wedding when it comes to Diana, haha. There was a point in time where I would have gone down that route, with Diana being jealous of Lois and Clark, but the story proposed here in the last ten years or so, I had to go with Diana and Bruce being paired. I'm glad you liked the Lois moments, I loved that cufflink scene too!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I would have agreed, but recent re-runs have made me think maybe differently. When Lois is doing her research on Clark during 'Lazarus' she mentions Pete like she knows him, so they might have met, but it won't matter in this chapter. Hope you like it!

_**sunset**_ - There are just some songs that fit, you know? haha. I loved that scene, especially with the fact they weren't weren't together yet, but she still totally fell in love with him during that episode. One of my favorite moments. I'll have to do a chapter at some point. I agree, she will always be on top when it comes to the teasing and banter, she's like a ninja! haha. I enjoy that added dimension to the chapters as well, it makes it almost feel like those other chapters really happened, doesn't it? haha. I'm glad you liked the 'purr' conversation, and of course Lois was going to come out on top, haha, she's Lois!

Originally speaking, I didn't like Superman because like you said, he was just too powerful. And the idea that the one thing that could hurt him was a piece of his home world from a gazillion miles away, but yet it was freaking everywhere? haha. It just didn't fit. But I really warmed up to the character when I started to read more about Lois, and the Kents, and his relationship with members of the Justice League. And of course, Smallville changed him forever for me. I loved the movies as well, and Christopher Reeve will always be Superman to me, but Tom Welling will always be Clark Kent to me.

I will put my foot down on one thing though, Erica Durance is just the best PERIOD, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hint of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #24, Pete Ross

**Author's Note:** So, this one turned out a bit different than I expected, I'll elaborate on that below. We've got scenes from 'Devoted', 'Facade', and 'Gone' with a reference to 'Krypto'. It probably takes place during Season 4, but it's not too time constricting.

**

* * *

**

Pete had been looking forward to this all week. Clark had called and told him that he wanted to come visit, he had mentioned something about a monster taking up residence at the Kent Farm. Pete was confused, but Clark said he would explain when he got there.

And well, that's pretty much all that Clark had to talk about once he got there.

"And she's taken over my room! I'm going to kill her, Pete! She is driving me crazy!"

From the gist of what Clark had to say, it sounded like some hot girl had taken up residence in his bedroom. Now, Pete didn't consider himself a professional when it came to the softer sex, really he considered himself more of an expert. And in his expert opinion, Clark had a thing for Chloe Sullivan's cousin.

He'd been here half an hour, and Pete hadn't even had a chance to ask about his parents or Lana or Chloe or anything else for the matter.

"Did I tell you that she hit my dog with her car too?"

Pete's eyebrows shot up. He didn't even know that Clark had a dog. Not that he could get in a word to ask about a dog. Clark had already dived into the next portion of his rant about why he hates Lois Lane. Not that Pete bought into that. Maybe another four letter word? Starts with an 'L'?

"She's bossy."

_Dragging Clark by his hand into the Torch, he found himself wondering where all that super-strength had gone when Lois' hand had made contact with his hand out in the hallway. To be completely honest, he was finding himself a bit powerless at the moment._

_He saw her showing him something. "Mandy and Rhonda did a science-fair project together...So?"_

_She gave him an annoyed look. "So? That's our smoking gun. According to the chemistry teacher, they researched a hormone called Phenethylamine."_

_"Phenethylamine?" Reading the papers she handed him, "The Love Molecule."_

_"Exactly."_

_Eyebrow arched, "So, it's a love potion?"_

_"Yeah, but it didn't work."_

_Clark eyed her with caution. When Lois got on a roll, she got on a roll. "Until they added the meteor rock."_

_She looked at him oddly, "Whatever."_

_"We have to find a way to reverse the effect."_

_"Well, it must wear off at some point, otherwise they wouldn't keep juicing the football players."_

_"We don't have enough time. What if another player goes into a jealous rage and hurts someone._

_Now she eyed him with caution. "Wait a minute...you drank some of it too. I saw you. How come you're not going all 'Love Slave'?"_

_Gulp. __"I don't know. What's your point?"_

_"That science report is in Mandy's faux-Prada bag. Presumably, it can tell us how to reverse this, right? And presumably, you're infected. The cheerleaders are having a pool party tonight...How do you look in a swim-suit, Clark?"_

_Damn Lois Lane and her stupid smiles that make me do whatever it is that she wants me to._

"Wait, she got you to do what? With Mandy?"

Clark just nodded quickly and continued. "She's stuck up."

_She never let Clark win anything. Not an argument, not a game, not anything. It was her mission in life to make sure that he was beneath her. Well, wait, no, that was a bad thing. He didn't want to be...you know, beneath her. Hey! He didn't..._

_"I just saw him at practice an hour ago, he was fine."_

_She gave him her usual questioning look. 'Here we go again,' he thought._

_"You sure about that? Think about it Clark, it's the start of a new season, scholarships, the whole town counting on your to be their hero? Who knows what kind neurosis they are hiding under that 'big man on campus' mask."_

_"No way, if anything, Brett was too over-confident. He probably just didn't see you."_

_An eye roll later, she didn't miss a beat. "Yeah, that might explain the broken windshield, but do you want to tell me why he was running around half naked, soaking wet? Who would do that?" A moment later, she was dragging him into the Guy's Locker Room._

_"Hey, hey! Last time I checked, you were missing a few prerequisites for being in here."_

_She actually had the nerve to smile that stupid, stupid, cute cocky smile at him. Wait, what?. "So you have been checking me out?"_

Pete snorted, "I bet you were, man."

Clark glared. "She's rude."

_Legs. Legs. Lots of legs. 'What the hell is she doing in here? Can't she tell I'm in the shower?' he thought furiously._

_"Uh, umm...we usually take turns in the bathroom."_

_"Oh don't start with me, Smallville. You're the one taking the marathon shower. Besides, my delicate feminine sensibilities weren't offended the first time I got a glimpse of uh...Clark Junior." __Crap. _

_"My parents kind of missed the whole Woodstock phase. Besides, they freaked out the last time they caught me in uh, co-ed situation."_

_Crap. 'Why did I mention that? Please don't let her notice. Please don't let her notice.'_

_"Last time? So the Eagle Scout does have a few secrets in the closet." __Crap. _

_"Just forget it alright." He looked up. "That's my shirt!"_

_"It's the only thing that I could find that was clean."_

_He tried to be angry. He really did. 'Why does she have to say it so, so, so, wide eyed and smiley? Stupid Lois and her stupid, stupid smiles that I can't be angry at,' he thought as he tried to get past her. She moved in front of him, because as usual, she had to be in front._

"I bet Mrs. K loved that."

Clark let out a dramatic sigh. "I can't stand her, Pete."

Pete laughed at his friend. For a guy with X-Ray vision, he sure had a habit of being blind. He had seen Clark worked up over a girl before, but he'd never seen him anything like this. And maybe, just maybe, that was a good sign. He certainly wasn't making things work with Lana that way.

"Clark man, can I ask you something without you freaking out?"

Clark nodded.

"What exactly is it that you really want to do with Lois? Kill her, or kiss her?"

"WHAT?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you think? It ended up being a lot less Pete than I thought it would be, but we got some Pete, haha. I was surprised at how hard it was to come up with something for him. I thought this one would write itself, but it ended up being like this. I guess you can now say that it was Pete who started this whole 'kill her or kiss her' notion, I have a chapter set up where Clark tells it to Lois for the first time, it's pretty cute, haha.

I know you guys will probably telling me you want more Pete, so I'll continue to brainstorm ideas, but for now, this was what I came up with. The original idea was more of a Pete meets Lois, but I didn't really come up with much. Maybe that's where I will set the next one. Hope you guys liked it though!

**Next Up:** Probably _Easter._


	25. Easter

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! That shower scene set the Lois and Clark tone for me going forward, haha, loved it.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - That scene in Devoted, I swear, she could have asked him to jump off a bridge and he would have, haha. Not that it would have hurt Clark very much or anything, but he just looks bent to her will, haha. That was what I was thinking for Pete's next chapter, probably something when he meets Lois and realizes everything Clark said is true, minus the hate. Haha. That is a certainly funny idea, I'll have to look into it!

_**sunset**_ - How could you not be provoked by Lois Lane? haha. _That _chapter is soon, I promise. I think Pete left so that Sam Jones III went to do other projects, but I don't know for sure. It was written like the actor left, not like it was the story of character.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Haha, thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments. Jo'an belongs to the wonderful

**Chapter:** #25, Easter

**Author's Note: **Well, not much to say. This one is about the Easter Holiday, which isn't meant to offend anyone who doesn't celebrate Easter. It's mostly just the Easter Egg hunt thing, and for anyone offended just remember one thing, rabbits don't lay eggs...

* * *

"Junior! If you use your x-ray vision one more time, I'm going to-"

"But I wasn't!"

Lois locked her knee and put her hand on her hip, shooting her daughter a glare.

"Ok..."

Clark chuckled from the kitchen. He loved days like this. Chloe and Oliver had come over for the Easter Egg hunt, Jo'an had made them both presents at school and wanted to give them their presents _on _the day of Easter. "_Thats what makes it special, Daddy!_" she had explained.

Her x-ray vision had come in a few weeks ago because as Kara once told him, "_Girls mature faster than boys, Kal-El_," he recalled with a grimace.

It had helped in regards to Boogeymen in the closet or under the bed as she could check for herself, but it made explaining why Mommy and Daddy were wresting a little difficult. Jo'an had a nasty habit of rushing home to check on her mommy. Clark had a nasty habit of being seduced by his wife.

"I swear, Smallville, the kid is as bad as you are."

Clark's head shot up. "What?"

Lois gave him a '_don't-even-try_' look.

"What are you talking about?"

Lois gave him an exhausted look. "Like you don't use your x-ray vision inappropriately all the time."

His jaw dropped.

"When do I use my x-ray vision inappropriately?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe when you're drooling-

"I don't drool."

"-all over your desk when we're at work? Maybe when you need a file from the very bottom drawer that I need to bend _all _the way over."

"Those are important documents, Lois."

"How about that time you said that Diana hurt your back in a sparring session and you made me change that lightbulb?"

"I don't use my x-ray vision on you, Lois!"

Now it was Lois' turn to have her jaw drop in shock.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Everyone's head shot up at that. Oliver had a small smile, he knew where this was going. Chloe looked confused, but one look at her partner, she realized the situation at hand. Clark was confused as hell. Jo'an just had chocolate smeared all over her face.

"Wha..."

"Are you saying that you don't find me attractive enough to peek at?"

Clark was speechless.

"I may have birthed a child, Clark Kent, but I still turn heads."

"Lois, of course you are attractive, you're the most beauti-

"I will have you know that I get hit on damn near everyday."

Clark frowned. "Who hits on you?"

"Why do you care? Apparently, I'm not even desirable enough to peek at, Smallville."

In the living room, Oliver and Chloe were in awe. They didn't know how these two did it. They seemed to be able to turn the simplest things into a bickering match that constantly promised fireworks. Jo'an had just started to realize that her parents were fighting.

'_What? Chocolate is gooooooooooood_,' she thought to herself.

"What's going on?"

"Well Joey, your father is painting himself into a corner."

Jo'an wrinkled up her nose. "What do you mean?"

Seeing Lois backing Clark into the corner of the kitchen with one hand on her hip and one hand poking Clark in the chest, Ollie chuckled.

"Either he is going to have to admit that he's been checking her out-"

"Which Mommy would like."

"She would, normally she'd like it a lot and want to kiss him, she wants him to think she's-

"Ollie," muttered Chloe, warning him about what he might say in front of their niece.

"...pretty. But uh, he would have to admit to peeking at her, so she might kill him."

"Oh..."

"Or he's going to have to keep denying it, which means she's going to kill him because she thinks that means that he doesn't think she's...pretty."

Jo'an thought about it for a moment. "Daddy is a dead man."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I liked that one, haha. Short and sweet? I wanted it to be longer, but I like the way that it flowed and I wanted to end it on that line, so we didn't really get a chance to see the end of Lois and Clark's fight. But hey, maybe we'll see it from another character's perspective in a later chapter!

Hope you like it, shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Christmas Eve_.


	26. Christmas Eve

**Review Comments:**

_**Meg**_ - Haha, i thought about having Clark run for it, but Lois will always be there when he gets back, so he might as well let her kill him and get it over with, hahaha. I'm glad you like Pete's chapter!

_**A,sky**_ - If you liked the last one, I think you'll like this one! And hearing that you guys want to read every day, it just makes this so much more meaningul to me, thank you!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**sunset**_ - Haha, yeah, there's always something crazy going on, funny how Lois is always at the center of it. haha.

_**DreamingInNewYork**_ - There is a continuation scene that also happens very often in real life that will make it even better I suspect, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, as usual, I think Clark is going to die a happy man, haha. There isn't any eggnog or mistletoe in _this _chapter, but I think that you'll get your fix of that during the 'Christmas Day' chapter, hence the distinctions in the title, haha. Also, there _will _be more to Easter in a few chapters where we will see the rest of that fight and some pretty big plot development, haha, if you can call it that in this kind of story.

_**alexindigo**_ - You will get your wish, well, starting today! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois I guess? haha. There isn't much of a pairing, though a pairing led to the main character?

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #26, Christmas Eve

**Author's Note: **I came up with this idea the other day, mostly just Bruce and Ollie competing, and it grew into this. Hope you like it!

* * *

Jo'an woke with a start, hearing a loud bang downstairs. She peeked in her parent's room to see them both still fast asleep. She thought about waking her daddy up, but decided she'd investigate it on her own first. '_I'm a Lane. I can investigate on my own_,' she thought.

Sneaking down the stairs as quietly as she could, she had to stifle a gasp at what she saw.

'_Was that...it couldn't be..._' she thought.

Much to her surprise, it looked like Santa had arrived to bring her presents. Presents! But...wait...is that...another Santa? And why were they so thin? They were backing towards each other, the first Santa was coming from the kitchen while the other Santa was walking back from the front door. The two Santas ran into each other in the living room in front of the tree, and both jumped and pulled down their beards in anger.

'_It's Uncle Ollie and Uncle Bruce!_' she thought.

"What the hell are you doing here?" asked Uncle Ollie.

She saw Uncle Bruce glare at Uncle Ollie. "She is my niece. Of course I was going to come. It was my idea."

"I got here first. Go play in your cave."

There was a loud crash. The two turned to see another Santa.

"Bart?" asked Uncle Bruce.

'_Bobo!_' she thought with glee.

"Hey guys, what are you two doing here?"

"What are you doing here?"

"Being Santa for Jo'an."

"I'm being Santa for Jo'an."

Uncle Ollie smacked Uncle Bruce on the arm. "I was being Santa first."

"Why can't we all be Santa?" asked Bobo.

The other two looked at him like he was crazy.

"There is only one Santa, you moron."

Bobo pulled down his beard. "At least Red is my color."

"You're short enough to be one of Santa's elves," retorted Uncle Ollie.

Bobo glared and gave Uncle Ollie a shove. "At least I don't wear green like an elf."

"Why don't you two take this outside so I can go visit my niece as Santa."

The duo turned on Uncle Bruce. "The hell with that, I got here first, I'm her favorite, I'm being Santa."

"Yeah Bruce, you are Uncle Serious. And what do you mean favorite, Green Bean? I'm freakin' Bobo."

'_Uh oh._'

Now it was their turn to turn on Bobo. '_He is so small though_...' With a simultaneous shove, they sent Bobo to the ground. Jo'an covered a gasp with her hand as Bobo just looked up in shock. Her Bobo was gunna be in troooooooouuuuuuble.

"I am _not_ serious."

"I _am_ the favorite."

"What's going on in here?"

The three Santas turned to see a fourth Santa standing in the kitchen.

"Oh great, Santa Fishstick is here," quipped Bobo.

Uncle AC sighed dramatically, "Been here two seconds, you guys are already starting on the fish jokes."

"Do we really need to explain why, Arthur?" asked Uncle Bruce.

Furrowing his brow and giving Uncle Bruce a shove, "Don't call me Arthur."

"What are you gunna do? Sic Mera on us?" taunted Uncle Ollie.

Uncle AC shot Uncle Ollie a glare. "Oh no! Fishstick is gunna blow up like a Puffer Fish!"

"Shut up..._Bobo_," retorted Uncle AC.

"Look, can we give this a rest? I want to go surprise my niece."

"Hey! Tall, Dark, and Serious, I was here first. I'm going to see her."

"I'm her favorite!" cried Bobo.

"Hey, what am I? Chopped liver?" asked Uncle AC.

"More like a cold fish," quipped Uncle Ollie.

Watching the four Santas argue in her living room, Jo'an shook her head and decided to go back upstairs. She would have liked for them all to have been Santa for her, but now they were busy downstairs arguing instead, wasting her Christmas Eve. She didn't know whether to smack them for being so stupid or kiss them all for being so sweet. With a dramatic sigh, she crawled back into bed and made one decision about the situation:

'_My uncles are idiots_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** I love how they all compete for Jo'an, haha. This was my second 'Lois and Clark'-less chapter, after Jor-El (Clone), but I hope you guys still like it. Lots of secondary characters in this one, which I always think is fun. I guess Oliver isn't _that _secondary but the rest are. Well, tell me what you thought, I'm sure that some would have preferred more Lois and Clark, or you know, any, haha, but sometimes it's nice to do something different.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it, write a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** Gunna have to be a surprise, hahaha.


	27. the Baby

_**Review Comments:**_

_**Meg**_ - Haha, who doesn't love Lois?

_**katlynne**_ - You're here now! That's all that matters! haha. I'm glad you liked it, I love her Uncles! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Thank you for reading each day! I'm sorry I missed yesterday, but I'll be making it up to you guys!

_**sunset**_ - Yeah, I missed Lois and Clark in that one, but there will be a lot of them in the next three chapters, so no worries!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, that was the original ending, the four of them stuck in the stairwell because no one would budge, haha, but I liked ending it on that last line too much to put it in. Maybe there will be a future chapter where that happens, but by the time they get up there, J'onn J'onzz is already up there looking like the true Santa because he can shape shift and phase through walls he wouldn't need to come through the door, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm late too, no worries, haha. I'm growing into a pretty decent sized fan myself, she has great character and her presence amongst some of these guys, especially with the way both myself and Smallville have portrayed them, is comedic gold, haha. The Pete thing was something I was thinking about as well, I was curious how close Clark and Pete would be after all this time. He did ask Oliver to be his best man, that does say something I think about him moving on from his old friends and stuff, I know a lot of people who have asked old friends they haven't seen in years.

I almost had him showing up in a Santa Suit and having them ask why he didn't put his underwear on the outside, haha, but I wanted it to be just the uncles for some reason. I'm glad you enjoyed it, I had a lot of fun writing it.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I was hoping that it would be funny despite being mostly dialogue.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie

**Smallville Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements are used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #27, the Baby

**Author's Note:** I'm so sorry, guys. I finally broke my 'once a day' policy. I found myself stuck away from home without my computer or anything, I just got back a couple of hours ago. Have no fear, you will get your two chapters today to make up for it! I hope you guys like it!

* * *

_Jo'an thought about it for a moment. "Daddy is a dead man."_

Chloe looked at her niece and smiled. This little bundle of trouble was the most adorable thing she'd ever seen. Looking up at her parents, well, she had to be adorable because Lois and Clark were quite the disaster sometimes. Lois was still enraged over him saying he didn't peek at her.

"I work _out_. _Every_. _Day_," she told him, emphasizing the last three words with force.

Clark closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair nervously, '_What did I get myself into this time?_'

"I know Lois, you look gre-"

"Do you think I don't notice Little Jimmy checking me out?"

Clark's eyes narrowed. "Jimmy?"

"Oh come on, Clark. Are those glasses for real now? He is almost as bad as you."

Lois might have continued on, but Clark was busy imagining accidentally setting Jimmy's shoes on fire. Accidentally.

Snapping fingers brought him back to the present. "Wha-"

"Are you listening to me, Smallville?"

In the living room, Oliver was watching with an almost creepily wide smile. Ever since he unofficially partnered up with Hal, Star City was a safer place and he was taking on a larger role in the Justice League as a whole. He had a lot of time on his hands. This was his favorite show.

"Don't enjoy this so much," Chloe told him.

Oliver frowned at her.

"You know why she is being so crazy. When was the last time she was _this _crazy."

Oliver looked confused, but the wheels were turning and suddenly, he found himself gasping.

_Lois stomped into Tess Mercer's office with a terrifyingly scary scowl plastered across her face. To Tess' credit, she didn't flinch or panic. Not even when Lois threw down a file onto Tess' desk and took her 'do-as-I-say-or-I-will-hurt-you' stance. Oliver, on the other hand, nearly jumped under the desk._

_"Can I help you, Lane?"_

_The star reporter shot her an annoyed look. "You know what I want."_

_Oliver's expression turned from one of fear to one of hope. 'This might get a little interesting.'_

_"And what is that?"_

_Lois looked even more annoyed than a moment ago._

_"Cat Grant. Fire her."_

_Oliver's face fell. 'Less interesting.'_

_"And why should I fire one of my reporters? Because Lois Lane said so?"_

_"Obviously."_

_Picking up the folder, Tess flipped through the papers. "What is this?"_

_"Those are her past articles. Her past, crappy, stupid, can't keep her hands off my husband, articles."_

_Oliver would have laughed if he wasn't so scared. Lois Lane was jealous._

_"Can you repeat that?"_

_Lois blew a stray hair out of her face. "Crappy?"_

_"After that."_

_"Stupid?"_

_Tess shot her a look._

_"Look, she is always trying to flash her big, stupid, poke-able eyes at Clark, and I can't take it anymore. I'm going to rip every strand of hair off of her head and stuff them down her throat. Unless you want an insurance case on your hands, I recommend you fire her.__"_

_"Why don't I just fire you instead?"_

_Oliver snorted. "Sorry."_

_"What is really going on here, Lois?" asked Tess with legitimate concern._

_Lois sighed and put her hand on her hip. "I just don't feel like dealing with it, Tess. I'm exhausted and that new chinese food place gave me food poisoning, I've been puking my guts all week. Not to mention my boobs are suddenly freakin' huge, I can't even keep these puppies under control."_

_Oliver wiped a little drool off his face, but otherwise kept his composure._

_"That last thing I need right now is that stupid blonde trying to bat her stupid eyes at my stupid husband. Freakin' idiot doesn't even realize that she's all over him, just thinks she is being friendly. I'd poke out his eyes if I could," she muttered._

_The duo just stared at her, so Lois huffed at turned to leave. "Just fire the bitch, Tess."_

Oliver came out of his little flashback and looked at Chloe in surprise.

"Does he-"

Chloe shook her head and they turned back to the kitchen. "She is always staring at you!"

"She just thinks I'm a great reporter, she is trying to learn from me."

Lois snorted. "She isn't admiring you for being a great reporter, she's admiring you for having a great ass!"

Clark sighed dramatically, "Why are we even arguing about this? I don't care what she thinks of my..." he looks out to see Jo'an, Chloe, and Oliver watching them, "...backside. I only have eyes for you Lois Lane."

Lois arched an eyebrow, "Then you're not looking very closely, Clark Kent."

"What's the supposed to mean."

With a sigh, Lois grabbed the sides of Clark's face. "I'm going crazy because I have another monster inside of me!

The whole room went quiet. Clark looked at her with a puzzled look, but he quickly got it. Chloe's eyebrows were up in her bangs and her lips had never been more tightly pressed together. Oliver appeared to be on the verge of cheering. Jo'an simply whispered with a mouthful of chocolate, "Baby?"

"We're going to have...another? When did you...Oh Lo..."

Lois smiled. Then she glared. Then punched him on the shoulder, and then she kissed him.

"How do-"

Punch. Kiss.

"-not notice-"

Punch. Kiss.

"-these things!"

Punch. Kiss.

Clark smiled at her and pulled her into the air, kissing her with everything he had. They were going to have another baby. Jo'an was going to have a little brother or sister to play with. His family was going to get a little bigger. "I love you, Lois Lane."

"Yeah, yeah, go get some tacos, and some pickles, and oh!" she threw her arms in the arm. "Some of those little chocolate coins, you know, in the tin foil wrappers? Come on, chop chop!" Clark smiled at her, gave his a peck on the lips, and rushed out. _'My Superman,' _she thought.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope you guys like it, and again, I'm really sorry about missing yesterday's deadline. I went on a work-trip that was supposed to bring me back last night (I left yesterday morning at like 4 am), but the highways were closed because we just had an ice-storm. I live in Alaska, and we only have two highways that get us from Fairbanks to Anchorage, one takes about 13-14 hours one-way and the other is in the middle of storm central right now.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked the continuation of the Easter chapter. It was fun to write. Originally, there was a mention of Lois carrying the weight of two and I decided that I wanted to write a second chapter that would be the grand reveal. This might be an opportunity to bring back Emil in a 'baby appointment' type scenario, so I thought that might be fun, though now that I think about it, the nature of this story would have allowed for me to do that with Jo'an if I really wanted to. But either way, I hope you guys liked it and FINALLY we have some Tess Mercer.

I can't believe that it's taken what? Twenty-seven chapters to get her in? Well, I will be posting another story in a little bit. I have two stories handy for it, one features Big Jimmy Olson (Original Jimmy) and one features a visit from the Lanes (Gen. Lane and Lucy), then there is a Tess chapter.

So there is more fun ahead! Write a review, I probably won't get a reply in before I post the next chapter, but I will by Chapter 29 for sure!

**Next Up:** Either '_Big Jimmy_' or '_the Lanes_'.


	28. the Lanes

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - I think it might cause her to be jealous of any woman who looks at Clark? haha. We'll have to expand upon that in future chapters. I admit, she can get a bit stuck on the 'Lois Show', haha, but even Clark should notice she's being crazier than usual! haha. I had read that too, but I'm not sure if we'll be tying across again, I'm not sure we'll see _that _far into the future yet, but who knows! haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - You almost have to hope it's a mini-Clark because he'll really be at a disadvantage with three Lois Lanes, haha.

_**NTonksLupin93**_ - There is a really good chance that we could see more Kitchen scenes, like I said at the time, the original chapter had scenes from the past and what not so we could see that come back around. Tess will be the Chapter after 'Big Jimmy', so you won't have to wait too long! haha. I hadn't thought about doing a Randall or Jeff chapter, those are great ideas!

_**A,sky**_ - I like Cat too, it's a shame she isn't on the show more often. I like her in that non-serious threat to Lois and Clark, but she still fawns over Clark kind of role, if that makes sense? I love me a jealous Lois, especially when she has no reason to be, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - To be honest, I hadn't thought about sex or name at all, mainly because I don't currently have anything planned _that _far in the future, but it's certainly made me think since you and cathy03 brought it up. You'll get your Jimmy fix in the next chapter, so enjoy your Lanes now, haha, I've missed Jimmy too, and I've finally got a chapter I think is worth of my favorite Olsen, haha.

Clark Luthor will appear, I promise, haha. I agree with you, and you'll see Earth-2 Lois and you'll see Earth-2 Lionel as well in chapters as well. I too am looking forward to Emil, and he may be appearing soon than you think, haha, it should be a fun one!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #28, the Lanes

**Author's Note:** To avoid any confusion, this is pre-Jo'an and not a conversation about the _new _baby. Anyways, have fun!

**

* * *

**

"I hope it's a girl."

Lois and Clark looked up from the couch at Lucy. The General simply growled. "I hope it's a boy."

"Why? Girls are so cute! Boys are just trouble."

Both Clark and the General snorted. Both Lois and Lucy glared.

"I think if we have a girl, she is going to be a little me. I don't think I can handle that," said Lois.

Clark frowned. "I think that would be great, how could I not love the idea of another you?"

Lois laughed and leaned in so that only Clark could hear her. "You already knocked me up, no need to keep up the flattery."

Clark could tell that the General knew what she had said, which just made his cheeks even redder.

"I had two girls, Clark. I'd take it as a kindness if you could provide me with a grandson."

Gulp.

"I'll uh...I'll do my best, sir."

Lucy leaned forward on the couch, "but Clark, I want a little niece. Don't you think a little Lois with your eyes with be the cutest?

Clark laughed nervously, "She would...uh, she would be cute alright, but I don't know how much I can sway. Lois might-"

"Lois might what?"

Gulp. Clark looked at his wife. "You might, you know, have more say over it than I do."

Lois arched an eyebrow.

"It's not a recipe that I can adjust to suit you, Mr. Kent."

"Me? Hey, I'm not...it's your...I'm happy with...I just want a healthy baby, Sweetie."

Lois eyed him. "Good answer."

The General eyed the couple with a smile. He was happy about the way things turned out for his little Lo. Sure, he thought Clark was a bit too pro-vigilante for his liking. But Clark Kent was a good man and he was a good partner for his daughter. He was enough of a foil for Lois that he kept her in check, she was prone to the impulsive blunder, but he'd never stand in the way of her dreams and he'd always be there to protect her.

He hadn't come out and said it, but he knew that there was much more to Clark Kent than met the eye. He knew that the Blur had to have been well aware of what was going on in Lois' life to have saved her all that time ago. He knew that either the Blur was the world's greatest stalker, or someone very close to Lois, whether Lois knew it or not. He also knew if you squinted really hard at Superman, he looked all too familiar.

"Well, if it's a boy, I'm sure he'll be as handsome as you are, Clark."

Lois frowned at her sister. Did she always have to openly flirt with Clark when she stormed into town? Lois shot Clark a look, almost as if to tell him that he was going to have to choose his next words very carefully if he wanted to be alive when this baby came.

"With Lois' genes, how could I drag down this child's good looks?"

The General's jaw nearly dropped. Lois had trained him well.

Lucy looked amused as Lois leaned into Clark to show him he passed. For a moment, Clark looked triumphant.

"Have you thought about how you will handle your busy schedules and raising a child? Will you quit you job, Lois?"

Lois looked at her sister as if she was crazy. "No, I'm not going to be leaving the planet, I'm sure we will manage."

"Yeah, I have some friends that would be more than willing. My friend Bart-"

"He is not going to be running around with my child, he is practically a kid himself. Nope. Not happening. He will be no where near my child, he just runs in circles and stuffs his face. Not happening."

Clark gave her a surprised look. "Ok, well, I'm sure there will be plenty of volunteers."

"I could always move in and babys-"

"No."

The trio looked at Lois. "I mean, Luce, you don't want to be tied down watching a kid, you're young! You should be out...doing...stuff!"

Lucy shot Lois a challenging look, the General chuckled. Lois hadn't grown any less protective of her husband, and that made him smile. He liked that she was so protective because it meant that she really cared about Clark, just as both himself and Clark were protective of her.

The General was certain about one thing: Superhero or not, Clark Kent loved his daughter more than anything. And that was more than enough for him to be happy about the couple starting a family together, but he knew even superheroes have their limits.

"I'm going to let you in on a little secret, Clark."

Clark leaned in.

"You want a boy."

Giving him a look, the General continued. "You want a boy, because the Lane women, they will run all over you. It's not about you specifically, it's just that they've got these big puppy dog eyes and this innocent little charm, but just when you think they're going for a kiss, they'll strangle you."

He clapped Clark on the shoulder with a smile. Clark laughed, but after a moment, Clark had only one thing to say: Gulp.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? Since this was a coupled chapter, we will see the General and Lucy each on their own in separate chapters up ahead. I already have Lucy's chapter mapped out, though I'm always willing to hear ideas and what not. Now, I know everyone is excited about the idea of a second child, but like I said above, this is pre-Jo'an and that's why we have that little joke about Bart and their kid. How wrong Lois will be, haha.

In other news, I have decided that I'll be ending this story at fifty chapters. That will give me about 20 chapters to round out the final characters, locations, and holidays while giving us a reasonable cap. I'll still be writing on FanFiction, but I felt like giving us a cap ahead of time would make it easier when the time comes. I hope everyone has, is, and will enjoy this as much as I have been and will, haha.

**Next Up:** _'Big Jimmy' Olsen_.


	29. Big Jimmy

**Review Comments:**

_**meg**_ - Already in the works for the 'Fathers Day' chapter, haha. And yeah, it is sad, but I was talking to another writer who said that it's better when it's known in advance instead of the writer just stopping and everyone gets all upset. I'm happy you've stuck around for the long haul and I'm looking forward to you sticking around for a while longer, this was been so much more fun than I ever imagined!

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - Hmmmm, I hadn't thought about Hawkman. I'll have to work one out. That's a good idea.

_**A,sky**_ - Well, don't wait any longer, haha, enjoy!

_**cathy03**_ - I'm looking forward to writing them! The General is a fun character to write, I can't believe he hasn't been around more. He is a lot like Jimmy and Tess in that way, I love writing them but they never seem to show up naturally like the others do.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chimmy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #29, 'Big Jimmy' Olsen

**Author's Note: **This chapter takes place directly before 'Crimson'.

**

* * *

**

He could tell by the look on Lois' face, she was having a hard day.

You could smell that coffee breath a mile away and the scowl she wore said she was going to disembowel anyone who annoyed her. Jimmy could understand why after all. Lois had just broken up with Oliver Queen, that billionaire playboy from Queen Industries.

Lois growled in response.

"Gotcha."

Jimmy tried to think back to the last time he'd seen Lois with a smile on her face. The thought brought him back to Movie Night a couple nights ago.

_Lois was laying across the couch, arm draped over her face and feet in Clark's lap. Chloe had forced the duo to come over for a Movie Night at the Talon, the key word being 'forced'. Chloe had chosen "Serenity" to watch, but neither Lois or Clark were excited about the idea._

_"Who really believes that people could jet around in spaceships, Chlo?"_

_"I'm with Lois on this one. These guys look like cowboys. There aren't any cows in space."_

_Jimmy frowned, he knew that on those rare moments with Lois and Clark were on the same team, they were unbeatable._

_"Come on, you two! Who doesn't love cowboys? Who doesn't love spaceships? This puts them together! It's like Rocky Road, it's a perfect mix."_

_Lois seemed to brighten at the mention of her favorite ice-cream._

_"But I don't like Rocky Road."_

_The three of them stared at Clark. "What the hell, Smallville? Who doesn't like Rocky Road? It's freakin' delicious."_

_"I'm more of a Vanilla kind of guy."_

_"Yeah, Vanilla, also known as the most boring flavor in the world!" After a moment, Lois smiled. "Yeah, I guess that suits you."_

_Now Jimmy was rolling his eyes. 'We will never get to watch the movie now.'_

_But as Chloe snuggled into his side, he didn't really care. He had his girlfriend. He had his best guy friend. And he had his best female friend. And from the look on Chloe's face, she had her favorite show: the Lois and Clark show. It made him smile because while he had always been a little, ok, a lot insecure about the relationship between Chloe and Clark, she seemed to enjoy seeing the sparks fly between Lois and Clark._

_Sparks._

_He looked up to see Lois now up on her knees to reach Clark's eye level. "Everything about you is boring! From your plaid to your farmer boy ways to your stupid preference in girls and in ice cream!"_

_Jimmy couldn't tell if Lois was smiling because she thought she was winning, or because she was happy to be arguing with Clark._

_"Well, we can't all be Lois Lane, the magnet of trouble and cocky rich boys."_

_"Jealous, Smallville?"_

_"Of Oliver Queen? In your dreams, Mad Dog. I could live without your smelly bunny slippers."_

_Lois mocked offense. "How dare you, Mr. Fudd!"_

_Chloe chimed in, "Mr. Fudd?"_

_Clark paled, "Nothing." He glared at Lois. "It's nothing, right Lois?"_

_Lois smirked and poked Clark in the chest. "Admit Rocky Road is the best, or I'm going to spill."_

_Clark glared at her and muttered something under his breath._

_"What was that, Smallville?"_

_Clark let out a dramatic sigh. "Rocky Road it the best. Happy?"_

_Lois leaned in close enough that Clark felt her breath on his lips, but poked him on the nose. "I am now."_

_She sat back down, but Jimmy noticed that Lois had managed move from sitting on the far side of the couch from Clark to sitting right next to him with an empty seat to her left. They were now sitting very close, and Clark had his arm stretched behind her against the top of the couch._

_Jimmy thought about it for a moment, and he felt a plan form in his head. They looked like a couple relaxing on the couch on double-date-night. They had that comfortable thing between them that Jimmy never saw them have with anyone else. Then he thought about what he just saw._

_A minute ago, Lois looked about ready to kill Clark. A second ago, she looked like she was going to kiss him._

There were some serious sparks flying around that night, and it wasn't the first time he'd ever seen it either. Lois and Clark just seemed to go together in a weird way. They were so different, but sometimes you want someone that fills the blanks and gaps, not just someone who overlaps over the same qualities and the same interests. Lois and Clark had that, they completed each other, and oh man, there were sparks.

He decided then and there, he was going to get Lois and Clark to see the light. They had electric chemistry that even they can't deny. And if it helped him with Chloe in the process, all the better. "Hey Lois, you got any plans for Valentine's Day?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** And there we have it, Big Jimmy Olsen has returned, haha. After that, I'm going to try and go out of my way to write a few chapters set when he was alive just so that I can write him again. He is a fun character to write and obviously, he saw it coming the whole time, haha.

I hope everyone liked it, I thought about doing flashbacks, but I went with this new scene instead because I wanted it to be a "hey, Lois and Clark would be great together" type chapter and 'Crimson' seemed like the obvious choice. Only problem is that it constricts on most Clois + Jimmy scenes that were on the show, so I went with the new stuff instead. Hope you guys liked it, shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** _Tess Mercer_.


	30. Tess

**Review Comments:**

_**MegasaurusRex101**_ - I can't remember where that ice-cream thing came from. There was a great story I read forever ago about Wild Cherry ice cream and for some reason I remember Rocky Road, I can't remember if either was on the show, but I liked it, so I threw it in, haha.

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - That is one of my all-time favorite lines! haha. I was like "Whoa! Jimmy say what?" haha. We'll see plenty of Lois and Tess here and in the future, I'm going to make an effort to include more Tess and Jimmy in future chapters.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks!

_**katlynne**_ - Thanks you, keep on reading! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It won't be the last time we see him squirm, i promise! haha. I have a couple ideas for the General, the hard thing (as it is with all of the characters), is finding an idea that can fill a whole chapter, but I think I have at least one or two up my sleeve, haha. I have a few ideas for Lucy, but those are fantastic ideas, I really like them, haha, especially the bachelor party idea. And the great thing about that one is that it can be in another person's chapter too! haha. I'm going to try and get some more Big and Little Jimmy in the next few chapters, I hear you loud and clear, haha.

I have about three or four Lex chapters in the works, so you'll see him soon, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Thank you!

_**clarkfan325**_ - I'm not going to lie, I like writing the original stuff a little more, but both are a lot of fun.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I'll see what I can work in, that is a great idea.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Hal/Tess

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #30, Tess Mercer

**Author's Note:** This one takes place post-Season 10 I suspect, probably after Chloe and Oliver break up since he's spending a lot of time in Star City as referenced in this chapter. I hope you guys enjoy it, it's kind of an unusual one to me for some reason.

* * *

Clark Kent was a sexy farmboy.

She had always thought so. Ever since she awoke in his strong arms after that bus explosion years ago. She wasn't afraid to admit it to anybody. Anybody but Lois Lane. She wasn't afraid of fighting Lois, but the idea of fighting Lois _after_ she heard Tess utter those words? Yeah, she'd pass.

So when Lois accidentally caught her saying something, well, ambiguous about the mild-mannered Daily Planet Heart-Throb, Tess had conjured up some story about having another stud. She was feeling victorious about her deceit, so she didn't see what was coming next.

"Well you ought to bring him on a double date with me and Clark!"

Tess was vaguely certain that Lois was trying to call her bluff. Now, they both knew that Tess would never pursue Clark, but that didn't mean that Lois didn't like putting a girl in her place when she talked about Lois' man so flippantly.

And that's how Tess ended up here. In a fancy restaurant with Lois Lane and Clark Kent. On a date with Hal Jordan, one of the Green Lanterns.

"Well, who woulda thought? Red and Green," laughed Lois. "Do we get to call you the Christmas Couple?"

Clark put a hand on Lois' knee, "Lo..."

Lois rolled her eyes and looked at her menu, Clark was such a party-pooper sometimes.

"So, Hal, how's uh, how are things going in Star City?"

"Well, you know how it is working with Oliver. He can be a bit hard headed, but we're uh, we're cleaning things up."

Clark smiled. Hal and Ollie had formed quite the partnership, focusing a great deal on the inner-cities and providing hope for those living there. Oliver didn't have the kind of abilities that someone like Hal or Clark had, so he was focusing on cleaning things up on a social level. Ollie had a habit of losing his head in the heat of things, someone like Hal, someone with the law-and-order willpower, really made a great team.

"That's great."

"Yeah, yeah, work is great. When did this shindig get off the ground?" Lois interrogated.

Tess arched an eyebrow. "We like to keep our private lives...private."

"Oh come on, Tess, I'm your star reporter, give me an exclusive."

"Lois, do I like this?" Clark pointed to the menu, trying to distract her.

"You're a growing farm boy, you like everything. So how did you two meet?"

Clark chuckled, Tess rolled her eyes. Hal coughed nervously, "Uh, well, we met through Oliver, you know. From when I joined the League."

"Of course. Of course."

"How did, how did you two meet?" he ventured.

Lois smiled widely. This was her favorite story. Clark closed his eyes, waiting for it to be over.

"I ran over Clark with my car. He was naked."

Hal laughed, but then realized that she was totally serious. "Oh, well, that's uh, that's nice. Sounds exciting."

Clark took a large drink of water, "Yeah, she talked a lot."

"You weren't holding up your end of the conversation."

"I was hit by a car."

"You're an alien."

"Anyways, I think I'm going to have to the Chicken," said Tess, ending their little banter.

When they left the restaurant, Hal and Tess went one way while Lois and Clark went the other. They were barely a block apart when Hal finally started to laugh out loud. Tess looked at him like he was crazy. "What the hell was that?" he asked.

"What was what?"

"That. With Clark and Lois. Are they always like that?"

"Yes."

"Are they like, on the verge of a breakup or something?"

Tess looked at him wildly. "What?"

"They bickered the whole dinner, I thought they were going to kill each other."

A block away, Lois was hopping up and down like an impatient child. "What are they saying? What are they saying?"

Clark laughed at his fiancee, every time they went on a double date, she made him listen for their 'review' as she called it.

"Hal thinks we wanted to kill each other. He thinks we are going to break up."

Lois frowned. "Are we that bad?"

It was Clark's turn to frown. "Lois-"

"Do we argue too much?"

Clark shook his head. "Lois, we're just not like other couples. It's not that simple."

Lois hung her head a little bit, but Clark picked up her chin.

"What makes us work, is that we aren't simple. A lot of couples think a fight or an argument means they aren't happy, that they don't work. But we know that sometimes a fight or an argument is just showing how much we care about each other. It's our thing. We work because half the time we want to kiss each other and the rest of the time we want to kill each other," Clark chuckled.

"Huh?"

Clark chuckled. "It's something Pete said a long time ago. I was telling him about you for the first time, and at the end of my rant, he asked me if what I really wanted to do was kill you or kiss you."

Her nosed wrinkled up at him. "If anything, it's you."

"What?"

"You are infuriating, Clark Kent. Sometimes, I really don't know if I want to kill you or kiss you."

Clark smiled at her, pulled her close, and kissed her on the forehead.

"I guess it's our 'Kill Me or Kiss Me' charm that brought us together."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I love Tess Mercer and I think Cassidy Freeman is gorgeous, maybe there is a connection there. Haha. Even though I'm quite certain the record is hardly set in stone regarding her official "goodie or baddie" status and she _is _a Luthor, I like to think she'll be a good guy in the end. I hope that you liked the way that it ended, finally we see the first time the two talked about the 'Kill Me or Kiss Me' charm.

I hope you guys liked it, I know it wasn't really a comedy but it wasn't really a dramatic chapter either. The reason this one took so long was because I couldn't figure out to add to their 'date', but since it was chosen to be Hal, you can bet there will be a future chapter where we see dinner go that much longer and possibly even how Hal and Tess met, so look out for that one.

Originally, I thought the very last chapter would be this chapter (Lois and Clark talking about the title), but obviously that's not the case, haha. I hope you don't mind if I stick around for a little while longer, haha. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Bart Allen_.


	31. Bart

**Review Comments:**

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Haha, that's what I was thinking.

_**cathy03**_ - Lana is a close second, but I think she was just feeling a twinge of jealousy and wanted to make him feel bad, haha. Escape was my inspiration for the scene to be honest, haha. And yeah, Hal just seemed like the only person within the League to go with, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - I kind of picture Lois always taking advantage of Clark's abilities in fun ways, haha. Pickle Jar opening, fire place lighting, review listening, haha. There will probably be a lot more dinner date type of chapters, haha, they're a lot of fun to write.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I had an idea for the bachelor party, so it slides right in perfectly, haha. I don't think anyone saw Tess and Hal coming, especially yours truly, haha, I just kind of winged it at the last moment. I've run out of my stockpile of chapters so it's like I'm writing a chapter right before I post. I needed someone for Tess to go out with, I had the start and the ending already written, and I winged it with Hal Jordan being her date, haha.

I think you might find this Bobo and Jojo story familiar, haha.

_**sunset**_ - The Date chapter will come up very soon with another special guest or two, haha. I don't know if I can do 70, we'll see how I'm feeling at the end of 50, I won't lie, it's hard to imagine not keeping up with this story. I'm not burned out, the passion shines brightly, haha, more like having a hard time keeping up with the post a day system as well as the quality of writing, haha. But I will keep it up, and we see where we are in twenty more chapters, haha.

You might have guessed right on the guest-star for this one though, hahaha. ENJOY!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Smallville Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #31, Bart Allen.

**Author's Note: **This one is a continuation of the Jo'an chapter from earlier, written in collaboration with the wonderful mygyps17. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

"Go help him."

"You go help him."

"He's your friend, Bobo!"

"He's your daddy, Jojo!"

"I can't go over there! She'll kill me too!"

"Exactly, you're her daughter. She loves you. What do ya think she would do to _me_ if she would kill you?"

Jo'an scowled at her uncle. _He's_ a superhero. It's his _job_ to help people live. And since her mom's about to kill her daddy, Bart Allen should be helping him…no matter the consequence. "Fine!" Jo'an relents. She's not going to just sit back and let her daddy die. She loves him.

"Wait!" Bart calls after the child and speeds in front of her. He can't let his niece go in there like that. _He's_ the superhero. She's too young. She's got a full life ahead of herself. He'll go. He'll sacrifice himself for her. But just this once.

By the time that Bart gets there, Lois is standing in front of Clark and yelling at the girl with, uh, pretty eyes.

"Look here, Lady, this is mine. He's my husband. He's the father of my daughter. And he sure as hell is my hero. You go take you drowning crap to the other side of the lake, or I'm going to drown you myself. Got it?" Lois glared at her. "So you better take your fake hair, fake nails, and fake boobs to the other side of the lake!"

The woman looked at Lois with an insulted expression. "Are you implying that I-"

"No, I'm saying you were. I'm Lois Lane, I know when somebody is trying to feed me a story."

Clark tried to put his hand on her arm to calm her, but she shook him off. "He-" Lois smacked Clark on the chest. "is mine." She pointed to herself.

"F...F...Fine!" she squealed, stomping away from Lois and Clark.

Clark put a hand on Lois' arm, "Lois-"

"And you! Must you help every floozy with a damsel in distress screech?"

Bart gulped. He was nervous about getting in the middle of this, but Jo'an gave him a little shove.

"Uh, Lois, don't you think Clark was just trying to help."

A look silenced him. Bart Allen was not going to go toe-to-toe with Lois Lane.

"You need to open your stupid little eyes, Smallville! That, that, that bimbo was not drowning! She just saw a prime piece of man-meat and decided to pop on a bib!"

"Lois, how am I supposed to-"

"Oh, I don't know, how about when she was bobbing her head up to look DIRECTLY at you? How about that? Tiny clue?"

Bart watched Lois take a step towards Clark, but not even the Steel Bundle of Trouble was going to push him in between the couple.

"The only woman you need to give mouth-to-mouth to is standing right in front of you!"

Clark looked around nervously, they were making a scene.

"It's not like I _wanted _to give her mouth-to-mouth-"

"Oh, I know that."

Clark looked at her confused. Bobo and Jojo shared an equally confused look.

"You do?"

Lois grabbed him by the neck and jerked him to her level. "Yeah, I know that." She promptly laid on him one of the steamiest kisses he'd ever received. And when she was done, Clark had to regain his composure and his ability to stand as his Legs of Steel became more like Legs of Jelly.

"Wa...wa...wow."

Lois looked at him smugly. "We both know nobody else is going to turn the Man of Steel into putty."

Bart looked down at his niece with a smug expression. "I told you she was going to kiss him."

"Grown ups are stupid," she mutters, walking back to their spot by the water.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how about that one? haha. Obviously this was a continuation of the mygyps17 chapter, "Jo'an", and mygyps17 did write the intro. I thought it was a fun little one, even if it's a little short. I love seeing the Bobo-Jojo show, haha, it's one of my favorites!

Let me know what whatcha thought, write a review!

**Next Up:** _Gunna Have To Be A Surprise_.


	32. Talon

**Review Comments:**

_**meg**_ - The thing about Lois and Clark is that, in the end, she'll always end up kissing him. Haha. It might take a little while, and it might take Clark getting creative with the begging or bribing her with chocolate, but those two always end up together. That's what makes them Lois and Clark.

_**A,sky**_ - Funnily enough, you will get to see the Talon. Right now! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I love that too! haha. The Man of Steel getting manhandled by Lois Lane? That's always awesome, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Man of Mush, haha, I like that! I might have to steal that down the line, haha. mygyps17 has been wonderful with all of this, it started out with just one little line about Oliver and Bruce arguing about being the favorite uncle and it's turned into a full on cross-over at times, haha. Didn't see that coming. There have been a few episodes where Lois has snuck up on Clark or been able to pull him here and there, so I like to think he's a bit powerless around her, haha. Powerless sounds like a bad thing, more like abnormally comfortable, haha. So I think a Lois Lane kiss would probably make him exactly what you said, the Ma of Mush, hahaha.

_**Gladius Grim**_ - I've actually been trying to come up with a few chapters like that, it's kind of hard though because jealous men aren't received all that well, I've got to do it just right so that it can be funny. Jealous Lois is just funny. Jealous Clark can come across as possessive and jerk-like if you're not careful, haha, but I am working on it! I promise we'll see a few chapters exactly like that, just have to get the right tone and situations, haha.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, well, I think that's just what mygyps17 and myself have been going for, we want you guys to come back for more! haha. Like I was telling Gladius Grim up above, I'm working on a few Jealous Clark chapters, it's just really hard to make him come across as funny instead of like a douche, hahaha. Which is normally really hard to make Clark look like, because lets face it, he's like the nicest guy in the world, haha. But a few lines of Jealous Clark, and I'm like "eeeek", haha.

I hadn't seen that comic, but that's a really cute idea, haha. I'm going to have to think about that one, haha, I like it.

_**katlynne**_ - Aww, thank you! I hope you enjoy this little flashback then, it was fun to write!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Lexana, and Chloe/OC

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #32, the Talon

**Author's Note: **It was requested, and here it is: the infamous Talon! I think you guys are going to like this one.

* * *

"Hell. No."

Chloe frowned and gasped. "Lois, I never ask you to do anything."

"But...but...it's freakin' Smallville!"

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean? I should be offended about dating you!"

Lois growled. "It's not a date."

"It's a fake date. That's all I need. That's all I want. That's all you two have to do. Pretend! For an hour!"

Lois and Clark exchanged looks of disgust. "An hour?" they groaned in unison.

Chloe would have laughed if she wasn't afraid of them killing her. For two people that are acting absolutely mortified at the idea of spending time together, they spent more time together than they did with anyone else. "Preeeeeettttttyyyyyy "?

She knew that would make them cave.

"Fine, but if Smallville makes a move on me, I'm kicking his ass."

"Says the one that gave me a lap dance!"

"Says the one that snuck up on me when I was naked!"

"I was trying to protect you!"

"Yeah, right, that's _exactly _what you were doing. It's not like you were trying to even the score for Clark Junior."

Chloe watched the duo banter all the way back to the truck. She needed to go home and prepare for her date with Marshall, a nice boy she had met at the Daily Planet despite the nagging voice in the back of her head talking about a certain bow-tied individual.

She shook her head to clear herself of the thoughts. '_Traitorous thoughts_' she accused.

Marshall was very shy, so Chloe figured that having another couple would help him feel a little less nervous. She originally intended on asking Lana and Lex, but Marshall paled considerably at the idea of dining with _the _Lex Luthor. With everyone else either single or already having plans, she turned to to two people who couldn't say no to her to pretend to be a couple for an hour. It had taken some convincing and a whole lot of puppy dog eyes, but they said yes eventually.

Of course, it didn't take very long for the bickering to show up. Luckily, Marshall found it funny instead of suspicious.

"They have chemistry," he explained. "They remind me of one of those back-and-forth couples, like Hepburn and Tracy."

Lois and Clark just stared at him, gritting their teeth, neither liked pretending to be a couple.

"Yeah, Smallville is lucky to have a lass like me."

Clark arched an eyebrow. "Yeah, there aren't many girls that like Monster Truck Rallies and Tequila."

Lois grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him in close for what she described as a "snuggle", only Clark was aware of the vice-grip she had on his neck skin.

"And there aren't many men who like plaid _this _much, Marsh."

Marshall grinned widely. They had him totally convinced of their couple-ness. Chloe was no fool though, and even if things didn't work out with Marshall, she was never going to forget this little act. "I guess you could say that they are like two pieces of a very colorful puzzle," joked the Blonde.

The look that Lois shot Chloe was somewhere between a smirk and a snarl.

"Yeah, but like two of those pieces that don't quite fit, so you could say that Smallville kind of beneath me."

Chloe and Marshall tried to contain smiles. Clark went completely red. Lois looked between them all, "Wait? What? I mean, that's not-"

"What Lois means, is that we make it work."

The trio looked to Clark. "Yeah, we make it work," Lois confirmed. She shared an unusual with Clark, Marshall suspected she might kiss him, but quickly went back to giving him a hard time. "It's just a commentary on how wonderful I am, anybody else would overload on how much of a farmboy this one is!"

Clark narrowed his eyes at her. "She says that, but we both know I just can't be in the house all that often because I can smell her horrible bunny slippers."

"You did not just go there!" she screeched.

Chloe was vaguely certain that Marshall was unaware of her presence at this point, he was absolutely mesmerized by Lois and Clark.

"I will throw out the plaid if you throw out the bunny slippers!"

"Never!"

Clark leaned over to Chloe's date, "I told you she liked my plaid."

Across the room, Lana looked on in amusement as she and Lex waited for their coffee. Lois and Clark were like fire and gasoline. Anytime they were together, there were explosions and destruction in their wake. Her and Lex had been watching, Lex found the friendship between Lois and Clark very interesting. When the waitress brought them their coffee-to-go, Lana pointed to the table. "Can you imagine Lois and Clark going on a real date?" Lana laughed before walking out of the Talon.

Lex looked back to see Lois and Clark bickering again. "They just did. They just don't know it yet."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think of that? Brought us back to Banter-Clois and we even got some nice Lex, anybody else miss those days? haha. Not that I'm unhappy with Lex turning evil and Clois being more fluffy than before, but it's nice to return to those days. I know the 'Kill Me or Kiss Me' moment was kind of weak, but the whole 'Marshall suspected she might kiss him, but quickly went back to giving him a hard time' thing just seemed appropriate given that they wouldn't actually nearly kiss at this point in time, haha. Hopefully it still works for what we needed here.

Anyways, shoot me a review, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Arthur Curry_.


	33. Arthur

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks!

_**katlynne**_ - Yeah, I'm really happy to it sounds like Michael Rosenbaum is considering coming back to finish the show. Superman isn't Superman without Lex Luthor, and Smallville isn't Smallville without Michael Rosenbaum. All the clones in the world won't fill that gap, so I'm happy he's at least considering it.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, I love our current Clois just as much as I love the old Clois. It's Apples and Oranges really for me. As for the PDA, I like to think that it's just because Clark is very traditional in that way, haha. I know a lot of guys who were raised thinking PDA wasn't appropriate and what not. It's weird to me, but it's the way they are, haha. I'm honestly more of a PDA kind of guy and I've written them as such probably, so there's that. I'll tell you a secret, I don't miss the Talon either, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I like the line because it was a call...forward? haha, a reference to her line from in the future in 'Patriot'? haha. I agree, I like the old Lex too even though I know we have to have Evil Lex at the same time. Hopefully I can squeeze in some more Good Lex because I have a few Evil Lex chapters ahead. We will most definitely be getting a Perry White chapter, no doubt about it. I want to do a Zod chapter, love him, but he's a tough one. And thanks, I will use that 'Man of Mush' line! haha.

_**Gladius Grim**_ - I gotcha, I gotcha. Well, there will be a couple chapters like that I suspect. I can't let Lois win them all! haha.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, poor Chloe. I hadn't thought about doing 'Aqua', but now that you mention it, I might have to. I've been thinking about doing a run through the heroes again by using their 'Hero Name' to avoid a 'Bruce II' type situation, maybe that's what I'll do for 'Aquaman', good thinking! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, AC/Mera, Lucy/Little Jimmy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #33, Arthur Curry

**Author's Note: **In case it's not clear, this is Clark's bachelor party. Obviously, it's set post-Season 10. Enjoy!

* * *

"I don't think I'm going to drink tonight," Arthur announced.

Bart and Clark exchanged looks, trying not to laugh. Oliver leaned over to Bruce, "Let's hope that's the case." Bruce grimaced.

The Bachelor Party was a traditional part of the journey to "I do." Clark wasn't really keen on it, Lois was a little less than keen than Clark. Ok, you got me. Lois was a lot less keen than Clark was. But Oliver smiled his little smile and Bruce batted his stupid puppy dog eyes, her judgement was compromised.

Little Jimmy screeched across the floor, "This is going to be awesome, CK! Your friend Oliver really knows how to party!"

Oliver had rented out the Ace of Clubs and they had a live band coming to perform. "Did you know Henry used to work here?" called Jimmy.

Clark grimaced. He remembered it vividly. He had gotten shot when Big Jimmy was the bartender here. "Yeah, buddy, it was a blast."

"I'm serious, Bro. Mera was pissed at New Years. I'm just having punch tonight."

**Thirty Minutes Later**

Arthur ran past them wearing what appear to be glow-in-the-dark jewelry, screaming "Oh-we Oh! O-we Oh!" while waving two glow sticks back and forth.

"Did you spike the-"

"Oh yeah," chuckled Bart. Clark grimaced.

Letting out a sigh, "You remember what happened at New Years."

Bart waved his arms. "That was his whole, 'I swim faster naked' thing. How was I supposed to know he thought he'd party harder naked?"

"Mera is going to kill him," Clark laughed.

"Hey Clark."

He turned to see Lucy Lane in what appeared to be a, uh, well, it was a naughty nurse outfit. Bart's eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"Hi...uh...Lucy, what are you, what are you doing here? In that?"

Lucy sauntered on over to Clark and stood far too close for comfort, Clark couldn't help but gulp. "I'm here for the party."

"Well, it's kind of..." Clark shuddered as Lucy ran a finger down his jaw. "It's kind of a guys only thing."

Lucy pushed herself close to him. "You don't want a little company?"

Clark swallowed, pushing Lucy away. "Not this kind of company, Lucy. You know that I love your sister."

"But Clark..." Lucy gave him a pout. "I have always had the _biggest_ crush on you."

With a smile, Clark put a hand on her shoulder. "I know what you're trying to do, Lucy, and I'm not going to fall for it. I appreciate what you're trying to do for Lois, but I think we both know that I'm very much in love with her, and only her."

"But I will totally take you," quipped Bart, who had been frozen in place this whole time.

Lucy shot Bart a disgusted look before eyeing Clark. He had turned her down. Again. She looked like she was going to kill him.

Suddenly, she sprung up and kissed Clark on the cheek. "Good boy."

He really did love her sister, so she was willing to let him marry her. She had to test him, Lois is her sister after all. And if he had failed? Well, she would have enjoyed the hell out of it. Clark Kent was one sexy hunk of farmboy meat. Lucy spotted Clark's little friend from the Daily Planet over Clark's shoulder.

"Come on, Bowtie. Let's dance."

Clark patted Bart on the shoulder, "Plenty of the fish in the sea, Pal. Plenty of fish in the sea."

"Yeah there is!"

The duo turned around to see Arthur dancing on the bar.

"Mera is sooooooooo going to kill him," laughed Bart.

**The Next Day**

She reached over, hitting flesh. Lucy's eye popped open. Her vision was still blurry, but she could make out an orange-ish color laying next to her. When her vision cleared enough to see what was in her bed, she gasped and fell out of bed. Popping her head up, she whispered, "Bowtie?"

Little Jimmy wiped the sleep from his eyes, "Lucy?"

In unison, they whispered the same statement: "Lois is going to kill me."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahahaha, I think I found my new favorite pairing, haha. I didn't even know that they were together in the comics until writing this interest peaked my interest and I checked out her profile on DC Wikia. Learn something new everyday, haha. Well, I hope you guys liked it, I always intended to have Arthur getting smashed at the Bachelor Party, haha, I think he has a little bit of the personality that might cut loose at a party. Especially when Bart spikes the punch, haha.

This references the upcoming New Years chapter, haha, where we see what happened to AC the first time around. In case you missed it, the Kill Me or Kiss Me moment was when Lucy looked ready to kill Clark but kissed him on the cheek instead. I wasn't sure how to do it, in fact, I nearly posted it without that before I realized I didn't have that moment in there, haha. Hope you guys liked it, write a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Father's Day_.


	34. Father's Day

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! He's something, isn't he? haha.

_**meg**_ - Bart will find someone eventually, haha, but I thought Little Jimmy needed some fun, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - All I can say about Lucy is that I didn't see any hesitance during 'Ambush' and I'm not sure she would have contained herself from jumping poor Clark's bones if she had the chance, haha. We'll see exactly what Lois does to them later on, hahaha.

_**katlynne**_ - I won't lie, I never saw Supergirl the movie, haha. I watched season one of Lois and Clark a very long time ago, I'm surprised I didn't remember that, but yeah, I think they make a cute little pair, haha. And yeah, I have to admit, AC's been tainted by 'Blue Mountain State', haha, I couldn't help myself because I knew SOMEBODY was going to get a little bit crazy at the bachelor party and after watching that show, it had to be him, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Honestly, I hadn't even thought about it, haha. In my head, Little Jimmy was at least 18 in that last chapter, but your logic is true, haha. We'll just have to say he just looks young because of youthful good looks, hahaha. That one is my bad, haha.

_**sunset**_ - Lets just say that Lois would have killed Clark, Oliver, and Bruce if there had been strippers, hahaha. She wouldn't even need kryptonite, she'd have that adrenaline thing where chicks pick up cars, haha. He _becomes _scared of Mera after what happens on New Years, haha, and lets face it, all men should be at least a little afraid of their better half, hahaha. And yes, Clark is a good boy. Them good ole Kansas values, haha.

I was going for a surprise, haha. And yes, I checked out Kryptonsite and it appears there will be a bachelorette party at the very least, so it looks like things will be happening sooner than I thought. Way back when this all started, I read an interview where they were saying that Lois and Clark might have a long engagement and thus there wouldn't be a wedding in Season 10. Now it seems that there will be from Erica Durance's recent interview, so we're just going to have to pretend we didn't notice these, haha. It was really only post-Season 10 so I could include Bruce, though I guess we should have bumped it up a bit because like cathy03 said, Jimmy is a little young still, hahahaha.

_**tooblind**_ - I know exactly what you mean about Clois, I don't know which one I like more, the Kill Me version or the Kiss Me version, haha. I strongly considered it, and we might very well see a flashback to Aqua. I agree, they were pretty jerkish, but I felt like they were redeemed in the end. I don't recall Aquaman always being much of a team player, so I wasn't terribly surprised. I had to let Little Jimmy have some fun, haha, I love him!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents, the Lanes

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #34, Father's Day

**Author's Note:**

**

* * *

****PAST**

"You have to put your fingers here...and there," instructed Jonathan.

For Father's Day, Clark and Martha had decided that Clark needed to learn how to throw a football. Jonathan knew that he probably shouldn't instill the love for the game in his son but what father could turn down throwing a football with his son on the back forty?

Jonathan ran back to give Clark room to throw the football to him. "Like this?"

He nodded, and his son reached back to throw. Jonathan had all of a split second to dive out of the way as the football rocketed past him at speeds that he had never seen. He looked up to Clark, who looked shocked and scared, "Dad? Dad! Are you ok?"

Jonathan laid down on his back and started to laugh. "Dad? What's wrong? Are you ok?"

"You've got quite the arm, son."

Clark looked at him in fear, but then realized that his father was ok and joking. He started to laugh and sat down next to him.

"That wasn't very normal, was it?"

Jonathan smiled carefully at him, "It's special, Clark."

Clark lit up. "Do you think we can try it again?"

All it took was a nod for his son to jet off into the distance to find the football. Jonathan laughed. When Clark returned, they practiced a few more throws to get the strength just right, Jonathan standing out of the way this time. Once Clark had gotten the hang of it, they decided to try again.

Jonathan ran a ways away to give Clark room to throw, and to his surprise, Clark threw him a perfect spiral pass.

"That's great, son! You're getting the hang of it!" he shouted across to him.

He could see Clark's radiant smile from there. They kept at it until it go dark, each would take turns running pass routes and Clark would impress him with how far he could throw the ball. When they finally got home, Martha was waiting for them with dinner.

"Did you two have fun?"

Clark began to babble on and on about his father told him he'd be the next John Elway. Jonathan just sat down at the counter and smiled. No matter where they found him or where he came from, in moments like this, Clark Kent was just Clark Kent. He was just Jonathan's son, excited about his first real brush with football. That was enough of a present to last Jonathan a hundred Father's Days, not that he'd complain if he got to do the same next year.

**PRESENT**

Lois looked between her husband and her father. Despite their positive steps during Thanksgiving, they weren't exactly about to jump for joy at the idea of spending together. But it was Father's Day, and he was Clark's father-in-law, so they decided to spend the holiday together.

"So, how are things at the Planet?"

Clark looked to Lois, who gave him a '_talk_' look. "Uh, well, things are, things are good. Lois is the top reporter now, and I'm upstairs too."

The General eyed Clark. "So you've finally gotten out of the basement, eh?"

"Well, Daddy, Clark just isn't one of attention. He doesn't really go for headlines like I do. He works just as hard as I do."

"I don't know about that, Lois, you're one hell of a reporter."

"I have to agree with Clark, that Perry White seems to rave about you."

Lois looked at Clark, '_Traitor,_' she thought.

"The Chief thinks very highly of Clark too."

The General just barely avoided rolling his eyes at the comment. Lois gave Clark a sharp look.

"So, uh, how are things in Washington?" Clark asked.

"Things are going well. We're working hard to make the vigila, I mean, super-powered bill a fair one."

Clark smiled at that, "That's good to hear."

"The people really believe in this Superman character, personally, I preferred the Blur."

Lois snorted, causing the men to look at her. "Nothing. I was just...nothing."

"Well, I admit, the cape seems like a bit much..." Lois glared at Clark, she liked the cape. "...but he's making a difference, that's always good."

The General seemed to agree.

"I'm going to get us some more drinks," Lois said. She walked over to Clark and planted a kiss on his cheek before whispering in his ear, "Don't think I'm going to forget to kill you later for that."

Clark gulped.

**FUTURE**

"The Gramps wants more lemonade."

Lois looked over her shoulder at her daughter standing there with a glass in her hand. "Why do you have to call him that?"

"He likes it."

Lois rolled her eyes, filling up the glass and watching Jo'an go back into the living room. '_That little monster just can't keep herself from handing out little nicknames, can she?_' she thought to herself, hand on her hip.

"I know what you're thinking, and she gets it from you," quipped her husband from behind his paper. Lois threw a washcloth at him.

"Here ya go," sang Jo'an, hopping back onto the couch with her grandfather.

"Thank you, Jo-Bear," the General replied. He glanced to the kitchen to make sure Lois didn't hear him, she was a bit jealous that she never earned any nicknames from her father. '_Maybe that's why she walks around throwing out nicknames like 'Smallville' and 'Farmboy'_'

They sat comfortably in front of the TV, watching a cartoon that Jo'an liked. The General thought it was a bit ridiculous, but Jo'an was very eager to watch it none the less. It appeared to be an old style cartoon involving a rabbit hunter who talked funny. Jo'an thought it was hysterical.

"What's so funny about this guy?"

Jo'an looked at him like he was crazy. "It's Elmer Fudd, Gramps."

"And?"

"And he's me and Mommy's favorite."

The General furrowed his eyebrows, Lois never watched cartoons when she was younger. "Mommy's?"

Jo'an rolled her eyes. The General attempted to look annoyed at the action, but deep down, he thought it was adorable.

'_When did I become such a softy?_' he thought to himself.

Jo'an hopped up on her knees and waved her hands like she was going to give her grandfather a lecture. "Daddy likes Elmer Fudd, and Mommy thought it was cute, so she liked Elmer Fudd, you getting this stuff?" she asked. The General couldn't contain the smile. "So, Mommy and Daddy like Elmer Fudd, so I like Elmer Fudd. Getting it?" She looked around before continuing, "Plus I like how he talks," she giggled.

The General smiled at his granddaughter and planted a kiss on her forehead, "I got it, sweetheart."

Lois looked in from the kitchen with her husband, "The kid just turned my father, the General, into a pile of mush."

"I guess some people are just mushy."

She eyed Clark, making him nervous before giving him a kiss. Leaning back she commented, "Smallville, You're like the Man of Mush."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope everyone enjoyed that one. I got some help from mygyps17 for the Jo'an & General Scene, the whole 'the Gramps' and 'Jo-Bear' thing was mygyps17's idea. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to run the dialogue by her, but I hope it's still Jo'an worthy for you guys. The Jonathan Kent section was a bit thinner than I originally intended, but I hope you guys still liked it all the same.

The Kill Me or Kiss Me moment was when Lois kissed Clark but told him she would kill him later, haha. It's hardly as scary as those moments usually are, but this was supposed to be a day of peace, haha. I went with the lighter moment.

Anyways, I hope you all liked it, let me know what you thought via review!

**Next Up: **_Not quite sure yet, it'll have to be a surprise!_


	35. Evil Lex

Review Comments:

_**A,sky**_ - I think she might be the only one, haha.

_**Blank**_ - Haha, I felt the same way when mygyps17 told me about it.

_**Meg**_ - There will be more Jo'an and the General, I promise, haha. And we will see Jo'an reaction to being a big sister.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I threw that in there just for you, haha.

_**Jas-El**_ - We've had a Brainiac chapter and a Jor-El chapter, but there's always a chance we could see them again. I have a scene with Kara and Jo'an coming up and I think it's going to be pretty funny, haha. They're going to be quite the pair, haha. Hint: It might have to do with my 'Kitchen' scene, haha.

_**PhanOfDP333**_ - Since it's Father's Day of this year, I would think that Lois has interview Superman and he has gone public. As for the Blur thing, I'm not sure that Clark will tell people he was the Blur. I just thought it would be funny if the General didn't know they were the same person, or Clark, haha.

I'll think about the Legion, I do like Booster Gold, very excited he will be in an upcoming episode of Smallville.

_**sunset**_ - Thanks as always! I can't take credit for the nicknames, haha, that's all mygyps17. I'm glad that you liked the interaction between the General and Jo'an, it was a long time coming, haha. I think we'll see more of it over Mother's Day and Thanksgiving and Christmas, haha, probably more. I didn't think you meant anything bad, it was a mistake on my part, haha, just saying. I personally hoped that the wedding would come after the show, but I too cannot complain if we get to see that tear-jerker scene, haha. That would be amazing, not going to lie, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - It was your guys' idea to continue the Jo'an scene, it seemed like a natural fit for ole Bart, haha. The Bathroom is on the list of places I was thinking about covering, the Torch and Smallville High are probably on the list too. I love to write Jonathan Kent because he is one of my favorite characters but I almost have to go all new original scenes because there just weren't many Clois scenes that involved Papa-K.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, shades of Clana and Lexana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Lex Luthor (Evil)

**Author's Note: **This one takes place just before Lex returns (which you can see in my 'The End of a Dark Journey' story).

**

* * *

**He didn't understand.

He watched from across the street as Lois Lane and Clark Kent laughed. If you looked closely, you could see the tan line around her finger where an engagement ring usually was. He figures that Lois likes to keep their private-life private when they are at the Daily Planet.

Clark didn't look much different. The glasses were an interesting touch. He slouched more, his clothes looked baggier than they ought to be. But it was still Clark Kent, he couldn't mistake that face for anything in the world. Not the face of the man that killed him.

"Don't give me those puppy dog eyes, Smallville. We're going and that's final," she told Clark.

He must have missed what they were talking about. He was busy trying to figure out how things had gotten to here. The last thing he remembered, Clark was in love with Lana. His Lana. He had made sure that Clark and Lana would never be near each other again. Clark wore his heart on his sleeve and everything about him was powered by that heart. Break his heart, break Clark Kent. That was supposed to be the breaking point.

Somehow, he was stronger than ever.

"You know I hate going to Perry's parties, he always tells the story about when he nearly got us killed at Saunders Gorge."

He could see Clark's pout. Clark Kent never pouted, not any time he had ever seen. "But it's so cute when you blush!" she giggled.

He had never heard Lois Lane giggle. Ever.

They were completely different, and yet, they were completely the same. They still bickered. They still had that fire in their eyes. But they were closer. And they were completely comfortable that way. They looked more alive than ever before.

"What if we make a deal?"

"What kind of deal?"

"I will go, but you have to..." Clark wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Lois's jaw dropped in shock, but there was a certain rise in her cheeks and a tint of red in her face that said she wasn't exactly upset.

"Clark Kent, you are something, you know that?"

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"Will you wear it?"

"Which one?"

"You know which one, Lois."

Lois eyed him. "The stars and stripes?"

"No."

"The french maid?"

He gave her a look as if to say, '_come on_.'

"If you say Amazon, I'm going to kick your ass."

"Lois, you know which one I want."

Lois bit her lip, "That scottish get-up?" He shook his head. "Not the storm trooper...the bunny outfit?"

Clark sighed, "Lois..."

Suddenly, her eyes got wide. "Oh no, mister. That was embarrassing enough the first time around. Not gunna happen."

Clark smiled sadly, "I guess you'll have to go with Jimmy as your date."

"Can't I just wear the Susie-Home-Maker outfit? You love that one. I can live with that one."

"I wonder if Jeff is available..."

Lois huffed. "Fine. But I hate you, Clark Kent, you know that, right?"

"I love you too, Lois Lane."

Lex watched on in shock. This was the complete opposite of what he wanted. He had destroyed Clark and Lana, but standing there with Lois, Clark looked more confident and more powerful than ever. He had seen the stories, he knew what 'Superman' was capable of. He was stronger now more than ever and the only thing that Lex could figure was that it had something to do with the woman on his arm.

Lois Lane had turned Clark into a more powerful being than he had ever imagined, not that Lex was afraid. He knew all of Clark's secrets, and he knew he could defeat him. It would just take time. Before this story was over, he would overcome Superman.

The couple continued down the street until Lois was frantically trying to pull Clark away from the pet-shop they had wandered in front of.

'Seriously, isn't Shelby bad enough? Another dog is going to be the death of me!' she thought to herself.

"Come on, Smallville, we got a party to get ready for."

Clark looked at her oddly, "I'm sorry, who are you? I don't believe we've met..."

Lois looked like she wanted to kill him, and Lex thought she might.

Instead, she rolled her eyes and gave him a quick kiss before growling, "I'm Stiletto."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope you guys liked that one, it was a lot of fun to write, haha. We will get a 'Good Lex' chapter soon, this one had been in the works for a while now but I couldn't figure out how to make it long enough. Originally there wasn't any of that Clois stuff, just Lex watching them from afar and wondering how Clark had managed to not only survive losing Lana Lang, but become even stronger along side Lois Lane.

The Perry Reference is back to Perry White's first appearance in Perry, and will be a lead in to a 'Perry' Chapter. Anyways, let me know what you thought.

**Next Up:** _Probably New Years, but don't freak out if it's not_.


	36. Doomsday

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - There is a good chance I'll do one, don't tell anyone, it's a big secret, but I might end up doing more than 50 chapters, haha.

_**meg**_ - Still working the idea of Jeff, but I can confirm that there will be a Cat Grant chapter.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - He's lurking because he isn't "back" yet. He's trying to keep that low profile, but he's too obsessed with Clark now not to try and find out what is going on in his life. How could Clark not be turned with outfits like those? hahaha. And I think it'll be the latter, not sure that even lois would wear some of those outfits to a public party, let alone at her Boss's party, haha. I forgot about the dominatrix outfit, I'll have to fit it in somewhere, haha.

That wasn't the last we'll see of Evil Lex, that's for sure!

_**A,sky**_ - I was worried that I made it too obvious which costume it was, haha, I'm glad it was a surprise! And yes, more Evil Lex! haha.

_**sunset**_ - I hadn't even thought about the Talon blowing up, haha. Let's say that Lois had to put some stuff in storage because that apartment was so small and she was sharing with Chloe, haha. That works. haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Couldn't imagine the General as the kind of guy who watched cartoons, haha. I used to work with a bunch of older guys and none of them ever watched cartoons or TV shows, it was weird. Plus it set up that whole thing with Jo'an explaining why she loved Elmer Fudd, which was just too cute to let logic get in the way, haha. I think we'll definitely see more scenes of Jo'an and the Gramps, haha, from both me and mygyps17.

I think that Clark is letting loose a little bit, haha. Which is what happens when you are young and in love, haha. As Clark Kent becomes a more buttoned up and straight-laced reporter for the Daily Planet, I reckon he's going to be a little more fun at home with Lois Lane. haha. And I promise, we will see a pretty Evil Lex scene up ahead where he is torturing Clark and what not, he'll be pretty Evil, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #36, Doomsday

**Author's Note: **There is a bit of a spoiler for upcoming Season 10 episodes in the bottom Author's Note, just a warning. Enjoy!

* * *

"I can't be in there, Chief."

Perry sighed, he had an office nobody was using and the star reporter he assigned it to, didn't want it.

"Lois, look-"

"No. I'm not going to look at anything. Give it to somebody else. Olsen doesn't mind me using his computer and I have my trusty laptop, there isn't a damn thing I need from that office to do my job. Give it to Cat, give it to Jeff, I don't really give a damn. I'm not using that office. It was...I can't use it."

"I really am sorry about-"

"Don't. You're my Boss, not my shrink. We're not talking about it."

"If you need to take some time off, I would understand."

For a moment, Lois considered taking him up on the offer. But she didn't want to be at home either. She couldn't be there longer than giving Shelby some food and taking him on a walk. It was too painful to be in that house without...

"I don't need time off. I need you to get off my ass about that office. I can't be in there alone. I can't."

Perry nodded. He knew that Lois wasn't going to budge on the issue. Lois got up and left the office, heading over to Jimmy's desk. It was his day off, and he was more than happy to let Lois work there. He knew that she was barely keeping it together.

Lois peered over the top of his cubicle at the office in question. Those morons still hadn't put her name on top. She almost broke down when she thought to herself that they wouldn't be changing the names around, they'd be removing a name all together.

'_No, you can't cry. You cannot break down in the middle of the Daily Planet. You are a Lane. Keep it together_.' she thought to herself.

Instead, she focused on the research in front of her.

She knew she shouldn't have taken the assignment, she was there when they...when they...she knew that she was stupid to still cling to the hope that he might come back. That thing that was masquerading as him, that was not Superman. That was something else entirely. He might have the rest of the city fooled, but Clark would never hurt someone if he didn't have to. And he didn't smile at her like that. And he didn't have those eyes.

It's touch was so cold. It was like it was a machine. And the way that it called her 'Ms. Lane' instead of Lois. It gave her chills just thinking about it. That was not Superman. That was not Clark Kent. Bruce and Oliver swore to find out the truth, so far they had come up with nothing.

And that kid, that boy. She coined the name 'the Metropolis Kid' for him, but he seemed to prefer Superboy. He looked so much like Clark, but he wasn't. She followed his story all the way back to Cadmus Labs, she knew what that meant: Lex Luthor.

Maybe Lex was trying to clone Clark. Whatever he tried to do, the boy escaped and he did not seem keen on being friends with Lex.

Then there was John Henry. He was a nice man. He was just trying to pick up the slack, he thought of Superman as an idol. As a hero. The thought warmed her that Clark had meant so much to the world and so much more to John. He inspired a whole world of heroes.

She knew that the other Superman couldn't be Clark. He knew better than to wear glasses while he was wearing the suit. The way that it talked to her, she knew that it wasn't him. It didn't seem to be human and it sure wasn't trying to be.

Lois let out a sudden laugh.

'_What am I doing? I don't even care about this. I don't even care about Superman right now,_" she thought to herself.

And she didn't. She cared about Clark Kent. Her husband. The man that she had chosen to spend the rest of her life with, but would now have to spend the rest of her life without. She couldn't stand the idea of stepping into that office, no more than she could stand to sleep in that bed alone.

All the Claritin in the world wasn't helping her while she was trying to cuddle with Shelby. Not that she could sleep much anyways. Every time she closed her eyes she could see him. Broken and beaten. That monster laying a few feet away. His last words had been of worry over that thing, that monster.

She quickly wiped a tear away from her eye and tried to focus.

Behind her, she could hear people whisper and gasp. She was momentarily ashamed that she had let even that one tear slip out. She knew that she would be the talk of the office, as if she wasn't already, and now the girls would try to corner her and cheer her up. She turned to say something, anything to keep them from bothering her. She couldn't stand another one of their pep-talks. Instead, she found herself gasping instead.

His expression was a mix of a smile and a frown. A smile, she suspected, she hoped, because he was happy to see her face. A frown because he was afraid of how she would react. Not a scratch, not a bruise, the only imperfection was the hair his glasses pinned down on the side of his head.

"Is it...are you really..."

He took a step closer. "It's really me, Lois. I'm so sorry that I ever left."

She looked into his eyes. She needed to see that it was really him. She had enough of her fantasies over the last few weeks. She pulled his glasses just far enough down to see the blues erupt in his eyes. It was him. He was back. She promptly slugged him.

When he came back up to see her, his hand rubbing his cheek but a small smile on his face just for her because it didn't really hurt. He was Clark Kent after all and she needed to see that. Seeing that was enough for her, she threw herself at him, kissing him with every ounce of passion she had. When they finally came back up for air, well, when she finally came back up for air, she looked all over his face before finding his eyes.

"Don't ever leave me again."

His smile smile widened into a grin. "I won't."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think of my 'Death of Superman' idea? haha. The idea here is that Doomsday returned from under ground, as

(**START SEASON 10 SPOILER!**)

he supposedly will again in Season 10 according to Kryptonsite, and killed Superman. Now, my version obviously takes place when they are already married and already stars at the Daily Planet and Clark is already Superman (obviously). This was written before I found out about that little spoiler, and I liked it too much not to post it anyways, so you guys will just have to suffer through this slice of potential AU, haha.

(**END OF SEASON 10 SPOILER!**)

The Kill Me or Kiss Me moment wasn't as obvious as it usually is, the whole "slugging Clark and then kissing him" thing was that moment. Now, I know a lot of you have asked about my "bigger story" mentioned in the very first chapter. That story is basically a story I wrote as my version of a Superman Movie where we take off from Season 5ish (that's all I had seen up to at that point) and rocket into present day Superman. In that story, Clark is killed by Doomsday and when he returns, Lois kisses him as we saw, but is then very upset with him for dying (she's very rational obviously, lol), and that is what they are fighting about during that first chapter. Things get even more hectic when Lana Lang returns, realizing she wanted Clark and him dying sparked the realization and she saw him coming back to life as their second chance to make things right and be together, blah blah blah.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked the Doomsday chapter, that oddly enough did not include Doomsday, haha.

**Next Up:** Now I know it will be '_New Years_'.


	37. New Years

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - I'm not sure we'll ever see Darkseid show up as an actual physical villain, I can't remember from who or where, but I thought I read something about him being a villain in the background kind of character, I hope it's not the case though. And I guess the question is in what capacity does Doomsday return in.

You will be missed! I'm sure I'll still be at it when you get back, so we'll catch up then! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - More and more everyday, I'm more certain it will be more than 50. Too many characters to do before then, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I probably should have made it clear during the chapter itself, but Clark was one of the people who "went missing" during the battle. All that destruction and what not, there had to be a whole mess of people who went missing or were killed. Clark is thought to be one of them. But no, Perry doesn't know. Probably has his suspicions given his interactions with Clark during his first visit to Smallville, but he doesn't "know", haha.

That scene was inspired by a combination of two storylines. 1, Lois knowing the difference between Clark Kent and Clark Luthor at the end of Luthor. 2, one of the reasons that Clark wears glasses in the comics is to hide the real color of his eyes because they are _so _blue. No shade of that blue on Earth.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Arthur/Mera

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #37, New Years

**Author's Note: **Sorry guys, got kind of caught up in football today, haha, hope you guys like this one! This one takes place on New Years, obviously, but it has to take place this last New Years because of Mera and AC's presence and the fact we referred to it during the Bachelor Party, which surely will take place before the upcoming New Years.

**

* * *

**

Mera walked into the Ace of Clubs with a smile on her face. She was very excited for their New Years party at the Ace of Clubs, it was the first time that all of her new friends would be together in the same place without a life-or-death situation at hand.

She spotted Lois and Chloe chatting with Dinah near the bar, but her walk was cut off by a...was that a naked guy? She watched the man sprint past her yelling, she couldn't help but laugh as he disappeared back into the crowed. She continued walked over to Lois and Chloe, but they were both giving her funny looks.

"Did you guys see that drunk idiot? He was naked!"

Niether could look her in the eye. "What's wrong?

Chloe coughed and turned her head away, Lois glared at her before swallowing. "Uh, yeah, we...uh, we saw him alright."

Mera smiled and turned to point at him, "Yeah, he's such a..."

Much to Mera's surprise, she knew who the naked man was. Much to her surprise, it was..."Orin?"

Her husband was doing what looked like some kind of version of the chicken dance, she could see Clark and Oliver struggling between laughing and being concerned. Bart was nearly rolling on the floor in laughter. She stomped over and tapped on his shoulder, he turned and grinned, "Mera! This is so much fun!"

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What?"

"Why are you naked?"

AC looked at her like she was crazy. "What are you...holy cow, I'm naked!"

"Yes! You are! Why?"

"Uh...," he looked back at Bart with a glare.

"That's my cue to bail, guys," quipped Bart before super-speeding out of the room.

Mera glared at him. "Just because you are a fish, doesn't mean you have to drink like a fish!"

"I am not a fish! I'm a man! Why does it always come to fish jokes!"

Mera huffed and exited the room in anger, a silence broke out amongst the crowd as Lois and Chloe followed her and J'onn handed AC a towel.

Oliver exchanged looks with Clark. Clark frowned at him and shook his head at him. Oliver nodded his head at AC. Clark rolled his eyes and walked over to stand besides AC, who had wrapped himself with the towel. He stood there for a few moments, trying to find the words to say right then.

"Uh, do you wanna talk-"

"No."

"Ok then."

Clark retreated back over to Oliver. J'onn glared at Clark and decided to be the voice of reason, "Look, Arthur-

"Don't call me Arthur!"

J'onn flinched. "You just need to go and-"

"Grovel," finished Oliver.

AC glared at Oliver. "What? She's hot."

Before AC could go over and kill Oliver, Clark stopped him. "What Ollie means is that you love Mera, and you should go talk to her."

"Actually, what I mean was-" Clark hit Oliver in the stomach, and after his coughing fit, he croaked, "what Clark said."

In the other room, Lois was trying to cheer up her aqua-inclined friend. Unfortunately for her, Mera had latched onto the one thing that she was ill-equipped to defend against. Especially when you considered that she was part of the problem. "We're just not like you and Clark."

Lois let out a sigh. "The thing with me and Clark, it's not always lovey-dovey," she explained.

Chloe snorted. Lois Glared.

"Sometimes, I want to kill him something fierce. The farmboy can push my buttons. He even wants to kill me sometimes."

Mera lifted her head, "Really?"

"Yeah, but we always kiss and make up. Because I love him. And he loves me. Like you love AC, and he loves you."

Mera snorted.

"He does. I can see it in his face. That boy is banana-sandwhich over you, he's a fish out of water without you."

"Fish jokes," she laughed. "All we get are fish jokes."

Lois smiled softly at her, "You just have to train him."

Chloe rolled her eyes, "Oh god."

"Train him?"

"Yeah. Men are stupid. You have to whip them into shape."

"You trained Clark?"

Lois looked at her with inexplicably, "I've been training that boy for six years!"

Back in the main bar area, Oliver was trying to come up ideas on how to make Mera forgive AC. Clark had come up with something to do with a heartfelt speech, Oliver just laughed at him, "Oh boy, silly Clark." He was offering up jewelry store names when...

"Arthur Curry!"

Every man froze in place, but all but AC breathed a sigh of relief. He looked completely terrified, but to his credit, Mera was a bad ass. He turned around ever so slowly and faced her. She had her hand on her hip and a fire in her eyes, Clark felt chills at the stance's familiarity.

"Grab your clothes."

"But-"

"_Now_."

As AC went to grab his clothes, Mera looked over her shoulder at Lois and Chloe. Lois was nodding her head with a big thumbs up. Chloe had her head in his hand and was shaking her head. Clearly, they had a difference in opinion when it came to dealing with men.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

Mera cast Lois one quick look before turning back to AC, "Training."

As the two made their exit, the music came back on and most of the crowd went back to doing what they were doing. Lois walked over to Clark and Chloe made her way back over to Oliver. Lois and Clark watched AC retreat with his wife. Clark wrapped an arm around her, "Remember when we were that young and inexperienced?"

"Are you calling me old?"

Gulp.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you think of New Years? haha. I kind of struggled to come up with something, I knew that AC would end up naked, not unlike Will Ferrell in Old School, he's just a crazy drunk, haha. The thing I struggled with was Mera's character, we've seen her in like three scenes, not sure how to write her, haha, I hope you guys liked it though. She talked about having to give AC a few water blasts to the head so I figured she has a short fuse, haha.

Well, I hope everyone liked it.

**Next Up:** Going to have to be a surprise, haven't picked one yet.


	38. Shayera

**Review Comments:**

_**meg**_ - I like to think that Lois wants to kill Clark for getting hurt all the time, haha.

_**sunset**_ - We did say that he was naked during New Years in the 'Arthur' chapter, haha. I had to do it! Believe me, Bart is going to pay, haha. He has it coming and there are two Kents that are going to give it to him, let's put it that way. And here is your fun hint for the day: Neither is Clark or Lois, haha.

Mera might have the down-low on the being a couple at work thing, but Lois Lane and Clark Kent are the experts at being a couple at home. At least that's the way I'm going to tell it, haha. The thing about Lois and Clark is that their love has always been there and will always be there. And I'm talking about in the comics, the movies, and the show. When you think Clark Kent, you think Lois Lane. They are the couple that all other couples are compared to.

_**clarkfan325**_ - I hadn't read that about Doomsday, I guess that just makes my little slice of Doomsday work better, haha. And thank you, I wanted to mix it up and do something different and it sounds like everyone liked it, so that's really encouraging! I like having the whole League around too, just wish I had could have included Bruce and Diana, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

_**A,sky**_ - I was going for a '_might be the best when it comes to a relationship on the front lines, but might be a little bit of a rookie on the home front_' kind of thing, haha. I think that would give Lois an interesting role amongst the female superheroes because while they might be experts at being superheroes, Lois does have the edge in the romance department, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Carter/Shayera

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #38, Shayera Hall

**Author's Note: **This one is set in the future when Carter and Shayera have returned to the land of the living.

**

* * *

**

"Lois Lane?"

"Kent. Lois Lane-Kent. And you are?"

The woman looked over Lois' face with a smile. Jo'an felt nervous at her mother's side.

"I hear that my husband kissed you once upon a time, I felt like I should apologize."

Lois looked at the woman with a confused look. She had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. "Excuse me?"

"I think Lois would remember me better as the man who sent her back home to her own husband."

A man walked around to stand next to the woman, Lois gasped at the sigh before her.

"Carter?"

Clark and Oliver walked up to Lois, not noticing Carter or the woman standing next to him.

"So, the petting-zoo people are willing to forgive you for shouting at the goats, but I have to take her next time."

"Uh...Clark...look who's here."

Clark looked up at the woman, he didn't recognize her. When he looked at the man, he smiled widely, "Carter! You're back!"

The two shook hands and shared a quick hug.

"I see that you took care of the Darkness."

"Yeah, but there was a while there where I didn't think I could make a difference anymore."

Carter put a hand on his shoulder, "Heroes always make a difference, Kal-El."

Jo'an pulled on Oliver's sleeve.

"Who is he?"

Oliver smiled at her and got down on one knee, "That...is your Uncle Tweety."

Carter growled under his breath at Oliver, Jo'an lit up. She loved having so many _special _uncles.

"You know Oliver, the ancient Egyptians had a word for people like you: ...Schmuck."

"I missed you too, Big Bird."

Clark laughed at the duo and turned to the woman, "You must be Shayera, we've all heard a lot about you."

She laughed and shook his hand, "All good things I hope."

"Those are the only things I have to tell," said Carter, giving her a peck on the cheek.

Lois let out an 'aww' while Oliver looked borderline shocked, "Did the Talking Pigeon just get all mushy sweet on us?"

"Did you forget that I carry a Mace around with me?"

"If you're carrying one with you today, it's hiding place might explain why you always act like you have a stick up your-"

"Ollie!"

Oliver turned to look at Lois, she nodded her head at Jo'an. He gave her an apologetic look before looking to Shayera to do the same, but she was laughing.

"You must be the Master-Archer that Carter has spoke of," she said, extending a hand to Oliver.

He shoot her hand but shot a look at Carter, "Master, eh? I knew you were impressed."

Carter rolled his eyes. "I was hoping that we could buy you all dinner, and catch up? Minus Green Jeans of course."

"Carter," warned Shayera.

"Fine, Peter Pan can tag along too."

"You do still owe me some dinner," chimed in Oliver.

"You still owe me some dry cleaning."

The women ushered the two apart from their little duel of words. As the group made to leave, but Jo'an didn't move. She was looking at her mother, and then to this Carter fella, then back to her mother. "What's wrong, Joey?" asked Oliver.

"I don't understand."

"What don't you understand, sweetie?" Clark asked.

"How come Uncle Tweety kissed Mommy?"

"WHAT?" exclaimed Oliver and Clark.

Lois looked at Clark with what she hoped looked like an innocent smile, "I guess it's my turn to get killed instead of kissed?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** You guys asked for it, I hope you guys liked it! haha. And as with some of the other chapters, we will see the dinner, but that one will have to get the mygyps17 stamp of approval as there will be lots of Jo'an dialogue. I can get away with the couple of lines in one like this, but when she talks a lot, I've gotta toss it up to mygyps17 to make sure it's just right. And don't worry, I haven't forgotten about Hal either.

So, what did you guys think of Carter coming back? To be honest, I have no idea how his whole reincarnation thing works. I don't know if he's born the day he dies and therefore should be considerably younger than Clark and Lois, or maybe it takes a lot longer. Either way, I figured that at this point, it's probably fair to say that he'd be back. Besides, you guys wanted him, I had to bring him back! haha. Though this was the 'Shayera' chapter, his might take place in 'Shield.'

**Next Up:** I'm really not sure, but there's a good chance it will be one of '_Hal Jordan_', '_Lana Lang_', '_Lionel Luthor_', or '_Thanksgiving_'. They are all close to ready.


	39. Hal

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - You shall see Jealous Clark in the upcoming 'Carter' chapter, haha. Metallo or Bruce with Lois, huh? That would be a serious detour from how I usually write or think about Lois Lane, haha. I'll have to think about it, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! There will be plenty of Oliver/Carter during his 'Carter' chater, haha. Probably more Jo'an as well. She'll want to get to know Uncle Tweety, haha.

_**meg**_ - Haha, that's awesome!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I couldn't let their little pet-names go! haha. And yes and yes for the dinner scene questions, haha.

_**sunset**_ - I didn't mind the Carter/Lois kiss either, it's not like Lois saw it coming and it's not like Carter meant to kiss Lois, he was trying to kiss Shayera in his vision of her. I don't think I could live with Lois being Shayera, I love her too much when she's with Clark! haha.

I agree, I think they are reborn too. Originally there was a line about Carter looking much younger than he did before, as if to imply he was a teenager or a young man or something. I left it out just to avoid any differences of opinion though. Carter said that he'd been around for 3000 years, so there is a good chance that he might not come back for quite some time, but even if he was reborn the day he died, he'd only be what? three or four years older than Jo'an?

Not exactly a good way to bring him back in Lois' lifetime (Clark will obviously still be around), so maybe he is reborn into his same body and he just crawls out of his tomb or something? I don't know, we're just going to have to run with this one, haha.

_**tooblind**_ - I love when she dresses up, and I'm not afraid to admit it! haha. I think I went for a confused Lex for both that reason and because Clark is stronger and more confident and more of a hero than ever before. Lex had to be thinking that losing Lana would cripple Clark.

Haha, I'm glad you liked Chloe. I think she might be rather shy about that sort of thing, haha. I'm not sure what they have to do, like I said above, if that was the case then the probably wouldn't be able to re-visit Lois or Oliver or any of the other human characters, and that's no fun, haha. We're just going to have to do the whole 'thats just the way that it is' kind of thing, haha. You will get your jealous Clark soon enough! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Tess/Hal

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #39, Hal Jordan

**Author's Note: **Not exactly a continuation of 'Tess', but takes place during 'Tess'. Enjoy!

* * *

"Sooo, whats with the ring?"

Hal looked up with raised eyebrows, Tess had what appeared to be the ghost of a smirk, while Clark was frowning in exhaustion. '_Here we go again_.'

He glanced around for a moment before answering. "Uh, well, it's part of my...well, my thing."

"Your thing?"

Clark coughed, "It's really warm in here, don't you think?"

It took every bit of her manners _not _to blow a raspberry at the dinner table in a fancy restaurant. "Like you could tell if it was."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You chill out in an ice-fortress in the middle of the Arctic, Smallville. You're not the best person to judge a climate."

Clark rolled his eyes, Tess smiled. If they kept going at it with each other, she and Hal would survive the evening unscathed.

"So...tell me about your thing."

Or not.

"Well, the ring chose me, and it's what gives me my powers."

Lois looked at him with a funny look. "It chose you?"

"Yes, for my ability to overcome great fear."

"Oh...Uh...that's uh...neat."

Clark chuckled, "I told you my cape wasn't the goofiest costume accessory in the League."

"Watch it, Kent."

Clark shot him a smirk, Lois warmed with pride at the expression he stole from her years ago.

"Don't harsh my gear just because you got schooled on the field last week."

"Hey, that wasn't a fair game. Bart used his powers."

"You ought to have known that he would, Bart never plays by the rules."

Clark crossed his arms and huffed. Lois and Tess couldn't help but chuckle at the boys for their competitive streak.

"Still."

"What? It's not like you hesitate to pick Oliver when we play darts," retorted Hal.

"Anyways, what about you two? How are things in the after-glow of the wedding?" asked Tess, trying to deflect the attention back to Lois and Clark.

"Oh you know, nothing much has changed. Lois still takes two hour long showers-

"And Smallville still broods around in the Loft when I beat him at Scrabble-"

"Because I don't point out all your spelling mistakes-"

"Well I don't complain about how much plaid you still have in your closet."

There was a long pause.

"As much."

Hal frowned in confusion, '_They sure bicker a lot_.'

Tess looked mostly amused at the sight before her.

"Yeah, well, it's not you hear me complaining about your coo-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence Clark Kent if you _ever _plan on having..." Lois glanced at Hal and Tess, "..._dessert _ever again."

Gulp.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, how did you guys like that one? This one is obviously the dinner date that Tess and Hal had with Lois and Clark. I hope you guys like the banter between Lois and Clark as well as the banter between Hal and Clark, haha. Sorry it was on the short side!

Also, sorry that it came in a bit late. My folks came into town to visit, so I've been pretty busy, but luckily I have a leg up on a few chapters, so I don't expect anything to keep me from posting. The chapters just might be a little more on the late side than the early side, but I'll do my best! Shoot me a review, let me know what you thought of the kinda, sorta continuation from 'Tess'! Did you guys like it?

**Next Up:** _Thanksgiving_.


	40. Thanksgiving

**Review Comments:**

_**sunset**_ - Well, there is the upcoming 'Carter' chapter, and this one had some dinner in it, haha. I was hoping that the 'warning' would pass as the title reference, but if it didn't, I was hoping I got the pass since it's the continuation of a chapter that _had_ a title reference in it. I'm glad you liked it, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Ryan Reynolds is as good of a image as anybody, haha. I hadn't thought about connecting the new guys to their movie actors, mainly because I don't like Christian Bale's performance as Bruce Wayne very much, haha, but I love the movies. I kind of liked Ollie and Tess myself, but between the comics and the show, I put him with a combination of Chloe and Dinah. I think that was pretty fair for the fans if I may say so myself, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Lanes, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #40, Thanksgiving

**Author's Note: **This one was on the short side, but how about I promise another chapter showing the actual dinner? Here is a hint: it might not just be Lois, Clark, Martha, and the General at the dinner table! hahaha, hope you guys like it.

**

* * *

**Lois walked into the dining room, the turkey in hand. Martha and the General looked up with excitement, Jo'an and Clark were slightly more apprehensive.

"Shut your faces, you two. I slaved over this turkey all day today, you're gunna stuff your faces."

Clark smirked impishly, "But Lois, you said to shut my face, however will I be able to stuff it at the same time?"

Martha gave Clark a look that clearly said 'dont start', the General simply chuckled. Jo'an was watching for Mommy to hurl the knife at Daddy.

With a clang, the platter hit the table. "Shut your face in between face stuffing, how about that? Now somebody cut this bird."

Both Clark and the General stood up at the same time.

"I'll take care of it, sir, it's my house."

"No Clark, I'll do it, I'm the old man here."

"Yeah, so why don't you relax?"

"I've got the experience with turkey carving, son."

"But I'm-"

Lois coughed and gave Clark a sharp look.

"...going to let you take care of it this year, sir."

He backed down and returned to his seat. "Thank you, Clark," he chimed in victory.

Clark looked up and smiled, but it was hardly warm. The General looked far too smug for Clark to be warm right now, Jo'an was mildly disappointed that no one threw any food. Dinners at Uncle Ollie's house were so much more fun, they got to have food fights! Cept when Mommy was there.

Or when Aunt Chloe was there.

Or Daddy.

Ok, so dinners with only her and Uncle Ollie were that fun. After dinner, the youngest member of the family's sweet tooth chimed in.

"Hey Gramps," Jo'an said innocently, rocking back and forth on her feet.

The General smiled at his grand-daughter, "What is it, Jo-Bear?"

She moved her mouth side-to-side, as if contemplating, but he knew that look. His daughter used to give him that look. It was her 'I am really cute so look the other way while I do something mischievous' look. Not that he was going to resist her.

"I want ice cream."

He smiled at her, "Let me find a bowl for you."

"Actually...I like eating it out of a cup."

In the living room, Clark was letting his food digest and Lois was resting her head on his thigh. He wasn't sure there was anywhere else in the world he wanted to be right then, but he could almost feel the wheels turning in her head. She was fixing on bringing up din-

"You know, I thought I was going to have to kill you earlier."

See. Clark's eyebrows shot up, but his smile was knowing. "What ever could you mean?"

"Oh, I don't know, possibly when you decided to argue with my father over who gets to carve the turkey and almost revealed our secret."

"And yet, I let him carve, and our secret is intact."

Lois smiled at her husband. "I think I'm going to have some ice cream."

"All the bowls...wait, never mind, I know what you're going to do," he said with a knowing smile.

She gave him a quick peck, "I love you, Smallville."

He went back to reading his paper, coming across an interesting story by Cat Grant. He read for a while before becoming distracted by the sounds of cabinets opening and shutting far too many times to be normal. He looked up over his paper, "Is something wrong?"

"I can't find my Elmer Fudd cup."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Did anyone notice something about that ending? haha. It leads into 'the Kitchen'. I hope everyone liked it, but I have to run, that's why it was so short, I just wanted to get something up for today. Like I said above, I'll write a chapter showing the actual dinner, that will possibly be the General's chapter.

Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** It'll have to be a surprise.


	41. Earth2 Lois

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - They spend so much time with the world on their shoulders, I enjoy seeing them as people too. I mentioned that I didn't like Christian Bale all that much as the Batman, and that's because his portrayal seems to be all Batman and no Bruce Wayne sometimes (most of the time, haha). That's what has made me fall in love with Smallville like I have, it's so much Clark Kent (for obvious reasons), and that's huge to me.

_**alexindigo**_ - mygyps17 has given me the inside scoop on what is coming up, and believe me when I say, it's going to be brilliant. Hang in there! haha.

I know it'll sound like a cop-out, but my Batman will always be Kevin Conroy, the voice of the Animated Batman. That TV Show had humor, action, drama, romance, and a great amount of Bruce Wayne. He was never one or the other, he was always both. I think any portrayal of Batman has to be both because without who he is as Bruce Wayne (and I don't mean just as a cover), he could never be who he is when he wears the Cowl. As far as actors go, Keaton is my favorite, but the Nolan films are by far my favorite Batman films. They just need to remember that Bruce Wayne is just as important to the character as Batman is.

And thank you so much! I never thought it'd become this, but I'm proud of what it's become and I'm glad you guys have been here for the ride with me!

_**LoisClarkNLove**_ - Oh geeze, I'm blushing! haha. I thought about ending it with her yelling, but she hasn't quite figured out who has it yet! haha.

_**meg**_ - Haha, the General is quite the character, isn't he? haha.

_**sunset**_ - A spoiler just for you, Lucy is there, I'm just saving her for the dinner scene itself, haha. The secret is Clark's identity, what I meant was that Jo'an took Lois' cup to eat ice-cream out of (as Lois was planning on doing, daughter like mother, haha), hence leading to Lois' frantic search for the cup in 'the Kitchen', haha.

It would certainly be harmonious, but something about the Lane-Kents makes me think things would just be wrong if they were harmonious, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! Hopefully three banter-y chapters makes up for a single POV in this one! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I tried to almost play it off like they each wanted to carry the _burden_ of carving the turkey, while both of them wanted the privilege of carving the turkey, haha. And of course, the Cup, haha. I have a friend that likes to eat her ice cream out of both old style Pizza Hut cups, the big red plastic ones? That kind of inspired the idea there. Just a fun little tie in for us to have, especially since I'm still going to show Lois vs. Jo'an later on, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Lollie (Earth-2), faintest shade of the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #41, Lois Lane (Earth-2)

**Author's Note:** You asked for it, you got it! haha. Clark Luthor will also get a chapter.

**

* * *

**"What...in the hell...just happened here?"

Lois looked out over the skyline of Metropolis from the roof of Luthorcorp Media, trying to catch her breath. Trying to catch her sanity.

"If that wasn't Luthor, who the hell was that?"

His eyes were the same in so many ways, but they were different in just as many. That was not the same man that had treated her so badly. That was not the same man that had been taunting and torturing her Oliver since they were in boarding school so many years ago.

He was...kind. She couldn't help but feel...something...for this Clark.

"Oh god, I really am losing my mind, aren't I?"

Pacing back and forth, she couldn't possibly quantify all the thoughts racing through her head. _Kent_. He said his name was Kent. She couldn't help but wonder if he was somehow related to the Kents from Smallville, that was where he was from after all. She faintly remembered their names being Jonathan and Martha.

She had felt completely awful when Oliver had to take their farm away, they seemed like such nice people when she had visited her cousin. They were pretty popular in the farming community down there, she had run into them from time to time.

And what was with that love stuff?

'_I promise Lois, I will never let this happen to us. I can't live in a world where you don't love me._'

Who the hell says something like that and then just jets off to places unknown?

Let's play pretend for a minute. Let's say that he was from some alternate universe. Ok. She'd seen enough in her day to know anything is possible. And let's say that Clark Luth-, Clark Kent was a good guy in _that _universe. She stopped to wonder if he'd still be Ultraman. '_I mean, he still has the powers of Ultraman, but wouldn't he have a different name? Like Uberman? Or Excellentman? Superman? No, that sounded like something out of a comic book_.'

Ok, back to the point.

Let's say that he's a good guy. From what he said, she was pretty close to _that_ Clark. Was this like a...brother-sister love thing? Or was it...

Gulp.

'_You can see right through me, straight to my soul...to my heart_.'

Did she...and Luth-, I mean Kent...no, that's not...he does have a nice...wait, what? No. No, no, no. That's not possible. She loved Oliver! How could she be with Clark Whatever? Surely she would be in love with Oliver on the other side? Wait, if Clark is a good guy in the other world, does that makes Ollie...the Villain?

No. Oliver could never be a villain. Could he? Does that mean that the Luthors are good people in the other world? She felt like she was going to throw up, her mind was simply spinning too fast. All that she thought she knew, had changed completely. Forever.

How was she going to look Clark Luthor in the eye and no long to see that Clark Kent guy looking back at her?

How was she going to lay next to Oliver Queen, not knowing if he has within him to be a monster?

How was she going to look at her world the same ever again?

How was she going to going to go to bed that night and not dream of a world where she knew _that _Clark better? How was she not going to wonder what it would be like to see that same look, hear that same voice, and imagine that same touch again?

Something deep within her stirred when he combined those three traits. She felt like she had known him all her life, without knowing him at all. It was like her heart was screaming to kiss the man, but her brain and her fear were telling her she ought to kill him before he could kill her.

But there was something about those eyes.

They were filled with so much emotion that it felt like it all spilt out and she had to take some into herself. She had been working for Clark Luthor for quite some time now, but he had never looked at her like that. Spoke to her like that. Touched her like that. She knew that this was someone different altogether, and somehow, she couldn't help but feel like she needed to know him better.

"And it has nothing to do with the way his butt looked in those pants," she told herself.

She thought about it for a few moments longer, but she couldn't find herself feeling any better about the situation. Something about the way he spoke to her told her that she was probably never going to see him again, at least not as Clark Kent, and that made her feel kind of empty inside.

Lois was sure of only one thing: "I need a drink."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, what did you guys think of my Earth-2 Lois Lane interpretation? I was thinking about how she might take it the whole experience, and to be almost forced to see a world where everything was different, that had to be some kind of confusing, haha.

It's a little bit on the angsty side, but we have some humor in there and what not. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it.

**Next Up:** Looking like it's going to be '_Carter Hall_' on deck.


	42. Carter

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad the angsty-ness didn't bring it down for you! haha. I tried to sneak some humor in there!

_**alexindigo**_ - It's the whole 'gotta be dark' thing. I keep hearing that Superman should be 'dark' like the Dark Knight was, same with the new Spidey movie, but it is just a trend and since it worked for the Dark Knight, then it should work for everyone, right? Disagreed. Superman is a beckon of light, in constant contract to the guy over in Gotham. Sometimes people get so caught up in that, they forget that as dark as _Batman_ is, Bruce Wayne is not. He has dark things in his life, but he is still a man who chooses to go out every night and save people, he is still a beckon of light, it just shines when he is Bruce instead of when he is Batman.

Everyone has their own opinions of Tom Welling, haha, I admit that he is not the best actor on the show. But I do think he has grown into the role and is a lot better than he used to be, particularly in his scenes with Erica Durance, which is when I want him to be the most animated anyways, haha.

I will see what mygyps17 has to say and let you know, haha.

_**Jas-El**_ - Hadn't thought about Star Girl or Doctor Fate chapters, but I am working on the Conner Kent one. Hang in there.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, everyone likes a bad boy, don't they? It was breaking my heart a little bit to see Lois look at Clark with so much hatred, haha, so I can feel your pain. I'm glad that you liked it, I was worried about it being too angsty!

_**sunset**_ - It was a bit heart breaking that he said it, but in a way, I'm glad that he did. Part of me needed her to know that she could see the real Clark despite all the things she knew and felt. It made their bond that much stronger in my eyes because it's strong enough to transcend alternate universes.

The Clark Luthor chapter might be the hardest chapter I've had to write so far, I have to constantly remind myself that _this _Clark _would _be a douche, haha. That chapter might not be as flattering towards Clark Luthor as some might hope since I know that a lot of people liked bad boy Clark, but I honestly have to say that trying to make him a semi-good person is like walking over broken glass for me, haha.

There will have to be another chapter for Carter as 'Hawkman' because I want to do a flashback chapter to 'Shield', haha, wish granted!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**katlynne**_ - I remembered that you had two accounts, no worries, haha. Even though he was a douche, I think she would have checked him out, haha. I can't believe they canceled it either, I didn't know until my phone popped up with an email telling me you reviewed the chapter, haha, talk about mixed emotions. Happy to see the review, disappointed that they canceled it tonight, haha, guess I'll just have to catch up on Bones tonight instead.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chollie, Carter/Shayera, Bart/Kara?

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Carter Hall

**Author's Note: **Here is the long awaited 'Carter' chapter, hope you guys like it!

* * *

"...and two of the large pizzas, everything on it of course, and ummm...how about the taco dinner, extra cheese and meat, and the...", Bart looked over to Jo'an, who nodded dramatically, "french fries."

Jo'an smiled a devilish smile. The waitress looked at Bart in shock, but took down his order. "I'll be back with drinks in a few minutes."

After she retreated back to the kitchen, the gang stared at Bart.

"What?"

"Did you think maybe the other people in the restaurant might want to eat something too?" Lois explained as if he was a child.

Bart's jaw dropped, "The french fries are for her!"

Lois was about to say something, but Kara put her hand on her leg, "It won't change anything, he eats like ten men."

Bart smiled lovingly at Kara, but she just rolled her eyes.

"I see not much has changed," began Carter, but his eyes rested on Jo'an, "Except for the little one of course."

"She is very pretty, Lois. You must be very proud," added Shayera.

Lois looked rather smug about it, "Meh, what can I say? Pretty Boy over here has some good looking genes, that's for sure."

Clark chuckled, "But she gets her personality from her mother."

All eyes turned on Clark. "By which...of course...I mean, her sweet...sweet...sweetie pie attitude. Right? Oliver?"

Now all eyes turned onto Oliver, who gulped. Even Chloe was looking at him like he better not screw up.

"Uh, well...you know Joey, she's just, uh...the sweetest."

Lois gave the duo a sharp look, "We'll remember that one for later, right Junior?"

Double Gulp.

"Mommy's gunna kill you twooooo," Jo'an quipped, sucking down her virgin Shirley Temple.

This brought a laugh out of the group, the kid was just too cute for her own good.

"I see Mr. Green-Jeans still like to turn yellow under pressure," called Carter from the end of the table.

Most of the group rolled their eyes. '_Here we go again_,' they thought collectively. Shayera gave her husband a swat on his arm, Oliver on the other hand clenched up his jaw, "I only have one life to give, Tweets, I have to choose my battles wisely."

Carter smirked, "So I can expect you to stay out of my way then?"

Oliver laughed dramatically, "Ah, well, I can't say that will be the case. Someone has to look out for you, it'd be a shame to see the Bird get put in a cage."

"Boys," warned Chloe.

"He started it!" defended Oliver.

She silenced him with a look, he leaned back in his chair, not happy about having to be quiet. Chloe sipped her drink in victory.

"You would make quite the mother, Chloe, surely you have considered having children of your own?" asked Shayera. Chloe spit out her drink.

"Wa...wa...what?"

Shayera looked confused, Oliver and Chloe looked mighty uncomfortable. "Haven't you two thought of having children?"

Oliver started to laugh uncontrollably, "We uh...we uh..., we're trying to take it a little bit...uh...slow."

Carter eyed them, "But you two have been together for quite a long time now."

Oliver and Chloe looked everywhere but at each other. Or Carter.

"They kinda broke up for a while...," explained Lois. Chloe shot her a glare, Lois shrugged her shoulders in apology.

Bart nudged Kara, "Do you think they're gunna tell-"

"Shh!"

Everyone looked at Kara, who had been slightly...ok, a whole lot louder than she had intended. Chloe now shot Kara a glare, who mouthed '_Sorry_' in defense.

"Wait, what's going on here?" asked Oliver.

Everyone looked at Chloe with a keen interest. She looked, well, uncomfortable didn't even begin to scratch the surface.

"Well, I uh...I have some...I have some news. For you. Oliver."

Oliver furrowed his brow, his confusion could not be more clear at the moment. "Yes...?"

Chloe looked around at everyone at the table. Clark looked concerned, but his wife looked particularly giddy. So did Kara and Bart. Clearly Lois was better at keeping secrets than Lois was, who would have thought we'd see that day? Carter and Shayera exchanged looks, they were coming to realize the situation.

Jo'an just looked confused as all hell.

"I'm uh...pregnant."

Oliver fainted, his face his the table with a thud. There was a few moments before anyone spoke,

"Ouch," quipped Jo'an.

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that? haha. So maybe the title is a little one sided in this one, haha, but in my defense, it's a continuation of the Shayera scene, so you're gunna have to cut me a little slack here! haha. I didn't see a spot to slip in the kiss part.

Well, I guess Chloe has something to talk to Oliver about now, haha. Let me know what you thought! Hit the review button!

**Next Up:** I think '_Good Lex_' is next, but theres a good chance it's the continuation of '_the Kitchen_' instead, maybe something else all together? haha.


	43. Good Lex

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked it, I tried to throw in some of the favorites in there since I had everyone together. Zack Snyder is one of my favorite directors in Hollywood right now, so I have high hopes for the new Superman movie. Hopefully it will star Tom Welling, though I know not everyone feels that way, haha.

RedK Clark while married to Lois? haha. I can't help but imagine where that would go, and I won't lie, it'd probably run into 'M-rating' territory, haha. 'The Kitchen' and another chapter featuring Jo'an and Kara are both on the way, as is the dinner scene with Jo'an at Thanksgiving, just have to get mygyps17 approval on dialogue and what not, I like to make sure that I'm staying true to the character, and mygyps17 is wonderful in that way.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, works for me!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm sure that there will be another chapter seeing the aftermath of 'Carter', and you better believe that Mr. Hall is dying to get in a few jabs at Oliver, haha. I'm glad that the chapter got you through a Smallville-less night, I was equally disappointed by the news.

_**AmberWaves**_ - Thank you so much! haha, but really, all the credit for Jo'an goes to mygyps17, quite the master right there, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, shades of Lexana, mentions of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Lex Luthor (Good)

**Author's Note: **This one is set during a point in time during Season 4 when Clark doesn't know what he's getting into by having Lois cook, haha.

**

* * *

**

"I don't want to do it."

He gave her a slight nudge, "You have to do it."

"You aren't the boss of me, Smallville."

"Lois."

She huffed dramatically and walked over to his table. He was sitting there, sipping on his stupid coffee. '_Ugh, I can't believe I'm doing this. How does Smallville get me to do these things?_' she thought frantically. She waited for him to notice her there, but he didn't make a move.

She _knew_ that he _knew_ because of his stupid smirk, he just wanted her to make the first move. "Ahem."

Lex looked up, but he had the nerve to play dumb with her. "Oh, Lois, I didn't see you there."

A few feet away, Clark was worried he was going to hear teeth break with Lois clenching her jaw so hard.

"Lex," she more or less growled.

"What can I do for you?"

Letting out a ragged sigh, Lois explained, "The Kents are going into Metropolis for one of Mr. Kents appointments and..."

"And?"

She let out another ragged sigh, "and Clark and I were hoping you would come over for dinner. To thank you for helping with Met-U."

Even Clark had to admit that it was a bit cruel the way that Lex was taking his time responding. On the other hand, Clark did enjoy seeing Lois this flustered.

"I think that would be lovely. Does six sound about right?"

Lois gave him something between a smile and a snarl, nodding her head. She immediately turned and walked past Clark, making sure to bump him as hard as she could with her shoulder along the way. "I'm going to smack that stupid smirk right off your face, Smallville. Lets go."

Lex couldn't help but chuckle as he watched them retreat from the Talon.

As Jonathan picked up his bag and made his way towards the back door, but he had to paused and turned around.

"Now Clark, are you sure about this?"

Clark furrowed his brow.

"I mean, Lois is...well, she's Lois. And Lex is a Luthor. Bringing those two together under one roof when they're both so very close to your secret, that could spell all kinds of trouble. I just want to make sure you're going to be careful tonight, ok?"

Clark smiled, "Don't worry, Dad. I'm not going to do anything to give anything away. I promise."

Jonathan patted Clark on the back and made his exit. Clark let out a sigh and looked around the kitchen. Hopefully it would survive Lois Lane.

Lex and Clark set the table in awkward silence. The smell wafting out of the kitchen was not...great. It kind of smelt like someone set the spice rack on fire. Clark looked at Lex with an apologetic smile, Lex on the other hand seemed rather amused by the whole situation. A few fire detectors later, Lois emerged from the kitchen with...well...no one was quite sure what it used to be. But right now, it looked a lot like a piece of coal.

"Alright, chow down."

Neither of them moved.

"What?"

They exchanged nervous glances.

"Well? What are you waiting for?"

"Uh, Lois, what wa-, i mean, what is...it?"

Lois glared at Clark with an intensity that told him she might very well kill him. Super powers be damned, he gulped in fear.

"It's pot roast, Smallville. What the hell did you think it was?"

Lex snorted as Clark whispered something about wishing he had a dog under his breath. "Oh, you two are too good for Lois Lane's cooking? Is that it?"

Clark stiffened as he saw Lois' hand reach her hip and her knee lock in place. She was giving him her '_I am waiting, dammit_' look.

"How about I take you two out on the town?" offered Lex. "I could have us a table at the finest restaurant in Metropolis by the time we get there."

Lois shot Lex a glare, "I did not slave over this meal-" Clark coughed "-to go out and eat instead."

"Lois, it's fine, cooking just isn't one of your strong suits, I guess," teased Clark.

She started to laugh, but not in a happy way. More in a, '_Lois Lane: Wanted for the murder of local farmboy and billionaire businessman_' kind of way.

"Smallville, eat it. Now. Or else."

Clark's eyes narrowed. "Or else what?"

Lois' eyes narrowed slightly more than his were. "Or else I'm going to shove it down your throat."

He laughed, "I'd like to see you try, Lane."

"I'm not joking, Kent."

He put his arms over his head and started to smirk at her. Lex watched on in pure amusement. He'd get a thousand Lanes into Met-U if it meant he got to watch these two go at it. It was like watching fireworks go off. The way they dueled, it was more like foreplay than an actual fight.

Clark looked over to Lex with a smirk, and that was just the chance Lois needed.

She grabbed a piece of coa-, I mean pot roast, jumped over the table, and tackled Clark to the floor. He knew better than to use his super-speed in front of Lex or even Lois, so he almost _had _to let it happen. Lois straddled him on the dining room floor, trying to shove the piece of pot roast down his throat. "Eat it, Smallville!"

"Never, Mad Dog!"

Lex watched the duo wrestle on the floor. He couldn't contain the smile forming on his face. Whether they realized it or not, there were some serious sparks going on between the General's Daughter and the Farmer's Son. Watching them a blaze, he couldn't help but hope for their future.

'_Because the more that Clark falls in love with Lois Lane, the more he falls out of love with Lana Lang_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, what did you think? I know that last line seemed kind of selfish on Lex's part, but I think most of us are just as happy with that notion, haha. I know that I am happy about him falling out of love with Lana and falling in love with Lois!

Well, I hope everyone liked it.

**Next Up:** As soon as I get the final approval from mygyps17, the sequel to 'the Kitchen' will be up. Until then, gunna have to be a surprise.


	44. Lucy

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - On some level, I always expected Lex and Lana to find each other. They're both broken people.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks!

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - You are very welcome, I was very upset to hear it as well.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think we might have to write a scene where Lois has been meeting Martha for cooking lessons! haha. I too thought that was quite the meal for Lois Lane, haha, I was very surprised that it wasn't more comedic, haha.

_**sunset**_ - I'm glad you liked 'Carter', haha. I also noticed a few looks that had me wondering as well at the end of Icarus. Very good point.

I thought you guys might like seeing Mr. K showing up. I think whether they realize it or not, even by Season 4, the whole '_sometimes I think you don't know me at all, and other times, I think you know me better than anyone_' line is very true. Get your Lucy fix right here! haha.

_**katlynne**_ - Thanks! I'm glad you told me, haha, it would have killed me if I turned it on and it wasn't Smallville! haha. I haven't been on those boards before, but I will make sure to check them out! I can imagine that they were very upset! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #44, Lucy Lane

**Author's Note: **This one is the long promised chapter that takes place during 'Bride' and shortly after. Enjoy!

* * *

"Do it! Freakin' do it! Do it, do it, do it!" she whispered under her breath.

They were so close, just a little bit more, '_Wait, who just gasped_?' she thought to herself. She looked over to see Chloe sprinting towards the barn entrance, and that's when she noticed who was standing just beyond the party lights: Lana Lang.

'_You son a..._' she internally growled.

She looked over to see Lois and Clark now standing apart. Clark was shocked to see his old flame, Lois was retreating to the back of the party. Their near-kiss was all but an afterthought to Clark, but if Lucy Lane was going to have her way, he'd remember _damn_ fast.

Lucy considered who to kill first: Clark or Lois.

On the one hand, Clark was dumb enough to be star struck by that bimbo again. On the other, Lois was a Lane damn it. She was going to march back in there and kiss that man she loved so much. Or kill him. Maybe both. Preferably kiss first, kill second.

Making her decision she tore off after Lois, hoping to push her back into the barn. By the time she reached the house, she saw Lois sitting with that Oliver Queen character. She had heard about him in phone calls and tabloid articles in the past. Personally, she thought Clark Kent was one hell of a man. She had spent more than one night wondering how far that farmer's tan might go. If she was the kind of girl who blushed, she would have.

Anyway, from the bit of the conversation she heard, it sounded like Oliver was going to push her in the right direction because he was telling her that Clark needed her. If not, well, she would just kill Oliver. He was a pretty boy, but he wasn't that pretty.

Lucy headed back towards the barn, hoping to edge her way between Clark and the Homecoming Queen. Luckily she had managed to appear right about the time that Chloe and Jimmy were cutting the cake. Perfect opportunity to drag Clark away and smack some sense into him.

Unluckily, she felt a tremor so strong that it sent her to the ground. Next thing she knew, Clark was flying over heard and some creature was stomping around and throwing some kind of a fit. Lucy didn't know what else to do so she did what everyone else was doing: Run.

It was chaos after that.

Chloe was missing. Jimmy was lucky to be alive and Lois was flying to Star City to stay with him. Clark promised Lois that he would find Chloe, and part of Lucy was not surprised when he apparently found her alive and well. Clark Kent tended to make things right. It was her turn now.

"How ya doing, Smallville?"

Clark whipped around so fast that he was afraid he revealed his powers to whoever was calling his name. Luckily, she didn't seem to have noticed anything out of the ordinary. Unluckily, it wasn't who he was expecting to see.

"Hey Luce, and uh, could you not call me that? That's what-"

"Lois calls you. I know."

Clark smiled sadly. If Lucy didn't know any better, it looked like Clark was starting to miss his plucky partner. Uh, work partner.

"Where's Lana?"

He looked a little nervous at first, but cooled his features. "She's out."

Lucy clicked her tongue and nodded. She walked over and took a seat across the table from him, he eyed her carefully. He knew better than to give a Lane the upper-hand, especially one as...unpredictable as Lucy Lane.

"Sooo, how have things been?"

"They're been, you know, different. Everything feels pretty different without...you know."

It was her turn to eye him carefully. "Without?"

He let out a soft laugh, she wasn't going to make this easy. "Without Lois."

"Ah, so you have noticed that she's not around, huh?"

Clark rolled his eyes, "It's hard not to notice when she's so bossy. It feels like I have been insulted in weeks."

Lucy smiled. "If you miss being bossed around so much, I'd be glad to do it. I have a few ideas in mind."

"I think I'll pass, Luce."

"Shucks. I was hoping you might be vulnerable to all the Lanes."

Clark gave her a goofy look.

"Well, I figured you hadn't noticed. You do have Lana living here already."

He let out a sigh, "Please don't start on me."

"It's hard not to, I saw you two at the wedding, Clark. I know that you have feelings for my sister."

"I don't...It's not like that, Lucy. Me and Lois are just good friends. That's all."

"That near kiss certainly made me think otherwise."

Clark leaned back in his chair, clearly not enjoying their change of topics. Shelby took this opportunity to run over and rub his nose in Clark's side.

"All I'm saying is that Lois cares about you, Clark. A lot. And it's not the usual, run-of-the-mill, guy of the week type caring. Of all the people in her life here, you are the only one she feels the need to talk about when she calls. She doesn't even talk about Chloe like she talks about you."

She had to bite back a giggle when she saw him blush, "Really?" He coughed and took on a deeper tone. "I mean, really?"

"Don't break my sister's heart Clark, she's given more of it to you than either of you realize."

As Lucy walked out the door, she caught the screen before it shut and peered in. She couldn't help but feel her heart warm when she saw the goofy smile on Clark's face as he petted Shelby's furry head.

He might still be stuck on Lana Lang right now, but he was opening up more and more all the time to Lois Lane.

'_And if he doesn't, I'll jump his bones and then I'll kill him_,' she thought as she headed down the driveway.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Sorry this one took so long to get out, had a crazy day today. Well, what did you think? This one was a request, including the whole idea of what would happen. There was probably less butt kicking than originally thought, but I thought it was Lucy-esque, haha.

Shoot me a review, let me know what you thought! Also, Henry Cavill as Superman, eh? No Tom Welling this time around, let's hope for next time!

**Next Up:** Gunna have to be a surprise, I haven't decided quite yet!


	45. Batman

**Review Comments:**

_**Spoons There Are**_ - I was wondering what you were talking about, haha. Thanks though!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Only the General can resist Clark, but then again, he can't resist Jo'an and her Kent Charm, so who knows! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - You just have to blackout every post-gasp, haha, that's how I suffer through!

_**sunset**_ - No offended, but I'll give you my side of things, haha.

It was my intention that Lucy would be kind of manipulative about all this. I think Lois probably does talk about Clark a lot, as evidenced in 'Arrow' when she apparently talked to Oliver a lot about Clark, enough for him to be surprised about how Clark turned out to be. Of course at the time, it was that Oliver had envisioned Clark as a geek. But Lucy knows Clark, and by 'Bride', Lois was feeling certain feelings, so I think she might be nicer about Clark, but still the sheer volume of talking about Clark was probably a tip-off. However, like I said, I think Lucy would be manipulative and "play it up" if you know what I mean?

I understand exactly what you are saying, I thought the same thing at first myself, but I recalled that conversation in 'Arrow' and I couldn't help but add it in to see how that flared things up. It seemed to be a good way for the bells to ring for Clark, even though it took a while to do anything about it, haha.

Honestly, I don't think Lucy can look at Clark and _not _picture him with lust, haha. That's just Lucy in my head, haha. And yeah, I think other people might have tried over the years off-screen to call him Smallville because Lois calls him it so frequently, but I can't imagine he would let anyone but Lois, haha. His behavior then certainly set-up for that future, I agree. He can be two very different people, I think that complexity attracts her to him a bit too.

_**katlynne**_ - I threw that 50 chapter cap to the curb a while ago, there's no way I can finish what I want to do with just 50 chapters. I might ease up on my chapter-a-day policy, but there will be many more chapters to come, haha, have no fear!

clarkfan325 - I love their banter too, it's what made me fall in love with those two, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one sided Lois/Bruce, Bruce/Vicki

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #45, Batman

**Author's Note: **After much deliberation, I have decided how to approach the Batman chapter. I hope you like it, enjoy!

* * *

"So how do you know Lois?"

Vicki gave him a shove, "We worked at the Metropolis Inquisitor together before she got her Daily Planet gig."

"And before you moved to the Gotham Gazette, got it."

"How do you know Clark?"

Bruce swallowed awkwardly, but he played it off well. "Business."

"Business?"

"He interviewed me once."

Vicki gave him a funny look. "Bruce Wayne, who almost never lets a man interview him, let Clark Kent interview him?"

"Yep."

She let out a laugh. "Why do I find that hard to imagine?"

Bruce gave her a shrug, "Let me get us a couple drinks."

As he walked away, he couldn't help but remember that day fondly.

_Wayne Enterprises and Queen Industries had just joined forces on an a new eco-project. Bruce had known Oliver from many years ago, their parents had been acquaintances but they had a problem with some of the Queen's friends. Namely the Luthor Family. Oliver had set up an interview with the Daily Planet to begin their promotional phase, the paper had sent over two of it's star reporters: Lois Lane and Clark Kent._

_"I think I'll take the pretty one, no offense..." Bruce looked at Clark's press badge, "...Kent."_

_Lois' jaw dropped at how forward Bruce Wayne was being, Oliver bit his lips to keep himself from laughing. Clark gave Bruce a strained smile._

_"Actually, we're both Kents. Well, she's going to be. Lane-Kent. As in my fiancee."_

_Bruce furrowed his brow in disbelief. This...nerd, was engaged to this beautiful woman? "Ah...well..."_

_"Yeah, and since her and Oliver have a history of good chemistry for articles, our editor Perry White thought I should interview you."_

_Lois looked at him in surprise. That was not at all true, but she kind of liked seeing Clark jealous, so she let it play. "Yeah, Chief calls the shots."_

_Oliver knew that story was bogus, but he too found this too amusing to pass up._

_"So what do you say, Bruce? Shall we?"_

_The interview had been tense to say the least._

_"So do you flirt with everyone's fiancee?"_

_"Not everyone's wife is as attractive as your fiancee."_

_"I would take that as a compliment, if it was one."_

_"Take it how you want, Kent."_

_"Let's just stick to the questions, Wayne."_

_When it was over, which both were grateful of, the duo had made their way back from a small cafe down the street and were no making their way back to Queen Tower. It was getting late and the streets were dark when a gang of thugs surrounded them._

_Clark gave Bruce a look before turning back to the gang, 'This guy is an idiot playboy, but I can't let him find out my secret.'_

_Bruce gave Clark a look before turning back to the gang, 'This guy is a hick from Little-Town, but I can't let him find out my secret.'_

_The fight began and both did their best to try and make it look like they were a little less heroic than they actually were. It wasn't until a trio of thugs descended on Clark that Bruce showed off a little marital arts action to take out all three with ease, causing Clark to go, "Woah."_

_And it wasn't until one of them pulled out a gun and went to shoot Bruce that Clark revealed his abilities, speeding to knock out the shooter._

_When the thugs were all out of commission, the duo turned to look at each other in shock._

_"You're the...You're the Wildcat," said Clark._

_Bruce furrowed his brow, "No, but you're obviously the Flash."_

The memory was enough to make Bruce laugh. Clark had figured he was Wildcat because of his fighting skills, and he had thought super-speed was all that Clark had up his sleeve. Once they sorted out who was who, they went back to Queen Tower and Oliver revealed his identity. That was the day that the Justice League was taken to a whole other level, it would only get better when Diana Prince showed up a little later.

It was funny to think of how they used to be at odds because Bruce had hit on Lois. Clark had really held that one against him. Now, he thought of Clark as a brother. As his best friend. He was pretty sure that Clark felt the same way.

As he walked back over to Vicki, he noticed that she had found Lois and Clark.

"Ah, Bruce, we were justing talking about the real story of how you and Clark met."

Bruce and Clark exchanged looks before saying in unison, "Business."

"You two are unbelievable!" laughed Vicki. "Seriously, is Clark this cryptic with you, Lois?"

Lois looked at Clark with a long look. "Nah, I know Lois would try and kill me if I tried to keep something from her."

"Actually, he just enjoys all the kissing he gets when I'm the first to know a secret."

Clark blushed, causing Bruce to laugh. "All this time and you still blush when she talks about kissing you?"

"Hey now, give Smallville a break, he's just an old fashioned kind of guy."

"Thank you, Lois."

She smiled a wicked grin, "That's why he sneaks me into the copy room twenty times a day."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think of that one? haha. I got a few requests for Jealous Clark, and that seemed like the best way to do it without him turning into too much of a jerk. I'm not sure any of us want to see Jerk-Clark, haha.

When I came up with the ending for the flashback, I knew I'd use the Flash for Bruce's wrong guess about Clark. I've heard a lot of people say that Clark is more like the Flash than Superman because of his current powers as the Blur, so it seemed like an obvious choice. I was going to say Iron Fist for Clark's wrong guess about Bruce before I remembered that Iron Fist is a Marvel character. A great one btw if anyone likes comics 'round here.

Anyways, let me know what you thought, hopefully I'll finish up the chapters featuring Jo'an so I can get approval from mygyps17. There should be three of those chapters, so I'm obviously going to blow right on past 50 Chapters. I still have chapters in the works for a whole mess of characters! It really feels like it's going to be closer to 100 than it will be to 50, haha, what was I thinking? haha.

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, I think it might be Christmas Day, I like the idea there. I need to finish Lionel though, so we'll see. Hint Hint, Lionel's chapter might feature a Clark from another universe, haha. Anways, hope to see you next time!


	46. Perry

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, well, that's why I wrote the first chapter like I did. They needed closure. I'm not so sure that Lucy won't run into Lana at some point down the road...hint hint...haha. Henry Cavill is...well, he looks like Superman alright, but can he pull off Clark Kent? We shall see. There are two sides to that role, and while I'm semi-confident in his ability to play Superman (haven't seen much charisma), Clark Kent is the more difficult side to play.

_**katlynne**_ - Haha, a 100 might be on the big side, but I've got a whole list of chapters to come, so we'll see what happens! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I can. And I did. Watch for the 'Cat Grant' chapter, haha.

_**Gladius Grim**_ - Haha, I'm glad you enjoyed that last bit!

_**ElenaIsabella**_ - Thanks!

_**sunset**_ - I'm glad he was just right! haha. I was worried about writing jealous Clark. Well, the thing with that is there are two reasons: 1, I know we won't meet Bruce Wayne before the end of Season 10, and there is supposed to be a wedding in Season 10, so it was a timeline thing. 2, it would break my heart to see them break up for any amount of time, haha, though I could have had Bruce be an old flame from her pre-Clark days...hmmm...haha.

Haha, was she exaggerating? haha. Clark is the Man of Steel, hahaha. I'm glad you saw where I was coming from on the Lucy chapter. I totally respect and see your perspective, just wanted to show my perspective and why I went the way I went. I'm really happy you weren't upset that I countered you, haha.

As for 100 chapters, we'll see. Like I was telling katlynne, I have a very long list to go, so we might get there.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**A,sky**_ - There will be Jo'an-aplenty before much longer. Don't you worry! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm not quite sure how Clark will take Lucy's warning, obviously he did what he did with Lana and that was that, but I like to think at the very least, Lucy planted a seed in his brain about Lois and him. I'm not sure if I'll venture into 'M' territory, but I do have a Red-K Clark request, so I might have to because the only chapter I have imagined for that particular request might go there, haha.

Like I was telling LoisNClark4Ever, he does look the part and all, but I'm worried about his charisma and his Clark Kent side. I liked Brandon Routh just fine but he certainly lacked the charisma that Christopher Reeve had as Superman. Routh was very emotionless sometimes, and that's just not Superman. I hope that we don't see the came from Cavill. Playing Clark Kent is an even bigger challenge because he is supposed to be completely unrecognizable, tough job.

As for who will play Lois (and there better be a Lois, haha), I would have preferred Erica Durance obviously. She is the only Lois Lane that I can imagine right now. But she said she won't do it without Tom, so there's no dice to be had there. There's the obvious names that came with the Catwoman talks like Natalie Portman (though she is pregnant now), Emily Blunt, and Jessica Biel. Then there are fan favorites like Rachel McAdams, Zooey Deschanel, and Evangeline Lilly on the Superhero Hype boards. If I had to pick any non-Erica Durance woman in Hollywood right now, I'd pick Oliva Wilde.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Lucy/Jimmy hints of Martha/Perry

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #46, Perry White

**Author's Note:** Alright folks, here is the sequel to 'Evil Lex', enjoy!

* * *

"Oh come on, Clark! It's just a story! Everybody wants to hear it!"

The crowd urged him on, and Perry wasn't getting any less pushy about the subject. Suddenly, he felt someone grip his wrist.

"Stiletto wants to hear the story," she purred into his ear.

Gulp.

"So we're hanging off the edge of Saunder's Gorge back home in Smallville..."

The rest of the party was a bit easier. Clark managed to find a way to blend into the crowd and avoided Perry for the most part. Ever since he came to the Daily Planet, he had been very keen on being Clark's mentor of sorts. This of course came along with the occasional comment about his mother, the constant stories of Perry's first time to Smallville, and the constant lectures about writing for a great metropolitan newspaper.

Lois on the other hand seemed to have some sort of game of tag going on with the editor.

She would chase after him, always wanting to write some headline story that usually got her into more trouble than it was worth. And then he'd chase her around trying to get her to follow the rules, keep herself out of the paper itself, and get her to quit calling him chief.

Speaking of running away from Lois, Little Jimmy seemed a bit...scared of Lois for some reason. Not that it wasn't understandable to fear the star reporter or anything, she did have a short fuse of sorts. But Clark couldn't remember for the life of him why Lois might want to kill Jimmy.

"Hey buddy."

Jimmy jumped about two feet in the air, "Geeze, CK. You scared the daylights out of me."

Clark let out a small laugh, "Is everything ok?"

Jimmy gulped.

"I did something...bad. Really bad. Like, 'Lois is going to murder me and no one will ever find my body' bad."

A chuckle couldn't be contained as Clark shook his head. "What did you do?"

"Uh, well, it's kind of complicated."

"I'm a smart guy, Jimmy."

"Yeah, but, you might kill me too, CK."

Clark frowned. "Why would I kill you, Jimmy? Whatever you did couldn't have been _that _bad."

The look on Jimmy's face made him reconsider. "Could it?"

Jimmy muttered something that Clark couldn't catch.

"I'm sorry?"

Letting out a sigh, Jimmy spilt the beans. "I kinda, sorta, maybe, kinda slept with Lucy at your bachelor party."

Clark let out a loud laugh, causing most of the people around them to stare.

"You did what?"

Jimmy looked around to see if he could see Lois, but she was no where in sight. "Lucy? Lois' sister?"

"Yeah, I've met her."

"Well, we were, you know, dancing. And, you know, drinking. One thing lead to another, and yeah."

Clark tried his best not to laugh. "I'm sure Lois will understand one night of debauchery, it _was_ a party, Jimmy. And Lucy is a grown woman."

Jimmy gulped and turned bright red. Clark felt his heart drop for the boy. He was going to die.

"Unless it wasn't just one night?" offered Clark.

"About that-"

"Clark? Where are you? Clark!"

Jimmy's eyes nearly bugged out of his head at the sound of Lois' voice. He took off so fast that Clark was mildly certain that Jimmy might be related to his ole buddy Bart. Lois walked over, clearly intoxicated, and wrapped her arms around Clark's neck, swaying back and forth a bit.

"They have the most _delicious _punch over there!"

Clark eyed her oddly, "Lois, I don't think there is punch. It's an open bar."

"I know, I know, I know, Perry introduced me to a little thing called a Hawaiian Knockout! Get it? Get it?"

"I take it that's Hawaiian Punch with some kind of alcohol in it?"

Lois eyed him with one eye, there were too many Clarks when she used two eyes. Then again, who wouldn't mind a couple Clarks? She started to giggle uncontrollably. "I just had the bestest idea, Smallville. You should invite that Clark Luthor boy over!" She laughed again.

Clark's head shot up and he looked to see if anyone could hear her. Luckily, it didn't look like that was the case.

"Get it? Do ya, Smallville?"

He couldn't help but laugh a little bit. "Not really, but-"

"It's because I wanna kill one and kiss the other! Get it? Get it? I'm a riot, Mr. Kent," she laughed.

"You're something alright, Mrs. Kent."

Lois gave him a look, "Hey now, there should be a 'Lane' in there somewhere."

Clark gave her a small smile.

"Hey, don't look so sad on me, Smallville, I'm still going to rock your world tonight..." she got real close, "...as the vixen Stiletto."

She proceeded to give Clark a kiss that most wouldn't have the courage to give in public, followed by her jerking her face away and emptying the contents of her stomach onto Clark's shoes. She looked up and gave him a sad smile, Perry pushed his way through the crowd.

"Great Cesar's Ghost!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** So what did you guys think? haha. Originally, this was going to be the Clark vs. Lois jealousy chapter, but I liked the whole Jimmy idea a little too much to pass up on it. We'll get that one in a future chapter, no worries! What did you guys think of Lucy and Jimmy's one night stand being not so much of a one night thing? haha. I'm working on the chapter where Lois finds out as we speak. Should be fun!

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Connor Kent_.


	47. Connor

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - You will get a Red-K Clark chapter, I just have to sort out how to go about doing it, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, it was just too priceless to pass up!

**_katlynne_** - Clark vs. Lois is next up, haha, I hope you guys like it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, if the Wrath of Lois Lane is enough to make Clark Kent scared, imagine what it's like for poor Jimmy, haha.

**sunset** - Well, she wasn't wearing the get-up at the actual party, haha. It was more of a promise for _after_ the party. Sorry if I didn't make that clear in 'Evil Lex' the first time around, haha. It was a regular clothes party, not a costume party, haha. Traditional Perry White probably wouldn't pay much attention to someone like Clark Kent, but the Smallville Perry White seems to like Clark a lot and I imagine he'll try and mentor him, haha.

I know that's a bit of a timeline mess up on my part, haha, but I promise, even in that first chapter, I've always imagined Jimmy older, haha. Let's all just pretend he's at least 18, haha, and two years ago in 'Doomsday', he just looked _**REALLY**_ young for his age, haha. I'm not going to lie, even when I write about 'Little Jimmy' instead of 'Big Jimmy', I still think of Aaron Ashmore in my head, hence my mix ups, haha.

Maybe I'll find a way to make that happen with Bruce and Lois, maybe in an Earth-2 Chapter perhaps? haha.

_**bridj26**_ - We'll be cruising on past 50 chapters for sure. I have a long list of chapters I want to tackle between the characters, their alter-ego chapters, the location chapters, the holidays, and then of course all the requests I get and ideas that come up. We'll be at it for a while, haha. When you finally see the 'Superman' chapter, that's when you'll know that the story has come to an end, but that's a ways out. 'Superman' will be the final chapter.

_**alexindigo**_ - I agree, to me, Christopher Reeve IS Superman. At the same time, Tom Welling IS Clark Kent to me. Interesting dilemma isn't it? haha.

Anne Hathaway would have been a very interesting option, I could have seen her in the role. I don't like her for Catwoman, but I could have seen her as Lois if I needed to. I've never seen Gossip Girl, but Leighton Meester was good in "Date Night" in that small role.

Haha, I'm working on figuring out that chapter about Red-K Clark. And he would be married. You can find the Jimmy-Lucy background story in 'Arthur', and the 'fight' that Lois and Clark were having in 'Picking Lois' is because he died in 'Doomsday', haha. I've taken a lot of the elements of that story and used it in this story, but there is always a chance I could go back to it when I'm done here. We'll have to see how it works out.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #47, Connor Kent

**Author's Note:** So this one takes place before Doomsday when Superman has 'died'. Now, to make on thing clear that I didn't during 'Doomsday': there were a lot of casualties during the battle, and even more people went missing. As far as the non-superhero world is concerned, Clark is among the people missing and presumed dead. Perry White didn't know his secret identity during 'Doomsday'. That was an air-ball on my part. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**Chloe thought she was crazy.

Hell, maybe she was. Who takes a boy off the streets and invites him into their home? Who was she? Bruce Wayne? This was complete insanity. But he looked exactly like him. A perfect copy. Who could blame her for wanting to see that face around the farm?

"I can't tell you how much this means to me," he told her.

Lois nodded. "What was I going to do? Leave you to the Suicide Slums?"

He laughed. That was Clark's laugh. It scared her how much it sounded like him.

She watched him as he walked around the kitchen. She could swear that he was a splitting image of that boy she hit with her car, maybe a hair younger but still. Her mind still ached with everything that had happened recently. Between Clark's de..., she had to shake the thought from her head. She wasn't going to crack in front of this kid. Not some kid she found escaped from Cadmus Labs, aka the Luthor's genetic playground.

"So what are we going to call you?"

He looked up at her in surprise. She felt shivers. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm not going to call you Project 13, am I?"

He let out another laugh. She flinched again. "I don't know, I don't think you should call me Clark, do you?"

"I'm not going to call you...that."

He noticed that this was difficult for her, he couldn't imagine just how difficult. He didn't know how this was going to work. Forget the obvious stuff like the fact he was a clone of Clark Kent set in his teenage years. How was he going to look Lois in the face everyday, when his face would only remind her of the man long gone. He could tell that she was holding out hope that the real Clark would walk through that door any day now, he wasn't sure that she would ever be able to live with the fact that Clark Kent was dead. Killed by the Doomsday monster.

"I guess we can call me, Kent?"

Lois rolled her eyes. "And what? You're going to walk around the rest of your life going by a surname?"

"Well, do you have a better idea?"

She eyed him. He wasn't a perfect clone. She noticed a few differences. Looks like Lex's goons weren't as good as advertised.

"We've had a lot of luck with 'cousins from Minnesota' over the years. Pick a first name I guess."

He pondered it for a moment, "I don't know, what's a good name?"

Lois let out a sigh, '_He is just as infuriating as Smallville was at this age, I swear_.'

"How does Charlie sound?"

He made a face.

"I had a friend named Carter once, real hero."

He shook his head.

"Geeze Kid, just pick something already."

"What about Connor?"

She kind of quirked her lips back and forth, "Works for me. Connor Kent it is."

He laughed, she shivered again. "You really miss him, don't you?

Lois got wide-eyed. She did not want to talk to this kid about Clark. She didn't want to talk to anybody about it. It was none of his business, but somehow his eyes made her want to talk. Because those were Clark's eyes. Even if they didn't dance with the same Smallville fire.

"I do."

He gave her a sad smile. "Maybe someday...you can tell me about him?"

"I'll let him do that himself."

"Lois, I know it's hard to accept, but he's not coming back. I've seen his grave."

She gave him a look. "I know this is going to sound weird since you're his clone, but you don't know the first thing about Clark Kent. He _will_ be back."

Connor flinched, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. He'll come walking through that door, you watch. And then I'm going to kill him."

"Kill him?"

"Yeah. And then I'm going to bring him back to life, and we're going to get started on that family he promised me."

Connor smiled at that, '_I hope you're right Lois. I hope you're right_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, how was that for a 'Connor' chapter? It was one of the requests I got, it seemed like the best way to tackle it from my perspective. I hope it was up to par with our usual stuff. It was probably on the angsty side, but the subject matter called for it, didn't it? haha. In case you missed it, the Kill Me or Kiss Me moment was when she said she was going to kill Clark when he got home, and then '[start] on that family he promised'. So it's pre-Jo'an.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Cat Grant._


	48. Cat

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, but luckily, she didn't have to wait much longer until 'Doomsday'.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I'm not sure it'll work out like that, but I'll let you dream, haha. I too would love to see Smallville continue on. I was hoping it would in a way if Tom Welling was cast as Superman since I like to think they would've kept the Smallville cast for the movie, but as it turns out, Welling wasn't even on the shortlist for Zack Snyder. It's too bad really. Tom Welling did say if Season 10 got good enough ratings that a Season 11 could happen, I'm not going to hold my breath, but there's always something to hope for it seems.

I guess you'll have to find out for yourself down below! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Aww, I'm glad you like my Lois. I can't imagine her not being Clark's personal superhero, haha. Season 8 broke my heart too, I couldn't believe that little arc with Lana. It was like a 180 from where we were heading. I still don't get it. On the plus side, I think they'll make the most of Season 10.

I'm sure that Nolan will pull it off, I have supreme faith in him when it comes to making good movies. Not that I'm giving the new Superman movie a pass because he is just the 'Godfather' of the project, not the actual director, and Superman is not Batman. I'm just giving him a pass for 'the Dark Knight Rises' and other movies like it. I was personally pulling for Marion Cotillard to get the nod for Catwoman.

I think that he'll pull off the Superman suit, I'm not sure we'll see much of the actual Superman persona itself. The way that he talks makes it sound like we will see him fly off into the sky in the final moment of the show. He says a lot of "leave it where the fans believe Clark has become Superman" stuff.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, I'm sorry! On the plus side, I'm sure the 'Superboy' chapter will be a lot more chipper? haha. Connor Kent was a clone that Lex made in hopes of making a Superman that he could control, but Connor escaped before Lex could make it so. He went on to become Superboy and is considered a 'cousin' to the likes of Clark and Kara. He was a prominent character during the 'Reign of Supermen' storyline after 'the Death of Superman' story.

I think it's both Perry's involvement with Martha and the fact that Perry _knows_ Clark when he finally becomes editor, so maybe he latches onto the boy? I'm not really sure what my logic is, just a feeling I suppose. And yeah, Aaron Ashmore is who I see because he played Big Jimmy for so long. As much as I like Sam Huntington as an actor (and love him on 'Being Human'), he never pops into my head when I think Jimmy Olsen.

Maybe I can work something around that idea, haha. How about I promise a Bruce and Lois scene, but no promises of romantic on-goings? haha. As for the idea of Kristen Stewart as Lois Lane, I like her as an actress (one of the rare guys who enjoyed 'In The Land of Women', Adam Brody is very underrated despite his popularity from the OC), but I wouldn't cast her as Lois. She seems pretty young, especially along side Henry Cavill. Plus I'm not so sure about her ability to portray to be the quick on her feet elements of Lois. I suppose anything is possible though.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Haha, I had hope about it happening in Season 10, but recent news is that Kristin Kreuk doesn't want to come back. And on that note, I have to admit that I'm really disappointed in her. What does she have going on that is so much more important than coming back to the show that gave you your real start in Hollywood? I mean, I don't think they would have asked for more than an episode? Not very classy in my opinion.

I look forward to reading your reviews down the road, you've got some catching up to do, haha. And yes, I'm a good ole Browncoat, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Yeah, I hate writing sad Lois just because I hate to think of her as sad (how sad am I? haha), but it felt like it needed to be done since I got a request to do a Connor Kent chapter and it seemed like the best way to introduce him and find a way to sneak in our theme, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided Clark/Cat, one-sided Lois/Richard, Lucy/Jimmy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #48, Cat Grant

**Author's Note:** Well, the fans wanted to see Jealous Clark, here is some Jealous Clark for ya! haha.

* * *

The couple entered their office, closing the door with a bang. The mood was not a good one.

"I cannot believe Perry called us out like that!" she fumed.

Clark shook his head. "I know he is stressed out with Lex trying to buy the Planet, but that was brutal."

"Yeah, well, Bruce better not mess that one up. I am not going to work for Lex Luthor again."

Clark grumbled in agreement.

"What the hell is that?"

He looked up, Lois was pointing to his desk. He noted a large vase filled with colorful flowers. Standing, he walked over to see who they were from. The card wasn't signed, but it did have a hand written note: '_You take my breath away...today and every day_.'

"Did your little groupie send you flowers, Clark?"

Clark looked up to see Lois with a hand on her hip. "My groupie?"

"Cat."

He rolled his eyes, "It's more likely to be from your biggest fan, Richie."

"His name is Richard, and he's not my biggest fan."

"Yeah, well, I wouldn't put it past him to send my _wife_ a bouquet of flowers."

"They were on your desk, Smallville."

"Cat doesn't think _that_ highly of me, Lois."

Lois blew a raspberry, "That woman practically worships the ground you walk on, Clark."

"And Richie doesn't worship the ground that _you _walk on?"

"Well at least my stalker isn't a trumped up hero-hater!"

"Well at least my stalker didn't get her job because the editor is her uncle!"

"Oh, so yours is better than mine, then?"

Clark gave her a look, he knew what was coming. "Maybe she is."

"Oh, well I will show you, Kent!"

Lois stomped out of the room and found Richard White standing in the middle of the main floor. Quickly, Richard was flirting with Lois, causing her to casually look back over her shoulder at Clark with a smirk. '_Ok, she wants to play it that way, lets do this_,' he thought.

He walked over to Cat Grant, who was standing at the fax machine.

"Hey Cat."

The blonde turned to face her favorite Daily Planet reporter, "Hey Clark! How are you doing today?"

"Uh, I'm doing alright. What are you working on there?"

"Oh, just doing an article about some of the damages that Superman has caused recently during his 'saves' around the city," she explained.

Clark nearly flinched, "Ah, well, you know how those vigilantes are."

"I know! These vigilantes are so ridiculous, I don't know why we tolerate them!" she laughed.

Clark let out a loud guffaw, making sure Lois could hear him. "I know, their names are insane. The Blur! Green Arrow! Uber-girl! Who comes up with this stuff? It's like a bad high school comic book."

Lois looked across the room with a glare. "Personally, I think the Batman is a far deeper hero to report on."

"Oh yeah, he's so cool. I think it would be just awesome if one of the heros could like, shoot lasers from their eyes? Like, one big laser eye?"

She frowned at him but quickly recovered, "Yeah, that would be just...swell."

"Yeah, you could call him like...the One-Eye Man or something."

Clark's super-hearing picked up their conversation from across the room. '_I _can_ shoot fire out of my eyes you little twit_,' he thought.

"Well Clark?"

He turned to see Cat looking at him expectantly, "I'm sorry, what?"

"Do you want a cookie?"

Noticing the chocolate chips in the cookie, he made a big show of accepting the treat so that Lois would notice. She loved chocolate. Lois glared at him something fierce, but broke into laughter when she noticed Clark choking on the cookie.

"Is that...is that..."

"Mayonaise."

Clark paled considerably, "Oh. Wow." He choked down what was left in his mouth. "I have to...uh...go."

Before she could say anything else, Clark retreated back to the office. Lois followed suit to gloat. "I told you so."

Clark rolled his eyes, "Don't start with me. That idiot was talking about how we need a hero with powers that your husband already has."

"Fine, both of our stalkers suck. Are you happy?"

"Not when yours has to send you flowers and fawn all over you."

"How do you know it wasn't from Blondie? She gave you a cookie!"

Jimmy walked in, seeing Lois and Clark in the throws of quite the argument. They were standing over a vase of flowers, yelling back and forth about why the flowers in question might be from the other's 'secret admirer'. Jimmy had to hold in a laugh.

"Uh, guys?"

"WHAT?" they turned and yelled in unison.

"Those are my flowers..."

Clark's jaw dropped while Lois glared at Jimmy before growling, "What do you mean they are _your _flowers?"

"Uh, well, Lucy is coming by later. It's our anniversary. The flowers are for her."

Neither Lois or Clark could move. Jimmy gave them a strained smile before walking over and plucking up the vase and leaving the office.

"Sooooo..." started Lois.

"Yeah."

Lois kind of grimaced before letting out a chuckle, "Copy room?"

"Copy room."

Out on the main floor, Jimmy could have sworn he saw a streak of red fly past him like a speeding bullet.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Haha, did that work for a Jealous Clark chapter? I tried to set it up so that they were already in bad moods going into this, haha. I hope I didn't make Clark seem like a jerk or anything, I tried to make it almost humorous the way they went at it, haha. Richard White was of course the Richard White from the Superman Returns movie, he was a nice guy and all, but he shouldn't be trying to step into Clois territory, haha.

For any of you that were confused about the One-Eye Man joke with Richard, it's because James Marsden played Cyclops in the X-Men movies. And with all the casting talk, I just watched 'the Social Network' for a second time, and I'm thinking Armie Hammer would have been a great Batman had he gotten the chance to play him in the proposed Justice League movie. Consider him my young Smallville Bruce Wayne, haha.

Well, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought. I was nervous about it, but hopefully you guys like it!

**Next Up:** _Green Arrow_.


	49. Green Arrow

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - The overwhelming positive response will lead to more jealousy based chapters, haha.

_**AmberWaves**_ - Haha, I'm glad you like Jimmy/Lucy and I'm glad that Clark didn't turn out to be a jerk!

_**A,sky**_ - Christian Bale is fine for the Nolan movies, because that's the way that Batman has been portrayed thus far and he suits that Batman. I'm sure you can tell that my Batman is more like the animated series and the Michael Keaton Batman, where he has a sense of humor and can be a bit lighter. That's my only issue with Bale. On the other stuff, I'm glad you like it! haha. And yes, Red-K Clark will be here soon! haha.

_**ElenaIsabella**_ - Thanks!

_**Ina100years**_ - Haha, I thought that was the best part of it for me! All of that and they weren't for either of them, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I actually had the displeasure of eating a mayo-cookie the other day! haha. And I don't like mayo in the first place, but not seeing it coming in a cookie was just terrible! haha. As for the copy room, you didn't hack my notes did you? hahaha. I have a few Jo'an-featured chapters ahead, I just need to complete them and send them on over to mygyps17 and then I'll post them! Oh, and yes, she has scenes with Ollie, haha.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, a lot of people didn't seem to notice that James Marsden was Richard White. Even few people know that his role in Superman Returns is why he was featured so little in the third X-Men movie, Bryan Singer stole him away, haha. The positive response will lead to more jealousy based chapters, haha.

The Jimmy part was my favorite part personally, if I may say so myself, haha. And I too liked Richard White in the movie, simply because I always enjoy the way that he didn't exactly flip out and be all jealous because his fiancee had an eye for Superman. Good guy. The Kill/Kiss Me line (that's so much shorter than the whole title, haha) was an experiment for this chapter. That they spent the whole chapter wanting to kill each other until the end where they, well, ...they did something that involved kissing, haha.

I thought he would be the mysterious ****** **** we heard about showing up towards the end of Season 10, but it looks like that will be Callum Blue as the mysterious Zod. I'm honestly curious as can be as to how he will return, but his contract was for Season 9 and 10, so maybe it was planned out. I too was hoping to see a real Clois marriage on the big screen, luckily in a world where Spiderman was rebooted after just a few years, mabe we'll see Superman get rebooted _again_ and we'll get to see TW and ED steam it up in a Smallville-esque movie!

That was what I was thinking for Bruce and Lois, similar to the 'Chloe' chapter, just more upbeat. And I'm afraid this Green Arrow is from Season 8, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - I know exactly what you mean about fights like that, haha. I'm glad you liked 'Chloe', 'League' was one of my favorites too! Jonathan is a huge fan favorite it seems, and you're right, at least Lois got to have the Kents for as long as she got to have them. I thought Kara was one of my better chapters, haha, so I'm glad that you liked it! Especially the last line, it's one of my favorites! haha. I love James Marsters too, great actor!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked it! I thought having them fight over their stalk.. would be a good compromise, hahaha. And yes, I went with the Squeeky Voice Cat Grant, haha. I can't believe they had two Cat Grants close close together like that, kind of an air ball Smallville Writers. I'm not sure what they were thinking! haha. I too would eat many mayonnaise cookies for a Season 11, haha.

I'm not going to put much fair in anybody until I see a trailer. Like I've said before, Clark Kent is the key part of the character. Any way you slice it, at his core Superman is a small town kid from Smallville, USA, raised with good ole Kent morals and the like. Henry Cavill looks the part of Superman, we'll see how he does as our favorite mild-mannered reporter from the Daily Planet. I don't see Kristin Stewart either, but from what has been recently reported, it's looking like Lois Lane won't be the lead female, which is unbelievably disappointing. That news makes me very, very, very concerned for the film.

There's even whispers that it'll be an origin movie, ala Batman Begins (Superman Starts? haha), with Lana Lang. Ack. Haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, shades of Clana, shades of Lollie.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #49, the Green Arrow

**Author's Note:** Takes place during 'Bride', enjoy!

**

* * *

**

"Want a glass with that?"

Well, this night just keeps getting better, doesn't it? "Oliver. Just the person I want to see right now."

"So, you want to tell me what started this lost weekend?"

They weren't not going to have this talk. "Go on and enjoy the party. Trust me, it'll be a real buzz kill to hear me whine like Patsy Kline."

"Yeah, you're probably right. You know, I may not be at the top of your confidante list, but if you ever want to talk...I'm here."

He sat down. The freakin' idiot sat down. Can you believe this guy? I more or less just told him to get lost. He sat down. I hate men. Oh god, and there is that stupid, stupid, charming Queen smile that makes you just weak in the knees.

"I'm just having all these feelings, and I don't know what they mean." Woah, there's a sigh.

Oliver looked surprised. This wasn't going where he thought it was going to go. "Oh. Well, who's the lucky guy?"

'_He doesn't really think that I'm going to tell him of all people that I've fallen deeply in love with Clark Kent...does he?_'

She nodded, trying to find a way to say this nicely, "Having this conversation with an ex is bad enough without...turning up the awkward dial."

"You know, there's moving on in theory, and then there's the moment it actually happens."

She eyed him curiously.

"If you'd like...we can start now. And I'll just be a really good friend."

To his credit, Oliver Queen was a good man, but she wasn't giving up a name. "Okay." She had to breathe for a moment. "It's like...I was going along and it just snuck up on me. And I tried to ignore it, but then there's these...moments...that you can't. Maybe I was reading it wrong...and to add insult to injury it all went down at tonight's tribute to romantic bliss." Oliver had seen Lois cry, but this was worse than crying.

This was the real pain that tears just aren't good enough for.

"I know it sounds sappy...but I thought...just for a minute...someone needed me."

In that moment, Oliver knew exactly what was going on. "Well, I'm sure he needs you, Lois."

"That's sweet of you to say but...how do you know?"

"Because I know Clark."

She searched his face, but he knew. She knew that he knew. How? She had no idea. But he knew.

"And you think Clark Kent needs Lois Lane? When Lana Lang is conveniently located in that barn right there?"

Oliver sighed, "I've known Clark for a while now."

Lois gave him a funny look, trying to figure out where he was going with this.

"We've had a lot of talks about the man he wants to be. The man that he could be. Now, Lana's been gone for a while now, right?"

"Yeah, so what?"

"I've seen Clark make leaps and bounds towards becoming that man, and he didn't do it alongside Lana Lang. He's done it alongside Lois Lane."

She gave him a skeptical look. "Oliver, seriously-"

"No, Lois, listen to me. Do the math. What has been the difference? Clark Kent _is_ destined to do great things, and he's going to need that Lane Charm to push him where he wants to go. You trust me on that."

"You make it sound like he's going to be some kind of superhero, Oliver."

He had to bite his tongue to keep from confirming the notion.

"Look, all I'm saying is that the Clark Kent I met two years ago was an alright guy. The Clark Kent I know today? I'm proud to call my best friend. And whether either of you realize it or not, I know that it's you that changed him from hick-town farmboy into the man he is today."

"Mild mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper?"

Oliver smiled. "Something like that."

Lois seemed to be taking it all in, but didn't waver. "It doesn't matter. He is in there with Lana now."

"And you're going to take that? Wow, Legs, you've become a softy since we broke up. Did you trade in Whitesnake for Norah Jones too?"

She swatted his arm. "Watch it, Queen. I can still kick your ass."

"Why don't you get in there and kick Clark's ass? Sounds like someone needs to knock some sense into him."

Lois stood up, "Maybe I will."

"I hope so. I can't stand you and Clarkie-Poo's meaningful glances and sexual tension anymore," he joked.

She walked down the steps, "You're such an ass."

Oliver watched her head towards the barn to see Clark. He knew that Lana being here was his fault. He knew that Lois and Clark would have had their little moment if he hadn't told Lana to come along. So for his sake, he just hoped no one asked Lana how she got to the Wedding in the first place.

'_Holy crap Lois would kill me_,' he thought. '_Of course, that would have to be in between kisses with Clarkie-Poo_.'

Lois had just reached the barn when they both heard a large crash, Oliver promptly jumped the railing, "Lois! Get back!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that? I kind of have to imagine that Oliver said _something_ to her like that. The way that she was looking at him in the hospital, I just have to believe her wheels were spinning a hundred miles an hour. She seemed to lost just enough nerve after seeing him with Lana. I know we all hate that the Clois fun got set back that night, but there was still some Clois fun to be had. That near-kiss was like finding a bottle of water in the dessert, it was just enough to keep us going until Season Nine when we finally got to 'Crossfire'! Be honest, it was worth it, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Lana Lang (with a side of Lucy, tease tease! haha)._


	50. Lana

**Review Comments:**

_**katlynne**_ - Haha, I think we might see a scene where she finds out, haha. Now that I think about it, that might be epic, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - I'm glad you liked it! I too despised Lana's return, and well, all her other appearances, haha. Julian Sands was great, he managed to be a kind of dick like Marlon Brando was, haha, while being this really caring and nice guy at the same time. I'm glad you liked Shelby, it was a hit on here, haha. That whole scene was one of my favorite all-time scenes, and I'm glad you liked Bruce!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Crossfire was a long time coming, it was awesome! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - It was a nightmare the way that all unfolded, I'm not really sure what they were thinking. Who sat around the writers table and said "lets mess up what the majority of the fans having been waiting to see for four seasons, that would be a great way to keep the numbers up..."?

I'm not sure when it will be up, but we'll get there sometime soon. It should be pretty funny, haha.

When they said that Christopher Nolan was going to 'godfather' the movie, I was worried it would be an origin story. But when that story came out that they were thinking about going with an older Superman, I was hopeful. Now I'm worried again. The way that I see it, everyone knows how Clark Kent becomes Superman. Just like everyone knows how Bruce Wayne became Batman. Spaceship from Krypton crashes in Middle America, little boy's parents are killed in a dark alley, the general audience knows their origins. The general audience even knows who Lois Lane is and that they work at the Daily Planet.

Would it kill them to jump into the middle of the action with a good movie? I'm kind of bored with these Origin movies, and it sounds like thats what they are going to go with. Kristin Stewart seems out, and fan favorite Anne Hathaway seems unlikely to play Catwoman in Nolan's third Batman movie and Lois Lane in his Superman movie, so we'll see what happens. But like I was saying before, sounds like she's getting the Mary Jane treatment from the Spiderman Reboot (also known as my nightmare, haha). I really hope it turns out to be a very different case.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Like I was telling katlynne, we'll probably see her finding out just because I think it would be hilarious, haha.

I wouldn't say that there's only a few, looking at my to-do list, I'm starting to think I'll be doing this story til I die, haha. Between the heroes, locations, and holidays, we have a long ways to go still. And lately, I've been thinking about doing some of the more popular villains as well. But I agree, it has been an amazing ride and I can't thank you guys enough for coming along on it with me! You guys are the best!

Sadly, that's what I'm afraid is going to happen. It reminds me a lot of whats happening with the Spiderman Reboot. I like Gwen Stacy as much as the next guy, but there's a reason why she dies and Mary Jane becomes Mrs Parker. I hope Zack Synder doesn't mess this up.

_**A,sky**_ - Lana's chapter is not during 'Bride', haha, no worries!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, shades of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Little Jimmy Alert:** Do to a time-line mishap, Jimmy is actually older in our story than he ought to be. At least 18. Bear with me, haha.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #50, Lana Lang

**Author's Note:** The flashback takes place before the very first chapter, 'Picking Lois', but not directly before it. This is what happens right before Lana sees Clark for the first time, hence why we see Jimmy here when he was with Clark when Lana came to made her big speech.

**

* * *

**Lana looked back over her shoulder to see Clark approaching Lois. She knew by the smile on Lois' face that Clark was saying something that made her happy, but it left Lana feeling a cold pang in her stomach. She wanted Clark to put that smile on _her _face, not Lois'.

Maybe she should have listened to Lucy a couple days ago. Maybe Lucy really did know what made Clark happiest.

_"Oh hell no."_

_Lana turned to see a woman standing with one hand on her hip, leg locked in place. The stance was eerily familiar to Lana. "Lucy?"_

_"What do you think you are doing here?"_

_The older brunette furrowed her brow, "What do you mean?"_

_"Didn't you cause enough havoc at my cousin's wedding? Are you back to stand in their way again?"_

_"Lucy, what are you talking about?"_

_A venomous glare took over Lucy's face. "This is the Daily Planet. Where Clark works. With his fiancee. My sister. You know exactly what I'm talking about."_

_Lana's face grew stern. "I know about their engagement."_

_"Yeah, their happiness? I take you've come to ruin it all? Again?"_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"Chloe's wedding? You stopped them from kissing, you know, the moment they'd could have been this happy...sooner? Bitch."_

_Lana looked at the younger brunette in shock. "Who are you to decide what makes Clark happy?"_

_"Oh, I don't know, his sister-in-law perhaps?"_

_"We'll see."_

_Lucy snarled at her and raised her fist to punch her, "You stupid bi-"_

_"Woah! Woah! Woah! Luce, what is going on here?"_

_Jimmy caught Lucy's arm in the backswing, stopping her from slugging Lana Lang where she stood. "Let me go, Jimbo!"_

_"Luce, calm down."_

_Lucy huffed and let her arm fall at her side. "What's going on here?_

_"The bimbo is back for seconds."_

_Jimmy looked at the woman, he recognized her as Lana Lang from one of Henry's pictures. "I'm sure that's not the case, Luce. Right Ms. Lang?"_

_Lana looked away, not answering the intern's question. "Oh. Well, either way, I'm sure that Clark will do what makes him happy."_

_"Which would be my sister."_

_Jimmy squeezed her arm and smiled. "I'm sure CK knows that."_

_Lana looked at the couple with disinterest, "Are we done here?"_

_Jimmy frowned at her, she wasn't exactly being as friendly as someone ought to be when they were just saved from being punched in the face. Then again, there's no telling what Lucy had said to her before he got there. "Uh, yeah, we were just leaving," Jimmy told her._

_As Lana walked by, Lucy motioned like she was going to hit Lana. The elder brunette flinched, causing Lucy to laugh loudly._

_"Stay the hell away from my future brother-in-law, Lang."_

_Lana walked towards the elevator, leaving Jimmy and Lucy to watch her go. "What do you thinks going to happen?" he asked._

_Lucy snorted, "Clark knows Lois will kill him, so he's still going to be kissing my sister on his wedding day."_

_The sweet moment with his secret fun buddy brought a smile to his face, "Yeah, I think so too."_

_"I just hope Lois kills Lana too."_

_"Lucy!" he laughed._

Lana had come to make her one last try at taking Clark home with her. But he had said no. Just like Lucy had said he would.

Those two letters broke her heart, but nothing compared to the way that the next moment broke her heart the most. She walked into the elevator and cast them one last look. Clark was standing very close to Lois, they were whispering back and forth, and Lois was putting her arms around Clark's neck. It broke her heart just watching them, and as the doors closed, so did the gap between their lips.

'_Some love stories are short stories,_' she thought. '_Turns out that Lana Lang and Clark Kent...were a short story._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** I originally planned on this being a little angsty number, but it turned into Lucy standing up to Lana. Haha. I try and avoid character bashing (and pairing bashing), but I can't help but think this is how Lucy would react to seeing Lana Lang show up at the Daily Planet.

Originally, Jimmy mentions that he and Lucy are late for their date. But there is a considerable time crunch between the Bachelor Party (where Lucy and Jimmy first meet) to Evil Lex and Perry (where Lois and Clark are married because of Lex noticing the tan line on her finger where her ring should be and of course Jimmy telling Clark about him and Lucy), so I think Lucy and Jimmy keep it a secret through the wedding, haha.

But for anybody looking for plot development between those two, consider their 'sweet moment' as the start of their escalation from secret 'fun buddies' to secretly dating, haha. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _The General._


	51. The General

**Review Comments:**

**_Unknown_** - Thanks!

_**A,sky**_ - I try to avoid bashing, haha, but I don't think Lucy would bite her tongue.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Well, only she gets the right to do that in her mind, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - haha, Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - Thanks! It's been a wild ride! Haha, I guess we are all synced up in some way! Personally, I loved it. I've always liked my share of cheesy moments, I even loved the old Adam West Batman series, so I didn't mind that they got a bit cheesy during the episode, and of course, having Clark fly was the absolute cherry on top (even if it was in a virtual world, it still shows that Lois' belief in him will make him break the laws of gravity someday). It does feel like the wedding is being a bit rushed, I thought the proposal was as well, but I can't complain about the idea of a Clois wedding, haha.

I'm going to give Zack Snyder a bit of rope to work with as well. I know that no matter how bad the movie might seem, I will still go see it on Opening Night just like I do with every Bond movie, every Indiana Jones movie, and every Comic Book movie. haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Very few people mind when it's Lana bashing, haha!

_**katlynne**_ - Haha, Lois won't be very friendly, that's for sure! Underneath it all, Lois is still Lucy's sister, and that bond is huge. Like I was saying to h-g-j-l-e-r-k above, Lucy might think that she's allowed to test Clark, but nobody else gets that right in her mind! haha.

_**sunset**_ - Lana is pretty much oblivious to everything but her own little world sometimes, so I'm not sure that she does. And if she does, she always seems to trample on through anyways with her own little agenda. Haha, Clarkie-Poo was just an in the moment thing, haha. It is very possible that they think Lois is a drunk because the majority of them haven't consumed alcohol in the past? hahaha.

I saved Lana for the 50th chapter, I was going to post her chapter in the late 30's to early 40's, but then I thought it'd be nice to do it this way instead. I'm glad that everyone liked it. The scene between Lois, Cat, and Clark kind of inspired that little moment, I'll be honest, haha. In a way, I hope it kind of shows that maybe Jimmy is the guy for Lucy because like Lois and Clark, he can temper her Lane insanity, haha.

I'm not sure that Lois _would _confront Lana. Despite everything, I'm not sure that Lois looks back on Lana harshly. Though she might have a few choice words about having to take care of Clark after that whole video thing and everything. I have a whole spreadsheet to keep the storyline intact, haha, believe me when I say it gets very confusing to write on the fly like this sometimes, haha. Believe it or not, it's all one continuity somehow, haha.

Origin stories make sense for characters who haven't been done or (and I hate to say it this way) unpopular comics, like maybe a Green Lantern or a Captain Marvel movie. But characters like Superman, Batman, Spiderman, or even like the X-Men? We already know.

I'll check to see what I can do with Collateral, it might be my chance to do a Dinah Lance chapter (I agree, her acting was awful). Here the next one!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Lanes, and the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**********Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, the General

**Author's Note:**

* * *

The General finished serving the last piece of Turkey, and the dinner began.

"The turkey is great, Lois," chimed Clark.

She fixed a look on him, he couldn't help but gulp and remember their argument from earlier. "I know it's not ham, _but, _I'm glad it can suffice."

He rolled his eyes and let out a sigh, '_Sometimes, I honestly don't know why I speak out loud_.'

"I didn't say that I didn't like turkey, Lois. I just said that I prefer ham when given the choice."

Lois gave him a forced smile, "Whatever makes you happy, Pumpkin."

Clark flinched. A _Pet Name_. That wasn't good news. Jo'an looked up at Lois, "I like turkey, mommy."

"Of course you do, Junior. You're a Lane."

The General watched on with a smile. He knew that Clark didn't mean any harm, he also knew that Lois liked giving him a hard time.

"You know Clark, I enjoy a good honey-baked ham from time to time myself."

Lois dropped the spoon she was holding, Clark nearly choked on a string-bean.

"What?"

"Excuse me, sir?"

_Sllllluuuuuuurrrrrrppppp. _The table turned to see Jo'an watching on in interest, her straw giving away that she had drank all her juice too quickly.

That was the reaction The General was hoping for. "I said that I enjoy ham as well, Lois."

She looked at him wide-eyed. "Well...that's just...grand, _Daddy_."

Clark looked at his wife victoriously, her glare caused him to quickly turn his focus to his plate.

"Anybody home?"

"Aunt Lucy! Uncle Jimmy!" Jo'an screeched, hopping out of her chair and running to the door.

Lucy scooped up the little girl into her arms. "Hey munchkin! Sorry we're late, Jimmy was convinced he knew a short-cut."

"Hey, Lola was the one that offered. I assumed a GPS would know better than us!"

The Aunt and Niece rolled their eyes, "You're silly, Uncle Jimmy. Come on, Mommy is going to kill Daddy." She pulled Lucy's sleeve towards the table.

Lucy looked at the table with a smirk, "Even on a holiday?"

"Yup," replied the youngest member of the group, hopping up back into her chair.

Lucy walked around to give her father a kiss on the cheek, "Happy Thanksgiving, Daddy."

The General was barely able to offer a mumbled reply, he was too busy making Jimmy sweat where he stood. Clark watched the interaction between Sam and poor Jimmy. He considered saying something to ease the tension, but thought the better of it. '_I'm just glad he's off my back now._'

"Lois, Clark, Happy Turkey Day."

Lois made what appeared to be a mix of a snarl and a grin before muttering, "Not if Clark had _his_ way."

Jimmy flinched and gave Clark a clap on the shoulder before sitting down, "Bad?"

"Bad."

The Junior Reporter grimaced, "Oh, and Mr. White told me to tell you two that you have to be back at work tomorrow."

"But it's Black Friday tomorrow!" growled Lois.

Jimmy shrugged and gave them a sympathetic look, "He has a source that says Lex is making a big Communications move, he wants you two on it."

"Well, it looks like your editor has a lot of faith in you two," chimed in the General.

Clark nodded, "Well, Lois is a world class reporter. Lex Luthor doesn't do anything small, you need someone of her caliber on it."

His wife almost blushed at his words. The General smiled fondly at Clark, he wasn't saying that just to say it. He really meant it.

"Does that mean I don't get to go shopping?"

The table looked to the little one at the end of the table. "Oh, I'm sorry, Sweetie, but-" Clark started.

"I'll take her."

Now they all looked at Lucy. "Really?" squealed Jo'an.

"Of course, it'll be a girls day out."

Lois looked at her daughter, she couldn't help but imagine her as a mad scientist with the way she put her hands together and smiled. Clark looked on from the other side of the table and couldn't help but think about how much Jo'an looked like her mother.

Later on, Clark and Lois were cleaning up the kitchen. Jimmy and Lucy went for a walk, both Lois and Clark had bets on when he was going to pop the question now that he survived a dinner with the General. Clark didn't need to use his x-ray vision to notice that Jimmy was fiddling with something in his pocket during dinner, he figured Lois knew as well, she did hint how romantic the loft is at night about fifteen times.

"So Mr. Kent, we going to do this or what?"

Clark looked up to see Lois standing a few feet away, the wishbone in hand. "Do you really want to compete with me, Mrs. Kent?

Lois gave him a cocky look and stepped closer, "Oh, well, you know, I've had more practice than you, Ham-Boy."

He let out a sigh, he couldn't help but smile as he shook his head and took a step closer. "Ever going to let me live that down?"

"Nope," she smiled, now very close. He shrugged and gripped the other side of the bone. After a few moments of staring, they began to pull at the bone. It was Lois that managed to come away with the bigger half. She raised her arms victoriously, "Ha!"

Clark smiled, "It would have been wasted on me anyways."

"How do you figure?"

He pulled her close and kissed her quickly. "What can I wish for when everything I want is right here?"

Now, Lois wasn't the kind of girl that melted at a well timed line. But if she did, she would have just then. And by that, we mean that she did.

"Oh...Smallville."

The General watched from the living room with Jo'an. Ten seconds ago, she was ready to kill him if it meant that she was going to come away with the bigger piece of the wishbone, now she was kissing him as lovingly as a person can. He let out a sigh, "Young love."

"Aint dat da tooth," quipped Jo'an, her mouth stuffed with chocolate.

He couldn't help it. The General let out a hearty laugh and kissed the top of her head. "You said it, Jo-Bear."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? haha. I'll have to find a way to include that Jo'an & Lucy shopping trip into one of the chapters I have on my to-do list, maybe they'll have a guest go along, maybe one of Jo'an's aunts or something. I have so many characters on the list, and yet I always seem to come up with ideas that don't fit, haha. I'm thinking Diana, Dinah, Courtney Whitmore, and Mera make sense since they all need at least chapter. I'll let you guys vote to see which one you want to join Lucy and Jo'an on their shopping trip! Haha, that sounds like fun.

So, how did you like the long awaited dinner chapter? I tried to fit in plenty of stuff for the General, Jo'an, and of course Little Jimmy, haha. I'll have to find a way to do the Jimmy proposal chapter as well! Oh man, so many ideas, I'm going to be writing this story forever! haha.

**Next Up:** _Mother's Day._


	52. Mother's Day

**Review Comments:**

_**Meg**_ - Thanks! I love having the General and Jo'an together! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Because the Lane family (minus Lois obviously) doesn't know about Clark's powers, I kind of think it'd be funny to have someone who is so open about their own powers, like Mera. But I'm going to leave it up to a vote! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - The turkey/ham argument was an actual argument from my thanksgiving, haha, so it was a special moment for me personally, haha. I'm glad that you like them! I've tried to add a special flair to each member. Lois with wanting to impress her dad, Clark just trying to survive (haha), the General with his stern personality but warm heart, and of course Jo'an who ties them all together with her impeccable timing, haha. Adding in Lucy with her sometimes less than diplomatic ways of handling things and Jimmy with his pure fear of the General just makes it better, haha.

A Lucy and Jimmy Chapter seems like a must, doesn't it? But both Lucy and Jimmy are taken already. Might it be time for 'pairing' chapters like Clois, Chlollie, and possible now...wait for it...keep waiting...Jucy? hahaha. Pronounced 'Juicy' of course, haha.

I love Justin Hartley, and I thought that was one of his best performances to date. He was brilliant casting as Ollie.

**_Mpj891_** - Haha, awww, that was so sweet!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I strongly considered having her do her usual snort and walk away, but come on, we had to give Clark at least one, right? haha.

_**Anonymous**_ - Yeah, the thing about Brainiac 5 is that he's also played by James Marsters. I know a lot of ladies love him from his Spike days, but I'm not sure that Kara is one of them, haha. Kara is more or less paired up with Bart at this point in the story, which will be confirmed in 'Supergirl', when we see a very special scene between Kara and Jo'an in a little while, haha. That's everyone's spoiler of the day, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - It was all thanks to mygyps17 for creating that little ball of cuteness! haha.

_**sunset**_ - It's one of my favorites too, haha. I do have to write two Dinah chapters (one as Dinah, one as Black Canary) to meet the Characters and their Alter-Ego quota, the same with Courtney Whitemore. Mera doesn't have an alter-ego, so she only needs one more (not that she won't appear in more), same with Diana since she only needs a Wonder Woman chapter, but that one is already in the works.

Like I was telling h-g-j-l-e-r-k, I too was thinking she might snort and walk away, maybe Clark grabs her hand and pulls her back, giving her a kiss that brings that 'Oh...Smallville' line out of her. But I thought Clark deserved to win at least once over 50 chapters, haha.

Haha, you caught me! Forever is a very long time, we'll see if I can hack it for that long! haha.

As for _my_ review of 'Collateral', I really liked it, even if it was cheesy and what not. Seeing Clark fly with Lois (even in a virtual world) was beyond special, I'm pretty sure my neighbors could hear my girlish screams, haha. I'm man enough to admit it, haha. I thought the acting could have been better from some of the folks, but as usual, Erica Durance blew me away with her well-timed speech about believing in Clark, which is what my Clark is all about.

_**katlynne**_ - I'm not going to lie, he gets it from me, haha. Well, don't wait any longer, here it is! haha. Enjoy!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Haha, yeah, I like to think by now he has warmed up to poor Clark a little more than he had in Harvest, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm not sure if Lucy could take her, Lana still has her powers, haha.

By now, I like to think that the General has grown fond of Clark (even if he doesn't show it all that often), so I like to think that he might side with Clark from time to time just to throw his daughter off, haha. He knows how much Lois likes giving Clark a hard time, so he has to help the guy out! haha.

I hadn't even thought about Zatanna, haha, she is long over-due for an appearance. And you're right, a confrontation might be perfect, haha. I'll have to see what I can whip together. I had this idea for a Mera-Jo'an-Lucy shopping trip, but Zatanna might actually be the perfect fit for what I had in mind. Hmm. I'm still going to let the voting continue just because everyone seems to like doing that, but Zatanna is certainly on my mind now! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Lanes, the Kents, tiniest mention of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**********Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #52, Mother's Day

**Author's Note:** I hope you guys like this one, for whatever reason, I really liked writing it. First section is 'the past', middle section is 'the present', and the last section is 'the future'. Same deal as it was for the Father's Day chapter. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

"How about...you just set the table?"

Lois let out a huff, "Why can't I help _cook_ dinner? I _always_ have to set the table."

Ella shared a look with the General. He gave her a look that clearly said that she was on her own.

"Well...it's because Daddy likes to cook his famous spaghetti on his on, you know that. I can't even help him."

The little girl rolled her eyes dramatically, "I guess. I just want to do something special for you on Mother's Day."

Ella smiled at her daughter and pulled her up into her lap, "Sweetie, you're already the most special thing I could ask for."

Even as a little girl, Lois had mastered the smirk. And a wicked smirk stretched across her face, "Hear that Lucy?" she called towards the crib.

The General dropped his spatula, he was laughing too hard. Ella gave him a half-hearted glare, "Sam!"

"What? She's adorable, El!"

Ella shook her head and laughed. "That's why she adores you so much, you know that? You'd let her get away with murder!"

"Daddy is my hero," quipped the child in her lap.

You could see the red tint grow in the General's cheeks, causing Ella to giggle. "Don't get too used to that, Sam."

"What? Why not?"

"Some boy is gunna come along, and steal your little princess away one of these days."

The General mocked offense. "That's not gunna happen, is it Lo?" She promptly shook her head wildly.

"Someday, she's going to find a boy who will be her new hero," Ella told him, giving Lois a kiss on the top of her head.

Lois pouted and shook her head. "Nope. Never."

"That's my girl," smiled the General.

Lois put a finger to her lower lip and made a thoughtful face,"Unless he has like a really cool cape."

_Clark made his way down the hall. Lois was still in the shower, and he was planning on surprising her. As he walked that way, he couldn't but feel like he was forgetting something. 'Meh, I'll remember sooner or later,' he thought to himself, slipping inside the bathroom._

_About an hour later, they came stumbling out of the steam filled bathroom. "Stop it, Smallville!"_

_"Why?"_

_"Because it tickles!"_

_Clark laughed and threw her over his shoulder, "Put me down you savage!" she giggled._

_"Clark no put down Lois," he joked. She smacked him on the back, trying to wiggle free. He lightly smacked her on her behind._

_"You are so dead, Kent," she growled._

_Clark cradled her in his arms, "I think I like the sound of that."_

_"Do you now?"_

_"I think I do."_

_She buried her face into his neck, causing him to tingle all over. "Lois, I'm going to drop you if you don't stop that."_

_"Being on the ground would have it's advantages."_

_Clark let out a very uncharacteristic groan as they fell to the floor in the hallway. And that's how Martha Kent found them._

_Creeeeeeaaaaaakkkkkkk._

_Lois looked down the hall over Clark's shoulder her eyes narrowed as she tried to make out the shape. "Mrs. K!"_

_Clark's head shot up, "What?"_

_"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" screeched Martha as she ran back downstairs._

_Lois got up and ran into their bedroom to get dressed. Clark laid down on his stomach on the floor, letting his forehead smack on the ground._

_"I knew I forgot something important. Happy Mother's Day..."_

_Downstairs, Martha couldn't help but let herself overcome to giggles as she heard Lois yell at Clark about making her forget what day it was._

"Oh Joey, your powers are so much further along than your dad's where at this age."

Jo'an makes a very smug face and looks very proud of herself, "Aunt Kara says that girls mature faster than boys."

Martha smiles. "It sure looks like it, sweetie."

Clark made a sour face, "Just because I had to wait until high school to peek at presents doesn't mean I wasn't mature."

"Smallville, you were about as immature as they came when I met you. And that was your senior year."

He let out a small laugh, "Says the woman wearing a pair of smelling, goofy, pink bunny slippers."

Lois looked at him with a fierce glare, "You take that back."

"I uh...I think I will take something...I think...I think that's a good idea, dear."

Clark promptly super-sped the slippers off Lois' feet and sped towards the back door of the kitchen, where he stood laughing.

"Junior! Get him!"

Jo'an tore off after him and they started to chase each other around the back yard. Martha and Lois run up the porch and watched them race around at speeds so fast that they could barely tell who was who. Jo'an quickly jumped onto Clark's back, trying to wrestle the slippers from him.

"She has so much energy, I don't know how you keep up with her," laughed Martha.

Lois gave her a look. "Is it bad that I want to stab Clark in the neck sometimes just because he _can _keep up with her?"

"As long as you don't think badly of me for feeling the same way about Jonathan," laughed Martha.

A look from Lois had Martha explaining.

"Jonathan and Clark always had so much in common. They had their chores, working on the truck or the tractor, or playing football in the backyard. I never had anything like that with Clark. I was more of the 'matters of the heart' outlet in his life."

Lois raised her eyebrows, she knew what that meant: _Lana Lang_.

"I'm going to be honest with you, Lois. It got _really _old hearing about the girl next door."

Lois laughed. "Mrs. K with the Lana bashing, I like it...but don't tell Clark I said that."

Martha slapped her arm softly. "Lana was a sweet girl, but like I said, Jonathan and Clark had so much in common." Lois looked confused. "They both needed a woman who wasn't afraid to kick them in the butt." That brought an mega-watt smile to Lois' face.

"I love being in DC, but I wish I would have been around for that, Lois. You've always been the one." Martha placed a hand on Lois' hand.

Lois squeezed her hand and nearly teared up. Okay. She did tear up. Just don't tell Clark. "That means so much, Mrs. K."

Martha gave her a stern look. Lois laughed and wiped her eye, "Fine, _Mom._"

The two shared their moment of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law bliss before Lois looked towards the barn. "Junior! Put the tractor down!"

**

* * *

Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I tried to do sappy-funny-sappy, haha. Who says you can't make Mother's Day sexy? haha. I didn't have much to go on with Ella Lane, so I hope you guys like my guess at what she might have been like. Also, I hope everyone liked a much more cuddly version of the General, haha, it was quite hard to keep making him seem like a happy fella, haha.

Hopefully the Lana thing was ok, haha, I tried to make it clear that Mrs. K liked Lana and all, she just likes Lois more, haha. Also, don't forget to vote about who goes on the shopping trip with Lucy and Jo'an (Dinah, Diana, Courtney, Mera, or Zatanna!). Shoot me a review! Tell me what ya thought!

**Next Up:** _Lois Lane._


	53. Lois

**Review Comments:**

_**MegasaurusRex101**_ - I very much so agree. I've always had a feeling that before Ella's death, the General was a very different man.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, I can only imagine the chaos, hahaha. They'd be banned for life! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! It of course counted, haha, Mera seems like the popular choice so far. Up there with Zatanna.

**_katlynne_** - Haha, yeah, I can't decide between wanting the shopping partner to be someone Lucy can be devious with or someone that Lucy doesn't gel with because they both have such promising possibilities, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I love that name, Lady Fishnet, maybe I can write two Zatanna chapters if I use that as her Superhero name, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - I think that Lois and Martha have a special bond as Kent-spouses, but more importantly, Kent-partners. As for Ella and the General, it is sad that things don't work out, but I'm sure he wouldn't trade those moments with her for anything. It seems even more fitting now after seeing 'Collateral', huh? haha. Pregnant Women are scary, haha, and since it's Lois, she ought to be extra scary.

Jonathan is one of my favorites, so that means a lot to me. Thanks! Jo'an was all mygyps17, can't take any credit there, haha. Well, as you try to not run out of words, don't expect to hear me complain if you keep reviewing, haha. It's what keeps me going, the interaction with folks that like these stories! Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked it. Chapters like this, Father's Day, and Valentine's Day really offer up the chance to cross multiple time periods and multiple characters and themes. That makes it a lot of fun to write. I'm glad you like my version of Lois, haha.

_**sunset**_ - I actually had a chapter all set up where the General and Ella brought Baby Lois to visit Chloe in Smallville, but Clark's line in 'Committed' about having known Chloe since the 8th grade made me go back to realize that Chloe didn't really grow up in Smallville after all. But that idea with the park is a good one, I'll see what I can work out, I already know how it would end, haha.

Originally, Martha called her by Jo'an because I've never seen her say 'John' or 'Johnny' or 'Lo' or anything like that. She seems to always call people by their name and I was going to follow that recurring theme. Then I changed it to just 'Jo', and then I thought about giving her a special name to call her, but at the end of the day, I think 'Joey' might stick with some people because it really is just the cutest nickname, haha.

Supposedly Martha has a big scene coming up with Lois in 'Beacon', so cross your fingers! haha. I like to leave you guys with a laugh. It seems like a good way to end any chapter if I can wing it. And I agree, I always like it when Lois ends up getting the last word, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #53, Lois Lane

**Author's Note:** This one has a surprise ending, so in the words of Alfred Borden, "Are you watching closely?" haha. Takes place post-'Crossfire'.

**

* * *

**

The cafe was small, but at least it was far from Smallville. The person and the town.

Lois waited on her cup of coffee anxiously. It had been almost a whole day since her kiss with Clark, but she was still thrown. Sure, Clark had been less than subtly implying that he wanted a second chance with her after the Monster Truck Rally debacle. It was still a pretty big surprise when he had grabbed her in the middle of the Daily Planet and laid one of the steamiest kisses she had ever had the pleasure of being a part of on her.

She wasn't sure what it meant. She _did_ kiss him back. She _did_ enjoy it. She _did_ want to do it again. _Did_ that mean they were dating?

'_Wait, let's not count our chickens before they hatch. Who says that kiss means Clark wants a relationship? Maybe he just wants to have some fun?_' Lois snorted. '_Yeah right, because Clark Kent is the booty call type._' She started to laugh uncontrollably, causing some of the cafe's patrons to stare.

Lois cast an awkward smile of apology across the room. Across the room the waiter smiled at her. He poured a cup of coffee and made his way to where Lois was sitting. Lois gave him a smile and she sipped on her coffee, when she let out a moan, the waiter couldn't help but chuckle.

"You have no idea how bad I needed that," she told him.

"I can tell."

Lois let out a loud sigh. "I just have a lot...on my mind. I'm kind of running away from a situation."

He sat down on the other side of the table, causing Lois to look up in surprise. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"With a complete stranger?"

"Some folk tell me a pretty good listener."

She eyed him for a moment. "Ok. I'll give you a shot. What do I have to lose?"

"Exactly. So...what exactly is your trouble?"

Lois let out a sigh. "There's a guy I work with that...I kind of, sort of, maybe, might have feelings for. And he kind of kissed me."

"And the problem is?"

"That I'm not supposed to have feelings for him?"

"Why not?"

She was starting to regret this. "Because he's not...like other...he's just too...Clark."

The waiter frowned.

"I just...He isn't...I can't lose him."

"I see..."

Lois sucked in a big breath and held it for a few seconds, "If we date, and it falls apart, I don't know if I can live with that."

"What if you don't? Fall apart, I mean?"

She rolled her eyes, "Every relationship falls apart one way or another."

"But if you and this...Clark, don't fall apart, wouldn't it be great? Stuff of legend great?"

Lois let out a laugh, "Oh yeah, me and farmboy? We'd have half a dozen movies and a TV show written up about us."

She tried not to blush too hard when she thought of what rating those movies might get, '_Have you seen that boy's abs? Hubba Hubba._'

The waiter gave her a funny look. "Kind of sounds like you're just a chicken."

Jaw. Dropped.

"What the hell did you just say I was?"

The whole cafe turned to look at Lois. Once again, she cast around a strained smile of apology. "What did you just call me?" she asked a bit quieter.

"I think it's pretty clear that you have big time feelings for this Clark guy. He wasn't afraid to take a leap of faith, he kissed you and all. Sounds like you're just being a chicken. If he's willing to take that leap, why can't you?"

Lois eyed him from across the table. '_I hate how this guy makes it sound so simple._'

"So, whats a guy with all this wisdom doing waiting tables?" she quipped, trying to deflect from her and Clark.

The waiter smiled at her while stifling a laugh, "Actually, I'm going to school full-time, this job just helps with the rent."

"Oh, well that's good. What are you going to school for?"

He frowned, "I'm not sure quite yet, I just want to make a difference in the world. I have a friend who is a real hero type," he let out a laugh, "I'm just trying to find something so I can do my part. Maybe something in politics."

"Ah, Clark is like that. I swear, he thinks he's a superhero sometimes. He's always jumping into some kind of trouble. A couple weeks ago he tried to fight off a pack of zombies like he was Ash from 'Evil Dead' or something, what is it with guys and their 'Hero Complexes'?"

The waiter gave her a smile. "He sounds like a great guy."

"He is," she replied dreamily. '_And he was some kind of sexy that day. The way he carried me up the stairs? Oh boy..._'

"So what are you going to do?"

Lois looked up in surprise, "Huh?"

"About Clark? Are you going to give the guy a chance? You going to take that leap of faith?"

She bit her lip, "Part of me wishes I could go back and everything would go back to normal."

'_Maybe I can go back, and everything will go back to normal,_' she thought, but her eyes rolled almost subconsciously. '_Like you're going to walk in there and not fall totally in love with him when he bats his baby blues your way? Don't kid yourself, Lois._'

"Or maybe I'll give him a chance. Give us a chance." Yeah. She liked the sound of that.

He nodded with a grin, "I think that's a good idea."

Lois smiled at the waiter, "Yeah, I think I will...but I'm going to let him stress for a few days. Thanks for everything...", she looked for his name, "Pete." She couldn't contain a wicked smile as she rose from her seat and made her way out of the small cafe.

As Pete Ross watched Lois Lane get in her car and peel out towards Metropolis, he couldn't help but smile at the woman he recognized from the pictures in the Daily Planet. She might not have known it, but he knew this 'Clark' fella a lot better than she thought he did.

"Looks like Clark finally got around to deciding between killing and kissing her after all," he said before turning back to the cafe.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope I didn't give away who it was! haha. I thought I might have with that throw in about politics, those of you that are familiar with the comics know that Pete was Lex Luthor's Vice-President at one point and President following Lex's impeachment.

Anyways, what did you think? I got a request to see Lois' reaction to the whole 'Crossfire' incident. Given her behavior in 'Idol', I'm not sure she had made up her mind completely but was definitely leaning towards giving them a chance. Clark trying to save her without powers (so she thinks) is what tipped it into Clois' favor, so I wanted something a little ambiguous, but indicated she was leaning towards giving Clois a chance.

I hope you guys liked it, shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** _the Bathroom._


	54. The Bathroom

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, it's kind of sad that we won't see Pete this season because of his arrest and all. I would have liked to have had him back, I'd really like to see all the main cast members come back like Whitney Fordman, Jason Teague (flashbacks perhaps?), and Davis Bloome.

What if I promise a chapter that would do that, like a 'Girls Night Out' chapter? haha.

**_A,sky_** - Haha, that was my favorite line too!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - She probably has, haha, but that would have spoiled my fun, now wouldn't it? haha. I'm sure I'll have a chapter where Lois has to face him knowing that she spilled her guts to him without realizing who he was, haha. Clark and Pete were friends in the comics, but he didn't know Clark was Superman until much later in life, I think he learned it after he was vice-president or during. In the comics, Pete was married to Lana and they had a son together, Clark Ross. Talk about a different story compared to the way things went on Smallville, haha.

I honestly can't remember why Lex chose Pete though, it's been forever since I read a Superman comic, haha.

_**AmberWaves**_ - Haha, Mother's Day is right up there with my favorites so far, so I'm glad you liked it.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Originally I was thinking about having it be Diana Prince, but Washington, DC is a long ways to drive, haha.

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - I've always been more of a Marvel fan myself with the exception of Batman, always one of my favorites from childhood. It really helped that Batman had an animated cartoon, which I imagine led to my Marvel preference with the Spiderman and X-Men shows. Superman came and went for me, he was always too powerful for my taste, but I more or less kept up with the overall series of events going on in Clark Kent's world.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Haha, I'm glad I surprised you. I was worried about showing my hand, I edited a lot of lines to try and make it less obvious, haha.

_**Ina100years**_ - Calling Lois Lane a chicken would have ended with most people's funeral, haha, but Pete lucked out because he had a witnesss-packed cafe at the moment, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**JamesTKent**_ - Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - The whole 'big surprise' thing is a bit overdone at times, so I wanted something more logical for Lois' thought process. She already knew that she was falling in love with Clark during 'Bride', by the time that 'Crossfire' rolled around, she ought to have known that she was in fact in love with him. I wanted it to be more about her fear of losing Clark if things went south ("You're the one I want to get it right with." - Disciple), and less about trying to figure out what her actual feelings were. So I'm really happy that you enjoyed it all the same.

I imagine that there _will be_ nakedness, but you might have to continue from where we leave off to get there, haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I always find myself wanting to add Dick Grayson, he's easily one of my all-time favorites, but I have to keep reminding myself that he's a little too young to be appearing pre-Jo'an, haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**superrouge17**_ - That's actually the plan! haha.

_**sunset**_ - Well, I'm with Lois Lane when it comes to destiny: I only believe in the kind you make happen. Haha. With that in mind, I don't mind hearing about Lois and Clark's destiny because I believe that they'll do anything to make sure it happens.

Haha, I think I might get lynched by the Lana-lovers on FanFiction if I did that, haha. But I've written the bulk of the chapter, I bet you won't see it coming when you read the title, haha, but it should be up soon enough. And yes, Clark does take notice to Lois, haha. That does sound like a good idea, how about everyone suggests their favorite Martha nicknames for Jo'an, haha, that should be pretty funny! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, the Bathroom

**Author's Note:** This one takes place, and I'm going to take a rough stab here, about roughly 8 months before 'Emil'. Hahahaha.

**

* * *

**

"It's your fault."

Clark let out a laugh, "What? How is this my fault?"

"All the...nakedness!"

He looked at his wife and laughed again, "What are you talking about?"

"Well...the first time we met..."

"Yeah?"

"Naked!"

He closed his eyes and shook his head, still laughing. '_She has lost her mind..._'

"And then your little...little...wet...steamy...naked...shower!"

"What?"

"When your mom caught us?" She looked at him with eyes narrowed, as he remembered the day she pounced, "Exactly!"

Clark bit his tongue and just as equally narrowed his eyes, "_You_ barged in...on _my_ shower."

_Lois listened on the other side of the door, a wicked grin forming on her face. 'This is going to be sooooooo good,' she thought._

_Just act casual. Just act casual. "Nothing like a little 'North by Northwest' action to get the blood pumping."_

_A gasp, a flitter with the shower curtain, and the awkward start to his statement told her it was working._

_"Ummm...we usually take turns in the bathroom."_

___He couldn't see her face, but the expression was nothing short of devilish. _'But what if I wanted to join you, Farmboy?' 

_"Oh, don't start with me, Smallville. You're the one taking the marathon shower. Besides, my delicate feminine sensibilities weren't offended the first time I got a glimpse of uh...Clark Jr." She couldn't help but smirk at the comment, she noticed him squirm in the mirror's reflection._

_"My parents kind of missed the whole Woodstock phase. Besides, they freaked out the last time they caught me in a co-ed situation."_

_Her ears perked up at that, 'Might I be doing less corrupting than originally intended? Do tell...'_

_"Last time? So, the Eagle Scout does have a few secrets in the closet?"_

_She waited for him to emerge from the shower. Unfortunately, he had found a towel. "Just forget about it alright? That's my shirt!"_

_Making sure she got between him and the door, she quipped, "It's the only thing that I could find that was clean."_

_'So not true, but I'd be willing to take it off for you if you bat those pretty baby blues at me...' she thought, happy her cheeks were already red from the heat so that he couldn't tell all that bare chest was doing something...interesting...to her._

"And lets not forget the time you snuck up on me at the Talon!"

_That was the door. Why was the door shutting? Like...right after she could have sworn somebody was peeking at her? Turning the water off, she tried to mentally prepare herself for whatever ass-kicking was about to go down._

_"Hello?"_

_She saw the shadows flicker under the door frame. Yep. There was going to be ass-kicking._

_Slowly getting out of the tub, trying to avoid alerting whoever was outside of the bathroom door to her presence, she crept towards the door. She grabbed the first, large, skull-cracking weapon she came across. Raising it over her head, she could have sworn their was a small voice in the back of her head asking why she didn't take a second to grab one of the two or three towels she had passed on her way to the door._

_Because what if it was...she opened the door._

_'Clark!' she screamed internally._

_Yes. What if it was Clark? And it was. Standing on the other side of the door, finally evening up their score of nakedness, because she stood before him in all of her glory. Soaking wet. Raising some sort of brush...thingy over her head to attack him._

_She did the only thing she could do. She jumped back and slammed the door shut. Grabbing a towel, wrapping it around herself, she wrenched the door open and threatened him again with her brush...thingy. "What are you doing here?"_

_"Lois, I've been calling. Knocking on the door. How long have you been in there?"_

_She made a face, "About an hour and a half."_

_'Wait, why aren't I suspecting him of checking me out in the bathroom?' she thought._

_Her inner voice chimed in, 'Because he isn't that kind of guy and if he was, you wouldn't have minded.'_

_'Shut your face, inner...me.'_

_She spun around to face Clark to prove her inner-voice wrong, "Hey! You weren't just in my bathroom, were you?"_

_'See.'_

_'Doesn't prove anything.'_

_'Dammit.'_

_He gave her a look, "Lois, I just walked in the apartment."_

_"Well that's weird, because I could have sworn somebody was in there watching me."_

Clark rolled his eyes, "I told you, it was Graham Garrett! He was an assassin who could be invisible!"

Lois huffed, "Uh huh, everyone knows Clark Kent can't resist a peek at the goods."

He let out a laugh, "You jumped out at me!"

"As if, Smallville. You just like to remember it that way so you can keep your noble sensibilities intact." She knew she was stretching now.

Clark just hung his head and laughed. She was completely flying off the deep end here.

"So?"

He looked up, "So what?"

"Are we in an agreement?" He gave her a confused look. "That it's all your fault?"

Another eye roll, another laugh, another sigh. "Lois, it takes two to tango."

"Well, I blame you."

"Lois, why does there have to be someone at blame here? It's not like it's a bad thing."

She snorted, "You're not the one that has to carry the monster for nine months! And would you quit looking so happy?"

"I am happy!"

"Well, so am I!"

Clark couldn't help it, he broke down laughing again. She was being insane! "Then why are you so mad!"

"Because I want to be!"

"That doesn't make any sense!"

"But it's the way that it is. Don't mess with the system, Smallville. I should be freaking out, I should be terrified!"

"But?"

"But I'm not! I feel great! I feel excited! And I'm blaming you for it!"

"Then what do you want me to do?"

"I don't know! Quit making me feel all warm and fuzzy and girly. I wanna be mad. I want to freak out! I want to want to kill you!"

Clark closed his eyes and smiled, '_I'm never going to understand this woman._'

"Alright, fine. Kill me. Come on." Clark held out his arms, inviting Lois to attack him. She narrowed her eyes and glared at him.

She ran at him, tackling him to the ground, but she didn't kill him. She kissed him. A lot. When she pulled back, she looked him square in the eye. He tucked a stray hair behind her ear and smiled up at her. Their looks contained so much love. "Smallville...we're having a baby."

"We're having a baby," he whispered.

They kissed again.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Awww, haha, what did you guys think? I'm sure some of you figured it would be more steamy, haha, but I got a request to cover 'Gone' and 'Fade' with a Bathroom chapter, so this is what came of it, haha. If it makes you feel any better, there was plenty of sex that led up to their current situation and there will probably be some floor sex after their conversation, haha.

**Next Up:** I'm thinking '_Wonder Woman'_, but it could be '_Clark Luthor_', '_Christmas Day_', 'J'onn J'onzz' or '_St Patricks Day_'. They are all close to done.


	55. Ultraman

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - That's the plan, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I thought you might like that!

What was the line in the very first chapter? "She was going to kill him. Very, very slowly over the rest of their lives, and he was going to love every minute of it." Haha. I think that Clark doesn't mind at all. Lois just loves giving Clark a hard time, and she loves even more that he doesn't fold under it, haha.

Haha, I'll make sure to throw some goodies in for you then! haha.

_**Meg**_ - Thanks!

_**katlynne**_ - Yeah, I'm disappointed in him too. Between Smallville and Blue Mountain State, he should have had himself a nice career but he went and screwed it up with this drug problem. It's a shame. I'm glad that you liked Lois' behavior, it was the hardest part to write, haha.

**_jade2nightwing_** - Haha, it's hard for me to feel sorry for a guy pinned under Lois Lane.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, the imagination is a beautiful thing, isn't it?

_**sunset**_ - It is nice to have just Lois and Clark sometimes, isn't it? haha. It seems funny to say it, but they really know how to make a scene seem like it's a much bigger party, haha. I'm glad that I can keep making the title sneak-in's fun for you! haha.

I think that's my favorite line too.

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - I can't say enough about you taking the time to comment on every chapter like this, haha, you're fantastic!

I'm glad you liked her reaction to being pregnant, I thought she might do something like that, haha. They are both a couple of idiots, haha, but they're a couple of idiots in love whether they like to admit it or not. With their rivalries over Jo'an and her affections, it seemed like a natural idea for them to try and be the Santa Claus for her, haha. Cat Grant seems like a natural foil for Lois, but not as a serious competitor for Clark's affection, just annoyance, haha.

Clark and "Gulp" go hand in hand when he's around the Lanes, haha. And yes, Jimmy has a bit of a death wish.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** T?

**Pairing:** one-sided Clois, Lois/Bruce, implied Lois/Oliver

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #55, Ultraman

**Author's Note:** This one is pretty angsty and pretty dark. Hope you guys still like it though, enjoy! Sorry it's late!

**

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**

"_Wayne Enterprises CEO Bruce Wayne was murdered last night at age twenty-four. His body was found at the Luthor Mansion in Smallville, Kansas. Early reports indicate that Wayne attempted to save Luthorcorp CEO Lionel Luthor when an attack was made on his life earlier that evening._"

The press hadn't slowed down at all. Clark Luthor stood in front of the TV, tying his black tie. His father paced behind him. He was furious with Clark for the night before's events. Lionel had paid off several reporters, several of the forensic team members, and of course spun his best tale.

"You have put this entire family at risk! Lex would never have been so careless! So thoughtless!" screamed Lionel.

Clark didn't care. He had cleaned up enough of his father's messes that it only seemed fair that Lionel would clean up one of his. After all, it was Lionel who had taught him to fight for what he wanted. It was Lionel who beat into his brain that he could have the world. But he only wanted one thing.

Lois Lane.

The beautiful reporter from Luthorcorp Media. She wasn't afraid of Clark. No matter how many threats and how impressive his glare was, she was always ready to challenge him. He had fallen quick. She was everything he wanted. She never backed down, and she wasn't afraid to fight for what she wanted. The only problem was that she didn't want him, she wanted that fool from Gotham: Bruce Wayne.

_"Clark, I want you to meet my friend, Bruce Wayne."_

_Bruce turned to see Clark. "Ah, well, how are you doing, old friend?"_

_Clark's eyes flashed with anger, but a smile forced it's way onto his face. Lois glanced between the two of them. "You know each other?"_

_"Clarkie and I used to go to school together. And Oliver of course."_

_Lois seemed surprised, but it shouldn't have been a surprise that the head of Wayne Enterprises, partner of Queen Industries, knew the son of the Luthorcorp Empire. "Oh, well, then I guess we're having a bit of a reunion then."_

_"It's nice to see you, Wayne," he forced for Lois' benefit. She scolded him though, "Clark."_

_Letting out a breath, "Bruce."_

_Bruce on the other hand seemed amused. "There ya go, buddy. That wasn't too hard, was it?"_

_"Bruce is in town working on a deal with Oliver Queen."_

_Clark nodded, "Yes, I heard about that. Working on a contract with the Earth Station."_

_"You stay well informed."_

_"I am the editor for the Daily Planet, Wayne. It's my job to stay well informed."_

_Lois noted the tension, but choose not to think about it too much. "Well, me and Bruce were just on our way to dinner. I wanted to stop by."_

_She gave Clark a quick kiss on the cheek. Bruce noticed Clark's expression and smirked. 'Looks like Luthor wants more than just friendship.'_

At the funeral, he stood by her. She was devastated. He admired Lois for her big heart in many other situations, but he couldn't help but feel disappointed that she had left it so unguarded from Wayne. She had known him for a few weeks, how could she have let herself be hurt this badly? He didn't know what to do when people began to leave. She seemed to want to stay longer, so he pulled her close and stayed with her.

"How could someone do something like this?" she cried.

"I didn't mean to..." he whispered into her hair, but she pulled back and look at him. He didn't mean to do that. He tried to look away.

"You weren't...you weren't...you weren't home that night. Were you?"

Clark just stood there.

"Clark."

She thought for a moment that the drop sliding down his cheek was a tear, but it was too hard to tell as his face was pelted with rain drops.

"Please, Clark."

_"Lois?"_

_Bruce entered the study. He had gotten a message from one of his assistants that Lois wanted to meet here. Personally, he despised the Luthors. But Lois liked Clark, so he was going to suffer through it. A part of him knew that when it was time to go back to Gotham, Lois wouldn't be coming with him. He had decided that he would enjoy the time that they had together, even if that meant socializing with a Luthor._

_"Lois? Are you in here? I got your message."_

_"She won't be coming."_

_Bruce looked up to see Clark Luthor standing in the library upstairs. "Luthor. She left me a message-"_

_"My assistant left a message."_

_He looked annoyed at Clark's game. "What do you want?"_

_Clark walked down the stairs and made his way to the desk, "I want you to leave Metropolis."_

_"I'll be gone soon enough, Luthor. Don't you worry about it."_

_"Believe me, I'm counting down the days. But I want you to leave now. Your goons can take it from here, can't they?"_

_Bruce frowned, "What's this about?"_

_"Lois is falling for you, Wayne. I don't want to see her get hurt when you take off. That's what you and Queen do, isn't it? You leave girls behind, broken and alone. All because you have mommy and daddy issues? Orphan issues that have you scared of commitment? Lois deserves better than that."_

_"Better, huh? So what, you'd have me leave her for you? If she deserves better than me, she damn sure deserves better than you."_

_Clark's eyes flashed with anger. "Watch it, Wayne."_

_"What? You think I didn't know about your little crush? Figures really. Man like you, you want what you can't have. Lois isn't the kind of girl who swoons over bank accounts and corporate titles. Must drive you crazy that all your prestige and money, and she still prefers Orphan Bruce."_

_In a flash, Clark had lifted him against the wall by his neck. Bruce struggled against the wall, but Clark's grip was like a vice._

_"What are you going to do, Luthor? Kill me like you killed Lex?"_

_Clark began to shake with rage and gripped tighter, "Shut up."_

_"She doesn't want you."_

_He threw Bruce across the room, "You think...do you...do you think I care what you think!"_

_Bruce was slow to rise, rubbing his neck. "You're still that arrogant, power hungry monster I knew at Excelsior."_

_"You stay away from her, Wayne."_

_He let out a cold chuckle, "Or what? You're going to use your freak powers? You think you scare me? You're just a freak, Clark! You always were!_"

Clark saw red that night and those were the last words that Bruce Wayne ever spoke.

"Please, Clark. I'm begging you, say something," Lois plead.

"I'm sorry, Lois. I'm so sorry."

She stepped back. The look on her face, it broke what was left of his heart into a million pieces. She sputtered, "You didn't..."

Clark closed his eyes. Once again, she couldn't tell if they were tears or rain drops. "I'm sorry."

Lois' lip began to quiver. She shook her head, she didn't want to believe it, but his face told the whole story. His face told her that he killed Bruce Wayne in cold blood. The face was not entirely familiar anymore. There was a trace of something that she had never seen there before.

He had finally become the man his father wanted him to be.

Clark reached out for her arm, but she jerked it away. "Don't touch me."

It seemed like an eternity as he watched her walk away. He didn't know what to do, so he just stood there. The rain beat down on his shoulders, and he looked at Bruce's tombstone. If Clark had been able to control himself, Lois would still be here. She wouldn't hate him for what he had done. All this time, he would have given anything just to kiss her, now, she looked like she wanted to kill him. Then again, it's not like she knew that Bruce was far from his first.

Clark felt his arm where he felt his constant reminded of his last moments with Lex. This day was a long time coming.

In the distance, he could see her standing in the rain. Her face was covered in wetness, but it wasn't from the rain. Her boyfriend was dead. And as far as she was concerned, so was her friend. Clark thought about going to her, but as Oliver Queen wrapped an arm around her, she was gone.

Lois Lane was the last remanent of humanity left in his life. As she walked away, so did all traces of _Clark_. All the was left, was _Luthor_.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, that was angsty, haha. I hope that you guys liked it though.

My thought is that this takes place a while before 'Luthor', and that this is the reason that Lois hates Clark so much. It lets everyone have their 'they found each other in every universe' slice, but lets us have the cake as well that is the reality of 'Luthor'. We leave it with Oliver and Lois potentially getting together and all of this ought to lead to the world we see in 'Luthor'. I know that in my 'Earth-2 Lois' chapter, there isn't much implication that Lois was ever friends with Clark, but you can probably say that there isn't much to say that they weren't. Just that he was a monster now.

Anyways, I don't know. I wanted to have Clark Luthor be a bad guy, and with the request to see Lois with Bruce to provoke jealously in Clark, this is what I came up with. Obviously, killing a guy is pretty much as bad as it gets jealousy wise, haha.

**Next Up:** _J'onn J'onzz _or_ Wonder Woman_, haven't decided yet.


	56. Anniversary

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, I think that's what makes it the most sad. What if...

_**GDani**_ - Haha, I haven't thought too much about life after this series (they're going to find me and hurt me if i ever stop, haha), but I'm sure I'll be around.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Yeah, I didn't think it would be a favorite, haha, but I couldn't bring myself to write a _nice_ chapter about Clark Luthor. For everyone that likes him for his bad ass ways, they're just going to have to enjoy Red-K Clark, I had to write him like the monster he is. Humor and Romance is my preference as well, and I think you'll enjoy this one because it's full of it, haha.

Deep down, it's what is best for Lex. If Clark is with Lois, then Lana is up for grabs and that's what he really wants. Isn't the Bowtie nickname priceless? haha, it just fits poor Jimmy so well and the Lanes' love giving their spouses nicknames it seems, haha. All the credit of the Man of Mush line goes to LoisNClark4Ever for the idea, haha. I'm glad that you liked the costumes bit, haha, I too agree that Stiletto (and of course that horribly done accent, haha) was very sexy.

Nothing about Lois and Clark is rational, haha, but I'll be damned if there isn't passion! haha.

_**katlynne**_ - I'm sorry! haha. I hope this one cheers you up, I wrote it to cheer us all up! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Awww, I'm so glad that you liked it! I knew that I wanted to kind of show how he fell into being a monster, and it seemed natural that losing Lois might send him down that road. I know that it's a big thing to show that Lois and Clark are together in every universe and what not, and while I tend to shy away from that idea, it seemed like a good backstory for why he took the turns he took.

It was also really important to me that if he was going to do something, he was going to do something unforgivable that would send her away and cause her to hate him like she hated him in 'Luthor'. So I'm really glad that you liked it! haha. You'll get bad ass Clark when he finds some Red-K, i promise, haha.

_**sunset**_ - The whole thing was painful to write! haha. I had to keep calling him 'Luthor' as I wrote 'Clark' because it was killing me to write him that way, I'm just too attached to good Clark, haha. I don't know if Lois will ever forgive him and I don't know if he will ever forgive himself, but after meeting our Clark, I think that Lois might be ready to give him a second chance, if only to see if she can find that man she met on the rooftop that day.

I'm still going to write a 'Clark Luthor' chapter, hence why I switched up the names at the last minute from 'Clark Luthor' to 'Ultraman'. I'm kind of planning on it being quite a bit lighter, possibly with interactions with Lionel and Lex, that show that Clark Luthor was once, at the very least, the kind of person that Lois would want in her life. But he will still be far from the Clark we know and love, just has to be...

_**alexindigo**_ - Thanks! I'm really glad that you liked it. Like I've been saying, it was a tough one to write because I just never see Clark that way. I wanted his fall to be like any great tragic villain's fall: a tremendous mistake that happened despite good intentions.

It doesn't really get much more tragic than this. He was raised to be a Luthor, and that's what you get. Someone that goes too far to get what they want and that breeds a habit of collateral damage behind them. In this case, it was Bruce's life and Clark's relationship with Lois. It's something that he will feel guilty over for the rest of his life, and everyday without Lois Lane in his life will be a reminder of how far he has fallen.

_**cathy03**_ - You're back! You have been missed! haha.

There is a Mera chapter left to be written, you never know! haha. I didn't know about their mythos either, so I choose to write it a bit ahead in the future when if nothing else, they might be young adults. I tried to avoid any sort of mention of age for that reason. Just like with AC's possible reappearance, there is another chapter that will lead to a reappearance of Hal: 'Green Lantern' will be coming soon.

That line about the secret was a bit confusing for some folks, but yes, it does refer to the Superman Secret. My Lois and Clark are a little less revealing about their secret than the Smallville Lois and Clark, haha, no one that doesn't already know (with the exception of new members of the Justice League like Bruce, Diana, and Hal) won't know here. For the most part anyways. Just seems a little more sensible that way.

To be totally honest, I'm not the biggest fan of the Chloe/Oliver thing. I love Chloe and all, but I have a feeling she's not going to be around much longer on the show. She is only billed for a couple more episodes, and after the talk she had with Oliver at the end of 'Collateral', can she leave again and it be ok? I'm thinking that Season 10 is going to have more than it's usual share of character deaths...

But on the story's note, you've been around long enough to know that it wasn't my intention to have them end up together. I just kind of got swept up in the winds of fandom, haha, but since it's really a background story anyways, it doesn't deter too many plans.

You hit the nail on the head with Lex and Lana (and of course Lex's perspective of Lois and Clark). Even during Season 1, I kind of caught vibes between Lex and Lana. I always assumed it would be the breaking point between Lex and Clark, and sure enough, it was. I have a few chapters left in the bag where we see the guy in their younger days, and Lex will have some more to say and think on Clois, haha.

I too was disappointed in Chloe's stance on Clana during Season 8. I thought she would step up and say something, and there is a small part of me that has not forgiven her for that. As for Henry Cavill, he certainly looks the part of Superman, but can he pull off Clark Kent? That's my big concern. No, Tom Welling doesn't look the part of Clark Kent either, but supposedly we're about to see him transform into Clark Kent, so I'm reserving judgement until then, haha.

We will see more Jealous Clark, and Perry White has a chapter called 'Chief' coming up, haha. I kind of forgot to add in that bit about Connor being half Lex as well, but there will be a chapter where that comes up called 'Superboy'. I'm pretty sure that Lois and Clark can find anything to argue about, haha.

You've seriously got to stop hacking my computer and reading my notes, haha. There will be a post-funeral scene between Lois and Clark, haha.

I think everyone fell in love with Lucy the moment she called Lana a bitch, haha, if you'll pardon my language, haha. And yeah, the General had to throw poor Clark a bone. I like to think that the General softened up on Clark once he gave him a granddaughter, haha. I could see that whole scenario going down between the girls on the shopping trip, with Jo'an pouting and then seeing some camo pants and getting excited, haha.

Jo'an and Martha wil get their time together, I promise, haha. I have 'Grandma' and 'Grandpa' chapters ready for Martha and the General respectively! haha. I think this was my longest reply ever to a series of reviews! haha, it's almost as long as the story itself! Enjoy!

_**A,sky**_ - Aww, haha, I'm glad that you liked it! I admit, the interactions between Clois prior to him coming back did not make me happy, haha, but it was very understandable. That scene at the hospital was beyond perfect, and of course, I did the happy dance when Lionel returned, haha.

_**AmberWaves**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV. I also don't own Whitesnake, 'Here I Go Again', or the ideas presented in the 'Here I Go Again' music video.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #56, Anniversary

**Author's Note: **I know that I said it would be J'onn J'onzz or Wonder Woman next, but after the Ultraman chapter, I thought everyone deserved a happy and lovey-dovey Clois chapter, haha. Hope you guys like it!

**

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**

"Oh...Smallville."

She shivered at the wet sensation on her neck. '_This man is going to drive me wild_...'

Lois kept her eyes closed, she was coming out of the most amazing dream.

_Clark had somehow worked his usually tame and short hair into long, frizzy blonde hair. Wearing a pain of tight leather pants and a tank top that showed off every ripple of muscle, he took her breath away with his short sleeve leather jacket. She was dancing on the hood of an old Jaguar. He had a tall microphone stand and was belting out her favorite song. Lois was melting at the mere sight._

_"And I'm going to hold on...for the rest of my days! Cause I know what it means...to walk along the lonely street of dreams!"_

_She danced along passionately. Hip swaying, arms flailing. When Clark looked back with a smile, she gave him a fierce look and a small roar._

Hairs tickled her neck and he muzzled deeper into her neck. Lois purred with satisfaction, she imagined Clark's long, frizzy hair clashing against her dark brunette locks. "Smallville, you better not be trying to seduce your way out of making me breakfast."

Air blew against her shoulder and she assumed that he was laughing, but she was still caught up in the memory of her dream.

_"Here I go...again on my own! Going down the only road I've ever known! Like a drifter...I was born to walk alone!"_

_Lois admired his butt in those skin-tight pants, the way he shook it back and worth, 'Mmmmmm, I'm going to rock that rockstar's world when as soon as I get the chance, preferably in the back seat of this car as soon as he is done with this song.'_

_"And I've made up my mind...I ain't wasting no more-"_

"Shelby! Get off the bed!"

Lois' eyes shot open. In the doorway, she saw Clark standing with a tray. He appeared to be planning on breakfast in bed. She slowly turned her head to see Shelby laying next to her, she could swear that the mutt was smiling at her. "Get the hell out of the bed!"

He popped off the bed and made his way to his own little bed under the window. '_I hate how he smiles like that..._' she thought with a fury.

She turned back to see Clark struggling to hold up the tray. An eyebrow quirked, she tried to find the source of his struggles. That's when she noticed he was turning red from trying not to laugh. "Let that out, and you're not getting special anniversary..." she eyed Shelby, who was watching intently, "...stuff."

"No Stiletto?"

"No Stiletto."

Clark swallowed and composed himself, bringing Lois the tray and giving her a peck on the lips. "That's my boy."

He smiled warmly, sitting on the edge of the bed and watching her devour her bacon. "You might want to chew, Lois."

She flashed him a glare. "'atch it, Small-ill," she mumbled with a mouthful of eggs.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, "Finish eating, I have to go take care of something."

Lois eyed him, '_What does he have up his sleeve this time?_' She choose not to ask though, simply giving him a nod. Clark gave her another quick kiss on the forehead and sped out of the room. Lois continued eating her eggs and let out a moan, '_I'm gunna thank his momma for his cooking skills..._'

Waddling back up the driveway after dinner later that night, Lois let out a content moan.

"Italian food in Italy. I'm so glad I married a superhero that can fly."

Clark chuckled, wrapping his arms around her from behind. "It wasn't because of my charming personality?"

"Nope."

"Not because of my dashing looks?"

Lois closed her eyes and shook her head, a small smirk forming. "Nope."

He gave her a tantalizing kiss on her neck. Luckily Clark was holding her, Lois' knees felt a little weak. "What about my prestigious career?"

_Snort._

Clark spun her around, giving her an intense gaze but keeping his small smile. "I think I know why..."

Lois smirked and quirked an eyebrow, "Do you now?"

"I think I have an idea," he smiled.

She made to head towards the house, but he grabbed her hand. She looked back and looked at him curiously, he made a slight nod towards the barn. A smile erupted onto her face, '_So this is his big surprise, huh?_' she thought as they walked hand-in-hand towards their destination.

As she stepped into the barn, the first thing she noticed was the cracking under her feet. The next thing she knew, the lights flashed on and the old disco ball was shining. '_Just like the night he first told me that he loved me..._' she thought, and then she noticed that the cracking sound was coming from all the rose petals covering the barn floor. '_Just like the night he asked me to marry him_,' she thought, heart nearly beating out of her chest.

She could barely hear the song playing over her other heart beat. She looked around for Clark, he had disappeared, though she suspected he sped away to turn on the lights and the music. Before she knew it, Clark wrapped his arms around her from behind, her hands coming to rest on his arms.

"I was thinking it was because of my old fashion romantic sensibilities..." he whispered into her ear.

Lois was still speechless, but found her voice after a few moments. "I was going to stay Buns of Steel but...oh boy."

To call the grin on Clark Kent's face "wide", would be a lot like saying that Lois Lane's knees were "weak". Understatements all around. Clark spun her around gently, causing her to giggle as her heels tacked across the floor, but she was silenced by his intense gaze.

"Everything ok, Smallville?"

He flashed her his famous Kent smile and nodded, taking her into his arms and swaying with the music.

"Lois, you've always been there to push me to greater heights. And I don't think I would be the man I am today without you," he said. Lois' blush was all the more noticeable in the glimmering light of the disco ball. "I might be Superman, and I might be a hero, but you have always been my hero Lois. You've always been the first one to run head first into a situation that needed a hero. You've always been my Superwoman."

"Oh..." she gasped. Her bottom lip quivering, she had never wanted to devour him so badly.

"Today is our wedding anniversary. And I love you even more now than I did then, if that's even possible," he laughed. She looked away nervously but grinned like a fool. "But you want to know something? As special as our wedding day was, you make every day just as special because every day with you is the best day of my life. Every day, I fall more in love with you than the day before."

She almost fell down. Luckily, Clark was there to keep her steady.

"Smallville...somedays, I really want to kill you."

Clark smiled, "I hate to steal your line...but that's hardly a news flash. How's tonight looking?"

She bit her lip and sized him up with a smile, "Tonight? Tonight...is one of those days where you're gunna get sooooooo lucky."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did that make up for it? haha. I wanted to make something just oh so fluffy, fun, and sappy to get the roughness that was 'Ultraman' off of our minds. I kind of felt like I needed to write something that showed he was once, at the very least, a decent man while showing how he could become the kind of man he became and how he could sleep with his step-sister and basically look at women as disposable objects. I'm glad you guys still liked it.

As for the Anniversary, I hope it fits the bill as fluffy, fun, and sappy? haha. I kind of feel like it was a cop out to do the L-Word/Proposal combo, but at the same time, I felt like it might have brought us all back to two of our favorite moments in Clois history.

Anways, tell me what you though! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Wonder Woman _or_ J'onn J'onzz_, leaning towards _J'onn_ though.


	57. J'onn

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, you are very welcome. I too love the Shelbster, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Haha, I'm glad it was such a hit for Clark to be dressed up like David Coverdale, haha. I thought it might be too much of a stretch and too far out of our usual Smallville ways, so that's great to hear, haha. I don't think she needs to apologize either, haha, but it got the laugh! haha. As for the Scrabble joke, haha, I think that Lois would gladly pull out little moments like that for her zingers, haha.

And yes, it is a big deal to carve the Turkey, if you don't mind my asking, where do you live that you don't celebrate Thanksgiving? I just realized I've never considered that non-North Americans might not celebrate Thanksgiving despite the fact it's obviously a North American holiday.

You're going to have to toss up all the Jo'an credit to mygyps17, thats where the character began and if you haven't read 'You Make My Daddy Sick', I am highly recommending it. Especially if you want to enjoy some of those Elmer Fudd jokes completely, haha. Like I was telling cathy03, I'm pretty sure that Lex had an eye for Lana long before Season 4, so it's not _that _selfish. Bride was hard for all Clois fans, but we got where we needed to go, so it's just a bump in the road, haha. And yes, I'm not particularly fond of any non-Clois Lois action, so you don't have to worry, Ultraman was a one time deal.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k **_- Personally? I laughed pretty hard when I pictured Clark as Coverdale, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, you're too nice to me. I'm so glad that you liked the dream and of course a long overdue Shelby appearance. And yes, I've taken the recent requests to see more...implications of physical love, haha, between Lois and Clark as my free pass, haha. I'm glad that you liked my little speech and scene because I was really nervous about writing a worthy anniversary surprise, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, you caught me with Pete! And yes, he is a saint, he's Superman! haha. Yeah, I try and look at him that way too, but I have to admit, I see Tom Welling's face as Clark Luthor, and I still have a hard time separating the two. I don't mind the length, haha, I was just saying. It means a lot to me that you would take the time and comment on each and every one. Haha, and yes, I suppose we are in sync.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm beyond ecstatic that Michael Rosenbaum is coming back! I've never been so happy about Smallville news. Though I have to admit, Lucas Grabeel was killer as young Lex, I couldn't get enough of him. That whole episode was pretty great I thought, and I'm so anxious to see what the ending was all about, and I'm also very excited that Tess might have a larger role in the coming episodes alongside Lex.

I am also very excited to see Tom Welling as mild-mannered Clark Kent, because I have total faith that he can be Superman (not that I'm expecting to him to show up as Superman anytime soon minus the Finale, just for my own kicks), so this will be great!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #57, J'onn J'onzz

**Author's Note:** This one takes place shortly after the infamous 'Pilot' episode.

**

* * *

**

'_This boy is an idiot_,' thought the little girl furiously.

She watched a young Clark Kent try to build a sandcastle, but rolled her eyes every time he messed up when he tried to build a second story. She promptly stomped around him and grabbed the bucket out of his hand, causing Clark to look up in shock.

'_If he can't do it himself, I'll build my own and show him how it's done_,' she thought as she stomped away.

Clark looked over his shoulder, '_Why did that mean girl just take my bucket?_'

He looked back to see her building her own sandcastle. He walked over to her to ask for his bucket back, but she quickly stood up and brushed past him without a word. Normally, he would consider this behavior weird, but he was too busy picking up his bucket to think about it. On his way back to his own sandcastle, she brushed by him on her way back to hers. He almost missed that she had his shovel in her hand.

"Why does she keep taking my stuff?" he muttered as he dropped his bucket and walked back her way.

The Kent Family had come to Metropolis so that they could pick up some supplies for the newest addition. Clark wasn't quite suited for shopping, he liked to grab things off shelves and well, Clark didn't quite know his own strength yet. That left the Kents in the awkward position of hiding crushed toys and mangled kitchen supplies behind the other boxes on the shelf, so Jonathan volunteered to take Clark to Centennial Park to play.

Clark was very good with other children, and so far he seemed to be quite interested in the little girl he was playing with.

"It seems unusual that your son would keep playing with a girl who steals his toys."

Jonathan turned see a man standing besides the bench, "That's the thing about Kent men, we like a girl that'll drive us crazy."

He quickly glanced around to make sure that his wife wasn't back yet. J'onn simply smiled at Mr. Kent's statement.

"May I?" he asked, gesturing to the seat beside him.

"Of course," said Jonathan.

"My name is J'onn. J'onn J'onzz," the man said, extending his hand.

Jonathan shook his hand, "Jonathan Kent."

Now, Jonathan didn't know this, but J'onn already knew exactly who the man was. The day that Clark's ship had crashed to Earth, J'onn had rushed to see who had come with the ship and where it had come from. He knew instantly by it's design that it was Kryptonian. He had scanned the area to see if he could find who inhabited it when he saw the Kents taking in the small boy. He quickly read some of the ship's engravings and knew the boy must be Kal-El, the son of Jor-El and Lara from Krypton, though he was unsure as to why the boy was here without them.

His detective work had revealed the truth about Krypton. It was gone.

The duo watched as Clark tried to bargain with the little girl, offering to give her his lunchbox of snacks in exchange for his shovel. "I has chocolate?"

The little girl dropped the shovel and Clark quickly picked it up, handing her his lunchbox. Jonathan frowned as he watched Clark snicker, they had just bought that lunchbox today and he knew that there was nothing inside of it. Clark quickly shuffled over to his sandcastle. The little girl opened the lunchbox with a greedy grin, but when she realized it only contained a couple "cool rocks" Clark had picked up, she picked up her favorite toy tool.

The two watched as the little girl approached Clark, a small plastic hammer in her hand. J'onn observed that Jonathan was simply smiling.

"Mr. Kent..." Jonathan looked at him, "...the hammer?"

Jonathan looked at J'onn oddly, not yet realizing his meaning. "Oh, of course, Clark! Watch out for the...hammer."

Clark looked up and then back at the little girl, she was now hiding the hammer behind her back and trying to look innocent. Clark simply shrugged and went back to playing in the sand. Jonathan grinned as he watched the little girl walk over and help him with his sand castle.

"I'm glad that you are Clark's father, Mr. Kent," said J'onn.

Jonathan furrowed his brow and smiled, "Not that I'm complaining, but do you mind if I ask why that is?"

"It takes a very...special man...to look after someone as special as Clark."

"And what makes you think that Clark is so special?"

J'onn smiled at him. "Because I knew Clark's father. I won't insult you by calling him his _real_ father, but I knew his _biological_ father."

Jonathan let out an uneasy laugh. "I think you might have us confused with somebody else."

"Maybe so," J'onn smiled. "Little boys in crashing spaceships are a frequent occurrence, aren't they?"

Mr. Kent froze in place, "How do you..."

"I'm a friend, Mr. Kent. Do not worry, I only want to make sure that Clark will be looked after."

Jonathan was in shock. He didn't know what to say.

"I am happy to see that you will be Clark's father because I will not always be around to protect him."

"Protect him?"

J'onn nodded, "The world is a dark place, Mr. Kent, and Clark has the potential to be a hero. I can protect him from some of that darkness, but I needed to know that you will be a force for good in his life. I know now that you will help him become that hero."

"How can I..."

"He will become strong on his own, he will be able to fight his own battles. All you need to do is guide him, Mr. Kent."

Jonathan nodded. "Are you like Clark? Are you from...wherever he is from?"

"No. I am from the planet Mars. But I hope that Clark and I will be good friends some day."

Mr. Kent looked just thrown about, "Where is Clark from? What was that world like? So many questions, I don't know where to start..."

J'onn placed a hand on Jonathan's shoulder, "That will all be learned in good time. For now, let him be a boy. That is all he needs right now."

Jonathan looked down, and J'onn let out a sigh. He had never liked doing this part. He went inside of Jonathan's mind and wiped out his last few memories to ensure that Clark would be raised as a normal boy from a normal family. J'onn hoped this would instill the right ideals in the boy. J'onn then stood and cast one last look over the boy, allowing a small smile to form on his face before leaving the park.

After a few moments, Jonathan looked up to see the little girl standing on Clark's back as she tried to get onto the swing. He let out a laugh, this little girl seemingly had his son wrapped around her finger. That's when he heard a screech from behind, "Lois!"

He looked over to see a woman pulling up the little girl off Clark. When he got there, the woman sputtered "I'm so sorry! She likes to pick on boys."

Jonathan laughed as he looked at his son's expression, "I don't think Clark minds it as much as you might think."

Clark smiled a goofy smile at his father, "She's bossy."

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that for a Baby Clois story? haha. I didn't want to make it so that a three or four year old Clark was fawning after Lois, but I just couldn't pass up that late line, haha. And I've always liked the storyline that saw J'onn observing Clark from a young age, seeing the potential for a hero in him and even going as far as to transform into one of Clark's teachers to get to know him. So this is what I came up with for a young Clois story.

I'm sure some of you were worried about Jonathan meeting J'onn, as well as the conversation they had, but you can see that J'onn made sure to leave things the way they ought to be and Jonathan will continue to raise Clark without knowing his true origins.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I think we'll go with '_Bizarro'_, just because '_Wonder Woman_' needs a few more edits.


	58. Bizarro

**Review Comments:**

**_NonOmnisMoriar _**- Oh, that's awesome. I've always wanted to visit the Netherlands. Thanksgiving is a great tradition and all, but you shouldn't have to have some holiday to spend time with the family, haha. Sometimes we forget that over here in America.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I'm not sure she would have had the restraint to, you know, not kill Lana. Haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, yup.

_**sunset**_ - I think Lois would hold that over her for all eternity, haha. I can't imagine how bad she'd be about that, haha. I was going for a semi-surprise even though we all know where it was going, haha, so it seems like a no-thoughts-for-Clark chapter.

Haha, I will see what I can do. The thing about the General is that you can't forget that guy, haha, and they've gotta forget all their interactions with baby Lois and her parents before they meet again for the second time. But I'll see if I can't figure something out, haha, it was fun and I can just imagine the kind of stories that Baby Clois could bring. The reason for the lack of talking, I originally had no speaking because I was literally thinking "Baby", but Clark was at least three years old when he came to Earth, right? So I had to do some last minute edits, haha.

_**Andi**_ - Thanks!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Every likes Jonathan, haha.

_**meg**_ - Haha, I'll see what I can whip up, much more and it'll be hard for Clark to forget her in time.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - If I recall correctly, J'onn was on Earth for quite some time before Clark came along. Also, as far as I know, J'onn didn't actually know Jor-El like he supposedly does on Smallville, so I tried to link together those two notions.

I'm glad you liked their interactions! haha.

_**mpj891**_ -Thanks!

_**Ina100years**_ - Can't let her get too out of character just because she's still in diapers, hahaha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I'm working out the kinks on the Clark Luthor chapter, but I suspect it'll be up sooner than later. I'm glad that you liked the speech that Clark gave, I was pretty nervous about it, haha. I'm more of a banter guy and less of a romantic speech guy, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Oh yeah, there will be plenty of Jimmy/Lucy up ahead, haha. I actually really liked Superman Returns, weird huh? haha.

_**nameunknown**_ - Thanks! I'd love to read them!

_**alexindigo**_ - Yep, that was Ella. I didn't want there to be too much talking or anything because obviously Clark and Jonathan don't remember Lois when they meet her the next time around. That's why there wasn't any cameos for the General in this one. I hope you have a good flight!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bizzaro/Lana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #58, Bizarro

**Author's Note:** Only thing you really need to know is that Bizarro is back, and he is coming to see Clark. Oh, and Bizarro loves Lana, haha.

**

* * *

**

Clark was stacking some bails of hay when he heard a crash outside. Speeding outside, he saw...himself. Wearing purple.

"Clark Kent. I'm here to kill you."

He quickly realized he was standing toe-to-toe with his doppelganger, the Zoner that had copied his DNA. Clark immediately got into a fighting stance, this particular foe was not one to take lightly. He was ready to charge when the Zoner spoke again.

"Lana Lang shall be mine."

This caused Clark's brow to furrow. "Wait, you want to kill me so...you can be with Lana?"

"Exactly."

Clark relaxed noticeably, causing the Zoner to frown. "But, I'm with...I'm with Lois now."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, I'm not with...I'm with Lois, you remember Lois right? Lois Lane?" The Zoner nodded. "Yeah, so...yeah."

This caused the Zoner to frown even more, he began to shake his head. Clark just stood their uncomfortably while the Zoner processed this. After a while of this, Clark did the only thing he could think to do. He let the Zoner know that he didn't really care.

"So, as long as that's like, cool with Lana, that's fine with me."

Now the Zoner relaxed. "So you...you don't want to be with Lana? Like...at all?"

"Nope," Clark shrugged.

"Oh...well...that's great. That's uh, wow, I wasn't really expecting this."

Clark nodded, "Yeah, I mean, that whole thing kind of blew up not too long after you last came through town. Minus about five weeks of stupidity on my part about a year later after my friend got married, but yeah, we've been over for a long time now. Years."

"So you're, you're just with Lois, huh? Totally happy?"

"Yeah, we're married now. She's expecting our first kid in a couple months."

The Zoner smiled, "That's great, man. Congratulations."

"Thanks, I'm really excited about it."

"Soooo, are you and Lana still friends though? Still hang out?"

"Not really. No."

The Zoner nodded, kind of trying to figure out what he should do. Clark wasn't actually a threat anymore for Lana This kind of was the opposite of what he thought was going to happen today, kind of left his day open to do whatever he wanted. "Know where she is?"

"Paris, I think. Last I heard, she was around that area."

"Ok, well, I guess I...I better be going then." The Zoner shuffled his feet, embarrassed about storming into Smallville now.

Clark smiled, "Yeah, I mean, as long as you agree not to hurt anyone or anything, we should grab a beer sometime."

"That'd be great, I don't know many people on Earth. Maybe we can do a double date or something? Bring along Lana and Lois?"

Clark winced, "I think that might be kind of weird, what with us, you know, looking exactly the same? They don't really get along. She would probably see Lana kiss you thinking it's me and kill you. Or the other way around. Just probably lots of kissing and killing. "

The Zoner nodded, "Yeah, it'll have to be like a bros night out or something."

"Yeah, that wouldn't be too bad. Catch a Sharks game maybe?"

They stood there awkwardly for a while, but the Zoner finally waved a hand at Clark, "Alright...well, uh...I'll catch you later, Clark."

"You too,...I don't really know what to call you..."

The Zoner grimaced and nodded. The two shared another awkward silence, but Bizarro took off into the skies as Lois walked out. "Who was that?"

"An old friend...he's kind of bizarre."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Clark, you're from another planet, all your little friends are Bizarro. Come on, dinner is ready."

"Please don't let it be pickles and Jet-Puffed marshmallow cream again..." he grimaced as he walked towards the house. He started to hang his head at the lack of a burning smell as he got closer, it told him that it was pickles and marshmallow cream, "Man, I hate pregnancy food."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Alright, alright, that one was kind of silly and short, but it was funny, wasn't it? haha. It just kind of came to me the other night, and I thought it was just too amusing to pass up on. It's really probably because I'm writing a Mxy chapter that connects the dots between the Smallville Mxy and the comics Mxy, since that's the Mxy the chapter is about, and I thought I would say that Bizarro becomes the way we know him in the comics because that explosion in 'Persona' kind of rattled his brain? haha. But trying to write Bizarro speak is **HARD**, so I gave up and wrote this, hahaha.

I hope no one takes this one too seriously, haha, it's just a goofy little one that I thought up in the moment and couldn't pass on. And I hope no one gets upset about Lana-bashing because of the "five weeks of stupidity", referring to the five episodes that Lana appeared in during Season 8. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought about Bizarro's big return to Smallville, haha.

**Next Up:** _Smallville High._


	59. Smallville High

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Hahaha, yeah. 'Bizarro' was just one of those ones that I couldn't pass up writing, we'll see if I can swing a sequel, haha.

**_MegasarusRex101_** - Haha, thanks!

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - Haha, I'm sorry about the coughing!

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - Afraid of flying, eh? My sister used to have that problem as well, so I see the trouble there. If I ever make my way to the Netherlands, I'll be sure to do that! haha.

_**Spoons There Are**_ - Haha, now that I think about it, this one was probably inspired by the final scene of Scott Pilgram vs. the World, haha. I hadn't thought about it until I read you comment, but now that I have, I can just see the potential, haha.

**_Lara-Kent_** - Now that you mention it, there's plenty of comedy for the idea that Lois or Lana might get greedy and want _two_ Clarks, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - They might just have to run into each other unexpectedly, haha. And yep, it's Jo'an, I haven't elaborated on the second child yet, haha. Happy V-Day to you too!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #59, Smallville High

**Author's Note:** Takes place after 'Tomb' where Clark had to make some tough choices, and hopes he'll continue to make the right ones.

* * *

Lois felt like she'd looked down every hallway in the school, but when she finally saw him, it seemed all too obvious. Clark was standing in front of the trophy case where his father's picture glowed with the last remnants of the sunset shining through the window.

She slowed her pace. She had come to yell, she had come to scream, but seeing him now, she didn't want to say a word.

'_If I'm this broken up about it, I can't imagine what kind of hell Clark is going through right now._'

He knew she was standing next to him. He could hear her a mile away. Those clunky boots she liked to wear so much were hardly what one would advise to someone trying to be stealthy. Not that she cared, she was the first one to barge in guns blazing. It brought a smile to his face, imagining her dressed up like a cowboy looking to shoot up an old time salon. To be honest, he wouldn't put it past her.

Lois watched on, she figured he was remembering some nice moment that he had with his father or something.

"I know I've been kind of AWOL on you lately..." she started.

"It's ok, Lois."

She turned to him full on, "If it's so ok, why are you sneaking into your old high school in the middle of the night?"

"It's not that late."

"It's about a year too late, Smallville. You graduated, remember? I was there. You looked..."

Clark couldn't help the small smile, "Would it kill you say that I looked nice?"

"You looked like a dork."

He let out a laugh, causing her to break out into a grin and punch him on the arm. "Come on, didn't you get enough of this place the last four years?"

"I just like to come by and see...I wish that I could be _him_ sometimes. I need to be. I wish...I wish I could be that man."

Lois looked at him with a confused face, "But you aren't him. You're Clark Kent."

"Sometimes I need to be more like Jonathan Kent."

She didn't really know what to say. She wanted to tell him that he didn't need to be more like Jonathan Kent, but that sounded too mean towards the man she considered a father to her. "I think you're pretty damn good just the way that you are, Smallville."

He gave her a sideways look with just the slightest ghost of a smirk forming, "I mean besides the plaid, of course."

Clark let out another small laugh, "Of course."

They shared a few moments of silence, but it wasn't all the awkward or tense. It was almost...calm. Lois had never been one for silence, but she kind of liked these moments with him. She knew that he wasn't secretly judging her or waiting for something from her, he was just...there.

"He always knew the right thing to say. The right thing to do."

She looked up at him, "You're pretty good at that too, you know."

"There are times when I don't know what do. How to fix something, or make something right. I was always able to go to him, and he almost always had the right answer. Sometimes, I just worry that something is going to come along that I can't fix on my own," he told her.

"Everything is going to be just fine," she told him.

He let his head hang, "But what if-"

She grabbed his head and stared directly into his eyes. Clark had to admit, he was surprised by her grip, but it had nothing on her stare.

"Everything is going to be fine, Smallville. I promise."

"How do you know?"

Lois never took her hands off his face. "Because I'm looking into your eyes right now, and I know in my gut that it will be. We'll get through this. Together. I know for a fact that there ain't a damn thing that's going to stop Lois and Clark. Got it?"

He smiled. And then she smiled. Neither one knew how long they stood there like that, locked in an intense gaze, and neither of them cared. This was their moment, and everyone else could go to hell as far as they were concerned. They had each other, that's all they needed. For a few moments there, he thought she might kiss him if he moved. But there was also a really good chance she might kill him if he broke her gaze.

"Alright, well, you look like you're all better. Might we get out of Cornfield High and have some fun?" she said as she walked away with a faint smirk.

Clark grinned and called out, "I guess that depends on what you have in mind."

She spun around to smirk fully at him as she walked backwards, "I guess you'll have to come and find out, won't you?"

He let her get a bit of a head start. "I guess I will," he whispered before taking off after her.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? Originally this was going to lead into another scene, but then I realized that Jonathan Kent died during Season 5 and not Season 6 like I was thinking, so Date Night with the Wholesome Olsen and his favorite gal-pal is going to have to stand on it's own, haha.

I wanted to do this scene with just enough seriousness and just enough humor that it would fit in with Season 5-ish Clois. After Papa-K's death, the two seemed to become closer and closer, so I wanted to hint towards something but keep it platonic enough to get away with three very long years before we get to see them at least admit their feelings for one another. That serious part hopefully mirrors the talk they had in the Phantom Zone during 'Bloodline.'

Well, Happy Valentines Day everyone! I hope it works out for everyone! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought first though! haha.

**Next Up:** _Wonder Woman._


	60. Wonder Woman

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Thanks! Being the post-funeral speech, it wasn't exactly the easiest idea to add humor to, hahaha.

**_clarkfan325_** - Thanks!

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - I can't too much credit for the line, haha, the line was in 'Bloodline' as "Listen to me. No one's gonna mess with Lois and Clark, all right?". In my fake world, Clark was remembering when Lois told him that years ago when he told her that line in the Phantom Zone, haha.

**_cathy03_** - The Swiss Army Knife of Superheroes, haha, my favorite Martian Manhunter nickname to date! haha. I kind of pictured Clark that way too, and I think that there is a whole other series that could be written where Bizarro and Clark are friends, haha. They'd be like the Odd Couple! I really wanted to write Bizarro in his comic version with the backwards speech and craziness, but I was pulling my hair out three or four lines in, haha. His dialogue is insanity!

I really wish Lois would have had a bigger role early on as well, especially in Clark's life. Wasn't there some deal in place about trying to limit her role because of the Superman Returns film and they didn't want there to be any confusion? I guess I understand that, but I wish they had more Clois early on, even if it was that hint-y kind of thing. But hey, that's what FanFiction is for, right? haha. We will have youngish Clois!

_**Mpj891**_ - Thanks! I know it's probably unrealistic to have a three year old Clark have the devious ways to trip up young Lois, but can anyone really complain about that picture in your head? hahaha. I just thought it was the cutest little idea, it inspired the whole chapter!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Hints of Bruce/Diana, mentions of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #60, Wonder Woman

**Author's Note: **Post 'Batman' but obviously before 'Diana', and for those of you wondering (since I cast Armie Hammer as my young Bruce Wayne), I think I would go with the lovely Sarah Lancaster from my other favorite show, 'Chuck'. She looks _just like_ Lynda Carter, I swear.

**

* * *

**"Wow."

Diana turned to see a man in a suit stepping over rubble towards her. He wasn't looking at her though, he was looking around the abandoned theatre she had been using as a base camp since she arrived in Washington, DC just a few weeks ago.

"Who are you?" she asked.

He ignored her. "I have not been in here in years...do you see how the...the architecture in here, it's brilliant." He turned to look at her. "They just don't make them like this anymore. Do you know the history of this place?"

She narrowed her eyes and gave him a glare, he was oddly unaffected. "This used to be a palace. It was amazing."

Something caught his eye and he stopped where he was standing.

"Are you ok?" she ventured.

He seemed to shake some cobwebs from his head, "Yeah, I'm fine. I just have a thing about...bats."

She was starting to think he was a crazy homeless man that stole someone's dry cleaning or something. This guy was far from normal.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

He smiled at her charmingly and extended his hand, "Bruce. Bruce Wayne."

"And how can I help you, Mr. Wayne?"

"Uh, well, that's really going to depend on how our conversation goes, I guess."

Diana frowned, she wasn't sure what he was talking about. "What do you mean it depends on how our conversation goes?"

"Well, if we're going to be friends, there's a lot you can help me with. Me and my friends, I mean. If not, well, we're going to have problems."

"What kind of problems?"

Bruce smiled at her again, why did he keep smiling like that. "The kind of problems that lead to physical violence."

She let out a cold laugh, "I think you're barking up the wrong tree."

"Maybe. You do look different without your tiara, but I'm pretty good with faces."

"What do you want?"

"To be your friend."

"And what exactly does that mean in your book? And why would I want to be your friend?"

Bruce wiped off a part of a bench and sat down. "Well, for starters, you're pretty sloppy."

"Excuse-"

"Four men in the hospital, one in critical condition? That's sloppy."

She glared. "They were criminals."

"Doesn't make it okay, Diana."

"How do you know my name?"

"I know a lot of things about you...Princess."

A glimmer of fear ran through her face, but she stood tall. "What do you want from me?"

"I have a group of friends, real hero types. We want to protect the world. We call ourselves the Justice League, I know, corny, right?"

She furrowed her brow, but made no indication that she wanted him to stop.

"We believe that you would be a pretty good fit for what we have established. But you have to follow some rules."

"What kind of rules?"

"The kind of rules that forbid you from putting petty thieves into hospital beds. The kind of rules that say we fight along side the law, but not taking into our own hands. We have a code of ethics, we stand for something more. We want you to be on that team."

Diana didn't know how to take all of this in. This Bruce character wanted her to join his sideshow freedom fighter club.

"We've got to work on your outfit too, and your alter-ego."

"Whats wrong with my outfit?"

"Nothing. But you don't wear a mask, so you have to let the clothes do the hiding."

She glared, "What makes you think you know so much about this?"

"I have a friend who doesn't wear a mask either. Pretty risky, but it's all about who you dress up as in your _normal_ life that makes it work."

Diana pondered it for a few moments, not sure whether to trust him. "Well...what did you have in mind?"

Bruce smiled a toothy grin her way that made her feel all matter of uneasy. The grin he flashed her when she came out of the dressing room in her new off-the-clock look, which consisted of glass and an outfit that seemed better suited for a librarian if you asked her.

"You can't be serious."

He gave her a funny look, "What?"

"I look like a complete idiot."

"You look like the opposite of what you look like when you are in costume. That's the idea, Princess."

She shot him a glare, "Stop calling me Princess, Rich Boy."

"I thought you were staring at my butt earlier..." he laughed, she narrowed her eyes, "...I see you noticed the wallet."

Diana had to bite back a laugh. "Who came up with this whole scheme of misdirection anyways?"

"Just a couple that I know. He's the superhero, she's the superwife."

This time she did let out a laugh, "They must be insane."

"Well, he does wear underwear on the outside of his suit. And she does spend most of the days trying to pick between kissing him and killing him."

She looked at him with the strangest look, "What? You have a lasso that makes people tell the truth. Hardly in the position to judge."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, what did you guys think? haha. I want something light and easy going, showing how Diana met Bruce (I always thought he ought to be the one to bring her into the Smallville Justice League for whatever reason, just as it seemed natural for Oliver to be the one who introduces Bruce to Clark because they do business together between Queen Industries and Wayne Enterprises).

I'd like to write future chapters where the Rich-Boy/Princess dynamic keeps up, haha. Oh, and I thought I'd let you guys cast another vote: Since it's all but confirmed that Alexander Luthor is actually going to be Smallville's Superboy, for the 'Superboy' chapter, should I do like I did for 'Connor Kent' and have that backstory for the character? Or would you guys prefer for me to do a story about Alexander Luthor as Superboy instead?

Anyways, shoot me a review and tell me what you thought!

**Next Up:** _The Torch._


	61. The Torch

Review Comments:

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, the Torch

**Author's Note: **Takes place somewhere during Season 4, probably towards the end instead of the beginning.

**

* * *

**"Hey Lois, didn't you have a movie night with Clark last week?"

She looked up from her magazine. Chloe had dragged her to the Torch this week because she had some deadline or something. "Yeah, why?"

"Any chance that you know what his favorite movie is?"

"Oh, yeah, it's that Richard Donner movie, uh, what was it's name again?" Chloe turned and gave her an '_no idea_' look. "You know? It has that guy, and the girl, and the guy with the wig? There were like four movies. But he only likes the first two, those were the Donner ones."

Lois stood up and walked over, "Why? What are you up to?"

"I'm doing an online biography for all the Torch reporters for the new Torch website. Lana whipped up some questions for it."

"Oh, well, you got this one wrong."

Chloe frowned, "Which one?"

"The burger one. Clark likes his with no pickles, extra onions, ketchup, and a little bit of mustard."

The Blonde looked at Lois with wide eyes, "What? I only know because I give him my onions and he gives me his pickles."

Chloe had to bite back a snort. The conversation she was having reminded her of a conversation she had with Clark earlier that day.

_"What's wrong?"_

_She looked up to see Clark Kent standing behind her, "Oh, I'm just trying to remember what Lois' favorite sport is."_

_"Baseball."_

_She gave him a surprised glance, but typed it down anyways. "What are you doing anyways?"_

_"I'm doing her biography for the Torch site."_

_Clark smirked, "She doesn't even go to school here, Chloe."_

_"Yeah, but the Torch is light on reporters, so I figured I'd do past and present for the fun of it."_

_He gave her a shrug and read down the upcoming questions. "Her favorite activity is a Monster Truck rally."_

_"I know," she told him with an amused frown._

_"And she prefers nerds to jocks, for the perfect spouse question?" He frowned a bit. "Not that I understand why," he mumbled._

_At this point, Clark actually leaned over Chloe to type. "She had a cat named Elroy, but I think she's allergic. Oh, and she has her blackbelt."_

_Chloe wasn't quite sure to do, so she just kind of leaned back and let him take over. This was certainly getting interesting._

_"Whitesnake goes here...looooooves video games...won't admit it, but she does love journalism..."_

"Chloe! Chloe!"

Lois Lane suddenly was ringing in her ears. "Huh? What?"

Chloe looked to see Lois looking at her with a worried expression, "You kind of zoned out there for a bit..."

"Oh, right, sorry. I was just thinking about...things."

"Right, well, you need to change this bit right here."

She frowned and turned to look where Lois was pointing, "What Clark wants to be when he graduates? He told me to put 'Play for the Sharks' there, Lo."

"Well, I don't care what he said. We all know he's going to be a fireman or a cop or something, he's got that huge hero complex thing going on."

An amused smirk formed on Chloe's face, Lois was trying to hijack his bio just like Clark had hijacked hers earlier.

"And come on? Worst attribute? That boy couldn't dance to save his life, Chlo."

"You should have heard what he said about your spelling," mumbled Chloe.

"What?"

Chloe shook her head, cheeks puffed out. "Nothing. Just...nothing."

"Favorite cartoon character?" Lois snorted and typed, "Elmer Fudd."

_"Prized possession? Don't get me started on those ratty bunny slippers of hers, Chloe. They reek!"_

"The only question here is which color does he love more? Red or Blue?"

_"We should pink down just to mess with her," he laughed._

"Pets? Which sounds more fitting for that mutt: mangy or stinky? How about both?"

_"I almost feel bad about calling Lucy her sister, she's practically had to be a mother for her," he said in a surprisingly caring voice._

_Chloe couldn't help the smile from forming on her face. Looks like Lois and Clark were finally moving past the bickering stage._

"His favorite food is pot roast of course, but every knows the boy loves a hotdog."

_"Well, she's always stuffing her face with chocolate and strawberries, does that count?_

_Chloe snorted, 'And we're back to the bickering stage.'_

Lois laughed as she typed in her last bit, "It's funny how much I know about Smallville, you know?"

"You guys spend like every second of every day together, Lo. It was bound to happen sooner or later."

"What? I don't spend _that_ much-" She saw the expression on Chloe's face. "Oh, shut your face, Chlo."

Just then, Clark walked into the room. "What are you guys up to?"

"Just fixing your biography," quipped Lois with a devilish smirk on her face, eyebrows wagging.

Chloe would look back on that day as the day that they broke her computer. They fought over it to the point that they knocked it off the back of the desk and it shattered into about a million little pieces. Where was Clark's nifty super speed then? At the time, she was sure that they were wrestling _that_ close because they were trying to play off their desire to kiss one another as a desire to want to kill each other. But now? Chloe let out a snort.

She still thought that's why they were wrestling so closely.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Haha, what did you guys think?


	62. Halloween

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Spoiler for the week? You will see what Lois' idea of "fun" was, haha. There is an upcoming chapter that directly follows. Oh yeah, Diana is a physical match for even Clark, so Bruce is really speaking from a team perspective, hahaha. That's the rumor, I was surprised that I didn't see Alexander in tonight's episode, but I will say that I was ecstatic about the way Clark was wearing those glasses at the end. I got chills! Chills, I tell you!

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - Yvonne Strahvoski is one of my favorites! I wanted her to play Dinah Lance or Catwoman in the new Batman movie! It's always been my fanboy fantasy to see Yvonne, Erica Durance, and Summer Glau in the same scene! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I think my plan is for 'Superboy' to be about the Connor Kent I introduced in 'Connor', and do a chapter called 'Alexander' about that Superboy. And yes, I hear exactly what you're saying about Bats and Wonder Woman, I loved that scene where they were on a stakeout. I will definitely be writing about them in the future, haha, they're like the reverse of Lois of Clark. Bruce is all smooth and witty, Diana is like a fish out of water relationship-wise, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I wish we could have seen more Clois friendship early on and even more Jonathan/Lois father/daughter time. Yeah, I saw someone trying to say Armie Hammer would make a great Superman in the new Superman movie (pre-Henry Cavill's casting), and I found myself thinking that he'd be a great Bruce Wayne for some reason. I've only seen him in the Social Network, but he seemed like he would really fit the bill.

If you are itching for some Clois action, you're definitely going to like the next few chapters, haha.

_**sunset**_ - If he had a name, I didn't catch it. I do remember them saying he was made in a lab, so maybe he never got a name. I just went with 'the Zoner' to be safe because I honestly couldn't find something else to call him. I had a friend that was forced to eat pregnancy food with his wife when she was preggo, it was pretty hilarious, haha. That was the inspiration for that little tid-bit, haha. I think we'll see it a few more times, haha.

She was wearing kind of boring clothes I guess, haha. Being the Princess of an island full of beautiful Amazons, I don't think she's used to toning it down, haha, I think she's used to being an eye catcher. A double date, eh? You read my mind, haha.

The whole conversation was inspired by some of those moments like the Piggy-Bank conversation, and the one from 'Bloodline' where Clark reassures her that they'll be ok, moments like that. I'm glad that it was up to the mark for Valentines Day, I wouldn't to do something heartfelt for it.

Lois is the kind of person that barges into someone's life whether they like it or not, haha. Whether Clark intended on it happening, Lois quickly became really important to him. You can see that in episodes like 'Recruit' when she was in trouble and he was scared for her. Looking back, I think that 'Crossfire' was playing in the back of my head when I was writing that chapter, haha. I almost wrote something about the Pink Princess but didn't want to go too far, haha. I don't think that Chloe would have encouraged them at that point in time, so it was more to be annoying than to hint.

_**katlynne**_ - Thanks! I'm glad that they hit the spot! And yes, I love to write pre-romance Clois even though I love that they are together now.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I have this idea that Bruce is less broody when he's out of the suit, and even more so when he is around Diana, haha. There are really three different Bruce Waynes: Batman, Bruce Wayne, and Bruce. As Batman, he is super broody. As Bruce Wayne, he is an obnoxious playboy. And as Bruce, he is somewhere in between where he is serious at times and light hearted at times. A lot of his League interactions seem to indicate that to me anyways.

_**meg**_ - Thanks!

_**A,sky**_ - I almost wrote a chapter where Bizarro was hitting on Lois and she thought he was Clark but acting weird, haha. It just didn't seem as good as what I ended up with though, so I stuck with that one. I'm glad you liked High School, like I said before, I was nervous about making it up to snuff. I hope your week is going better! Hopefully this one will help out as well, I think you'll like it!

_**Mpj891**_ - Thanks!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I thought Alexander was going to become Lex as well, but in a way, I'm happy he isn't just because now I have no idea how Lex is going to return. Not knowing is kind of fun in a way, but honestly, I'm going to be checking Kryptonsite constantly, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I'm glad that it felt like it would fit in, those kind of comments make me feel great because I want the chapter to feel right, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, Halloween

**Author's Note:** Just to avoid any confusion, this does not take place during 'Perry', but it does take place shortly after.

**

* * *

**

"Luce, I'm not sure this is a good idea..."

She rolled her eyes and checked her costume in the mirror. "She's not going to find out."

"You don't realize how scary she is. She even scares Clark! And she loves Clark. Like, a lot. I spend half my day making sure that Perry doesn't catch them in the copy room! So if she scares Clark Kent, who she loves and spends most her time sucking face with, what's she going to do to me?"

"Jimmy. Calm down. Lois isn't going to find out!"

He looked at her nervously. "And if she does?"

Lucy let out a laugh. "Then I'll protect you from the big bad Lois," she told him in a baby-voice.

Jimmy fixed a glare on her. Well, the best glare that he could manage. "Very funny."

"Come on, Bowtie. We've got a party to go to!"

Clark stood near the punch bowl, keeping an eye out for Lois. She had told him to dress up as a doctor for the company party, only telling him that it would match well with her outfit. He knew that she had a thing for...special...costumes. Costumes that...well, costumes that he liked. A lot.

"Paging, Dr. Kent! Get it? Get it?"

He turned to see Cat Grant standing behind him, wearing a cat costume. _Of course._ "Hey, Cat. How's it going?"

Cat swooned, "Oh, I'm doing just fine. I see you're here alone tonight. I guess Lois must be busy chasing down some lead?"

Clark was mildly certain that someone had spiked the punch. Cat seemed like she was a little...tipsy.

"I'm sure she's just running a little late."

"It must be tough being married to someone that puts her career first instead of the ones she loves, don't you think?"

She took a step closer to Clark, trying to give him the puppy dog eyes. Not that Clark really noticed that kind of thing. Luckily, Tess did.

"Then I guess it's a good thing that the Planet is paying for Lois and Clark's unlimited texting plan, isn't it?"

Cat looked back to see her former editor. "I guess so."

Tess stared her down until Cat waved a small goodbye to Clark and walked back into the crowd. "Is it any wonder why Lois hates her?"

Clark frowned, "Lois doesn't hate Cat." Her skeptical look forced him to continue. "She just isn't especially fond...of Cat."

"Lois is a _very_ territorial person, I don't think she appreciates how much Cat drools over you."

He rolled his eyes, "Speaking of territory, last time I checked, you didn't work at the Daily Planet anymore."

"If you must know, I'm here because Bruce appointed me the managing partner. Lucius isn't exactly newspaper savvy."

That brought a smile to Clark's face. Whether she knew it or not, Clark was the one that recommended the idea to Bruce not long after he bought the Daily Planet out from under the Luthors. He was glad to have Tess back in the city, he liked having friends that he didn't have to hide his secret from.

"Where is Lois, anyways?"

Across the room, Lois was shuffling between couples dancing, trying to find her sexy doctor counterpart.

"Excuse me...coming through...just need to slide past..." she gasped, squeezing between bodies and kissing couples. "Can you two get a room?"

"Oh, Jimmy..."

Lois stopped in her tracks. "Jimmy?"

"Lois?"

She spun to see her sister standing next to Jimmy. Before she could why her sister was there, she noticed how nervous the two looked. Then she noticed that her sister's sexy witch makeup was all smudged up. Then she noticed that Jimmy had what looked like sexy witch makeup smudged on his face. She looked at Lucy. And then she looked at Jimmy. Then she looked at Lucy. Then she looked at Jimmy. They were nervous and Jimmy looked like he was going to pass out. Lois continued to stare them down, but they were both trying to look innocent.

"Why is your makeup all smudged?" Before she could answer, Lois fixed a glare on Jimmy. "Why is my baby sisters makeup smudged on your face?"

Both of them looked at the ground. "Clark!"

In a moment, Clark was standing at Lois' side. He quickly observed the situation. He quickly realized the situation. Gulp.

"Clark, Sweetie, why do you think Lucy's makeup all smudged and why is it smudged on Jimmy face?"

Jimmy shot Clark a look, almost begging him to save him. Lucy tried to look innocent, but Clark saw a long bead of sweat drip down her brow.

"Uh, well, it is a crowded party, Lois, maybe, uh, they accidentally bonked heads out on the dance floor."

Lois gave him a look that told him he was going to pay for his current stance on the matter. "Then why is only smudged around the mouth?"

"Uh, would you believe that we bonked mouths?"

"Repeatedly?"

"Uh, sure?" Jimmy answered nervously.

The older, but not _that_ older she would have snapped, Lane looked around the room as she considered their answers. "No."

Clark gave Jimmy a '_What-were-you-thinking?_' look and shook his head slightly. Jimmy couldn't help but gulp, quickly giving Clark a 'W_ho-do-you-think runs this show? She's a Lane!_' look that even Clark had to understand. Lucy and Lois watched them communicate telepathically with matching frowns.

"Did you know about this?"

All eyes were on Clark now, as Lois turned to face him with a particularly fierce glare. "Well, I...knew that...maybe...just a little..."

Lois's eyes narrowed as he fumbled his stethoscope, trying to avoid her gaze. "You knew the whole time, didn't you?"

"Not...you know...the whole time."

"It isn't what it looks like, Lois!"

Lois turned back to Jimmy. "No? Then explain."

"Oh. Uh, well, I was...giving her CPR!"

"Unless there is a 'Bobbing for Apples' station around somewhere, I can't think of anywhere for Lucy to drown..."

Jimmy gulped. "Well, I was teaching...her...how to give...you know...CPR."

"Lucy has known CPR since she was in middle school. I had to sign her permission slip for Health class." Lois took a step towards Jimmy.

He quickly turned to Lucy, "You said you were going to protect me!"

He instinctively closed his eyes and subconsciously covered his groin and face, preparing himself for whatever damage was going to come his way. Much to his surprise, she never hit him. '_Maybe Clark saved me? Maybe Superman? Oh god, I hope it was Superman. Clark can't stop Lois._'

When he opened his eyes, Lois was standing there with a small smile. "You poor...poor stupid boy."

She promptly kissed him on the cheek and grabbed Lucy's arm.

Jimmy watched as Lois led Lucy away from the party, not quite understanding the situation. He was secretly dating Lucy Lane, the younger sister of Lois Lane, and instead of killing him, she gave him a kiss on the cheek and appeared to be almost amused by his actions.

"Wait, so you're not mad at me?"

Lois eyed Jimmy with a funny smile, "Why would I be mad at you?"

Jimmy frowned, "For seducing your sister?"

Lois and Lucy let out a laugh and looked at each other. "You think _you_ seduced _my_ sister?"

"Well, yeah. We've been sleeping together for months."

"MONTHS?"

Clark lightly pushed Jimmy behind him, "Run, Jimmy. Just run."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahaha, oh Jimmy boy, haha. What did you guys think? It's a bit on the long side, but I suspect I won't hear any complains, haha. He was this close to getting out without any pain, Lois was just going to kill Lucy, and now, she's going to kill poor Jimmy. I still owe you a chapter for today (this one was for yesterday's lack of a chapter), but I'll post it in a little bit to give you guys some time in between.

Anyways, thanks for understanding my computer problems! I just got it back a couple hours ago. Anyways, I hope you liked it!


	63. The Barn

**Groveling:** Ok folks, I feel completely awful, but shortly after I posted 'Halloween', my computer crashed again. Apparently, when they fixed it the first time, they had messed something up or forgotten something, whatever it was, I just got it back today. Since I didn't have anything in my Manager that I could post, I was stuck with nothing to post. But I'm back, and I've got some stuff ready to post, so I promise three chapters today! Hope that makes up for the delay! I feel terrible because I came back and promised to catch up and then I let you guys down!

The next three chapters are super Clois-y, so I think that you guys can at least forgive me! haha.

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - Then I think you'll like this one! haha.

**_Katlynne_** - That moment had me laughing so hard! Whoosh! Hahahaha. That was a phenomenal episode, I LOVED the Christopher Reeve glasses push at the end there, I loved it when I saw it for the first time in 'Apocalypse' when he was in that Alternate Universe (where Lois totally fell for him, literally and figuratively, hahaha), love those moments!

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - I was trying to find something to call their pairing, and that was the first thing that came to mind, hahahaha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I'm glad you liked that! People just underestimate Clark Kent, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think it'll be a combination of poor and lucky Clark, haha. I'm glad you liked the glasses push, I went absolutely crazy! And since I messed up with the chapters, I'll give you another spoiler, haha, if you like Drunk Clois, watch out for 'St Patricks Day'...hahahaha.

**_A,sky_** - Haha, I didn't think you would complain too much.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - The idea that Jimmy is in control, is a lot like the idea that Clark is in control, haha. It's just hilarious! haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_sunset _**- To be honest, I totally blanked on Tess, but Lucy was dressed up as a Sexy Witch. And yes, Lois was a sexy nurse, and that will be expanded upon in a future chapter, hahaha. I guess I blanked on Jimmy too, haha. As for the upcoming 'Fortune' chapter, I think it'll all work out by the end of the episode and we'll get our wonderful Clois moments. I just worry that Chloe is going to die, it's her last episode of the season from what I hear.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hints of Clark/Lucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #63, the Barn

**Author's Note: **This one takes place during 'Lucy'.

**

* * *

**

'_Oh. My. God. Could they make me anymore nauseous?_'

Lois stomped into the barn, watching Lucy and Clark make little puppy dog eyes at each other. She didn't know why she was upset, nor did she care.

"Hey, uh, Lois, didn't you that?"

She couldn't bite it back. Not that she really tried. "I'm sorry, did you say something?" Fixing a glare at her...uh...the Farmboy in question.

"Go get changed, I'm going to work," she ordered Lucy.

Clark was surprised. _Work?_

"Since when did you work?"

"Since today. I'm helping your mom out at the Talon, so Chloe is going to be your official Smallville tour guide," Lois told Lucy before turning back to give Clark another threatening look. "Not that there is much to see..."

The two kept each other's gaze before Lucy chose to speak up, "Oh, I don't know. So far it looks pretty good."

Lois _really_ wanted to slap that smile off Clark's face as he turned to watch Lucy leave the barn.

"Don't let all that flirting go to your head," she told him, grabbing his arm and leading him away. "She goes to an all girls school, you're probably the first guy she's talked to in a couple months."

"Lois, I don't want you to get the wrong idea," Lois whipped around, not wanting to hear what 'the _'idea_' was, "but ever since Lucy came to town, you've been grumpier than normal. Are you not happy to see your sister?"

She gave him an unconvincing, "Of course I am."

But in her head, she found herself thinking, '_Of course not! She wouldn't stroll into town without being in trouble, and I especially don't like the looks that she's been giving you!...because...because...Lucy is all wrong for him! He is all trusting and naive and she's all conniving and...crap, he's looking at me._'

"Look, there's a thing with sisters. You can love them, without really liking them."

He looked all matter of confused. '_See! Trusting and naive!_' she screamed internally. "You don't like your own sister?"

"More like...she's not all that crazy about me. Not that I blame her."

"Look, you might a little rough around the edges, but as far as sisters go, Lucy could do a lot worse."

Now Lois was the one that was all matter of confused, '_Did he just...he didn't...was that..._'

"Thanks for the ringing endorsement." She felt something...rise up in herself. "When my mother died, my dad had two girls he didn't know how to deal with so he did what any good military leader would do: He instituted a chain of command, and I reported to him..."

"And Lucy reported to you."

"Yeah, it takes sibling rivalry to a whole new level. I had to make sure she had three square meals, got to school, did her homework."

Clark frowned but nodded, "You became her mother."

"Yeah, except I was...not prepared. I used to give her advice like uh, you know, don't kiss a boy or you're gunna get pregnant? And yeah, maybe she had a few more chores than most kids."

"Is that why she decided to go to boarding school?"

She had to contain a laugh. "Uh...yeah...unlike your family, there was no discussion. When the General gives an order, you're expected to carry it out."

"Wow, that sounds kind of harsh."

"Trust me, Lucy got the better end of the deal." Clark's look made her continue, "I mean, don't get me wrong, she totally deserves it, but I guess there was just a part of me that was jealous that she got out and I didn't."

They had a little moment, and she realized that she had just spilled her guts to Clark Kent in the middle of his barn. She couldn't remember for the life of her what caused her to do such a thing. She couldn't remember telling anyone about her family like that.

"I got to go to work. I hear your mother is a slave driver."

Clark watched her walk away, and he couldn't help but feel like he had just seen a side of Lois Lane that no many got to see. And he liked it.

Later that night he caught her in the loft looking up at the stars. He couldn't help but be amused since she had told him countless times that only geeks and stalkers used telescopes. They shared a little talk about Lucy and about the General, and he couldn't help but feel that same feeling that he had felt in the barn when she explained her family. He felt like she wasn't jus that annoying girl that kicked him out of his bed.

She was something else all together, even if he couldn't quite figure out what exactly that was.

"You're amazing, Smallville."

He looked over at her, he didn't see that coming. "You always look for the best in people, even when they walk all over you."

So maybe they still liked to tease each other, but they were more than _just_ that now. "I guess that explains why we're friends."

"Oh, we're friends now?"

Clark noticed something in her eyes that told him she wasn't asking him just so that they could continue their banter. He noticed that the same thing that he felt inside of himself when he said it in the first place: a hope that the statement was true.

"Well, I...I won't tell anyone if you don't."

She gave him one of her trademark smirks and a quick punch in the arm as she walked past, he caught the scent of her shampoo along the way. He spun to see her stopped just short of the stairs, and the two shared a look before she made her way down the stairs.

'_I don't know if friendship describes Lois Lane's role in my life, but I do know I'm happy that she's here..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? haha. I wanted to do something really heartfelt and really Clois oriented, and this is what came of it. Like in some of the other flashback chapters that we've had so far, this seems like a really important moment in their relationship.

Anyways, the next chapter will be up in a bit, I'll reply to any reviews before I post it, but I'll still reply if you don't get a chance before then.

**Next Up:** Silver Banshee


	64. Christmas Day

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Thanks! It was certainly one of those first moments where they made some progress!

_**Katlynne**_ - I love it when he calls her Ms. Lane, hahaha. But Whoosh was just...I don't think 'epic' is an epic enough word it, haha.

**_ElenaIsabella_** - Thanks!

_**sunset**_ - Haha, you're so right! It could have been a minor call-back to her bossing him around in "J'onn", haha. "_Haven't we done this before?_" he thinks to himself, hahaha. The thing about Chloe is that from all the sources I've seen, this will be her final episode and I haven't seen anything to imply or say that she will be in the Finale. That's not to say she won't be, and it was be so wrong for her not to be there, but I keep hearing this will be her final episode of the series. I really hope that she back, just like I had hoped Lana would be back, just because these people _need_ to be back. Just one more reason why I have a total man-crush on Michael Rosenbaum, now more than ever, for coming back to play Lex one last time.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #64, Christmas Day

**Author's Note:** This chapter takes place the day after 'Christmas Eve'. Hope you guys are ready for a long one, hahaha.

**

* * *

**

"Did you hear all that commotion last night?"

The heads of a certain Mr. Queen and a certain Mr. Wayne shot into the air. Clark eyed them over the top of his paper, "Sure didn't, Lois."

Both Oliver and Bruce sighed dramatically. Chloe and Diana frowned at their respective partners.

"Can we pplllleeeeeaaaassssseeeeee open presents now?" called Jo'an.

Lois rolled her eyes, "When Grandma and Grandpa get here."

"But they're so slow!"

Clark stepped in before the two most important women in his life could kill each other, "Jo'an, just a few more minutes."

"Can't you just fly and get 'em?" she whined.

"You know why."

Jo'an flared her nose, crossed arms, and plopped down on the floor next to her Uncle Ollie. "I don't get why he can't know..." she muttered.

Oliver let out a little chuckle and patted her on the head, "There, there, Joey. Patience is a virtue."

"Says someone who can't super-speed," she teased.

"Oh snap!"

Every turned to see Bart Allen walk through the door. "Bobo!"

"All day she's being a brat, he walks through the door, and she lights up. Freakin' kid," muttered Lois.

"Honey, I'm sure you used to do the same when you met your favorite boy," whispered Clark, wagging his eyebrows to imply himself.

Lois did her best to contain a smile, and more or less failed. Probably more. "Shut your face, Smallville."

She gave him a quick peck on the cheek before heading back into the kitchen. She had barely made it when she heard tires scratch against the gravel in the driveway, causing her to peek out the window to see who was arriving. A glimpse of the grill told her it was-

"The Gramps is here!"

'_Why does that kid think it's okay to just assign nicknames?_' she thought with a frown. "Smallville, don't let Junior touch a single present!"

Clark couldn't help but let out a laugh. Little did Lois know, Jo'an was now frozen half way to the presents. Or maybe Lois did know that her daughter would consider the driveway as close enough for presents. Either way, he thought it was adorable.

"Now where's my granddaughter?"

Jo'an quickly rushed, but not too quickly of course, and jumped into her grandfather's arms. "You took..." Jo'an sucked in a breath, "...forever!"

The General laughed and hugged her tightly, "It's not _my_ fault your grandmother think every rest-stop is a must-stop."

A hand quickly swatted his arm, "Oh hush, Sam. And where is my hug, young lady?"

Quickly, a little too quickly for Clark's comfort, Jo'an was in her grandmother's arms and squeezing her tight. "I missed you so much!" Jo'an would then pull her grandmother even closer and whisper in her ear just for Martha to hear, "...but at least I can run and visit you!"

Martha let out a laugh. '_Yes, being the grandmother instead of the grandfather had it's perks,_' she mused.

A moment later, Jo'an and her eyes were fixed on her mother, causing Lois to let out a dramatic sigh.

"Fine you little monster, rip into them."

The activity went as expected. She darted for Uncle Oliver and Uncle Bruce's presents first, which left them to argue about who gave her the better present and who as the favorite. Jo'an just rolled her eyes and went on to Uncle AC and Uncle Mera's present.

"No way! I get to visit you in-"

AC quickly cut her off, "At our place. Yep. You get to visit us at our place."

His gaze shifted to the General, who was busy eating one of Lois's christmas cookies. And then washing down the taste of Lois's christmas cookies. Aunt Kara promised to give Jo'an some _flying_ lessons, because Aunt Kara was a part time pilot. At least that's what they told the General. Soon it was time for the rest of the group to open their own presents and it was Clark's turn to open the present Lois had given him.

The box was barely open when he quickly shut it and turned bright red. Eyes shot to Lois, expecting to see her upset that Clark didn't like his gift, but to their surprise she appeared to be quite happy with herself. "Well? What did you think, Clarkie?"

Clark shot Lois a half-hearted glare. "It's...nice."

"Clark, honey, why don't you show us what she got-"

"No!"

His mother looked at him in shock for cutting her off. "Why not?"

"Yeah, Clark. Why not?" chimed in Oliver with a smirk. Bruce and AC were snickering, while Bart looked excited to see the present.

Clark's gaze shifted around the room, "It's uh...just uh...it's just a sweater."

"Why do I imagine that there isn't enough fabric for it to be a sweater, Clark?" quipped Mera. Clark shot her a glare.

"I think that's my cue for a refill," said the General, who stood and went into the kitchen.

He was peering into the fridge, trying to select his next drink when he heard a board creak from behind.

"So, how long have you known?"

The General turned back to see Martha. "Excuse me?"

"Don't tell me you think it's normal for your granddaughter receive a bow-and-arrow training set orin flying lessons," she laughed as she sipped eggnog. "Let alone the fact that two of the richest men in the world are in there bickering about being her favorite uncle."

He smiled for a moment, "I had my suspicions the night that the Blur saved Lois at the Talon." Martha nodded for him to continue. "And of course, I know all about Mr. Curry's day job and who Mr. Queen used to be, or so he _says_ he used to be. It doesn't hurt that Jo'an threw a toy through the wall of my house in Washington when she was a baby."

Martha let out a laugh, "Why didn't you ever tell them?"

"Martha..." he smiled, "I do have a sense of humor, you know?"

Later that night, when all the guests had departed and Jo'an was sleeping softly in her room, Lois and Clark were left to do the dishes in the kitchen. He had offered as usual to do them at super-speed, but she enjoyed doing the dishes with him. It brought her back to a time before she knew his secret, a time when her biggest fear was for Jonathan or Martha Kent to hear her threaten Clark.

"So."

He looked up with a smirk. He had been waiting for this.

"Did you like your present?" she asked with a smirk of her own forming on her face.

"You know...if I didn't know any better, I would think you're trying to seduce me."

Lois smiled widely and traced a tooth with her tongue, "Are you saying that I even have to try, Smallville?"

"I don't know if you _needed_ to try, but my spidey-senses _are_ tingling, Lois."

She rolled her eyes, "You and your comic books, is it any wonder you fly around in a big red cape?"

"I've never heard you complain," he quipped, closing the gap between their faces.

She moved in a little closer before stopping. "I always have liked you in red." The steamy kiss that proceeded left them, well, left Lois gasping for air.

Clark leaned back and got a devilish look in his eye, Lois narrowed her eyes in anticipation.

"You know, I always knew that you liked my plaid, you just wanted me to get rid of it so you weren't so tempted."

Lois pulled her head back and let out a laugh, "Oh, it's so on, Smallville!"

She tackled him to the floor, though they would grace many different surfaces by the end of the night. As Clark laid in bed, he brushed back some of Lois' hair as she softly breathed against his bare chest. His smile grew when she snuggled closer, leaving him with one thought:

'_Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night. Tonight was a good night._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** I know that 'Silver Banshee' was supposed to be next, but I got this one done first, so I wanted to post it! I hope you guys liked it!

We had ourselves a whole bunch of guest stars and call backs, it was nice to have Jo'an back, it's been a while. Hopefully getting to have the General, Mrs. Kent, Bobo, Oliver and Bruce, and the rest of the gang was fun for everyone!

**Next Up:** Silver Banshee


	65. Silver Banshee

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! I'm glad that it was up to the standard!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #65, Silver Banshee

**Author's Note:** This takes place during 'Escape', starting right before Lois and Clark run into Chloe and Oliver.

**

* * *

**Clark wrapped an arm around Lois and began to guide her back towards their room, '_I like where this is going_,' she quipped thoughtfully.

_BUZZ_

And now the light were back on, '_At least he'll get to see what I have planned for him now._'

A foot later, she saw blonde. Two blondes. Two blondes wearing flannel robes. Two blondes wearing flannel robes and not much else. Two blondes wearing flannel robes and not much us but were standing very close together. "A twist..."

By the time they got back upstairs, Lois was pacing at a speed that even he was a little jealous of.

"I knew that they haven't been seeing anybody lately, and of course she turns down all my attempts to set her up with a McHunky-"

"Hey."

"-for her sweetie. And well, Oliver has been uncharacteristically quiet in the tabloids lately. How didn't we see this coming? How did I not know!"

Clark grimaced and shrugged her shoulders, "Oliver can be very...discreet, when he wants to be."

Lois snorted, "Because you know Ollie so well?"

"We're friendly."

"Uh huh, and me and Tess are going to set up a bowling league. Come on, Smallville. You've got to get up _pretty_ early to put one past Lois Lane."

"Except this one got past you."

Lois stopped in her tracks and narrowed her eyes, "You better watch it, after the screams we heard tonight? Lets just say that we'll be playing a little game of the Little Farmboy who cried Wolf, but nobody bothered to get out of bed to check on him, capish?"

Clark let out a chuckle and rolled his eyes. Lois took that as her window to begin pacing again.

"How long do you think this has been going on? What do you think has been going on? Oh god, what if she gets pregnant? What if they get married?"

"Don't you think you're getting a little ahead of yourself?"

She glared at Clark, "First off, there is nothing wrong with covering your bases and all the possibilities. Secondly, if they could fly under the radar for this long without one of us, more importantly me, noticing? Who knows what other little secrets they have brewing!"

The topic of secrets and Oliver, Clark, and Chloe made him shift a little bit on the bed. "Maybe we should just get some sleep."

"And attack them in the morning, you're so right. Good thinking, Smallville."

Lois shimmied out of her blue robe and revealed her little blue nightdress with much less fanfare now that she was focused on Chloe and Oliver.

"Yeah...thinking...good," he said in a very distracted tone.

She laid down in the bed and stared at the ceiling, for a moment, Clark thought about leaning over to kiss her. As he slowly made his move-

"I just can't believe it. Chloe and Oliver. Oliver and Chloe. It's just so...weird..."

Clark laid back down on his back, '_It's gunna be a long night..._'

"But in a good way. I mean, I like it. Assuming he doesn't break her heart. If he does, I'll break his legs..."

"Lois, nobody needs to break anybody's anything."

A glare made him add, "Including me or anything of mine, so go ahead and continue though."

She gave him a smile and kissed his nose, "That's more like it, Smallville."

He nodded with a silly grin, '_I am made out of steel and yet her glares scare me more than Zod's do. Perfect._'

"I just didn't think she was really, you know, out on the market. I thought she was still depressed about...you know..."

"Jimmy."

"Yeah, I haven't even seen her notice another guy. And I mean, you should see the hunks we run into-

"Hey.

"-for her, not for me, sweetie. I haven't even seen her check out those buns of steel on that intern on the fourth floor-

"Lois."

"-I prefer farmboy buns, sweetie. I just didn't see it coming! But it's all so obvious now! Chloe and Oliver!"

The ranting continued for a good hour longer, Lois had apparently formed an opinion on everything from what kind of double dates the four of them should go on to whether or not they had "done the deed" in the apartment they shared at the Talon.

"They sure as hell better not have! I eat on that table!" she screeched.

After a while, Clark looked over to see Lois breathing softly. She looked like an angel. He went to pull up the covers so that she couldn't get cold but when his forearm grazed her wrist, she reached an arm over and cuddle up against him instead. In his head, he was doing a very immature happy dance that he would never ever tell her about as she would never let him live it down, but as she pulled closer, he didn't really care.

Her shampoo drifted into his nostrils, and he placed a soft kiss on her head. "Smallville...you're so...super."

He grinned like an idiot and flicked off the light to blanket them in darkness.

Before falling asleep, he whispered, "You're pretty super too, Lois."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope you guys liked it! I should be caught up now, and the next chapter is already ready to go! This all of course was inspired by the line that Lois utters when they come downstairs for brunch about how she talked and talked about Oliver and Chloe and then passed out. I hope that you guys enjoyed the banter and back and forth aspect of the chapter, haha, I know that it was dialogue heavy.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Lara._


	66. Lara

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm quite found of Jo'an and Lois myself, haha, they're just hilarious!

**_Katlynne_** - Oh boy, you're going to make me blush! haha. I figured that the General is...well, he is the General, haha. I'm sure he would have had his suspicions over the years, especially with certain company involved. Sure, you might be able to get away with Oliver Queen since Chloe has been involved with him and everything, but Bruce Wayne? Arthur Curry? Not to mention being around when Jo'an didn't know how to control her powers? He has to know, lol.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I was really considering writing a new chapter where Silver Banshee returns, but how do you pass up 'Escape'? haha. And I thought you guys might enjoy a little bit of Clois Steaminess, haha. I think just seeing her in that little night dress was enough for him to put up with her, haha, when i watched it again to get the dialogue from the very beginning, I was like, "Gulp." hahahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents, the Els, the Langs

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #66, Lara

**Author's Note:** Can take place really anytime after 'Isis' I suppose. And I don't know why, but I hear 'Every Breath You Take' by the Police during the dance, in case you want to set the mood, haha. Just a suggestion for those of you that like that sort of thing.

**

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**

"Lois, do you know who this is? In this picture?"

She walked over to Martha and looked over her shoulder at the polaroid incased in a wood frame. "Oh, that's Lara."

Martha turned and looked at her in surprise, "Lara? Clark's...Clark's mother?"

"His biological mother," she told her, putting a hand on her shoulder. "You are Clark's mom."

Martha smiled warmly at her, she could feel tears stinging in her eyes. "And if anybody tells you differently, I'll kick their as...I mean, their butt."

'_Leave it to Lois to make me smile,_' she thought with a laugh.

"Apparently she had come to visit sometime before they sent Clark. I think she came with Kara?"

Lois watched as Martha looked at the picture with an intense gaze. "Is everything ok?"

Martha looked up and smiled, "No, no, everything is fine. I just...I've seen this woman before."

"Really?"

"Yes. I...I know I have. With Jonathan. We saw her...we saw her at..."

_The Talon was a packed house. It had once been a historic landmark in Smallville, but thanks to the influx of big name multiplex theaters, they were having to get creative if they were going to survive. It was the mid-1980's and they were hosting an event to stir up interest._

_"Wow, this looks beautiful, Jonathan. This was a wonderful idea."_

_He smiled softly, 'She drops hints for weeks that she wants to go dancing and she still pretends like it was my idea. I love this woman.'_

_As the couple made their way over to their table, another couple walked through the door. A beautiful blonde walked in with a tall brunette man, their eyes scanning the dance floor. They spotted the Kents across the room and took one of the tables with a good view._

_"Look at the way he holds her hand," the Blonde whispered. "Oh, and the way that he pulls out her chair."_

_The Brunette smiled, "Lara, dear, all of the men are doing those things."_

_Lara rolled her eyes, "But he loves her so!"_

_Jor-El watched as Martha giggled while Jonathan whispered something into her ear. She seemed to light up at his mere touch._

_"I cannot argue with that. It reminds me of the way that Hiram and Jessica behaved, Jonathan's parents."_

_Martha watched the Langs at a nearby table with their baby daughter, Lana. Jonathan noticed the way that her eyes shined at the sight of the baby girl cradled in Laura's arms. He also noticed the proud smile on Lewis' face when he managed to provoke a giggle from the child. Martha turned to look at her husband with a sad expression on her face, "Jonathan..."_

_"We're trying, honey."_

_Her expression darkened, "Hey. We're going to get there, ok?"_

_"You heard what the doctor said..."_

_"I don't care what some doctor said. If you want a family, we're going to have a family."_

_Martha smiled, "I hope so."_

_"I promise you, Martha. We will have a family of our own someday. But for tonight, can we just have this?"_

_Martha looked at him with a loving expression, "Take me to do the dance floor, Mr. Kent."_

_"My pleasure, Mrs. Kent."_

_They swayed back and forth to the music. Jonathan breathed in that wonderful shampoo that always left him a little dizzy, while Martha found that even a nice suit and tie couldn't rob her husband of that classic smell of grass and cologne._

_"I love you."_

_He placed a kiss to the top of her head, "I love you too."_

_Across the room, the decision was made. If Krypton fell, the Kents would raise Kal-El, the last son of Krypton. Jor-El and Lara had watched them for a little more than a week, and they knew that there were few people better suited for the task. Their hearts burst with love and compassion, and they would be the perfect couple to raise their son to become a hero on the planet Earth. Neither of them had a doubt of that._

_"They remind me of us in many ways," she told him._

_Jor-El smiled and pulled her close. "Because of her unbearable desire for him?"_

_Lara let out a giggle, "I was going to say his undeniable ability to get on her nerves, but I suppose we could say that as well."_

_"I believe the expression is 'tomayto, tomahto', dear," he joked._

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Haha. I brought Papa-K back! Haha. Right off the bat, I (like many others) have long called 'Every Breath You Take' by a very different name: 'The Stalker Song'. Haha. I know that it's kind of a creepy song but there is no denying that we all love it! haha. Just the beat to it, I have always thought of it as a love song despite knowing better, haha. Anyways, I hope it still worked.

To the story, I randomly watched 'Lara' last night and I just couldn't get the idea that they might have watched Jonathan and Martha together to judge if they were like Hiram and Jessica. I made sure to watch all of Lara-El's appearances again to make sure that nothing conflicted with this, hopefully the only thing that might seem out of sorts is that Clark never told Martha that he found the picture. Which is, I admit, a stretch.

I hope everyone caught that line, "but for tonight, can we just have this?", which mirrored Lois and Clark in 'Homecoming'. That was my favorite bit. Well, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought! I'm excited to hear from everyone!

**Next Up:** _Not sure yet, but it'll probably be a flashback chapter._


	67. Aquaman

**Review Comments:**

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I too wished that, I kept hoping they would at least run into each other or something. I have to write something about a clone Lara just like I did for Jor-El, so there is always a chance that could happen!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - It does seem more ideal that you would check out the people instead of the house, doesn't it? haha.

**_A,sky_** - I don't know how much I liked it either, but I had written the whole chapter without that scene and then I realized...how does he not realize that when he is sitting in a room full of photographed heroes, Bruce Wayne, and have been around Jo'an for so long? I didn't want to cut out the Uncles and Aunts when they would totally visit on Christmas, and it didn't feel right not to include the General, so I came up with that tidbit.

_**katlynne**_ - Haha, oh god. And yes, creepy in a good way, haha. Thats a great idea for one of them to notice, especially considering the fact that you would think someone would open their eyes at some point. I might have to write something to that effect!

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Hit the nail on the head, my friend. They _both_ need each other. For some reason, I always imagine Lois being annoyed with how Jo'an throws around nicknames, haha. Despite the fact that she does it ALL THE TIME, haha.

**_cathy03_** - Agreed, they certainly turned a corner in that episode. I too wonder about that. Lois seemed pretty keen on it in 'Upgrade'. I had no idea that english wasn't your first language, you speak (or write, haha) it so well! But I totally hear what you're saying about the song, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I LOVED Masquerade, haha. It was like the way I alway hoped they would be, and I'm still walking on air over the glasses and 'Miss Lane' stuff, hahaha. I missed Jo'an as well, haha, she's such a wonderful little monster. League is definitely one of my top favorites too! haha.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, I wanted to expand upon that, but I thought it seemed better suited as just a little joke at the start, haha. Of course Clark heard them fighting in the living room. How could Jo'an hear them and not Superman? haha. We shall see _exactly_ what it was up ahead, haha. I wasn't exactly a fan of the idea of the General knowing, but like I was telling , how does he not know by now? haha. I would say that Jo'an is at the hotel with Grandma, but I can't ever imagine Lois and Clark allowing her to stay in a hotel! haha. Lets just say that Jo'an was VERY sleepy, haha.

I wanted Lana to return, but it's been announced she won't, so oh well, haha. I just wanted EVERYONE back. I would have even brought back Whitney Fordman in a sort of "_remembering the journey_" flashback moment as Clark gets ready to fly for the first time. Just seems like the right thing to do.

She might not notice how sexy she is to him then, but she certainly knows now, haha. While I doubt anything happened during 'Escape', Lois did seem keen on it during 'Upgrade', which suggests to me that something probably did before 'Harvest'. But with it being a TV show and all, I get that they kind of dial down that sort of stuff. I can't imagine that Lois and Oliver _didn't_, but I also don't know why Chloe would have to ask permission. I know that Lois and Oliver were pretty serious and everything, but that was a very long time ago in a Smallville far, far away, haha.

Originally, the story did end with another Lois and Martha scene. But it wasn't nearly as fitting of an ending as the way it ended, so I kind of just left it that way. A part of it was that I also liked the way it cut off into a setting of the scene, because I didn't really see a way to set the scene dialogue wise in a very natural way. So I like the way that worked out. At this point, Jor-El and Lara aren't sure Krypton will fall, they're just looking at backup options.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I really wish that Jonathan was still around, he'll be back for 'Kent' and of course 'the Finale', so I'm SUPER excited for that!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** AC/Lois, Clana, hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #67, Aquaman

**Author's Note:** Takes place during 'Aqua' from good ole Season 5.

**

* * *

**

"I don't know what it is about this guy, but I got a bad feeling."

She fixed a curious look on him, "And this has nothing to do with the fact that you caught him with Lois?"

Clark glared at her. "Just kidding...geeze Clark, you really ought to ice that vein sticking out of your forehead."

"I'm going to speed over to the Talon and see if I can't dig something up about him."

In a _whoosh_, Clark was gone and Chloe couldn't help but chuckle. "Someone is a tiny bit jealous..."

Clark found AC with Lois and Lana at the Talon. Lois was busy telling some annoying story about what a great swimmer AC was. At least it was annoying to him anyways. Lana seemed rather entertained by the whole thing. Clark thought it was all a bit too fishy.

"You guys, you should have seen this guy. It was amazing. I've never seen anybody swim so fast. Or drink so much water."

He faintly heard AC say something annoying about keeping his skin soft.

Clark caught a look at Lois, '_I can swim fast. Lets see how fast he is on his feet._'

"So how do you like the University of Miami?"

Lois looked surprised, "You got to school in Miami?"

"Yeah..." AC turned to look at Clark intimidatingly, "How did you know that?"

Clark didn't waver. "I'm a big fan of college swimming."

"Really? Since when?" questioned Lana.

"Since Arthur Curry started dominating the sport."

Lois couldn't believe the sight before her. '_Was Clark Kent jealous?_'

"So how did you learn to swim so fast?"

AC hesitated. "I don't know. I guess it runs in the family."

He turned to get a reaction out of Lois, which Clark noticed all too well. "My dad operates a lighthouse down south, he swims like a dead weight. It must of been my mom with the skills, but she died when I was a baby."

"AC, I'm so sorry."

Clark nearly blurted out that both of his parents died in a horrific explosion that robbed him of his entire race. But he didn't.

"I'm not going to say it doesn't suck, but..." AC shrugged, "you know, growing up in the water was awesome. I probably spent more time in it than out."

Clark made sure to glance at Lois, who apparently thought this was endearing.

"So what brings you to the most landlocked spot on the map?"

"Crater Lake. Last few months a bunch of fish have been dying off. The EPA blames it on temperature change, but I think that's totally bogus."

Clark didn't waver, "Smallville is a long ways to go to check on temperature changes."

Lois certainly made a note of that. AC's expression turned to a glare. "Not if you care about the world you live in."

The two shared a glare.

"You see, people think that what happens in the ocean and lakes doesn't affect their lives, but it does. It's all connected."

Clark noticed that Lois had eaten up that line, so he couldn't help himself, "Do you really believe that? Or is that a pick-up line for the girls?"

"Clark!" exlaimed Lana.

"Smallville, can I talk to you over here for a minute?" asked Lois with a pained expression.

AC scoffed and Lois came to drag Clark away, "There's a cinnamon bun I need your opinion on."

Once she had him away, she crossed her arms and took the '_Lois Tone'_ with him.

"What are you doing? I already have an overprotective dad, I don't need an overprotective brother. Especially one who isn't my brother."

Clark turned back to look at AC with a glare. "Am I the only one that thinks there is something fishy about this guy?"

"Yes. Now quit being a jerk," she ordered as she walked back to AC and Lana.

"I'm sorry about that," she told AC.

He looked up from his water, "It's cool. I gotta bounce."

"Do you want some company?" she offered.

"No, I got a few things I need to take care of, so...I'll just swing by later."

AC walked past Clark slowly, and Clark looked back to see the girls staring at him. '_Normally they want to kiss me, now they want to kill me._'

"You know, you're right. I was being a jerk. I'm gunna go apologize."

He was halfway to the door when he realized he had just thought about Lois kissing him. He was halfway to the lake when he realized he didn't hate the thought of it. Not that he was about to admit to himself that might, maybe, kind of, sort of, could like it. Just that he didn't _not_ like it.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that for an Aquaman chapter? I remember someone asking about a flashback to 'Aqua' and it seemed like the perfect chance to scratch some of those 'Jealous Clark' itches, haha, while covering our favorite Fishstick.

This one was mostly flashback, though that opening did have some new lead-in stuff. I mostly just wanted to set up the idea of Clark being jealous, even though it was totally obvious the whole episode. Off the top of my head, it's the first time we've seen the jealousy flair up in Clark. That's always fun for everyone involved I think, haha. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I haven't decided yet, but I suspect it'll be a post-Season 10 story.


	68. Billy

**Review Comments:**

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Now that you said it like that, I'm doubting myself, haha, but I'm pretty sure I saw something about him being back for it.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, I tried! If you watch the episode, especially the part I wrote about, he keeps looking at Lois, like, a lot! haha.

_**NonMonisMoriar**_ - I know how you feel, haha. But folks love Jealous Clark, and that was prime Jealous Clark right there, haha.

**_katlynne_** - Well, I appreciate your faith in me! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Yeah, even I almost swooned when Clark said that, haha. I giggled like Blanche from the Golden Girls, haha. "Oh my..." hahahaha.

**_clarkfan325_** - I thought that was pretty funny myself, like I was telling h-g-j-l-e-r-k, watch it again and look how many times Clark looks over at Lois in that scene! hahaha. I thought I was stretching his distrust of AC but after seeing that, he was SUPER jealous, hahahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, I really liked how little he seemed to pay attention to Lana with Lois having a guy around, haha. It was a refreshing look at things and even when they were supposedly happy, Lois always catches his eye!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #68, Billy Batson

**Author's Note:** I couldn't not write this after watching 'Superman/Shazam!: The Return of Black Adam' the other night.

**

* * *

**

"Wow."

Fawcett City was a long ways in the rearview window for Billy Batson. At least for today.

An orphan from Fawcett City who worked as a homeless newsboy and often occupant of subway terminals, Billy was on a string of tough luck. At least until the day that he met Clark Kent, one of the star reporters for the Daily Planet in Metropolis. Billy had saved the clumsy Mr. Kent from falling onto the train tracks one day and Mr. Kent repaid him by buying him breakfast at a nearby diner.

Billy told him his sad story about his parents dying and his uncle abandoning him after he stole Billy's trust fund. He was still looking for his sister, Mary. The crazy thing was that Mr. Kent didn't run, and he came back to the very next day and bought Billy breakfast all over again.

'_That Mr. Kent, he is something alright. He's like a normal version of Superman,_' he thought as he walked up the steps alongside Clark.

You see, Billy had dreams of being a news reporter. So, Mr. Kent decided he'd let Billy live the dream for a day. He went and picked up him up in Fawcett City and now they were walking up the stairs towards the Daily Planet, where news isn't just reported, it's _made_.

"Welcome to the Daily Planet, Billy. Whenever a story happens, the Planet gets it first and has it webbed and in print while the New York Times is still fishing for sources," joked Clark. But Billy took it with an awe like Clark just recited a great presidential speech.

"I see that our newest reporter is finally here!"

They turned to see none other than Lois Lane running towards them, "What a little heartbreaker you have here, Smallville."

Billy couldn't help but turn bright red while Clark rolled his eyes with an amused smirk, "Watch out kid, she's a handful."

Lois' eyes flashed with mischief at Clark. "And you would know," she purred to her husband with a quick kiss.

"And you...are getting your very own Daily Planet press badge," she told Billy before pulling out a badge on a tie.

Billy held it in his hand, his picture and name were on it and everything. "Holy moley! Are you for real?"

Lois nodded her head with a wide grin, "This is so awesome! Thanks, Mrs. Kent!"

"Actually-"

Clark bumped her with his hip and gave her the Kent puppy dog eyes, causing her to roll her own. "Oh fine, your welcome Billy."

"Hey, it wasn't all her, buddy, the Olsen with the skills-

"The Olsen that is dating my baby sister."

Gulp.

"The _Wholesome_ Olsen took care of all the photoshop and laminating on that bad boy."

Billy laughed at their exchange, "Are you Jimmy Olsen? The one that takes all of their pictures?"

"In the flesh."

"That's so cool! Do you really have a watch that lets you call Superman whenever you are in trouble?"

Jimmy held out his arm to show off his watch. "What do you think? I know the plastic makes it look kind of cheap, but it's still cool."

Clark frowned, "Well, Jimmy, I'm sure that Superman works on a budget. The beacon was probably very, very expensive."

The trio turned to look at Clark, who became very interested in his tie in that moment. "I'm just saying," he mumbled.

Billy went with Jimmy to go look at the watch in question at Jimmy's desk. Clark watched on with a satisfied smile. He really wanted to help this boy. Billy got into a lot of trouble just trying to be a good kid, and it was nice for kids like that to get a break.

'_"Be good, and good will follow." That's what my parents always used to tell me. But you know, Mr Kent, I was good before they were taken from me, I was good at the foster home, and I was good about fifteen minutes ago! I'm starting to think being good isn't good for me..._' Billy told him at the diner.

Clark felt for the boy, he really did. He knew what it was like to try and be a good person, only to face adversity time and time again.

'_It seems that way sometimes, doesn't it? But that's why good is hard. Bad is always easy,_' Clark explained. His father told him that once.

At that moment, Lois plopped down on the desk beside him. "You're going to be a great father, you know that?"

Clark smiled, "You think?"

"You brought a subway orphan all the way from Indiana to Metropolis, Clark. You're amazing. People don't do stuff like that."

Clark made to say something countering that notion, but Lois silenced him, "They don't, Smallville. Only you."

They shared that gaze for a few seconds, and Clark started to lean in to kiss her. Instead, Lois hopped down and punched him in the arm.

"Don't let it go to your head though, you're not using that against me later."

And like that she was gone. But Billy was back. And it looked like he had heard their conversation.

"How come she hit you instead of kiss you?" asked Billy with a confused expression.

Clark laughed, "Well, sometimes when you think one thing, and Lois does the other just to surprise you."

"Does she ever do what you're expecting?"

"Sometimes."

Billy pondered that, "What happens when you think she is going to hit you, and she does?"

"Usually I run," joked Clark.

The boy laughed considering Lois was very small compared to Mr. Kent's towering height. "And if you think she's going to kiss you and she does?"

"Well, Billy..." Clark started to grin at the thought but realized who he was talking to, "...uh, well it's uh, it's nice."

For the rest of the day, Billy Batson tried to figure out why his question made Clark Kent turn bright red.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I kind of stole those two flashback lines from the Short (sorry Warner Bros, haha), but lets just say that Billy hasn't been graced with powers yet. Anyways, I hope you guys still liked it. I've always liked the idea of a little boy who utters a single word, and poof, he's a bad ass superhero. And I really liked the way that they handled the characters in that short, though why kill of Black Adam? Huh?

Let me know what you thought, shoot me a review, it's dead center right beneath this gibber-jabber!

**Next Up:** I think it'll be '_Jeff the Intern_', but no promises, haha.


	69. Jeff

**Review Comments:**

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - Haha, your wish is my command.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k _**- Now that I think about it, that would have been a funny addition, but it ran so long, I left it out for a later chapter. But I promise that we will get to see how that episode ended! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - To be honest as well, I didn't know much about the character either until I watched the short. But now that I'm a little more familiar with him, I had only known over Captain Marvel and I didn't know of his alter-ego, I think I'm forming quite the soft spot for him. The short was really good, though all of the shorts were good, and I just love the idea of little Billy Batson getting the ability to turn into the powerful Captain Marvel.

**_sunset_** - You know what, you were totally right about that! Lana did say the line. That's a major slip up on my part, haha. The funny thing is that I remember thinking that Lana was unusually quiet during that scene, looks like now I know why I thought that, that's so my bad. I, however, did not miss the question about the gift that made Clark blush, haha, it will be featured in a later scene. I think I just forget to write it in the reply, haha, my bad.

I can think of plenty of jealous moments for Clark in previous seasons, and if you mean that big toothy smile, I'm pretty sure we've seen it before Lois came along. I think some of that is just seeing what you want to see, you know? Kind of like those fans that because there is chemistry between two actors that they have to be in love off the set too, you know? I don't want to say anything harsh, and I certainly don't want to sound pro-Lana, but there is little doubt that Clark was very much in love with Lana before Lois came along, and while Lois was there as well. I know that I've set chapter during Season 4 and such about "how they knew" and all that jazz, and while I think their love is something more, I have no doubts that he loved Lana very much.

That's just the realist in me.

_**A,sky**_ - Those missing moments are usually my favorites to write, haha, so I'm glad you liked it!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Haha, I hope that you like Jeff's story, though I suspect people won't like that he's less funny and more serious, haha.

Like I was telling cathy03, I didn't know much about Billy Batson either until I watched the short about him. Like Hal Jordan, Bruce Wayne, and of course Diana Prince, I wanted to introduce some of the other DC Universe main stage players into our Smallville world. Billy seemed like a great fit in that way because he could showcase how Clark might be with a child in the future for Lois to see.

_**alexindigo **_- At the time, she was important to the show. I'm glad that (at least after a while) she could serve the story well by being a key part of what destroyed the friendship between Clark and Lex (not that I didn't enjoy it while it lasted. It just had to happen eventually). There is nothing quite like that situation to burn a bridge forever, and that's certainly what ended up happening there. I too hope we'll see more couple-y activity!

_**Bookity**_ - Thank you so much, that was very sweet to say, haha. I will have you know that there is a Copy Room chapter in the works, though it'll be a key location in the 'Red-K Clark' chapter coming up. Cue the frenzy! Cue the frenzy! hahaha. And the farmhouse, well, that was covered in 'the Barn', but with that location being so prime for Clois interactions, I'm sure it'll sure that we'll see it many more times up ahead! Thanks for the review!

_**katlynne**_ - Haha, that's a lot of smiley faces, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #69, Jeff Hage, the Intern

**Author's Note: **I'm going to stab in the dark and say it takes place about nine months after 'the Bathroom', and a few hours before 'Emil'.

**

* * *

**

'_This job is a lot more interesting when Clark is here_,' mused Jeff. '_At least I get to watch him fear the wrath of Lois._'

Don't get him wrong, he loved working at the Daily Planet. Who wouldn't? But he was just a cub-reporter right now. Admittedly, that was a dream job for most past and present interns, but all the juicy stories were being shared by Lois and Clark. And with all the heroes currently occupying Metropolis, it wasn't even like there were many of those stories to go around. He was mostly left with building repairs and watching for patterns in Luthor mischief.

'_At least when I find something there, Lois takes me along for the ride instead of that buffoo__n, Olsen,_' he thought with a grimace.

He looked over to wear Jimmy was sitting. He had his feet up on his desk, eating some sort of cheese, wearing a stupid Superman shirt. Jeff grimaced, '_If I had ever been that unprofessional, I would have been out of here faster than the Flash._'

Jeff and Jimmy had quite the rivalry brewing between the two of them. Jeff had been Lois' assistant for what seemed like ages. She had made him get her dry cleaning and her coffee, occasionally sending him out on an assignment or two. Then Olsen showed up. He had been the little brother of their dead friend, Jeff had met him a few times and liked him well enough. But the little brother, it was war from day one.

He remembered the first day that Olsen came strutting in here. Must of been, sometime in 2011?

_Jeff had been waiting to hear from Lois about the Luthor story that she had been working on. Lois had told him that there might be some research that she would throw his way, and Jeff was desperately trying to impress their editor Perry White so that he could get a full-time job. That's when he heard Lois screech from the main room and his head shot up to see what was going on._

_"James!"_

_He saw Lois envelope a red-headed boy into a bear hug, Clark stood by approvingly and shook the boy's hand. "What are you doing here, pal?"_

_The boy let a large grin form on his face before stretching out his arms. "You're looking at the Planet's newest photography intern!"_

_Jeff watched as Lois threw herself at him and gave him another bear hug in her excitement. Clark rubbed the boy's hair._

_"That's such great news! Wow. Another Olsen roaming the hallways? The world better watch out for James Olsen."_

_Suddenly, Lois and Clark looked at each other funnily. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" she asked him._

_Clark smiled and nodded, "It doesn't sound quite right, does it?"_

_James frowned and looked at them worriedly, almost as if he thought they didn't want him there. "What's wrong with it?"_

_Lois smiled softly at the boy, "I think we're going to have to call you Little Jimmy, kid."_

_"Really? Are you sure? I know that you used to call my brother-"_

_"Hey. We're sure, Jimmy."_

_The boy smiled the wildest grin that Jeff had ever seen. Jeff smiled to himself as well, that meant that Perry was going to hire him full-time. Or maybe it meant he was going to fire him. Jeff started to look much more concerned. 'Perry wouldn't do that, would he?'_

Perry didn't. Instead, he gave Jeff the desk that Clark used to use before he joined Lois upstairs in their fancy office.

The dynamic duo began to use Jimmy as almost their personal photographer despite his intern status. That had irked Jeff more than a little bit, though he had to admit that the kid was good with a camera. Lois and Clark treated him like an equal, a status he had never quite reached.

It was more than just the fact that Jeff was irked by the fact that he was the favorite. They were opposites in every way. Jeff was a reporter, Jimmy was a photographer. Jeff was professionally attired, wearing a suit and tie everyday. Jimmy was almost always found in one of his superhero t-shirts and his converse all-stars. And of course, there would always be the number one reason why Jeff Hage would never enjoy Jimmy Olsen's company: Lucy Lane.

_Jeff sat his desk, typing away at a dizzying pace. He had finally gotten his big break. Lois threw him a story about Wayne Enterprises' new deal with Queen Industries. Apparently the two heads of the companies, Bruce Wayne and Oliver Queen, were going to try and pull the rug out from underneath LexCorp's feet at the last second on a deal to preserve a rainforest that LexCorp was looking to tear down for a new plant in South America._

_He didn't know how Lois got direct quotes from Wayne or Queen, but t__his was Jeff's ticket. He wasn't about to complain._

_Sitting back in his chair, Jeff observed his work. A small smirk formed on his face as he leaned back. This was going to get him upstairs for sure. And if not with the Daily Planet, than with some other newspaper. He went to take a sip of coffee, "This was going to be goo-"_

_"Bowtie!"_

_Startled, Jeff dropped his coffee onto his laptop and it spilled everywhere. He frantically tried to wipe it up with his tie and shirt, but the screen began to flicker and the keys started to smoke. 'That is not a good sign...' he thought as the computer simply shutdown._

_Jeff turned to look at the woman who had screamed behind him. She was...well, very pretty. Brown hair and greenish eyes, she looked very familiar. Not that he had the time to think about any of thought, he was too busy looking at her in shock._

_"Do you realize...you just...my whole...I can't believe...do you have any idea?"_

_The woman just stared at him, "Excuse me?"_

_"My computer! You...you made me spill my coffee...my whole article is...gone! Ruined!"_

_She looked behind him to see his coffee soaked laptop. She made a pained face, "I'm really sorry..."_

_"Sorry? You're...you're...what am I going to do?"_

_"Oh, well, look, here comes my boyfriend. He's really good with computers, maybe he can fix it?"_

_Jeff turned to see who she was talking about, and much to his displeasure, it was Jimmy Olsen. "You."_

_Jimmy's eyebrows shot up, "Me?"_

_"And her."_

_Jimmy looked over to the woman, "And you?"_

_"Your...girlfriend...just wrecked the article that I was writing. The one about Wayne Enterprises and Queen Industries."_

_"Oh..." whispered Jimmy._

_The three of them stood in silence for a few moments. "What are you guys doing?"_

_They all jumped at the sound of Lois Lane's voice, Jeff was the first to recover. "Jimmy's...girlfriend, just ruined my article."_

_Lois looked over at the woman, "Uh huh."_

_"I don't know what kind of idiot runs around screaming-"_

_"The kind of idiot who is my sister?"_

_Jeff froze in place. 'I did not just call Lois Lane's sister an idiot. I did not just call Lois Lane's sister an idiot. I did not just call Lois Lane's sister an idiot.'_

_Lois saw that Jeff was about to have a heart attack, so she decided to take it easy on him. "Do you remember the bulk of it?"_

_"Yes, but I don't have the time to-"_

_"Go up to my office and talk to Clark. He is a really, really fast typer. Good with spelling too. He'll help you out."_

_Jeff looked like he was going to pass out he was so relieved. "But next time, remember to set your autosave. We're reporters. These things happen."_

_He nodded and started to walk out of the room, "Oh, and Jeff?"_

_He turned back._

_"I know that my sister can bring out a variety of emotions. One minute I want to kill her, the next I want to pinch her little cheeks..." Lois reached an arm out to do just that to Lucy. "...but next time I catch you calling my sister an idiot, I'll pour coffee down your pants instead of on your laptop. Got it?"_

_A very serial killer-esque smile formed on her face, which left Jeff terrified. "Yes, Ms. Lane. Of course."_

_"Ok then, chop chop. You've got a deadline to meet."_

Jeff grimaced at the memory. He would always have to walk in on Lucy and Jimmy in the copy room or the supply closet, and of course Jimmy would walk around with that stupid smile when she visited. '_It was like dealing with Lois and Clark in their honeymoon stage all over again..._'

He cast a glance over at Lois making copies. She was so stubborn that she still came to work in her last month of pregnancy. That brought him back to his original thought about Clark being gone. He always seemed to disappear when he was working in the office. Jeff faintly wondered where he got off to.

Just then, he heard a screech.

Turning to look across the room he saw her leaning against the copier.

"Holy crap! My water just broke! Where's Smallville when you need him, seriously?" she shouted.

In a flash, Clark Kent was standing there and helping her walk toward the door. "Ha...ha...ha...lets get you to the hospital," he laughed.

Lois looked up at him with a loving smile, "That line never gets old..." she laughed, and then looked very serious, "...now lets have this baby."

They shared that smile for a few moments as they waddled towards the elevator. They were having a baby.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? I know that it's a little sad for Jeff because he gets kind of slighted with Lois and Clark, and for that, I am sorry. But it's kind of the way it has to go, isn't it? Unless you want me to kill poor Jeff off? haha.

Anyways, I thought it'd be fun to show Jimmy's first day on the job and how he got the nickname of Little Jimmy. I know folks were probably expecting more of a 'moments in Clois history at the Daily Planet' kind of chapter, but we'll have lots of those up ahead, hahaha. I know that Jeff might have come off as a bit of a jerk, but hopefully not. As funny as he is on the show sometimes, he was quick to be a jerk to Clark at the end of 'Masquerade' when he didn't realize that...well...that it was Clark Kent, haha. So that was kind of my idea of him, and there's no way he gets preference over Little Jimmy, haha.

Well, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review, it's that little thing right beneath the jibber-jabber.

**Next Up:** I suspect that it'll be another post-Season 10 story, though not sure what yet.


	70. World's Finest

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Oh believe me, that calm wears off right about the time that first contraction hits, hahaha.

_**katlynne**_ - No complaints on my end, haha. I too found the preview to be hilarious, I can't wait until tonight! I too appreciate that, I love those recurring characters that pop up like that. I always liked seeing Tess' aide or Lex's various guards reappearing.

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - I'm sure you've noticed that I like the 'Gulp' trick too, haha. You find out about the hospital during 'Emil', but I suppose there is always a prequel to be had there, haha. I teased about a second baby, maybe it's time to write that story, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked that Jeff was a bit jealous of everyone's favorite photographer. I probably should of added a bit about him noticed how quickly Clark appeared, but by then, I'm sure he's used to Clark showing up like that, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - It seemed like a natural way to go, haha, not everyone can be friends.

**_A,sky_** - Thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, then you'll probably enjoy this one!

**_sunset_** - I was kind of thinking about having Jeff secretly in love with Lucy, haha, because she's like a young Lois and he's been devoted to Lois for so long by this point, haha. But that just seemed to get complicated and would make it even more sad for Jeff, haha. Like I was telling h-g-j-l-e-r-k, I think that calm period ends pretty quickly, haha. I think things probably get insane by the time they hit the elevator.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #70, World's Finest

**Author's Note:** So for whatever reason, this idea just popped in my head, and I had to write it, hahaha. I hope you like it!

**

* * *

Idea:** Lois and Clark go on a double date with Diana and Bruce.

"And so she's going on and on about how she has seen heartbreak and sorrows, doesn't even realize she's drunk..."

Diana and Bruce were almost falling out of their seats in laughter. Lois was giving him a death glare, but couldn't help but smile at the same time. '_Smallville might be making fun of me now, but we'll see who gets the last laugh when we get home..._'

"...and suddenly she's up on the chair, making this embarrassing speech about Chloe and Jimmy, all just to prove me wrong. I had to pluck her up and shut her up to keep her from putting her foot any further in her mouth, and don't even get me started on the ride home-"

"Yeah. Let's not start on that...Elmer."

Clark gulped. "Yeah...lets not."

Diana smiled as Lois gave him a snarky smile. These two always seemed to have this marriage thing figured out.

"That reminds me of the night we spent in Star City...," she started.

Bruce groaned.

"...when my boyfriend was suckered into a drinking contest with Oliver. When these two get together-"

"It's a nightmare. Believe me. You don't have to explain it to me. You should see them with Jo'an."

Bruce rolled his eyes like a child. "We aren't that bad."

Lois snorted and Clark's eyebrows shot up into his hair. Even Diana didn't seem to believe him. "Don't team up with them...," he muttered.

"Don't be such an idiot."

"You two better watch it, you're getting worse than us," Lois teased. "Next thing you know, all our little friends are going to betting on whether you're dragging him off to kiss or kill him. God knows that I'm sick of hearing about it, they make me sound like a monster."

Clark puffed out his cheeks and tried to bite back a smirk. "Can it, Smallville, or I'm going to shred your plaid."

He let out a chuckle, "Then whatever would you steal from my closet every night when you feel like being lazy?"

Lois had to bite back a smirk of her own. "You're so going to pay for that later, Kent."

"Looking forward to it, Lane."

Bruce stood up, "Alright, alright, I'm going to tell the valet to pull the car around before these two throw down on the table here."

Clark stood up as well, "I'll go with you. I need to get some air."

"Look at that, Diana. World's Finest are out of their capes and playing valet for us. Where's Olsen when I need him?"

Clark rolled his eyes while Bruce frowned, "Keep it up, Lane. I'm your boss now. I'd hate for Clark to be in that big office all by himself..."

"Do it and I'll kick your flying rodent ass," she threatened playfully.

By the time that Bruce and Clark got out of the restaurant, it had dawned on him what the girls called them.

"Wait, World's Finest was their nickname for us?"

Bruce shrugged. "I thought it was what they were calling themselves."

"Me too," nodded Clark.

"I mean, they are two of the finest women in the world."

Clark's eyes narrowed, "That's my wife you're talking about. Again."

"What? It's not like I said Lois was the finest."

Clark snorted. "Well, duh."

"What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?" questioned Bruce.

"Nothing."

"Spill it, Kent."

"I'm just saying that, you know, I mean, come on. Lois is Lois. And well, Diana is Diana," Clark shrugged.

Bruce looked at him with a jaw dropped, eyes wide look. "That's my _girlfriend_ you're talking about, Boyscout!"

"Well, that was my _wife_ you were talking about...uh...Bats!"

"I'm going to kick your ass, Hick Town."

Clark scoffed, "Bring it, Rich Boy. What are you going to do? Throw a batarang at me?"

"I've got a kryptonite ring, you know!"

This earned an eye roll from Clark. "I don't see that clunky utility belt anywhere."

"Go dig up some of that blue kryptonite and we'll see who's laughing, Kent."

"Even without my powers, I'm still a country strong farmboy. You'd be crying quicker than when Bart realizes the food is gone."

Bruce glared at Clark. "I was trained by Lady Shiva, you smalltown hick. She's the greatest female fighter in the world."

"Oh, like I'm going to be scared of somebody who had to be trained by a girl?"

"What was that, Smallville?"

Gulp.

"And what was that you just said about that Shiva bimbo being the world's great female fighter, Bruce?

Gulp: Dark Knight Edition.

They turned to see their respective dates standing near the entrance of the restaurant, hands on their hips and fire in their eyes. Clark and Bruce were frozen in place and looked scared as all hell. "Truce? Because I might need your help if Lois decides to kick my ass."

Bruce eyed Diana's snarl, "Ditto."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, what did you guys think? I know that it was a bit out of character for Bruce and Clark, haha, but I like to think that on some level they were almost kidding around. I kind of picture them in a sibling kind of way. They call each other names and what not, but it's barely even an insult because at the end of the day, they've got each other's back always. So hopefully you guys can have fun with it, haha.

The actual argument until the ending was what the original idea was, I added the dinner date part for length purposes. I teased the infamous blackout that Lois had during 'Committed', but I promise that you'll see it in an upcoming chapter! haha. I know that it's one of those "moments" that has been done to death, but I figured I ought to take a stab at it. See if I can't bring some new fun angle to it? haha. If nothing else, it'll be a chapter where I put my college years to good use, seeing as how I more or less majored in Alcohol Consumption, hahaha.

Anyways, I hope everyone liked it. Shoot me a review and tell me what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking it'll be the _Copy Room_.


	71. The Copy Room

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I haven't had a jealous moment yet beween Lois and Diana, but that was the original idea for this chapter. I'm probably going to work it in at some point because I think I have a really funny idea for that particular chapter because it wouldn't have worked as well for this one!

**_katlynne_** - Right off the bat, I loved last night's episode, but more on that below! I know that Bruce doesn't drink in the comics, but come on, if Oliver Queen challenges him to a drinking contest, do you think he is going to say no? hahaha. I don't think so. Unfortunately, I've been blessed with both hispanic and irish genes, and that made me quite popular in college, haha. Nothing like "lets see what Matt's going to do tonight?" to get the party rolling, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Their sibling rivalry stuff has been popular in the comics, but I watched 'Public Enemies' recently (the animated Batman/Superman film, not the Johnny Depp movie, though I loved that movie too, haha) and I had to add it to my story, haha. They are just wonderful together! I think that he is still kind of jealous over their first meeting as well, haha. I've always wondered why they haven't played that up between Clark and Oliver...

**_cathy03_** - It really isn't fair...because I'd pick Erica Dura- errr, Lois Lane...every time, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, I have noticed that the nicknames (Clarkie-Poo, Rich Boy) have been hits so far, so I wanted to play it up!

**_sunset_** - The good news? It was Clois-rific! I don't know if you've seen it, if you haven't skip this part if not:

**SPOILER!** I thought it was going to turn out to be a double wedding with Chloe and Oliver getting hitched in addition to Clois, I'm glad that it at least turned out that there wasn't even a moment of doubt going on between Lois and Clark! **END SPOILER!**

_**alexindigo**_ - Hahaha, this one doesn't have Red-K, but the 'Red-K Clark' chapter does have copy room! hahaha.

**_Nerwen Aldarion_** - Considering the saying that you can get lost in a good book, I'm going to take that as a great compliment! haha. Hopefully I've caught your interest enough that you'll come back and read the rest, we'd love to have you! Thanks for reading!

_**clarkfan325**_ - Well, you don't have to wait any longer! haha. Enjoy!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #71, the Copy Room

**Author's Note:** I just realized that there isn't even a scene in the copy room for the chapter, 'the Copy Room', LOL. I'll make it up later, I promise!

**

* * *

Idea:** The Daily Planet staff bet on whether Lois is going to kill or kiss Clark in the Copy Room.

Kara strolled through the aisles of the Daily Planet, struggling to keep her glasses on her nose as she walked. Truth be told, she hadn't quite gotten used to her new identity as Linda Lee Danvers. At least she didn't have to wear them as often as Kal-El did.

'_Speaking of Kal-El, where was their office? Navigating ice fortresses was so much easier than earth buildings_..' she thought with a grimace.

That when she heard it.

Now, Kara had the standard super-hearing that every Kryptonian had, but judging by the way that heads popped up out of cubicles like gophers? She was willing to bet that it was her good old regular hearing that picked up Lois' delicate tones.

"We are _not_ taking in another dog, Smallville! It's completely out of the question!"

That piqued Kara's interest enough that she was willing to knock on the glass door that led to their office. The way that Lois ripped the door open and shouted "_WHAT_!" made her think twice, but then she found herself getting wrenched into the room.

"Tell him, Kara. Tell him."

Kara couldn't help but gulp. Lois was scary on her own. Vein-in-forehead Lois was like facing Doomsday. "Tell...tell him what?"

"Tell him that mutt...what the hell did you call it?"

"Krypto-"

"That mutt Krypto is not staying at the farm."

She looked to Clark's grimacing face and rolled her eyes, '_My cousin is an idiot._'

"But you love Shelby!" When he saw Lois trying to argue otherwise, he pounced, "Don't even! You know you do!"

Lois huffed, "He grew on me. It's not the same thing."

"How is it not the same thing? Because you didn't hit it with your car?" he plead.

She was thrown by how hard he was fighting her on this, but she wasn't going to sway. "Maybe you should let me try with this one then!"

Kara laughed, "He'd probably do more damage to your car than you would do to him, Lois. Krypto is kryptonian."

"Because the Krypto part didn't clue me in? Come on Kara, you know how much I have dogs!"

"You did kind of fall in love with Shelby..." she tried, glancing to see Clark's appreciative look.

"But...but...but it was one of those proximity things! Like it was with Smallville!"

Clark's jaw dropped but managed a laugh, "So you're saying that you only fell in love with me because of proximity?"

"If it helps me win this argument? Yes. That's what I'm saying," she said defiantly, hand on her hip.

"Don't think I'm not using this in every fight until the day that we die, Lois," he chuckled.

"Does that mean you're ditching the mutt?"

Clark sighed, "What if I promised to take you to every monster truck rally in North America for the next year?"

Lois narrowed her eyes, "That was a dirty move, Smallville. Dirty...dirty...dirty move."

"Do we have a deal, Ms. Lane?" he asked with a cocky smile.

Kara watched back and forth. If she didn't know any better, her cousin had just won an argument with Lois Lane.

A moment later, the whole Daily Planet witnessed a sight that, well, they wished they could call unusual. The door to the Lane-Kent/Kent office swung open and out marched Lois with an arm stretched behind her that clutched Clark's tie. Following her was Clark, and behind him stood a not-so-surprised Kara. Lois pulled Clark into the copy room, where the door slammed shut.

With a few sighs and a few head shakes, most of the staff went back to work. Some of the other employees gathered around one of the desks and began today's pool on what Clark Kent's fate was going to be, including Jeff Hage and Jimmy Olsen.

"He is so dead," chuckled Jeff as he watched Lois lower the blinds of the copy room.

Jimmy's head shot up. "Are you crazy? She's so going to jump his bones. She wouldn't care about witnesses if she was killing him."

"I've been working here a bit longer than you, Olsen. She's going to kill him."

"Well, I know them a lot better than you, Hage. She's going to go bananas on him. I know Lane women."

Jeff glared at Jimmy, "She's going to kill him!"

"No, she's totally going to swallow his tongue in a lust-drunk fury!" shouted Jimmy.

"Kill!"

"Kiss!"

"Kill!"

"Kiss!"

"Kill!"

Kara walked past the table, dropped a hundred dollar bill on the pile of cash, "She's going to rock his world...Rookies."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahaha, how was that for a copy room chapter? It seemed about the right time to introduce Krypto the Superdog, and I promise that we will have a chapter about Krypto (and here is a big hint, he won't be the only K9 in the chapter! haha). Also, it gave me a chance to show Jeff in a bit of a brighter light after that 'Jeff the Intern' chapter, I kind of felt bad about that, haha.

And on last night's episode, wowza. Hahaha. I didn't want to say too much up top in case someone missed it, so I'll talk about it here:

I really thought we were going to see the death of Chloe Sullivan, but I'm happily surprised that it ended the way that it did. Even though I'm generally speaking much more of a comic book guy, I loved the way it ended with Ollie and Chloe. If only they hadn't mentioned "Star City" as her destination, it would have tied in quite well with my 'Chloe' chapter, huh? haha. And who saw Emil and Tess coming? Hubba Hubba, hahaha. Anyways, I just watched it and I wanted to comment on it because I'm still feeling all happy inside, haha.

So after the success of meeting Bruce, Diana, Billy, and Hal (a more introduction-centric chapter is coming soon), I wanted to ask the class's opinion on the introduction of Power Girl, also known as Kara-L of Earth-2 (not Smallville's Earth-2, that's the comics' Antimatter Universe)? Her backstory will be an interesting one to explain but I was curious. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Zatanna Zatara._


	72. Zatanna

**Review Comments:**

**_alexindigo_** - Haha, you'll get your copy room/red-k fix, believe me, haha. I, of course, loved the Clois moments too! And oh god, Cassidy Freeman is just the best, isn't she? And yes, I love friendship Lollie and I don't think I'll ever forget Justin Hartley in drag. Officially one of my favorite actors, haha, not many would put on that outfit and rock it that hard! hahahaha. I loved the Batman and Wonder Woman mentions, I guess I should have had Chloe be the talent scout instead of Bruce, haha.

As far as reconciling with the comics, I've begun to just wrap up Smallville in it's own continuity aside from the comics. It's really the only way that we're going to be able to accept it. I've had a few headaches trying to make it all fit in already, haha, and it just keeps on changing (not always for the worse, lol).

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm not sure if you meant Power Girl or the Chlollie situation, haha. I absolutely adored Justin Hartley for going drag, hahaha!

**_katlynne_** - I had no idea that it was coming! haha. I was like, oh snap! And then at the end? I was laughing like a school girl, it was so funny! And yes, seeing Clark Kent drunk was epic! It's so nice to see that as I write my own Drunk Clark chapter! hahaha. Spoiler much? haha.

When it comes to getting herself a little slice of Smallville? Lois is cavewoman to the max, hahaha.

_**A,sky**_ - I promise more Shelby! haha. Look for 'Krypto', they have BIG roles in that chapter, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I know it seems random as can be to have her in that chapter, but I just missed Kara, haha. I have to imagine they have a pool, i mean, how can they not have a pool? hahaha. Even if it was just awkwardness, I would have loved to see them hint more at the Clark/Lois/Oliver thing, haha. It's just comedy gold waiting to happen! Temil was...you know what, there isn't even a word to describe how awesome it was! hahaha.

**_Bookity_** - Thanks!

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, I know right! I'm definitely going to have to use that against her in 'Krypto'! haha. My only beef with Kate Bosworth is that Lois Lane is one of those reporters that ALWAYS gets into trouble. She needs to be able to kick some ass and I'm scared I'd break Bosworth, haha. Erica Durance has that perfect blend of beauty and kick ass-ness to play Lois Lane. After watching her for six years now (please be longer! haha), I feel really bad for whoever is next because they just aren't going to rock it as well as Erica has. Superman fans have been blessed to watch her for so long now!

I wasn't a big fan of Margot Kidder either, they almost made her a little dumb for my tastes. I loved Teri Hatcher, but then again, I love her in everything, lol. I used to hate her hair color as well in the early seasons, but it grew on me. And it made the change to brunette like her version of wearing the glasses, haha.

The writers must be really big Chlollie fans or something. Or maybe Tom Welling isn't big on PDA? Because I don't remember much PDA going on between Lana and Clark, though Lois hasn't been holding back all that much, haha. In fact, I think he might have more steamy moments with Lois than he's had with any other character combined, haha. Maybe I'm wrong, just thinking off the top of my head. I've always thought their path to prominence for Chloe has been a bit unusual, but I suppose that they wanted to take a home-grown character and make her relevant?

And to their credit, DC Comics has added Chloe to the comics, though as far as I know she is just Jimmy's girlfriend so far. Though in Secret Origin there was a "Chloe S" that signed Pete Ross' cast. So who knows? haha. I know I said I liked the ending, but it did irk me that they've completely steered away from seeing Dinah and Oliver get together like they do in the comics. But like I said to alexindigo, you have to wrap up Smallville as it's own continuity. It's really the only way that we're going to be able to keep ourselves sane when trying to link the show to the comics.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #72, Zatanna Zatara

**Author's Note: **I just had an itch to write about Zatanna after watching 'Fortune', haha. Takes place kinda, sorta during 'Warrior'.

**

* * *

**

"I was wondering how long it would take you to fess up," she smirked.

He looked at her wide-eyed, '_Whaaaa..._'

"Clark, for a guy without a single pokerface, you've got like a million tells and you wouldn't look me in the eye, and you smelt like a magazine insert."

He was just a little bit thrown at that.

"Well, let me assure you that this will never happen again." She eyed him with a smirk, causing him to continue, "Lois, it's just this whole thing...with us, it's...it's new to me right now." He thought he did well until her brows furrowed.

"Yeah? It's new to me too," she told him, but the words were just a front for '_duh_'. "Do you think that I like...being insecure? I don't. I just have to get used to the reality that I'm not the only gal that thinks you're fantastic."

Clark smiled warmly, "Wow, this isn't the reaction I expected."

"Expect the unexpected?" she shrugged. And when she saw Jeff round the corner around Clark, she had the perfect example.

In one fluid motion, she dipped Jeff into a kiss. Clark's jaw dropped open, Lois counted to three in her head, while Jeff tried his best not to pass out. In an equally fluid motion she had Jeff heading towards the door and quite the smirk forming on her face.

"That look on your face? Remember how that feels the next time...one of your sexy lady friends invades your personal space."

'_Victory! Victory! Team Lane takes another one in the on-going war against Team Smallville,_' she declared in her mind.

Clark nodded and tried not to freak out, "I'm going to finish my apology now." She gave him a look to continue, so he pulled out two tickets. "At the end of the Con every year, there's a...uh...costume ball."

"You hate costumes."

"Yes...but I was rethinking what I was saying about not understanding...fantasy...and uh," he paused for a few moments. "You asked me what my dream was and it's this. With you, Lois." She looked him with a loving smile and plucked the two tickets out of his hand.

"Now that my friend...is an apology."

They shared a long look. All the things that needed to be said, melted away into one look. Their look.

"I get to pick out your costume," she announced.

He was about to say something when she pulled him from the copy room, but he figured, '_After the mess you just got out of? Just shut up, Kent._'

The Costume Ball was chalked full of...the interesting folk. Lois eyed a group to the left that would have appreciated her Storm Trooper outfit from earlier in the day, and of course the guys dressed up as X-Men would kill to have the Blur's number.

"Lois, I feel like an idiot."

She turned to appreciate him in all his glory. All of his suede brown jacket glory, "Hey there, Captain."

Clark rolled his eyes, "You didn't even like that movie, why are we dressed up like this? And how come you didn't dress up like the one girl?"

Lois had chosen a familiar outfit for Clark. Tan pants and a dark red dress shirt, brown boots and a long brown suede overcoat. He was Malcolm Reynolds from the popular TV series, 'Firefly', and it's subsequent movie, 'Serenity'. Lois donned green overalls and a flowery long sleeve t-shirt underneath.

"Because lets face it...Kaylee is just too damn shiny not to," she teased.

He looked around nervously and sighed, "Well, if it makes you happy, Lois."

She eyed him with a smirk, "The way those pants are fitting on you? I reckon I'm a mite happy, Smallville."

"Why are the so tight anyways?"

With an eye roll she replied, "They show off your backside, Captain Tightpants."

Clark had to bite his tongue, "You are enjoying this whole thing far too much, you know that?"

Lois didn't reply. "Lois?" He observed as her face turned into a frown. "Is everything ok?"

He followed her line of sight to across the room. '_Is that?...oh crap..._'

Before he could react, Lois was marching to the other side of the party. "Hey! Fishnets!"

Zatanna turned to see Clark's girlfriend stomping her way, and she couldn't help the smile that formed on her face.

"Oh, hi there, Laura."

Lois' laughed a scary laugh and bit her tongue a bit, "It's Lois. Lois Lane. And I hear that you put the moves on my _boyfriend_."

Clark was silently prayed that Lois wouldn't do anything too rash, '_Zatanna can kill Lois with her brain..._' he panicked.

"I'm sure you can understand that a woman is merely powerless against a man like Clark, I couldn't help myself," purred Zatanna.

The lack of fear in Zatanna's eyes was infuriating Lois, though Clark certainly had enough fear going for everyone involved. In fact, Zatanna almost seemed amused by Lois's anger. "Look here, Fishnets. I have no problem with morbid and creepifying, I can pull rabbits out of places that you wouldn't like."

"Lois, sweetie, Lois, maybe we could just-"

Her glare cut him off, "Never...you know, mind."

"I think it's very cute that you care about Clark this much, Lois."

Lois glared at her fiercely, "I call my fist _Vera_. Believe me. You don't want to meet _Vera_. She's a lot less cute."

Zatanna let out a chuckle but raised her hands in the air, "Ok, Lois. I promise that I won't try to..._enchant_...Clark again."

"Good," she replied. Lois gave her a nod and looked at Clark who looked so relieved he might pass out. "Because if you hit on Clark Kent one more time, I'm going to shove your magic wand somewhere that even Houdini couldn't find it."

Lady Fishnets let out a laugh and nodded her head, giving Lois an apologetic lok.

"To be honest, I was hoping that we could be friends in the future. Oliver tells me you are quite the woman," Zatanna offered.

Lois' eyebrows shot up and her jaw drooped, "Whaa...really now? He said that?"

She nodded in response, "And anyone that can cause a man to break out of my...spell? Must be impressive."

"Well, that's uh...that's nice of you to say. And modest. Kind of. I guess."

Clark decided it was safe to speak up again, "You know, Zatanna was traveled all around the world."

Zatanna nodded, "My father was a very famous magician."

"That's pretty awesome," decided Lois. "We'll have to meet up sometime and swap stories?"

"I'd like that."

Clark watched Zatanna walk off and couldn't help but feel a wave of shock crash over him. They had survived a run in with Zatanna, and best of all...

"Zatanna Zatara and Lois Lane are friends," Clark said with a sigh and raised arms, "I have done the impossible, and that makes me mighty."

Letting out a chuckle, Lois punched Clark on the arm and closed in for a kiss. "You are such a nerd, Smallville."

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that? hahaha. I finally got to throw in some of my Firefly jokes! haha. I wanted to have a confrontation, but at the same time, I wanted them to end on good terms so that we can squeeze in an epic Zatanna/Lois adventure at some point! I think a Girl's Night Out chapter has the potential to be a riot, haha. I dunno how you feel about Firefly/Serenity, but when it came time to get Clark in a costume, how could I not? haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking '_Superboy_', but don't kill me if it's not, haha.


	73. Superboy

**Review Comments:**

**_sunset_** - Haha, trust me, he will remember that statement! hahaha. I love the imagine of that cutout, hahaha. It's perfect Clois! haha. I will make sure to comment on the latest episodes, haha, since we're all in this together, hahaha. The last episode did seem to be a love or hate situation, and I did all on the side of love, haha. I think that when the cast gets to do episodes like that, they find themselves enjoying it quite a bit, haha. And shhhhhh! haha, don't give away my future Fortune-related chapter! hahaha. I think we might be on the same wave-link, haha!

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Haha, as usual, he'll enjoy either the kiss or the kill, haha, as long as it comes from Lois Lane! hahaha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k _**- Oh, it's on the way, haha. Don't worry!

_**clarkfan325**_ - My favorite kind of Clois is the kind where they are bantering back and forth, haha.

_**Katylnne**_ - You might be too lazy to log out, but I'm not too lazy to put your real name, haha. I did have a face of shock, I didn't see it coming! When they said that Tess and Emil had an 'OMG' moment, I didn't think it was a good OMG, haha. I loved that moment where he stole the Luthorcorp sign, but I loved his moments of drunkeness even more! hahaha. That was the best part of the episode for me, haha.

I'm glad that you liked Zatanna, haha, they will have a chapter together soon enough!

**_A,sky_** - I promise that you will see Lois and Zatanna in a girls night out very soon! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I don't think that Lois is afraid of anyone when it comes to protecting her relationship with Clark, haha, though I'm sure that she thinks that Zatanna is just your average magician in this one, haha. Her next appearance will take place when she knows that Zatanna is a little more than the average magician, haha, and that should be fun! I remember the Maxima spell quite vividly, haha, and it seems like Lois always seems be the key to him breaking out a spell or an enchantment, haha. And it really is all the impressive when you take in those fishnets! hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #73, Superboy

**Author's Note: **I figured I should write this before Alexander Luthor gets a chance to be renamed Connor Kent, haha. Warning, it's intense.

**

* * *

**

Connor washed his hands as hard as he could, even tearing the skin on a few of his knuckles. Blood joined the water circling the drain. Some of it was his blood, though now that he thought about it, all of it was his in a way. The blood he was desperately washing down the drain was in his own veins as well.

After a few moments, he began to let the tears he'd been holding in to fall freely. Backing away from the sink, he hit the island and slid to the floor.

"Conner?" Lois called as she rushed down the stairs. A kryptonian's fall to the floor left quiet the thump. "Conner? Are you ok?"

He didn't answer. She leaned down and looked at his hands, "What happened to you? How did your hands..."

"I was hitting someone."

Lois pulled back and looked at him in fear. "Conner, how...who were you hitting that could do this to you?"

"I...I couldn't stop myself..."

She pulled out her phone and sent Clark a '911' text. "Conner. Who did you hit? Was it a bad guy?"

He looked up at her with tear filled eyes, "Luthor. Lex Luthor."

_Conner stood alongside the security detail as the elevator rose to one of the top floors. He hadn't been to LexCorp since he and Lois broke in to find out more about his past. Since he found out he was the combination of Paul Westfield and a superhero called Superman. Emphasis on 'called'. He had been 'dead' at the time, though that had all worked itself out and when Clark Kent rose from the grave, Conner had become Kon-El and Superboy._

_With a ding, Conner arrived on Lex Luthor's floor. Walking through the door, the man in question greeted him from his desk._

_"Conner, you've arrived. It's so nice to see you again."_

_The last time these two had met, Conner had saved Clark from Lex's clutches. "I wish that I could say that same. What do you want, Luthor?"_

_"Straight to the point. I like that about you. Reminds me of Clark when he was your age."_

_Conner frowned. He still didn't understand how Lex could know Clark's secret and not reveal it. He supposed it was a card Lex held to play later._

_"How are things out on the farm? Is it still cramped and quaint?" Lex laughed condescendingly._

_"Things are fine on the farm. I've been keeping busy, as you know."_

_Lex smirked. "I could see how being a vigilante can take up your time. It certainly takes up Clark's time."_

_"What do you want, Luthor?"_

_Opening a drawer, Lex pulled out a file and walked around to stand in front of Connor. "I just thought you might want to know the truth."_

_Connor frowned as Lex dropped the file into his lap, "What is this?"_

_"In your research with Lois, you discovered that your DNA was a combination of Clark Kent and __Paul Westfield, but that isn't the case."_

___Conner dropped the file and all but one piece of paper. "This isn't true."_

___"I think you know better than that, Conner."_

___"You forged these papers."_

___Lex smirked, "I think you know better than that...Son."_

___Fury flashed in Conner's eyes as he jumped to his feet, "I'm not your son, Luthor."_

___"You are the combination of my DNA and Clark's DNA, Conner. You are as much of a son as any son could be."_

___Conner gripped the front of Lex's jacket. "I'm not...your son."_

___When a smile formed on Lex's face, Conner just reacted. With a swift swing, his punch had put Lex on the ground. Conner was concerned and relieved at the same time. He was concerned by the pain that shot through his hand, and relieved that he hadn't killed Lex with that swing._

___"I had...blue kryptonite installed...in the office when I returned," explained Lex as he rose to his feet. "I'm not an idiot, Conner."_

___His fist tightened again, "No, Lex. You are."_

___Before Conner could even realize what was happening, he was covered in Lex Luthor's blood. He had taken full advantage of the fact that he was every bit as human as Lex was in that moment, letting out every bit of anger he held for him. Lex seemed oddly unaffected by it all. He had laughed at first, and even as he grew quieter, he still managed to throw in the occasional line. "Your place is here with me. Not with him, Conner."_

___"I'll never join you, Luthor. Never."_

_Lex had begun to stand, but when he looked up, Conner was gone._

Her eyes flashed with fear at Conner's omission. "Why would you hit Lex Luthor? Conner? Why would you do that?"

"He called me his son...his son. But all that man just wants a weapon...to use against Clark."

Just then, Clark burst through the back door and saw his wife and cousin/son jammed between the sink and the kitchen island. Lois now had quite a bit of blood on her clothes, so naturally Clark panicked, "What happened? Are you ok? Lois? What happened? Where are you bleeding from?"

She swallowed, "It's not my blood, Clark."

Clark's brows furrowed, "If it's not yours...then who's..."

"Did you know?"

His attention turned to Conner, who was look at him with bloodshot eyes. "Promise me that you didn't know."

"That I didn't know what? What is this about?"

Conner looked at the ground in shame, "That I'm half a Luthor?"

Lois gasped and looked at Clark, but Clark looked equally confused. "What are you talking about? Who told you that?"

"Luthor did."

She looked to Lois in confusion, "That's not true...is it, Smallville?"

Clark frowned. This was not the first time that Lex had dabbled in creating a more powerful version of himself. Project Prometheus was the first thought that came to his mind, and the idea that Lex tried to use his DNA to make a super-Lex? He could definitely buy that.

"I don't know...but it does sound like something Lex would do. I'm so sorry Conner. I had no idea."

Conner hung his head, "I'm a Luthor."

Clark grabbed him by the arm, "No, you're not."

"Yes I am. If I'm half of him, then I'm a Luthor, Clark. You don't have to do this."

"No, you're a Kent. You are Conner Kent. Believe me when I tell you that I know better than anybody that Luthor blood isn't the poison, it's the Luthors that do that themselves. Look at Tess, do you think she's a Luthor?"

Conner shook his head slightly, "She doesn't act like one."

"Because she has chosen her own path despite who her father was. You don't have to be a Luthor if you choose not to be."

"I wanted to kill him, Clark. I had him...I could have..."

Clark and Lois shared a look, "But you didn't. Which proves right there that you're not a Luthor. You're a Kent."

They sat there like that for a long time. Lois didn't really know what to do. Conner had just admitted to them that he almost killed a man. Admittedly, the man was Lex Luthor and she'd had a fantasy or two about strangling the head of LexCorp. At the same time, as horrible as that was, she wanted to kiss Clark she was so proud. Even though Conner hadn't said a word, his face had started to lighten. Clark had gotten through to him.

"I guess that makes a lot of sense..."

Clark squeezed his arm, "I promise you, you don't have to be like Lex just because you share some DNA with him."

Conner looked up and smiled, "Thanks, Clark. And you too, Lois. I don't know what I'd do without you guys."

Lois smiled as she watched the two share a father/son kind of moment. '_I don't know what I'd do without these guys either..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? The best I could do in terms of title inclusion was that Lois is thinking about Conner almost killing Lex and then thinking about how she wanted to kiss Clark for being so good with Conner. Even though they consider each other cousins and what not, but I think there is a degree of a parental relationship between Clois and Conner. Maybe even proving to each other that they are ready for Jo'an.

I know it was pretty serious, but hopefully it still worked. And hopefully you guys still liked it. Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I suspect it will be '_Lionel Luthor_'.


	74. Lionel

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - That's something that I'll be bringing up sometime soon. I've written the final chapter of this series, and the relationships of the Kryptonian Kents plays a key role in it.

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - Thanks! I was going for something similar to when Clark was taking care of Maddie in 'Fragile'.

_**sunset**_ - Haha, that flashback was so long! I felt terrible like I was mailing it in by making it 90% flashback and 10% new stuff, haha. I thought that was the best place to start while keeping it somewhat short. Umm, I don't remember if it was in 'Isis' specifically, but it's such a Lois line that I'm sure she's said it before, haha. I would recommend watching Serenity, it's a lot less western, a lot more sci-fi.

And darkness and intensity are always around when Lex Luthor pops his bald head into things. And if it makes you feel any better, I am having serious doubts about the new Superman movie with the Kevin Costner and Viggo Mortenson talk (another villain we've already seen? come on Zack Snyder! Impress me!), maybe we will get a TW/ED Superman movie someday after all!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - That's what makes him Superman, haha. Yeah, I can't imagine how bad it must suck to be going through your life thinking you as Superman the Sequel, and then find out you're just as much Lex Luthor as you are Clark Kent. It's gotta be devastating.

_**katlynne**_ - That's really all you need to know, haha. He's got his own stuff going on, but that's the important thing to remember. 50/50 Lex and Clark. Somewhere there is a shipper rejoicing over that statement, haha. I think when we see Conner in future chapters, he might cling to Tess just because she can relate. I love Tess too, haha, and Cassidy Freeman is always a stellar presence on screen.

**_alexindigo_** - Haha, I'm still in the middle of an eight year day dream about Kaylee and River, hahaha. I feel your pain. I agree with you, like I've said before, Christopher Reeve will always be my Superman, Tom Welling will always be my Clark Kent, and there is no question that Erica Durance has put the bar at an unreachable height as Lois Lane. She's everything I dreamed of and so much more!

I plan on having Lois have her own identity with the Justice League. Especially with the women. The Girl's Night Out chapter will be chalked full of friendship-y stuff between Lois and the League. She's more than just a sidekick, I agree. It does look like Lois is the one that Conner has trapped and I'm not sure that Clark is going to be very happy about that. I absolutely adore John Glover as well, he's the best!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #74, Lionel Luthor

**Author's Note: **"It's my estimation that...every man ever got a statue made of him was one kind of sumbitch or another." - Mal Reynolds. This quote always makes me think of Lionel Luthor for some reason, maybe because I think of that quote as kind of saying that you can be a great man and have done some horrible things in your past, and Lionel fits that notion like a glove?

**

* * *

**"What's wrong, Smallville? You've been up here almost all day."

Clark turned to see Lois standing near the stairs of the loft. He cast a smile back to her, "Just thinking."

He had asked Conner and Kara to look after Metropolis for the day. Usually they went in shifts with Clark taking the "busiest" or "most chaotic" hours, but for some reason he wanted today off. April 17th. The day that Lionel Luthor was murdered by Lex Luthor.

"Yeah? What's got you reverting back to '_the Broody Days of our Lives_'?" she asked with a teasing tone.

Clark smiled, "I was just thinking about Lionel," she went to reply so he cut her off, "the original Lionel."

"Oh."

He knew that she wasn't much of a fan, but she knew that some how, Lionel Luthor had been an important man in Clark's life.

"Honestly, I'm not sure what to say here, Clark. The guy was kind of a creep."

Clark nodded with a sad smile, "I'm not going to pretend he was something he wasn't, but he had his moments..."

_He had gone to visit Lionel since his return from apparent death. Little did Clark know that it was actually Lana who had kidnapped Lionel and put him through weeks of hell at the hands of the mysterious Marilyn of the woods._

_"Lionel. Welcome back."_

_He turned around to welcome Clark into his office, "Clark," before enveloping him in a hug._

_"I'm glad you're ok."_

_"Yes, well, in the darkest hour, the soul is replenished...and given strength to continue and endure. Luthors are survivors, Clark."_

_They shared a moment of acceptance before Lionel continued. "I hear that a new member of the Kent family has turned up in Smallville."_

_"My cousin, Kara."_

_Confusion set in on Lionel's face, "Kara? You haven't mentioned her before, have you? Which side of the family"_

_"My father's side."_

_"Oh. Which father?"_

_Clark hesitated. He had come to think of Lionel as a good man, but he didn't need anymore rope than necessary. "My adopted father."_

_Something about the look on Lionel's face told him that Lionel didn't quite buy the story, but he didn't speak up._

_"Look, the reason I'm here, I came across an underground government lab. It's located beneath the silo, in Granville. You have a lot of contacts in Washington, I thought maybe you could tell me something about it?" asked Clark._

_Lionel appeared to be amused. Clark always found his way into places he shouldn't have been. "What were you doing in a government lab, Clark?"_

_"Researching a story for a friend," he replied defiantly._

_"I believe that lab in Granville belongs to the Department of Domestic Security. Tell your friend, tell her it's not a front page story."_

_Lionel had been around long enough to know that a story meant a certain Ms. Sullivan._

_"Domestic Security? I thought they dealt with terrorism?"_

_"Among other things. You know, Washington has had a weary eye on the heavens for decades, Clark. Watching for any threat beyond the stars, I've heard they call that program 'Starhawk'. They came to Smallville right after the second meteor shower. I've done everything I could to divert their attention away from you," he explained. _

_Clark advanced on him, but felt appreciative in the back of his mind. "Why didn't you say anything to me?"_

_"Your life is complicated enough. I understood they were about to leave Smallville. They found no conclusive evidence of an alien threat."_

_He stopped and thought about Lionel's words. While he wished that Lionel had been more forthcoming with information like this, he couldn't help but feel relieved that someone had his back without him even having to ask._

"...and it's not just about him. It's about Lex too. I think that was the day that I lost all faith in him. That was the day he let it all consume him. He could have been the best of us but instead...he turned himself into the worst of us..."

He turned back out to watch the sunset, Lois walked over and rubbed back for a few moments.

"You know what, Smallville?" she asked in a sincere voice. Clark looked over to her so she'd continue, "You kind of suck at picking friends."

He let out a laugh, "I didn't do so bad with you, did I?"

"Meh, you were kind of a pansy, I was the one doing all the heavy lifting," she teased.

His face broke out into a full on grin, "Heavy lifting, huh?"

In one swift motion, he plucked Lois up and threw her over his shoulder. "I'll show you heavy lifting!"

"Are you calling me fat, Mr. Kent?"

He started to laugh loudly, "Oh no, no kiss-or-kill tonight! You're not going to pull that one, Mrs. Kent!"

As he dropped her onto the couch with a thud, she propped herself up on her elbows with a sultry smirk. "I think you meant to say Mrs. _Lane_-Kent, pal."

"Uh huh, we'll see about that!" he laughed as he dived down to join her. Needless to say, the Kents were enjoying their day off.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Originally a chapter about Earth-2 Lionel becomes a chapter about Earth-1 Lionel, look at that, haha. The original chapter was eerily familiar to my chapter about Evil Lex, so I decided to change things up and go with a chapter that looked more fondly upon the elder Luthor. I know that a lot of people didn't like Lionel Luthor, but I certainly did. He was the guy you loved to hate, haha. He was the opposite of Jonathan in almost every way, and as much as I love Mr. Kent, sometimes you need that guy who shows you the dark side of the equation.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it. Like I said, I changed it from the original chapter on the fly right before I posted it, so hopefully it's still good. Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought! Your voices are what's gotten me this far!

**Next Up:** _Mera._


	75. Mera

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Hahaha, I'm sorry! The good news is that we have a long ways to go!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - It also didn't sit well with Lex because he wanted to be the one that was welcomed with open arms. He wanted to be a part of the Kent family it seemed for the longest time. Lex was always very jealous of that. I too was very excited to see him back, I was doing the happy dance when he looked into the camera at the very end of 'Luthor' and delivered his line! haha. I'm not sure what Earth-2 Lionel's fate will be.

After trying to predict that the clone, Alexander, would become Lex by the end of the show and that his line about forgetting everything would make him into Lex Luthor, only to find out that Alexander is going to become Conner Kent? I'm going to wait and see, haha. But maybe Lionel will still be around.

**_sunset_** - Haha, it has to end sometime! The good news is that we still have a very long ways to go! haha. And even when this one is over, I'm sure I'll find myself writing about one thing or another before long. Well, while he was more of a "lighter" character, I'm not sure he was ever completely "good"? If that makes sense? But in comparison to who he was in the early seasons, he was much more of a hero than a villain.

Haha, I'm glad you liked the Clois pieces. I thought you guys deserved it after the drama that was 'Superboy'. The whispers are that there will be no Lois Lane and if there is, it will be a smallish kind of role. So yeah, I'm expecting Lana Lang. And I hear no Mary Jane either in Spiderman. If their thought process is that Erica Durance can't be topped, then I'd feel a little bit better, haha. But somehow I imagine it's just them trying to get the "fresh" story.

_**clarkfan325**_ - I hope you still liked it though! haha.

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad that you liked them, I know that they weren't my usual kind of chapters. Wait no longer for 'Mera'! haha.

_**Ina100years**_ - Haha, well, he was being a pansy when he kept eyeing Lana when he had Lois right there, hahaha. I like to think of the correcting as more of one of their couple-y kind of banters, haha. Deep down, she considers herself Mrs. Kent, she just can't give Clark the win there, haha.

**_katlynne_** - I know exactly what you mean about his voice. One of my favorite things, and this is going to sound weird, is when an actor can say something extremely threatening in almost a charming way? haha. John Glover is aces at doing that! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - He does add that flare of 'gray' into the black and white world that we usually see on TV or movies. That's why I have always loved characters like Batman and Lionel and how they've portrayed Oliver at times. Things aren't always easy and fit perfect. Things get complicated and there's a lot of gray to sort through. I'm glad you didn't find her insensitive or anything like that. In fact, I didn't really picture him so much as brooding as must as just thinking about an old friend and how he impacted his life. Lois just wanted to put a smile on his face with a little tease, haha. It worked too, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Mera/AC, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #75, Mera

**Author's Note:** I know that you most of you guys have been looking forward to this one, so here it is! ENJOY!

**

* * *

**

"You realize that she's nine, right?"

Mera frowned, "I'm not sure what you're getting at."

"What I'm getting at...is that outfit is way too inappropriate for a nine year old," explained Lucy.

Jo'an rolled her eyes. '_It's not like Mom would ever let me wear it anyway! and Dad...well, Dad never needs to find out about it..._'

"It's my experience that land people often wears clothes like this," explained Mera.

"Land people?"

The munchkin's eyes nearly bugged out. "Auntie Mera lives on a boat...that's what she means...," she answered quickly.

Lucy nodded, "Uh huh."

"Besides, Orin rather likes an outfit that shows some skin."

This brought a frown to Lucy's face. "That's because he wants to make with the 'bow-chicka-bow-wow' with you. Nobody..." Lucy turned to give her niece a stern look, "and I mean nobody, Missy..." Jo'an raised her hands in defeat, "...is making with the 'bow-chicka-bow-wow' with my niece."

Mera looked to Jo'an who gave her a '_give up, she is a Lane_' look that she recognized from her time spent with Clark. "Ok, Lucy. You're probably right."

Lucy snorted, "Probably?"

Without any further fanfare, Lucy put the two piece bikini back in the rack and walked to another section.

"Your aunt is unusually conservative, are you sure she's your mother's sister?" asked Mera.

Jo'an let out a chuckle, "You should see her with Uncle Jimmy! She's my momma's sister alright!"

Mera smiled. She was all too familiar with Lois and Clark's kiss-or-kill game. It was all just foreplay if you asked her. "If you say so."

"Soooooo when do I get to come and see Atlantis? Daddy says it's amazing!" asked Jo'an with an excited giggle.

"When your mother trusts me enough to take care of her favorite treasure," laughed Mera.

The youngster frowned, "She doesn't trust you?"

"Sweetie, your mother doesn't trust anyone to look after you."

For a moment she looked disappointed, but then she let out a laugh, "Daddy says I get into even more trouble than even Mommy."

"What are you guys talking about?"

Lucy had returned with a few more sets of clothes. Jo'an and Mera shared a look and spoke in unison, "Vacation plans."

"Oh! Jimmy wants to go to Egypt this summer."

Jo'an smiled warmly, "Uncle Tweety lives in Egypt, he could show you around."

"I don't think that Carter likes to entertain guests, sweetie," laughed Mera.

Lucy frowned, "Seriously, kid. How many uncles and aunts do you have?"

"Clark Kent is a popular guy. Super popular," joked Mera. Jo'an broke into a fit of giggles, but Lucy didn't get the joke.

"You two are kind of weird, you know that?" Lucy said with a smirk.

Jo'an grabbed her aunt's hand, "But you still love me right?"

Lucy couldn't help but laugh out loud at her niece's big ole puppy dog eyes, "You're as bad as your mother, you know that?"

"Mommy says I get my puppy dog eyes from Daddy," she recited proudly.

This brought a laugh out of Lucy, "Believe me, Squirt. Your Mommy is full of it. That's her superpower, and your Daddy falls for it every time."

This caused Jo'an to break into a new set of giggles.

"When Orin smiles? I can't help but feel weak in the knees sometimes," admitted a slightly blushing Mera. "It's where all of his emotions shine."

Lucy smiled, "It's about time you started speaking my language. Jimmy wears these bowties, you know? I don't know what it is, but I cannot say no to that man when he is wearing a bowtie! It's the weirdest thing! Lois thinks I'm absolutely insan-"

"Bobo _always_ does what I want."

The two women turned to look at the little girl. "What?"

"Bobo. He always does what I tell him to do. Sometimes I have to give him '_the Look_', but he always does what I want."

Mera and Lucy shared a glance, "What look?

Jo'an proceeded to put her hands on her hips, locked one leg in front of her, and dip her head with a wide-eyed glare. Instinctively, the two women got wide-eyed and took a couple steps back. "Here...here's a quarter. Why don't you go get some candy, Squirt?"

The niece frowned at her Aunts and their odd behavior, but went to the vending machine. Lucy walked closer to Mera and nudged her a bit.

"Was it just me? Or did she look like a midget Lois just then?"

Mera's eyes got wide but she nodded quickly, "It was quite frightening."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Haha, what did you guys think? I think I'm going to write a sequel where they run into Courtney Whitmore, haha. I only had the one episode with Mera to work off of, but I like to imagine she's a bit...socially challenged with the not-so-super-powered folks of the world, haha. And I think that Jo'an would just have a ball having her little secret with all her costumed aunts and uncles when she's around people who don't know about it, haha. But that's just my experience with young folks when they have a secret, haha, they think it's just hilarious!

I already have my idea for the sequel to the sequel, haha. And here is a hint: it might get a bit magical! hahaha.

**Next Up:** I suspect it will be '_Krypto the Super Dog'._


	76. Krypto

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I think she might be a little more mature now that she is older and with Jimmy, but believe me, once Jo'an is out of earshot (as far as Lucy knows anyways, haha), she'll revert to her good ole self, haha.

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad you liked it! haha. I'm already writing two sequels for it, so you'll get to see them together again! With added company! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, the idea was that Lois and Clark got stuck at work and that's why Lucy took her out, but hear what you're saying. As for the awkwardness between Mera and Lois, I think they're probably pretty cool together. They seemed cool at the end of Patriot. Haha, I'm sure that even though they are are work, they'll be having some fun in that little office of theirs at some point, haha.

I like that notion too. Which is why I always loved his friendship with Jimmy, both on the show and in the comics.

**_katlynne_** - Haha, I had to bring back that nickname somehow! haha. And spoiler time? Carter and Shayera will be returning soon! haha. I almost had Lucy cave just so that we could have that scene, haha.

_**NonOmnisMoriar**_ - Bobo was all mygyps17's idea, but as far as I know, I came up with Uncle Tweety, haha. So thanks. In my mind, that's just who Jo'an is though, haha, a midget Lois with all of Clark's powers!

_**sunset**_ - I do have a scene with just Jo'an and Clark coming up. It's not so much a "daddy-day-out" as much as a father-daughter moment, but I think you will like it. I don't want to say much and give anything away, haha. I made Lucy conservative so that she would kind of clash with Mera, and my thinking behind the idea is that Lucy is probably more Lois-like now because of Jimmy and just maturing. But it was mostly so they would clash, haha, and that's going to get played up in the sequel a bit more, haha.

As for the new Supes movie, I meant more along the lines of in the film world? But I agree with you totally, and if you were going to do that, why wouldn't you use the Smallville Cast and make it a Smallville adaption? Think of how amazing villains like Doomsday, Brainiac, Zod, and Darkseid could be with the budget they'll have on a feature film version of the Superman story! It could be out of this world!

_**cathy03**_ - I'm right there with you about Chloe. I liked the way it happened, as my inner writer clashes with my fanboy head, haha, but I would have preferred if they didn't get married just because my fanboy-ness knows he ends up with Dinah. Then again, she was a terrible actress, haha, so I'm not going to cry any tears over her not returning to the show, hahaha.

Now that I see your examples, haha, I can agree that there is something fishy going on there. I watched 'Slumber' the other day and that scene where Lana and Clark go skinny-dipping certainly helps your case, haha. I'm not sure why the writers have chosen to make Lois and Clark so tame.

As for Firefly and Serenity (Firefly was the tv show, Serenity was the movie that was a sequel), think of Han Solo from Star Wars getting his own TV Show minus all the aliens and the force, haha. And then add it some wacky comedy to go with it, haha.

I'm glad that you like the serious stuff too. Not everyone does. I wanted to do a scene where Conner is down in the dumps and Clois helps him out, and it just seemed natural to go with that storyline. I too am surprised to see Alexander punch Clark through the barn, then again, he did have Lois trapped and Clark is definitely going to kick his ass when he finds out, haha. Oh come on! Everyone loves Uncle Tweety! hahaha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Hahaha, I'm glad that you liked 'the Look', haha. I can just see Jo'an pulling it off! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #76, Krypto the Superdog

**Author's Note:** Takes place right before 'the Copy Room', and the rest is self-explanitory. Sorry it's a little late!

**

* * *

**

"What the hell is that?"

Clark froze. "Well, it's uh...it's uh...you know...like a...well, actually it's uh..."

"It's a dog, Clark. A four legged flea magnet, no offense Shelbs," behind her, Shelby groaned, "that's currently in our house."

"Well, actually...uh, it's my uh...other family's...dog."

Lois narrowed her eyes, "If you have another family in Star City or something, I'm going to kick your ass, Smallville. And if you think that I won't call Bruce and get that nifty ring to do it? You've been hit in the head a few too many times."

Clark rolled his eyes and let out a sigh, "I don't have another family, Lois. This is Krypto, the House of El's family dog."

If she could have narrowed her eyes any more, they'd be closed. "Explain."

"Well, you remember how Kara's ship was stuck in the dam and she was in suspended animation?"

Lois didn't move a muscle but uttered, "Uh huh."

"Uh, well, my father, Jor-El, wanted to make sure that a ship could make it from Krypton to Earth, and uh, well, he kind of stuck Krypto in there to test it out for me. Anyways, he was kind of floating around space in suspended animation since his navigation system went haywire, and when I activated that beacon at the Fortress the other day, uh well, when I got there this morning, this little guy was waiting for me..."

She just stood there for a few moments, looking from Clark to the dog and then back to Clark. "Krypto?"

"You did kind of promise me that I could name the _next_ dog Krypto," he joked. She didn't look amused. "Besides, I guess the reason that name even popped in my head was because I knew him as a baby..."

Lois stared at the dog. She could believe that this _Krypto_ was the family dog on Krypton. It shared a very similar quality with Clark. It had the biggest, stupidest, pathetic, heart wrenching puppy dog eyes that she just couldn't say no to. Not that she was going to give up that easily, he knew how much she hated dogs! "I have to go to work, fly me and I'll think about it."

Clark let his smile turn into a very wide grin, "I love you, did you know that? I definitely love you, Lois Lane."

She rolled her eyes, "I didn't say yes. And yeah, I kind of figured that, what with the whole wedding and having a kid thing. Now let's go, I don't want to have to witness the _babysitter_ eating all our food again, that kid drives me nuts."

He smiled and gave her a big kiss, "Daily Planet, here we come."

As they flew up into the skies, the two dogs were left to interact. Shelby walked over and began to sniff and eyeball Krypto.

"So you're the new kid, huh?" asked Shelby in dog-speak.

Krypto stood up tall, "I am Krypto, the Superdog."

Shelby's tiny little eyebrows quirked up, "Don't get cocky, I've been roaming this farm for a long time now."

"You do look old," teased Krypto. Shelby might not have strength anymore, but the kryptonite serum had blessed him with a long life.

"I'm not _that_ old, kid. Wait until Jo'an gets home. We'll see who the favorite is."

And almost as if on cue, Jo'an came crashing through the door. "I _so_ won, Bobo! You're such a snail!"

Bart was bent over, pretending to catch his breath as he hid a smile. "You're getting too fast for your own good, Jojo." When he finally composed himself, he lifted his head and saw Krypto, "Whats with the new dog?"

Jo'an looked over and saw the white dog sitting next to familiar Shelby. "I don't know...who are you boy?"

She walked over and looked at the dog's collar and saw kryptonian symbols. "Ka...ka..kryp...Krypto!"

The dog barked at her right answer.

"How did you know that? Can you read that chicken-scratch?"

She popped her head up and glared at her Bobo, "I've been studying, mister!"

Bart threw his arms in the air, "Easy, Jojo, I was just wondering!"

Jo'an huffed and went back to petting the dog, "I wonder if he can do any tricks."

Krypto barked and made himself hover in the air for a few moments. Bart spit out the sandwich he'd been chewing on.

"What in the..."

"This is like...the bestest present ever!" squealed Jo'an.

She hopped on the dog's back and he promptly flew around the room for a few moments. Bart just watched on in awe.

"Leave it to Boy Scout to find a flying dog..."

Later on, Jo'an was relaxing on the couch and Bart was resting in the armchair after he latest buffet. Every once in a while, he would rub his stomach and let out a groan. When Krypto tried to hop up on the couch, Jo'an gently pushed him to the floor.

"No Kyrpto, this is Shelby's spot," she reprimanded him as Shelby hopped up on the couch and put his head in her lap.

Shelby looked down at Krypto with what looked like a smug expression, you know, if dogs could have smug expressions.

"Yeah, why don't you go for a fly or something..._Kid,"_ he teased Krypto in dog-speak.

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that? haha. Obviously, the scene continues for Lois and Clark in 'the Copy Room' when she has decided mid-way that she's going to make Clark fight her for the dog, haha. I like to think that the only reason she puts up the fight there is because as we see in this one, she has decided that she's going to make it hard on Clark if he wants to keep the dog, haha.

I'm not sure where the Bojo cameo came from, haha, but it just felt right. I also wanted to add Shelby as the kind of elder mentor, almost like the relationship between Chief and Copper in '_the Fox and the Hound_', one of my favorite childhood movies, haha.

Anyways, Let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking_ 'Jor-El'._


	77. Jor El

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I used to walk around doing the different character's voices, haha. My mom used to tell me all the time that I needed to pursue a career in voice acting because of that, hahaha. And I'm glad you see it that way too, haha, it is their foreplay.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, not a chance. Shelby is just too...well, Shelby, haha. Somehow I imagine that Lois doesn't like Shelby getting on the couch, so I'm pretty sure all three of them would be dead if her mother were to suddenly come home, haha. Between their natural banter and the thrill of keeping his secret, I'm sure there is never a dull moment between them, haha.

I did hear about Diana Lane, and as much as I love her, I have to wonder what they're playing at. Diane Lane looks amazing for her age, and Henry Cavill is no spring chicken from most of the pictures I've seen. She looks a bit young to play his mother. Some of us were talking about it yesterday and we concluded that she might be a flashback-oriented character for that reason. I too loved Annette O'toole and having been a fan of her ever since she was in one of my favorite Stephen King adaptions, 'IT', I was ecstatic to have her play Martha Kent.

_**sunset**_ - It wouldn't be Clois without the banter! haha. I'm still trying to sort out why Lois would ever let Bart Allen babysit her daughter, but I just couldn't write it any different, haha. He just seems like the babysitting type for some reason, haha. In the comics, Krypto's ship was blown off-course and he wandered space for a bit until he landed on Earth, but he was the test-rocket. He's had a few different origins, but that's the classic one.

I've never quite known what the deal with Kryptonian language. I just know that they have a different written language, but from all appearances, it would appear that they _speak_ english. If that's not the case, then I have no idea, haha. Kara had the benefit of learning all things human during the travel because in most of her origin stories, she had some sort of teaching thing going on in her ship during the trip. But yeah, it is a bit odd and can get pretty confusing. As for the Jor-El chapter, it's probably less serious than you're expecting, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Doggy-speak, hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - The Lionel chapter was two chapters ago, haha, you might have missed it? And yes, Batman and Green Arrow are much more of a gray situation because they aren't all powerful like Clark is and there's a lot of damaged personalities there. Green Arrow was a big social issues kind of character, so he especially had it. I hope they don't make me wait until the finale to see Shelby again, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked it! It was nice to bring back Bobo!

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - Haha, I think Lois is rubbing off on the whole Kent family! I'm glad you like BoJo, hahaha, they really are a blast!

_**cathy03**_ - I have all the movies in those crazy loud plastic cases? haha. I love Disney Movies. They are timeless! There was a moment there were I thought about, you know, how Shelby would be quite old by the time Jo'an is around...but I refused to do it, hahaha. I can't let him go, haha.

_**katlynne**_ - Oh believe me, Lucy will _always_ find something that Lois will want to kill her over. It's the curse of being the baby sister, haha. And even worse when you are Lois Lane's baby sister, hahaha. I had to make Jo'an a loyalty first kind of girl, haha. Happy Scion Day to you too!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** None? Jor-El/Lily?

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #77, Jor-El

**Author's Note: **Takes place shortly before the flashbacks seen in 'Relic'.

* * *

Jor-El walked down the sidewalk, trying to ease into his first day on Earth.

His father had sent him away on some sort of walkabout. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to learn something or if this was just punishment for being a little more rebellious than his father would have liked, either way, he was stuck here for the time being. He walked casually until he saw a woman with a stroller about to cross the street, then he noticed a car full of kids speeding their way.

In a flash, Jor-El had managed to pull the woman and her baby out of the way in the nick of time.

"Whaa...You damn kids!"

Jor-El recoiled in surprise. He hadn't expected her to yell like that. He was under the impression that humans were very passive creatures. She turned to look at him in shock, "You just...wow...uh, well, thank you...for that. I really appreciate it. Little Junior here does to."

Then she noticed his shirt was ripped, "What happened to your shirt?"

He looked down and noticed the rip. "Their automobile's rearview appendage must of caught it."

She looked at him like he was crazy.

"Rearview appen...Uh, ok, well, my name is Lily and I can't just let you walk around in a ripped shirt. Not after you just saved us."

Jor-El began to wave her off, "No, no, it's fine. Really. I'm not even hurt."

"Look here..."

"Umm, Joe."

She rolled her eyes a bit, "Of course. Look Joe, I'm not your average woman. I'm not a damsel in distress. You saved me and my little girl's life, you got your shirt ripped, the least I can do is get you a new one. Look, there's a store right here."

He ran a hand nervously though his hair, causing it to become wild and unruly.

"Ok, seriously? We've got to do something about the hair too. Were you raised on another planet?" she asked as she pulled him into the store.

Joe smiled, "Something like that."

Lily pulled him into the restroom and put his head in the sink. When his hair was soaked, she jerked him back to a standing position.

"Lean down, would ya?"

Joe did as he was told and leaned forward. Lily brushed his hair back until it was sleek and tidy. She then grabbed one bit of hair and twisted it a bit so that it fell down over the right side of his fore head, "There, that looks much better."

He observed his new look in the mirror, "I don't know about this, Lily. It looks...odd." He pushed the curl into his hair again.

Lily promptly punched him in the arm, "I think it looks good, knock it off. Now lets find you a new shirt."

She dragged him back into the clothes section and plucked out a shirt, "Here, try this on."

Joe put the shirt on and stood back for her to judge.

"Well?"

For a moment, she seemed rather taken with his appearance. But soon she was back to her teasing ways. "You won't be beating any girls off with a stick, but I suppose it will get you through the day." She walked up to the cashier, "Just the shirt."

Once they were outside, they were now left with the awkward situation of saying goodbye. Not that Joe seemed to notice.

"Well, thanks for saving us back there. I really appreciate it. I know that little Ella here appreciates it."

"Is she your only child?"

Lily looked up from Ella, "No, I have another daughter, Moira. She's visiting some of my husbands family in Hicktown, USA."

"Hicktown, USA?"

She snorted, "You're not very good at this, are you? It's a joke. It's a little town in Kansas. They call it Smallville."

Joe smiled and nodded, this woman was not like the simulations his father had shown him. She was...unpredictable. In a good way.

"Smallville? It sounds...interesting. I'll have to visit before I return home."

Lily nodded and gave him a lopsided smile, "You do that."

As Joe turned and began to walk away, she called out to him, "Hey Joe!" He turned back to her. "You look good in plaid. You look...super."

He smiled as she turned and walked away. '_What an usual woman_,' he mused fondly.

* * *

**Author's Note**: Well, what did you think? The reference was the "she seemed rather taken with his appearance. But soon she was back to her teasing ways" line since I didn't really want to imply too much. He was pretty in love with Louise McCallum at the time. For those of you that might have missed it, the woman was Lois Lane's grandmother and the mother of Ella Lane and Moira Sullivan.

I happened to watch Relic the other day and I thought, "To hell with Lana, where Lois Lane?" hahaha. I don't know why. I'm usually very easy going with the Lana stuff, but for whatever reason, I wanted to see Lois Lane's grandmother crossing paths with Jor-El back in the day. I tried to make her just as brash and Lois-y as our start reporter is, haha, but it's hard to make anyone else talk like Lois for some reason, haha. I guess I'm starting to understand what Stan Lee used to say about not being able to make Gwen Stacy say things Mary Jane would say, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Probably_ 'Hawkgirl'._


	78. MetU

**Review Comments:**

**_PhanOfDP333_** - It was just a tidbit I added because timeline wise, Shelby might not be around without that, haha. And I didn't want to do it without Shelby for obvious reasons, I love Shelby! haha. It's a different Jor-El, but when I do Fortress Jor-El, that will probably be a part of it.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I'm not going to disagree with you, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, well, we do have at least 'Earth-2 Lionel', 'the Luthors', and 'the Luthor Mansion' coming up. All of which seem highly likely to see Lionel reappear. And then there's always the chance that he shows up in other chapters, especially 'Alexander Luthor'. You never know! haha.

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - I just wanted to throw in a Lois-esque character and it seemed to fit together well, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I certainly can't argue with that. I've always liked Kevin Costner, so he gets the a-ok for Papa-K (even though my personal favorite will always be John Schneider now, haha). And well, even at 27, he looks like (to me anyways) he could be in his mid-thirties! haha. I'm glad you liked Lily! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #78, Metropolis University

**Author's Note:** Takes place sometime during Season 4, but obviously before 'Recruit'.

**

* * *

**

Lois sat in the Student Union with two of her friends, Katie and Trish. They were studying for their first exam of the semester when her phone vibrated in her pocket. She smiled when she saw who it was the caller-ID, but it was message that brought a laugh out.

**_Smallville: I haven't been insulted in a few days and I needed to get my fix. Thought I'd see how you've been._**

She couldn't help it. She had to put down her book and message him back.

**_Me: Oh you know, I'd call it boring but you'd probably call it a Rock Star life down there in Hicktown, USA._**

She knew that she ought to go back to studying, but she found herself waiting for her phone to vibrate. When she did, she let out another laugh.

**_Smallville: There's my fix. I thought maybe you were busy getting yourself into trouble again. Bad habits die hard._**

**_Me: Is that your excuse for your plaid obsession? Besides, what if I was? You going to save me?_**

He took a little longer than she had expected to reply. She assumed he just couldn't move quick enough. Then she read it again, '_I didn't mean...did I?_'

**_Smallville: Well, somebody has to do it. You've probably alienated most of your friends with your acquired taste of a personality._**

Lois let out another small laugh, '_Well played, Smallville.'_

**_Me: Are you trying to say that you're starting to enjoy my legendary charm, Kent? How sweet...barf._**

**_Smallville: Believe me, Lane, it's more like I've come to grips with the fact that I'm not going to be able to get rid of you that easily._**

For some reason, she felt herself tense at the idea of him trying to get rid of her. '_Nah, it was probably that taco from earlier..._'

**_Me: As if you wouldn't be lost without me, Smallville. Who else is going to tell you the truth about your creepy broodiness?_**

'_Ha-ha, take that you ner-_'

_**Smallville: And I suppose I should return the favor by telling you that your rabbit slippers stink something fierce?**_

_'Oh no you didn't, Farmboy.'_

**_Me: I'm going to remember that for the next time I come into town. Prepare to get your ass kicked, Kent._**

He didn't miss a beat.

**_Smallville: Is that a promise or a threat? Lol._**

She didn't know how she felt about _that_. What she did know, is that she felt disgusted by that giggle she just let out.

That's when she looked up to see Katie and Trish staring at her in awe. "What?"

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

The girls shared glances, and then Kate gave Lois a '_you can't be serious_' look. "You were giggling."

Lois' jaw dropped. "I was _not_ giggling."

"You _were_ giggling," accused Trish.

"No I...wasn't."

The two of them shared victorious expressions. "So, who was it?"

"Who was who?"

Katie sighed, "The person you were texting."

"Nobody."

They laughed, "So it was a boy."

If they didn't know any better, Lois might have blushed. _Might've_. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Spill it, Lois. Was it that frat-jock? What's his name?"

"Coop?" offered Katie.

"It was not Coop," defended Lois.

"Come on Lois, that guy practically worships the ground you walk on!"

Lois sighed, "Fine. If it's soooo important to you...it's just this guy that I know from this hick-town right outside the city. Happy?"

The duo giggled in excitement, "Could this be the mysterious guy that has kept Lois Lane from playing the field at Met-U?"

"Yuck, no. He's just...I don't know, he's just Smallville."

Katie frowned, "Smallville?"

"It's what I call him. It's just...it's just our thing."

"So you have a thing?" teased Trish.

Lois let her head drop back in exasperation, "No, we don't have a thing. He's just this guy that annoys me like no other."

"But you text him?"

"I don't..._always_...text him."

They didn't look convinced.

"I don't! We just kind of...text each other when we want to insult each other."

Katie bit back a laugh, "And how often is that?"

"I don't know! I don't really keep track of it. Maybe a couple times a week?"

"It sounds to me like you have a thing for the guy," offered Trish.

Lois let out a ragged breath, "I do not have a thing for him. My cousin has a thing for him. I can't have a thing for him. End of story."

"But maybe your cousin would understand?"

"My cousin once went a month without talking to me because I borrowed her barbie. Believe me. There is nothing going on between me and Smallville."

They decided to drop it at Lois' angry tone and went back to studying.

But when Lois received another text and giggled, she yelled, "Oh shut up, you two!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? haha. I wanted to do something that hinted but didn't go too far, haha. I'm going to continue to tell myself that Lois wouldn't chase Clark because she didn't want to hurt Chloe, and Clark didn't chase Lois because his brain was still fuzzy from getting reprogrammed by Jor-El, hahaha. It's one thing that I won't apologize for, haha, I was rooting for it the second she appeared in 'Crusade', haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Probably '_Hawkgirl_', I wanted to do it for this one, but '_Met-U'_ got done first, haha.


	79. Hawkgirl

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Anytime you have someone noticing Lois' hotness, especially in an innocent way, I love it, hahaha.

**_katlynne_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked the Joe and Lily dynamic. I wanted to show a possible generation skip in Lois' snarky ways, haha, since it kind of seems like Ella was a sweetheart. And I wanted to show a little call back to the Superman curl, haha, it had to start somewhere! haha. And I'm glad that you liked the Lois flashback, I wanted to tip-toe the line between implying and hinting, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - It sure was, hahaha. It was kind of unfortunate that it had to be Lana, haha, because that's a iconic Lois and Clark thing. I'll review 'Scion' down below. Hahaha, I kind of wanted to show a different side of Lois. A more girly, pure flirting kind of side. I could see how sexting would make sense, maybe I'll incorporate it into the Red-K Clark chapter, haha. I think that was my reaction as well, I was like, "HELL YEAH!" haha.

**_clarkfan325_** - I think we'll see it at some point, haha. I left it open for later, hahaha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, all this sequel talk is starting to make me want to right one! hahaha.

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - There were times and comments that Lois made during Season 4 and 5 that made me think she thought that she _couldn't_ be with Clark, even if she wanted to. She really felt like Chloe wanted him, and that was enough for him to be off limits.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm not sure what to call it either, but I sure love it! haha. I thought she was gorgeous in 'Scion' (the bulk of my review is down below), but she is always beautiful, haha. Like I was talking to LoisNClark4Ever, I can't imagine it being an origin story with Henry Cavill. He's not exactly young looking. I'm betting they play the Kents via flashbacks, but you never really know. Maybe the Kents found him when they were pretty young. Cavill is 27.

I have plenty of chapters ready to go, so hopefully we can get through this last stretch together! haha. Red-K Clark is nearing, and we'll be seeing Preggers Lois in the 'Stargirl' chapter. Lionel has quite a few potential chapters coming up, so you won't have to wait long! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, the Hawks, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #79, Hawkgirl

**Author's Note:** Takes place a while after 'Carter' when Jo'an knows Carter better. I think she's probably a bit older too, but not in her teens.

**

* * *

**

"Great wedding. Great wedding," chimed Carter. "Good kids those two."

Clark nodded and joked, "Yeah, doesn't hurt I got some practice walking a bride down the aisle for when Jo'an get's married."

Jo'an looked up at her father with a goofy smile, Lois just rolled her eyes. "I can't wait for someone to take this monster off my hands."

"Don't kid yourself, Lois. I've seen you protect her as fierce as an Amazon," quipped Diana.

"Yeah, Mommy. Don't kid yourself, you looooooove me," teased Jo'an.

Oliver picked her up, "You better watch it, Joey, I'm not sure your army of me can face the wrath of Momma Kent."

"Lane-Kent. Is it so hard for you people to remember _eight_ letters? Do I call you Papa Sullivan?"

He smirked at her, "Is it so hard to call _him_ Clark?"

Clark raised his eyebrows, "Don't involve me in this. I'm quite fine with you calling me Smallville, dear."

"You better be," she warned him with a smirk before giving him a kiss on the cheek.

Carter roamed over with Shayera, "Young love."

"Isn't it all young love to you, Big Bird? Aren't you late for your shift as the crypt keeper?"

Chloe nudged Oliver with a smile, "Could you be civil for five minutes? I swear, between Bruce and Carter, you're such a pain."

"It's all part of my charm, Chlo" he teased back.

Bruce snorted, "Don't get too ahead of yourself, Queen. I think Chloe is doing the heavy lifting in the charm department."

"Don't get too cocky, Wayne. I believe it was _my_ charm that got us out of trouble last week with your League of Shadow friends?"

"I have no doubt you're the reason we got out of trouble, Diana, but I can think of two big reasons, and neither was your charm," he replied cheekily.

The table laughed as Diana swatted him affectionately. Lois was laughing but covering the ears of a confused Jo'an. '_I can still hear, Mom..._'

"You two are worse than me and Smallville, you know that? You stole our game," joked Lois.

Bruce smirked from across the table, "Only in ours, there's a lot more kissing and a lot less killing."

"I don't know about that, he spends more time with Robin than me," teased Diana, causing the women around the table to roar with laughter.

Chloe decided it was her turn to tease her man, "I know what you mean, sometimes I wish I was a bow, I might see some action!"

"Hey now!" laughed Oliver.

"Maybe if you spent a little more time with your wife and a little less time with your arrow, you'd avoid a scorned woman's wrath," teased Carter.

Oliver narrowed his eyes but a smirk formed on his face, "This from the guy who's been spending a couple lifetimes playing with his mace?"

"Don't be so mean, Uncle Ollie," warned Jo'an.

"It's okay, Joey. He has a thick skin from all his years, he's older than your Grandpa Lane," teased Ollie, Jo'an glared and climbed into Carter's lap.

She squeezed Carter tightly and snapped, "I don't care if he's older than the Gramps. I love my Uncle Tweety."

Carter blushed lightly, causing most everyone in the room to go, "_Awwwww_."

"Did he just blush when she called him Uncle Tweety? Did you guys see that?" Ollie's eyes bugged out of his head in shock. "He *bleeping* blushed!"

Lois quickly threw her cup and hit Oliver in the head, "What the hell, Legs?"

"Don't swear in front of my baby, you idiot! Do it again, and I'll break your little..." she looked at Jo'an, who was giggling, "..._arrow._"

Oliver's jaw dropped as he rubbed the side of head for a few moments. Suddenly, he pushed his chair back and he gripped his shin in pain.

"Boy Scout! Why?"

Clark smirked, "Don't call my lady Legs."

Oliver was leaning back in his chair rubbing his shin furiously when Carter gave the chair a nudge and sent Oliver toppling backwards, causing the table to turn and look at him. Jo'an formed an 'O' with her mouth and clamped a hand over it to hide her smile. Carter shrugged.

"I just felt like it."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? hahaha. Poor Ollie, hahaha. Oh, and poor you guys, haha. You didn't even get to find out who's wedding it was! hahaha. I feel like such a jerk, but a little suspense is good for a fan base! hahaha. I'm going to be posting a chapter very soon that will take place at the rehearsal dinner that will reveal the lucky couple, and here is a hint: they did not appear in this chapter. hahaha.

Even bigger hint? There's some red kryptonite, a fist fight, and some new Uncles and Aunts we haven't seen yet! haha. I think you guys are going to like it quite a bit, it has a pairing that's often requested as well! Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _the Fortress of Solitude._

**'_Scion_' Review (Spoiler Alert):** I really loved it! I kept waiting for Conner to kiss Lois, and I'm glad that they didn't. It would have caused an uproar if she had with some of the fans because they can't handle that kind of thing, and it was nice they avoided it while keeping it on point. And I loved that they left Conner to have better days, because he could be the next TV show with guest appearances from the gang, hahaha. Maybe a Teen Titans show? haha.

I loved all the scenes with Tess. She was great in this one. But my favorite part was Lionel meeting Darkseid. I'm predicting that he has a huge hand in bringing Lex back, and that just makes me very excited because it seems likely to happen soon! haha. Can't wait for that!


	80. Fortress

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Close, but no cigar, haha. I was probably misleading when I said it involved a pair that gets quite a few requests, that pair isn't necessarily the pair that is getting married. I have a whole list of ideas, haha, so there won't be an end anytime soon!

**_A,sky_** - I was a little worried because the banter was a little more adult-oriented than usual, haha, so I'm glad you liked it!

_**LoisClarkNLove**_ - Well, they were talking about how their respective partners are a little _busy_ when it comes to certain things, hahaha. I thought it might be appropriate for Lois to at least try and shield her baby from it, haha. I loved the whole Tess/Clark interaction as well, and as always, Clark manages to pull out a gem to make us all swoon for Clois, haha.

I think that somehow we'll see Lionel do something or give something to Darkseid, and he'll raise Lex from the dead somehow. In the comics, Darkseid could create life, so I'm thinking maybe that's what we'll see. Or maybe he just corrupts Alexander to the point of breaking all Kent ties?

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - I'm glad that it didn't bother anyone by the content it led to, haha. And the fact that there was so little Hawkgirl, hahaha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - Thanks! I'm just so happy that mygyps17 lets me use her!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #80, the Fortress of Solitude

**Author's Note: **I don't really have an exact point in time, just in a time before Jo'an knows she is kryptonian.

**

* * *

**

"I'm not so sure about this..."

Clark frowned, "Lois, it was your idea to tell her."

She shot him a glare but bit her tongue, "That was before the day got here, Clark. This is huge. What if...what if she can't handle it?"

"She is Lois Lane's daughter. She can handle anything."

Lois lit up for a second before she tried to play coy, "You must really like me, huh Smallville?"

"Something like that."

He pulled her close and she pretended to try and get away. "Knock it off, Farmboy. I'm trying to be worried about my daughter," she giggled. But he just snuggled closer into her neck and caused her to lose her ability to stand on her own. "You don't sound too worried."

Lois rolled her eyes, "You're going to be the death of me."

"Smothered by kisses?" he teased.

"Something like that."

Clark let one of his rare cocky smiles grow on his face. '_I just turned Lois Lane into putty in my hands..._'

Before he could do anything more, he heard a small cough from behind him. Both Lois and Clark froze where they were, tangled in one another. Lois buried her face into Clark's neck, horrified at what she knew was standing in the entry way. Clark peeked over her shoulder.

"Hello, Jo'an."

Jo'an had an amused look on her face, "Daddy. Mommy. I thought today was going to be _my _special day?"

Lois groaned, "Nevermind. She can handle it. She's a pain. Just like her father."

"I was thinking about something along those lines, but it wasn't that she was like me," he teased.

She punched him in the shoulder and walked up the stairs, "Would you just go see Father Frosty already?"

Clark laughed and gave her a quick peck on the forehead before leaning down for Jo'an to hop onto his back. He opened the door about part way when Lois shouted down, "And make her wear her coat. On the off chance she _can_ get a cold, I don't want another near death experience with a barn door."

"It wasn't even close to you!" he laughed.

"Coat!"

Jo'an giggled and climbed down to get her jacket out of the closet. "Where are we going today anyways?"

Clark got down on one knee and looked at her with a loving expression, loving that she looked more like her mother each day.

"We are going to a very special place. To meet a very special man. And have a very special talk."

She frowned at him for a moment but then smiled widely, "Are we going to see Chuckie Cheese's?"

The pair rushed to the Kawatche Caves, where Clark opened up the door to the stone altar. Jo'an looked absolutely mystified as her father opened up walls and revealed an octagon key from his pocket. "Now, I need you to trust me, ok? Don't be afraid."

She nodded, unable to reply.

Clark smiled a small smile as he pushed the key into the slot on the altar. As the room brightened, she grabbed his hand. "Just hold on, sweetie."

In a flash, they were in the Fortress of Solitude. Jo'an gasped at it's beauty and magnificence. Clark led her towards the center of the main chamber and knelt down beside her. After a few moments, she turned to look at her father in awe, "What is this place?"

"Sweetie, have you ever wondered why you're so fast? And so strong?"

She frowned at him, "It's because my daddy is Superman, duh."

Clark let out a laugh, "Ok, let's try this differently. Have you ever wondered why I'm Superman?"

This question seemed to stump her, so she just shrugged her shoulders. "Not really."

"Well, it's because I'm not like everyone else. I'm like Aunt Kara. And we're from a very special place called Krypton."

This caused her to look at him with a funny expression, "Is that in Africa? Mommy went to Africa once."

"I know that Mommy went to Africa once," he chuckled. "But Krypton was much further away than Africa is."

"Are you sure? Because Africa is _really_ far away."

Clark struggled to keep a straight face, "Jo'an, Krypton was a planet."

Jo'an snorted, "That's silly. That would mean you're an alien!"

"Sweetie...I _am_...an alien."

She didn't appear to know what to say about that, she started to walk circles around Clark. "Does Mom know about this?"

"Yes. Mom knows." He frowned, trying to tell what she was thinking.

"Does that mean Grandma is an alien?"

Clark shook his head, "No. Grandma and Grandpa Kent found me when I was a baby. They were my adopted parents."

"But...what happened to...what happened to your alien parents?"

It was Clark's turn to frown.

"They died. Saving me. Our planet was in trouble. They wanted me to be safe so they sent me to Grandma and Grandpa Kent."

This was a lot to take in for a little girl. "That's really sad..." She rushed over and gave him a hug.

"It is," he whispered into her hair. "But Grandma and Grandpa found me. Mom found me. And we made our own family."

Jo'an looked up and smiled at her father, "You made me!"

Clark pulled out one of those megawatt smiles and hugged her tightly. "Are you ready to meet your other Grandpa?"

Her nose scrunched up, "Huh?"

Clark smiled and stood up, looking around the Fortress. "Jor-El, are you there?"

Jo'an looked at Clark like he was crazy, "Uh...Dad? We are the-"

"I am here...my Son," boomed a voice from above.

Her eyes nearly popped out of her head, "What was that?"

"That is your Grandfather...Jor-El. He programmed himself into this Fortress to look after me. To look after us."

Jo'an tried to take it all in, but Jor-El spoke up once more. "Jo'an Kent, you are the youngest of the House of El. Welcome home."

She got very wide-eyed and cocked a nervous smile, "Thanks...Grandpa Jor-El."

"I detect a nervousness in your tone, do I frighten you?"

She shifted nervously in her place while Clark wondered where his father was going with this. "A little," she admitted.

The room began to rumble as the crystals shined brighter. Jo'an looked to her father with a glimmer of panic running across her face, she began to walk his way when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked back to see a man standing in a white robe, the Superman symbol his chest.

"Jo'an...you need not to be afraid."

She looked up at him in awe, "Are you...are you my Grandpa?"

Jor-El looked up at Clark with a small smile, noticing his surprise at his father's current form. "I am."

"How?"

"I have the power to present myself in many forms. I felt that this would be the form you would find most accepting."

Jo'an looked back at Clark with a sly smile, "He talks funny."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? I wanted to leave it on a light hearted note, haha. It's kind of a serious chapter, hence why I made sure to give you guys some heart warming stuff at the beginning, haha. I honestly haven't even begun to imagine what happens next here, haha, but I imagine Jo'an is going to break down Mr. Frosty with her usual charm and turn him into mush, the Gramps style, hahaha. Grandpa Frosty perhaps? haha.

I wanted to write a chapter where Clark explained their origins to Jo'an. I figured this might be one of the ways that he would go about doing it and would introduce her to her grandfather via the Fortress. He showed warmth in the middle-ish seasons at times, so I imagine him being warm to his only granddaughter. Especially since at this point, Clark has reached his destiny as the world's greatest hero.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I haven't decided yet. I have a couple on hand, but they mostly have Jo'an and I was thinking about spacing those ones out.


	81. Jor El Fortress

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Hahaha, I'm not even going to lie, I'm a little proud of that moment. Haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_NonOmnisMoriar_** - Haha, I suppose that she could! I know that Lois might have liked to do just that in 'Abandoned'!

_**sasslady**_ - Aww, that's really nice of you to say! haha. And yes, I try and make her as midget-lois-y as I can, hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - It's a surprise for later! hahaha. And yes, I realized that right after I posted the chapter, hahaha, whoops! I originally had only written the last half or so when I came up with the idea to make it into the 'Hawkgirl' chapter, and that's when I got the idea to have a teaser opening, and somehow I completely forgot to make it Shayera related! hahaha. Just a big mental whoops on my part, I'll make her a big part of another chapter to make up for it! haha.

Haha, yeah, I figured some people wouldn't like it very much. I was worried about it taking up valuable time in the last episodes, but I can kind of see why they did it because it reaffirmed that Lois and Clark's relationship has grown to the adopted-parents stage. Still, I would have preferred for it to have come in the earlier episodes. Maybe it'll lead into a show where the main Smallville cast guest stars, anyone else hoping for a Teen Titans show? hahaha.

What has you so worried about the promo? I'm super excited to see Jonathan Kent return, in whatever form. I'm very excited to meet Booster Gold and the return of the Fortress is long overdue. Is it the 'dearly beloved' thing? Because I'm sure that's for Earth-2's Oliver Queen.

I agree that Jor-El doesn't have a cold heart and all of his non-AI appearances indicate that full on. He was a great man as a clone and an equally good man on Krypton. The computer version just makes him a bit cold, but not always. The computer has had it's moments of warmth.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I wanted it to feel like a big moment while keeping the usual Lane charm of being able to handle everything, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #81, Jor-El (Fortress)

**Author's Note:** Takes place during the Season 9 Premiere, 'Savior'.

* * *

Despite his attempts, Jor-El could tell that something was not right with his son. His focus was not there and there was something...new...yet familiar on his mind. Dominating all of his thoughts. Clouding all of his vision. Something that Jor-El had felt before.

"Kal-El, my son. You are distracted. When you decided to return to your training, I assumed you were ready."

Clark turned to fire back. "I've been coming here for weeks. I've done everything you've asked, why are you questioning me now?"

Jor-El could almost feel the weight around his son's neck.

"Until today, you had focus. You had cleared your mind and heart of those who had kept your tethered to the human realm."

"If there is anything that's keeping me tethered, it's that I still can't fly. Have I not earned the same powers that Kara has?"

"Your powers lie within you, Kal-El. Your physical composition is no different than your cousin's."

A moment of clarity set in for Clark, "So you're saying it all in my head?"

"You still see yourself as a human."

Jor-El could sense the defiance growing within him. "You're wrong," he declared. "I gave up everyone I cared about. I gave up everyone who's important to me. I wear the symbol of our family everyday to remind me that I have a different destiny."

"Perhaps you tried to move on too quickly. The test of a true hero is to struggle with feelings of loss, and to overcome them...not to avoid them. Something or _someone_...is holding you back," replied Jor-El in a knowing tone. He knew what his son was struggling with.

For a moment, it looked like Clark did as well. But he quickly shook it off. "No. I've come this far, and I'm not looking back. I can do this."

Jor-El granted his son's wish and let him begin another one of his mental trials. Right about now, he should be on what human's refer to as the Statue of Liberty in New York. He should be attempting to fly, but Jor-El knew that he would fail as long as Lois Lane dominated his mind.

_Martha Kent had entered the Fortress and demanded his help. Kal-El had been banished to the Phantom Zone and it was now up to Martha Kent to save the human race from Zod. He had been explaining his intentions and his plan to Martha Kent when he noticed the other._

_Lois Lane._

_Being of an unimaginable power, Jor-El was capable of maintaining multiple focuses. He scanned Lois Lane to determine her condition. She would live after adequate attention for the human medical facilities. So he took this moment to observe the human his son had such a strong connection with._

_Kal-El shared a powerful connection with this Lois Lane and she often neared the forefront of his thoughts. As Jor-El took a moment to scan her, he came to the realization that she felt the same. There were many complicated human emotions, including one the resembled an affection and annoyance almost simultaneously. Perhaps he would never entirely understand the human race..._

_He also gleaned that she was currently having a hallucination about Kal-El in her unstable state. Jor-El was only able to see flashes of her hallucination, but he could tell that it took place in what human's referred to as a barn. And it appeared that they were...rolling in the hay._

**_"I'm going to kill you, Smallville."_**

**_Kal-El was trying to crawl away. Jor-El noted that he was hiding his powers from Lois Lane. "Shelby needed a toy!"_**

**_"Those were my favorite slippers, you moron!" she shouted as she pounced onto his back and pulled his hair._**

**_"Ouch! Lois! That's my hair!"_**

**_Jor-El did not understand at first. Kal-El would not feel pain. But he realized Kal-El chose to pretend for her sake._**

**_"You needed a haircut anyways! Something more manageable would suit you. Maybe with a curl?"_**

**_Kal-El rolled her over so that he was now on top. "So. You have been checking me out?"_**

**_Lois Lane rolled her eyes, a sign of annoyance amongst humans. "You wish, Smallville."_**

**_"Maybe."_**

**_As he lowered his head for a kiss, she raised her own to meet him._**

_But before they could meet for the kiss, Jor-El transported them back to the Kawatche Caves in Smallville._

"Isn't it time to move beyond these mental trials?"

If Jor-El could have let out a sigh and hanged his head, he would have. "Your determination is strong, my son. But just as your passion will be your greatest strength, so too will it be your greatest obstacle."

"Jimmy died because of me, and I can't afford to let another mistake like that happen," replied Clark. He could feel the guilt weighing him down. For a brief moment, he thought that was what his father was referring to. "You sent me here to fulfill a destiny. Tell me what you need from me."

"Kal-El, you do not need me to _tell_ you what is standing in your way, you already _know_. And you know what you need to do."

Clark accepted his words and realized what he believed he needed to do. "I have to say goodbye to her."

But as Jor-El watched his son speed out of the Fortress, he couldn't help but feel like he was the one failing a trial. A _parental_ trial.

"No, Kal-El...you need to go home to her..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? I always thought it was a bit weird the way talked about what we assume is Lois Lane during 'Savior', and I'm going to pretend like this was why, haha. Even as the Fortress, Jor-El has shown compassion and warmth to Clark from time to time. So I wanted to make him seem a bit more friendly than he has been of late. Kind of in line with how he was in this last chapter as well.

And to avoid confusion, that was a dream Lois was having. Not a flashback. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Not sure, it'll have to be a surprise!


	82. Supergirl

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, I wanted to soften him up a bit. I'm glad it still worked!

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I'm always down to pretend Lois was the main story in any episode! hahaha. I'm glad you enjoyed the dream! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It does seem like a Lois thing to say, doesn't it? As if texting each other just to insult each other was normal? haha. I'm glad that I was able to bring back the Carter/Oliver dynamic, haha. It's always fun to write that. It was especially fun to work in Bruce and Diana into the gang. And since you guessed right on the wedding, I had to post the chapter! hahaha. I wasn't sure anyone would guess, I was going to tease it for longer! haha.

As much as I loved Tess and Emil in 'Fortune', when we see her again, she'll still be with Hal, haha. The Christmas Colors Couple, hahaha. I haven't decided whether to have Perry and Martha together long term, part of me likes it while part of me knows that Ben Hubbard might make more sense. And of course there's always the fans that prefer for her to just be alone since Jonathan was her one and only...who knows, haha.

I'm glad that you liked Jo'an and Clark's day together. I'm thinking about expanding upon it. Maybe having them test out some of her powers. I'm really glad that you liked the warmer Jor-El. No matter how many times I say that he showed warmth in the middle seasons, I still know it's probably out of character to have him be that warm. Even if Clark has lived up to his destiny. I can't wait for 'Kent' either! haha. I'm going to die waiting!

_**sasslady**_ - I have a line that I used in another story that I've always been fond of where Jor-El says that the Kents raised Clark to have such a big heart that his Kryptonian heritage alone couldn't fill it. Implying that it will be his human side that will be a big part of who he is. I think that goes hand in hand with him possibly wanting to see him and Lois together because perhaps he can sense how much his son needs her?

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad you liked it! haha. And yeah, I thought her dream ought to be kind of her perfect moment of sorts? haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Nope, not Jucy, haha. But I think I'd be lying if I said that a potential Jucy wedding isn't on the list, haha. I kind of love it when anybody calls anybody by their special nickname for that person. It just shows a personal connection with that person. I love it! haha. I hear that Oliver won't be in 'Kent' but he'll be in the one after it, so we'll have to wait at least one more episode.

I'm glad that you liked it, haha. And given the way that Lois has dealt with big surprises, I thought her daughter ought to be up to the task. I like to think of Jor-El the way that he was as a clone in 'Kandor', because that was a real hero. He protected his son even in his death, and he hadn't even met him. And I'm going to say 'no comment' on the Lana stuff to avoid being strung up by any Clana fans, hahaha, but we know where my allegiance lies! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bart/Kara, Chlollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #82, Supergirl

**Author's Note:** It's a little long, but I don't expect you guys will mind, haha.

**

* * *

**

The Kents and Queens met with Kara and Bart outside the restaurant. They had arrived a little early to help with setting up.

"Congrats, Kara. And hey, just think, you didn't even have to hit him with your car," joked Lois.

Kara let out a giggle while Bart grinned widely. "She'd have to catch me first."

"Like I've ever had a problem catching you," quipped Kara.

"That's just because I'll let you catch me anytime, Beautiful."

Lois watched the two exchange cute little looks and wanted to barf. '_Were me and Clark ever that bad?_' Don't get her wrong, she liked Bart. Emphasis on the "ed" there. She had even been the one that suggested the two of them go out.

But after seeing the brat with her brat, almost everyday? Well, she saw enough of him as is.

"Ok, ok, keep it in your pants, Speedy. You've got plenty of time to do that after tomorrow, got it?"

Bart and Kara exchanged embarrassed looks, Kara even reddened a little bit.

"Oh, wait, that reminds me about something. Will you grab Jojo while I run back home real quick? I got you guys a couple of presents."

She smiled at his mysterious nature, but nodded. In a flash, he was gone and when he came back with two small boxes, Jo'an looked very excited.

"Presents!" she squealed.

She tore open her box and found a beautiful necklace with a red gem pendant. "Bobo! It's so pretty!" She launched herself at him and hugged him to the ground, Kara watched on in delight as she opened her own box to find a matching necklace.

Bart put on each other their necklaces, not noticing their eyes flaring up as he did so. "We should probably get everything ready for the dinner."

"Yeah, come on, Bart. Let's get this over so we can get to the good stuff," winked Kara.

Bart scrunched up his nose at the sight. That was very...unlike Kara to say something so aggressive. "You okay, babe?"

He turned to see if Jo'an had thought it was as odd as he did, and that's when he saw the worst glare he'd ever seen from the youngster. "Jojo?"

"What are you looking at, Pip-Sqeak?" asked Kara to Jo'an.

Bart's eyes nearly bugged out his head at her tone. Nearby, Lois spit out her drink. Clark glanced at Chloe and Oliver, they were just as shocked.

"He's _mine_, Aunt Kara. All mine."

Kara let out a mocking laugh, "What would he want with a little girl like _you_, when he can have a woman like _me_?"

"Oh no you didn't, _bitch_."

Jo'an and Kara began to circle each other with snarls.

"What the hell is going on? They're acting so...so...savage. Jo'an Lane-Kent, knock that off right this instant!" Lois offered.

Clark noticed something in Kara's eye and a thought occurred to him. "Honey, you didn't let Kara borrow any of your..._lipsticks_, did you?"

She frowned at first, but got his meaning, "I keep that under lock and key, you know that!"

"Wait, you kept that?" screeched Chloe.

Both Lois and Clark paled considerably. "You two probably play Robin Hood and Maid Marion, don't judge us!"

In a flash, Jo'an had launched herself at Kara and tackled her to the ground. Much to everyone's surprise, Kara didn't hold back as she launched Jo'an across the room in a rage. Jo'an retaliated by punching Kara, hard enough to draw blood.

"Oh, you are going to regret that, you little Lois midget!"

"Hey!" chimed Lois.

Clark rushed in to try and break them up, but Kara knocked Clark across the room with one swipe. "Stay out of this, Kal-El!"

Just then, Wally West and Barry Allen walked in the door. "Is Bart's fiancee smacking around a little girl?" asked Barry.

"Either that, or Bart got some awesome entertainment for the rehearsal dinner," quipped Wally.

Clark dusted himself up and walked up behind them, "If I distract them, do you think you can get their necklaces off?"

Both Wally and Bart stared at him for a few moments, but they knew better than to argue with Superman. And as soon as they came off, Kara and Jo'an were back to normal. Completely embarrassed, but normal. Kara took off in one direction in embarrassment, Jo'an the other direction.

"Now _this_ is a party," joked Wally.

Clark found Jo'an sulking in the loft by herself, still wearing her dress from the rehearsal dinner. "Sweetie? You ok?"

"I ruined Aunt Kara and Bobo's big night..."

He knelt down beside her, "Honey, it wasn't your fault. They know that. Aunt Kara was infected too."

Jo'an didn't say anything for a few moments. She just stared at the floor. "I bet they hate me."

"Sweetie, they don't hate you," he told her gently. "They could never hate you. They love you to pieces, you know that."

She looked over her shoulder to see if her father brought reinforcements, but when she heard her mother still in the house, she leaned down to whisper to Clark as if her mother was the one with super hearing. "But I said that _really_ bad word that Mommy says about Ms. Grant..."

Clark couldn't help it, he let out a laugh.

"It's not funny, Daddy!"

"I know, Sweetie, I know. I'm sorry."

Jo'an got really quiet again, which allowed them to hear a creak near the stairs. They saw Kara standing there, obviously embarrassed. Clark gave his daughter a kiss on the forehead and made his way out of the loft. Kara walked over to sit down. They sat in silence for a bit.

"I'm so sorry..."

Kara looked up in surprise. She came to apologize to Jo'an, not the other way around. "Jo'an, you don't have to apologize."

"Uh huh! Yes I do! I ruined your big dinner, and Uncle Wally and Barry probably hate us. And...and you probably hate me now," she whispered.

"Sweetie, I don't hate you," Kara went to give her a hug.

Jo'an turned away, "But I tried to steal Bobo away from you."

Kara picked her up from behind and walked over to the couch where she sat with Jo'an in her lap. "Well, he is _your_ Bobo, Jo'an."

She turned quickly in her aunt's lap, but then tried to play it cool. "He's not _mmmmyyyyyyy_ Bobo."

Kara let out a laugh. "What if he is _our_ Bobo? What about that?"

Jo'an pretended to think about it for a few moments. "How does that work?"

"Well, how about I get him for now, and when he's all old and slow, you can have him?" teased Kara.

"He's already too slow!" giggled Jo'an. "What if you get him when I'm in school and I get him after school?"

Bart and Clark sat on the stairs near the top of the loft, listening to the two of them negotiate the terms of their settlement.

"You know what? I must be some kind of lucky, Amigo. She's really something, huh?"

Clark smiled, "You better be talking about Kara. I'm not ready to walk my baby down the aisle just yet."

"Woah, woah, woah," laughed Bart. "Slow down now, Boy Scout."

"I never thought I'd hear you ask _me_ to slow down," laughed Clark.

As Bart looked up at Kara laughing in the moonlight with Jo'an, he smiled warmly. "I never thought I'd have a family."

Clark followed his line of sight and looked back with a smile. "You do now, Amigo."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I got this idea ages ago to have Jo'an and Kara duke it out over Bart, haha. And it was important to introduce Wally West into the story because there is a significant chance he will be a main character in my next _story_ (not chapter, mind you) alongside a few other...errr...young...justice-y...types, hahaha. Including Conner Kent and some dude named after a bird...haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked the chapter! Originally, I had intended for Barry and Wally to have bigger roles. Maybe even introduce Iris West, Barry's wife and Wally's aunt. Barry and Iris are Bart's grandparents, which feels so weird to say, haha. I'll probably do another chapter that covers more of the reception we saw in 'Hawkgirl'. Possibly make up for Shayera's serious lack of appearance in 'Hawkgirl' in the first place, haha.

Let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, but I'm thinking it will probably be '_Halloween_'. No promises though! haha.


	83. Hubbard

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Hahaha, it's all good. I knew that I was risking it with that line, haha, but I wanted to at least give _some_ kind of hint, haha. I'm glad that you liked the kinky Clois moment, hahaha. I've seen a lot of the Lois-inducing Kal stories, and I've always thought it was a hilarious idea. There isn't a thing about Lois Lane that would suggest that Clois has boring..uh...you know...fun, hahaha. I'm glad you liked the Clark/Jo'an stuff, I know that I haven't shown that side all that much, so I've been trying to make up for it lately.

_**Katylnne**_ - Haha, you know me a little too well, don't you? hahaha. I know that some people probably didn't like that line, but I always think it's funny to see a little kid say something shocking like that, haha. It is kind of funny because way back when, I was going to have Chloe end up with Bart but found myself swayed by some of the Chlollie shippers and recent episodes, haha. Now, I kind of think his personality with her's would be too cute, haha.

And I'm glad that Grandpa Frosty worked for you. I really liked him when he appeared in 'Kandor', so it's been kind of my little side-mission to show a new side of him. Both with Jo'an and in response to Lois, so i'm glad that it worked out so well, haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I could just see Lois jumping out of her seat and Clark having to talk her off the ledge, haha. "She was on Red-K, Lois. She didn't mean it." - "Well, she's about to be on a red-ass, Smallville. My daughter isn't a midget-me." - Ollie snorts. hahahaha.

_**PhanOfDP333**_ - A 'Power Girl' chapter is in the works, she'll be making an appearance in another chapter first and then an origin-esque chapter. I kinda of was going to go for the comic book origins with a Smallville twist, but I'll keep the Lindsey Harrison thing in mind. You made a lot of great points. And come on, we're all nerds, haha. We're (and in my case, writing) Smallville fanfiction. Nothing wrong with being a nerd, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, they have been paired for a while. At least I think so? haha. Haven't I had them together before? I can't remember now, haha. Either way, I'm glad that you liked it. I think they could be quite the cute couple since she's so literal and he's so goofy, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Maybe they were keen on killing each other and then kissed and made up? haha. I know it's a stretch. I forgot to make the title reference, haha. I'm glad you still liked it though, haha.

**_s01itaire90_** - I've had that idea for ages now, haha. And I'm glad that you liked the lipstick bit because it was a little racier, which is usually my bread and butter, haha. I really loved getting to write that exchange in 'Hawkgirl', haha.

_**A,sky**_ - I figured that everyone would expect Clark to be the infected one, haha, I'm glad that I surprised you! haha. We never get to see Bart in a more heartwarming setting, so I really liked writing that bit. And I liked getting to reference Cat Grant again, haha.

I do have an idea for a more chronological story that would see Superboy, Robin, Kid Flash, and Wonder Girl in the main roles with the usual gang filling in as guest stars in each chapter. But I won't start that story until I finish this story unless I get a sudden big idea or something, haha. I'm glad that you sound excited about the idea, haha. I've been nervous about topping this story.

_**alexindigo**_ - Yep, though I'm not sure what to call them, haha. And I've been thinking about the whole idea of Jo'an having someone in her life, and I have to say, whoever comes up with that story? Is going to have comedy gold on their hands, hahaha. I'll have to keep an eye out for someone to bring in! haha.

I'm probably going to post it within the next couple chapters, haha. The problem with a Red-K Clark chapter is that it's a really popular character and I've only got once chance to do it right! haha. But I think I have a pretty good idea for it, so it should be a good one, haha. I definitely hear you about Chlollie, and I have to admit, Justin Hartley's performance has gone a long way towards me warming up to the pairing. And yes, I'm the Captain of Tease, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #83, Ben Hubbard

**Author's Note: **I went to post this and realized I already had a 'Halloween' chapter! hahahaha. I must be losing it! Luckily, it was an easy title change!

**

* * *

**

"Now that I see it...I really don't want to wear it."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Are you serious? It was your idea, Smallville."

Clark looked down sheepishly, "I didn't think she was going to remember. Can't Oliver take her?"

"Clark, you are her _father_! Do you really want to have your sidekick take your daughter out for Halloween?"

Oliver mocked offense, "Hey!"

"Shut your face, Robin Hood. Grown ups are speaking."

Chloe patted Oliver's head in comfort, "Don't worry. You look very handsome in your tights, Honey."

Oliver dropped his head onto the table, "They aren't tights!"

"Lois, do I really have to? Would she really be _that_ upset?"

In a flash, Jo'an was standing in the kitchen wearing her outfit. Arms stretched out and a wicked smile, "Ta-da!"

Lois turned back to Clark with a smirk, "I don't know, Smallville. What do you think?"

If he hadn't been too busy laughing at his daughter's timing, he would have groaned and dropped his head alongside Oliver's.

Clark Kent and Jo'an Lane Kent walked up to Ben Hubbard's in full costume. He was lagging behind his skipping daughter, who was absolutely ecstatic about her favorite holiday. He, on the other hand, was absolutely embarrassed to be wearing-

"A Donkey Kong costume, Clark?" laughed Ben. "That's uh, quite the outfit you've got there. A full gorilla suit too."

Clark let out an embarrassed laugh and fiddled with his big red tie, "Yeah, well, Lois showed Jo'an show of her old video games, so she wanted to be Dixie Kong."

Jo'an giggled before taking off her pink hat and bowing before Ben, "Donkey Kong is the coolest, Mr. Hubbard!"

"Well, isn't that just the cutest thing?"

She grabbed onto Clark's hand and pulled it a couple times, "Do the voice! Do the voice!"

"Jo'an...I don't think Mr. Hubbard wants to-"

"Come on Smallville, do the voice for your daughter," someone called from behind.

Clark turned around to see Lois Lane lightly jogging up to Ben's front door. She was dressed as Candy Kong, wearing a bikini top and Daisy Dukes. Clark's jaw dropped as he observed the enormous amount of skin that Lois was showing, especially her legs.

"Ooo-ga ooo-ga," he muttered dreamily, still entranced by Lois.

Lois smirked at him and pulled his big red tie until his face was close to hers, "You better believe it, Mr. Kong."

They shared a kiss until Ben coughed behind them. Clark turned to him, blushing furiously, "Sorry, Mrs. Kong is a bit demanding."

"Lane-Kong, Smallville."

Ben watched the couple with a smirk, "Here Jo'an, I better give you some candy so that your parents can get home."

She looked up at her neighbor with a confused expression, "We're going to a trick-or-treat carnival in Metropolis, Mr. Hubbard."

He looked at his watch, "It's getting pretty late for Metropolis isn't it? It's already seven."

Lois and Clark exchanged nervous glances but Lois managed to cover Jo'an's mouth before she could say anything else.

"You're right, Mr. Hubbard. I guess we let time get away from us. I guess we'll be going then," she ended lamely.

Ben frowned but waved goodbye all the same. The Kents began to walk away from their neighbors and when Clark saw the Ben was heading out back, he quickly picked up Lois, "Hey kiddo, I'll race you to the Daily Planet...and remember-"

"Don't let anybody see me, I _know_ Dad," she told him with an eye roll before tearing off into the sunset.

Lois prepared herself for the whoosh that never came, "What are you waiting for?"

Clark smiled at her and kissed her deeply. When they came up for air, she was looking at him with a wild expression, "What's gotten into you? Your daughter is going to be stranded in Metropolis all by herself."

"I like to let her think she is faster than me," then he smirked, "besides...ooo-ga ooo-ga."

Lois smiled up at him and kissed him deeply when Jo'an appeared again, "What's taking so long? Mom! Dad! Can't you kiss another night?"

The couple broke apart and looked at their daughter with smirks, "We better go, Smallville. Your daughter is going to kill us if she doesn't get her candy."

Jo'an rolled her eyes and raced off again towards the Daily Planet.

As Clark readied himself and Lois for the journey, he laughed. "I don't know why you call her _my _daughter like that. It's a Lane thing to wanna kill the ones you love. I'm all about the kissing," he told her with wagging eyebrows and a Lois-trained smirk.

Lois let out a laugh, "Well, if you want any kissing later, get your buns of steel to Metropolis. Pronto."

He rolled his eyes and prepared himself to jet into the sunset. '_She isn't getting out of kissing tonight. Not with that outfit._"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. Donkey Kong Country has been my personal crack for ages, and I was playing it the other day and was wondering if they will ever make a live-action movie, and then I thought it would just be hilarious to imagine Tom Welling in a Gorilla suit for some reason, hahaha. Seemed like an obvious choice to have Jo'an as Dixie Kong and Lois as Candy Kong.

I fully intend to have a sequel where they meet up with some super-hero friends at the Carnival, haha. I bet you guys will fun speculating about who that might be, haha. Just think of which characters might fit in a Carnival type setting, haha. I can't believe I forgot that I already had a Halloween chapter, lol, I feel like such a dork now. Anyways, luckily I included Ben Hubbard in the chapter and I can get away with it! hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Watchtower._


	84. Watchtower

Review Comments:

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hints of Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #84, Watchtower

**Author's Note: **Takes place shortly after Season 10, but after '_Wonder Woman_' for obvious reasons.

**

* * *

**

Lois rolled over, reaching an arm out for her fiancee. It fell against the mattress with a thump, causing her to just barely open one eye and notice that Clark was gone. She groaned something incoherent and pull the covers over her head. That is, until she felt fingers on her feet.

She bolted up and looked at the foot of the bed where Clark knelt and tickled her feet.

Naturally, she pulled her feet up away from his hands. She had to turn and put her face into the pillow to keep her grin from him. Needless to say, she was happy that she was wrong in _this_ case. Clark was still home. Lois began to talk, face in pillow of course, causing Clark to crawl up to her.

"What was that?" he laughed.

Lois twisted her head to look at him, "I thought you were gone."

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Lois. But I do have to head out to Watchtower in a few minutes, Bruce is bringing the new recruit in today."

She tried to hide her disappointment, but she ought to have known better. Clark nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck, "But I do have a few minutes before I have to go, you know?" he asked with wagging eyebrows and a wild smirk.

Lois' face nearly split in two as she threw the covers over him, "My Superman..."

Walking into Watchtower a few hours later, Lois Lane had a big ole grin on her face and a cup of coffee in her hand. She was having a good day. She saw most of the gang huddled around the table in the back and heard...was that...moans?

"I can't believe this! This is freakin' awesome!" shouted Bart.

Oliver was dancing with hands in the air, "Kick his ass, Princess!"

Lois frowned, '_What the hell is going on now?_'

As she worked her way past various superheroes and superhero-aides, she saw her fiancee. Arm wrestling. And after noticing his opponents top and how low it went and how much cleavage it revealed, she couldn't help but add, '_with some bimbo in a tiara_.'

She noticed the sweat on Clark's brow, '_Clark never sweats, what the hell is this girl doing to him?_', and the strain of the muscles in his arm. He wasn't just goofing around. Not like he did when he arm wrestled with her and always let her win. This woman was giving him a run for his money. She almost felt a little sexist for being surprised that a woman could contend with her Smallville, but how could you blame her?

She didn't even know of many men that could do it.

With a slam, Clark barely beat the woman. The woman was smiling at him, but her eyes were glaring.. "I don't like to lose."

Clark looked up in surprise, but quickly formed a smirk, "If I had let you win, I would never hear the end of it. I'm still hearing it about the cape."

The rest of the group swarmed the woman before they could continue their conversation. Clark looked up and saw Lois. He got to up to walk over to her and had to lift his t-shirt to wipe the sweat off his brow, '_Don't let his abs distract you, don't let his abs distract you!_' she demanded of herself.

"Hey! I didn't know you were going to stop by today," he told her before giving her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Lois nodded, "Yeah, Perry wants me to get the scoop on Superman, so I figured I'd come see my Super-Fiancee."

Clark smiled warmly. Ever since his debut as Superman, their editor had been hellbent on getting the scoop about Superman. Clark had spent many an afternoon wondering just how Perry might react if he realized the Man of Steel was actually just down the hall.

"So...who's the babe?"

He frowned and looked back at the gang and then back at Lois, "Oh, Diana? That's the new recruit."

Lois narrowed her eyes, "_That's_ the new recruit?

"Well yeah, you remember that string of vigilante justice we'd been hearing about in DC?"

She barely moved her lips, "Uh huh."

"That was Diana."

Lois watched as _Diana_ awkwardly conversed with Oliver as Clark explained her origins. She faintly heard him say something about some Amazons on an island, an invisible jet, and the Greek Gods or something. "She's awful pretty, don't you think?"

Clark frowned, "What?"

"Diana. She's awful pretty, don't you think?"

He cast a glance over at the Amazonian Princess, "I guess."

"You guess?"

Clark looked back at Lois, who was giving him her Lois Lane patented '_innocent-glare_' look. It was a look that told him that she wanted the right answer in a short, simple, and timely manner or else she was going to kill him. Get it right, and she was going to kiss him.

"She's pretty, I guess. Tall, brunette, big-" She gave him the '_not-so-innocent_' glare, "-eyes. Eyes. I was going to say eyes!"

Lois crossed her arms with a huff, so Clark decided to pull out his trump card. "But she's just not my type, Lois."

She couldn't help it, "No?"

"No. I like a certain quality that I've only ever seen in one woman."

Lois did her best to look away and seem uninterested in what he was saying, but of course, Clark knew better. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I like, well, I love, a girl that makes me feel like I can do anything. Like I can fly." She smiled a shy smile. "And I have only ever met one girl like that, Lois. And it's you. And you..." he stepped closer to envelope her in a tight embrace, "...are the most beautiful woman in the world."

She did her best not to fall down. Her knees had gotten, well, a little weak? So she wrapped her arms around his neck, which, hey. It opened up the opportunity for a very, very satisfying kiss that caught the attention of the League-Men and caused them to whistle and howl at the couple.

As Clark set her back down on the ground, she noted with a satisfying smirk, '_Look at that. I've still got it._'

"Get a room!" hollered Bart, which caused Lois to whip her head around and glare at him, "You know...if you want," he added sheepishly.

Diana walked over towards the couple, and Clark gave Lois' hand a little extra squeeze of encouragement to keep her from being too icy with her.

"Hi, you must be Lois?" she offered with an extended hand that Lois shook. "Clark here hasn't stopped talking about you since I got her."

Lois noted with a smirk that he was blushing lightly, "Yeah, I've got him trained pretty well."

"It looks like it," laughed Diana. "Hey Clark, did you see where Bruce got off to?"

Clark used his x-ray vision to look for him in the upper deck before spotting him, "He's upstairs. He's not one for group events like this."

Diana looked surprised, "Rich Boy? Not a group guy? Could have fooled me. All he does is talk, a bit on the annoying side."

"And yet you want to go find him?" questioned Lois with a funny expression.

Diana looked even more surprised but couldn't help smiling a shy smile, "Yeah. Weird, huh?"

Lois watched as Diana walked up the stairs and saw Bruce meet her near the railing. She also watched as the two laughed and...flirted? Lois watched as Diana flipped her hair casually and flashed a bright smile here and a bright smile there. She also noticed that Bruce seemed to turn of his inner-broodiness and seemed to be genuinely laughing with the Amazonian Princess. Clark snapped her out of her thoughts.

"So, is everything ok? You know, with you and Diana?"

She snorted. "Oh, believe me, Smallville. That woman has _no_ interest in you," she laughed.

Clark frowned and smile in confusion. He didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but with Lois by his side, he really didn't care.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I know that there's been quite a few requests to see a jealous Lois, so I thought I'd make her jealous of Diana up until she notices that Diana has a thing for Bruce, haha. That way we can have them friends like we have them later on! haha.

As far as timeline comes into play, I got ya covered, haha. Based on '_Diana_', Chloe and Bruce were together at Lois and Clark's wedding. By the time that '_League_' comes in, Bruce and Diana are together and Oliver is with Dinah. Oliver and Dinah will kind of get together in a chapter called '_Dinah_', which ought to be up any day now, that takes place after the scene we have a flashback to in '_Oliver_' where Chloe and Oliver breakup. I'll just set the 'Dinah' chapter pre-wedding but post '_Watchtower_' since I think that right now, Oliver and Chloe are still together since Bruce is single, otherwise Lois would kill him for trying to cheat on her cousin. Whew, headache over, hahaha. I want to put these in order someday, hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking '_Hawkman_'.


	85. Hawkman

**Review Comments: (I don't know why I didn't have my Watchtower replies, must not have saved them. Sorry!)**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Hahaha, I hadn't decided on costume for anyone else just yet besides the ones we run into at the Carnival, haha. I'll have to put some thought into that, hmmmm, haha. I won't lie, I had the 'look at his face' line chiming in the back of my head when I wrote that little bit, haha. It's like her weakness is Clark's body parts, hahaha. We won't even go into emphasis on that, hahaha.

**_meg_** - He'll be back in the 'Legion' chapter.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, it's going to be a bit of a job, but I'll sort it all out. And yeah, I still have the original Nintendo consoles, and I play Donkey Kong Country all the time when I'm bored, haha. My favorite has always been Super Mario World though, best game ever! haha.

I love having the two of them together as well, haha. They're such strong personalities and I love myself a strong female character! haha. It is a shame that they don't get more screen time. I recently watched the Wonder Woman animated film, and it was stellar! Highly recommended!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - He is definitely out-numbered, haha. I almost want to make Conner live there full-time so that he'd have some backup, haha. Even then I think they'd fold to Lois and Jo'an, haha. And I'm glad to hear you're still reading! haha. Look how far we've come! haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Hahahaha, I should have used that line in the chapter! haha. And yes, there will be a Zod chapter. In fact we will have two chapters featuring the infamous Zod. One will be '_General Zod_' and take place when Lois and Clark were trapped in the Phantom Zone, the other will be '_Major Zod_' which will feature the Zod we had throughout Season 9. I loved Callum Blue's performance as well, also Terrence Stamp in Superman I and II.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, which costume would you have preferred? haha. Maybe I'll work it in special for you! haha.

I'm glad that it hit the spot! haha. I know that people have asked about seeing Jealous Clark a lot, but Jealous Lois just seemed like the perfect fit, doesn't it? haha. She's so territorial sometimes! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - What did you need me to pull strings for? For more Jo'an stories? haha. I'll see what I can do! And oh boy, now I'm going to have to look over my shoulder to make sure I'm not getting stalked or hounded! haha. I promise to post Red-K Clark soon, like within the next five chapters!

**_katlynne_** - How could he not? haha. Lois Lane in Daisy Dukes? Brings new meaning to Oliver's nickname for her, 'Legs', hahaha. And come on, Erica Durance has some stellar stems, does she not? hahaha. I think you'll like the Carnival chapter, haha, a fan favorite will appear! haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Aww, that's kind of the perfect thing to say! haha. I'm glad you liked their bit where he reassured her.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Carter/Shayera

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #85, Hawkman

**Author's Note:** Flashback courtesy of Season 10's '_Shield_', the actual scene is the sequel to '_Shayera_' and '_Carter_.'

**

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**

"So...you kissed Carter?"

Lois cringed. She had been trying her best to avoid the topic. "I...it...it's not what it sounds like."

Now, Lois didn't know this, but Clark really didn't care one way or the other. He knew Carter well enough to know that he wouldn't have made an actual play on her. He also knew that they were talking about something that happened nearly twenty years ago. This was purely for fun right now.

"So, you didn't kiss him, then?" he asked innocently.

Lois flinched again. "Well, I kind of did. But it was more like he kissed me. And it wasn't really that he was kissing me. It was Shayera."

"Shayera?"

"Well, he thought I was Shayera. He was kind of...it's kind of a funny story actually..."

_The tent was hot and dusty, but Lois was so caught up in her talk with Carter that she could barely tell. Or maybe it was the booze._

_"It feels like somehow I was destined to be with Clark, but his destiny is so much bigger. And the last thing that I would ever want is to be the one thing that holds him back or stands in the way," she offered as she tried to reason with bolting to Egypt._

_Carter didn't seem convinced. "And what if you're exactly the thing that might help him be the person you know he can be? What if you're the one that makes his burden easier to bare?"_

_Lois felt taken aback at this alternate explanation. "Do you think that's why he sent you? To make sure I was safe?"_

_Carter had to hold back a laugh. 'That's exactly why. Boy Scout practically begged him.'_

_"He worries about you. He still thinks you don't know about his powers."_

_"See? That's another reason for me to be here. When it comes to big secrets, I'm not exactly Mata Hari. I could blow it all for him."_

_Carter frowned and looked away, "With every great relationship, Lois, comes a great burden. And the strength to carry it."_

_'I really wish this guy would stop poking holes in my master plan here,' she thought to herself._

_"Ok. Well, I better get my beauty sleep. All this dry heat..."_

_"Lois."_

_She turned back to see him walking her way, she gave him a curious look as he plucked up an old book._

_"I'd like you to have something. It was given to me by my wife. It's a story, about two star-crossed lovers. Prince Khufu and Shayera were murdered by an evil man, but their love was so strong, they were bonded for all eternity. Lifetime after lifetime they were reborn, to find their one true love."_

_Lois smiled. It sounded romantic._

_"Only to lose each other in death again."_

_Lois frowned, 'Well that's a bit less romantic than I was expecting.'_

_"That's a terrible story," she told him before making her way out of the tent._

_Carter gave her an amused smile, "I like it."_

_"If you're into the whole Egyptian groundhog day thing?"_

_"After so many years, Khufu grew tried of always waiting to find his beloved. So he traveled the world. Seeking other women. Trying to forget Shayera. Unable to rid her from his heart, he returned home resigned to his fate. No sooner did he arrive at the palace when...he saw her."_

_Carter looked up at her and Lois noticed a kind of dreamy look in his eyes. 'Uh...'_

_"She was there all along, but he didn't recognize her because the time wasn't right."_

_Lois frowned, 'He better not be thinking what I think he's thinking...'_

_Carter took a couple steps her way, Lois' eyes got wider and wider with each step. "He needed to wait. Because it made their love stronger."_

_She was becoming more and more uncomfortable with each step._

_"And their kiss that much sweeter," he told her before leaning in to kiss her._

_Now, you can blame it on the alcohol for getting the drop on her, but Lois Lane did not take long to react and she slapped him something fierce._

_"Try that again, and the next thing kissing your lips will be my fist," she threatened._

_Carter watched as she stomped out of the tent, 'Clark was right. She is quick to jump from kiss to kill.'_

"And it was just a kiss! I swear it."

Clark continued to sit on the edge of the couch, arms crossed. He made a dramatic sigh and frowned. Lois wanted to die. '_I wonder how much longer I can get away with this before she realizes that I'm not mad? I wonder if she'll put on the Stiletto costume if I play this right..._' he pondered.

He shifted on the edge of the couch, "It does sound like you were drinking, Lois."

"I was! But not, I mean, you know that I'm a good drinker. I wouldn't have done anything rash because of that!"

He tilted his head from side-to-side, "There was the night of Chloe's rehearsal dinner..."

Lois's eyes narrowed into a glare, "How dare you bring up the-night-that-must-not-be-spoken-of."

"I'm just saying. You got a bit out of hand that night..."

"Do you really think I could have felt anything, Smallville? Really?" she asked, her eyes begging for him to forgive her.

Clark couldn't help it, he was starting to feel awful about teasing her this bad. '_Stupid morals_' he yelled at himself. Walking over to her, Clark pulled Lois into his embrace and gave her a sweet kiss. "No. I don't think you felt anything and I don't think you have anything to apologize for."

She gave him a funny look, "You are evil, you know that?"

"I learned from the best," he teased.

She laid her head on his chest and they stood there for a moment before she pulled back to look at him.

"You were trying to hold out for Stiletto, weren't you?" she asked with a devilish smirk.

He tried to look innocent for a few moments before breaking into a grin, "Can you really blame me?"

Lois rocked back and forth on her heels, "I suppose I could reprise my role if you promise to wear the cape?" she purred in an english accent.

Clark threw her over his shoulder and whooshed them to their bedroom so fast that Bart Allen would have been jealous.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? hahaha. I kind of figured that Clark would be much more likely to toy with Lois than actually be upset with her. And I always kind of wondered what Lois' face look like during that scene with Carter, haha. There's a lead-in to this chapter in the 'Queen Tower' chapter that will come up here in a bit, but I haven't written it yet (well, the whole thing), so I figured I'd post this one first.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking it will be the '_Living Room_'. And uh, well, let's just say it's an iconic off-screen scene, hahahaha.


	86. Living Room

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you like it! haha. I'm a sucker for an english accent, so I'm kind of forcing Clark to be like me, hahaha. And yeah, I can't really imagine Clark getting mad. Especially not when he's been off sucking face with Zatanna and Maxima and a few other women during his courtship of our favorite Daily Planet Reporter, haha. You still have to let me know what costume you're looking to see! hahaha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I'm not sure he has to guilt her into either! Lois is a little too fond of her costumes not to be willing, hahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - I'll see what I can do, haha. The thing about mygyps17 is that deep down, she is a Chlark fan and writing the Clois story isn't really her top thing to write about. But I'll see what she says, haha. I love all the little moments between Clois too! That's one of my favorite things about the show is that you get to see those personal relationships that take a backseat to the villains and Superman-ness that you see in the comics and past movies. And it's no secret that I absolutely love the way Erica Durance and Tom Welling have brought Lois Lane and Clark Kent to life, especially together.

Haha, I can't promise twenty years of story, but I'm already very excited about my new story that I'll be writing after 'Kill Me or Kiss Me'! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - He has his moments of smooth, haha. And I agree. Diana is absolutely beautiful, and easily one of the most beautiful people in the world with some amazing abilities. But Lois Lane is Lois Lane and Clark Kent wouldn't change a thing about her, haha.

It was a long time coming with that kiss talk, haha. I couldn't figure out how to make it a whole chapter, and then I thought "why not combine it with the 'Shield' flashback you already want to do?" Sometimes I'm an idiot, hahaha. It's so obvious now! But yeah, it was always my idea to have him try and use it to talk her into something and after the response I got with having him con her into the Stiletto outfit in 'Evil Lex', I had to bring it back! hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #86, the Living Room

**Author's Note:** Takes place during 'Committed', I suspect you'll figure it out quickly, hahaha. It's a long one guys! Enjoy!

**

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**

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," chanted Clark. "Why doesn't this shower get any colder!"

After a few more minutes of standing in the cold shower, thinking about Baseball, Clark decided to give up.

"I'm going to the Arctic to do snow angels in the nude," he muttered as he super-sped out of the bathroom.

**Two Hours Earlier. . .**

Clark walked through the screen door and into the kitchen, was Lois currently latched onto his back. "Mush, Smallville! Mush!"

"I'm not a dog, Lois," he told her in a serious tone despite the grin on his face.

Lois let out a loud laugh, "You wish you were as cute as Shelby!"

Almost as if on cue, the furriest member of the Kent Household came running down the stairs with a wagging tail. Lois hopped off Clark's back and raced over to the dog. Not even twenty seconds in, Lois was sneezing. "I don't care about my allergies. You're just the cutest, aren't you! Aren't you, Shelbs!"

Shelby rolled over onto his back and allowed a sneezing Lois to scratch his stomach, "If only I could train you _this_ well, Smallville."

Clark grinned a toothy grin, "Are you trying to say that you want to scratch my belly, Lois?"

She stopped what she was doing and stood up. Turning on Clark, she put her best seductive face on despite her drunk steps. Clark gulped.

"Maybe I do...maybe I dont...whatcha going to do about it?" she asked, thought it might have been more of a purr.

Clark's eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he stepped back a few steps. "Uh, why don't we get you out of that dress?"

"I bet you'd like that," she offered and stepped closer, just as purr-like and seductive as her last statement.

He nearly squeaked. "I meant into something more comfortable. Like pants. Pants would be good."

Lois eyed him for a moment, Clark's back hit the counter. He wasn't sure what she was going to do. "I get to pick!" she exclaimed with a giggle.

Clark watched as she tore off up the stairs with Shelby following. '_Whew...that almost got out of hand..._' he thought to himself, but he wasn't quite sure if he'd have been upset if it had. They might spend most of their time pretending they want to kill each other, but he would have let her kiss him just then.

After about fifteen minutes, he started to wonder if Lois had gotten lost. She was pretty drunk.

Climbing the stairs and walking down the hall, he found Lois dancing on the bed with a phone in her hand, dressed in...

"Are you wearing my jersey?" he asked.

"Gotta go, Chlo!" Lois hung up and let herself fall onto the bed with a thud, "I sure am!"

Clark noticed that the jersey had ridden up to show quite a bit of leg. "You sure are," he muttered to himself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Nothing. Uh, what do you wanna do now?"

Lois bit her lip and cast him a funny look before laying down across his bed. "I don't know, Smallville. What do _you_ wanna do?" she asked seductively.

Oh boy. Words can't describe how Clark was happy to have control of his heat vision.

"How about we go downstairs? Away from...beds."

She sat up and rolled her eyes before smirking, "You're just no fun tonight, you know that?"

Clark couldn't help but smile, "I promised Chloe that I would keep you out of trouble, remember?"

Lois flashed him a devilish smile, "Trouble is my middle name, Kent."

"Don't I know it, Lane. Don't I know it," he said with his own devilish smile.

If he didn't know any better, he would have thought that Lois had some super-speed of her own. She was off the bed and crawling up his back before he could even blink or move a muscle, "To the Living Room, my chariot! Mush, Smallville! Mush!"

He did his best not to think about her bare legs wrapped around his waist. '_Baseball...baseball...baseball..._'

Once they reached the living room, Lois had spotted the stereo and jumped off of Clark's back again. He silently wondered what she was doing as she fiddled with it while he plopped down on the couch. It didn't take long until the music began to thump and Lois turned with a wide grin.

"_Step inside, walk this way, you and me, Babe. Hey! Hey!_"

"Come on, Smallville! Get up and dance with me!" she squealed.

Clark of course waved his hands, "No thanks, Lois. I got enough dancing in on the ride home."

"Don't be such a farmboy! Come on, have some fun with me! Dance!"

He shook his head and laughed as she danced wildly, "I'm not much of a dancer."

Lois rolled her eyes and rushed over to grab his hands and pull him to his feet, "Then I'll teach you!"

"_Take the bottle...shake it up. Break the bottle...break it up!_"

Lois grabbed his hands and made him twist and turn with her, "Pour some sugar on me! Oooh, in the name of love!" she sang.

Clark laughed and let her lead him back and worth, their hips twisting wildly.

"I'm hot, sticky sweet! From my head, to my feet, yeah!" she sang while laughing at her Farmboy looking so out of sorts. "Isn't this more fun than sitting there on your butt?" she asked him, barely able to raise her voice over the sound of the music blaring behind her.

He gave her a big grin. "I suppose it's not the worst thing in the world," he teased.

She rolled her eyes but spun around without ever letting her hand leave his, "Come on, Smallville! Do like the song says and loosen up!"

"_You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little, tease a little more. Easy Operator come a-knockin' on my door._"

Clark didn't even hesitate this time. If she wanted to play like that, he'd play like that.

"Take the bottle..." he sang, bringing a surprised look to Lois' face that quickly became a wild grin. "Shake it up!"

"Break the bottle..." they sang in unison, "...break it up!"

"_Pour some sugar on me, oooh in the name of love. Pour some sugar on me, come on fire me up._"

They danced back to back now, Clark completely letting go in trying to prove to Lois that he can have fun too.

Lois had never felt more alive than she did right then. She spun around to meet him on the front side after a few beats, they shared an electric look that made her stomach do summersaults. "This is the last part, Smallville. Think you can keep up?" she asked with a smirk.

"I'll show you keeping up," he challenged.

"_Pour your sugar on me, I can't get enough. Pour some sugar on me, oooh in the name of love!_"

Clark spun Lois around in circles and then pulled her close, dancing like he hadn't danced since that summer he ran off on red kryptonite. He could tell that Lois was impressed with him. To be honest, he was a little impressed with himself. But Lois always brought out the best in him.

Lois head banged to the last notes of the song before falling across the couch. Clark walked over and sat down on the floor next to her head.

"I guess I should stop calling you Smallville," she laughed.

He looked up at her with a smile, "No, I kind of like it when you call me that."

She propped herself up on an elbow and smirked at him. "Finally won ya over, huh? Another win for Camp Lane," she laughed.

"What about me?" he asked with an equal smirk. "Have I finally won over the esteemed Lois Lane?"

Lois stared at him for a few moments. Clark wasn't quite sure what she was thinking. "Yeah. I think you have."

They shared that look for a while. In the back of his mind, he knew that Lois was drunk, but he still felt special to hear it.

"You should come up here and sit with me, I'm cold."

Clark laughed as she broke the moment and grabbed them a blanket as he sat on the couch. Much to his surprise, Lois pretty much climbed into his lap and rested her head in the crook of his neck with a content sigh, "You're always so warm..."

"I guess it's one of the many qualities of Clark Kent," he teased.

Lois's eyes lit up. She lifted her head to give Clark a sultry look, "Yeah? What other qualities does he have?"

Clark gulped and tried to move away as she began to climb across his frame. "Lois..."

"Yeah, Smallville?"

He tried to slide over but found himself hitting the arm rest. "We shouldn't..."

"We shouldn't what?" she asked with a growing smirk as she climbed over him and brought her face to his.

"This..."

Lois was about to close the gap when her head shot up, "I have to throw up."

She bolted off the couch and ripped down the hallway at a speed that left Clark once again wondering about her secret powers. He jumped up and ran after her, making sure to clean her up when she was done. He carried her from the bathroom in his arms back to the couch because "I'm not done with you," she had demanded. Clark agreed to stay with her, but noticed that she was drifting asleep.

He kissed her on the forehead, "Goodnight, Lois."

She barely stirred, "Goodnight, Smallville. You're a...super...man..."

As he gently edged out from under Lois and covered her with the blanket, he had one thought, '_Time for a very long...very cold shower_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did it meet expectations? haha. I've read a few of the stories that cover Lois's drunken night, and almost all of them have the scene where they drive home in the truck and they listen to Whitesnake or the infamous phone call that Lois made to Chloe, so I wanted to skip them and try something new instead. I hope that it still worked, haha. I'm thinking Lois gets a bit...affectionate...when she's drunk, haha.

At least that's how I'm telling it. haha.

I went with Def Leppard because honestly, Whitesnake just seemed too obvious, haha. I didn't want to mail it in. I wanted to do something new. Hopefully you guys will like it, haha. I also wanted to kind of have some sweet moments in there that would lead up to the scenes that follow, and of course, when Lois admits that she loves Clark to the crazy jewelry guy. Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I have no idea, haha.


	87. Lara Clone

**Review Comments:**

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I have to let Clark Kent win sometimes, don't I? haha. And yeah, I think she's pretty hilarious, haha. And quite the vixen, haha. I love Whitesnake but Def Leppard is easily one of my favorite bands of all time so I had to show them some love, haha. I'm pretty sure that she's mentioned Def Leppard on the show at least once, I can't remember which one though, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_s01itaire90_** - Thanks! I was trying to do something new. A lot of writers have covered those big moments and I'm sure most of you have already read _their_ versions of how it would go. And I admit, I would have done the truck ride sing-a-long and the funny phone call if I hadn't read those ones myself. So I really did want to try something new that would be fresh. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, yeah, especially with Clark Kent in the room! hahaha.

**_A,sky_** - Clearly Clark was thinking about something that was going to make _him_ more comfortable, haha. I too wondered about that, can Clark Kent even take a cold shower? haha. Would nude snow angels in the Arctic work? haha. Who knows? haha. I will make sure to give you a very flattering costume change for Clark, just for you, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois, mentions of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #87, Lara-El (Clone)

**Author's Note:** Did you ever wonder where Lara was between that scene where she first sees Kara at the Kent Farm and then the scene where Clark takes her to Queen Tower to hide from Zor-El during Season 7's "Blue"? Here's what I imagine happened.

**

* * *

**

Clark entered the Daily Planet with his mother Lara following close behind. He knew that Zor-El was somewhere, and he was sure that Zor-El would be coming for his mother and Kara soon enough. He needed to keep her safe. He needed to hide her where Zor-El wouldn't think to look.

"What is this place, Kal-El?" she asked.

He jerked around, "Uh, you can't call me that here. Call me Clark?"

She frowned, "Why can't I call my son by his true name?"

Clark looked around nervously, hoping that no one had heard her. "I've chosen to keep my heritage a secret. To protect the ones I love."

"Why would they be in danger, Son?"

He stopped in his tracks and let out a sigh, "The world...the world isn't ready for someone like me to step into the spotlight."

Lara's face scrunched up in pain for him, "It must be so difficult to hide who you truly are."

Clark smiled at her, "It would more difficult to live without them. Like it's been difficult to live without you."

"Smallville?"

Both Clark and Lara turned to see Lois Lane approaching them from the elevator. "What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for Chloe. I need to help me with something."

Lois looked around, "I've been looking for her too. I think she went out for a coffee or something."

Clark frowned and looked away, but he felt an odd feeling rise up within him. He looked at Lois and smiled. "Lois, can you help me with something?"

She looked at Clark in surprise and wanted to say something snarky, but she noticed something in his eyes that made her change her mind.

"Sure. Whatcha need?"

Lara watched as the two shared a look. '_I thought Kal-El said that a woman named Lana was his companion..._'

Clark looked over at Lara and then back to Lois, "This is...Lara. She's uh...new in town, and I have to run an errand, and I was hoping that Chloe could look after her until I got back. But since she's not around...I was hoping that you could help me out?"

Lois felt a little burst of warmth at the notion that Clark trusted her to look after his friend, "Not scared I'll tell her embarrassing stories about you?"

He let out a laugh, which caused Lara to look up in surprise, "Do your worst, Lane."

Lois laughed quietly and pushed her finger tips together like a mad scientist. "Believe me, Smallville. I will."

Clark gave her a toothy grin and turned back to Lara, "Lois is my...friend. Stay with her and I'll be back after I visit a friend who might be able to help us with..." he cast a look back at Lois, "...your brother-in-law. She's a little annoying, but you'll get used to it."

Behind him, Lois was giving him a death glare.

"Thanks Lois, I really appreciate this."

She smirked at him, "Don't worry about it, Smallville. Don't forget get the rocky road for our movie marathon."

"What movie mara..." he started, but then he realized this was the price for the favor and he smiled, "...right. Of course."

Lois gave him a wide grin as he rushed up the stairs. She led Lara to the break room and tok a seat at the small table.

"So...I'm Lois," she offered awkwardly, her hand extended.

"And I am Lara."

"How do you know, Smallville?"

Lara frowned at the nickname, "I knew his biological father."

Lois looked at her in surprise, "Really? That's amazing. Is he going to get the chance to meet him?"

"I'm afraid that his father passed away not long after Ka-, i mean, Clark was born."

Lois frowned and looked away, "Oh."

"Why do you refer to Clark as Smallville? It is a monicker, is it not?"

The Reporter laughed, "Yeah. It's a nickname that I gave him when we first met. Smallville is the hick-town he grew up in, unless...unless you're from Smallville too? Which if you are, I mean the wonderful farming community he grew up in?" she laughed.

Lara joined her with laughter of her own, "No. I'm afraid that I am from a place far away from Smallville."

"That wouldn't happen to be Minnesota, would it?"

Lara frowned, "No. Why?"

Lois kind of froze and tried to put the worlds together properly in her head, "You two just...you kind seem...his eyes are kind of like yours."

Niether was clear on who was more surprised, Lara or Lois. '_When did I start noticing Smallville's eyes?_'

"You care for him, don't you?"

This time, it was definitely Lois that was surprised. "No!" she blurted out. "I mean, not...not like...you know..._that_ way. We used to live together. You kind of grow on someone that way. Me and Smallville, it's...different. We're just...Lois and Clark, I guess."

Lara looked confused. "But you are friends, correct?"

"Friends? That's probably...the word that you would use. But it just doesn't feel right. Friends kind of seems...small. We're more than that."

Lois began to sputter when Lara's eyebrows raised, "Not that we're...I didn't mean that we're...no. We're just...really good...friends..." Lois frowned to herself a little bit, "..._best _friends...We're close and all, but we spend most of our time wanting to kill each other. It's just...how we...are."

The motherly instincts flared up within Lara and she smiled with pride. She could see how Lois truly felt. It was her Kryptonian intuition. She knew first hand from her time with Jor-El, sometimes all that tension you believed to be anger and disfavor...was actually passion and love.

"I'm not usually this...bad with words? I don't know what's wrong with me," laughed Lois.

Lara gave her a comforting look, "Don't worry, Lois. Your secret is safe with me."

Before Lois could ask her what she thought her secret was, Clark burst through the break room door.

"Geeze, Smallville. Where's the fire?"

Clark looked freakishly relieved that they were ok. "Huh? No. What? I just...I'm just happy to see you."

Lois frowned and smirked, but before she could say anything, Clark added, "Both of you."

"Did you find your friend?" asked Lara.

Clark glanced at Lois, "Yeah. I did. Do you want to go see him?"

Lara read her son's face and saw that there had been trouble on his short trip. "I'd like that."

She rose and joined Clark at the door, but hesitated before turning back to look at Lois with a warm smile, "It was wonderful to meet you, Lois."

"Yeah...same here," replied Lois. And much to her surprise, she _meant_ it.

Lara left and Clark glanced back at Lois, "Thanks, Lois. I mean it."

Lois smirked, "Just don't forget the rocky road, Smallville."

He flashed her a big grin before leaving, "I won't."

Lois got up and watched as Clark left with Lara. She couldn't help but think they looked like they could have been mother and son. '_Oh well_,' she resolved. Taking a sip of her coffee, she turned on her heel and walked back towards the bullpen, "Hey Cuz..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? I figure that Clark wanted to drop her off with Chloe so that he could go see Lionel, hoping that he might be able to tap into his Emissary side and give him some pointers on how to deal with Zor-El. And after his encounter with Zor-El at Luthorcorp, he decided that he needed to take Lara to an even safer place and choose to take her to Queen Tower.

My goal was to show Clark trusting Lois with something this big, and then Lara seeing something special between Lois and Clark. Hopefully I managed to pull it off, haha. I know that a lot of us wished that Lara could have met Lois, so I'm hoping this works! haha. I really hope that my line about 'anger and dislike' actually being 'passion and love' worked as the title reference, I was struggling to come up with anything else.

Also, I wanted to tell you guys something funny that I noticed while I was working out the timeline (which I totally managed, btw! haha): On the 'Big Jimmy' chapter (#28), I noticed that I actually said the following line: "I have decided that I'll be ending this story at fifty chapters." LOL! hahahaha. We are 13 chapters from 100 chapters, hahaha. I have 13 chapters in my Document Manager and two pages of ideas in Word, hahaha. 50 chapters, LOL!

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Chief._


	88. Chief

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - Well, I think we'll have quite a bit of those moments up ahead, haha. And yes, I was very surprised as well! But that's her preference. It's one of my favorite stories as well (obviously, haha, i hi-jacked her character! hahaha.) Doesn't 50 seem so far ago? haha. I know that 50 was only, what? 38 days ago and all, but it seems like ages ago! haha. I've always wondered as well, so I _had _to write that one, haha. I'm glad that the new story is captivating some interest already! I won't be posting it until I'm done with this story though since those chapters will be considerably bigger.

**_A,sky_** - Awkwardness is always fun when it's other people, isn't it? haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k **_- Thanks! I was really pulling for it myself but instead we got saddled with Lana. Again.

**_katlynne_** - Well, I think you're going to like who I have in mind, haha. Can you really blame the guy? And can you really blame Lois for compromising by saying that he has to wear the cape? hahaha. I loved that line and the little bit about sewing an 'S' into the chest, "Is that tacky?" hahaha.

I'm glad you liked it! haha. I was super nervous about not living up to the expectations that come with such a fan-favorite scene on here, haha. I'll give you a spoiler: you will to get your drunk Clois fix in at least two upcoming chapters, haha. One might have to do with 'Fortune'. You'll never get it out of me! haha.

For some reason, I thought that was a really big step for them, haha. It was like he was trusting her with everything to let her look after Lara. I can't believe they stayed _just_ friends for so long either, I mean, all that nakedness and just friends? hahaha. I'm really glad you said that about Perry because he's going to have a line or two from 'the New Adventures of Lois and Clark' in this one, haha. He was my favorite Perry White as well!

_**cathy03**_ - Lol, I take it that you didn't like Lana and Lara's scene then? hahahaha. No, I know what you mean, haha. I really, really, _really _wanted to see Lara meet Lois in 'Blue' and was very disappointed that we were stuck with her sucking face with Lex's baby brother's clone instead. Even if the guy was a bit of a sweet guy, I still like my Lois with my Clark, haha. And yeah, Martha always seemed to have her head in the right place. Smart folk them Kents, lol.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, smallest hint of Perry/Martha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #88, Chief

**Author's Note: **I know that we've got some folks itching to see some Perry White, so here is my "Perry Returns" idea for Season 10. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

Lois and Clark were in the middle of bickering when Jeff, their ever faithful intern, walked into their office.

"Uh, Ms. Lane? Mr. Kent?"

Lois turned wildly towards him, "What is it Jeff? Can't you see I'm about to kill my fiancee?"

"More like kiss him," he muttered.

Clark frowned and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "What was that, Jeff?"

Jeff's eyes got big, "Nothing, sir. The new Editor-in-Chief wants to see you."

The duo groaned.

After Lex Luthor returned and reclaimed LuthorCorp, now renamed LexCorp, he had fired Tess Mercer. And when some billionaire from Gotham City had swept in and bought the newspaper out from under Lex, he appointed Franklin Stern to conduct a world-wide search for a new Editor-in-Chief.

Neither Lois or Clark had been impressed so far with some of the candidates that Stern had sent to Metropolis. But little did they know, they had a surprise in store for them today. Walking through the door and into the Editor's office, they were greeted by the back of a desk chair.

"Uh, hello? It's Lois Lane and Clark Kent. You wanted to see us?" offered Clark.

Spinning around, they saw the last person they ever expected: Perry White.

"Lane! Kent! Guess who's back on top?"

They were absolutely flabbergasted by the sight before them.

"You...You are our new editor?" asked Clark.

Perry broke out into a wide grin, "You better believe it, Clark. Stern offered me the job, and I just had to take it."

"Well, it's about time they hired somebody with an understanding of journalism," said Lois with a proud smile.

Clark nodded, "Congrats, Perry."

"And congrats to you two. I heard about your engagement from Martha," offered Perry.

Lois and Clark shared a look and then nodded, "Thanks."

"I always saw something special in you two. I'l tell you Lois, that boy would walk on water for you...or he'd drown trying. Still, it's romance."

She frowned and nodded with a quirky smile, "Anyways, what's the first thing on our to-do list, Chief?"

Perry smirked at the nickname, "Well, I was going to promote that Jeff Hage character to the bullpen. I think we need ourselves a new photography intern to help you two out. You two can write one hell of an article, but you're always lacking in the front page picture department. I mean look at this."

He pulled out a photo that Lois had snapped with her camera phone. "What is this supposed it be? A bird?"

Clark looked at it, "A plane?

"Ok! I get it. It's not the best picture in the world."

Perry gave her a '_come-on_' look, "I'd have better success using it on the weather page to tell people it was clear skies yesterday."

Lois glared, "And just what story do you have in mind that I can't _wow_ people with just my writing?"

"I'm glad you brought that up, Lois. We're sitting on top of the story of the century with this flying fella with the red cape."

They both shot each other a quick look, but Perry didn't notice.

"I want the name of this flying whatchamacallit to go with the Daily Planet like bacon and eggs, franks and beans, death and taxes, politics and corruption, and you two are just the team to reel that story in. It's going to wind up with the single most important interview since...God talked to Moses!"

Lois snorted, causing Perry to give her a pointed look. "Sorry, Chief."

"I'm not sure this guy _wants_ to be interviewed. I mean, he always takes off before the reporters can even get close to him,"offered Clark.

Perry frowned, "Great shades of Elvis. This is the _Daily Planet_, Kent. Whenever a story happens, the Planet gets it first and has it webbed and in print while the New York Times is still fishing for sources. We'll get that damn story or my name isn't Percival White."

"Percival?" laughed Lois.

"You didn't hear _that_ part. Now go get me my story!"

Lois rolled her eyes and hooked her arm in Clark's to lead him out of the office. One they were out of earshot, Lois whispered, "It'll be a short one."

Clark groaned and whined, "But I don't wanna..."

She punched him on the arm, "Don't be such a baby!"

"Oh, and Lane?" he called after her. Lois turned back to look at him as he smirked, "Don't call me Chief."

Lois smirked right back at him, "You got it, Chief."

Perry laughed and sat down at his desk. Letting out a sigh, he pulled out and lit up a cigar before peering out his office window at Metropolis.

"I'm the Editor-in-Chief of the Daily Planet," he muttered. "Great Cesar's Ghost."

* * *

**Author's note:** Well, how was that? haha. I wanted to add in some classic lines, like that bit about Superman and the Daily Planet going together like bacon and eggs, franks and beans, ect. I kind of imagine this being what Perry's big appearance in Season 10 will be like. Last I heard, he was going to be back before the end and I'm hoping it's to be hired as the new Editor-in-Chief of our beloved Daily Planet!

I filled this one with call-backs to the original Superman movies, the comics, and the Lois and Clark TV Show. I thought it added a bit of authentic Perry White to the chapter, haha. For those of you still itching to read more Perry White, you'll see him again in a bit in the sequel to '_Halloween_'! Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review! You know that little bubble right beneath all this jibber-jabber.

**Next Up:** _the Legion of Superheroes._


	89. Legion

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Honestly, I'm not sure, haha. Sometimes I like to leave things up in the air like that so that I can come back to them and have a chapter end with her wanting to kill him and Jeff interrupting them, so it kind of leads into Perry? haha. I think those tie-ins are fun.

**_cathy03_** - You think that's putting everything in it's place, wait until you read 'Darkseid'. Whoops, that was a tease, hahaha. Not only does that have like, THE moment we've all been waiting for, it's got the mother of all call-backs, haha. I'm such a tease, hahaha.

_**imhooked**_ - Thanks!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Hahaha, I hadn't thought about it at the time, but I am definitely seeing him do that dance now! hahaha. I'm glad that it was up to par with the enormous expectations, haha. Lois'll do anything for Clark as long as she thinks he doesn't realize it, haha. And yes! Perry is supposed to be back by the end of the series, and I'm hoping that he'll be getting promoted when he does! And I'd love a cameo of Jimmy as the "photography intern", haha.

**_A,sky_** - He is supposed to be back, so I'm really crossing my fingers that it's to get his new job! And yeah, I had to bring that line back, haha. I love it!

_**sasslady**_ - I checked around and I couldn't find anything but "Perry", but I'm a huge Scrubs fan and one of the characters is named Dr. Perry Cox, and his full name was 'Percival', so I thought it'd be funny to add it to the long list of reasons to love Perry White! haha. And yes, they've always had a father-daughter relationship and I'm certainly hoping we'll see that when he returns to the show. He was perfect in the New Adventures of Lois and Clark.

_**s01itaire90**_ - Haha, I always picture him as well! It breaks my heart that he is gone, I don't know if anyone will ever top him.

**_alexindigo_** - Yeah, it just wouldn't be a proper sendoff without Perry White barking from the Editor's office, would it? haha. And yeah, I'm pretty sure that just about everyone but Lois and Clark seem to notice their little game, haha. They're so oblivious sometimes. I can't take credit for the walking on water line, that was actually one of my favorite lines from the New Adventures of Lois and Clark. I wanna say second or third season?

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** kind of barely Clana, mentions of future Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #89, the Legion of Superheroes

**Author's Note:** Because I didn't like how little she was talked about, here's my little scene for 'Legion' that featured Lois Lane. Sort of.

**

* * *

**

Garth glanced around the Kent living room, clearly looking for something, "Dude, where's Lois?"

Clark frowned, "What?"

"Lois Lane. Where's she at?"

Clark and Lana exchanged glances. "What does Lois have to do with anything?" asked Clark.

Garth shot to his feet and starred at Rokk, "I'm calling it, man. No cape. No glasses. No flying. And now this?"

"Sit down, Garth."

"No way! We have the wrong guy. You don't ask about Lois Lane and get _that_ response from Kal. You don't. It's not _him_."

Rokk rolled his eyes, "This is the Kent Farm, you moron. Quit acting like a Sub."

"Then we're in the wrong time! Because he is not the man we know as Sup-"

"What is all this about? What does Lois have to do with my future?"

The three Legionnaires stared at him until Garth turned to Rokk, "Yeah, Rokk. What does Lois Lane have to do with Kal's future?""

Rokk let out a ragged breath of frustration, "It's not important right now. What's important is that we stop Brainiac."

"No. We can take five minutes to talk about this. Why is he talking like Lois is so important?"

Rokk glared at Garth something fierce. Irma on the other hand, took this moment to read Kal-El's thoughts. She sensed that...that he felt guilty about something. That he felt like he had made the wrong choice about something recently. Something about Lois.

"Kal, all you need to know, is that your relationship with Lois Lane will be part of what leads you to be the hero you become."

Lana's eyes narrowed, "Their relationship? Don't you mean their friendship?"

Garth snorted. Rokk looked like he was ready to murder someone.

"There will be many factors in who you become, Kal-El. Lois Lane is a part of that puzzle. Just like Lana, Jimmy Olsen, Lex Luthor-"

"Lex?" asked Clark. "You mean our friendship from when I was younger?"

Rokk gritted his teeth, "Among other things."

"Explain to me...why Lois Lane...is so important."

Lana frowned, '_Why is he so stuck on this? This Rokk guy just made it sound like Lex is coming back. All the way back._'

"Kal, we can't talk about this."

Clark closed his eyes and bit his tongue. "We can. And we will."

Now Rokk closed his eyes. "Fine. Make her leave. Garth, Irma, go with Lana."

"I'm not going anywhere," explained Lana.

"Lana. Go."

Lana turned to look at Clark, who hadn't torn his gaze from Rokk's face. "Clark, you can't be-"

"Please. Just go. We'll come get you in a minute."

She sat in shock for a few moments, but finally stood up and exited the room with Garth and Irma.

"Explain."

Rokk rubbed his face and sighed, "What do you want to know?"

"I want to know why he's talking about Lois like that."

"Why is this so important to you, Kal?"

Clark clenched his teeth, "Because I want to know that she's ok. I want to know that nothing bad happens to her."

For the first time since they began the conversation, Rokk smiled. "I can promise you that nothing bad happens to Lois Lane."

"Then why is she so important?"

"Because she's the one that you'll _never_ let anything bad happen to."

Clark frowned, "I...I won't?"

Rokk placed his hand on Clark's shoulder. "As important as Lois Lane is to us? To our history? It's nothing compared to how important she'll be to _you_. Someday, the name Lois Lane will be synonymous with the hero that Kal-El of Krypton becomes. I promise you that."

Clark let out a ragged breath. Lois was going to be fine. She wouldn't be a footnote in how Clark Kent became some hero. She wouldn't be one of those people who were important because they died and that inspired him to become more. She was...she was going to be just fine.

"Thank you."

Rokk nodded and sat back in his chair. "I'm sorry about Garth. He just doesn't understand."

"Doesn't understand what?"

"The trick with time travel is that you see the little moments that don't get painted into the big picture," offered Rokk. "Now I understand that you aren't there yet but in the future, you are known for a very special kind of romance."

Clark didn't quite understand, "What do you mean 'a very special kind of romance'?"

"Kal, has anyone told you about a romance where someone might want to simultaneously kiss _and_ kill their partner?"

Frowning, Clark tried to make sense of what Rokk was trying to say. And that's when it hit him.

"...Lois?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, I feel like that would have made that whole 'Lana Returns' arc a whole lot better, hahaha. I was going for a kind of Clois-centric type chapter with a bit of understanding that Clark might not man-up quite yet. I wanted to portray that Clark was terrified that Lois might play a Jonathan Kent type role in his life in the sense that her death (with all this talk about Chloe possibly inspiring him with her death) might inspire him.

Plus, I re-watched this episode the other day and I found myself thinking, "Why aren't they asking about Lois! That would be the first thing that I would ask about! Where is Lois Lane?" hahaha. Anyways, let me know what you thought, shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Clark Kent. (WINK WINK)_


	90. Clark

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k _**- Haha, I hear you loud and clear. Lois Lane will kick some ass if someone tries to move in on her Smallville, hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - They mentioned her, and it wasn't even in an importance kind of way. They made it sound like she was on par with Jimmy Olsen, and as much as we all love Jimmy Olsen, he's not even in the same league as Lois Lane. The Darkseid chapter is actually the next one up!

**_s01itaire90_** - Haha, I know right? That's the first thing I asked when I watched the 'Pilot'. "Where are his glasses and where is Lois?" haha. How did they not think to ask about Lois Lane? She goes hand-in-hand with Clark Kent. Just the way it is.

_**katlynne**_ - I love that line! "Great Shades of Elvis!" haha. It's just awesome-mc-awesomeness. I think we'll see a chapter where they "write" Superman's first interview and we'll see him whine-a-plenty! haha. And yes, Perry must come back to be Editor and give Clois their office! haha.

Garth has no filter, does he? haha. I can always count on him to be abrupt and blunt, haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I wish Lois would have just kicked in the door SWAT team style and kicked some Lana Lang ass, haha. That's my fantasy, haha. She's got the connections, why couldn't it have happened? Why? haha. Unfortunately, Garth got pushed to the back of the herd because Rokk is obviously the leader and Irma served their plot better I guess. It's too bad they said there won't be any other Legion folks besides Booster Gold and Blue Beetle in Season 10.

Yeah, I originally had a line about how Lois is the one that makes you take to the skies, but then I rewatched the episode and realized that wouldn't have fit in with what they were talking about in reference to his flying. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**alexindigo**_ - It is _THE_ chapter, hahaha. And because of popular demand and the fact that I liked writing it, I think we'll see _Kal_ again, haha. I didn't want to make him mean to her because it wouldn't have felt right (even if we all wanted it, haha), but I did want to make it clear that he _needed_ to know about Lois.

**_jade2nightwing_** - Exactly. How do you meet Clark Kent, knowing his history, and not ask about Lois Lane? It's insanity! haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I wish they would return too. I think that Irma was talking about Lana's plans to steal the Prometheus suit, wasn't she? I'm not sure. This chapter will be about Red-K Clark, but there is a Clark Luthor chapter in the works. He'll be back.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** I have no idea how to rate this one, haha. T? If you don't like suggestive material, I'd skip this one.

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #90, Clark Kent

**Author's Note:** You wanted to see our Boyscout be a little less wholesome, so here it is! Haha, Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

"There's nothing wrong with doing something special, Clark."

Bruce frowned, "Don't listen to Oliver, he's an idiot."

"Hey! I'm the married one here. I know what I'm talking about."

"It was a drunken night that you guys ended up being an annulment."

Oliver's jaw dropped, "We only got it annulled because she wanted a real proposal. Besides, who are you to talk? You've got a longer tabloid history than me!"

"Guys, I'm not going to wear cologne," laughed Clark.

Bruce shook his head, "I'm telling you, girls like a guy that put some effort into it."

"Don't listen, man. Lois loves you just the way you are."

"Diana! Help me out here."

She rolled her eyes, "I don't know, Rich Boy. I imagine you get a lot of your women thanks to your checkbook size."

"Gee, Princess, is that why you're always swooning around me? My uh..._checkbook_...size?" he smirked.

Bruce barely avoided the pillow that Diana rocketed towards his head. "Just smell it, Clark."

Before Clark could react, Bruce sprayed the cologne towards him. "I'm telling you, this is my lucky cologne."

No one noticed the way that Clark's eyes flashed red. They assumed he was blinking his eyes and laughing because Bruce sprayed him. Clark ran a hand through his tame hair to make it wild. When he cracked his neck and made a mischievous expression, Diana frowned.

"You ok, Clark?"

He flashed her a wide grin, "Yeah. I feel..._great_. You know, I think I'm going to go see Lois. Start our anniversary early."

Clark blurred out of the room in a flash before any of them could reply. Oliver frowned, "That was...weird."

At the Daily Planet, Lois was out on the main floor and talking to Jimmy about their latest piece.

"Look Olsen, I don't care what Perry says. We're getting that story."

Jimmy scrunched up his face and whined, "But he's going to kill us."

"He is going to be kissing our feet when he sees that front page beauty, now quit being a baby. Got it?"

"But-"

"You're sleeping with my sister."

"What time did you want to meet?" he immediately blurted out.

Lois grinned, "That's my boy."

She turned to walk back towards her and Clark's office when she ran into a body. Looking up, she saw her husband grinning down at her. He quickly grabbed her hand. "Clark! What are you doing?" she laughed as he pulled her into the Copy Room.

He shook his head, "Don't call me that. Call me...Kal."

"Ok...Kal. Kind of kinky, but who am I to talk?" she laughed.

Kal eyed her hungrily with a smirk. "I _do_ love your little costumes."

Lois frowned at him, but couldn't keep the small smile from forming on her mouth. '_Bold Clark Kent? This could get interesting..._'

Kal slipped around behind her and pushed himself flush against her back, Lois' head shot up. "Smallville..._that?_ Was my _ass_."

"You bet it was."

She spun around and look him in the eye, "What has gotten into you today?"

"Can't I get excited about being married to the sexiest reporter in town? Is that such a crime?"

Lois looked a little closer, and she could have sworn she saw a flash of red in his eyes.

"Besides, are you saying that you don't like this?" he asked. His hands brushed up her sides, fingers grazing just short of her chest. "That you don't like it when I take control?" he whispered in her ear, which caused her knees to go weak. "Well, Lois?"

Letting out a ragged breath, "I can't say that I don't. But you're not exactly acting like the Clark Kent I know and love."

He clicked his tongue, "I told you...call me Kal."

"Fine. Kal."

He whipped her around and kissed her deeply, hands roaming wherever they pleased. She brought her arms up around his neck to help her stand. He knew all the right pressure points and just the right way to kiss her to leave her knees out of order for a bit.

"Smallville-

"Kal," he told her, tracing kisses down her neck and unbuttoning her shirt in the process.

"Kal...we can't do this in here."

He let out a laugh, "Never stopped us before."

"And we had to explain the birds and the bees to Jimmy."

Kal let out a groan and looked her in the eyes, "Then what do you want, Lois?"

She stared him down. There was something about seeing the fire in his eyes that made her wave off her worries. "Our office."

Letting a wide grin break out across his face, "That's my girl."

They sprinted from the Copy Room towards their office, slamming the door shut along the way. That's when Oliver and Chloe showed up.

Oliver had an inkling that something was wrong with Clark, and well, he had heard about the night that Lois and Clark crashed Lana and Lex's engagement party enough times to have his suspicions. He called Chloe to help him confirm, "Well? What do you think?"

Chloe shrugged, "Let's get closer. He talks different when he is on Red-K."

They shuffled on over to their office and stuck their ears to the door. All they could hear were moans, groans, and grunts.

"That's our smoking gun, right?" asked Oliver with a disgusted look on his face.

Chloe shook her head, "Not exactly."

"I thought you said it makes him all...you know..._bow chicka bow wow_."

She let out a laugh, "Which would have been unusual before, but he's like that all the time now."

"What's the difference between then and now?" Chloe gave him a funny look, "Right. Lois. I gotcha. Well, what are we going to do?"

Chloe grimaced, "You think we should just risk it?"

Oliver went very pale. "I do not, I repeat, do not want to see how far Clark Kent's farmer tan goes, Chloe."

Chloe took a deep breath and pushed open the door with closed eyes, "What the hell, Chloe!", she sprayed the antidote randomly and wildly before slamming the door shut behind her. Oliver was standing on the other side, "Did it work?"

"If it didn't, you're going in there for round two."

He looked very scared at the notion, "Don't even joke about that."

Inside the office, Clark backed away from the desk as he came out of his Red-K high.

Lois was sprawled out across the desk, "What the hell is going on, Kal?"

"Lois...Wow, I'm sorry. I was...I was on red kryptonite."

He expected her to be upset as she got up and walked over towards him, "Well..." she let out a laugh,"...that explains a lot."

Clark broke into a grin, "I'm sorry if I...you know...made you feel..."

"Shut up, Smallville," she laughed. "I have to admit, I kind of enjoyed it."

He frowned and laughed, "Really?

"Honestly? I thought it was kind of sexy."

"Did you just call me sexy?" he asked with a smirk.

She rolled her eyes and gave him a toothy grin, "Don't let it go to your head, Smallville. I'm still the Hot Fudge around here, Halibut."

"As long as it's still Hot Fudge _and_ Halibut..." he pulled her in close, "...I'm just fine with that."

Lois smiled warmly, "It always will be."

Their lips met and their arms became entangled. Clark led her backwards until her legs hit the table, where he lifted her up by her hips. Lois leaned back and caught his eye, and her smirk said that they didn't need red-kryptonite to bring out a fire between them.

Not that she didn't keep her _special _red lipstick under lock and key at home...

* * *

**Author's Note:** Did it live up to expectations? haha. I actually found that I liked writing him that way, haha, so I don't think this is the last we've seen of Red-K Clark Kent. I didn't want to get graphic or anything because it's not everyone's cup of tea, so it was kind of difficult to figure out how to do it without going there, so hopefully we had a good balance? Also, I just wanted to show the more playful, kinky side of Clois, haha.

I was trying to come up with "how did Clark get infected" and "how does he get disinfected", so I wrote the little League piece and the Chlollie part to go with it since I thought Chloe was the most prepared person to deal with Clark's current state, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Darkseid.


	91. Darkseid

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And I'm glad that Chlollie and Bruce/Diana served the story well too! haha. Well, you know me, I love my call-backs, and that line from 'Crimson' about Hot Fudge and Halibut was a must-have for me, haha. I'm glad you liked 'Legion' as well!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - He probably wouldn't be as violent or thieving, but I think he'd be violent under the right circumstances. And yes, I'm planning on looking at how this time around he wouldn't even consider leaving Lois in a future chapter. Nail on the head with the certain types of kryptonite and how she knows about them and what they do. I'm thinking about doing 'Red', 'Green', 'Black', 'Silver', and 'Gold' chapters to cover each one.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, you better watch it, he'll snap at you for calling him Clark, hahaha. I'll get some more kinky, playful Clois for you soon! haha. I used that scene from Persuasion as my idea for how he'd get infected. And I didn't think that Chloe would throw out a perfectly good antidote after just one use, do you? haha. So you actually got right inside my head there, haha. I too wish it would have worked for his Lana-goggles as well, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, color me flattered! hahaha. I'm glad you liked all those little parts! And I agree, Lois ignites a fire within Clark that would rival Red-K any day of the week, but that doesn't keep her from hanging onto that ole lipstick, does it? hahaha. You are very welcome!

_**clarkfan325**_ - I'm glad that you agree. Those Legionnaires need to go do some more homework! haha. And yeah, Bold Clark can be pretty fun. haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I am honestly tickled pink that the Chlollie bit was so well received, haha. I really liked how that all came out!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #91, Darkseid

**Author's Note: **I know that you guys are like me and have wondering how this scene will go down. Here's my guess. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

"Jor-El!"

Lois and Clark rushed into the Fortress of Solitude. "Jor-El! I need your help! I need to defeat the Darkness that's come to Earth."

A few moments went by with no response from Jor-El. "I will defeat this Darkness with or without you! I'm asking you to help me. After all this time, after all that I have accomplished, you can't really believe that I have darkness in my heart! You can't really believe that I won't be Earth's savior!"

Nothing.

Lois took Clark's hand as his head fell. His father was going to abandon him when he needed him the most. They turned to leave.

"Kal-El, my son."

Clark turned back to the Fortress, "Jor-El?"

"I see that you have found strength within yourself. I see that you have cleared your heart of doubt and instead filled it with love."

He glanced to Lois and smiled, "I have."

"I have been critical of your past inability to deal with your human emotions, but I have little doubt that the Kents raised you to have a heart that cannot be filled with your Kryptonian heritage alone. Always hold in your heart the pride of your special heritage. The human race, they can be a great people, Kal-El. They wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all...their capacity for good...I have sent them you, my only son."

Clark's face molded into one of determination as he nodded, "I will not fail, Father."

"You must rise up, Kal-El. Be a beacon of light and hope in these times of darkness, my son."

Lois and Clark both flinched as they heard ice crashing behind them. Lois looked around, worried that the ceiling was going to cave in. Clark looked off into the distance and slowly walked away from her. "Clark? Where are you going? ...Smallville?" she tried, but he didn't respond.

He walked over to a far corning of the main chamber and knelt down, picking something up off the ground.

"What is it?" she asked as she cautiously walked over to him.

Clark stood up and held what Lois now recognized as the suit she had seen in his loft before Lex Luthor's clone kidnapped her. "Is that..."

He nodded, "It's the suit my mother made for me."

"This suit will shine as symbol for light against the dark forces that have pledged their allegiance to Lord Darkseid, Kal-El."

Clark looked back to Lois, and she smiled lovingly at him. "You can do it, Clark. I know you can."

He looked back down at the cape.

"Carter told me that a true hero was a person who embraced the life they were given. And made it better. They were a _Superman_."

Clark looked up at her and she pulled in very close. "Smallville. You _are_...a Superman."

They stared into each other's eyes for a few moments, and then something...super...happened. Clark blurred into the suit and stood before her with his hands on him hips and a smirk on his face. "I bet you want to kiss me right now,

Lois rolled her eyes and planted one on him, "Go save the world before I kill you."

Clark smiled and shot up through the skies and out of the Fortress. She watched him streak across the sky while fiddling with the key in her pocket. She made to walk towards the console to go back to Smallville when a voice boomed from above.

"Lois Lane."

She looked up in mild fear, "Umm...yeah?"

"I wanted to thank you."

Lois frowned, "And uh...and what exactly are you thanking me for?"

After a few moments of silence, she got her response. "For saving my son."

In Metropolis, Oliver struggled to stand up. Beaten and bloody, he didn't know how much more he could take.

"You should have accepted your destiny, Human. You shouldn't have challenged me. You should have bowed at my feet," taunted Darkseid.

Looking up, Oliver spit out blood. "I will _never _bow before a monster like you."

Darkseid reached over his head to deliver a fatal blow when something flew down between them and blocked Darkseid's swing.

Oliver looked up to see... "Clark?"

Clark didn't acknowledge Oliver, but instead stared down Darkseid with a fierce glare. Oliver had never seen Clark so intense.

"Stand aside, Kryptonian. Your fate will come soon enough."

He didn't waver. "No."

Darkseid let out a bellowing laugh. Looking around him as if looking for an audience. Stretching out his arms, he mocked Clark.

"Look around, you fool. I have taken over your planet. I am Lord Darkseid. You dare challenge me? I...am a God!"

Clark smiled an almost cocky smile. "Well, that's just swell...because _I..._am Superman."

With one swing, Superman sent Darkseid flying down the street and into the building nearly three blocks away.

* * *

**Author's Note:** And that's how I'm imagining Clark getting to don the Superman suit. How was it? haha. Now, that's hardly the end of the fight, but it does give me the ending I wanted for the chapter: Clark kicking some ass as Superman. hahaha.

I stole the infamous Jor-El line from the original Superman film, and I think I'd get chills hearing Terrence Stamp recite it. I really hope that they go full out and bridge the gap in the finale, and that line would be the absolute icing on the cake. It's one of my all-time favorites. I read that Oliver is going to play a big role in defeating Darkseid, so I figure he'll be fighting alongside Clark, hence why he's featured here. The battle DOES NOT end there. Just the chapter, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _The Luthors._


	92. The Luthors

**Review Comments:**

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Thanks! haha. You're too nice to me! haha. I remember that scene from the original Superman film where Clark says "Golly, Lois" and for whatever reason, I have always imagined him saying equally corny words ever since, haha. He _is_ a farmboy after all, haha. I read somewhere that Oliver is going to have a major role in defeating Darkseid, so I'm thinking he'll rise above his current corruption and stand alongside Clark in the end.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked the Bruce and Chloe bits! I hear you loud and clear about the graphic stuff, and I've been considering doing a chapter that would meet with that notion head on, but I hadn't really started working on it just yet. Still thinking about it. I absolutely love that line. Just the way that it kind of points out to Clark that there is plenty of bad in the world, but they can be good if they mean to be? I love it!

**_clarkfan325_** - Thanks! I just want to see him get it in a way that'll show just how important it is to his role as Superman.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Me too. It's right up there with "the father becomes the son, and the son, becomes the father" line.

_**sasslady**_ - I think they have had so many big moments that they can keep their heads clear by this point. And if you want to see some action, I think you'll like a chunk of the Power Girl chapter (the chapter after this one). I imagine there are plenty of people that feel that way about the suit, but I have to admit, I'm very excited to see Tom Welling don the suit and fly off into the sunset as Superman. It'll be like an early christmas for me, haha.

**_s01itaire90_** - Haha, she does enjoy her bold Clark, doesn't she? haha. With the suit, I just can't help but think with Martha telling Clark that he is the light and Jor-El talking about Clark being a beacon and of course both tie into the original Jor-El speech I used, that something like that has to happen. The suit has to be part of this symbol concept they've been talking about for pretty much all of Season 10. I'm crossing my fingers, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Lexana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #92, The Luthors

**Author's Note:** The title refers to Tess, Conner, and Lex since all of them in their own ways, are Luthors. BTW, this Conner isn't Alexander Luthor but actually the Conner that we established in 'Doomsday', 'Superboy', and 'Conner'. The flashback is from Season 6's '_Nemesis_'.

* * *

They watched the monitors in shock. Even though they knew there had been a chance, none of them actually thought he would win.

"I can't believe this! Who would vote for that monster?" shouted Conner.

Tess hung her head and roped an arm around him. "Not everyone knows what kind of man he is, Conner. Not like we do."

Oddly, Clark was silent.

He watched as Lex walked across the stage towards the podium. He shook hands with his random campaign managers. A smug grin spread across his face as he started his victory speech. He faintly heard Conner shouting, but Clark's eyes were glued to the screen.

"Dad?"

Clark glanced over to see Jo'an perched on the seat beside him. "Whats wrong, sweetie?"

"Are some people monsters?"

He frowned, "What would make you think that?"

Jo'an shot a look over towards Conner and Tess, whom were both still venting about Lex. "Conner says that Lex Luthor guy is a monster."

He closed his eyes and let out a sigh before turning back to her, "Well, what do you think?"

"I don't know..." she mumbled. "I heard Mom say that Lex guy wants to kill you. But not like when she wants to do it and then kisses you."

Clark chuckled.

"Anyone that would want to hurt my Dad has to be a monster, right? I mean, you're Superman. You just want to help people," she asked hopefully.

He pulled Jo'an into his lap and kissed her on the head, "No. Lex Luthor isn't a monster."

"How can you say that?"

Clark and Jo'an looked up to see Conner standing before them. He looked furious. Tess was still sitting, but she too looked angry at the notion. Clark let out a sigh and tried to prepare himself for this. Conner probably wasn't going to see this any other way.

"I know that you think that Lex is a monster, but he's not. He's just a sad man with a grudge."

Anger flashed in Conner's eyes. "Lex Luthor was born a monster, Clark."

"I'm sorry, Clark. I have to agree with Conner. Lex has always been manipulative and twisted," Tess defended.

Clark closed his eyes and shook his head. "You didn't know the Lex Luthor that I knew. You didn't know who he _was_."

Eyes pinched shut, he couldn't help but play the moments over again in his head from when he was trapped with Lex in those tunnels years ago.

_"You might be flesh and blood, but you've been hiding secrets from me since we met. You never trusted me," Lex accused. _

_He pulled the bandaged tight to bring a groan out of Clark. __"Would it have mattered?" snarled Clark. "What are you really doing down here anyways, Lex? Trying to find new ways to exploit the people that have different abilities than you?"_

_Lex looked at him with a stunned look. _

_"There's no gray area with you, is there? It's either all good or all evil! Did you ever try and see my humanity before you decided I had none?"_

_Clark turned back, "I did, Lex! And look where we are."_

_They wandered the tunnels, looking for an exit. They hit another dead end and Clark sank to the ground. They began to bicker back and forth. Clark had accused Lex of forcing Lana to marry him, but Lex claimed that he didn't force her to do anything._

_"Not being sure on that day was the hardest thing I've ever had to endure. You can believe that or not, I stopped expecting you to act like a friend a long time ago," Lex explained. He turned and walked away, not really going anywhere, just moving for the sake of moving._

_Clark looked over at him with an exhausted glance, "Were we ever really friends, Lex?"_

_"I don't know," he replied honestly. "I have nothing to compare it to. You're the only real friend I've ever had, Clark. And somewhere along the way, you saw me as your nemesis. And you turned your back on me."_

_The ceiling caved in and covered Clark in a pile of rubble. Somehow, Clark survived. "Lex, get this off of me!"_

_But Lex didn't move. He just stood there. "Don't leave me here." Checking his watch quickly, Lex tore off down the hallway. "Lex! Lex!"_

_Clark struggled to get the rubble to move with little results. He pushed and pushed, when suddenly it flew away._

_'My powers...but how...'_

_He looked up to see Lex standing above him. Lex had a pole that he had been using to pry the rubble off of him._

_"Did you really think I was going to let you die alone down here, Clark?"_

_The honest answer that Clark was thinking was yes._

_"I guess you never knew me at all," accused Lex._

Conner glared at Clark. "Then tell me, Clark. Who _was_ Lex Luthor? Because the Lex Luthor that I know? Is pure evil."

"Lex Luthor was a good man."

Both Tess and Conner took steps back while Conner's glare became a snarl, "What?"

"The Lex Luthor that I knew...was a good man. He wasn't born a monster and he isn't a monster now. He had just as much potential to be a hero as I did, and he was trying to be one. But he let his anger and his fear consume him. A lot like you're doing right now."

Conner would have hit anyone else. "I'm nothing like _him_."

"We all have a darkness in us, Conner. Tess? You know that better than anyone." Tess flinched. "It took me years to fight mine. Do you think I wasn't capable of being a monster? Ask Tess about a friend of ours named Ultraman. I could have been a monster just as easily!"

Jo'an grabbed Clark's hand, he saw concern in her face.

"Lex had that same darkness inside of him. But instead of fighting it? Instead of rising above it? He let it strip away pieces of him until there was nothing left but the man you know today. Lex Luthor had the potential to be the greatest of us all. He was not a monster. I just couldn't save him from himself."

They all shared a few tense moments of silence. Conner's glare never left Clark's face. In a flash, Conner was gone.

"I'm sorry, Clark."

He looked up to see Tess with tears in her eyes. "I shouldn't let my own issues with Lex influence Conner like that..."

Clark knelt down to her eye level, "It isn't your fault, Tess. Do you think I don't have the same issues? You know that I do. Every time I look at him, I see it all playing over again. My biggest failure. I walked away from him and he gave up on himself. He let himself become that man because I didn't save him."

"You can't save everyone, Daddy."

He looked over to see Jo'an standing beside him. Clark smiled at her as she stretched her arms out for a hug, he embraced his daughter.

"She's smart like her mom, you know that? But don't tell Lois I said that," laughed Tess, sniffing and wiping away her tears.

Clark laughed. "As long as you don't blame yourself for Conner. He'll see the truth about people soon enough."

"Yeah, that is a traditional Kent quality. You've always seen the best in people, Clark."

He gave her a pointed look with a smirk, "That's why I keep you around, Tess. You're one of the best people I know."

"Yeah, Mercy. You're one of the best people we know," parroted Jo'an with hands on her hips.

Tess let out a laugh, "Lucky me."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, that was kind of a downer chapter, but did I at least make up for it a little bit at the end? I wanted to do a chapter where people were harshing on Lex and Clark remembered him for who he was instead of who he is now, and that what he learned from Lex's downfall is that all people are just as capable of good as they are capable of bad. Clark Luthor only reinforces that idea.

Somehow, it ended up being Tess and Conner who were hating on Lex and Clark had to stand up for Lex. If you guys remember that story I talked about at the very beginning of this story, Lex would have played a kind of "neutral" role where he was clearly a villain in the past and likely to be a villain in the future, but Clark still had hopes that he would become more like the man he once knew and be more of a hero than a villain. So that vibe stuck around here.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review and tell me how I killed your good mood, hahaha.

**Next Up:** _Power Girl._


	93. Power Girl

**Review Comments:**

**_sasslady_** - I'm glad that you liked it! And yes, Jo'an is always adorable, hahaha. She's the best!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Doesn't Good Lex seem like one of those distant memories that you're not even sure if it was real or imagined? haha. That was the key for me here in terms of what I wanted to portray. Clark _always_ sees the best in people. And it's always important to remember that Clark could have been Clark Luthor just as easily as he was Clark Kent. We all have potential for good _and_ bad. Lex is really no different. That's why I love the Smallville Lex so much. That Lex was shown on both sides of the fence and even then, you can see how he rationalized some of the choices he made. Very big grey area.

Lol, I'm glad that Jo'an was a hit yet again. She's just the perfect addition, isn't she? haha. I didn't go back to check but I'm pretty sure that mygyps17 had Jo'an call Tess by Ollie's nickname, Mercy, once or twice, didn't she? I just thought it was beyond cute. And yes, only seven more chapters until #100! It's pretty exciting isn't it? haha. What's exciting to me is that it will be more-or-less been 100 in 100 days, haha. That makes me feel proud, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, St. Patrick's Day Hangover continuing to strike? I celebrated tonight! haha. Thanks for still stopping by! hahaha.

**_s01itaire90_** - One of my favorite things about Smallville Lex, in addition to his relationship with Clark, is the way he rationalized things. Even at the end of his run in Season Seven, you can see how he got to that place. As evil as he becomes, his choices were made in fear and/or anger and that's totally understandable and it's really easy to see how he got there. It makes him one of those perspective villains because, at times, he had good intentions that ended up bad choices.

_**cathy03**_ - Honestly, no matter what he says, I think that there will always be a part of Clark that hopes Lex will be the man that he believed Lex could be. That's the beauty of having Clark know Lex when they were younger. Even if the Lex that comes back knows nothing about Clark's powers, the fact that Clark has seen good in Lex would prove to make him a great villain because Clark is conflicted with him.

It's like Clark will stop Lex from doing horrible things, but he'll always have hope for Lex to become a good guy. To overcome his roots and his teachings. That is a huge part in why I fell in love with Smallville because they totally added a tremendous dimension to Clark's greatest foe.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #93, Power Girl

**Author's Note:** Pre-warning, I've blended Smallville and the Comics to make this happen. And btw, Kara Zor-L? Kal-L? Not typos. It's a bit long, enjoy!

**

* * *

**Kara Zor-L stirred from her slumber. She blinked rapidly. The sunlight hurt her eyes. '_Where am I?_' she wondered silently. She pushed herself up into a standing position and looked around. She was on the shore of a river. "Woah! Hey, are you okay?"

She looked up to see a brunette sliding down a hill towards her, "Hey Blondie, you ok?"

"I'm fine. Who are you?"

The woman looked at her like she was crazy. "Lois Lane. LuthorCorp Media. Well, formerly. Trying to get my job back. Do you realize you're soaking wet?"

"I need to find my cousin, Kal-L of Krypton. Do you know him?"

Lois looked at her with a confused expression, "Uh...cute name, but I've never heard of him."

"He was sent here to be your planet's savior, are you sure?"

The Brunette shook her head, "Not ringing any bells, sorry."

Kara frowned, and jumped into the air to fly away. Eyes bugging out of her head, Lois had a moment of realization.

"Wait!"

When the Blonde turned around, "I think I might know who your cousin is..."

The duo entered Watchtower with caution. Lois had explained to Kara the finer points of who Ultraman was and what he stood for. Kara refused to believe that this man could be her sweet, chubby baby cousin who laughed when she tickled his feet.

"I know you don't believe me, but look, this place we're in? It used to be my fiancee's. Clark killed him."

Kara was about to reply when she heard someone crash through the windows above. Kara shielded Lois from the glass. "Who are you!" the man demanded.

When Kara looked up, she saw a man who was a mirror image of her uncle when he was younger. "Kal-L?"

He frowned, "How do you know that name?" he snarled.

"I'm your cousin, Kara Zor-L. From Krypton."

Luthor stared at her, not sure whether to believe her. "I disowned that bloodline a long time ago. I am Clark Luthor now."

Kara frowned, "You can't be serious...that's...that's all we have, Kal-L."

"I have a whole empire. I am Ultraman. I don't need that extinct heritage, just it's powers. I rule this planet with strength and fear."

She glanced to Lois, who gave her an apologetic look. Kara couldn't believe that her baby cousin had become this monster.

"Kal-L! Your father didn't send you here to be a murderer!"

Luthor smirked, "My father sent me here to rule."

Kara didn't know what to say. She couldn't believe that her cousin was talking this way. "The House of L stands for good, Kal-L. Not evil!"

"Cousin, in case you haven't realized, the House of L is in ruins. I...am a Luthor."

He swiftly smacked Kara away, causing her to fly against the wall and fall behind the couch near the window.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Luthor?" screeched Lois.

Luthor turned on her, "I thought you would have learned not to interfere with my business a long time ago, Lois. You saw what happened to Oliver."

Lois began to shake with anger, Luthor smirked. "To Bruce."

"You son of a bitch," she growled before slapping him.

This only caused him to smirk wider. He gave her a light push, but it was enough to knock her to the floor. He began to advance on her, fury in his eyes.

Luthor heard a crash behind him. "Your reign ends now, Luthor."

He turned to see Clark Kent standing in the center of Watchtower. "Ah, you must be the other me."

"It's over, Luthor. Don't make this any more difficult than it needs to be."

"Haven't you figured it out yet? You and your _friends_ were brought here to be destroyed. We're bored with this world. You can thank Owlman for that. A very inventive mind that one. Psychotic, of course, but very inventive," taunted Luthor.

Clark let a smirk form on his face, "Well _my_ friends have already taken care of _your_ friends. I stayed behind for _you_."

"I see. Well, they are but ants compared to a God like me."

"In my world, their counterparts are nothing to shake a stick at."

Luthor grimaced, "Owlman said that you were raised on a farm, but I would have thought your vocabulary would have improved as the hero of Metropolis. You talk like a farmboy, do you really think you're in the same league as me..._Superman_?"

Clark's smirk molded into a snarl, "Let's find out..._Ultraman_."

Luthor lunged at Clark, but he managed to avoid his swing and smack Luthor across the room.

"You can't defeat me, Luthor. All you have is your rage."

His counterpart climbed to his feet, "My rage makes me strong."

"Not strong enough."

Luthor sprinted towards Clark, landing a punch that sent Clark to his knees. Raising his hands over his head, Luthor made to slam down on Clark, but he blocked his punch and delivered one of his own to Luthor's mid-section. With a swift punch to the face, Luthor landed in the second story. Clark turned to Lois.

"Are you ok?"

She looked at him with starry eyes, "Clark Kent?"

He smiled, but before he could reply, Luthor flew down to tackle Clark to the ground. Standing up, Luthor advanced on Clark.

"I will kill you!" raged Luthor.

But Clark kicked him across the room, "It's a Luthor trait to try, but you won't be anymore successful than they were."

Walking towards him, Clark tried to wave away the dust and smoke. Eventually, he used his super-breath to clear the room. And that's when Luthor appeared to punch Clark across the room. He smirked at Lois as he ventured Clark's way. "Take notes, Lois. Today, Ultraman takes control of the universe."

"Clark Kent is going to kick your ass, Luthor."

Anger flashed in Luthor's eyes, he stopped approaching Clark's unmoving body and moved towards Lois. "You first, then."

Lois didn't cower to him as he approached, but her eyes did fill with panic. Luthor raised his hand, and that's when they heard Clark.

"You don't touch her, Luthor."

Clark blurred over and grabbed Luthor mid-swing. He whipped Luthor around and punched him with every bit of strength that he had, causing Luthor to crash through the floor. Both Lois and Clark walked over to the hole in Watchtower's floor to see Luthor unconscious below. Lois was shocked.

"You...you beat him."

Clark turned back to her with a frown and a smile, "You sound surprised."

Lois looked at him in awe, "But...aren't you two...I don't want to say the same...but...don't you have the same powers? How did you do it?"

He looked down and grinned wildly. He looked back up at her with a tight smile. "You."

"Me?"

He wanted to laugh, she looked baffled by his statement. "Do you remember when I told you that in my world, you love me?"

"It might've crossed my mind from time-to-time..." she said innocently. Truth be told, it had kept her up more than a few nights.

Clark smirked, '_Even in an alternate-universe, she thinks I can't tell when she's lying._'

"Well, my powers take me pretty far. But your love? It's what gives me the _strength_ to be more than your average hero. It makes me Superman."

Lois smirked, "So I guess that means you kind of like me then, huh? Uh...the other me...I mean..." she finished awkwardly.

"Yeah. I guess you could say that..." he held up his left hand and showed her his ring with a smirk, "...actually, I kind of love her."

She gasped and grabbed his hand, "Holy crap. I'm married to you?"

Clark smiled as he watched her take in this information. She looked up at him embarrassed.

"Sorry," she told him sheepishly. "Sounds like _your_ Lois has all the luck. Would explain why I'm always on the wrong side of it. Must be my fate."

"Lois Lane only believes in the kind of fate that she can make," he told her with a knowing smile.

Lois smiled warmly at him, "Yeah? You think I'll find my Superman? In this crazy world?"

"I think that you can do just about anything you put your mind to, Lois. Even in this world, you're the real hero of the story."

For a moment, he thought she might kiss him. He figured he ought to do something. _His_ Lois would kill him if _this_ Lois kissed him.

"I have to go now. Make sure to call the authorities to take him in. They can use green meteor rocks to keep him under control," he told her as he pulled out Owlman's controller. She just stood there. "You're going to have to leave the room for this to work," he laughed.

Lois smiled a shy smile at him. "Oh, sorry." She walked towards the door, but before she walked through it, she looked back. "Thanks, Clark."

He smiled. "Always."

She left the room and he pushed the button on the controller. It began to light up and caused Clark closed his eyes to the blinding burst of light, and when he opened them, he saw _his_ Lois Lane standing in front of him. "Smallville?"

He grinned widely, "I'm so glad to hear you call me that."

She sprinted towards him, jumping into his arms and kissing him deeply. "Earth-2 Lois try and get a double-scoop of Farmboy goodness?"

"Consider yourself universally consistent..." he smirked, "...you couldn't resist me."

Lois rolled her eyes and punched him on the arm. "Why I oughta..." she leaned in to kiss him again, but was interrupted by a sound behind the couches.

The two glanced at each other with matching frowns. Clark started to make his way towards the sounds. Lois stood behind Clark as he inched around the couch. Their minds synced, '_Did Clark Luthor get through?_' The first thing he saw was...blonde hair?

"Wha...what happened?" asked Kara-L.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think of my Smallville version of Power Girl? In the comics, she was one of the sole-survivors of the multiverse collapse and the Earth-2 version of Supergirl. Now, when you hear Earth-2, you will probably think of Clark Luthor's universe and by extension Ultraman's. But in the comics, Ultraman was from Earth-3 and later the Anti-Matter Universe. Earth-2 Superman was an older version of Clark that was like a father/uncle to Kara.

Anyways, I decided to make my Power Girl the Smallville Earth-2's Kara that didn't understand why Clark was evil since she wasn't raised by the Luthors. It's really the only way that I thought would make sense while tying into Smallville's multiverse. I hope you guys liked it!

**Next Up:** _Going to have to be a surprise._


	94. Karen

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - There is New Earth, the main continuity, and 51 other Earths that go from Earth-1 to Earth-51. This is the post-Crisis universe. Prior to the Infinite Crisis storyline, there was more than I can even begin to count, haha. Mainly because back in the very beginning, each hero had his own universe. So, Batman had one universe. Superman had another. Green Lantern another. Wonder Woman another. Then they started having cross-overs and that would make a new universe. It's a huge headache, but it's become an important part of the various comics because of how they affect each other.

The Universe that Clark Luthor lives in is most commonly referred to Earth-3, though it's sometimes called the Anti-Matter Universe. He goes by Ultraman and the Owlman I mentioned is that Earth's version of Batman. In that universe (at least in the comics), all the villains are heroes and all the heroes are villains, which means Lex Luthor and the Joker (the Jokester in that universe) are the heroes. 'Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths' does a good job of explaining that universe if you have have the chance to rent it! haha. I know it's all very confusing and I barely understand it as is.

_**cathy03**_ - I lose track of it all the time, hahaha. That's the main reason I decided to forgo introducing another Earth or another Universe and simply made Power Girl come from the Universe that Clark Luthor lived in. I figured she'd still be a hero because she wasn't raised by Lionel.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm glad that you liked it! And while I agree that Clark Luthor needs someone to kick his ass, haha, Power Girl has made her way over to Earth-1 and I'm not sure she's going back anytime soon, haha. I liked having him whip up on Luthor too, haha. I think we'll have a chapter where we see the Justice League face off against the Crime Syndicate. Too much fun not to, I loved 'Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths', highly recommend it.

He might not have seen it, but I bet he felt it as Clark knocked him around, haha. I feel terribly for Earth-2 Lois, so maybe we'll have a chapter where she thinks about that and then have her meet a new hero for her to have her own happy ending with, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Red-K Clark will return! Mark my words! haha. I'm curious how the Dark Ollie is going to pan out as well. I think I read it, haha, Nathan Fillion is just the best, isn't he? haha. I agree with you about Clark and Lex though. In a lot of ways, they made each other. I think Clark's black-and-white view has a lot to do with seeing Lex's grey view and how it hurt a lot of people. And after Clark turned on him and left Lex without a friend, Lex fell into Darkness.

I'm not sure if we'll ever see a _good _Clark Luthor in this story. We'll see a softer version of him in the 'Clark Luthor' chapter, but for the most part, he's always going to be a dark character. Ultraman didn't have a redeemable bone in his body in the comics and that's who I think of and hence I'm biased. Even if Lois could change him, I don't think she will bother trying after what he did to Lex, Bruce, and Oliver.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked 'Darkseid' and 'the Luthors' despite their intensity! And yeah, I tried to lighten things up in 'the Luthors', and who better than Jo'an to pull it off! haha. I had to find a way to bring her in and that's what came to me! haha. I feel terrible for her as well, and I wouldn't have killed off Ollie if he wasn't already revealed to be dead in 'Kent', the next episode. But I'll find her someone! I promise! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Kara/Bart

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #94, Karen Starr

**Author's Note:** I didn't really have anything prepared, so I figured I'd wing my Karen Starr chapter as the continued chapter. Enjoy!

**

* * *

**

_Earth-2 Lois left the room and he pushed the button on the controller. It began to light up and caused Clark closed his eyes to the blinding burst of light, and when he opened them, he saw his Lois Lane standing in front of him. "Smallville?"_

_He grinned widely, "I'm so glad to hear you call me that."_

_She sprinted towards him, jumping into his arms and kissing him deeply. "Earth-2 Lois try and get a double-scoop of Farmboy goodness?"_

_"Consider yourself universally consistent..." he smirked, "...you couldn't resist me."_

_Lois rolled her eyes and punched him on the arm. "Why I oughta..." she leaned in to kiss him again, but was interrupted by a sound behind the couches._

_The two glanced at each other with matching frowns. Clark started to make his way towards the sounds. Lois stood behind Clark as he inched around the couch. Their minds synced, 'Did Clark Luthor get through?' The first thing he saw was...blonde hair?_

_"Wha...what happened?" asked Kara-L._

_They exchanged glances while Lois frowned, "Is that...she looks kind of like Kara, doesn't she? And...holy crap, did you see the size of her-"_

"Lois."

"What? They're freaking huge."

Clark leaned down to help Kara-L up. "Are you ok?"

Kara-L blinked her eyes a few times before looking at Clark's face. When she realized who he was, she pushed him away and got into a fighting stance.

"Kal-L! Don't move!"

Lois and Clark shoot each other a nervous look. Then Kara-L noticed Lois' clothes. Then she noticed Clark's clothes. They weren't the same as before. And her hair was longer. Kara-L looked back and forth between them, "What's going on? Why do you look different?"

"I understand that you're probably confused...and scared...but we're friends," explained Clark.

Kara-L wasn't sure whether or not to believe him, "Lois?"

Lois looked shocked. '_How does this chick know my name?_', she thought. "Uh...yeah?"

"What's going on? Why is he acting like that?"

Another glance between the Kents, er, Lane-Kents. "I'm not sure what you're talking about, Blondie. He's always like that."

That's when a thought occurred to Clark. "Are you...did you know...us...and we were different? Was I a bad guy?"

Kara-L narrowed her eyes and nodded. Clark let out a sigh. This woman was from Earth-2.

"There isn't any easy way to explain this...but you accidentally came with me to a different universe. I'm not like Clark Luthor. My name is Clark Kent."

She seemed to have a moment of realization, "Kent. That was the name of the family that my Aunt said you would be raised by."

Clark nodded. "In this world, I made it to the Kents. But in the other world, I was found by a different family first. The Luthors."

"You were a monster in that world, Kal-L."

"I know," he muttered. He looked down as his feet in guilt.

Lois noticed this and decided to pick him up, "But he's our greatest hero in this world."

Kara-L smiled approvingly. Clark looked up at Lois with a loving expression. "In this world, I am known as Superman and Kal-El of Krypton."

"I am Kara-L of Kyrpton," she explained.

"Did somebody say my name?"

The trio looked back to see Kara Kent walking through the door. She walked up to them before frowning at the Blonde.

"Who is..." she frowned, "You look..."

Clark saved her the trouble, "Kara, this is Kara-L. She was accidentally transported with me from Earth-2."

Kara Kent and Kara-L got close and looked at each other closely. They were similar, yet different.

"Wow..." they muttered in unison.

They slowly walked back from each other, but kept staring at the other. "So are we going to send her back?" asked Lois.

"I don't-"

"Please don't, Kal-El. I don't want to go back to a world where you are a villain," Kara-L begged.

Lois and Clark exchanged looks. They knew exactly what the other was going to say, so they just smiled.

"Kara-"

"Yes?" they both responded.

Lois slapped a hand to her face, "Good god, this is a headache waiting to happen."

"You mistakenly called me Karen several times during our ride to Watchtower. The other you, I mean. I could go by Karen?"

The trio nodded in agreement. "Karen what though?" asked Lois. "How many Kents can we have running around?"

"Starr."

They looked at Kara, who smiled shyly. "When I was a little girl, my father called me his little Star."

Karen smiled, "I like it. Karen Starr."

Then Lois smirked deeply, "And now we can use my totally awesome superhero name!"

Clark rolled his eyes, "We're not going to call her Uber-Girl."

"I wasn't going to say Uber-Girl, Smallville," and then she muttered under her breath, "At least not now." Those blessed with super-hearing did not miss the hushed mutter. "What about my other one? Power Girl? It totally fits the mold."

Kara smiled, "I like it. What do you think Karen?"

She looked away for a few moments with a small smile, and then looked back, "We'll all be heroes together? Here?"

Both Kara and Clark nodded, causing Karen's small smile to turn into a full out grin.

"Then call me Power Girl," she declared.

After they got to know Metropolis' newest defender a little better, Clark took Karen aside to explain Earth-1's sequence of events. Karen was none too happy to find out that her home planet was gone, her family dead, but being there with Kara and Kal-El made her feel better. Like she still had a place in the word. She would probably have to occasionally remind herself that it was the House of El that she was now a part of, not the House of L, but it was still family.

As they waited for Clark and Karen to finish talking, Lois noticed that Kara looked a bit down, "What's got the Maid of Might looking so glum?"

"Oh, it's just..." she started before sighing. "...I wish I had a pair like that."

Her cousin-in-law followed Kara's gaze to Karen's chest. Lois smirked, "I bet you're happy that Bart is a butt guy then, huh?"

Kara's face nearly split in two her grin was so wide, "You know what? I love you, Lois Lane. You are the best cousin-in-law a girl could ask for."

Lois let out a laugh, "What can I say? I have a gift at soothing the woes of the House of El."

"That you do, Lois. That you do." Kara frowned a moment, "At least when you're not trying to kill Kal-El that is."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, how did I do introducing Power Girl into the Smallville-verse? haha. I know that it's a bit away from the comics, considering that the Earth that Power Girl is from has absolutely nothing to do with the Earth that Ultraman lives on, but hopefully it works.

Also, it's worth noting for those who are unfamiliar that while Kara Zor-L is supposed to be the Kara Zor-El equivalent for Earth-2, Power Girl does have some different features from Supergirl. Their faces are not totally different but they do feature differences. Though the more infamous difference is Power Girl's very general bust size, haha, in comparison to a more modest bust size for Supergirl.

Also, the Martian Manhunter chapter will be very similarly done to how these two chapters were done (#93, Power Girl and #94, Karen Starr). We will have '#98, Martian' and then we will have '#99, Manhunter' since they are the same chapter split in two for length reasons. And here's a hint, J'onn will be reading some minds to try and see what they might have blacked out and can't remember. Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** It should of been '_Clark Luthor_', but given it's proximity to the 'Power Girl/Karen Starr' chapters, I might mix it up with something else.


	95. Blur

**Review Comments:**

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Well, Bruce is dead, haha, but I think I have my eye on someone for her. She was with Lex, Bruce, and AC in the comics off the top of my head but Lex and Bruce are dead and I dunno about AC as a love interest for her. Well, Power Girl came from the other universe and stayed in the New Earth so I figured my Power Girl should stick around as well. Besides, hopefully (fingers crossed, hahaha) Ultraman and the Crime Syndicate stay in jail.

I hate to disappoint you, haha, but let's just say that J'onn is seen at the beginning and at the end of the two chapters, haha. He is more the method to dive into a story that might be a little...uh..._hazy_...to some folks, hahaha. But I can't say anymore! haha. But he will return in a couple other chapters!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I think Clark doesn't mind it either way, hahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - It's always possible to change, I very much agree on that idea. I just think you have to want to change. And I'm not sure that Clark Luthor is ever going to want to change. He's a murderer and a mad man. He's always going to want to be that. But I can definitely see what you mean about it being an occupational hazard, haha. I routinely imagine some wild ideas about the most mundane things, haha. And thanks! 100 crept up on me! haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, when Lois Lane is in trouble, Clark Kent will always be there to save her, haha. Can't be any other way! haha. I've always thought that Lois had the best lines on Smallville, so I have to try and make her as awesome in the story! And yes, Power Girl is here to stay.

_**katlynne**_ - Can you just imagine those two huddled around a computer? haha. It's going to be pretty funny if I may say so myself, haha. Well, you know how it goes, haha. You add in some red-K, the steaminess has to get amped up, doesn't it? haha. And oh yeah, total bro-mance going on between Ollie and Bruce. I'm so surprised that I haven't had people asking for them to get together! hahaha. They're so competitive! haha.

I think that Lois is going to hold it over Jimmy's head forever. It'll forever be her trump card, haha. And yeah, I kind of feel like if I have something even half good in Ollie's mouth, those of us that imagine Justin Hartley will hear pure gold, haha. He really is the best addition to the cast since Erica Durance, haha.

It is sad, isn't it? I'm going to miss Clois and the Smallville gang. Especially when I'm not sure anyone will top this group. That's my biggest worry. It's going to be my new Star Wars speech. The kids who were too young to watch it are going to fall in love with some half-ass version of Superman, and I'm going to be going on and on about how the Smallville Cast was the best Superman cast we've gotten to see. It'll be sad for me, haha.

I'm glad you liked Lex and Clark, and of course Jo'an channeling her inner-Lois to make her dad feel better, haha. I think we don't see enough Lois and Kara, I'm really hoping that when Kara returns (SO EXCITED! Haha.), we'll have them together for a scene like they had in 'Supergirl'. Loved it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #95, the Blur

**Author's Note:** It has to come at some point, right? haha. Set just after 'Isis'.

**

* * *

**

Lois and Clark sat in a pile of limbs in the copy room. Still clothed, but breathing hard. "I really..._really_...hate you right now," she muttered.

He smirked, "Can't control yourself, Lois?"

"Oh, don't even start with me, Smallville. You're the one that pulled me in here in the first place!" she accused.

No denial was coming. Clark just laughed to himself as he wiped some sweat from his brow.

"And then you lay this stupid...'lets take it slow' thing on me."

Clark nuzzled into her neck and made her moan again, "I just laid my biggest secret on you. I don't want to rush into this."

She rolled her eyes, "I've known for weeks, that's hardly rushing it."

"This time..." he muttered.

Lois frowned and shot up into a sitting position. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Gulp.

"Uh, na-na-nothing," he stammered.

"Clark Kent, I am going to kick your-

"Fine."

She huffed at him cutting off her threat, but looked at him expectantly. "Chop, Chop, Smallville. I don't have all day."

"You sure about that," he tried as he nuzzled back into her neck.

For a moment, Lois almost forgot that she was trying to get him to explain what he meant. '_But only for a moment!_'

"Nice try. Spill it."

Clark let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. "Well, you've kind of learned my secret every year since we met. Except in 2005. You really weren't on your game that year," he teased her, which caused her to flare up and give him a threatening glare.

"I was helping your dad get elected senator, and then I was helping our mom," she snapped. "Or have you forgotten how awesome I was?"

He let out a laugh, "Believe me...I'm never going to forget that."

Lois bit the corner of her lip to compose herself, "If I've been finding out your secret on an annual basis, why haven't I remembered it?"

This was the question that Clark was not looking forward to answering. He wasn't going to look very good by the end of this.

"Well, it's kind of a funny story..." he started.

Lois frowned, "I like funny stories. Tell me your funny story."

"Well, you remember when Kevin Grady came through town and was erasing people's memories?"

"Yeah, and he totally screwed me out of a couple hundred bucks. What about it?"

Clark grimaced, "Well, I kind of caught two big beams to save Chloe...and you and Sheriff Adams...well...kind of saw it."

She looked at him with a scary, "And you let him erase my memory?"

"I didn't so much as let him, as much as I kind of didn't try real hard to stop him..."

Lois let out a dramatic sigh, "Well, I _suppose_ I understand."

Clark smiled warmly, happy that Lois was taking this so well. But that's when she started hitting him.

"You stupid!" Hit. "Stupid!" Hit. "Stupid!" Hit. "Little!" Hit. "Twit!"

He grabbed onto her wrists and she calmed down slightly, "That better be the worst of it."

Clark flinched.

"Oh god, what next?" she groaned.

"Remember Valentine's Day?"

Lois felt her eyes bug out of her head, "You son of a-"

"I was on red kryptonite!"

"I don't even know what that is!"

Clark let out a sigh, "It's a kind of meteor rock that removes my inhibitions. I showed you my powers to impress you."

"Was I?"

"Ooooh yeah."

This earned him a punch on the shoulder. "Cute, Smallville. Real cute. Take advantage of a drugged chick."

"I was drugged too!"

Lois rolled her eyes, "Details. Which, by the way? You're giving me those details later. Now spill on the rest."

"Well, then there was the time that I was never born."

"Woah! What?"

He chuckled, "I was having this...moment...of doubt. And well...Jor-El showed me what the world would have been like if I hadn't grown up with the Kents."

"And you met me?"

"Yep."

"And I saw your powers?"

"Yep."

Lois bit her lip and quirked a small smirk, "How did I react?"

"You totally wanted me."

She groaned and punched him in the shoulder, "I'm being serious!"

"So am I. You asked me out on a date. Helped me sneak into a Presidential conference. And tried to peek at me naked."

"Why were you naked around me? Again?"

"You made me dress up."

Lois shrugged, "Costumes _are _awesome."

Clark let out a laugh.

"So how did I find out last year?"

This was the one that he was least looking forward to. He would have to tell her that even though she responded positively to his secret, he still choose to keep it from her. He was seriously worried that she was going to storm out and never speak to him again.

"Uh...well...Linda Lake was going to write this story about me. About...who I really am. And I wanted the real story to come out."

Lois looked up at Clark lovingly, "You asked me to write it, didn't you?"

"Yeah," he told her shyly.

"How did I react?"

Clark smiled warmly, "You didn't believe me..." Lois frowned, so Clark added, "...at first."

"How did you convince me?" she wagged her eyebrows.

He blushed lightly, "I showed you my super-strength. Gave you the whole inside scoop. It was a great article, Lois." She blushed. "The whole city seemed like they were behind me. It was...perfect. But then things got ugly."

"What? Why? Why did things get ugly? Clark, tell me why things got ugly. This sounds like, perfect. How could it get ugly?"

Clark had to bite back a laugh. She was far too invested in this. "Linda Lake struck back."

"That bitch."

This time he laughed. "She said that I was the start of an alien invasion. The city turned on me. "

Lois let her jaw drop, "What a bunch of tools."

"Long story straight, I found a way to back in time and fix everything."

He braced himself for her to start screaming. But she was oddly quiet. "And you didn't tell me..."

"Lois, I couldn't...I couldn't let my secret ruin your life the way that it did my parents. I had seen how much it hurt people. I couldn't hurt you, Lois."

She was very quiet for a few minutes.

"Say something."

"Monster truck rally."

Clark frowned, "What?"

"Take me to a monster truck rally. And I'll forgive you."

He laughed. "So, if I take you to a monster truck rally, we get to kiss and makeup?" she nodded. "And if I don't, you're going to kill me."

Lois pretended to think about it, "Yeah, that's the deal."

"Well, in that case..." he gave her a megawatt grin, "...how do you feel about running a couple states over to see Monster Jam 2010?"

Once again, she started to pretend to think about his proposal. "It's a date."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I always kind of pictured Clark having to tell Lois about all the times she found out but "forgot" his secret, so it kind of turned into this chapter. We will have him explain the exact events of 'Crimson' to her in a later chapter, haha. She won't forget about that! haha. I hope you guys like their banter in this one, it felt kind of refreshing to get back to a little more banter-y dialogue between these two, haha.

Obviously, we referenced 'Blank', 'Crimson', 'Apocalypse', and 'Infamous' in this one. Shoot me a review, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** '_Kent Farm_'.


	96. Kent Farm

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - She is just too awesome not to, right? haha. And yeah, I think that Lois is my favorite as well, and I have little doubt that I'm going to look back as a very bitter old man that Erica Durance was the best Lois Lane we ever had, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - He died in 'Ultraman', remember? haha. And yep, in the comics, Lois Lane set Lex Luthor wine and dine her. My only explanation? Temporary insanity, haha. I recall that vividly, I especially loved Perry White bursting in to tell her what she already knew, haha. I hadn't thought about it that way either until I went back to see which time came after which one, and I was like, "Wait a second, this is almost a yearly thing..." haha.

I think that he'll be honest about it, and it'll lead to a very special conversation, haha. I don't want to spoil it, I'm already writing it, but I think that (given what I've read amongst the reviews so far) it'll meet expectations! And yeah, I think Lana will always be a sore topic, but they make it through.

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad that it worked! Part of the problem with introducing certain characters from the comics is that they don't always fit in Smallville's universe seamlessly as other fit in. Power Girl is right up there with the hardest to explain, haha. And yeah, you know me, I love my little offscreen scenes, haha. And yeah, I've always wondered that myself, and the conversation where he explains his heritage, oh no, did I spoil a future chapter? haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - I think part of her knows that it's done and over with, and she's just happy she knows now, so she didn't make a huge deal about it. Besides, he totally blew their last Monster Truck rally date, haha. It's about time he pays up, right? haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Her and everybody else! hahaha. It seems like every episode, multiple characters end up with concussions, haha. I remember seeing a poster of Lana Lang where she was making a very unflattering expression with a caption that said, 'This is what happens after [some number] of concussions'. hahaha.

I used to think that it wouldn't work to have Lois know the secret, but now that I see it, I like it. Haha. Everyone adored the "_Whoosh!_" comment from 'Masquerade', haha. It's just a whole new wonderful world to write about! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Hahaha, I was thinking the same thing! But then everyone made this big deal that Lois and Clark hadn't had sex before 'Ambush', so I decided to just write it as a make-out session. And oh yeah, Lois Lane can make Superman sweat alright, haha. I'll give you a bit of a spoiler for future chapters, if you really want to see Clark explain 'Crimson' and/or Lois and Clark enjoying a monster truck rally? Watch for the 'Smallville' chapter, haha.

And oh yes, I don't think we'll ever look at the Kent Farm front door the same way, haha. Bow chicka bow wow indeed, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Maddie-Fawning-After-Clark? hahaha.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #96, Kent Farm

**Author's Note:** Takes place sometime in late Season 7. Here is a hint, play "I Won't Say (I'm In Love)" by Cheryl Freeman while you read, haha.

**

* * *

**

"Uh...Maddie, I've got some bad news."

She looked up from the couch, "What's wrong, Clark?"

"Well, your Grandmother doesn't feel comfortable driving during the storm, so she's going to stay the night in Metropolis."

Maddie grinned and patted Shelby furiously, "Did you hear that Shelbs? We're going to have a sleepover!"

"That's not all..."

She looked up at him with a confused expression, and that's when the kitchen door flew open.

"Alright, who's ready to have a movie marathon?"

Maddie let her head drop into her hands while Clark grimaced. When Maddie looked up, she groaned, '_Not Lois..._'

Lois walked over and set her bags on the kitchen counter, taking a moment to shake the wetness out of her hair. Maddie noticed how Clark watched for a bit longer than a friend ought to watch. She let out a sigh. She was never going to get his attention with _Lois_ here. They would bicker and fight until she wasn't sure whether they were going to kill each other and jump into each other's arms to kiss themselves senseless.

"Uh, Lois, what are these?"

She looked up to see Clark holding the movies in hand, "They be movies, Clark. Little box go in magic square that make pretty picture."

Clark rolled his eyes are her caveman talk, "I meant that they look a bit..." he glanced back at Maddie and then back at Lois, "...adult?"

Jaw. Dropped.

"What are you talking about, Smallville? What's wrong with them?"

He let out a sign, "A Nightmare on Elm Street? Friday the 13th? The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?"

"Oh! There's farms in that one, you're going to love it."

Clark let out a laugh despite his annoyance, "We can't let Maddie watch these kinds of movies, Lois."

"Why not? I watched these kind of movies when I was her age."

"And just look how you turned out."

Lois let out a strained laugh and put a hand on her hip, she walked into that one, "Coming from Tall, Dark, and Plaid-some, that's really something."

"Can we watch a movie now?" questioned Maddie, feeling a little left out.

Clark smiled, "Of course. Why don't you pick one out?"

Maddie squealed and hopped off the couch, diving towards the cabinet under the TV. Lois walked past Clark, making sure to bump into him with her shoulder and give him a fierce glare. "Watch it, Smallville, I don't want to have to take you down in front of the kid."

"The only thing you're going to take down is a tub of popcorn, Lois."

Lois narrowed her eyes, "Just because I am going to wolf down a tub of popcorn, doesn't mean I can't wolf you down."

Both Maddie and Clark looked at her oddly.

"Uh...I mean...foot, ass, you, shut your face."

Lois pushed past Clark and sat down on one of the end spots of the couch. Maddie slipped in the movie while Clark made popcorn. Lois noticed that the kid had made sure to see as far away from Lois as possible, which meant Clark was sitting in the middle.

Evil smirk intact, Lois laid across the two spots with her feet hanging off the end and her head near Maddie's leg.

"What are you doing, Lois?"

"Messing with Smallville."

Maddie frowned, "Why?"

"Because I'm Lois Lane...and I'm addicted to messing with Farmboy."

The younger female just rolled her eyes. Lois turned her head to look at the TV, "Seriously, Kid? Hercules? Aren't you a bit old for this?"

"He reminds me of Clark."

Now Lois rolled her eyes, "Believe me, Clark Kent is a lot of things, but he's no super-hero."

Just then, she felt something graze her feet. She shot a glance towards the end of the couch and saw nothing. She shook it off assuming that Shelby had gone to visit Clark in the kitchen. Then she felt it again. She nearly jumped. "What the hell?"

Suddenly she saw Clark Kent's head pop up from under the arm rest and grab her ankles. He tickled her feet merciless.

"Stop it! Stop it! I'm going to kick your, stop! Smallville!" she begged, laughing the whole time.

Maddie let out a dramatic sigh, '_I knew that Lois was going to steal my thunder..._'

"Well then why are you laying across my spot, Lois?" he teased. "I figured since there was no room on the couch, I should entertain myself some other way!"

Lois shook wildly on the couch, "Stop it you moronic farmboy!" she yelled while laughing like a maniac. "I'm going to kill you!"

"Would you two just kiss and get it over with!" shouted Maddie.

Both Lois and Clark froze.

Gulp.

"What are you talking about, Kid?"

Clark frowned, "Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about Maddie."

Maddie pondered saying something, but instead huffed, "Nevermind."

Both Lois and Clark exchanged nervous, awkward glances before Lois scooted over to give Clark some room on the couch. After a while, Lois and Maddie were going back and forth about one of the musical numbers while Clark walked Shelby. "This is so unrealistic, Maddie."

She shot Lois a glare, "Why?"

"A farmboy turned into a hero? What are the chances of that? And why would she fall for him?"

"Because! He's so hunky!"

"He's a dork."

"Clark is a dork."

Lois frowned, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Oh _please_, like you two haven't been flirting the whole time you've been here."

"I'm just teasing him, Kid. Don't read into it."

Maddie rolled her eyes, "Didn't you say earlier that Meg was flirting with Hercules when she was teasing him?"

Lois opened her mouth to reply, but seemed to be having a hard time speaking.

"It's...that's not...it's _totally_ different!"

Maddie snorted, "Who do you think you're kidding, Lois? You're totally in love with Clark."

"I will not admit that I'm in love with, Smallville. No chance. No way. You are way off base, Kid."

"You sound kind of like the song."

"What song?"

Maddie pointed to the screen where Lois saw Meg finish, "_At least out loud, I won't say I'm in...love..._"

Suddenly, Clark burst through the door soaking wet. His shook the water from his hair, his t-shirt sticking in all the right places, causing Lois to bite her lip.

'_I most definitely won't be admitting to being in love...but I will admit one thing...Clark Kent is a sexy farmboy sometimes.'_

Clark look up and caught the look on her face. So did Maddie, who was now smirking. He looked back and forth between them, "What?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I wanted to set this whole idea up with the notion that Maddie has a crush on Clark, and would feel threatened by Lois, which would make Lois kind of realize her own feelings for the bumbling farmboy, haha. I like to think that this conversation might have led to Lois being so forward about getting Clark to apply for the Daily Planet internship, I mean, something had to spark it, right? haha.

Anyways, I just wanted to bring back Maddie for a chapter, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** '_Clark Luthor_'.


	97. Clark Luthor

**Review Comments:**

_**sasslady**_ - Not only bested, but she totally knows it too, haha. And hey! Who said you could read my notes! haha. As for Clark Luthor, I too have wondered what would have happened when Clark got back, but I doubt he will have changed. Obviously, he's going to screw over Clark again in 'Kent' and I already had him forming the Crime Syndicate in 'Power Girl', so I'm think he might be hopeless, haha. I think he is beyond repair...

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, even the dog sees it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Awww, haha. I'm glad that you liked it so much! It's been a little while since I've been so light and fluffy, so it was nice to go back. I'm thinking that it's been what? About four years since 'Fragile', and Maddie was 11 then, so we're talking about a 15 year old girl. I think she has enough self-control to not kill Lois, haha. Even if it is over Clark, haha. I just happened to hear the song when my iTunes was on shuffle the other day, and immediately, I thought Lois! lol.

It's ok that you forgot, hahaha. 97 chapters in, even I forget stuff and I'm writing it! haha. I hope you enjoy Clark Luthor!

**_A,sky_** - It has been a while, hasn't it? haha. I'm a big call-back and reference guy, so I'm a little disappointed that we don't have more of that as well. There are a lot of episodes where I think it would be more fun to have a cameo instead of a new random actor, like have Maddie show up at Smallville High or something as a new Freshman or maybe Jordan (the kid with the visions) is working part time at the Talon, stuff like that? It would be fun to me.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - It came on during 'Shuffle' on my iTunes and it just clicked. My head shot up and I was like, "that's so Lois," hahaha.

**_Katlynne (LoisClarkNLove)_ -** You're going to make me blush! haha. And gee, make a guy self-concious of how many 'haha's he uses, why dontcha? hahaha. I'm going to be having a bit of a pity-party/self-indulgence-of-denial myself come May, so feel free to stop by, haha. I'm glad that you liked my off-screen explanation of how many times she's found out, but I think the real fun will be when he explains 'Crimson' _and_ heritage to her, haha. Plenty of potential there! haha.

Aren't they just the most unlikely yet super awesome couple? hahaha. And believe me, Maddie will be returning! haha. Too much potential! Only 7 this time! ;) .

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, it's such an innocent gesture that can lead to something so much more...not...innocent...hahaha. I'm pretty sure that they are the only two that don't realize that there is something there, haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

**_cathy03_** - No way! haha. How funny! And nope, that conversation won't take place during that moment, haha. More like somewhere in between Isis and Harvest. For now, they are basking in the awesomeness that is Lois knowing Clark's secret, haha. I'm glad that you liked Power Girl! I know she's not very common amongst Superman media. Her first non-comic appearance was in Superman/Batman: Public Enemies i think, and that was just two years ago. Funnily enough, she was voiced by Allison Mack! haha. Better known as Chloe Sullivan!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #97, Clark Luthor

**Author's Note:** Takes place pre-Season 10's 'Luthor' and pre-'Ultraman', hopefully it's a good blend of good Clark Luthor and bad Clark Luthor.

**

* * *

**

Lois laughed as Clark flinched. "I haven't even touched you yet, you big baby."

"Well, it hurts," he retorted sheepishly.

An eye roll later, Lois dabbed at his cut gently, "See? Was that so bad?"

Clark smirked, "I think I can tolerate you playing nurse for me."

"Watch it, Luthor. You keep that up, I'm going to start thinking you're flirting with me," she laughed.

"Would that be such a bad thing?" he offered.

Lois hesitated. There was a part of her that had thought about her and Clark as a couple for quite sometime. But there was also a part of her that knew Clark's history with women. She just couldn't risk their friendship over something like that.

"I don't think you would be able to handle the Lane charm, Mr. Luthor," she teased. Doing her best to hide her thoughts.

Clark gave her a strained expression, but smirked before she could notice the sadness in his eyes. "You'd be surprised at what I can do, Ms. Lane."

She rolled her eyes, "Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Clarkie."

Lois looked away for a few moments, but looked up with a frown. "I can't believe your dad kicked Lex out last night."

"Huh?"

"No, I mean, I'm pissed about what he did to you, but...Lex is his son. I can't believe he threw him to the curb like that."

Clark made an expression that Lois couldn't quite read. He was thinking back on last night, his thumb grazing his sleeve covered forearm.

_Walking into his father's study, Clark kept his wits about him. Lex wouldn't have asked to meet him here out of the kindness of his heart. He gazed around, hoping to find a clue. He felt something...odd, like a brush across the back off his neck. When he looked back and saw nothing, he shrugged it off._

_"Ah, Clark. How nice of you to come by."_

_He looked up to see Lex walking in through the side door. "Lex."_

_He smirked at his brother, "Now, is that any greeting to give your big brother?"_

_"As you so often remind me, Lex...we aren't brothers."_

_Lex gave him a genuine smile before taking a seat at Lionel's desk. "You're catching on."_

_"What do you want? I assume this isn't a social visit?"_

_"No. Not exactly."_

_Clark gave him a 'get-on-with-it' look._

_"I wanted to talk to you about your future with the Luthor family."_

_"What about it?"_

_Lex smirked and glanced around, "Well, maybe I should rephrase that. I want to talk about your lack of a future with the Luthor Family."_

_It was Clark's turn to smirk, "That sounds like a threat, Lex. Please...tell me that it was."_

_"Our father has raised us in his image, Clark. He expects us to step up. Take the Luthor throne. The thing is..." Lex pulled out a gun from a drawer in Lionel's desk and pointed it at Clark. "...there's only room for one of us on that throne."_

_Clark gave him a predatory glare, "I really hope that you've got kryptonite in that gun, Lex."_

_He made to super-speed to Lex's side and take the gun away, but he found himself moving at a human-speed._

_"No. I don't have kryptonite in the gun, Clark. But I do have Blue Kryptonite stashed around the room. I'm not stupid. I'm a real Luthor. Unlike you."_

_Lex pulled the trigger, sending Clark to the ground writhing in pain. He walked towards the fireplace, the smirk on his face grew with every step. Taking a rod out of the fireplace, he walked to Clark. Lex stood on one of Clark's forearms and gazed down at him. _

_"You are just a piece of cattle that my father took in and treated like famiy, Clark. Now, I'm going to brand you like cattle."_

_He pressed the rod into Clark's arm. Clark screamed in agony. He pulled the rod away and looked at the golden stone steaming at the end of it. "Gold Kryptonite. This one isn't going to heal. You see, you're just an alien, Clark. __You don't have any real family. You've always been alone in this world. And now...you'll die alone."_

_Lex aimed the gun at him again, but before he could pull the trigger again, Clark swatted the gun away. It flew under the desk and the two tangled on the floor. When Lex had apparently forgotten was that even though Blue Kryptonite took away Clark's powers, he was still a much larger than Lex, __When Lionel arrived, it was far too late for Lex. _

_Clark remained tangled with Lex, Lionel wasn't sure whether Clark was covered in his own blood or Lex's, but what he did know was that one of his son's had killed the other. Clark looked up, tears falling from his eyes, "I couldn't...he...I was so...angry..."_

_Lionel rushed to Clark's side and enveloped him in a tight hug, "It's ok, Clark. You had to, Son. You had to..."_

"Yeah," muttered Clark. "It was pretty harsh."

They shared a few moments of silence while Clark thought about the night before. He hadn't left the study since it happened. He couldn't. He just sat by the fire and looked at the new carpet that his father had brought in to cover the blood stained stone floor. Lionel's cleaners had come. They had tried to make Clark leave, but he wasn't having any of it. Lionel choose to abide by Clark's request. They brought him some water and new clothes to clean up, but he remained.

That's why he was still cut up. He had spent the whole night sitting there. Thinking about what he had done. He felt terrible about what he had done. He hadn't meant to kill Lex. He was just so...angry. Clark was blinded by the rage and hate for Lex in the moment. He had snapped.

"Do you think he'll come back?"

Clark looked away in shame, "No. I don't think so, Lois."

Lionel had arranged for Lex to be found in a week in what ought to appear as a mugging gone wrong in the city. Lex Luthor was an easy target to spot, Lionel was certain that the story would be conceivable that a mugger would try and rob him. Lex Luthor would be a valuable mark.

"That's a shame," she told him. "I'm really sorry."

"What do you mean?"

Lois paused for a second, trying to find the right words. "Well, I mean, I know that Lex is your _adopted_ brother. But he's still your brother. I mean, you've always known him. It's about more than blood, Clark. I don't know what I'd do if I thought I might never see Lucy again."

Clark smiled, "You know, there are times when I think you don't know me at all, and others where I think you know me better than anyone."

She gave him a warm smile back, "That's what I'm here for, Clarkie. One save at a time."

'_Yeah_,' he pondered lovingly. '_Lois is saving me. One day at a time, making me feel normal. Who knows what I'd become without her..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I originally wanted to have it as purely a non-evil version of Clark Luthor, but then i thought it would be a perfect chance to talk about the night that he killed Lex and how he got the scar from Lex. Maybe I'll finally write that chapter and my version of how Lois meets Clark Luthor, and he'll be a nice guy the whole time? Who knows. I find it so hard to write him as a nice guy, haha.

I also thought it might be a perfect chance to throw in a classic line with a Earth-2 spin on it. Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** '_Martian_'.


	98. Martian

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Well, a thought occurred to me: Would they have those classic moments still? Would she deliver that Harley line to Clark? Did Clark Luthor ever even meet Lana Lang? And for that matter, how did he meet Lois Lane? Did he meet her when she came to work for the Daily Planet (even though I wrote that they knew each other from before in 'Ultraman'). So I took a chance and used the line, not really knowing.

I'm kind of going for the "Clark turned his back on Lex, so Lex let himself be consumed by his darkness" thing here with Lois and Clark Luthor in the sense that Lois turned her back on Clark for what he did to Bruce, so Clark let himself turn into Ultraman.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - He did get the scar with Gold-K, I forgot to say that there was Gold-K on the tip of that rod, haha. The original flashback had it, but I re-wrote it because I didn't like how it went the first time around. But I went back and fixed that line, good catch! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you liked it. I know a lot of people have called for Clark Luthor to be redeemable, but I just don't see it, so I gave us a little pre-needing-to-be-redeemed Clark Luthor instead, haha. I know what you mean though, I wish they had made it too, because then he wouldn't have become Ultraman and he wouldn't be the monster that he's become on Earth-2.

**_sasslady_** - I don't like Lionel as a good guy, but I do like him as that middle man kind of character. And I could certainly see (good or bad) how he might want to be on Clark's side. So I've always looked at him as a neutral kind of character. But yeah, he did screw up Lex (in both worlds) and Clark Luthor in Earth-2. Power is just one of those things that can really cripple you morally because you'll do anything to get it and/or keep it.

_**Katlynne (LoisClarkNLove)**_ - Hahaha, I'll let it slide this one time, haha. ;) I hadn't realized it was on Friday the 13th, how insane! haha. I know what you mean though, it's like Firefly and Scrubs are ending all over again! Except so much worse! haha.

I guess we just have to enjoy Clark Luthor and Lois while it lasts? It is tough. It's like watching Anakin Skywalker, knowing he will become Darth Vader and try to kill his own children, haha. I'm not really sure what's going to happen with the Gold-K in the trailer, perhaps a flashback to when Clark Luthor was scarred? I'm more worried about Jonathan Kent kicking Clark's butt, haha. I hope he at least finds out _this_ Clark is a good Clark.

_**cathy03**_ - I grew up in a house where there always seemed to be a young one, so there were a lot of Disney and other cartoons playing when I was growing up, haha. I can do all the voices for Alladin and the Great Mouse Detective and stuff, haha. It's very embarrassing, haha. It did seem out of place despite the fact that I'm always eager to see Clark move forward with Lois and towards his destiny at the Daily Planet.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Emil/Tess

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #98, Martian [Manhunter]

**Author's Note:** A little warning, it's probably not what you expect, hahaha.

**

* * *

**

**Idea:** J'onn gleans the League's minds to see what _really_ happened during Lois and Clark's bachelor/bachelorette party.

"Get out of here! She did what?"

Oliver was bent over laughing, "You should have seen her face! I thought Tess was going to smash the camera, and holy crap, you should have seen how fast Emil jumped over the couch to get to it. I think he might have been moved fast than you!"

Bart started to roll around on the couch while clutching his sides, "Can't...stop...laughing. Help...me!"

Standing next to Ollie, J'onn was smirking. It looked like he missed out on quite the party. Still, he couldn't help but feel like there had been a great deal of story left out. He glanced around the room for a second, a small smirk formed on his face.

'_Meh, what could be the harm?_' he shrugged.

He looked over at Lois and Clark talking by one of the monitors where she had pulled up something to do with the wedding. J'onn closed her eyes and began to focus on the two of them, using his powers to see...

_Tess advancing on Emil with a predatory gaze. Emil, still sober, was giving her a nervous look before shuffling over towards Clark. Chloe and Oliver were wrapped up on the couch, which caused Lois to glance over at her fiancee, who was drinking from the bottle._

_"Hey Smallville, I'm feeling a little cold over here," she purred._

_Clark let the bottle go with a 'pop' and looked over at her, oblivious to the fact that she was not actually implying she was cold._

_"Well, let me warm you up then, Dear," he replied._

_Lois grinned widely, expecting him to saunter over to her to give Chloe and Ollie a run for their money. After all, Lois and Clark were supposed to be the couple of the night, right? But Clark was clearly thinking literally. He narrowed his vision towards the fireplace and fired._

_There were shrieks all around as the wall above the mantle caught fire._

_"Whoops," muttered Clark with a laugh._

_Lois did her best to put out the flames near the fireplace. Apparently his aim was a little off in his current state, "Clark!"_

_"I'm sorry! You said you were cold," he laughed. Lois tried to wave off the fume lofting in front of her._

_Clark turned to see Emil filming them, "Hey!", he shouted as he latched onto the camera. "Uh...Lois-"_

_Lois turned to see him. She briefly wondered if he was losing his mind._

_"If you're watching this twenty years from now, just know that you are the love of my life."_

_She covered her mouth with her hand, though she wasn't sure if it was to hold back an 'aww' or to hold back a laugh at her fiancee's expense._

_Clark stumbled a bit, "Umm, I'm really feeling this."_

_As Clark walked past the couch, Oliver jumped up and started to make fun of him. "Look at me. I can set stuff on fire! Woooo..."_

_"Oh no, look at me!" Chloe said as she jumped to stand across from him squinting, "I can see your goodies with my x-ray vision!"_

_Lois rolled her eyes to look for Clark, but Emil handed her the camera as Oliver began to swirl around. He was trying to imitate Clark's 'blurring' technique. With a smirk, Lois decided she need to catch this on film. She giggled as Oliver latched onto Emil._

_"Alcohol doesn't...it doesn't...it doesn't even affect me," he laughed at Clark's expense while the girls laughed with him. He shot Chloe a pointed look as if to say 'I told you so' after she had mentioned earlier that Clark wasn't going to get drunk, a challenge that Oliver gladly accepted._

_Tess mockingly blew her 'super-breath' at the duo, causing Oliver to throw himself to the ground with Emil. __The girls erupted with laughter._

_"That's not what I was imagining," quipped Emil as Oliver laid across his chest._

_The girls lifted the boys to their feet, Lois struggled to keep the camera steady as she laughed._

_"I think it's time to get out on the town! You're already drunk, Ollie!" she laughed._

_Oliver let his jaw drop, "Why I have never!" he exclaimed dramatically._

_Just then, Clark burst through the door, "The limo is here!"_

_The gang cheered and they rushed out the front door to get into the limo-truck-hybrid they were riding in. They were barely down off of the Kent property when Clark pulled out two bottles of the enchanted champagne from his jacket._

_"Clark! Where did you get those!" laughed Lois._

_He gave her a sultry look, "Rule #1, Ms. Lane. Always protect your source!"_

_She rolled her eyes, "You are such a dork, Smallville. And it's always **know** your source!"_

_"I know you," he laughed as he muzzled into her neck._

_"Go Clark! Go Clark!"_

_He pulled back to see Oliver shaking his arms over his head, chanting. The group stared at him._

_"What? We're not drunk enough for stupidity yet?"_

_They laughed at him as he flashed a drunken, toothy grin. Tess started to pour each of them a glass, Clark had already drank his own and was asking for a second one. Lois giggled, 'I guess he doesn't know anything about limits' she thought about Clark's first drunken night._

_"Ooooohhh," moaned Clark. He was having far too much fun for his own good._

_They all suddenly turned on Emil. "Emil! Emil!"_

_Clark pushed a glass of champagne towards him, "Drink! Drink it! Drink!"_

_"Please, Emil?" purred Tess._

_He gave her a narrow eyed look, but surprisingly enough, he softened and took a long drink that caused Tess to chirp with delight. __Once Emil finished off his glass, Clark turned back to see Oliver leaning into his face. __"So, are you really made out of steel?"_

_Before Clark could respond, Chloe started to call for everyone's attention. "Hey! Hey! Hey!"_

_With all eyes on her, Chloe raised a glass._

_"I just want to say that my best friend, and my best cousin," Lois cheered, "getting married...is the best thing that's happened to our little group!"_

_"Hey!" whined Oliver, throwing his girlfriend a smirk._

_Chloe smacked him on the arm. "And I just want to say that I'm so proud of you two, and I know that we're going to look back years from now and say that this was what real love looked like. Because you two are constantly going at it!"_

_Clark blushed something crimson, so Lois reached across to pinch his cheek lovingly._

_"Whether that means that they're steaming up the copy room or Lois is trying to kill him!"_

_This got a laugh out of the group, but Oliver was busy looking at Chloe lovingly. Her speech ringing in his head. And then...he turned to Clark._

_"I have...the best idea...ever!"_

**_to be continued. . . ._**

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? hahaha. I think the best stuff comes next, haha, not to toot my own horn! It's just that the opportunity to set it at their little drunken wedding is too golden to not be awesome, right? hahaha. Anyways, I hope that you guys liked it. I tried my best to jot down the events of the night and the sequence of events to make a sort of framework for the night, hopefully it works!

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** '_Manhunter_' aka the continuation of '_Martian_'.


	99. Manhunter

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Thanks! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it, and I hope you like the rest!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I think they'll probably have a ton more footage. At least they better! hahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - I'm glad that you liked it! Though, I"m not sure, was he wearing red-k? I don't remember. If he was, then maybe there is a sliver of a chance that Clark Luthor might be more redeemable than I thought...hmmm...you bring up a great point, haha.

_**Katlynne (LoisClarkNLove)**_ - I don't know if I want to watch Jonathan beat up Clark either, haha. It's kind of going to be a huge 180 from his loving father role that we all know and love so much, haha. And yeah, Clark is more or less oblivious when he is sober, so he's gotta be so much worse when he is drinking, right? hahaha. I'm glad that I could make it make a little more sense, hahaha. Here is Part II!

**_cathy03_** - I figured that if anyone could have gotten through to him, it would have been Lois, so I made them connected way before. That's one of my favorite lines ever, haha, and yeah, Lana is a flimsy bike, hahaha. Lois is definitely a roaring Harley. I wish the whole gang had been there too! I was mildly disappointed that more of the gang wasn't there for the party! Hopefully this makes up for it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, I hope this part is up to expectations! haha. Here it is!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Emil/Tess

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #99, [Martian] Manhunter

**Author's Note:** And the fun continues!

**

* * *

**

_Chloe struggled to pull her gown over her head, Lois and Tess weren't much help as they flailed and giggled. When Chloe's head finally popped out the top, she was flushed and sweaty. Tess started to giggle uncontrollably._

_"What?" laughed Chloe. "What's so funny?"_

_Tess bent over, finding it difficult to breath, "You...you look...you look like a baby being...born...so...cute..."_

_Lois and Chloe exchanged goofy looks before breaking down themselves. The trio started to laugh until Emil knocked on the door, "You fine ladies ready to get this show on the road?" asked Emil, he was trying to do his best Elvis impersonation for them._

_Tess laughed the loudest before latching onto him, "You're like...the best doctor...ever."_

_"Well, Baby, I just do...what I do," he told her._

_"And what exactly is it that you can do, Mr. Hamilton?" she purred into his ear._

_Emil turned towards her, but Lois cut them off, "Hey you two, save it for later," Lois commanded. "Go check on the boys."_

_"I'll do it!" shouted Tess._

_She grabbed the camera from Emil and hit the power button, she was swerving around the hallways, listening for the boys._

_"Personally, I would prefer something more like this one."_

_That's when Tess walked into the men's bathroom with the camera in hand, Clark was showing Oliver a ring._

_"Oh, this is good. Look at this one. This one," started Clark, showing his fist._

_"Well, we're two different-" Oliver leaned back to avoid Clark's fist. "You're not thinking this through, okay? These are, these, what did this one cost you?"_

_Clark picked the ring out of Oliver's hand, "Nothing."_

_"That's a woman's ring! Alright? These are twenty dollar rings out of a vending machine. She deserves better than that," Oliver hiccuped, "better than that. Right?"_

_That's when Oliver noticed Tess standing in the doorway filming them, "How about a little privacy there, Blair Witch? Now."_

_Clark flashed her a toothy grin before Oliver pushed her back. He turned back to Clark, who seemed to be struggling to get the ring off of his finger now that it was on, "I wouldn't be caught dead in that thing," Oliver told him._

_Clark snorted, "It's stuck."_

_Oliver stood near the priest, waiting for Chloe and Clark to come out and walk down the aisle. His heart was in his throat, though he was quite certain that his current level of intoxication had little to do with it. He glanced over at Lois, the Maid of Honor, and noticed her mumbling something under her breath. He frowned, but quickly deduced what she was thinking. No small feat considering he was somewhat certain that there were two of her._

_"Stop thinking about that."_

_She turned, "What?"_

_"Stop thinking about us stealing your thunder and hoping she trips."_

_"I wasn't-"_

_He gave her a look of disbelief._

_"Fine. But I wasn't hoping that she tripped. I was hoping that Smallville would and take her down with him."_

_Oliver snorted, "Thanks for the support, Lois."_

_She rolled her eyes, "You know that there isn't anyone else I'd rather see my baby cousin with, Ollie."_

_Smiling a genuine smile, he almost blushed. "I'm happy for you and Clark too."_

_As the wedding march song keyed up, Oliver turned back to the front door as his bride and best-man approached. Chloe was giggling something faint at Clark, but quickly noticed the man she loved in a very bright green tuxedo. She almost fell over in laughter._

_Clark steadied her, "Chloe, I'm pretty sure you're supposed to be graceful right now."_

_"Psh, I...am...drunk, Clark Kent. Graceful is about seven glasses of bubbly behind me."_

_Oliver laughed from the alter as he overheard them. Lois had to wipe a tear from her eye as the duo approached. 'Good god, I better not be this much of a girl when me and Smallville tie the knot,' she considered before regaining her composure after a smile from Clark._

_The priest spoke up, "Do you, Oliver Queen, take Chloe Sullivan to be your lawful wedded wife?"_

_Oliver shot him a smirk, "Oh, yeah."_

_He gave him a sharp look, so Oliver corrected himself, "I mean, I do."_

_"Do you, Chloe Sullivan, take Oliver Queen to be your lawful wedded husband?"_

_Chloe stumbled a little bit, but Lois checked her back into play. "I sure do," she slurred._

_The priest smirked. "Then in the power invested in me by the state of Kansas, I pronounce you-"_

_Both Chloe and Oliver leaned in to jam their lips together at this point and the rest of the gang hooted and hollered. The priest just laughed and smiled, "I pronounce you husband and wife, you may...well...I guess you may keep kissing the bride."_

_Once they got outside, Oliver realized that he wanted to make this night extra special. He was Oliver Queen after all. He ran across the parking lot towards Lois, doing his best not to see his bride in her wedding dress. "I need your help," he told Lois._

_Grabbing her hand, they sprinted away from the group while Chloe whined, "Hey!"_

_The duo had barely made it around the corner when Lois pulled him to stop, "Where are we going?" she laughed._

_"I want to get Chloe something special! A wedding gift!"_

_Lois frowned, "Why didn't you just get something in-"_

_"That stuff isn't special enough, Legs. I'm not going to get her something out of the vending machine!"_

_"Well, it's the middle of the night! We're not going to find a place for you buy your shiny little gifts!"_

_Oliver let out a sigh, maybe Lois was right. But that's when he saw the large neon sign._

_"Follow me."_

_They sprinted down the street, Lois' heels clacking away. "Slow down!"_

_"I can't!"_

_Lois gritted her teeth, sped up, and jumped onto his back. "Lois, what are you doing?"_

_"Move it, Ollie!"_

_He rolled his eyes and continued on his way. When they busted through the doors, "Woah."_

_Lois looked around, "All the pretty lights," she muttered._

_"Welcome to the Fortune Casino," the greeter told them._

_A few hours later, Clark burst into his room but was disappointed to find that Lois was not home yet._

_"She's not up here either, Chloe!" he shouted downstairs._

_He sat down on the edge of the bed and look at a picture of him and Lois when Chloe walked in. "Dammit, Clark!"_

_Clark looked up at her with a surprised look, Chloe jumped up on the bed. "How are you not freaking out right now?"_

_"Chloe, I'm sure that they'll be back soon enough. Oliver isn't going to let anything happen to them."_

_She looked at him with a glare. "You should be freaking out like me! Don't you care that your fiancee is missing? That my husband is missing?"_

_Clark rolled his eyes, "I do care, Chloe. But I know that Ollie will keep her face. I'm not worried."_

_Chloe started to jump on the bed, waving her arms in the air franticly._

_"I want my husband! I want my husband! I want my husband!"_

_Before she knew it, Clark was standing up with her. He was trying to calm her down, but she grabbed onto his arms and laughed, "This is so much fun!" she squealed. Clark let out a laugh, if it made her calm down. He'd jump with her._

_What they weren't counting on was that Clark's bed was very old. And very...er...worn in...by Lois and Clark. It broke._

_"Whoa!"_

_Chloe fell backwards into the closest, Clark lost his balance and fell onto the middle of the bed. He leaned up and glanced at her feet in the air._

_"You ok, Chlo?"_

_"Yeah, I'm...I'm fine. I'm just going to lay here for a while."_

_Clark laid back onto his back and blinked a few times, "Yeah...me too."_

_Before they knew it, they were asleep._

_Lois and Oliver found themselves in a rough part of town. _

_Lois had been cheated out of her engagement ring, punched the guy who had cheated her out of her engagement ring, and Oliver had to carry her over his shoulder to keep her from getting killed by the guy who had cheated her out of her engagement ring._

_"Really? Did you have to punch him? Have you forgotten your big girl words?"_

_She rolled her eyes, "Are you serious, Ollie? That tool cheated-_

_"You out for your engagement ring. I know, Legs. You keep saying it."_

_"Then why are you so surprised that I was going to put a dent in his big shiny chrome dome?"_

_Oliver let out a sigh, "I don't know? Maybe it was the dozen or so thugs with guns? We're not all made out of steel, you know?"_

_"I am not a damsel in distress, thank you very much. I could have handled it on my own."_

_"Uh huh, you keep telling yourself that."_

_"You don't believe me?"_

_Oliver groaned, "Please tell me that you're not going to ask me to-"_

_"You wanna fight? Huh?"_

_"Fine. Ask me that. No, Lois. I don't want to fight."_

_She pulled up her fists and started to dance around him, "Float like a butterfly, string like a bee, Greenjeans."_

_"I'm not going to fight you, Legs."_

_"What? You chicken? Is the Green Arrow scared of a girl?"_

_"Ok, first, it's just Green Arrow. Not **the** Green Arrow. I'm not your boyfriend-"_

_"Fiancee."_

_Oliver closed his eyes, composing himself with a smirk, "I'm not your fiancee, I don't need the 'the'. Second, if I say that I'm not scared of a girl, you're going to hit me because I'm saying that girls can't hold themselves in a fight with a guy. And if I say that I am, you're going to-"_

_He fell to the ground as Lois hit him square in the face. Smacking his head against the ground, he muttered, "...hit me..." before passing out._

_Lois danced around, holding her fist in pain. "He's got a face like a rock!"_

_She continued to dance around before her heel got stuck, causing her to fall next to Oliver and also smack her head._

_"Ouch..." she whispered before passing out herself._

_Meanwhile, the last couple had just entered the Editor's office at the Daily Planet._

_Tess sauntered over to the desk. She tuned back to look at Emil with a very suggestive expression. Brushing each of her shoulder straps off her shoulder, she let her dress fall to the ground to leave just a thin...silky...far too sexy for her own good...piece of lingerie._

_"And when did you acquire that, Ms. Mercer," he asked with a sultry smile._

_She eyed him like a lion about to pounce on a gazelle. "I think that the more important question is...when are you going to even the score?"_

_Emil smiled at her as his hands ran down his shirt, unbuttoning each button at a slow pace. Tess let out a satisfied growl. As his hands drifted down to his belt buckle, "Is this what you had in mind?" he asked with a dangerous look._

_"I think that I can work with it," she told him with an equally sultry smile._

_He let his pants fall to the ground, picking up the champagne bottle as he stepped each let out._

_"Come on, show me what you got, Doctor!"_

_Emil was standing in Tess' office in his boxers, laughing while trying to pour some champagne out. "No, no, no," he laughed while Tess giggled._

_"Show me what you got!" she teased._

_He laughed, "You can't handle what I've got!" he retorted before dancing back and forth._

_"Yeah!" she laughed._

_Throwing the empty glass away with a crash, Emil started to laugh and advance on her. "Cut it out, give it over, Babydoll."_

_Emil snatched the camera away and started to film Tess, "Show me what you got."_

_Tess started to model for him, shaking her hips from side-to-side. Emil nodded his head, "Oh, don't be coy honey. Come on."_

_She quickly snatched the camera back, and they fell to the table. After a few moments of hesitate, their lips met in a fury._

"Woah!" shouted J'onn, which caused the room to stop and stare at him.

He looked around awkwardly at them before coughing and shaking his head, "Choco's went down...down the wrong hole."

"Do martians even have wrong holes?" quipped Oliver.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? hahaha. That was way longer than i thought it was going to be, hahaha. I should have split it a little more evenly, but I hadn't written this chapter yet, so yeah, haha. Sorry about it being so long! Not that I suspect I'll hear complaints, haha.

I hope everyone likes it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I know exactly what chapter it's going to be, but I want it to be a surprise! haha, sue me!


	100. Grandpa Kent

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Aww, haha. That's so nice of you to say! haha. It took me a while to map it out, but I got there, haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you got the Chocos reference! hahaha. I was wondering if people would know what that was, haha.

**_alexindigo_** - I'm glad that it was so well received! haha. Everyone has their own imagined events of the night, so it's tough to live up to everyone's expectations, but everyone seems to have liked it! hahaha. That's a win in my book!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I kind of figured that I would need to add some sort of finale to it, haha. And I had J'onn jump out because honestly, I can't even begin to imagine how Emil and Tess got from their office to the club, but I assume that they weren't sleeping, hahaha. That is probably the far more realistic answer to why the bed gave out, but I kind of preferred the other one, haha, I dunno about you, hahaha.

I left out the Lemur and the "save" part because it seemed more interesting to follow Oliver and Lois, and I figure those events took place at the same time, haha. Plus, I wasn't sure what I could write about the Lemur beyond...he was there, haha.

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad that you liked it and I'm super-glad that you think that! hahaha. Maybe I'll win the lottery and start my own Smallville-sequel show, haha, I can dream, can't I? haha.

_**k3josai**_ - Thanks! That speech is one of my all-time favorites, second to perhaps the "Oh, so we're friends now?" speech. I just loved their back and forth in that scene because it's pure Clois fun to me, haha. Even if it wasn't as romantic (or romance-implied) as the Harley Scene, it still makes me smile!

_**cathy03**_ - Hahaha, I don't think he saw most of that coming, haha. I love the idea that the Lemur is riding Shelby like a horse or something, hahaha, my dog would be absolutely mesmerized by a lemur, hahaha. I loved Emil as well! haha. It was his big night!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #100, Grandpa Kent

**Author's Note:** We've finally hit the 100 mark, wow. And it's extra long because hopefully, it'll be extra special. Enjoy!

**

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**

Jo'an Lane-Kent was grumpy.

Now, that's a bit of an understatement because there is normal people grumpy, and then there is Lane grumpy. Wild guess on which one is worse.

Every year on this day, the Kent Farm was quiet. Why? Because this was the anniversary of Jonathan Kent's death. Jo'an had never gotten the chance to meet her grandfather and all of her Dad's stories were lame. At least to her they were. So there she was. Kicking around the old Loft.

'_I don't get why all the stories have to be such...such...baby stories,_' she fumed. '_All anybody ever says is that Grandpa Kent was a great man. That he was a nice man. But nobody ever tells me what he was **like**. Like how Uncle Ollie is such a flirt. Or how Uncle Jimmy is such a dork._'

She plopped down on the old couch. '_Why can't anybody every tell me what he was really like? I want to know..._'

Jo'an sat there for a while kicking her feet as they didn't quite reach the ground below. She didn't like how her parents were on this day. '_Dad works too hard and is gone too much. And Mom is too quiet,' she pondered. 'She doesn't even tease Daddy today. They weren't themselves._'

She stood up and opened her Dad's trunk. She knew that there was a picture of her grandfather in there somewhere. She found the picture of her Grandpa, he was sitting on the front porch of the house. She smiled softly at his big smile. And then she saw it.

The Legion Ring.

Jo'an picked it up carefully, making sure not to slip the ring onto her finger, and watched it glimmer in the setting sun's light. She knew exactly what this particular item was. She had met some of her Daddy's friends from the future, and they all had these rings. '_It's how they got here,_' Clark explained.

The silly one...Garth, she remembered...had told her that if they wore the rings, they just had to think real hard on where they wanted to go and the ring would take them there. Jo'an cautiously peeked over her shoulder to see if her mother had come looking for her yet.

Taking the ring and walking back to the couch, Jo'an started to wonder. '_Maybe I can...just this once?_'

She could already hear her mother, '_You don't need a Legion Ring, because if you use it, I'm going to kick your butt into next week!_' she imagined with an eye roll. Her mother was all bark. '_Just like she was with Daddy. Says she's going to kill him, and then she kisses him. Silly grown ups,_' she giggled.

"If I go back right before I meet Grandpa, then he won't remember, and nobody needs to know."

Jo'an slipped the ring on her finger and thought hard about the picture in the frame, when she opened her eyes, she was still in the Loft.

"Stupid thing. Doesn't even work," she muttered.

"Clark? Lois? You two up there?" a man hollered from down below.

She froze as she heard the stairs creak, '_Who was in our barn? Mom is inside! Why didn't he go to the house?_' she considered wildly.

"You two better not be-" the man stopped talking when he saw Jo'an.

Jo'an frowned.

"Hey there, who are you?" he asked kindly. Jo'an figured he was being careful not to startle her.

"I'm Jo'an," she replied.

As he stepped into the setting sunlight, she saw his face. The man was Jonathan Kent, her Grandpa Kent.

"Well, Jo'an, are you a friend of Clark's? Or maybe Lois?"

She didn't know what to say, she was still in shock. It had worked. "Kind of."

Jonathan frowned slightly as he knelt down to her eye level, "Kind of?"

"They're...not really friends...as much as...family?"

He smiled warmly, "I see you three must of made fast friends."

Jo'an misunderstood him and smiled wildly, "Oh, me and Daddy are fast alright. Just not as fast as Bobo."

"Daddy? Bobo?"

"Yeah?"

He shook his head, "Who is Bobo?"

"Uh...Oh, you mean his real name? Bart. He's my uncle, but Mommy hates when I call him Uncle Bobo. She doesn't like him very much. He eats all of our food and she gets mad. But Grandma likes him. And oh! You know him too! He told me how he saved you once!"

Jonathan was very confused. "You've got to slow down, Sweetie. Who is your Daddy?"

"Clark Kent."

He let out a laugh, "I don't think that's possible, Sweetie."

That's when Jo'an realized in all of her excitement, she forgot to explain who she was. "Uh...I'm from the future," she blurted out.

At first, he thought maybe the little girl was letting her imagination run wild. But then he noticed her eyes. And the way her nose looked. He leaned back and he saw a flicker of something else. Something familiar. "Jo'an, if you're from the future, and your Daddy is Clark Kent, who is your Mommy?"

"Lois Lane-Kent."

Jonathan almost fell over. "You're joking, right?"

Jo'an raised her eyebrows and and didn't seem to get what was so funny, "Nope."

"Clark Kent and Lois Lane are-"

"Kent."

He gave her a funny look, so she explained, "Lois Lane-Kent."

"Ok then..." he started again, he was starting to see the resemblance to Lois. "...Clark Kent and Lois Lane-_Kent_ are your parents?"

"Yep."

Jonathan let out a laugh, "I believe your Grandmother owes me some cherry cobbler then."

She frowned, not really understanding what that meant, but smile with him al the same. His smile was infectious like that. Jo'an had led him off into the fields, telling him that nobody else could see her. He agreed as they walked for a bit until they got to a spot where a tree would grow in the future.

"...and macoroni, and pizza, and french fries..." she grabbed Jonathan's hand, "..._especially_...french fries."

He laughed, "You have a lot of favorite foods, Sweetie."

"Well, I'm a _growing_ girl, Grandpa," she told him with an eye-roll and a smirk.

Jonathan melted at her last word. _Grandpa_. He liked that. He liked that _a lot_.

"So...what's your dad like?"

Jo'an smiled warmly, "He's...Dad," she laughed. "He always wants to save everybody...and he does. He's Superman. Everyday, people ask for help...and he finds a way to help them. Mommy says he's Earth's Greatest Hero. That makes Uncle Ollie and Uncle Bruce jealous though," she giggled.

"Uncles?"

"They're not _real_ uncles. They're Dad's best friends. They're his family."

Jonathan grinned. "So, he's not alone?"

"No way! He has so many friends! Aunt Chloe is always saying I have too many uncles and aunts," she laughed. "And of course, he has Mom. When he wants to make her blush? He tells her that she makes him even stronger than the sun does," she whispered like it was a secret.

He let out a laugh, who knew his son would ever be that smooth? "And your mom is Lois Lane, huh?"

"You say that like it's weird," she said with a confused look.

"It's just that right now..." he hesitated, not sure how to explain Lois and Clark's relationship.

"She wants to kill him?" she offered.

Jonathan chuckled, "And what would make you say that?"

"Because that's what they're like where I'm from." Jonathan smiled warmly. "Mommy walks around and pretends like she doesn't like Daddy very much, but everyone knows better. She tells him that she's going to kill him, and then he says something sweet, and then she rolls her eyes, and that _always_ makes Dad laugh," she explained to him, Jonathan hanging on every word. "And then they kiss, sometimes they go wrestle in their room."

Jonathan frowned, '_Wrestle? What does...oh...,_' he blushed.

"Grandma always tells me that no matter how much it looks like it, Mom loves Dad more than anything."

He grinned, "Grandma says that, huh? How is she in the future?"

"She's a senator!"

Jonathan's jaw dropped, "A senator?"

"Yup," she said, making a popping sound with the 'P'.

"All the Kents are heroes. Dad is Superman. Grandma is a senator. Mommy is the best reporter in the whole wide world. Aunt Kara is Supergirl. The Gramps is a General. But you know what Dad always says..." Jo'an puffed out her chest and pulled a single strand of hair over her forehead. Jonathan laughed, not understanding why she was doing that, "..._Jonathan Kent was the greatest hero I've ever known_," she said in a deep voice.

That stopped Jonathan's laughter in it's tracks. He looked away shyly, "He really says that?"

"All the time," she told him with a smile.

The two walked some more, enjoying a comfortable silence between granddaughter and grandfather, occasionally talking about her school and. Jo'an glanced up to see the sun setting. "I think it's time for me to go home, Grandpa."

Jonathan smiled down at her before picking her up to give her a hug. "It was wonderful to meet you, sweetie. I'll never forget you."

She giggled and smiled shly when he set her down. He wasn't going to remember her. She was going to go back to right before her grandpa saw her, and then she was going to go to the future. Then nothing would change. She didn't like the idea of not saving him, but her dad had told her about the trouble that comes with time-travel. He still believed that time-travel robbed them of Grandpa Kent in the first place. Jo'an gave him one last look.

"Bye, Grandpa."

His eyes were watery, "Goodbye, Jo'an."

Jo'an closed her eyes and thought hard about right before he saw her. Look around, she did the same thing and thought about right before she left.

When she opened her eyes, she saw the Loft again. But older.

She let out a sigh and sat down on the couch. She was going to miss her grandpa. Then she remembered she needed to do something. Jo'an peeked around, keeping an eye out for her parents. Placing the Legion Ring back in the chest, she smiled a satisfied smirk.

'_Grandpa Kent might not remember meeting me..._' she considered. '_But I definitely remember meeting him and I'll never forget what he was like..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that for #100? I wanted to do something special, and I thought the idea of Jo'an meeting Jonathan Kent could be as special as it gets. Hence it's extra length. I didn't want to shave off a single moment, haha. I actually wanted to write more! haha.

Time Travel is awful tricky to wrap your head around, especially when you're writing about it, haha, so I went with the Back to the Future idea from the second film that Jo'an could go back and visit her grandfather without changing history, but she would have to go back to before he saw her before going back to the future in order to make him forget meeting her...if that makes sense? hahaha. Like I said, it's tricky!

And wow, 100 chapters. Who would have thought it would have become this when I started it roughly 100 days ago? haha. I just wanted to take a minute to thank all of you readers because it's you guys that keep me at it. I appreciate everyone sticking with me for the long haul and hopefully in the future. This has completely exceeded my expectations, and I have been having a blast writing for you guys! Thanks!

Anyways, i hope you guys liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Wonder Girl._


	101. Wonder Girl

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - Hahaha, I'm sorry! I liked imagining her doing her Superman impression too, hahaha. Mini-Lois pretending to be Superman? haha. That's just a cute picture in my head, haha. I'm glad that you liked it! And yes, Back to the Future is the time-travel guide for all, isn't it? hahaha. Great Scott!

**_alexindigo_** - I didn't think there was a 100, who am I to think there won't be a 100 more? hahaha. I think deep down he was hoping for it as well, Lois and Martha are just too similar and Martha has told her that multiple times. Im glad that you like them! haha. I worry about keeping them true in terms of dialogue and character, but at the same time, we all want to see something new, so that means a lot!

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, I don't know if I could control myself if I had the chance either! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it! And I'm especially glad to hear that you thought Jo'an and Jonathan's conversation was natural and sweet, because that's what I was going for!

**_Kinnari3_** - Awww, that means so much to me! haha. I'm glad that I've been able to give you something to look forward to, I know I always look forward to hearing what everyone thinks! I thought that it was important to have Jo'an tell him (whether she realizes how big of a deal it is or not) how much he meant to Clark, and I'm glad that you liked how it came about! Don't have to wait much longer, here is #101!

_**s01itaire90**_ - Haha, yeah, but if I let him remember, who knows what happens? Maybe Jonathan kicks Clark in the butt when he starts drifting off to LanaLand and then _everything_ changes. I mean, what if Clark makes a move too soon? Maybe Lois turns him down and we never get Clois! Oh god, I don't want to imagine that! hahaha. At least Jo'an will always remember her Grandpa Kent, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I remember when I thought I was only going to write about a dozen chapters or so, hahaha. Oh boy, I was way off, haha. I have given up trying to predict when they will end, I'm just going to enjoy it while it lasts, haha.

**_A,sky_** - I'm glad that you liked it And yeah, it's a treat anytime I get to write Papa-K, haha. I love that guy to death! I assume you're referring to Amy Adams, and I have to admit, I didn't see it coming. My top choice was always Olivia Wilde, though a friend of mine did open my eyes to Sophia Bush, but I'm sure that Amy Adams will do well. She's a good actress, it's just all about how they go about portraying her.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, implied Conner/Cassie, mentions of Kara/Bart, and mentions Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #101, Wonder Girl

**Author's Note:** It's going to be hard to top that last chapter, haha, but I'll let this one give it a go. Btw, this chapter will feature the Conner Kent that we met in previous chapters and not the Alexander Luthor version of Superboy. For now, I'm leaving Alexander/Conner as if he was AU.

**

* * *

**

Clark and Kara were standing in the backyard, trying the best not to laugh.

"Shut up," Conner told them.

They shared glances, "It's not...you just have to get the feel for it," explained Clark.

"The first time I tried to teach Kal-El to fly, he crashed through the roof of the barn. It's ok that it's not happening right away."

Conner climbed to his feet and brushed the dirt off his front. Needless to say, the flying lessons weren't going great. Conner had been Superboy for a while now, but he still hadn't managed to fly. He was more of a Blur-Boy at this point. He wasn't a fan of that.

"I just want to be a part of the team," he told them. "I just want to fly like you guys can."

"Maybe you should invest in a jet like I did."

The Kents turned to see Diana Prince and a blonde companion walked along side of her.

"Hey..." muttered Clark, "...I didn't see you guys come up."

"Think about it for a minute, Clark," smirked Diana.

He frowned, "Invisible Jet. Got it."

Diana smiled at him, "I wanted to introduce you guys to the latest member of the Paradise Island family."

The blonde girl stepped forward.

"This...is Cassandra Sandsmark."

Kara smiled fondly at the girl, having met her when she last visited the Amazons.

Clark gave her a strong smile and shook her hand, "Welcome to the family," he greeted.

Conner was a little less comfortable.

"Uh...h...hi. I'm uh..." He paused, '_who am I again?_', "...Kent. I mean Conner. I mean Conner Kent."

Cassie laughed at his nervousness, "It's nice to meet you, Conner Kent."

"...uh...yeah."

Clark looked at Conner with a disbelieving smirk. "You ok, Bud?"

"What!" he shouted defensively, which caused everyone to look at him oddly. "I mean, I'm good. I'm good."

Diana gave Conner a funny look while Cassie blushed.

"We're trying to help Conner learn to fly," explained Kara.

"Oh, well, I can feel your pain. My mother is still on my case about destroying the roof of the royal palace."

Conner let out a laugh, "I hear Clark wrecked the barn."

"Hey," Clark turned, "Kara was talking about butterflies and all kinds of crazy talk."

Kara's jaw dropped as she let out a laugh, "Kal-El!"

"It's true!"

Diana and Cassie laughed as Kara and Clark bickered like siblings, Conner's gaze hadn't left Cassie. "Well, you're a bad student!" laughed Kara.

"Alright you two, we were heading to Gotham from Star City-"

"I bet you are," teased Kara.

Diana blushed crimson. "Anyways!" she laughed, "I wanted to stop by and say hello. Is Lois inside?"

Kara nodded, "I'll go with you. Sometimes it takes two of us to keep Lois at bay right now."

"Is it sad that I'm Wonder Woman, and yet, I'm still a little scared?"

"Only if it's sad that I'm her husband and I am a little scared sometimes," joked Clark.

Diana and Kara led Cassie towards the barn, "How are things going with Bart?" questioned Diana. Conner and Clark stayed rooted to their spot, but then Cassie glanced back to give Conner a sassy smile and a wink. Conner was stunned and speechless until the door closed.

"Yeah. I definitely have a thing for blondes."

Clark looked up, "Really? I've always had a thing for brunettes."

Conner nodded his head and shrugged, "Well, maybe it's one of those, you know, opposite of our moms kind of thing?"

"What?"

"Well, your mom is blonde. So, you go for the opposite. Brunette. Like Lois. And well, Lois is kind of my mother-figure, so I dig blondes."

Clark frowned, "But I didn't know my mother was blonde until I was in my twenties..."

The other Kent quirked his head, Clark had a point. But that's when another idea hit him.

"Maybe since your mom was all comforting, you find brunettes comforting. Lois is kind of...you know...violent, so I find blondes comforting. Like Chloe. Chloe has always been like my nice mother, Lois has always been my...you know...kick my ass mother."

Clark was about to defend his wife's kindness when, "Smallville! Where the hell did you put the remote!" there were a few moments of silence. "Sorry! It was on the other side of my belly! I couldn't see it! Love you!"

He grimaced, as did Conner. "Yeah, Lois has been a little uh...touchy...in her pregnancy..."

"Yeah. Touchy. That was definitely the word I was going to use."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. In case you missed it, the whole remote thing was the 'kill me-or-kiss me' moment, haha. I wanted to introduce Cassie at some point and this felt like a good time to do it, haha. Also, it sets up Conner's story and eventually Conner and Cassie's story for my post-'Kill me or Kiss Me' story (no throwing things, people! hahaha. We all know it has to end _someday_! hahaha.)

Anyways, I hope you guys liked pregnant Lois and watching Clark and Kara teaching Conner. Shoot me a review, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Prom_.


	102. Prom

**Review Comments:**

**_s01itaire90_** - Haha, I think that it's safe to say that they are! haha. I'm glad that you liked Cassie and Conner, in the comics she was with both Conner and Tim Drake, so it's a bit of a toss-up depending on which pairing you prefer. So, I'm chalking that up as a win for me, haha. I'm not sure that Jonathan won't know how Clark's life turns out, but if he does (as we had in 'Jonathan'), it'll be as a ghost. So, there's always that?

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad to hear that you'll stick with me for at least a little while longer, haha. I do have some ideas for that story all set out, but I'm having plenty of fun doing this right now, so I'm in no hurry, haha. We're still on a timeline, hahaha, I've got it all sorted out, but this is when she is pregnant with Jo'an. I'll have to introduce the second baby here soon, I just haven't gotten around to deciding how to do it.

I'm content with Amy Adams. I'm not so much worried about her or her acting as much as I am with the direction I've seen so far. I love Zack Snyder to death, as an aspiring film maker myself, I'm very much so in love with the visuals he has put together (Dawn of the Dead, 300, Watchmen). But at the same time, I see a lot of big names and not a lot of talk about story. I love his work, but at the same time, none of it fits the tone or the story style that I want to see for Superman. Hopefully, he knows that and goes in a new direction, but right now, I'm a little worried.

And btw, no one will ever top Erica Durance, hahaha. I love that picture as well with Lois in Clark's clothes, but at the same time, doesn't he look kind of odd in that brown jacket? I'm kind of worried that's not Clark Kent. I'm worried that's Clark Luthor. And Lois doesn't know. Which would be a horrible choice on the part of the Smallville writers, because Lois should know. But at the same time, it's kind of like Bizarro and Lana all over again.

**_A,sky_** - Haha, I think I can suffer through you repeating yourself if it means it's because you liked the chapter! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked Clark and Kara's little spout, haha. I was kind of inspired by a re-run of 'Fierce' and Kara was teasing him.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I might have to file them under 'Horror' though, hahaha. I see lots of Lois Lane ass-kicking going on, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that you liked that bit, haha. I was wondering if someone would call me out as sexist or something, haha. "How dare you judge women on one superficial detail, Captain!" haha. Boys certainly will be boys. I think that it's kind of a, "If Clark is scared of her then we better be scared of her" kind of thing, hahaha. If the Big Guns retreat at a Lois Lane threat, then everybody else better do the same! haha.

**_Callista Wolfwood_** - I'm glad that you like them! As a comic book fan that enjoys all the adaptions we've seen, I know that I want something that's true to the source material while showing us something brand new. So, when I started writing this, I figured I should add new stuff while being mindful to the show and it's tone. Hopefully I'm doing that, haha. 102 chapters and counting, I like to think that I am, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #102, Prom

**Author's Note: **Takes place during Season 4's '_Spirit_', please don't find where I live and kill me, hahaha.

* * *

Clark pushed his way through the crowd, looking for his nemesis in pink so that he could explain a few things before she killed him in his sleep. He noticed her near the punch. She looked like she was bored out of her mind. "Lois...look-"

"Your parents filled me in," she explained. "Apparently some girl named Dawn was possessing me?"

"Yeah, well, that's the short version."

Lois shrugged it off, "Yeah, well, it's the last time I let her do my hair."

"Look, I'm sorry you got pulled into all this."

"Don't worry about it. I never quite made it to my senior prom," she told him as she took a drink. "The punch could use a little kick."

Clark couldn't help but smile. Lois always seemed to know the right thing to say. He looked away shyly and she made an awkward face as they both fell silent, but suddenly, the silence was filled by the band playing up a slow song. And suddenly, Clark Kent had a crazy idea.

"You know I was thinking, since you did get all dressed up and you came here with me..."

Lois watched as he gathered the courage to ask a simple question. Though she found herself surprised as she mentally urged him on.

"...you should at least get a dance out of it."

She gave him a funny look, "Are you sure you can handle this, Smallville?"

"I think the better question is...can you keep up, Lane?"

"Oh, oh, oh, you just asked for it, Kent," she said, extending her hand out to him.

Clark smirked right back at her, "You bet I did."

Grabbing her hand, he led her out onto the dance floor. They shared an awkward moment of deciding which hands went where, but soon found themselves swaying to the music. "You know, Smallville, you're a better dance- OW! THOSE WERE MY FEET!"

Clark smiled shyly, "I'm sorry," he muttered.

Lois sucked in a breath, "I am so going to kick your ass later."

"Here..." He pulled her close so that she would stand on the top of his feet, "...lets just try this."

She gasped at their proximity, but quickly composed herself with a smirk.

"Don't get any ideas, Smallville. I'm only dancing this close to you to save my feet."

Clark laughed, "I wouldn't think of it."

They danced like that for a few moments, but suddenly, Clark felt brave again.

"You know, for someone who keeps complaining about being in pink...you look pretty good in it."

Lois smirked, "Are you trying to flirt with me, Mr. Kent?"

"Are you letting me, Ms. Lane?"

She had to admit. That was smooth.

"Maybe I just want to see you get out of your plaid decorated box for a night."

He grinned wildly, "Deny it all you want, Lois, I've seen you wear my shirts before."

"Hey, it gets cold in your room sometimes. Sometimes I need something to keep me warm."

"I'm warm."

Lois felt her jaw drop. "Excuse me?"

Clark blushed a fierce crimson. "I meant that I'm warm when I'm in there."

She let out a laugh at his nervousness. And she was definitely not thinking about how warm he would be...to her. Definitely not.

"And besides, I think...you just like _my_ plaid."

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

Clark smirked, "Perhaps, Lois Lane is comforted by that Clark Kent aroma."

"You wish, Smallville. And speaking of aroma, maybe you should invest in this new fangled product: deodorant? It would keep your shirts less ripe."

"If they are so bad, why do you wear them then?" He saw her open her mouth, knowing the cold-in-his-room defense was on the top of her tongue, "And don't say that you get cold. I've lugged your bags around enough times to know you have a dozen sweat shirts."

Lois closed her mouth and blushed lightly, "Shut your face, Kent."

"That's what I thought," he smirked.

He expected a snappy retort, but she smiled back at him. The fire in their eyes seemed destined to burn the other it burned so hot, which wasn't as much of a joke in his case. Clark made the first movement, much to Lois' delight. And as they neared each other, he could feel her breath on his lips.

Then, Clark felt something click and he opened his eyes.

He was standing with Lois at the punch bowl. He could hear the band just beginning the song that he could have sworn he was swaying with Lois to a few seconds ago. He looked at her, and then looked away. "You know I was thinking, since you did get all dressed up and you came here with me..."

Lois glanced over to see Lana Lang walk through the door, and she squashed any mental urging she had been doing.

"...you should at least get a dance out of it."

"Chivalry noted...but uh, I'm not the one you want to dance with, Clark." Lois glanced to the door, "She is."

Clark saw her from across the room. It was hard not to, she was wearing a white dress. He had to admit, a part of him wanted to ask Lana to dance. A big part of him. But there was also a part of him that wanted to stay here with Lois. When he looked back, she told him to go.

He smiled at her and made his way over to Lana, but cast a look back at Lois. She was looking down. And in that moment, he felt something deep inside of himself that he had never felt before. But as he watched Lois walk towards Chloe, he figured he'd think about it later.

Lois gave Clark and Lana a look from across the room, and then noticed the sadness on her cousin's face.

'_I might be a little butt-hurt_,' she thought, '_but I know I made the right decision telling him to go. I couldn't live with Chloe looking at me like that_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Obviously, it had to end in a way that left us Clois-ers unsatisfied. I mean, Clark went off with Lana (ugh) and Lois sat at the single ladies table with Chloe. But hopefully I managed to make it at least seem that Clark felt a pang of guilt about it, and Lois felt something but was squashing it for Chloe's sake as we more or less implied during 'Metropolis University'. It felt wrong to try and ignore the fact that Lana was the girl he wanted, because as much as it pains us Clois-ers, she was. No doubt about it. So I have to let him walk away from Lois.

All in all, I just wanted to write a chapter where Lois and Clark had their dance, haha. This is what I came up with. The ending was tough, but at least we got to have the beginning and the middle, right? haha. I hope you liked a call back to a very special dance that they will share six years later.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I think it will be '_Mr. Mxyzptlk._'


	103. Mr Mxyzptlk

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, I loved the scene where Clark crashed through the roof of the barn! I had to add a flying lesson scene to a chapter! There are two different Wonder Girls (Imagine that. Multiple versions of one character, hahaha). One is Donna Troy, the original Wonder Girl, and the other is Cassie Sandsmark. I'm more of a fan of Cassie because Donna Troy is a headache that I can't even begin to explain, hahaha.

I haven't seen any of the Young Justice episodes yet, but luckily (or unluckily? haha), I more or less grew up in a comic book shop. And I've always been a big Dick Grayson fan, so I've kept an eye on the Teen Titans (he wasn't in Young Justice until this TV show) and that brings in the other young guys.

Haha, shucks. I think that I'll always do my best to stay true to the storyline, with the exception of Conner Kent. I didn't see that one coming, haha. At least not at first and not by the time I introduced Conner in this story. But yeah, he had to go to Lana. I wasn't going to change that. And at the time, it was a good moment for Lois and Clark on a friendship level. Though I did feel bad for Chloe as well.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I've said it before, I'll say it again, haha, I was rooting for Lana to die as soon as Lois showed up, haha. That being said, the Lana character is a fine character and understand her importance to the Clark Kent character. You could say that the struggles that Clark goes through with Lana made him a better fit for Lois. And ultimately, it was their long friendship that has made them the great couple they are now.

Now that I've got that bad taste in my mouth, haha, I will say that I very much agree. Once she got with Lex, I hated her, haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - I know! I know! hahaha. I'm sorry! But it had to be done! haha. I would have killed to have just left it in that fantasy world, but I couldn't bring myself to go AU like that, haha. I'm glad that you liked the flirting, I was pretty proud of it, haha. It suited that moment.

_**Katlynne**_ - That goofy smile was arguably my favorite part of their drunk night, hahaha. I love drunk Oliver! haha. I can't wait to finish writing St. Patricks Day so I can write him again, WHOOPS, did I just let a spoiler drop? hahaha. I had to write him as a Clois-er! hahaha. The Kent Men know what's up, haha, I just know it! haha. I'm glad that you liked her big adventure to visit her Grandpa Kent! haha. I really want to write those two together again!

I think that's got a lot of potential going forward, haha. I think teen Conner is a blast to write. And yeah, pregnant Lois is just a blast to write! haha. What? You can't give me the puppy dog eyes! haha. How am I supposed to say no to that! hahaha. I dropped that nemesis line just for you, haha. I wanted to write a scene where he did dance with her, so it had to be in her imagination, I too wish that we could have seen Clois sooner.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Thank you! At least it's not going to end anytime soon? haha. I think there are at least 50 more chapters to go. So, we've got a ways to go before this show is over! hahaha. Yeah, I heard about the wrap as well, it's a little heart breaking, isn't it?

What Lois and Clark don't know wont' hurt them, haha. Jo'an covered her tracks well, haha. I'm glad that it was up to the mark for #100. And I'm glad that Wonder Girl went over well! Part of that scene between Clark and Conner comes from Lionel talking about how Lex is predisposed to like brunettes, so that kind of inspired the idea. As well as the mere fact that my dad always tells me I like insane girls because my mother (his ex-wife, haha) is insane, hahaha.

I know that it's hard to see Lana like that, haha. I'm trying so hard not to refer to her with your nickname, haha. The Lana-Lovers will find me and hurt me if I do, hahaha. I'm glad that you were able to enjoy it all the same. It's hard for me to keep him with Lana, haha.

_**anacaro**_ - I like to think that Lois brings out of the confident side of Clark, haha. I've never seen him talk to someone with as much confidence as he does when he's talking to Lois. Even in Season 4, that banter-y side of him hadn't been revealed until Lois came along.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it! And shhh! hahaha. I never said that! hahaha. They're going to get me now! haha. I think I'm going to leave my personal jury out on the new Superman movie until I see a trailer or at least the costume. I think that will say a lot. It sounded like Snyder thought the classic Christopher Reeve suit was wrong for the movie, and since I was hoping for a hybrid of the Superman Returns suit and the Classic suit, I wonder what he is planning on doing. After seeing what Tim Burton wanted to do, another visual director, I'm worried about that. And the suit will set the tone I think.

I really hope that it's not Clark Luthor, but I have a bad feeling. I agree, the scene from Luthor should imply that she would know, but I'm still worried.

**_sasslady_** - It's funny that you should say that, '_Homecoming_' is coming up soon! Actually, i think it's the chapter after the next one. I agree that even though we all seem to have hated Lana, haha, I think that Clark had to endure it to become the kind of partner that he is now. I get what you mean about Erica Durance, she is really as good as it's going to get if you ask me. She was spot on for six great seasons.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked the dialogue, and yeah, I know what you mean about Lana. It's not one of my favorites either, though seeing Martha Kent possessed by a high school girl was one of the funniest Smallville moments of all time! hahaha. Mxy is up! I love this guy!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #103, Mr. Mxyzptlk

**Author's Note:** Takes place sometime post-season 10 when Clark is Superman. That's pretty much it I think. Oh, and mentions '_Jinx_'.

**

* * *

**

Clark eyed Lois talking to that reporter from the Gotham Gazette.

He had shown up earlier that day, and had been flirting with Lois ever since. Now, normally Clark wasn't the jealous type, but this guy was rubbing him the wrong way. Every time he would glance up to look at Lois with him, Clark could swear that the guy was staring at him.

"Jimmy. What do you know about that guy over there?"

The photographer looked up, "Huh? Oh, John Trixx? I don't know man. He says he's from the Gazette, but I've never heard of him."

Clark frowned. Something wasn't right about this guy. He stood up and walked off the main floor and into the office he shared with Lois. As soon as he shut the door, he heard a _**POP**_ behind him. Clark turned to see a little little man floating in the air.

"Geeze! I thought I'd never get you alone!" the little man shouted.

He was wearing an organ and purple costume of sorts with a little purple hat. His white hair stuck out on each side wildly.

Clark stared at him, "Who are you?"

"Well, your hot-headed wife out there knows me as John Trixx. But you can call me, Mxy. Short for Mr. Mxyzptlk."

"Mxyzptlk?"

Mxy rolled his eyes, "Don't wear it out, Superman!"

Clark's eyes shot open wide. "How do you know that?"

"I'm an imp from the fifth dimension! I know everything! And you sir, are the ultimate challenge! We're going to have many merry games, you and I!"

"Wait a minute. Mxyzptlk. I know that name. I met someone with that name. He was from the Balkans."

Mxy waved his hands, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I knew some folks out there, gave them a little gift for playing one of my games, what about it?"

Clark frowned, "You gave them a power that used irresponsibly can be very dangerous."

"Oh please, give me a break! That was ages ago!"

This didn't seem to make Clark anymore pleased with the situation. "What do you want from me?"

"I want to play a game."

"What's the game?"

Mxy let out a dramatic laugh, "How nice of you to ask! The game is simple. I'm going to cause havoc until you make me say my name backwards."

"And then what?"

"And then until our dimensions come into alignment again in about three months."

Clark sighed, "I don't think I want to play this game..."

"Too late! Off to cause havoc! Hey, Superman? You ever been to a petting zoo?"

With a loud laugh, Mxy disappeared into thin air. Clark rushed out the door to try and find him. He ran down the hall until he ran into Lois.

"Lois!"

She looked at him with a frown, "What the hell, Smallville? Run me over much?"

"Lois! That guy? John Trixx? He isn't what you think he is."

"What are you talking about?"

Clark shook his head wildly, "Trixx! He's not a good guy. You need to stay away from him."

Lois pulled her head back and gave him an exasperated look.

"I think you're just jealous. And besides, it's not like there's anything going on. He just wants help with a story."

Clark rolled his eyes dramatically, "I'm not jealous! And he doesn't want help with a story, he's an imp!"

"What the hell is an imp?"

"I don't know, but he's from the fifth dimension."

Lois' eyebrows shot into her bangs, "The what? Ok, what did you take this time?"

Clark stared at her wildly, "What?"

"Was it that silver kryptonite stuff again? I know how paranoid that makes you."

He groaned, "I'm not on anything! I'm telling you, he's a little man with a big purple hat. He's not that guy you see! I have to make him say or spell his name backwards, it's the only way that I can send him back to the fifth dimension!"

She rolled her eyes and started to walk away from him, assuming he had lost his mind again, and started to enter their office.

"Lois!"

He chased after her, bumping into Jimmy along the way, "Hey, CK."

"Hey Jimmy, what's up?"

"Uh...you busy?"

Clark looked at the closing door to their office, "Kind of, Buddy. What's wrong?"

Jimmy looked around nervously, "If you're busy, it's cool."

"Huh? No, what's wrong? What is it?"

Jimmy looked around again, "There's uh...there's a bunch farm animals in the copy room? And I kind of figured...I mean...you know how much crazy stuff seems to happen around you and Lois...and uh...I just thought...maybe you'd have an idea of...you know...why?"

Clark grinned widely, "Come with me."

He grabbed Jimmy's arm and dragged him into his and Lois' office. "Tell Lois what you just said."

"Uh...there are-"

_**POP**_

The three looked over to see Mr. Mxyzptlk floating mid-air, Lois felt her jaw drop. "Holy crap. It's an imp."

"I told you!" shouted Clark.

Mxy put his hands together like a mad scientist. "I'm not done with you!" he wagged a finger at Clark. "Wait, who are you?" he pointed a finger at Jimmy, who gulped. "Never mind. You're that idiot photographer! The one that's always running after Mrs. Hot Head over here."

"That's my wife you're talking about," growled Clark.

Mxy blew a raspberry and waved at Clark, "She's not my type anyways!"

Lois felt her jaw drop. Again.

"And what the hell is that supposed to mean? You're the idiot that gave us a name that can't even be pronounced backwards!"

"Yes it can! It's pronounced _Kltpzyxm_! Gosh! Is it wonder why you're not my type? Now, like I was saying-"

Mxy's arms disappeared. Then his legs.

"Wait, what? You...ah, nuts!"

With a faint _**pop**_, the rest of Mr. Mxyzptlk disappeared into thin air. Lois turned to Clark with a satisfied smirk.

"I love you," he said dreamily.

Lois held up a hand, "Smallville, I just got told by a Great Gazoo look-a-like that I wasn't his type. Not nearly in the mood."

She walked away to leave Jimmy and Clark standing side-by-side with surprised looks on their faces.

"Tough luck, CK."

Clark had stared to nod and was about to say something when they heard click-clacking of heels coming their way. Clark had barely turned his head when Lois tackled him to the ground. Looking down at him, she smirked and shrugged, "I changed my mind."

Jimmy coughed awkwardly as he walked towards the door, "Uh...I'll uh...see you guys...uh...later...but you know...clothed."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? hahaha. I can't get Gilbert Godfry's voice out of my head now, so I hope you guys liked it, hahaha.

One of my favorite characters have always been Mr. Mxyzptlk because he can be part of the story without actually being a villain. He's like a comedic relief character when done right. I've always thought it'd be a great opening to a Superman movie to have Mxy putting cats in trees or something and Clark having to make him say his name backwards, which is always hilarious. If you haven't seen the animated Superman show, watch it! hahaha.

Also, in a future chapter, we're going to have Lex and Clark meet post-Season 10. I'm going to let you guys vote: Will Lex remember who Clark is when he is Superman? Let me know in your reviews and majority will rule! Can't wait to hear what you guys think!

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _the Kent House._


	104. Kent House

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - Well, that was nice of you to say, haha. I liked the Smallville version, but I need my Imp! hahaha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, I think that's a pretty fair assessment of the Lois Lane hormones. Clark Kent? Engage! Engage! hahaha.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that it worked for you! haha. I've always liked Mxy as more of a nuisance than as a villain that deep down, Clark doesn't mind nearly as much as he liked to pretend, haha. The Animated Series version of Mxy is easily my favorite! Even if Gilbert Godfrey kills me sometimes, haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - KILL-PIX-YEEZ-SUM. haha. That's how he says it in the animated series, haha. Though I think that while he was flirting with Lois as John Trixx, he was talking in more of a Brad Pitt type of voice haha. He was trying to seduce Lois to annoy Clark, haha. I kind of stole that from the animated series episode where Clark is like, "I don't even know how to say your names forwards, let alone backwards." and Mxy goes, "You don't have to say it, I have to!" and so Clark says, "Say what?" and there Mxy goes, saying it himself, hahaha. I loved that scene.

Originally, I didn't have Jimmy appear, but then I thought, "This is the perfect time to bring him back!" haha. I'm glad you liked him!

_**cathy03**_ - I based it off that episode because that's easily the best version of Mxy I have seen to date. I wanted to use the farm animals bit as a callback to that episode, so I'm glad that you noticed it! Also, I totally stole how Lois tricks him from the scene I described to _LoisNClark4Ever_ above!

_**sasslady**_ - KILL-PIX-YEEZ-SUM. haha. At least that's how they did it on the animated series! hahaha. Someone has to have noticed how many weird things seem to happen around Lois and Clark, haha. I have a bit involving Perry White that revolves around that idea coming up, haha.

**_Katlynne_** - Haha, it was the Jo'an Puppy Dog Eyes that did me in! I really enjoy Lois and Clark as friends. Their banter is pure gold. And of course, as a big call-back and reference and foreshadowing kind of guy, I loved all her lines about being across the desk from the most bumbling reporter on the masthead or when possibly my biggest squeal ever came when Lois told Martha to give her a nerd with glasses any day in Crusade! hahahaha. I loved that!

Awww, your poor roommate, hahaha. I'm not sure how Lex is going to come back either. And I don't know which Lex it's going to be since we're talking about Darkseid talking to Earth-2 Lionel (it has to be about Lex, right?), and maybe Lionel asks for Earth-2 Lex to be resurrected? Which would still bring the issue of "how would he not recognize Clark as Superman?" but then again, "How will anyone not recognize Clark as Superman after he's been flaunting his face around the greater Kansas area for the last ten years?" hahaha. Not that I'm complaining!

I know exactly what you mean. I am dying to see Clark don the suit and take flight (hopefully with Lois naming him Superman!) but how can I possibly say goodbye to a show that I really love? It's like an old friend is leaving. BUT THERE IS GOOD NEWS! The new Justice League movie will not be connected to the Zack Snyder film. **LET THERE BE TOM WELLING AND ERICA DURANCE IN THE JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA FILM! **haha. I can dream, can't I? hahaha. After all, I don't see how a _young _Superman could have all these superhero friends so quickly...HOPE RENEWED! Hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I thought it suited her, hahaha. And I love writing those little moments between Lois and Clark where they get to actually express how much they care about each other in a sweet or funny way, haha. All too often, those moments are portrayed as this super intense, candle lit, never-going-to-happy-in-the-real-world-ever type moments with fireworks going off in the background, haha. I like those tiny moments, haha. But that's me.

I have seen a lot of the fan manips or fan designs, and more than ever, I think how the suit looks make all the difference in the world! And seeing the first picture of it? That's going to tell us what approach they are taking. I mean, when I saw the Brandon Routh suit for the first time, I thought, "Same old same with a bit of an updated, more modern spin." But I've seen ones that are all regal or super alien or futuristic, and to me it says, "This is not the guy that we know, not that we won't like him this way, but it's not going to be what we've come to know and love."

I'm not against something new, but I think that how the suit looks will tell me whether to expect classic Superman or something entirely new. And if the suit is new, there is a really good chance the characters will be new. And that just puts everything in the unknown.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Clana, mentions of Tollie, mentions of Chimmy, hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #104, the Kent House

**Author's Note:** I know that I'm pushing it with this one, haha. But I've already done 'the Kitchen', 'the Living Room', and 'the Kent Farm' so far, and I just couldn't _not_ write this! haha. Not after I randomly watched 'Arctic' the other day, the idea has been stuck in my head ever since! Enjoy!

**

* * *

**Lois checked her review mirror for the good ole Smallville Police Department, worried they might have caught onto her race to the Kent Farm.

Her fingers lightened against the leather of her steering wheel. "Just a little bit further," she muttered.

She had to get there. As fast as possible. Chloe had called and told her that she was worried about Clark. That Lana had disappeared, apparently having made a full recovery. It was the last part that Lois couldn't wrap her head around, "_but she left Clark a DVD,_" Chloe said.

At first, Lois had thought that maybe she had been kidnapped again. '_But wouldn't Lana have put up some sort of struggle? Why would she walk out of the hospital with only some DVD left behind? Why would she do that...unless..._'

Her foot pressed the pedal a little harder as she saw a familiar red mailbox flicker into view.

"Almost there..."

The back end of her car fishtailed a bit as she whipped into the Kent driveway. It was dark, so she could see the blue light shining against the window of the Kent living room. '_Clark must be watching it already...oh god...please don't let it be what I think it might be..._' she begged.

She slowly opened the door, doing her best to creep inside without disturbing Clark.

"Please...don't come after me," asked Lana.

Lois could see Clark's breathing become ragged as Lana told him that she loved him via DVD. Lois could feel rage building within herself. '_If Lana really felt that way, she would be here right now. She wouldn't be hurting Clark like this. She wouldn't leave Clark like this._'

The screen turned to static. Clark slowly turned to Lois. She could tell that he was trying to be strong. Like he always did for her.

It broke her heart to see him like this. She had seen him hurt before. She had seen him cry before. But this was different. This was like his whole world was crumbling around him. She wanted to do something. Anything. This was _Clark Kent_. This was her _Smallville_. This was the man that was there for her, every step of the way. Every time she got her heart broken, he was there. Every time she was in trouble, he was there.

He was like her _superman_ in that way.

When his head dipped, breaking her gaze, she felt her legs move. She was racing across the living room, heels be damned. Lois threw her arms around him and squeezed him as tight as she could. His arms edged up her back so that he could cling just as tightly to her.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

He didn't reply. Not at first anyways. He just burrowed his face into her shoulder. "Lois...she's _gone_..."

The pain in his voice broke her heart even more, "I know...I know..."

"I don't...what am I..."

"We'll get through this, Smallville. I promise you."

Clark pulled back to look into her eyes, silently asking her if she really meant it.

Lois smiled a sad smile, tears falling that she didn't particularly care about at this moment in time. "I promise."

"But what if-"

"No. We _will_. Lois and Clark. Taking on the world," she smiled. "You helped me get over Oliver. I'm going to help you now."

Clark smiled sweetly and wiped away a tear, "It's not everyday that Lois Lane wants to help me."

She laughed, "It's not everyday that I get to be the one that saves Clark Kent."

They shared a look for a long while. Lois Lane, the leading activist in the battle against uncomfortable silences, couldn't have been more comfortable. She felt something in the pit of her stomach that she hadn't felt in a while. A pang of want that she had squashed in a shallow grave.

'_Well...Chloe is with Jimmy now..._' she pondered.

Clark looked away shyly and Lois seriously considered going in for the kill. She had already begun to move her face forward when-

"I only get to do the saving so often because you're such a handful," he teased.

Lois rolled her eyes and let out a laugh, '_I was this close to kissing him and then he goes there? Now I've gotta kill him._'

"Please, you're the bumbling farmboy from Hicktown. I, on the other hand, am Lois Lane, star reporter for the Daily Planet. It's only because I'm constantly diving in head first to any situation so that I can get the scoop of the century," she defended.

Clark smiled softly, "You know what, Lois? I'll make you a deal..." Lois frowned at his mysterious tone, but found herself sucking in a breath of anticipation all the same. "...someday, I'm going to give you that scoop of the century you're looking for."

She let out a laugh, "Oh, yeah? And what's that? How corn grows?"

Clark smirked, "My life story, of course."

Lois let out a laugh. "This is good, Smallville. Real good. I see your sense of humor is still hanging in there. '_I spent the night with Farmboy_'? Yeah, that's going to be a real page turner right there," she teased. Clark smiled a knowing smile that gave her shivers. "I didn't mean...that we were going to...you know...spend the night together. Just...like I...I interviewed you...some night..."

Clark couldn't contain a laugh any longer, "It's ok, Lois."

She blushed crimson and exhaled that breath she'd sucked in during her rant.

"I'll tell you what, never mention that again, and I'll go to the store and get us some rocky-road and a few movies. I take it you're going to want boring Vanilla?" She held up a hand before Clark could answer her, "Never mind. I think it's about time you upgrade to Wild Cherry."

And like that, she was gone. Clark smiled. Lois was always there for him when he needed her. He loved that about her. He grabbed his jacket off the top of the couch and made his way to the backdoor, deciding to spend a little time in the loft before she got back.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, that was a better ending to that scene, don't you think? haha. I know that Clark is all broody and ignoring Jimmy the next time we see him in the loft, but I'm going to say that he was just so caught up in his thoughts that he barely heard Jimmy. And still, even though he's having a bit of an upswing at the end of the chapter, that doesn't mean he isn't still depressed. Besides, his medicine (Lois Lane) was gone, haha.

I always wondered what happened after the hug and where Lois disappeared to. I mean, why would she leave him to brood in the loft like that? I've got to imagine something like this would have happened. I hope that you liked the call-backs to 'Wild Cherry' line, the 'An Interview with Superman' headline, and of course my own delusional belief that Lois didn't jump Clark's bones because she didn't want to hurt her cousin, haha.

Anyways, I hope that you liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Homecoming._


	105. Homecoming

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, but then again, I have to admit that waiting/hoping/begging for them to get together kept me glued to my seat, hahaha. It was a big "_I **have** to watch it live in case they finally do something!_" kind of of thing, hahaha. At least it was for me. And now it's a "_I **have** to watch it live in case they make some sort of Superman hint or do something to bridge the gap, WERE THOSE GLASSES?_" kind of thing, hahaha. So, I understand why they kept the suspense in.

I was actually one of the (seemingly) few that really enjoyed Superman Returns. Like I've said countless times now, I really like the references and the call-backs and all that jazz, so I really liked the nostalgia feel that came with Superman Returns. It just needed more action. And please god, a kryptonite-less storyline, hahaha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I felt really bad until Lois walked in the door. I started to creep off the couch, not quite standing, but off the couch, haha. And then they shared that look and it was a whispered, "yes...yes...yes..." and then she ran towards him and I was jumping up and down, "YES! YES! YES!" Haha. "Clois is back, baby!"

I'm glad that you liked it! I thought the best way to expand upon it would be to show before and after, so I kind of went for it, haha. And gee, no pressure, huh? hahaha.

_**sasslady**_ - We'll get to see the '_I Spent The Night With Superman_' chapter coming up very soon, haha, so it's a bit of a hint on my part, haha. As much as I was glad that she finally said goodbye, I was kind of disappointed that Clark didn't get a chance to do the same. Both times now (Arctic and Requiem), he had little say in the matter. But I guess that brings us back to my very first chapter, haha, where I wanted to give him a chance to say goodbye and pick Lois! And btw, this one is a little long, haha.

**_A,sky_** - Thanks! I couldn't help myself when I had her say that line about always going for the big scoop! haha.

**_Katlynne_** - Me too! I think that's a big reason why I feel so head over heels for Erica Durance's version of Lois Lane. She was truly awesome and she brought out the best version of Clark Kent I have seen from Tom Welling. He's not a great actor, but across from Erica, they make one hell of a Lois and Clark, haha. That was another one of my favorite little hints. I was so giddy! hahaha. And yeah, at least in the comics and the movies, he had never shown his face before, haha. They all know his non-Clark Kent look and it's going to be a tough sell that the people of Metropolis don't recognize him. Not that I won't give them a _ton _of rope to work with here, hahaha.

. . . . . .so how do you feel about Zack Snyder? hahahaha. I hear you loud and clear. I'm not particularly excited about what I've heard from him, and all his talk about having not seen a manly Superman in a while makes me wonder what exactly he thinks is manly. Is Superman going to run around with a beard and punch bank robbers through walls or something? Superman is kind of supposed to be a gentleman, so I'm not really sure where he is going with this. And I hadn't heard about his comments against Erica Durance, but if he's really trying to talk bad about her, that might as well be the noose around his neck. She. Is. The. Perfect. Lois. Lane. I like Amy Adams just fine, and I liked Teri Hatcher and Margot Kidder before Erica took the role, but I think there is little doubt that Erica has been everything the fans could dream of, and so much more.

Also stepping off the soapbox, hahaha. I feel like we just had our own little segment of "_Really?_" with Seth Myers and Amy Poehler just then, hahaha.

I'm glad that you liked the chapter! It's so hard to take those perfect Clois moments on the show and turn them into chapters because you really have to add something new so that it doesn't seem like you just copied them down for the hell of it. I'm glad that I could add something, haha. I honestly gave up trying to sort it through my head, as well as trying to sort through the timeline between Season 7 and Season 8. I mean, for starters, if Lex is in that bad of shape, how could (human) Clark have walked away without a scratch? My only guess is that Jor-El saved him because even though he just took away Clark's powers, he is still his son. And how exactly does Lex crawl out of a gigantic hole in the ground in his condition and survive long enough to get somewhere where he could get help? Uh...I'm coming up blank with this one, haha. I mean, the only reasonable explanation is that Jor-El saved him too, but why is he so badly injured then? It's just all messed up! hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, they don't always do the best job of explaining stuff as you can see at the end of my reply to Katlynne. It's just insanity!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Clana, mentions of Lollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #105, Homecoming

**Author's Note: **Takes place during Season 10's 'Homecoming', I hope that it's up to expectations.

* * *

"Tights?"

Clark blushed slightly, "No! Not...tights...exactly."

"They kind of sound like tights, Clark."

"Anways!" interrupted Clark. "Now that I know what the future holds in store for us, I'm going to invite Lois over tonight. Maybe get a second chance at the dance that I missed at Homecoming. I think I still have some of Chloe's party supplies in the loft from her birthday party a few years back."

"So, what? Dance in the barn, little music, some champagne? I can dig that."

Clark nodded, "I'm going to tell her that I love her."

Oliver quirked a smile. "Well, that's hardly a news flash. What music are you going to play?"

"I was thinking about finding something that Whitesnake sings. It's her favorite band."

Oliver let out a laugh, "Nah, I don't think so." He grabbed his iPod off the desk, "Try..." he scrolled down his playlist, "...Kim Taylor."

"But Whitesnake is her favorite band..." Clark questioned.

"Yeah, but sometimes you go with something new, something not so obvious." Clark frowned. Oliver smirked. "Given the situation, I think going for the not-so-obvious might be a little fitting for you." Clark frowned more. "Lana was the obvious choice, but Lois was the right choice?"

Clark rolled his eyes, "I get the point."

"I mean seriously, were you blind?" joked Oliver

Walking out of Oliver's office, Clark made sure to bump him with his shoulder.

"What? It was a joke! It's not like I wrote a whole FanFiction story bashing the chick!"

Clark turned back and mouthed, "_FanFiction?_"

Oliver paled, "What? It's not a nerdy as it sounds." Clark left the office without another word, shaking his head. "It's not," muttered Oliver.

Later on at the Barn, Clark began to set things up for his big night with Lois. He had found Chloe's old disco ball and a spotlight to shine on it. He knew that Lois would give him a hard time about it, but at the same time, cheesy seemed just right for them right now.

Whether she liked to admit it or not, Lois Lane liked her share of cheesy. And Clark knew that. She liked those cliche moments. She liked those tear jerker movies that she liked to force him to watch but threatened him if he even considered telling anyone about it. There was something so unrelentingly sweet about them. She loved those moments because whether you're wanting to or not, they force that grin onto your face.

And whether Clark knew it or not, she liked that because it reminded her of him.

Her Smallville.

The guy that no matter what, managed to put a smile on her face. Warming her straight to her core. And he would always do that, just because there was nothing he loved more than seeing that smile. It was probably his worst kept secret.

Hearing a car pull into the driveway, Clark turned off the lights and hid behind the stairs of the loft as Lois entered the barn.

"Clark?"

With a flick, the spotlight turned on and light shined all throughout the barn while the music began to play. The smile on her face let him know that he did the right thing by going with the disco ball. He stepped out of the shadows, and he could see a nervousness take over her.

"Not that I'm an interior designer, but one of these things doesn't exactly go with the other."

Clark smirked in the darkness. '_I knew she'd give me a hard time about it._'

"I'm sorry we missed our dance," he told her.

She shook her head, "You don't need to worry about me, Clark. If anybody understands deadlines and urgent..." she hesitated, "..._things_...it's me."

Deep down, Lois was still absolutely frazzled by the whole idea that Clark was the Blur and his destiny being so great. Ever since she found out, she had been replaying her conversation with Ollie about how she couldn't share him with the world. That she couldn't take being second fiddle.

But watching him walk towards her, watching the life dance in his eyes, she felt like _this_ was different. This was _him_. This was Clark. This was _Smallville_.

"I'm not worried about you. I've missed you."

She couldn't help but feel surprised, "Oh."

And then she felt that feeling in her gut. That feeling that told her that he wasn't lying. And that feeling that even if he couldn't tell her all the little things about his life outside the Daily Planet. His life outside Smallville. That he would never put her second to the world.

"Well...I don't know...neither of us our primed for Dancing with the Stars, and speaking strictly as friends, I don't know if this is such a good idea."

She tells him this, but finds herself several steps closer to him. '_Now when the hell did that happen?_'

"Lois. Get over here."

She almost doesn't trust herself to. Like if she does, this is all going to be over. If she goes over there, she's never leaving.

"I'm not sure how we're going to make this work without the jukebox nostalgia and the balloons and-"

"Lois."

She looked into his eyes, and she knows that they will make it work. And not just this dance. "Shut up?"

He nods with that smirk that she swears she taught him.

"Right," she tells him. Normally, she'd have to kill him for telling her to shut up. But right now, well, there was an awful good chance she might just kiss that little smirk right off his face. Arms wrapped around his neck, they barely made it a step before he was crushing her feet. "Ow!"

He looked down shyly, '_This was not the way this was supposed to go..._' he internally groaned. "Sorry?"

"Hey, I'm the one that put my feet under yours-"

"But I-

"No. It's fine."

But he wasn't talking no, or fine, or anything else for an answer tonight. He wanted to show her something tonight. Show her everything she meant to him and damn it...they were going to dance. He grabbed her waist and pulled her close, "Let's just try this."

Lois set her feet on top of his, and they shared an intense gaze as they swayed back and forth to the music. Clark's smile faded, and was replaced with a serious look. But the emotion in his eyes told her that this wasn't going to be a bad kind of serious.

"I love you."

A smile erupted across her face. "I love you too," she nearly stammered.

Clark smiled that Kent Grin that always made her weak in the knees and then he saw something that you don't see very often.

Lois Lane looked away shyly from Clark Kent.

The two pulled each other close into a tight embrace. And in that moment, they both knew that this was the new normal. That after this, things would be forever changed. And for two people that constantly avoided it, they couldn't have been happier about it.

"Clark, there's something we need to talk about."

He let out a sigh, "Just for now...can we leave tomorrow...to tomorrow, and just have this?"

Content to let the moment wash over them and enjoy their reconnection in the Kent Barn that had been the stage for so many of their important moments in their relationship, Lois nodded and they simply closed their eyes and swayed to the music.

Clark let himself fade the rest of the world out, entranced by the sound of Lois's heart beating in rhythm with his own. Years later, his cousin Kara would use this moment as her trump card. She would tell the story time and time again. Because as he lost himself in the soft beat of Lois Lane's heart, he took flight for the very first time. You see, Kara had told him to take one sound and make it his whole world.

And as he peeked out to see himself several feet off the ground, he smiled. Lois Lane was, is, and always will be his whole world.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did it live up to expectations? haha. I think that we were all completely satisfied with the original scene, because it was just about as perfect as it gets for a Lois and Clark moment. It was so perfect, that I actually found the proposal to actually be lacking in the awesomeness department, but I know it's just because we were spoiled by this scene! haha. It was just absolutely perfect! Every little detail.

Anyways, I had to try and add a little something to _the_ Clois moment of the show. Hopefully I pulled it off. The only thing that I could think was to go with the Clark-so-in-love perspective and the Lois-trying-not-to-overstep/trying-not-to-get-hurt perspective and how it all culminated with Clark flying. Hopefully my explanation of why he was finally able to fly wasn't too cheesy, haha. I kind of thought of it at the last minute, and I liked how it fit in, so I kept it!

And one last note, I hope that I haven't made anyone feel slighted by not responding to your Lex Luthor comments. I'm just trying leave it all up to you guys and didn't want to say anything that might sway the vote one way or the other. Last time we did a poll, I kind of got the feeling that maybe my comments caused some votes to go one way because they thought that's what I wanted. I'm totally on the fence about this, so it's all up to you guys!

Soooooo, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

And btw, I say we burn KryptonSite to the ground! I was absolutely giddy about the prospect of a _Smallville High_ spin-off show and I was literally cursing Gough and Millar for their talk about Lana being Clark's _true_ soulmate. And oh god, I was like "WHAT? LANA IS COMING BACK?" And then as I clicked through to read anyone of those posts, I would come to realize that today is April 1st, better known as April Fools Day! I admit it. They got me, hahaha.

**Next Up:** _Gem Stone Kryptonite._


	106. Gem

**Review Comments:**

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Here, here! haha. I'm glad that you like that perspective, because this one is all about that, haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it. After I read it, I was like, "I hope no one thinks I'm bashing FanFiction...I mean...I'm writing...FanFiction...as we speak..." haha. I'm glad that I managed to pull it off! haha. it's a tough one to add to!

**_brodieresa_** - Let's put another shrimp on the barbie! What? That's _not_ what they say there? haha, just kidding. I can't believe they are making you guys wait so long! I would have lost my mind by now! And oh man, I hope I haven't spoiled anything for you for Season 9 and 10! haha. I always worry about stuff like that since not everyone has seen every episode multiple times like nerds like me, hahaha.

I'm really hoping to see more Clark Kent too. It's a real debate amongst the comic book fans: Who is he really? Superman? or Clark Kent? I have always been in the '_Clark Kent is the man and Superman is the mask_' party. Who he is as Clark Kent is what defines who he is as Superman, and what makes him the World's Greatest Hero is the values that he learned from the Kents. Though, the powers don't hurt, haha.

Hadn't thought about a Clois grandparents chapter, but now that you mention it, I'll see what I can do!

_**Bella Swan is Max Ride's Bitch**_ - First off, love the name, hahahaha. Not that I'm bashing Twilight (only saw the first movie on a date and never read a page, so don't hurt me Twilight...ers? haha) Secondly, yeah, KryptonSite really got me! hahaha. I didn't even realize that it was April 1st. And don't feel bad about not reviewing, because look, you're reviewing now! haha. That's what counts in my book!

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it! And the FanFiction line! haha. It's not meant with offense because...well...I'm a FanFiction writer! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm losing faith more and more everyday on that movie, haha. I'm starting to expect a Lumberjack Superman with basically a Watchmen-esque storyline where he's all killing people and stuff, haha. Lois Lane will probably sleep around, probably with Lex Luthor to get a story because she's so "smart", while Perry White is an alcoholic or something. I just don't like what I've heard so far, haha.

It had to come up when he visited him mid-interview, right? haha. And yeah, Oliver is a total closet nerd, hahaha. I think it's my favorite Clois moment, and while I liked the Proposal moment, I think that moment has to be _the_ moment since a proposal was a foregone conclusion, haha.

I hadn't made it to the 'Friday' part, hahaha. But I think i would have noticed by then...I hope, hahaha. I think it might be the wedding bit? Not sure, but I read somewhere else, I wanna say Smallville Wikia, that they will have the wedding in the first part of the finale?

**_Mpj891_** - Awww, I'm glad that you've liked them! And yeah, little Clois was a great chapter, haha. They are adorable kids!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Whew! haha. *wipes sweat away from brow*, haha. I thought they could have done a better job with the speech, but all in all, it would have been very hard to top the Homecoming scene! haha. And yeah, even with a big speech, was she going to say anything else? hahaha. After everything they have been through, Lois Lane isn't ever going anywhere (at least she better not, Zack Snyder!).

I'm writing a chapter about Lex, so I thought I'd give you guys the rights to decide whether or not Lex knows Clark's secret when he returns from the dead before the finale. Michael Rosenbaum keeps saying he's had scenes with Tom Welling, so I think he might remember, but I'm not sure.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad that I could make things a little smoother! haha. Things get a little choppy in the Smallville world sometimes. I don't know if that's a lack of effort on the writer's part, or maybe they feel like they painted themselves into a corner so they cop-out a bit, but I've had more than a few moments of pure "huh?" How did J'onn and Clark get back if J'onn lost his powers in Odyssey? How did Clark get the Fortress back if the crystal was reprogrammed to send people to the Phantom Zone? How did Lex's clone know about Clois when his last memory should have been Clana? CONFUSION!

I think they tip-toe around the Clana stuff because there are still a lot of Clana-thumpers out there. Which, I guess I can understand if your first exposure to Superman was Smallville. But as a (dare I say?) veteran of the Superman world, I was waiting for Lois Lane from the get-go. I thought she would show up as a transfer student by the end of the Pilot, but nope, I had to wait three long years for "Who are you?" "Lois. Lois Lane." hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #106, Gem Stone Kryptonite

**Author's Note:** Takes place during Season 9's '_Persuasion_', there will be a sequel, have no fear, hahaha.

* * *

'_Is that...Pie? Who's making pie? Who do I know that can make a pie? Did Mom come to visit?_'

Clark walked through the kitchen and peered around to see Lois standing the kitchen.

'_Oh god, it's Lois. Where's the fire extinguisher? And what is she wearing? ...Damn._'

Turning around to see him, Lois exclaimed, "Hey Sweetie Pie!"

He frowned, 'Sweetie Pie?'

"Welcome home!"

"Lois...what's going on?" he asked. His confusion was etched across his face.

She placed the pie down on the counter and removed her oven mitts, "I moved in."

Yet again. Confusion. Replaced with the curiosity of whether or not she would wear that get-up to bed.

"But don't worry, I'm camped out in the guest room until..."

Clark almost snorted. '_Because **that's** what I was worried about..._'

She grinned wider as she continued, "...we get engaged."

It was like the Jaws music was playing in his head. He couldn't quite explain it.

"Engaged?"

She nodded happily, "Uh huh."

Turning back to the kitchen, she picked up a pan with what appeared to be a pot-roast inside of it. Then she made her way to the stove.

Clark watched her from afar, his wheels spinning away. '_Why is she acting like this? Did I forget something?_'

He started to count the big dates on his fingers.

'_Birthday? No. Anniversary of when we met? No. Anniversary of when we started dating? No. It can't be Valentines Day, she said she...wait a minute...she said she didn't want to make a big deal because she wanted me to make a big deal about it! Dammit! She can't she just yell!_'

"You know, Lois. You don't have to make me dinner..."

She turned with a smile, "But I want to!"

Clark smiled nervously at her, '_So I guess today is the day she finds out my secret...otherwise I let the house is going to burn down..._'

At dinner, Clark watched her saw through the burnt pot-roast, a grimace evident on his face.

"Move over Betty Crocker, I've got this cooking thing down."

He watched as it literally smoked on the platter.

"How's your pot-roast?" she asked.

He nervously looked down at, well, whatever it was occupying his plate. He slowly slid the plate down so he could brush it off. "Oh, it's delicious."

Clark could hear the cry from Shelby, even he didn't want the...whatever it was.

"Wonderful," she cooed.

He almost felt guilty, but even he couldn't chew it down. "It was _really_ sweet of you to do all this..."

"Well...I am just so proud of you for bringing home the bacon the least I can do is cook it up in a pan," she told him.

Clark gave her a nervous smile. '_She actually sounds serious. She must be really mad at me..._'

"And...well...never let you forget that _your_ the man," she said while pouring his beer.

He started to panic, '_Ding, ding, ding. She looks she wants to kiss you, but she wants to kill you. I repeat. She wants to kill you._'

"Lois...did something happen?" Which was of course code for, '_Did I do something wrong?_' She looked at him confused. "You just seem so cheerful."

"Well, you said you wanted a traditional relationship, and you..." she dropped green beans onto his plate with a thud, "...were very persuasive."

Clark had a moment of realization. '_So this is what she's upset about. Because she thinks that I think I want her to be a housewife..._'

"What if I miss the old Lois?"

He wanted to pat himself on the back for that one. '_That would do the trick._' But Lois just shrugged.

"It's too late...I...quit my job at the Planet."

'_Yeah, that's what I...wait...what?_'

"You did what?"

She looked all too gleeful. "Yeah! Now, instead of being chained to a desk all day?" She went to sit in his lap. "_I_ get to be _your_ ball and chain."

Lois held his face in her hands and pressed her nose into his. He laughed nervously. "Lois, you can't quit reporting. That job is your life."

"Well now my life is with you."

If the alarms weren't already going off in his head, that certainly did it. It was like he could hear the Jaws music all over again.

"For better...for worse. For richer or for poorer"

He felt like fainting, "Lois...what're you talking about?"

And for a second, he thought she was going to come out of her current insanity. But instead, she hopped up with glee. With _glee_...

"You're absolutely right. What kind of adjective is poorer? Somebody is going to need an editor..." she turned around and looked at him with this so-not-Lois Lane look of vulnerability that made Clark shiver, "...for their vows," she whispered.

Gulp.

"Right. You know, Lois, there's something at the uh...office that I need to..._investigate_."

As quickly as he could, he left Lois behind talking about "cold feet" and "the big event". Something was wrong. Very, very, very wrong.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? hahaha. And before you can ask, yes, there will be a sequel. That one will be in Lois' perspective. You see, when I came up with the idea for a Gem Stone Kryptonite chapter, it was obviously going to be about Lois and her wild ride. But then I thought, '_what is Clark thinking about this before he figures out that she's actually high on something?_' And I just had to write it, hahaha.

Anyways, I hope you guys like it! Let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Superman._


	107. Superman

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I love that episode! haha. I really liked All-Star Superman, and it is a bit of a different take, but that can be fun too. It doesn't always have to be the same old, same old. It's fun to try something new.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm glad that you liked his POV. Hopefully you'll enjoy the Lois POV as well! hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - I must have missed that bit, haha. I didn't really think about it as I talked about it, I just wanted to have a bit where someone (really, anyone) gave him a hard time about Lana, haha. Yeah, I have to imagine that he was freaking out a little bit, haha. I was totally had! haha. I admit it!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - That's what the music sounded like to me! haha. And well, he had to think something, right? I know that I've had people do stuff like that were they put on a big show, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that you liked 'Homecoming'! And yeah, housewife Lois is really scary! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #106, Superman

**Author's Note:** This one takes place after 'Chief', but the flashback of Jimmy getting hired in 'Jeff' takes place between 'Chief' and this chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

"But I don't wanna."

Lois rolled her eyes and shooed him out of his chair, "Get out of my spot."

"That's my chair, Lois."

She shook her head, "What's yours is mine, Smallville."

"I think you mean what's mine is yours."

"Exactly."

Clark paused, "Wait...no...that's not what I meant-"

"_I Spent The Night With Superman._"

"What?"

Lois turned in the chair, "That's what the title should be."

"But that makes it sound like you slept with him or something," he warned.

"I do sleep with Superman."

Clark frowned, "Yeah, but...you're getting married to me."

"Clark. You are Superman."

He closed his eyes, "But people don't know that."

"Awww, do you think wittle Jimmy won't respect his big, cool CK?"

Clark laughed, "Fine. I am kind of happy that Perry hired Jimmy this morning."

Lois smirked him. Clark was such a sap.

"Ok, your origins are up next, give me that spiel about Krypton real quick."

Clark rolled his eyes, "It's not a spiel, Lois. I _am_ from Krypton."

"Look, you were born on Kyrpton. You're from Smallville, Smallville. You'll always be from Smallville. You'll always be Smallville."

He let out a laugh, "Quit saying Smallville."

She snapped her fingers with a smirk, urging him to go on.

"I am Kal-El from Kyrpton, a planet that existed a few trillion miles away from Earth. It was destroyed when it's unstable core ignited. I am one of only two survivors left of the Kryptonian race, Myself and Kara Zor-El, better known as Supergirl."

Clark looked over her shoulder and chucked, "There isn't a 'C' or an 'I' in Krypton, Lois."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, give me the low down on the powers."

"Lois, you know my powers."

"Yeah, but it'll be easier to write it if you recite it."

He let out a sigh and closed his eyes for his speech, "Fine. I can fly, I'm super-fast, and I'm super-strong. I'm basically invulnerable, and I have heat-vision and super-breath. Oh, and I can see through anything but lead."

"Yeah, you can."

Clark snorted, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Now it was Lois' turn to snort, "Like you aren't _sweeter_ and more _gentlemanly_ on days I wear underwear that you like. Or you know, none at all," she winked.

"Lois, I...I don't...I've never...done...that," he stammered.

"Uh huh."

Clark pulled his tie down a little bit, popping the collar button. "I haven't," he muttered, causing Lois to let out a laugh.

"Uh huh, anyways, what's your motto?"

He puffed out his chest a little bit, which caused Lois to snort, but Clark continued anyways. "I stand for Truth and Justice."

She quirked her lips to the right and frowned, "What about 'Truth, Justice, and the American Way'?"

"I save people all around the world, Lois."

"So?"

"Well, isn't that kind of alienating to the rest of the world?"

Lois frowned, "Did an alien just say he was worried about alienating?"

"Hey."

She rolled her eyes, "I know, I know. You prefer Intergalactic Traveler. I remember. You're so touchy."

"I'm touchy? You're the one that made me sleep on the couch because I asked if you could leave those gross slippers outside the bedroom!"

"They're cute bunny slippers!"

"But they-

"Cute bunny slippers!"

Clark closed his eyes and took a breath, but Lois glared at him. "One more word, and I'm going to kill you."

He kept his mouth shut, so Lois leaned up and gave him a peck on the lips, "Smart boy. Now, let's talk about your tights."

"They aren't tights," he muttered.

She spun around in her chair and fixed an unconvinced smirk on her face, "I've seen your butt in them. They're tights."

"So, you have been checking me out?" he laughed.

"Well, my idiot fiancee told me that my _adorable_ bunny slippers were gross, so I killed him in his sleep with these little green rocks that he's allergic to? You see, they're almost unrealistically abundant in our little small town. Like seriously, how many green rocks can one town have?"

Clark froze in place, "So it's made out of this kind of a spandex material."

Lois smirked, he was such an easy mark. "And who's idea was it to have the underwear...on the outside?"

He blushed crimson. "My Mom made it for me." He saw Lois's face. "She did!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I thought that since I promised a chapter where they are writing the article, I'd take the opportunity to make fun of some of the more silly aspects of the Superman character, haha. I love the guy, but come on, underwear on the outside? hahaha. All that kryptonite? haha. I had to!

Anyways, let me know what you guys thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Not sure._


	108. Dinah

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - Oh, we're going to see Lois's side of the craziness, haha. I would say it's in the similar vein to how I did 'Fortune', where we kind of weave in and out of on-screen stuff with some off-screen stuff? And yeah, I was sad to see there wasn't a Valentines Day episode for Season 10, but I guess they've had a lot of Valentines Day episodes over ten years so I can see why they skipped it.

Now, I can't get too partial here, haha. As a writer, I'm supposed to be impartial, but I will say this: Superman and Lois Lane go hand-in-hand (literally) and I can't see him with anyone else (I'm talking to you Wonder Woman/Superman shippers!). But I have to accept the fact that _this_ Clark Kent, the Smallville Clark Kent, is not Superman. At least not yet. So I get why they brought Lana Lang in to be the love interest (you can't really have a show without some kind of love interest). But why they kept her on once Lois Lane came along, is a bit confusing to me.

All Superheroes seem to have had underwear over their pants at some point or another, haha. It's a union thing. haha. I'm glad that you liked having Clois all to each other. It's always fun to write them that way because they're very funny together because they're usually going at it about something (or just plain going at it, hahaha). I think there is still banter, it's just a different banter. And I'm very excited for when Booster Gold comes to town (great character, btw) because it sounds like Lois is going to be campaigning on behalf of the Blur!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - Thanks! haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**A,sky**_ - The thing with the underwear is that as much as I laugh about it...Tom Welling better have underwear on the outside of his suit come time for the Finale, hahaha. I won't accept anything less. You can mess with Batman and Wonder Woman's costume all you want. They have a new costume every two or three years. Superman has (for the vast majority of his history) had the same iconic suit. Underwear on the outside included, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that it made the top three! haha. And I'm glad to hear you enjoy the other 105 chapters as well, hahaha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Well, kryptonite is her trump card, haha. It's her way of saying, "I mean business, Smallville." haha.

**_cathy03_** - I have always felt like if at least one person within the comic, show, movie, whatever cracks a joke about whatever unrealistic quality there is about the comic, show, movie, whatever, then the audience will actually kind of accept that quality. If someone cracks a joke about the suit, they are far less likely to let the suit keep them from enjoying the movie. The same goes with all the powers, the kryptonite, and his origins. So in my mind, that was kind of what I hope to see in a movie someday, haha. Otherwise, I think people are going to be too busy stressing over that stuff, haha.

And yeah, the people who say that need glasses even more than Clark does, hahaha.

_**Kinnari3**_ - Well, all along I've tried to blend the show with parts of the comics that haven't been covered yet, so it really means a lot that you thought so well of such an obviously iconic part of the Superman mythos. And it means even more that you would have me on the writing staff, haha. I would absolutely love to write for a living, but unfortunately, no job offers yet, haha.

Maybe I'll fax Warner Bros all of your guys' reviews! haha. 862 reviews have to be worth something, right? haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Mentions of Chlollie, hints of Dollie, mentions of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #108, Dinah Lance

**Author's Note: **Takes place directly after the flashback we saw _way back _in '_Oliver_' when Oliver and Chloe broke up.

* * *

"I wanted this to work. I waited for you, Chlo. I searched and searched for you. I couldn't live with myself knowing that you traded your life for mine. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But you can't let the past go and I can't stay in the past with you. I want to move forward with you, but you aren't willing to do that. Not with me," he told her.

Chloe wiped away her tears, "Please."

"I'm sorry. I...I can't do this anymore."

Oliver whipped out the door and headed for the nearest bar. Chloe broke down and into tears. She pulled out her phone to call Lois.

At the bar, Oliver began to drink shot after shot. He really just wanted to forget this night ever happened. He figured he would just stay at Queen Industries tonight and decide what he wanted to do in the morning. But deep down, he knew he had to walk away for at least a while.

"Alright, you sad sack. What do you think you're doing in here getting loaded?"

Oliver turned to see Dinah Lance, ""Doing what I'm best at...Screwing up my life. Just be happy I didn't go jump off the Capstone Bridge."

"What a shame," she muttered.

He gave her a pointed look so she raised her hands in apology.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Oh, well, you know how it works. Chloe called Lois. Hal is off...you know...Lantern-ing...so Lois called me."

He rolled his eyes and groaned, "She didn't think to call Mia?"

"Well gee, Ollie. I'm so flattered by your enthusiasm to see me," she teased.

"Uh...well, you're just going to tell me what an idiot I am."

Dinah shrugged and sat down, "Another man who can't handle the truth, I see."

Oliver looked over to see her trying to hide a smirk. He let out a sigh, "Get on with it."

"Get on with what?"

"Tell me what an idiot I am."

"I don't you're an idiot."

He snorted.

"I don't. I was there. I saw what happened. That can't be easy to deal with."

Oliver took a long drink.

"I know that Chloe loves me. But there's that feeling you have with somebody, when it's real? And we just don't have it."

She frowned, "What kind of feeling?"

"Take Lois and Clark..." Dinah rolled her eyes but nodded. "...no matter what, when the world is on the brink, those two can stand back to back and take it all on together because there isn't anyone else they would rather have standing there with them."

"And your point?"

He took a long swig of his beer. "When the world is on the brink, I'm not the person that Chloe is going to want standing there with her."

"You know what I think the problem is?"

Oliver looked over, thinking she was going to have some little gem of wisdom in her pocket. "Let me guess...I forgot to put the lid down again?"

She stifled a laugh, "I think maybe, _just maybe_, she just hates that ridiculous goatee you've been wearing," she quipped.

Oliver looked up, mouth agape. He had started to wear a fake goatee when in costume to help make himself look different since he announced to the world that he was going to quit being the Green Arrow. It was part of his cover, but he was still touchy about it. "How dare you!" he laughed.

Dinah laughed.

He turned fully to her and said, "I just want what Lois and Clark have. You know why they work?"

She rolled her eyes. "If you say that stupid kill-or-kiss thing, I'm going to slap you. I feel like I've heard about it 108 times now."

Oliver held his stance for a moment, '_What an odd number to pick..._' he pondered, and then turned back to the bar and took a drink.

Dinah smirked and nodded her head. "Smart choice."

"What about you? What's going on with you and the Tin-Man?"

"Me and Victor are...we're not so much seeing each other anymore," she told him, taking a shot in the process.

Oliver let his eyebrows shoot up, "Well...that sounds...like a load of crap."

She rolled her eyes, "We're not all destined to find our soul mates like your heroes Lois and Clark."

"Hey, I never said they were my heroes."

"Please. I swear, it's like you think you have to be just like them or you've failed at love."

Oliver let his jaw drop, "I don't think like that. I just think...they've kind of cornered the market when it comes to relationships."

"Uh huh, and that's why she spends most days trying to decide between wanting to kiss him and kill him?"

"See! See! You know it's true!"

Dinah let out a laugh, "Alright, I think it's about time to call it a night, Ollie."

Oliver started to laugh as he pulled out his billfold and paid for their drinks. Dinah had already started to walk out the door, so he chased after her.

"Hey, uh...thanks for coming down here," he told her. Dinah looked at him with a frown, "I know that you didn't really want to come down here and hear my sob story. I just...I guess I miss Clark's pep-talks a little bit," he laughed. "It feels good to talk to somebody."

Dinah smirked, "Clark is a man of wisdom, isn't he?"

Oliver let out a laugh, "Yeah, well, he has a way with words. But uh...I appreciate you coming down here and...yeah."

"Don't mention it, Ollie. Seriously. _Don't_."

He watched as she walked in the opposite direction, her brown hair dancing behind her.

'_Don't even start, Ollie. She will kick your ass,_' he pondered. Then he smirked. '_Of course, that can be fun too..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Obviously, this was the pre-cursor to Dinah and Oliver getting together as seen in previous chapters. I kind of figured that (and this goes back to the very beginning) I should be fair the Chlollie fans and the Dollie fans. Hopefully, I've been fair? Though it's probably been way more in the favor of Chlollie than Dollie by this point in time. But honestly, I prefer Chlollie so that's just my bad, haha.

The backstory here, as mentioned in '_Oliver_', is that Chloe was dosed with Red-K and was less than subtle about her feelings for Clark and her opinion of Oliver in comparison to Clark. I considered writing a whole chapter around that event, but it's not really an upbeat topic, haha. So I've gone for kind of writing around the event itself, and hopefully, it won't be too much of a down for everyone.

On another note, I know that I've posted this chapter and the last chapter a bit earlier than usual and my replies in the last chapter were a bit short. I feel really bad about it so I want to explain. I kind of got roped into an impromptu road trip and time (and more importantly Wi-Fi) has been difficult for posting these last couple of days. The trip ends tomorrow, so we'll be back to normal very soon.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Star City_ (where the Chlollie fans can rejoice, haha. Well...kind of, haha.)


	109. Star City

**Review Comments:**

**_alexindigo_** - I am not a fan of the actress who plays Dinah either, haha. In fact, I'm not really a fan of anything they've done with Dinah, because she's actually a really fun character in the comics and the way they've portrayed her has been pretty stale. But oh well, I doubt we'll see her again. I think he'll have to (and so will everyone else with their own) compare his relationship to Clois because they've kind of perfected it, haha. I can't think of any other comic book character with a love interest as consistent as Lois and Clark while being so very much in love. So, I think it's only natural, haha.

Never was a big fan of Margot Kidder's, but then again, she could have been Kate Bosworth, haha. Erica Durance has just portrayed Lois with so much depth and complexity that all the others pale in comparison to me. It's a hard line to walk, and she's done amazing with it. I'm not sure if we'll ever see the infamous 'M' chapter, haha, but it's on the list of ideas to consider, haha.

_**Bella Swan is Max Ride's Bitch**_ - I think I saw an interview where he said that he'll be wearing the suit, and that it looks good, haha. If we don't see him in the suit, I'm going to be very, very, very disappointed. You can't end Smallville without him becoming Superman. And he isn't Superman without the suit and there's no getting out of it when they've already shown it! Plus, the promos are pretty much implying we'll see it. Can't wait! haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Lois and Clark certainly have perfected it, haha. Without the right chemistry, it could lead to disaster, haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - That's what I was thinking, haha. Comic Dinah would have already kicked his butt, haha. I think that all the heroes ought to use Clois as the benchmark and we'l probably see a few other couples do it before we're done. They're just perfect together! I'm glad that you liked the line, haha, I was a little worried that people might not get the reference, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, hahaha. I always liked the whole "Love Triangle for Two" concept with Lois, Clark, and Superman, haha. Of course, it was more in reference to her thinking they were two different people, but I think we can still have fun with it! haha.

I tried to toe the line of hinting at something while not having him jump straight into a relationship with Dinah after breaking up with Chloe, that would have been the wrong way to go about it. It wouldn't have made Oliver look very good, that's for sure. I've always had stuff about Dinah and Ollie, so I felt like I had to do something for the Dollie fans out there. I'm not really big on either pairing, though honestly, I prefer Chlollie just because that's what I've seen the most because of the show and all. But I like to try and have a little something for everyone, haha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, subtle is one way of saying it, hahaha. We all have our preferences, no need to apologize to me, haha. I'm not the Chlollie fan club, just a writer of the people, haha. I try and be true to the canon while keeping with the show and hopefully I've been fair to Oliver's love life. It's very similar to Bruce Wayne in that way where any given fan thinks he should be with Vicki Vale, Selina Kyle, Wonder Woman, Zatanna, Silver St. Cloud, Talia al Ghul, or Sasha Bordeaux. And those are just the most common ones, haha.

Oliver is a complicated character, especially in the comics. In fact, the last time I checked in on him, he and Dinah had called it quits on their marriage, so even that is kind of not canon now, haha. It can be tough keeping these things in line.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, implied fantasized Tess/Lois, implied Oliver/Bruce bro-mance, hahaha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #109, Star City

**Author's Note:** When I write something like this: "_Example_." It means that Clark and Oliver are saying something in unison.

* * *

"Ok, Honey, Sweetie, come on. What's cooler? Batarangs?" he asked with a funny voice. "Or Arrows?" He made a face like that was the right choice.

Chloe rolled her eyes, "I'm not going to answer that."

Oliver gave her a shocked look, "Why not?"

"Because he is my ex and you are my husband. It's inappropriate for me to comment on it."

Bruce looked smug, "It's because she prefers Batarangs."

Oliver punched Bruce on the shoulder. Chloe rolled her eyes again, '_These two are impossible..._'

"I'm going to go and talk to..." she heard a clank and looked towards the kitchen. "...Zee! Don't you dare spike that punch!"

Chloe stomped away towards the kitchen and a frightened Zatanna while both Oliver and Bruce grimaced. Zatanna was in troooouuuuble.

"You two are ridiculous, you know that?" asked Lois.

Oliver and Bruce exchanged looks, "What? What did we do?"

Now Lois and Tess exchanged looks while Clark rubbed his face with his hand, '_Idiots..._'

"It's like you're children!" declared Lois.

Tess nodded, "You can't go more than five minutes without arguing about who has the cooler gadgets or who has the better costume."

"Exactly! You look like Robin Hood and you look like some kind of black bull!"

Oliver and Bruce frowned, so Lois let out an exasperated breath.

Pointing two fingers off the top of her head like horns, "_I'm Batman_," she quipped in a gravely voice.

Tess had to cling onto Clark to keep from falling over in laughter. Bruce however, did not look amused. "They are bat ears, Lois. Not horns."

"And we're not _that_ bad!" whined Oliver.

"Come on, you two are like one argument from steaming up even worse than Lois and Clark!" teased Tess.

Bruce and Oliver exchanged nervous looks, taking a step apart.

"She's right, guys. Sometimes I have nightmares of you two running away together," laughed Chloe as she walked by.

Oliver glanced at Bruce, "Where would we go?"

"Aspen is nice," replied Bruce.

"Focus!" shouted Lois.

Bruce and Oliver took another step apart. "I have to..._go_...away...and find a woman...," muttered Bruce as he left the group.

The girls laughed as Oliver hung his head, "You two...are evil...you know that? And besides! Maybe you two are in love then!"

Tess and Lois exchanged goofy looks and then simultaneously shot Oliver confused looks.

"What? It's no secret that you two didn't exactly get along! Maybe it's Lois and Tess, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"Seriously, Ollie? What are you? Five? Jo'an comes up with better stuff than that."

Tess let out a laugh and turned to Lois, "And honestly, can you imagine me and you?"

Lois and Tess started to laugh to the point that they were hanging onto each other to keep from falling. This kind of made Clark and Oliver zone out, which of course, caught the girl's interest. And then, almost in unison, they started to grin.

"Guys?"

Both Clark and Oliver snapped out of their respective trance to shout in an awkward unison, "_Of course I haven't!_"

They turned to look at each other, "_What?_"

"_Stop saying what I'm saying!_ _No! You stop saying what I'm saying!_"

Their glares intensified, though Lois and Tess were flabbergasted.

"_Knock it off! No! You knock it off!_"

Lois shook her head repeatedly, "What the hell was that?"

Both Clark and Oliver looked away sheepishly. Lois exchanged a glance with Tess, who was covering her mouth and doing her best not to laugh. Lois stared at the duo until they each mumbled something under their breath, "Umm, what was that, Smallville?"

Oliver pumped his fist quietly and whispered, "_Yes_."

Clark shot him a glare, "Uh...it was...uh...nothing...Sweetie."

"Didn't sound like nothing."

He looked at Tess, who was bright red from holding in her laugh. Then he looked at Oliver, who was giving him some sort of '_don't-you-dare-throw-me-under-the-bus/this-is-going-to-be-awesome_' hybrid smirk. Then he looked to Lois, who was looking at him expectantly.

Then Clark Kent had an idea.

With a _whoosh_, he had Lois Lane in his arms and was kissing her absolutely senseless. Tess and Oliver had equally surprised looks. When Lois came up for air, Clark rested his forehead against Lois's and sighed deeply. "Mom has Jo'an until tomorrow night. Wanna go home?"

Her eyes grew big and she nodded, causing Clark to break into a full blown grin. "Happy Birthday, Tess," she whispered breathlessly Her eyes never leaving Clark's. In a flash, they were flying out the window and into the sky towards Smallville, KS.

"It's Chloe's birthday...not mine..." muttered Tess in shock.

Oliver started to clap his hands dramatically. "And he sticks the landing! That...was..._awesome_!"

Chloe walked over, "What just happened?"

"He made her forget what idiots we just were by kissing her senseless," he wiped a tear from his eye. "I'm so proud right now."

She frowned and then smirked, "What did you do to make her think you were an idiot?"

Gulp.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? hahaha. I remember someone saying something in the reviews I think about Clark, Tess, and Lois, and I just had this funny idea that maybe Clark had thought of them like that, haha. And then I thought, well, Oliver seems even more likely to have those thoughts, doesn't he? And then I thought, oh boy, I should have them both accidentally reveal they are naughty boys! haha.

To Lois and Tess no less! hahaha.

And of course, the setting for the story opened up the door for Oliver and Bruce to butt heads again! haha. I know how much we all love that, haha. I'm not going to lie, I loved writing this one, haha. It was a lot of fun. Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I think it's going to be '_Birthday_'.


	110. Birthday

**Review Comments:**

**_alexindigo_** - Haha, I would hope so! That would be one tangled pile of limbs and awesomeness! hahaha. Justin Hartley will be back soon, I think he's back right after 'Kent' and 'Booster', so we'll have more Green Arrow awesomeness. Though it might come with that Omega symbol...dun-dun-duuuun, haha.

Well, I originally wanted to go canon and have Ollie with Dinah and that left Chloe in the cold. And since Bruce doesn't really have a constant partner and I _really_ didn't want to kill off such a popular character, I paired them together. But then my inner Bruce/Diana came out, and Season 10 has really brought out the Chlollie fan in me, and so I've just got this crazy blur of pairing going on, haha. More than anything, my timeline is broken down by who is with who at what point in time, hahaha. That's the only way I can really keep my sanity at this point! haha.

Erica Durance has had the unusual opportunity to grow and develop her Lois Lane, so I have to cut the others some slack. But even from the get-go, she was more of the Lois Lane I've always wanted than any of the others. She just nails it. That simple, haha. I won't even get started on the new Superman movie because lets face it, I'm not very excited right now. I'm going to be there opening night, but I'm not excited...

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Oh, I plan on having it come back around on him, haha. Lois Lane is a lot of things. Forgetful? Not one of them, hahaha.

**_Katlynne_** - I'm still upset with you, *pouts*, ending '_My Nemisis_', *huffs and runs away...then comes back because I live in a tiny apartment and needs to finish review comments to post the chapter*. hahahaha. I _guess_ I can forgive you for a second, haha. I'm glad that you liked it! Isn't Oliver the best? hahaha. And I totally stole that Aspen bit from Scrubs, haha, it's one of my all-time favorite lines. Me and my friend use it all the time, hahaha.

I think we'll have to have a sequel where we see Oliver's fate as well as Clark's fate, because Lois Lane don't forget, hahaha. You have a top 10? haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, especially Oliver and Bruce! haha. They're the worst!

**_Bella Swan is Max Ride's Bitch_** - I don't think you're wrong, hahaha. He is married to Lois Lane and all her costumes after all! haha. Not Jo'an...

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, everyone seems to want an M chapter these days, hahaha. This long break must be getting to you guys! hahaha. I think that if Clark is going to marry Lois Lane, he's going to have to be at least a little naughty, hahaha. I thought about putting Carter in, but I wasn't sure if it was too soon to include him timeline-wise since I'm not sure where the Shayera and Carter chapters sit. He would have been a great addition though, haha.

**_superrogue17_** - I just wish that we had more goofy Tom Welling and Justin Hartley on the show, they were epic in 'Fortune'.

_**Leli1013**_ - Hahaha, I know, right? I can just hear Erica Durance making her voice all deep and gravely too! hahaha.

_**maggs**_ - Yes! Someone got it! hahahaha. I love Scrubs and that's one of my all-time favorite lines! haha. Thank you!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Mentions of Clana, hints of Clois, and the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #110, Birthday

**Author's Note: **I was inspired by crimsonandcloveroverandover's "_She Paints Me Blue_" to write this. If you haven't read it, it's great! Read it!

* * *

"It's really of sweet of you to help with all of this, Lois."

Lois grinned. "Well, with everything that Smallville has been through with..." Lois turned red as Martha frowned, "...well, you know..."

Martha smiled, "It's ok, Lois. Jonathan's passing has been hard on all of us."

The younger woman hung her head for a moment before trying to lighten the mood, "And of course, all his drama with _Lana_," Lois said it in a tone and made a face that made Martha let out a laugh, "I just think that he needs to have a good night."

Martha grinned widely, "You better be careful, Lois."

She looked up from the frosting she was mixing up with a confused expression.

"You keep talking like that, somebody might think you actually care about my son," giggled Martha.

Lois nearly dropped the bowl before blushing, "Mrs. K, shhhh!" Martha laughed. "You're going to ruin my reputation!" laughed Lois.

"Don't worry," laughed Martha. "Your secret is safe with me."

"He just gets under a girl's skin, you know?"

Martha snickered.

"Honestly, I don't know how you put with him, Mrs. K. Half the time, I wanna rip the head off his plaid covered body," laughed Lois.

"And the other half?"

Lois froze. "Uh..."

"I've got candles!"

Lois and Martha turned to see Chloe standing in the doorway with a couple grocery bags. "What? What did I miss?"

"Nothing!" shouted Lois, which only caused Martha's grin to widen. "Uh, nothing. What kind of color candles did you get, Cuz?"

Chloe eyed Lois suspiciously and turned her gaze to Martha. In an attempt to save Lois from further embarrassment, Martha turned to the sink.

"...I got yellow ones, just like you asked."

Lois grinned, "Perfect. It'll look perfect with the red letters and the blue cake."

The blonde frowned at her. "What?"

"How does yellow go perfect with red and blue?" questioned Chloe.

Lois looked at her like she was crazy, "Uh...if Clark Kent was a country, those would pretty much be the flag's colors, Chlo."

Chloe's eyebrows shot up into her bangs as she exchanged looks with Martha.

"What?" asked Lois nervously.

"Nothing," they muttered in unison.

Lois huffed and went back to mixing her frosting. "They _are _his favorite colors," muttered Lois.

"They are," comforted Martha. "And it's very sweet of you to make a whole cake just for Clark, sweetie."

Lois turned to Chloe and stuck her tongue out at her, "Ha!"

Chloe rolled her eyes and smirked, "If you think that's sweet, Mrs. K, ask Lois what she got Clark for his birthday."

To call what Lois shot at Chloe a '_Death Glare_', would have been putting it mildly.

"Oh really? What did you get for him?"

Lois started to shake her head and stall, "It's nothing," she muttered. "Just a little something..."

"Come on, Lois. Tell her," teased Chloe.

The feisty brunette was seriously considering dumping the icing on Chloe's head. "I got him...I got him a journal, ok?"

Martha looked at Lois with a stunned look. Apparently, Lois took this as Martha not thinking it was great.

"I just thought...you know...he's always brooding away up in that loft. Maybe it would help if he could...get some of those feelings out."

"No, Lois...that is a very thoughtful gift. Clark is going to love it."

Lois looked at Chloe victoriously, so Chloe rolled her eyes.

"Personally? I think Lois just wants Clark to write down some of his secrets so that she can sneak a peak," she teased.

Martha rolled her eyes as Lois chased Chloe with a spatula covered in blue frosting.

Once things settled down, Martha took a moment to think about this night. She had spent all of Clark's birthdays with Jonathan by her side. His absence was almost too overwhelming for her. But at the same time, she felt like there was a new part of the family. Not taking his place by any stretch, but Lois Lane was definitely part of this family now. No matter how much she liked to deny it, Lois cared about Clark.

Martha fondly recalled the way that Lois deemed the first two cakes "not good enough" for Clark. And as she watched Lois coat the latest cake with her tongue sticking out in concentration, she realized just how much Lois cared about her son. _Her_ _Smallville_.

Lois had gone out of her way to hang a banner. She scattered string and confetti under the promise that she would clean it up later.

A smile formed on Martha's face as she remembered how Jonathan used to tease her about how alike she and Lois were. And how if Clark was anything like his father, they were going to have to build a new cellar to lock Clark in when he finally realized a thing or two.

"Everybody! Quiet!" shouted Lois, oblivious to the fact that her cohorts were standing mere feet away. "I just heard the truck pull in!"

Martha smiled at Lois from across the kitchen with a glow in her heart as Lois sprinted to shut off all the lights.

'_It might be Clark's birthday, but it's Jonathan that's getting a present,_' she mused as she watched Lois shake with anticipation. '_Somewhere, he is looking down right now, and he is laughing. Because he knew._' she smiled._ 'Jonathan had known it all along..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? For those of you that didn't notice, this took place prior to Season 5's '_Oracle_'. After reading 'She Paints Me Blue' (which I highly recommend, btw), I was just jones-ing to watch that episode and I kind of thought Lois looked considerably more excited than either Chloe or Martha about Clark's birthday party and I started to wonder why that might be.

This is what I came up with.

I tried to keep it light and I hope that I had Lois in the right state of mind for this point in time. I tried to keep her from actually saying anything, but still having a hint or two that she might be noticing our favorite farmboy more than she'd like to admit, haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _the News Room_.


	111. News Floor

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, he had his moments of goodness before Season 10! Come on! hahaha. And yeah, it all really led up to the Harley Speech in that episode and I'm going to have another chapter that takes place during 'Oracle' featuring Lois that will only add to the notion, haha. So look out for that one!

I thought at first that maybe what we were going to see was Lois Lane becoming Chloe's "_stage name_" of sorts for a while there. She was far too plucky and into journalism for me not to see a connection, and I always thought they were setting up the Chloe/Clark relationship to be the final outcome. Especially with the way things turned out towards the end of Season 1. But it turned out she was just channelling the family blood, haha.

I don't want to see Tess die either. Lex does have a sister named Lena, so maybe they'll keep her on...

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Martha Kent is one of the strongest characters on the show. No doubt about it. She stood strong for Clark.

**_cathy03_** - Thanks! And you should! It was great!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, I think Lois is excited about any sort of celebration! She was pumped for Graduation too (which I'm writing! haha).

_**sasslady**_ - Yeah, without Papa-K, it's always going to feel like there is going to be a void. But at least Lois is helping fill the holes in their hearts.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #111, the News Floor

**Author's Note: **I was watching '_Lois & Clark_' the other day, and I just had to expand upon one of my favorite scenes ever! Enjoy!

* * *

**Idea:** A day in the life of Jimmy Olsen, photographer for the Daily Planet.

'_Life is good._'

Jimmy gazed through the gap of his converse shoes that were propped up on his desk. He had the girl. He had the job. Hell, Jimmy even had the best two mentors a Daily Planet intern could have asked for. "Olsen! Get your butt in here!"

But his boss? Well, he was a bit rough around the the edges. Jimmy walked in to see Perry White, Lois Lane, and Clark Kent waiting for him.

"Yeah, Chief?"

Perry rolled his eyes, '_Damn kids are never going to stop calling me that._'

"I want you explain something to me here...I send you to a boring banquet and you bring me three thousand boring pictures. Yet Superman saves a man from drowning on 3rd Avenue this morning while you stand there watching the whole thing and you don't even bring me one picture."

Lois and Clark exchanged amused glances while Jimmy sputtered, "Chief! I didn't have my camera with me!"

Perry rolled his eyes, "Olsen!" Jimmy started to mouth along, "A photographer _eats_ with his camera! A photographer _sleeps_ with his camera!"

"I'm glad I'm a writer," quipped Lois.

Jimmy laughed loudly but did his best to stifle it after Perry glared at him.

"Olsen, you've got to pull that camera out of your-"

"Chief!" yelled Lois.

"...and get me some shots of Superman!"

Jimmy rolled his eyes, "It's not always the easiest shot to get! He is kind of faster than a speeding bullet."

"Be the guy's pal, then! Make the sacrifice. Look at Lois. Do you know how she gets all those interviews?"

Both Lois and Clark looked away awkwardly.

"Do you see that Jimmy? Do you see that awkwardness?"

Both Lois and Clark exchange nervous glances before fixing their eyes on their editor. '_Uh oh..._'

Perry paused dramatically, and even Clark was sweating a little bit.

"Superman has the hots for Clark's wife."

And now, both Lois and Clark let out sighs of relief.

"But Clark here..." Perry wrapped an arm around Clark's shoulders, "...he takes one for the team, don't you, Clark?"

Clark looked up at Perry with a smirk, "Yeah...it's tough though, Perry. Real tough."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Come on, Smallville. We've got a story to cover and all this girl talk is starting to make me dizzy."

As the Dynamic Duo spun out of the editor's office, Perry looked out on them fondly.

"Now that there, Olsen, is a Daily Planet team. Poor Clark though. It's gotta be tough seeing Lois flirt with Superman sometimes."

Jimmy nodded, "Yeah, they're pretty awesome."

Lois and Clark walked through the news floor arm-in-arm. "Well...that was awkward."

"Yeah," laughed Clark. "But I think I can take one for the team. You know, so my wife can get the interviews?"

She looked at him with a wicked grin, "I hate to tell you, Smallville. But's not all an act."

Clark's eyes narrowed but his smile widened.

"I sure like the look of Superman in those tights," she quipped before walking towards their office.

He stood there for a few moments in shock before grinning like a madman. '_I knew it!_'

"Smallville!"

Perry and Jimmy looked out of the door office to see Lois scamper on over towards Clark. She looked both ways to check if the coast was clear before whispering something into Clark's ear. Clark listened intently before slouching over and letting out a groan. Jimmy faintly heard the word, "Mxy."

After a moment of pouting and sighing, Clark stood up and let Lois drag him towards the elevator.

"Do you ever get the impression...that we'll never know everything that's going on with those two?"

Jimmy looked up, "Chief?"

"Yeah?"

He looked away shyly before gathering some confidence, "Instead of always standing around watching Lois and Clark...wondering what they're doing...what if we get lives of our own that are a little more interesting."

Perry looked over with a smile, "Son, you just hit the bull's eye. It's like we're supporting characters in some TV Show and it's only about them."

"Yeah, and it's like all we do is advance their plots."

"To tell you the truth, I'm sick of it," muttered Perry.

Jimmy's nodding because a bit more enthusiastic, "Man, me too!"

And that's when he saw her.

_Lucy Lane_.

She walked onto the news floor and even amongst all the chaos of the Planet, Jimmy thought she looked oh so beautiful as he fiddled with the box in his pocket. "You know what, Chief?" Perry let out a gruff sound in reply. "I think I'm going to start on my own plot right about now..."

Perry turned his head to ask Jimmy what the hell he was talking about, but Jimmy was already exiting the office. He pushed aside reporters and interns alike as he ventured through the crowd. Lucy saw him from afar and gave him a megawatt smile, which only strengthened his resolve.

"Lucy?"

She frowned at the nervousness in his tone, "Everything ok, Bowtie?"

Jimmy grinned at the nickname. '_Just like Lois and Clark,_' he thought with a giddy smile.

"Yeah..." he looked away shyly, "...everything is...great."

Lucy let out a laugh, "You're worrying me, Jimmy. What's going on?"

"Uh...well...I love you, Luce." Her cheeks when slightly red, "And uh...it's uh...it's not your everyday...you know...love. It's...more than that. I love you with all my heart. When you're trying to drag me into the nearest janitor's closet to jump me-" Lucy blushed and yelped, "Jimmy!"

He let out a laugh, "And even when you're trying to find a shovel because you're planning on killing me."

Lucy rolled her eyes and laughed. "Jimmy...what's this all about?"

Jimmy swallowed deeply, trying to find that last bit of courage that he needed.

"It's all about me and you. I love you, Luce. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

He crouched down onto one knee and grabbed Lucy's hand, pulling out the small velvet box. Every reporter, intern, and photographer stopped and stared as Lucy gasped. Jeff the Intern dropped his coffee mug, breaking into a dozen pieces. Opening the box, he looked at her lovingly.

"Lucy Lane. Will you marry me?"

As Perry watched Lucy jump at Jimmy and tackle him to the floor with a kiss, he let out a huff. "Great Cesar's Ghost..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I absolutely loved that bit about Jimmy and Perry being supporting characters in some TV show and it's been easily my all-time favorite moment between those two, Lois & Clark really made those two shine.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I might be '_Mongul_', but it's going to have that darker edge to it...so heads up.


	112. Mongul

**Review Comments:**

**_jade2nightwing_** - Oh, that chapter is in the works. As well as the chapter where Lois _finishes_ dealing with Lucy and Jimmy when she finds out, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - It might be, haha. Jo'an certainly inherited it! hahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - I haven't read that one, haha, but I have thought countless times, "why doesn't anyone notice that Superman clearly has a thing for Lois Lane?" hahaha. I think it would be great for someone to mention it in some movie or show sometime, haha.

Haha, yes, I can tell you're just a tiny bit bitter, hahaha. And yes, I have seen the movement, haha. I have to admit that it crossed my mind at one point, but it was mainly because I just couldn't imagine a Superman related program without Lois Lane. I mean, they tried that in Superman 3 and 4, how did that work out guys? haha. Lois = Superman. They can't have one without the other (I can hear Al Bundy laughing in my head, hahaha).

And as for Clois-y friendship in the Oracle-related chapter, don't expect too much Clark, haha. In fact, expect lots of your least favorite character, haha. But I promise to spin it in a very Clois kind of way, haha. Even if Lois doesn't realize it! hahaha.

_**sasslady**_ - I think he's trying to follow in his buddy CK's footsteps, haha. I like to think that Jimmy idolizes Mr. Clark, I mean Kent! Mr. Kent! haha. I loved Sam Huntington as Jimmy Olsen in Superman Returns. One of it's brightest moments, haha. I think you hit the nail on the head though, the all-around cast of characters in the Superman Universe makes it on par with the likes of Spiderman and X-Men. They are tremendous.

**_Kinnari3_** - I wouldn't say that just yet. As far as I know, Michael McKean is set to reprise his role as Perry White before it's all over. Maybe, _just maybe_, they will give us a little Jimmy Olsen actin to go along with that. I know that I would be beyond giddy to see that!

_**Bianca**_ - Haha, I'm sure she'll be back very soon. She's hard to keep away, haha.

**_cathy03_** - I can't take all the credit, haha, it was on the show! haha. And yeah he does! haha. I think that you could probably make a show centered around Jimmy Olsen, and all the craziness that you see at the Daily Planet, using Lois and Clark and Perry and Lucy and other folk as supporting characters. Oh, I would watch that show in a heart beat, haha. It'd be like a cross of Smallville with Chuck, not the Intersect, but all the nerd-awesomeness! hahaha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - I also love the line about Lois and Clark eloping when they come to work in the same clothes and Perry thinks that Clark looks haggard. That was the perfect Perry White, though I'm torn between that Jimmy Olsen and the Sam Huntington Jimmy Olsen from Superman Returns. I really thought he did a great job of making him such a dork, haha. And oh yeah, Lois is going to freak out, hahaha. Big time! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV. I also don't own the Justice League animated show, that would also be under the property of Warner Bros, so really, just one more reason for me to be jealous.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #112, Mongol

**Author's Note:** This chapter features a scene based of one of my all-time favorite Superman fight scenes from the Justice League series.

* * *

Violence was never Plan A with Superman. But when it was required, he wasn't afraid to fight. And right now...it was required.

**AN HOUR EARLIER**

"Smallville, knock it off."

Clark grinned wickedly, "Lo-is."

She rolled her eyes but couldn't help but smile as she pushed his foot away, "I'm serious, Clark."

He raised his foot to rub up against her calf away, "But I already finished my article," he whined in a child's voice.

"Well, I don't have fleet kryptonian fingers, now do I?"

"I've never heard you complain about my fleet kryptonian fingers before," he teased.

This made Lois blush crimson, "Shut your face, Smallville," she muttered unconvincingly.

With a _whoosh_, he was behind her and rubbing her shoulders. They both knew that her defenses were falling. "Or what, Lois? Are you going to kill me this time?" He leaned down to breath close to her ear, "Or are you threatening me with something else?" he asked in a sultry voice.

He felt her shiver beneath his touch, which gave him the confidence to spin her chair around. She faced him with a smirk.

"You just can't keep your hands off me, can you?"

Clark smiled something sinister, "I guess even Superman has his faults."

"Tell me about it," she teased.

In a swift motion he had her out of her chair and up on the desk. He was kissing her neck when she felt a tremor, "Did you feel that?"

"You bet I did."

She let out a laugh, "No. Seriously. Did you feel that just now?"

Clark looked up at her with an exasperated look, "Loi-"

Something crashed through the wall of the Daily Planet and grabbed Clark roughly. "Nighty night, Kryptonian."

A fist, glowing green, punched him through the opposite wall. Clark rocketed towards the ground, he muttered one final word, "Mongol."

**PRESENT TIME**

When Clark awoke, he was in a crater in the middle of Broadway avenue. He tried to recall his last memory. It was a fist. A glowing fist. A green glowing fist rocketing towards his face. _Kryptonite_. Then he remembered the arm, and the body, and then the face.

So that's why he was here.

To find his wife. To fight. He shook with rage as he growled, "Where is she?"

Clark stood mere feet away from Mongol, but Mongol didn't seem afraid. "I know your reputation, Kryptonian. You won't kill me."

His eyes flashed with rage. "You're right. I'm not going to kill you." Mongol actually had the nerve to look smug about Superman's declaration. "But I am going to hurt you. Very, very badly," he told Mongol as he punched him down the street. The pavement broke under Mongol's slide.

"You know, I feel like I live in a world made out of _cardboard_. Always taking constant care not to break something. To break someone. Never allowing myself to lose control, even for a moment, or someone could die," Clark snarled. "But you can take it, can't you Big Man?"

A flicker of fear shot through Mongol's face as he rose, but he formed his own snarl as Clark advanced on him.

"What we have here is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose, and show you just how powerful...I really am."

The two shot at one another at breakneck speeds, but to them, it almost felt like they were going in slow motion. Mongol raised his fist to swing, Clark did the same. The only difference is that Mongol stayed at the same speed. Somehow, Clark actually sped up.

Flying through the air, Mongol bashed through building after building after building. And just as he crashed through the last building on his way back to Earth, Clark flew around to meet him mid-air. Clark raised his hands over his head and smashed Mongol to the streets below.

Mongol burrowed deep into the street below, the debris must have floated for blocks. The air become dense with smoke and dust.

He barely managed to rise to his feet when he saw Superman floating behind him, "Had enough?"

"Not quite yet," snarled Mongol.

Clark shot towards him at speeds that even Mongol couldn't comprehend, "Then let's try this."

With each blow, Mongol and Superman dug deeper into the ground. After the first three or four blows, Mongol simply laid there.

"Where is she!"

Another punch delivered, "I asked you a question, Mongol!"

Over his shoulder, Clark faintly saw a large dark object landing on the street above, but he didn't stop. "Answer me!"

"Stop!"

He recognized the voice as Bruce Wayne's.

"Damn it, Superman! Stop!"

But he didn't, he just kept landing blow after blow. He was going to beat the answer out of Mongol if he had to.

"He can't answer you if he's dead!"

At this point, Bruce had gotten to Clark and was trying to pull him away from Mongol. The tears were threatening to fall from Clark's eyes as he let Bruce push him away from Mongol, landing on the ground with a thud. The truth is, Bruce couldn't have pushed Clark away in a million years.

That was enough for Bruce to realize that Clark was done with his assault on Mongol.

"Where is she?" Clark whispered.

Mongol shifted just barely under his pile of rubble. "L...Lu...Luthor."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Cliffhanger, eh? hahaha. I know that in the scene in question, '_Destroyer_' from Justice League Unlimited, it didn't go like this and Clark was fighting Darkseid. Don't worry. I haven't lost my mind, haha. Well, not about this anyways, haha. I just loved that sequence where Clark absolutely let go and whipped some super-villain butt and I knew that I wanted something similar for this chapter, so why not use it? haha.

So, this one _was_ a bit on the dark side and the cliff hanger is going to lead into another chapter. And for those of you that haven't guess it, yes, it will be the chapter that I asked you guys about Lex for before. Lex is returning. And Lex is a bad, bad man, hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought about this one! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Washington, DC_.


	113. Washington, DC

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Lol, you can't blame me for that! haha. Drama is good for a relationship! hahaha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Awww, haha. You're going to make me blush! I'm glad that I could create some fun between Perry and Jimmy, I kind of imagine them as just the cutest little air around, haha. They're like outsiders in their own newsroom sometimes! haha. Like a Dr. Cox and JD sort of thing, haha. You will get a chapter where Lois find out about it and I'll drop a a hint: Good Cop, Bad Cop. hahaha.

I'm glad that you liked Mongul! It was a real risk putting something like that out there but so far it seems like people liked it! haha. I know everyone is upset that it left on a cliff hanger and all, but the fact that they want _more_ is encouraging! haha. As for Lex, I haven't decided if it's his return to the Smallville world or not, but I'm thinking that it's not going to be. Maybe their first throw down since he's been back though. And lets just say that Lex is going to last a bit longer than you might think, haha. And yep, Mrs. K is back in action!

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I too love ass kicking Clark and I hope we see a lot of him when he goes toe-to-toe with Booster, at least while the two are at odds, and then Darkseid in the big finale! I originally envisioned something like this for my '_Darkseid_' chapter, but I decided to go with more of a "_how he gets the suit and how he gets named Superman_" route instead. So we're on the same page! haha.

Believe me, you are going to get a lot of Clois good-iness from that chapter. Even if Clark isn't in it, haha. And if anybody feels like they have to put up with Mad Dog Lane? Consider this my announcement to take her off of your hands, hahaha.

**_Bella Swan is Max Ride's Bitch_** - You're going to find out! haha. Don't worry, Lois Lane will be found! I really hope that we have a scene like that as well where Clark puts the whole Superman Show up in big, bright lights as he whips Darkseid's butt.

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that you still liked it! haha. Like I was telling alexindigo, I originally envisioned something like this for the '_Darkseid_' chapter, but went in more of a "_how he gets the suit and how he gets named Superman_" direction instead. Plus, for that scene in particular, I'm not sure that Clark's speech about feeling like he lives in a world of cardboard would have fit since he hasn't fully tapped into his Superman powers yet.

**_cathy03_** - Hahaha, geeze you guys are demanding! hahaha. It'll come soon. I wouldn't leave you guys hanging like that for too long, haha.

_**jade2nightwing**_ - I'm not evil! hahaha. I'm just...a fan of building suspense! haha. That's what I am! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #113, Washington

**Author's Note:** I was re-watching 'Isis' since I totally spaced during '_Homecoming_', and I thought, "Lois sure seems frazzled,' haha.

* * *

_Knock. Knock._

Martha looked up with a frown from her desk. "Come in."

The door swung up and Lois Lane rushed in, "Hey, Mrs. K, you busy?" Before Martha could reply, Lois continued. "Good, because I am freaking out!"

"Lois? What are you doing here? I thought you were in Egypt?"

Pacing and biting her nails, Lois turned wildly, "Huh? Oh, I was. I'm coming back. My flight has a layover here in DC, and I really need to talk to you."

"What's wrong?" asked Martha, her expression one of concern. "Are you ok?"

Lois stopped and gulped. "I know Clark's secret."

Martha froze. "What do you mean you know Clark's secret?"

"Uh...well...I don't know how to tell you this, but Clark is the Blur. He fell out of the sky and I pulled this blue dagger out of him and got back up and blurred away! I know that this is stressful, wait, why are you smiling?" Martha opened her mouth to reply, but couldn't find the words.

Lois frowned. "Wait a minute, you know! Of course you know! You're his mother!"

"Well...yeah," chuckled Martha.

With a ragged breath, Lois started to pace again, "Freaking out, freaking out, freaking out, freaking out, freakin-"

"Lois."

She looked up at Martha with a wild expression, "Mrs. K, I don't know what I'm going to do."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I ran away because Lex-"

"Lex?"

"Not _the_ Lex. He told me that I was going to hold Clark back. And then I went to Egypt with Perry, and then I met one of Clark's friends. And he's one of, you know, Clark's _friends_? And he told me that maybe I was the one that was going to make Clark's burden easier. So I decided to come back, but then I started to think that maybe Carter just wants his friend to be happy, I mean, let's face it. Lex doesn't want things to be easier on Clark and he thought that I was going to be the one to make things harder on him! I just don't know what to think anymore!"

Lois spoke so fast that Martha's head was spinning.

"And what if he's angry? What if he's angry that I didn't tell him? What if he's angry that I found out? I don't want to be the girl that pried into his secret, you know how big of a deal that is to him! That's what wrecked him and Lana! I can't lose Clark, Mrs. K. I can't."

"Lois, Clark's greatest fear is that when he tells someone his secret, that they won't see him as Clark anymore."

She frowned at Martha's statement, so Martha continued.

"The reason that Lana and Clark never worked was because she stopped seeing him as Clark. She started seeing him as the Blur. All he wants is to be himself. He doesn't want the ones that he loves most to see him as anything else."

Lois frowned and looked away, "I don't know, Mrs. K, the Blur thing is kind of a big deal."

"But does it change the way that you feel about him? The way that you see him?"

Lois started to smile. "No. Not really. I still wanna kill him half the time, powers and all," she laughed. "And then there's the kissing-"

Martha held up a hand with a laugh.

"Sorry, Mrs. K," blushed Lois. "I just don't know how this is going work."

The older brunette smiled warmly, "It will. Trust me. I know you and I know Clark. You're _are _the one that he needs."

"But-"

"There are no buts, Lois. Even Jonathan knew it."

Lois felt her jaw drop at that, "What?"

Martha smiled and gave Lois's arm a squeeze, "He saw the bond that you two share a long time ago. What makes you and Clark so special is that you two have always been there for each other. And you brought out a side of Clark that we had never seen before."

"What kind of side?" whispered Lois.

"The side that's given him the strength, and the confidence, to be the Blur. To be the hero that the world needs him to be."

Lois started to smile softly. She felt awful special to have Martha talk about her like that.

"I know that it's going to be...a transition for you two, but he is the same Clark Kent that you've known all along," explained Martha.

"He's still _Smallville_," whispered Lois.

Martha smiled, "Exactly."

"But...how do I tell him that I know? Do I wait for him to tell me? What if he never tells me?"

"Lois, slow down. It's all going to work out. I promise."

"But how can you be so sure? I mean, no offense Mrs. K, but you spent the bulk of your life with Mr. Kent...Mr. Right. What if I'm not good enough for him now? I mean, look at him! He's the Blur! His destiny is so much greater than mine..."

Martha grabbed Lois by the arm and gave her a sharp look.

"I don't ever want to hear you talk like that, Lois. Clark can do some amazing things, but he's still Clark. Don't you ever think you're not good enough for my son. That's not the Lois Lane I know." Lois looked away, so Martha pulled her face back. "That's not the Lois Lane my son fell in love with."

"Love?"

Martha wanted to laugh, "You're not going to have a very long career at the Daily Planet if you can't see that one, Lois."

Lois smiled shyly, "You really think so?"

"I know so," smiled Martha before she enveloped Lois in a hug. Pulling back she looked into Lois's eyes. "He needs you Lois. More than you know."

Lois felt like melting. '_I guess it's a Kent thing,_' she considered. "Thanks, Mrs. K."

Martha brushed a stray hair out of Lois's face. "Anytime. Now go get my son," she laughed.

"Aye, aye," saluted Lois.

Giving Lois a hug, Martha sent her on the way. She went back to her desk and sat down with a sigh and then a laugh.

'_Even with x-ray vision, Clark isn't going to see this one coming..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to do a little number with Martha and Lois, and for whatever reason, watching 'Isis' made me think that with all the stress that Lois was going through, she had to talk to someone, right? And who better than Mrs. K? haha. I know that Lois was much more vulnerable in this chapter, but I think that given the territory, she had to be. It must have been insane trying to sort out what the right thing was to do and I have to imagine that she was constantly in flux on whether to return home to Clark or not.

I hope it works though, and I hope that it fits with where the characters and story was at around this time. It's a tough line to walk, but I figure this would take place right before '_Supergirl_'. And I tried to leave Lois at least a little undecided so that her kind of worrying and talking to Kara and all her hesitance in '_Homecoming_' would still make sense. Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking '_Queen' Tower_', but don't kill me if it's not! haha.


	114. Smallville, KS

**Review Comments:**

**Lateness Note:** I'm really sorry guys, I'm not sure what's going on here, haha. I've been locked out since like mid-afternoon yesterday. This is the first that I've been able to get in and I wanted to post as quickly as I could. Hopefully everything has been fixed, and we should be back to normal! Thanks for your patience!

_**alexindigo**_ - Yeah, things were just crazy yesterday and for most of today! I'm not sure what that was all about. It was a site issue.

Anyways, yes! Martha and Lois together is always gold. I love those scenes on the show. I wish we had more of them! I too felt like maybe a lot of Martha's best lines were used on Chloe when they ought to have been saved for Lois, but such is life on Smallville, haha. Maybe when Martha returns we'll get to see some more scenes between her and Lois. At least that's what I'm crossing my fingers for, haha.

Put 'em up, mister! haha. I'll fight for Lois Lane! haha. But yeah, I don't think Clark is going to let her go anytime soon, and I'm not sure that I'm in a position to fight him and all her Superman-Awesomeness, hahaha. I can't wait for Smallville to be back, and I don't think they could screw it up if they tried, especially after I heard the spoilers for 'Prophecy'! I'm so excited to see that one! It's going to be absolutely epic!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - There was something wrong with the site, I couldn't get on either! haha. But now all seems to be back to normal! I'm glad that you liked it. I think Martha has always been a mentor for Lois and that should only grow as her relationship with Clark blossoms .

_**Mpj891**_ - My 900th review! I feel so honored! hahaha. Anyways! haha. I really wanted to do a bit where Lois talks to someone about the emotional chaos that it must have been to find out Clark's secret and then find her place in his life as a result of that. Martha seemed like not only the obvious chioce, but almost the only choice because she's the only one that without a doubt wouldn't betray Clark if Lois were to tell her (and Martha didn't know, haha).

_**sasslady**_ - I know that someone somewhere is waiting to say that "Lois Lane is a strong woman! She isn't insecure! Quit looking down on women!" haha. But I do love seeing Lois Lane insecure because she's only really insecure when it comes to Clark and because she's such a strong woman, it really just underlines how much Clark Kent means to her. And to me, those are great moments in Clois history. I just love that.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Kara/Bart

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #114, Smallville, Kansas

**Author's Note: **I know this one was supposed to be 'Queen Tower', but I wanted to get a chapter up ASAP and this one was closer to being ready! Anyways, I was thinking about how I wished there were more Kara/Lois scenes around, so here's one of the ones I came up with.

* * *

Not that she would have noticed it, but the Smallville air was a bit chilly at night.

Nope.

Kara Kent could hang out in the Fortress of Solitude all day in her trademark shorts and sweatshirt. Just like she was tonight. Except tonight, she was sitting in the loft of the Kent Barn. Her cousin Kal-El had told her plenty of times how it was great place to think.

And tonight, that's exactly what she needed to do. She needed to think.

It wasn't like she had doubts about her feelings for the man she was supposed to marry tomorrow. She loved Bart Allen. He was kind of her opposite in so many ways. While she had her awkward social moments, he seemed to melt into every situation and become the life of the party. She thought it was just the cutest thing the way that he ran around with little Jo'an and let her call him Bobo.

And most importantly, Bart was a good man. He had his immature moments, but she had her overly conservative moments just as often. In a lot of ways they had made each other better. He made her a little more outgoing and she brought out a more mature Bart.

A side that Bruce Wayne had thanked her for at least a couple thousand times.

"Kara? You up here?"

She turned to see her sister-in-law? Or maybe her cousin-in-law? She turned to see Lois, her cousin's wife.

"Hey Lois."

The brunette popped her head over the railing. "Don't tell me brooding is genetic," she teased. "Jo'an is already a handful."

Kara let out a laugh. "I'm not brooding."

"Uh huh, that's what Smallville used to tell me," laughed Lois. "What's on your mind?"

"Oh, you know, just thinking about the wedding. And Bart. And the future."

Lois nodded gently, "Starting to feel some cold feet?"

"No!" This brought made Lois grin. "No, not at all. Nothing like that. It's just a big day. Lots of people. You know I'm not good with people."

"Meh, you do better than Clark does. I swear, that boy is not cut out for entertaining," chuckled Lois.

Kara grinned, "You always seem to know what to say, Lois."

"I think it's a motherhood thing. It's like I'm channelling some higher-power. Like Oprah."

"Oprah?"

Lois frowned, "Come on, Kara...you've gotta get out of that rock you've been living under! Even _God_ watches Oprah."

Kara laughed and shoot her head, Lois was quite the character sometimes.

"So come on, what's up? What's got you all cooped up here with the spiders and the dust bunnies?"

The blonde looked away shyly, "Were you scared? You know...getting married?"

Lois gave her a look, "Are you kidding me?" Immediately, Kara hung her head. Of course Lois wouldn't be scared. She is perfect with Kal-El. They have a wonderful life together and a wonderful daughter. Lois was probably as calm and comfortable as she could be.

"I was scared out of my mind!"

Kara's head shot up, "You were?"

"Seriously? I was hitching my wagon onto Smallville's...forever. That as scary as it gets." Lois laughed. "And I've been kidnapped by a few of his less than friendly acquaintances. I was an absolute wreck before we got to the chruch."

"Really?"

Lois shook her head, "Hell yeah! Don't get me wrong, I wanted to marry the Idiot. But marriage is a scary thing. It's forever."

"That's a long time," muttered Kara.

"You don't have to tell me!" laughed Lois. "I've got two dogs and a monster we call our daughter to prove it!"

Kara giggled, "Krypto takes care of himself and Jo'an is not a monster, Lois."

"Obviously you've never dealt with the Kid before she has her breakfast. She's just like Smallville. An empty stomach? She's a grouch. Full stomach? She's all smiles and laughs, which was cute at first, but once she learned to smirk, it was all downhill from there," grumbled Lois.

"But you wouldn't change a thing, right?"

Lois looked to check if the coast was clear, "No...but don't tell _them_ that. _They_ think they run this place. Stupid Smallville with his ridiculously well timed kisses and the Kid? God. She just says something with your cousin's big stupid adorable eyes and I just _swoon_ away. Lanes don't swoon, Kara."

Kara let out a hearty laugh and Lois seemed to be having an internal discussion about her idiot and her monster.

"So...what changed?"

"Huh?"

"What changed? You said you were a wreck until you got to the church."

Lois grinned something fierce. "What else? Mrs. K."

Kara smiled. Even though she wasn't a real Kent, Martha Kent has always been warm to her and accept her into the family. "What did she say?"

"Well, she told me that no matter what issues we want to dance around, Clark loved me. I had just found out that Clark was the Blur, and I didn't really know how I fit into his life. I felt like I was going to hold him back," Lois explained.

"Lois, you don't hold Kal-El back. You've never held him back."

The brunette smiled at the blonde, "I know that _now_. And Mrs. K asked me one question that made it all so simple."

"What was it?"

Lois smiled for a few moments before answering. "She asked me if I could stand going to bed every day for the rest of my life without him. And when I thought about it, I can't. I can't even go an hour without that plaid-addicted farmboy whining about something!"

Kara let out a laugh, "Lois, you realize that you're wearing plaid right-"

"Hey! It's Smallville's plaid...I'm just borrowing it for a little bit."

"Why didn't you have your own shirt?"

Lois froze and blushed.

Kara giggled, "Even after all this time, you still can't keep your hands off each other, can you?"

"You know what, I'm playing Shrink for you right now. Focus! Do you think you can go the rest of your life without sleeping beside Bart? Do you think you can go the rest of your life without listening to him chew on whatever he's stuffing his face with at that particular moment? Whining about tacos and pizza?"

Kara looked away for a few moments before turning back with a radiant smile, "No.

"Good. Now let's get your butt back inside before you get a cold, we've got a wedding to attend tomorrow!"

Kara frowned and smiled, "Lois, you know I can't get a cold right?"

"Oh geeze, you sound like Smallville. 'I can't get a cold, Lois', blah, blah, blah. That's what he always says, but you know what? Did I ever tell you about the time with the damn barn door?" Kara shook her head. "This close! This close, Kara! He almost killed me with it!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Before you ask, there will be a chapter that covers the pre-wedding jitters that Lois suffered and we will see her little remedy with Martha Kent! And I really want to write a scene between Martha and Kara now! hahaha. I love spin-off potentials!

Anyways, I'm really sorry about being way off schedule these last two days. I don't know what's been going on with the site, I posted the 'Washington, DC' chapter around the normal time and I thought it was weird that I hadn't gotten any reviews or anything (damn that ego! haha) so I checked back on the site and it didn't show up for some reason, so I tried posting it again. Still nothing. And then I was locked out, and was locked out until just now. Not sure what was going on!

But now we're back to normal, and hopefully you guys are still hanging in there. I know it's been crazy. Anyways, let me know what you thought about this one and I'll be posting the next chapter in a few hours! Shoot me a review! Sorry about the wait!

**Next Up:** _Queen Tower._


	115. Queen Tower

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, why do I get the feeling I'm going to be kidnapped in my sleep? hahaha. And yes, there has been an odd transition of Clark wearing a lot less plaid and Lois wearing a lot more plaid. Women's clothing plaid. Quite interesting...haha...might we just have come up with a new chapter? hahaha.

**_meg_** - 50 seems like ages ago, doesn't it? haha. I doubt it'll end at 150 too, hahaha. Sometimes I think that as long as you guys keep reviewing, I think I'm going to be at it because I just love hearing what you guys think. I love to write and having people read it and respond, that's just too awesome to pass up, haha. It's become my little drug, hahaha. And yes! I take the challenge to write an Ella Lane chapter! haha. I can't turn down a double dog dare!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #115, Queen Tower

**Author's Note:** This one takes place right after '_Carter_' and right before '_Hawkman_'. Hope you guys like it!

* * *

"He better not screw this up, or I'm going to kill him," she muttered, trying to be quiet as Jo'an slept in the backseat.

Clark gave her a look, "And if he doesn't?"

"Then I'll kiss him." Clark frowned, Lois noticed. "Uh, I mean, them. I'll kiss them," she corrected nervously.

He let out a dramatic sigh.

"I promise I'll explain everything about the whole...Carter...Kiss...thing when we get home, ok?" she asked. She looked beyond nervous now.

Truth be told, Clark wasn't worried about it. In fact, he thought the whole situation was funny. He knew Lois would never cheat on him, and he seriously doubted Carter would do the same to Shayera. He just kind of liked seeing Lois squirm. It didn't happen often, but when it did...it was awesome.

"Ok, dear."

At Queen Tower, things were tense. Ollie leaned across the railing. Chloe sat on the couch.

Both were engaging in an epic battle of _who-is-going-to-talk-first._

Chloe felt a bit of panic creep into her thoughts. '_Maybe Ollie isn't ready to have kids...maybe he doesn't want to have kids with me...Sure, we're in a great place right now. And I feel like we've found each other all over again. But...maybe I'm thinking too much about who we were and not who we are now. We have only been back together for a little while. Well, a little while in comparison to how long we were together before..._'

On his end, he was having a completely different thought process. '_Sure, I'm good with Jo'an...way better than Bruce, by the way...Focus, Ollie...What if she didn't tell me because she thinks I won't be a good dad? That I'm too busy being Green Arrow to settle down? Holy crap. I'm having a kid. I'm having a freaking kid! Oh man, he...or she...is going to awesome. And woah, Jo'an is going to have a little niece or nephew. I can totally start a team of bad asses. We can have an Arrow-Car and an Arrow-Cave and oh! I'm so going to buy that mini compound bow I saw in Archery Magaz-_'

"Ollie?"

He looked up in surprise, "Swa?"

"Swa?"

"I meant..._what_...not...whatever _that_ was...," he chuckled.

Chloe smiled. Oliver didn't seem upset. "Don't you think that we should...you know...talk? About this?"

He frowned at her in confusion. She started to chuckle, "You know...this!" She waved her hand over her stomach.

"Oh!" he blurted. "Of course. Of course I want to talk about...you know..._that_."

And yet, another moment of awkward silence fell over them as they nervously shifted while they waited for the other to speak.

"So-"

"So-"

Chloe laughed, "You go ahead."

"No, no, you go. It's...you're the one...you know...carrying the baby."

She frowned, "Oliver, it's not...I'm not even showing yet."

"Showing what?"

"The baby."

"Oh."

And yet again, another moment of awkward silence fell over them.

"So-"

"So-"

"Oh my god, just say something Ollie!" laughed Chloe.

Oliver nodded nervously, "Uh...so uh...how do you feel about...you know..."

"The baby?"

He let out a laugh, "Yeah...the baby."

Chloe sighed, "Honestly? I'm kind of nervous about the whole thing."

He hung his head a little bit, '_She doesn't think I'd be a good father._'

"I mean, I know that this isn't exactly what you had planned for-"

"Wait, what?"

Chloe shook her head, "I didn't mean-"

"You think that I don't want a kid?"

She frowned, "You do?"

"Hell yeah!"

Chloe smiled, "Really?"

Oliver started to grin, "Chloe...of course I do. I can't wait to be a dad. Can you imagine how awesome that's going to be?"

She broke out into a smile, "You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that."

"Chloe, think about all of the toys we get to buy."

She laughed, "Of course. You and your toys."

Oliver grinned and then smiled sadly, "I was worried that you didn't think I'd be a good father."

Chloe saw the sad look on his face and wanted to cry. She rushed around the banister and gave him a hug before pulling back to look him in the face.

"Oliver, of course you're going to be a good father. You're practically a kid yourself."

"Hey now, I'm more mature than Bruce is."

Chloe rolled her eyes, "Yeah, mature...that's just the word I was thinking."

"Oh! Let's go to the toy store!"

"Oliver, we have plenty of time before we need to buy toys for the baby."

He froze, "Uh...right...toys for the baby."

She rolled her eyes and laughed at him, '_What am I going to do with this man?_' She smiled softly for a few moments, '_Start a family with him_.'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Haha, what did you guys think? It probably lacked a bit on substance, but I just wasn't sure how to write it without it coming off as they big ole sappy piece, so I just went with the humor angle and let whatever happened happen. I hope it worked, even though I know that not everyone likes the Chlollie relationship, I did promise that I would wrap up that storyline when I wrote '_Carter_' ages ago. So here it is! haha.

Obviously, this chapter leads into the chapter where Lois and Clark talk about the kiss (_Hawkman_). And assuming you've read it, you know that he's not actually mad and that he just wants to make Lois squirm a bit. It's pretty light and funny, it's also a flashback to '_Shield_'.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, but I think that it will feature Jo'an per request! haha.


	116. Jo'an's Bedroom

**Review Comments:**

_**Ashley**_ - Haha, it's like you peeked into my Document Manager! hahaha. Baby Jo'an is coming up soon.

**_s01itaire90_** - I'm glad that you liked Kara and Bart together, I'm not really sure how folks feel about that pairing, haha. It was really just something that I came up with in a spur of the moment situation, and I didn't really hear anything negative, so I kept at it, haha. Nope, I didn't take a weekend off, haha. I would let you guys know before I did something like that. It was just a problem with the site. I'm glad that you liked it though! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I absolutely agree about Lois and Martha. They're so different, and yet, they work so well together! I really hope that we see more Kara and Lois when she comes back before the end. Their scene in '_Supergirl_' was so perfect to me. It was great. And yeah, we'll have more Lois/Martha and Lois/Kara ahead just because I feel like we don't have enough of that! haha. Suffer through it! haha.

That was just the continuation of the scene that I promised when I had that reveal in 'Carter'! haha. I'll give you some Dollie chapters ahead, haha. I promise! I have to ask you though, Ollie and Dinah aren't together anymore, haha. What does that mean for Oliver's love life? haha. I know you're just busting my chops, haha, you haven't bailed on me yet after all the Chlollie that we've seen over the last 116 chapters, haha.

**_sasslady_** - I try and avoid being too mushy because real life isn't mushy like that, haha. I've never had that moment where the Enya kicked on and there were all these meaningful glances and declarations of love, haha. I try and keep things light and humorous. So, I'm glad to hear that, haha. The Chloe/Oliver relationship vs. Dinah/Oliver relationship is a nightmare for me because I'm trying to walk both lines of the comics and the show, and there is no middle ground there!

That's why I've tried to have a period where Oliver is with Chloe and a period where Oliver is with Dinah. I was going to have him just end up with Dinah, but then they broke up in the comics, and I was suddenly going, "Well...I guess he can get back together with Chloe now." haha.

Oh, and I did, it was "_Hawkman_", haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Hahaha, I almost want to write a chapter like that so that I can have Bruce tear Oliver to pieces, haha!

**_alexindigo_** - Yeah, it was crazy! Katlynne termed it "Bara", so I think I'm going to go with that, haha. I'm glad that you liked it! haha. I wanted to have Lois do her "I'm going to pretend that they aren't important to me even though nothing is more important than my Smallville and my Baby" thing, haha. I'm glad that Lois and Clark seem to have figured things out. There is plenty of drama that can be had, but it doesn't have to be break-up type drama. That's one of the things that I love about Chuck and Sarah being together on _Chuck_ now. Plenty of fun and story without being that break-up type drama.

I'm literally glowing with anticipation to see Lois be able to _whoosh_ all on her own now, hahaha. And don't drool on your phone! haha. These damn things are so easy to break, haha. I don't want you to not be able to read and comment! haha.

Bruce and Oliver's bromance is one of my favorite things to write! And yeah, I think that Oliver would be a great dad. He's such a goof. The break-up takes way back before Lois and Clark get married, and then that's when he dates Dinah until he gets back together with Chloe at Jo'an's birthday party. I know that's it's confusing, haha, I have a whole long word document that keeps all this stuff straight, haha.

I can't imagine that there won't be Lex Luthor. I don't think you could do Superman without Lex Luthor. Even if he isn't the main villain, he still needs to be around in some aspect. At least, that's how I would do it, haha. He can be that was a villain, will be again at some point character.

_**Bella Swan is Max Ride's Bitch**_ - Given your name, I just imagine you as this bad ass, haha. And then you go "awww, I love Chlollie, they are so cute" and I'm thrown, haha. I'm glad that you liked it though! hahaha.

_**Katlynne**_ - She's back! haha. Your long reviews were missed, haha. You can't die May 13th because these guys are going to have me writing for way longer than that, haha. I'm going to need you to be here to review my chapters! haha. But yes, it's going to be a great event!

He had to think something! haha. If you walked in on that insanity, you wouldn't think, "She must have been exposed to kryptonite," haha. And I'm glad that you liked the banter in 'Superman', haha. I'm not even going to lie, I was pretty happy with the banter in that one, haha. I get nervous sometimes writing any of those non-Smallville characters or any of them who weren't on there a lot like Dinah or Bart or even Carter, but then I think, "every writer brings something new to a character, just keep it in the ballpark and you'll be cool."

Of course, there are always those who can't handle anything but a carbon copy of the character they think is the right version, but screw them, haha. You're an awesome writer. I'm sure you'd do a great job with Dinah or anyone else you want to write, haha.

No review for 109? haha. I thought that one would be right down you alley! hahaha. I can't help it! I want you to kepe writing! haha. Either 'Nemesis' or some other new story, haha. I look forward to hearing the list! haha. I'm going to have everyone say what their favorite chapter was for the big finale, haha, stop throwing things! haha, it has to end sometime! And yeah, Lois won't admit it, but she needed Clark to be happy. Even then, haha. I agree 100% about Lane Smith and I'm really uncertain about who I want to play him in Man of Steel. Alec Baldwin comes to mind, but he's far from perfect.

I had to steal that line from Alternate Universe Lois Lane, "How can a man with X-Ray Vision be so blind?" I adore that line from '_Apocalypse_'. I thought it was far too perfect to not write Lois coming to Martha, haha. And nope, Lois is never going to let it go, haha. She's going to give him trouble forever and ever, haha. I've been inspired by what a goof he was during '_Isis_' with Clark and Tess, haha. I want more nerdy, goofy Oliver Queen, haha. He's so funny in the comics! I totally would have bought it! haha. My little sister drew a Superman picture for her Art Class and I have it hanging on my wall at my apartment, haha.

Gunna be honest. It's not popular with the ladies, hahahaha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I'm sorry if I've distracted you! But forgive me for not being terribly sorry, haha. I feel proud now, haha. Yes, I am a guy, haha. I wasn't under the impression that was unusual, but if you say so, haha. I try and keep it light and fun because like you said, it's pretty rare to have someone actually blurt out a declaration of love like that and not every conversation even needs to have that going on.

I'm glad that you liked the chapter with Jo'an and Jonathan, and hopefully I can live up to expectations with the Valentines Day chapter, haha.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! haha. All of it, I suppose, haha. I love writing Oliver and Bruce, and getting to write Martha and Lois is one of the biggest perks of writing Smallville FanFiction because we don't nearly get enough of them on the show!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #116, Jo'an's Bedroom

**Author's Note: **It took forever to post it, but here is the sequel to '_the Kitchen_', '_Thanksgiving_' was the prequel. Enjoy!

* * *

"_JUNIOR! DO YOU HAVE MY CUP AGAIN!_"

Even though she knew what the outcome would be when her grandfather gave her the cup, she had the nerve to look surprised. "Uh oh."

Stomp. Stomp. Stomp. _SWING_. The door came flying open. Both the General and Jo'an froze in fear. Lois' hair was a mess, sticking out at odd angles, no doubt from running her hands through it as she tore apart the kitchen in search of her favorite cup.

"Uh, I think I hear Lucy calling me," muttered the General, making his exit.

Lois grabbed the front of his jacket before he could leave, "I know it was you, Dad."

Gulp.

Ever since she had Jo'an, Lois had been much more willing to tell her father _exactly _how she felt. Having a child as unruly as Jo'an had shown her that her own father had been blessed to have two children who were as well behaved as Lois and Lucy were. You know, at _this_ age.

The General flinched, but pushed past Lois into the hallway and quickly down the stairs.

Now it was just the Mother and the Daughter. Lois towered over the cross-legged Jo'an, who was still holding her mother's favorite Elmer Fudd cup, filled with her mother's favorite Rocky Road ice cream. The child had the nerve to try and look innocent, "Hi Mom."

Lois' gaze narrowed. "Don't you dare give me those puppy dog eyes, Kent."

"Lane-Kent," she reminded with a smirk.

"Cute. You know why I'm here."

Jo'an made the most innocent face that Lois had ever seen, "What do you mean, Mommy?"

Oh, the kid was good. Real good. But there wasn't a play in the book that Lois hadn't already used in her day.

"I mean, you're using..._my_...cup. To eat..._my_...ice cream."

Jo'an made a face, "But the food in the fridge is community food." Lois opened her mouth to reply, but Jo'an beat her to it. "That's what you told Dad when Grandma sent his favorite cherry cobbler for his birthday and you ate it all, isn't it? _Fridge Food is Community Food, Smallville_," she recited word-for-word.

Lois paled. '_Ok...maybe the kid is better than I gave her credit for..._'

Then Lois narrowed her eyes and smirked, "That goes for the food in the fridge, not for the food in the freezer, Junior. So ha!"

A confident smirk formed on her daughter's face. Lois was certain that Clark could hear her gulp all the way downstairs.

"That's what Daddy said when he ate your the last of your fudge last Christmas, and you said the freezer is attached to the fridge, so it's all one commun-"

"You know what!" shouted Lois, throwing her hands into the air wildly, "That is still _my_ cup! How are you going to explain your way out of that?"

For the first time since Lois came up stairs, Jo'an looked worried. Then she smirked, "I don't see your name on it, Mom."

Lois felt her jaw drop. "I don't _need_ to have my name on it!"

"They say at school that if you don't want someone to take your stuff, you should write your name on it."

"I don't care what they say at your school, that's my cup!"

"You don't care what my school says?"

"No!"

Jo'an felt her smirk grow, "Then I guess that means I don't need to do homework anymore."

"What?"

"My teachers tell me to do my homework. If you don't care what they say, then I don't have to do it anymore!"

Clark listened as he heard Lois groan, a smile growing on his face, "I give Lois five minutes. If she doesn't win by then, she never will."

"Clark, I love my daughter very much. Both of them. But my granddaughter is on a whole other level," chuckled the General. "I have never seen a little girl as smart as my little Jo-Bear. You've done a wonderful job raising her, Clark. I'm very impressed."

As his cheeks began to redden, Clark grinned like a little boy, "Thanks, Sir."

The General clapped him on the shoulder, "Call me Sam, Son."

"Uh...Mr. uh...General...sir?"

The two turned to see Jimmy Olsen standing in the kitchen entry way, nervously swallowing and sweating.

"'Can I...uh...Can I talk to you about something...sir..."

The General gave the poor boy a steely stare that made Jimmy quiver in fear. He nodded, so Jimmy turned towards the back door with a sigh of relief. The General looked back to Clark and smiled, "I guess Clark Kent isn't the only man brave enough to suffer the wrath of a Lane."

Clark laughed as the General got up from his seat, before he got too far, Clark called out to him.

"Hey Sam?" The General looked back. "He already has Lucy looking to kill him, take it easy on the kid?"

The General smiled, "I hope you don't mean kiss him, Clark. I know about your little game with my _other_ daughter."

Clark gulped as the General walked out the back door to meet up with Jimmy.

'_I really have to teach that kid how to keep a secret,_' he pondered as he wiped some sweat from his brow.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I wanted to have Jo'an drive Lois crazy, haha, hopefully it met expectations! haha. It only took, what? A hundred and so chapter to get to it? haha. Also, as I've been doing lately, this sets up a spinoff chapter where Jimmy will ask the General if he can have Lucy's hand in marriage, which of course leads into the '_Newsroom_' chapter where Jimmy finally proposes to Lucy.

Well, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm not really sure, haha. I'm thinking that it will be '_the Inquisitor_'.


	117. Inquisitor

**Review Comments:**

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Lol, I can imagine fighting a four year old would be difficult. I know how my cousins were when they were four year old!

I'm glad that you liked the Martha/Lois angle! haha. I really thought she needed to talk to someone about it all. Especially someone that wasn't a total stranger, no offense Carter! haha. I absolutely love Kara/Lois and I think they have a ton of potential, haha. I can't wait to write them more! I think I'll have to write a chapter where Chloe and Oliver meet up with the Kents and Lois welcomes him into the family Godfather style, haha.

Nervous Jimmy is adorable, isn't it? haha. I can't wait to write the post-engagement chapter, haha. I think you guys will really like it! haha. And yeah, I'm thinking that Clark is going to have to protect poor Jimmy from Lois. She is very protective of her baby sister, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I don't know, haha, Jo'an does have kryptonian intuition on her side, haha. And yeah, that line from Lois was from the Godfather, hahaha. I don't know why, but it just seemed like the perfect line as the General tries to shuffle out of harms way, haha.

Yes, the timeline is more or less intact! haha. And somehow, 117 chapters later, it's all one timeline! haha. Though as the episodes air, it's going to go more and more off-track from the Smallville timeline and start to become more and more AU. At least some of the chapters. And yes, Chuck and Sarah are finally together! And honestly, the writing is still pretty good. It's not as plucky as the first two seasons, but it's still pretty good. And relationship Charah is so bad ass! hahaha. They've done a great job of making it funny and fresh, not letting their relationship weigh it down.

Morgan and Captain Awesome have never been better though! haha. Morgan has just gotten more awesome with each season! And well, Adam Baldwin is a god in my eyes, haha. From Chuck to Firefly, the guy is absolute win in anything he does!

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I'm glad to be of service, hahaha. I think that with the Lanes, food _has_ to come up! haha. I don't know how Lois stays in such great shape when she always seems to be eating this or that, haha. Jimmy will live! haha. Don't worry!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois, foreshadowing of Bruce/Vicki

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #117, the Metropolis Inquisitor

**Author's Note:** Had an idea...ran with it...liked it...hope you guys do to! Enjoy!

* * *

"Then what happened?"

Lois shrugged, "I ended up sucking face with the _real_ Green Arrow with Ollie watching right there!"

Vicki Vale laughed and shook her head, "How did Oliver react?"

"Surprisingly. He didn't seem to care as much as I thought he would. He just mutters about how he thinks the Green Arrow has a thing for me?"

Vicki frowned, "That's weird."

"Yeah, I think he just means that the Green Arrow flashes his face a lot around me."

"Hmmm. Well?" Lois gave her a 'well, what?' look. "How was it?"

If Vicki didn't know any better, she would have thought that Lois Lane had just blushed.

"It was uh...it was pretty good."

"Pretty good? Come on, Lo. You gotta do better than that!"

Lois rolled her eyes, "You're awful, you know that?" Vicki gave her a cheeky grin. "Fine! It was amazing! It was perfect! Is that what you wanted to hear? It was unlike anything I'd ever experienced. It was like it wasn't a first kiss, but a kiss you had with someone...someone you had loved for years..."

"Wow."

Lois looked up to see Vicki smirking, "What?"

"Looks like this Green Arrow character left quite the impression on our star reporter."

Another eye roll came to try and divert attention from the blush creeping up in her cheeks, "You sound just like, Smallville."

"Oh? What's our favorite farmboy saying this time?" Vicki asked with a knowing smirk.

"Well, if you must know...I told him and Chloe how good the kiss was, and now he's just walking around the farm giving me hell over it."

Vicki laughed, "I really have to meet this boy someday. What's he been saying?"

Lois gave an annoyed sigh at the thought, "Oh you know, stuff like...like when he's making a sandwich and I tell him to make me one, he'll say something like, 'Ok, Lois, but I probably can't make a sandwich as well as the Green Arrow can kiss,'" she recited in a goofy voice.

Vicki snickered to her self. "He is such a naughty boy."

Lois blew a strand of hair out of her eye line, "I don't know what's with him lately. He certainly has a skip in his step."

She started to bite on a the tip of her pen as she thought about it. She had been trying to avoid biting her nails since Clark had teased her about it the other day. Not that she cared what Clark thought. Really. She didn't. '_Ok, fine, maybe I care just a little bit._'

"So when you going to set me up with him?"

Lois looked up, pen in mouth, "With who?"

Vicki rolled her eyes, "Smallville! You know, that guy you're always going on about? The hunky farmboy? The one who drives you crazy?"

Pen. Dropped.

"Wha...why...why would you wanna do that?"

Vicki frowned, "Why wouldn't I? Some muscle covered, farm tanned, stud muffin from hicktown? Momma like."

Lois felt her eyes bug out of her head, "But...I'm always talking about how annoying he is."

"And how big his muscles are," she quipped with a smirk.

"I didn't...say..._that..._exactly."

Vicki looked at her with a confused expression, "You said that it's distracting how tight his shirts are."

"So?"

"Why are his shirts so tight, Lois?"

Lois mumbled something.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Fine! His muscles are big! But that's no reason to date somebody!"

Vicki recoiled in surprise, "And what is? His _personality_?"

"That! And his...his is so...so...plain! And, and, and...plain!"

"If you don't want me to go out with him, I won't..."

Lois felt her jaw drop open, "I don't care if you go out with him!"

"Then I will."

"You know what? He's like...super busy...right now. So, it might be hard for me to set that up..."

Realization set in with Vicki, "I thought you said all he does all day is chuck bales of hay?"

"Yeah...I did...but uh...there's a lot of it. Lots of hay. Lots, lots, lots. Yep."

"Well, isn't that just unfortunate?"

Lois nodded, "Uh huh. _Real_ unfortunate."

"Well, I guess it's not a total loss. Maybe I'll take that job at Gotham Gazette and there's the hunky Bruce Wayne to feast upon."

Lois smirked, "Billionaire Playboy seems more your speed anyways, Vic."

"And small town Farmboy seems more your speed, Lo."

"What? I spend most of my time trying to resist the urge to kill the King of Plaid!"

Vicki let out a laugh as she walked away. "And I bet you spent the rest of the time resisting the urge to kiss him."

Before Lois could respond, the office door swished back to a close and Vicki was gone. Lois sat down with a huff. She eyed the picture of her, Chloe, and Clark at Crater Lake last year. Picking up the frame, she gave a look over Clark's shirtless torso.

'_It probably wouldn't be all that...what the hell am I thinking? It's Smallville! Good god, I'm losing my mind!_'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did it suffice? haha. I had planned for a while to write a bit with Vicki Vale working with Lois Lane at the Inquisitor before they went off to their future employers. Of course, that was way back when I was going to have Bruce end up with Vicki, haha, instead of our favorite Amazon. So, it was converted from "_Vicki Vale_" to "_the Inquisitor_", and hopefully it still works! haha.

Given the time frame in which Lois worked at the Inquisitor (Season 6), I took it as my chance to talk about '_Hydro_' as well, hahaha. I just love the idea of Clark being all chest puffed out after that kiss! haha. Anyways, let me know what you guys thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Either '_Green Lantern_' or '_Courtney Whitmore_'.


	118. Green Lantern

**Review Comments (Wow, everyone came out to comment for that one! hahaha):**

_**cathy03**_ - She's certainly something alright, hahaha. And yes, I think it's some sort of combination of kryptonian intuition and Lane charm (yes, they have some, hahaha), because she's in a league of her own, haha. Even the Gramps thinks so.

I'll take your word for it about Dollie, haha. Yes, I know about his _sons_, haha. Both Connor Hawke and Robert Queen. Though I haven't heard a peep about Robert Queen in ages. I've actually been thinking about introducing Connor at some point, I haven't decided how to yet though. Only time will tell if Ollie and Dinah get back together. And for the sake of the Hard Traveling Heroes, I hope they do, haha.

I don't know if I'd call it _clever_, haha. More like, "_What happened of interest during Season 6 between Lois and Clark that might get turned around on her here with Vicki?_" haha. Of course, that seemed like the best one to go with! hahaha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I can only imagine! haha. Yeah, the site was kind of wonky for a while there. I couldn't let her set-up Clark Kent! hahaha. No matter how much she wants to pretend otherwise, that boy is _her_ punching bag, haha. No touchy for anyone else, haha.

**_jade2nightwing_** - I have a chapter coming up where her friends from Met-U run into her with Clark, so maybe Vicki pops up too, haha.

_**s01itaire90**_ - You know that I can't let Jo'an lose! haha. She's a little mastermind! haha. And yeah, that whole exchange was inspired by like every "_I don't want you to date the person that I like_" moment I've ever seen! haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I can't remember where, but I remember Vicki Vale working for the Daily Planet and having come to Gotham to interview Batman in some story or in some movie or TV show, so that kind of grew out of that. But I figured, meh, let's have the two infamous reporters start at the Inquisitor just for the fun of it, haha. I love it when characters intersect before the main story. Like how the Guardians of the Universe that give the Green Lanterns their rings were actually the ones that helped protect and guide baby Kal-El to Earth in the very beginning. Those bits are pure gold to me! haha.

I kind of imagined them as rivals/buddies, haha. Both with big dreams of working elsewhere, but doing time before they can get there. Lois with her eye on the Daily Planet, Vicki with her eye on the Gotham Gazette, it just seemed to fit, haha. I knew I wanted to do that forever ago, if you go back to the 'Batman' chapter I wrote, Vicki actually told Bruce that she worked with Lois at the Inquisitor! haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, it's not like I'm planning on ending anytime soon! haha.

_**Meg**_ - I really need to write a chapter showing Clark like that, haha. I think that's just adorable, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I've never had someone call me a Goose before, haha. I forgot that you reviewed it when it came out! hahaha. Well, I fully expect to read all four of those stories someday! haha. As hard as you guys are on me! haha. It's your turn! hahaha.

I'm not real high on Alec Baldwin's voice either! haha. Personally I like the slimmed down John Goodman, he's got the bark for it, but I keep hearing Alec Baldwin and it's starting to grow on me if he doesn't it right. If you want lots of Ollie, you're going to get him in this one! haha. I'm glad that you like the Monster bit, haha. She loves that little girl more than anything, but she's can't act like it! hahaha. I'm writing an ending to that, btw, haha. I already know exactly how I want it to end, and I can't _not_ write it after I started to imagine it! hahaha.

I think I'm going to add that talk to my talk about Crimson chapter, haha. It should prove to be a good laugh! hahaha. And yeah right, I know that you meant you're going to murder me! You're all going to murder me if I ever stop! haha. I'm scared to close my eyes at night! Ninjas! hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I love pre-Clois Clois as well! hahaha. Nothing makes me happier than writing "hints of Clois" in the Pairing section, haha. I think that even more than his grin when Lois said it, was the grin he had after they kissed that made me dance with joy! hahaha. And I'll just add one last reason to get back into_Chuck_ again: Morgan...is a...wait for it...it's going to be awesome...SPY! hahahahahaha. And buddies with Casey! hahahahahaha.

And now I'm done, hahaha.

**_Ina100years_** - I'm glad that you like them! haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_A,sky_** - Haha, that's always great to hear! haha. I want every new chapter to be your new favorite! hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Clois, mentions of Bara, hints of Hal/Tess

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #118, Green Lantern

**Author's Note: **Sooooo, this one takes place pre-'_Tess_' and pre-'_Hal_'. It came out surprisingly long, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Oliver tore down the alleyway, chasing after a thug that had just robbed a pawn shop around the corner.

"Flash! Get your scarlet butt down here!" he shouted into his comm-unit.

He had almost caught up with the criminal when a wall of green sprung up out of now where. With a thud, Oliver hit it and fell to the ground.

"Woah, you alright?"

Oliver looked up to see two...maybe three...no, definitely four Bart Allen's standing over him. "What the..."

"Stand down."

Oliver looked up and saw a man float down to the ground. The man was wearing some kind of awful get-up, not that the color looked bad to Ollie. The man turned and threw up a similar wall in front of the thug, who thought he had caught a break. The thug was promptly knocked out.

"Buddy?"

Bart looked down, "What's up?"

"Did you just see some guy use a Ring Pop to stop our guy?"

Looking up at the man with a concerned look, Bart could only nod.

"That's what I thought."

Oliver climbed to his feet with the help of his partner, only to have the man hold up a hand at him. "Alright, I think we can take it from here."

"I don't think so," the man replied.

"Look, I'm -"

"I know who you are, Green Arrow. I've heard a lot about your antics."

Oliver grinned and gave Bart a head flick, "He's heard of me."

"What about me?" asked Bart. The man frowned. "You know...the Scarlet Speedster? Impulse? The Flash? Nothing?" The man shook his head. "Dammit."

"Anyways, that's uh...that's our bad guy right there...so if you can go...play in a jewelry store or something? That'd be-"

The man lunged forward with his fist and a green light burst across the alley. When Bart lowered his arms, he saw Oliver trapped in what looked like a box of green light. He knocked on the case of light, getting a glassy _tink_ sound in response. Bart looked back to the man.

"It was the only way that I could think of to make your friend shut up."

Oliver, trapped in a the green encasement, muttered something indistinguishable to Bart, "'t 'm."

Bart frowned and whispered, "What?"

Oliver rolled his eyes, "'et 'm!"

Bart shook his head, "Dude, I can't tell what you're trying to say."

"I think he's trying to say 'get him'," explained the man.

The Speedster started to nod his head, "Ooooooh." Bart looked nervously between Oliver and the man before whispering to Oliver, "I think he knows..."

Oliver made a squeak sound that indicated he still wanted Bart to "get him."

The man noticed the exchange, and as Bart made to speed towards him, he shot Oliver back down the alley and used his ring to create green ice that sent Bart slipping and sliding to the ground. A _smush_ sound echoed loudly in Bart's ears as he quickly pulled off his backpack to look inside.

"Dude! Those were my tacos!" Bart hung his head as he scooped out some meat and cheese from his backpack.

Oliver climbed to his feet and raced to his partners aid. He tried to pat him on the back, but Bart waved him off. "Kara is going to kill me."

The Archer frowned, "Why?"

Bart looked like he was about to cry, "She loves Taco Night..."

Oliver snorted, "Are you sure it's not _you_ that loves Taco Night?" Bart looked up at him with an angry face, Oliver grimaced, "Sorry, Buddy."

"What is your deal? Can't you see that we're trying to apprehend a criminal here? Who the hell are you anyways?"

"I am Green Lantern."

Oliver let out a laugh, "Green Lantern? Between the ring and your name, shouldn't you be running an antique shop somewhere?"

Green Lantern glared at him, "You are one to talk, Green Arrow. You sound like a children's toy."

"Dude! Burn!" laughed Bart.

"Shut up, he didn't even know who you are."

"But at least I'm not a kid's toy."

"Your power is running _really_ fast. That's as kiddie as it gets!"

"At least I have a power!"

"Gentlemen!"

The two looked back at Green Lantern, who seemed to be annoyed with them. "What?" they shouted in unison.

"I believe I was in the process of arresting the two of you."

Oliver sighed dramatically, "For what? That guy just robbed a pawn shop over off 68th! _We_...were arresting him!"

"I can't allow you to take the law into your own hands, Green Arrow. The police should deal with him."

"Like I was going to inflict my own brand of justice on him? Ha! As if Boyscout would allow that! We were going to string him up _for_ the police!"

Green Lantern frowned, "Boyscout?"

"Yeah, Boyscout!"

Bart nudged Oliver, "He doesn't know who Boyscout is."

"Superman! Ok? Super-_freaking_-man. Got it?"

"You two run with Superman?"

Oliver turned to Bart with an eyeroll, "Because that makes this all ok?" He turned back to Green Lantern. "Yes! We _run_ with Superman, whatever the hell that's supposed to mean. In fact, I'd like to take credit for being the one that made him into Superman."

"Dude, that was _so_ Lois."

"No, it wasn't. He wasn't even _with_ Lois when I encouraged him to become the Blur."

"Arrow, come on. He wasn't the Blur until he started to work with her."

"I was the one that told him he needed to buck up and start using his powers for the good of the world!"

"Dude, Boyscout has said a dozen times that it's her love that makes him able to fly."

"Oh yeah? You ever think that maybe he flew away because she was trying to kill him?"

"Guys!"

Once again, Bart and Oliver turned to look at the Green Lantern in annoyance. "What?"

"Can we continue this conversation after we drop off this criminal at the nearest police station?"

After dropping off the criminal, the trio got to talking. Oliver explained that he and Bart were part of a team of super-heroes. A team that the Green Lantern seemed keen on meeting. Revealing himself to be Hal Jordan, they ventured to Watchtower to meet the rest of the gang. As always, they were very happy to have another member join the Justice League. Especially one with Hal's talents.

Hal was laughing at Bruce Wayne's story about Oliver's famous chili when something caught his eye.

"Woah, who's that?"

Oliver looked back to see a group of people talking, "Who?" Tracing Hal's gaze to a beautiful red head in the back, Oliver smirked. "The girl?"

Hal nodded without a word.

"That...is Tess Mercer."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that for the Green Lantern's introduction? haha. I was standing in the shop at work the other day, and I was fiddling with this little green ring that we had laying on the table, and I just put it on and started goofing around. And at some point, I just imagined all the things you could do with the power ring. And I just got that idea for Ollie to be stuck and Bart to not be able to hear him, haha. And it became this! haha.

I hope that you guys liked it, haha. It's hard to bring these new characters in with a fun flair! And the best I could do for a Kill-Me-Kiss-Me moment was the "Boyscout has said a dozen times that it's her love that makes him able to fly." - "Oh yeah? You ever think that maybe he flew away because she was trying to kill him?" exchange, haha. Without either Lois or Clark in the chapter, it's hard to set up that theme, haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Kent Nelson_, but let's just say that his role is very small, and that it's Part 2 of a certain chapter you all were angry about! hahaha.


	119. Kent Nelson

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Lol, I don't think Hal would have faired well against both Oliver _and_ Bruce, haha.

**_sasslady_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it. I kind of had to wing it. I think that I might just have to write a chapter where Bart mentions that to Lois and she verbally kicks Ollie's ass, haha. I can just see how Bart and Clark would react! haha. Great idea! I originally had Hal and Tess together in each of the chapters for 'Tess' and 'Hal' and people seemed to like it, so I kept it, haha. It won't be a big deal like Bara or Jucy, but it's just another tie-in.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, I did benefit from spending a lot of time at A-1 Comics as a kid, haha, but if you really want to get more familiar with really any of the DC Comics characters then I would recommend checking out DC Wikia. There's a lot of great info on there on all the characters in all the universes (or Earth's depending on your preference). I find myself checking on there all the time for inspiration and/or little thrown-ins.

But yeah, if you look close enough, there are a million little tie-ins throughout the comics. It's one of the reasons that I really, really, really hope that they change their minds about Superman and Batman and the rest of the DC Universe living in the same world. I'm really sad that Zack Snyder says that his Superman movie won't have anything to do with Christopher Nolan's Batman movies, and neither will have to do with the Justice League movie.

In my mind, I'm having Hal find the ring after Superman appears and the Justice League is more or less public knowledge. So he knows who all the heroes are, but he's just recently become Green Lantern. At least that's the way I'm selling it, hahaha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm definitely going to call my friend from Minnesota now and ask her if she's ever called anyone a goose! hahaha. I'm not very thrilled about the movie either, especially since it's starting to sound like a remake of Superman II. Changing Krypton? Bad move Zack Snyder. Who are you thinking of for the role of Perry White? I agree with you, Lane Smith was _perfect_. I don't know if anyone will come close to that.

That's exactly what I was thinking! hahaha. Oliver/Chandler as that sarcastic guy and Bart/Joey as that borderline stupid guy! hahaha. I can almost see Clark as that Ross type character because Lois is very Rachel-esque, hahaha. Oh man, haha. I hope that I didn't get you into any trouble with your chem teacher! hahaha. But I have to admit, it makes me happy to hear that you like it so much, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad that you could still like it even if it didn't feature Lois or Clark! I think that Bart really opens up the door for that silly comedy and of course, Oliver is the king of well timed sarcasm, haha. Lois met Hal for the first time in 'Tess', but I'd be glad to write another chapter featuring Hal.

Yep! Morgan is a spy! I don't know if Casey wants to be around Morgan, but they are...wait for it...partners! hahaha. I will admit, I'm a couple chapters behind and I'll have to catch up, but when I left off, it was just getting into the thick of it! hahaha. He still lusts after Ellie, even though she is know Ellie Woodcomb, haha. I haven't watched the clip yet, but I did see the screen captures and the interview with Kelly Saunders. I'm super pumped!

**_lmdv07_** - Awww, that was so sweet of you to say! Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Lexana, mentions of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #119, Kent Nelson

**Author's Note:** First bit is from '_Absolute Justice_', the rest is the sequel to '_Mongul_', fair warning...it's really long, hahaha.

**Lex Knowing/Not Knowing Note:** I got a reminder from one of our readers that I already had Lex knowing in '_Evil Lex_'...so we're going to go ahead and have him know since it would be out of the timeline to have him not remember, sorry guys! haha. Even I forgot! haha. Hopefully you still like it!

* * *

"When you saw my fate...what did you see?"

Dr. Fate hesitated. "You will lead this generation...as Hawkman once led ours."

Clark felt a surge of pride flow through him. "You sound like a group I met from the future. They hinted at my destiny, but they were as vague as you are."

"Then let me be more specific," offered Dr. Fate. "Although Lex Luthor is your ultimate opponent, you will triumph over him."

In a flash, Clark went from optimistic to feeling a cold pang in his gut.

"Lex? Lex is dead."

He didn't know if it was a statement or a question. And the way that Dr. Fate turned away, he was leaning towards the latter.

**2 Years Later...**

Lex Luthor sat at his desk. A smile playing across his face as he watched Lois Lane struggle with her restraints. Gunfire sounded in the hallway, and Lex's smile grew into a grin. Mongul most have told Clark where Lois was. Just as Lex hoped he would.

The steel door crunched like paper under Clark's grip. He stepped inside and threw it aside like it was nothing.

Lex smirked, "It's open."

"Where is she?"

"Who? Lois Lane? Oh, she's a little tied up at the moment," smirked Lex.

You could hear his knuckles pop as Clark balled his hands into fists. Anger was clearly etched across his features.

"Thousands of people are dying, Lex."

Lex laughed, "Millions! Once again, the press underestimates me, Clark!"

"No."

His eyebrows shot up as Lex's smirk faded, "No?"

Clark's steely glare strengthened. "You see, while you and your friends have done your best to create havoc. Me and mine have chosen to protect."

"I think that was my line, Clark," quipped Lex.

He ignored him and continued, "We've dealt with them. All of them. And now? Now, it's just you and me."

"As it should be."

"Where's Lois?"

Lex's smirk was back in full form, "When I got back...I promised myself one thing. You know what that was, Clark? I promised myself that I would put an end to Superman. I would put an end to you and your reign. You took-"

"No more," Clark demanded. "No more of your whining about what I've taken from you. No more playing the victim, Lex. You put millions of lives on the line today with your antics. You don't get to cry about being painted as the villain anymore. You drew that line in the sand when you joined Mongul."

Lex grinded his teeth in anger. He wasn't a fan of people cutting him off mid-speech.

"As far as _Lionel_..._Lana_...and your _spotlight_ go? How was it that you told me, Lex? I didn't steal anything from you...you lost it all on your own."

In a swift motion, Lex lunged at Clark. For a moment, Clark almost wanted to laugh at Lex's attempt. He was Superman. What was he going to do? But then he saw the confidence in Lex's eyes. And no matter what, Clark knew that Lex was no fool.

Lex raised a fist, and Clark prepared himself for whatever was coming. When the punch landed Clark found himself surprised, and yet he felt like he knew this was coming all along. He flew across the room and into the wall. The steel pipes bent and broke with the impact of Clark's body. Looking up at Lex, Clark saw green and purple arrow come into view as Lex unbuttoned his shirt slowly with a smirk.

"What do you think, Clark? Lana might have stolen Version 2 of Project Prometheus, but I still have Version 1." Lex revealed what could only be described as a battle suit. "It's a little more clunky and bulky than I'd like...but if it means killing you...I think I can suffer through it for now."

The suit began to unfold and build up. What appeared to be a thin suit quickly became a full on war suit. The metal glimmered green and purple, a bright light shined in the dead center of his chest. Clark stood up and brushed the dust off his suit, "You think your toy suit is going to be enough?"

Lex smirked, "Let's find out."

The two met each other, fists blazing, in the center of the LexCorp Chairman's office. They exchanged blows, neither willing to step back. The cold metal of Lex's fist beat across Clark's face as Clark delivered punches to Lex's mid-section. A spurt of blood filled Lex's mouth, while Clark's skin tore across his left cheek. Needing to make some sort of momentum change, Clark used his super-speed to pull back and deliver a heavy blow.

Lex flew back through the window as Clark fell to his knees, eyes squeezed shut in pain. His eyes shot open when they heard a low hum just outside of the window. Looking up, he saw Lex hovering outside the window with a smirk. "You didn't think that I was going to go out that easy, did you?"

In a flash, Lex had Clark pinned up against the wall. They continued to exchange blows, their blood mixing on the floor beneath them.

'_I have to end this...I have to find Lois,_' he thought. Staring at the light in the center of Lex's chest, Clark took a chance.

He punched as hard as he could to crunch the bright light with a crinkle. Lex looked down in surprise as the suit shut down on him with a quiet hum. He looked up at Clark to see his angry smirk. Before Lex could react, Clark then tore the suit apart at the center to leave Lex defenseless.

Clark picked Lex up by his neck, causing Lex to smile a sick grin. "Do it. Kill me. I'll never stop if you don't."

He tightened his grip, trying to fight back memories of choosing not to kill Doomsday. Trying not to remember what it cost him. _Jimmy_. Lex kept smiling, he wanted Clark to kill him. He wanted Clark to sink to his level. It took every bit of strength that Clark had to make the right choice.

Slamming Lex down onto the desk, causing the legs to buckle underneath, he turned Lex over with a grimace. Clark used a piece of pipe to make some makeshift handcuffs. Flipping Lex back over, Clark could see Lex's disappointment. Disappointment in that Clark didn't sink to his level.

With a snarl, Clark demanded, "Where is she?"

Lex shook his head to his right.

Clark looked at the safe and realized that he couldn't see behind it. '_Lead door_...' he figured. He threw Lex towards the front door, he landed with a thud as his head smacked against the ground. Clark hurried towards the safe. Gripping it, feeling the metal crinkle under his fingers like tissue paper, he could faintly hear Lois screaming something inside. It only hastened his efforts to rip the steel door off it's hinges.

It snapped off with a crunch, and suddenly, the door became very, very heavy. "There's kryptonite in here!"

Clark managed to get out from under the door as it fell. He looked over to see Lois chained to a chain in the middle of the room with gas slowly filling the room. The green glow shined off her face as she shouted through coughs, "Get the hell out of here! It's going to kill you! Get out!"

Lex laughed coldly as he began to pass out, "Now you get to watch her die, or die trying to save her..."

Turning back to see Lex unconscious, Clark gritted his teeth. It was just like Lex to put Clark in such a terrible position, but he knew that he had only one choice so he continued on. He stumbled his way to her, trying not to breath too much, gripping the chains around the chair.

"You have to get out of here," she pleaded with tears streaming down her cheeks. "I'll find a way out...you have to go..."

Clark ignored her and began to pull on the chains, '_Have to...save...Lois..._'

The chains refused to budge. The pain increased the longer he stayed in the room and the more his strength was sapped away. He knew he didn't have much time left. For either of them. Planting his feet on the legs of the chair bolted to the ground, he pulled with every bit of strength he had.

A lone link bent enough for Lois to unhook and wiggle her way out of the chains. Clark was unconscious . "Oh my god, Clark..."

She looped her arms under his and pulled him out of the room and away from the gas. His eyes remained closed as she shook him. She whispered his name and gently slapped his cheek when his eyes fluttered open. A wide grin ripped across her face as he muttered, "'ois."

"You idiot, Smallville. I'm the one that's supposed to kill you, remember? It was in our wedding vows," she whispered.

Before Clark could respond, Lois pressed her lips to his and poured out every bit of emotion she had into this one kiss. When she finally came back up for air, a silly daze was streaked across her husband's face despite their current surroundings. Then, a smiled formed.

"Worth it."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did it live up to expectations? haha. I had to get some of my all-time favorite Lex Luthor lines like, "_It's open_" from when Superman breaks into his hideout in _Superman: The Movie_. And of course the "_Once again, the press underestimates me!_" line from _Superman Returns_. I also put a spin on what I thought was a huge moment in Clark and Lex's friendship when Lex told him that he didn't steal Lana, Clark lost her all on his own.

If you look at the computer monitors in '_Bulletproof_' (I think, no promises! haha), you can see Version 1 of the Prometheus suit (Lana stole #2). It's the battle suit that Lex often wears in the comics for when he physically fights against Superman. Mine is a bit less bulky than even the one we saw on the monitor since Lex could hide it under a suit, haha, but just stay with me! hahaha.

And of course, that last bit was the kill-me-or-kiss-me moment, haha. It was pretty long, but I felt like it ought to be. This is Lex and Clark's first kind of violent meeting since he came back from the dead in my mind. I think he comes back, he says this and that to Clark, and then this is his first big plan, haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! Shoot me a review! Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking "_Clois' Office"._


	120. Basement

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! haha. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to reply before I posted the next chapter, I saw your review almost right after I posted the chapter. Nope, there was no Lana, I'll warn everyone before I bring her back, haha. (Dorm!) I like writing the fight scenes, but it's also kind of hard to write it without saying the same thing over and over again, you know? That's why they end up kind of short.

**_alexindigo_** - It lived up to expectations? Perfect! hahaha. I think that Lex and Clark are very similar to the Joker and Batman. They are so equal, and it's each other that drive them to become what they ultimately become. Lex is driven to defeat Clark, and Clark is driven to keep Lex at bay. Lex and the Joker would be dreadfully bored without them to annoy and I think both Bats and Supes would regress without those two to keep them on their toes.

Can't wait to hear what you think of Chuck! haha. Clois' Office will be a fun bit with the couple, Jimmy, and Perry, but I don't want to give anything away because it's pretty funny, hahaha. I'm thinking that the new Superman movie is going to be a real labored origin story and that's just going to be boring if you ask me. We all know how he comes to be Superman. Give him a new physical villain so we can see something new.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Aww, haha. That's super nice of you to say! haha. And yeah, Spacey was easily my #2. Wasn't a fan of Gene Hackman. Kind of turned a wonderfully bad ass character like Lex into your run-of-the-mill bad guy. Didn't like that.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Oh man, now I won't be able to surprise you! hahaha. But yeah, that site is a great place for info. I really struggle with buying comics right now because I don't want to jump in the middle, you know? It's like trying to find a good TV show to watch from Day 1. But I would honestly recommend anything written by Geoff Johns, he's my favorite writer right now. Superman: Secret Origins was awesome.

I love Dr. Fate as well, and I was really sad that he was gone after two episodes, but it's hard to keep anyone around on a show like this. There's always a new character to introduce and have a whole episode about. Oliver is really the exception, and that's really because he's Smallville's Batman. He really has the same relationship with Clark that Bruce has with Superman in the comics.

_**svgurl410**_ - Haha, if you like Jo'an, you're going to like this story, I think. Lots and lots of Jo'an over the course of the story. But I'm glad that you liked the first five or so chapters, and I look forward to hearing what you think of the rest!

**_NeverSayNever95_** - Was that night the greatest moment ever watching him buzz Martha's bell? Oh man! hahaha. I was cheering so loud!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #120, the Daily Planet Basement

**Author's Note:** I know I said "Clois Office" was next, but I'm beat, so I just finished my most-finished chapter, I'll get it for next time!

* * *

Water dripping.

That was the first thing that Jimmy Olsen noticed as he slowly woke up. Opening his eyes for the first time, he found himself in a dark room. He could hear a few spots where the water dripped. Which only intensified the creepiness of this moment for him.

He tried to stand up, but found his hands tied behind his back and his feet to the legs of the chair he was sitting on.

"Hello?"

His attempts were met with silence.

"Is anyone there?"

Somewhere in the distance, he heard a door slowly creek open. He squinted, trying to see through the darkness. His attempts were proving futile until he saw two shapes in the distance. If he looked close enough, he could make out that one shape was shorter than the other. As he tried to focus, he began to hear what sounded like hushed whispers. Jimmy took another chance at calling out, "Hello? I can hear you talking."

The whispers stopped.

Suddenly, two very bright lights were shining in his face.

"Jimmy Olsen?" asked a distorted voice.

"Uh...yeah?"

There was a scuffling on the other side of the lights. Jimmy thought he heard someone say that they didn't want to do this.

"Shut your face," the voice said.

"What?"

"Not you."

"Oh, ok," offered a very nervous Jimmy. "Can you uh...can you telling what this is all about? What am I doing here? Who are you?"

There was a long pause.

"I...uh...am the...uh...Queen of Hearts!"

Whoever else was standing in the dark snorted. Then he heard something smack something.

Jimmy frowned, "Were you not sure?"

"What?"

"You sounded kind of unsure..."

"I'm sure."

"You didn't sound sure."

"Well I am."

"Ok, but-"

"Shut it, Olsen!"

Jimmy quickly closed his mouth, his eyes widening considerably.

"Now, the reason that you are here today, Mr. Olsen, is to decide whether or not you are fit to marry the young Lucy Lane."

"What does Lucy have to do with this?"

"Everything."

Jimmy frowned, "I don't think that what goes on between me and Lucy Lane is any of your business."

"Why you little-"

Jimmy heard a scuffle in the darkness, and then there were hushed whispers again. A loud groan followed what sounded like a foot stomp.

"_Anyways_..." Even with the distorted voice, Jimmy could detect annoyance in his captor's voice. "...I have a few questions for you."

"Fine. But I'm not answering anything...you know...sexual."

"Oh god. So gross."

Jimmy frowned, '_Is this how kidnappers usually act?_'

"What is Lucy's real name?"

"Lucille."

"How many siblings does she have?"

"One sister."

"How awesome would you describe this sister?"

He didn't really know what to say, "Pretty...awesome, I guess?"

"You guess?"

"Well, I mean, what kind of question is that suppo-"

"Answer the question, Olsen!"

Jimmy flinched, "She's awesome, ok? She's a reporter for the Daily Planet. She's married to my buddy CK."

"Would you classify her reporting skills as better than this...CK...person?"

Before he could answer, he could hear hushed whispers again and the swatting of clothes.

"Uh...what does any of this have to do with me and Lucy?"

"It's relevant."

"How?"

"It just is."

"But-"

"Do not question the Queen of Diamonds!"

"I thought you said you were the Queen of Hearts?"

There was a long pause.

"What kind of cereal does Lucy like?"

"Cocoa Puffs."

"Aha! Wrong answer, Sucker!"

Jimmy shook his head, "Uh...no it's not."

"It is a proven fact that Lucy Lane has loved, and always will love, Fruit Loops."

"Well, she likes Fruit Loops. But she likes Cocoa Puffs because she likes to have chocolate after we...uh..._you know_..."

There was another long pause.

"Oh god, don't ever say that again! My mind! I thought Olsens were supposed to be wholesome?"

"Look, I'm getting kind of tired of this. I love Lucy and I'm going to marry her. I don't have to prove that to some Queen of whatever. Lucy makes me feel like I'm the luckiest guy on the planet. Even more special then when Superman gave me that watch-"

There was a scuffle again as a deeper voice came through the distorter, "But that was still pretty special, right?"

"Give me that back!" cried the other voice. "Continue, Mr. Olsen."

"I love her, ok? And I don't know who you are, or what you want to hear, but that's all that matters to me. I want to marry that girl."

Jimmy was faintly sure that he heard a woman say '_aww_' before a _whoosh_ing sound left him alone in the dark. Silence fell over again as he sat there for a few moments, "Uh...is anyone there? I'm kind of tied up here. Kind of need to get back to work..."

Lois and Clark exited the elevator arm-in-arm, Lois seemed all matter of pleased with herself.

"Are you happy now?" asked an amused Clark.

"I am," she told him while fiddling with Oliver's voice changer. "This thing is awesome by the way. Definitely going on my christmas list."

Clark rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I'll jot it down just after jet-back and the Stiletto-mobile."

"Hey, a Stiletto-moblie is completely practical. How am I going to get to work if you're off doing your other job on the other side of the planet?"

He laughed, "You might want to look into these things called taxis?"

"Shut your face, Smallville. Now go untie Jimmy. I have to call Zee and tell her how well her potion worked for knocking him out."

"I can't believe you went through all of this. You love that kid, Lois. And you know he loves Lucy too."

Lois gave him a look, "You remember that kill-me-or-kiss-me thing we're always going on and on about?"

Clark nodded.

"Well, you're about to get a whole lot of the former if you don't _whoosh_ down there and untie the kid."

He laughed and _whoosh_ed towards the basement.

Lois rolled her eyes, '_It's my baby sister we're talking about. Besides, does a girl need a reason to stage an impromptu interrogation? I think not!_'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, haha, what did you guys think? I wanted to have Lois kind of interrogate Jimmy to see if he really loved Lucy, and his little speech told her everything she needed to know! haha. I'm sure you all knew it was Lois and Clark early on, haha, but I tried to keep it a mystery for at least the first few sentences, haha. Anyways, I'm super tired, so I'm going to call it a night. Hope you liked it! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Clois' Office._


	121. Break Room

Review Comments:

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hints of Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #121, the Break Room at the Daily Planet.

**Author's Note:** This was supposed to be the Clois Office, but after writing, I realized that none of the scenes take place in the actual office! haha. I'll write one for it later on, I promise! haha. I was watching _Castle_ the other day and I had to write this chapter inspired by my favorite Castle/Beckett fight!

* * *

"Kent! Kent!"

"That's Lane-Kent, Chief!"

Perry rolled his eyes, "Whatever the hell it is. Get in here!"

The dynamic duo showed up a moment later to see what their editor wanted this time. Clark had his head down with his note pad out to take notes. Lois stood with a hand on her hip and an eyebrow raised, waiting for Perry to bark and order. "What's up, Chief?"

"I want Kent to interview Superman."

Clark's head shot up. "What?"

"Chief, I'm the one who covers the Superman stories around here," reminded Lois.

Perry shook his head, "Sales are down, Lois. The guys upstairs think that a fresh take will sell more papers. People are tired of reading what Lois Lane has to say about the Man of Steel. They want to see someone new take a swing at the guy."

Lois and Clark exchanged looks, "You think that people are tired of hearing what Lois Lane has to say about Superman? You can't be serious?"

"Not me. Upstairs. Look, it's not about you, Lois. It's about selling a few more papers. You'll still be my go-to reporter when the stuff hits the fan."

Clark saw the vein about to burst in his wife's forehead, so he decided to speak up. "Chief, I'm not really sure that's the best-"

"Don't sell yourself short, Kent. You've got snappy, punchy prose. And I figure that out of everyone on the staff, you're the only person who can withstand Lois trying to kill you. After all, your little kiss-or-kill game is the main source of the daily bets down in the mail room."

The mild-mannered reporter glanced over at Lois, who was doing her best to keep her anger in check.

"Honestly, Mr. White, I'm not even half the reporter that Lois is..."

Perry waved his hand, "It's already been decided, now get out there and get me a story!"

The two slowly exited the office. They walked, side-by-side, towards their own office when Clark couldn't take the silence any longer.

"So...you don't mind if, you know, _I_...interview Superman?"

Lois shrugged, "Why not? It's not like I asked for the first interview anyways."

Clark frowned at her tone. It sounded an awful lot like she didn't even care about it, and that kind of brought out a new side of Clark.

"You know, a lot of people would be flattered if a certain superhero chose them their personal journalist. Their _only_...journalist."

Lois began to glare, "Flattered?"

"Yeah."

"Do you have _any_ idea how much grief I've had to put with over this _Superman_ thing? The constant _nagging_ to get the scoop on the Man of Steel?"

Clark laughed coldly, "Gee. I'm sorry."

"I'm not asking you to be sorry. I'm just...just do whatever you want to do, it's not like you'd defy Perry anyways!"

"Fine. It's settled then."

"Fine!"

"_I'll_ do an interview with Superman!"

"Great!"

"You know, it's just as well, it was the prose of Lois Lane that brought Perry to me anyways!"

Lois let her jaw drop, "Lois Lane...was not the problem. There just wasn't enough substance to write about!"

"Oh, believe me, there is _plenty_ of substance! He just needs a better writer!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Lois turned on her heel, walked into their office, and slammed the door in Clark's face. He stood there for a few moments, grumbling to himself, before turning and making his way towards the break room. Jimmy Olsen's head popped up out of his cubical like a whack-a-mole. "_Uh oh..._"

Jimmy made his way towards the break room, trying to be stealthy in his footsteps as if approaching a large bear.

"Uh...CK?"

Clark turned to see the young photographer's head peeking through the door, "Huh? Oh...hey Jimmy."

Jimmy slowly entered the room, "What's up, buddy?"

"Oh nothing...Perry wants me to write a piece about _Superman_."

"And Lois is-"

"Lois is mad."

Jimmy nodded and clicked his tongue, "Gotcha."

"I just don't understand why she can't admit that writing Superman means something to her."

Before jimmy could speak, the break room door flew open.

"And another thing! I can't believe that you would take the story when you know how much it means to me!"

"Aha!"

"Aha what?"

"I knew that it meant something to you!"

Lois rolled her eyes, "Of course it means something to me, you idiot!"

"But you said that it didn't!"

"I am a Lane, Smallville! A Lane! I say things I don't mean all the freaking time!"

"That's true."

The couple looked to Jimmy Olsen, who was suddenly very embarrassed, "Sorry."

"Lois, I wouldn't take the article if I didn't have to. You know that. It's kind of weird for me to write about Superman anyways, you know?"

Clark gave Lois a look that Jimmy totally interpreted wrong. "Hey CK, it's not your fault that you don't know Superman."

"_What?_" they asked in unison.

Jimmy gulped. "Well, it's gotta be tough that only you know Superman, Lois. CK wouldn't even know where to start."

They shared a funny glance, "Yeah, Jimmy. That's exactly it."

Jimmy looked victorious over the matter.

"You know what, Jimmy?" The young red head looked up at Clark, "You're right."

"I am?"

Clark nodded, "I'm going to go in there and tell Mr. White exactly what I think about all of this."

Jimmy's eyes shot open, "Wait, what? That's not...CK! Wait up!"

The trio stormed across the main floor on their way to the Editor-in-Chief's office, where Perry White almost looked like he was expecting them.

"Chief, I'm not ok with this."

She held up her hand, "Clark, it's fine-"

"No. It's not. Look, Mr. White, I don't care what those guys upstairs told you. I don't know the first thing about Superman, and Lois should be writing all the stories that pertain to him. Lois Lane is the best damn reporter on this masthead, sir." Lois looked at Clark with the most loving expression.

"You really think that, Smallville?"

He looked at her with a loving smile, "I do."

The Editor-in-Chief and star-intern-photographer watched as Lois grabbed Clark's hand and stormed out of the office. She whipped him around in front of their office door, threw herself at him with a kiss that knocked the couple through the door and onto the office floor below. The last thing they saw as the door closed was one of Lois's heels flying into the air. Perry let a content sigh as he turned back to his desk.

"What do you think is going to happen, Chief?"

Perry smirked, "Lois will write the article and Clark will slap his name on it. Which is pretty much what I figured would happen from the beginning."

Jimmy frowned, "If you knew that was what was going to happen, why ask Clark to write it at all?"

"Because I wanted to light a fire under my top reporter's ass, Olsen. That's why. Within two weeks, she'll write a Pulitzer Prize winner. You watch."

The young photographer looked at his editor in disbelief, "Mr. White...that's kind of messed up."

"That's journalism, Olsen."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? haha. It was really the fight that spurred this whole idea, Castle and Beckett are going back and forth about Nikki Heat and for whatever reason, it just popped in my head for Clark and Lois to do the same, haha. I kind of filled in the rest with what came to me, hopefully it all fits together somehow, haha. And of course, I loved getting to write Perry and Jimmy yet again!

I hope that Lois wanting to kill Clark and then ends up...uh...doing whatever they do...in their office...counts as a Kill Me or Kiss Me moment? haha. Also, I intended for this to take place somehow in their office, but it ended up like this, so I changed the name. Sorry guys! hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Legion Ring_.


	122. Legion Ring

**Review Comments (I don't know where my replies went, guys! Sorry about that!):**

_**Ella Ride**_ - Yeah, it's very similar to the relationship between the Joker and Batman in that way. And having Lex and Clark have their past, I think that the whole situation just gets more intensified. And yeah we saw Clark be able to hold himself back when Alicia was murdered, but of course, that's a bit different than Lois or Martha. I'm not really sure what he would do. I don't think he'd be the same Superman anymore.

**_s01itaire90_** - Haha, that's not fair! hahaha. I have 'Clois' in almost (I think all of them) all the chapters! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**alexindigo**_ - I wanted Clark to tag along just because I don't think Lois would do it without him, haha. Besides, someone needs to be the voice of reason in that situation! hahaha. My (recently) ex used to say "shut your face!" all the time (in a funny way) and I kind of integrated it into the character, haha. I try to keep her saying that from time to time. I can just picture her rolling down the road with the windows down, haha.

I love Adam Baldwin, and of course that stems back to Firefly! haha. Zach Levi is quickly becoming one of my favorites. I don't know what your tastes are in movies, but he was awesome in _Spiral_ with Joel Moore. And yes, I know you're a loyal stalk-...uh...fan...hahaha.

Turns out that Clark Luthor is redeemable, haha. Kind of makes my appearances of him post-Luthor AU now, haha. As well as my Crime Syndicate chapter because if he becomes a good guy, he won't be teaming up with Owlman and Superwoman anytime soon I was really happy that it wasn't Bizarro all over again like I feared, so I hear you there. And yeah, that line about Smallville (the person, not the place) was just perfect for me!

I really thought that he was going to come back to Earth-1 so that he could find Martha! But I really hope we see what happens after he rings that bell! I was very impressed with Cassidy Freeman as well, she looked stunning and she nailed it. Can't wait to see where her story goes!

While I definitely think he's still scared of his wife, haha, I think that Clark is the least scared of the group. I'm glad that everyone liked Perry here, haha, I was worried that people were going to think he was an ass for pulling that on them, haha. And yeah, you gotta love Jimmy, haha. I'm really considering writing a chapter where we dip into the M territory just for you! haha. Hang in there! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Yeah, I don't know who I am picturing as young Jimmy. He's tough to cast for me, but I frequently picture Aaron Ashmore when we first met him just because he was perfectly cast in that role. I'm glad that I could fool you for a few minutes! hahaha. It's not a big deal to answer comments, I don't know why my replies disappeared for that chapter, sorry about that guys!

I will write a chapter that takes place within the office itself! So no worries! haha. I loved 'Kent'! Especially Earth-2 Jonathan!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I think Lois just wanted to play the part, haha. She's very theatric in that way, hahaha.

_**Ina100years**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it!

**_sasslady_** - She is very easily distracted, haha. I'm glad that you liked Jimmy, I really wanted to make him surprisingly brave and sweet. And I'm glad that you liked the Lex/Clark show down. I think that Lois is the only one that we'd all be ok with, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Beware! It's addicting! haha. You'll start reading and you'll go a mile a minute! haha. I absolutely love Geoff Johns! He is the best writer since Stan Lee as far as I'm concerned, haha. Just remember when you look at Blue Beetle that you look up Jamie Reyes, not Ted Kord, though Ted is going to be in the episode as well I think. I think that I need to write a chapter where Lucy finds out, haha.

You have to stop coming up with these awesome ideas! hahaha. You're going to end up putting them in your own story and run me out of business! haha. I think I'll have to write that chapter now! haha. I just keep picturing it in my head now! hahahaha.

Being a big sports guy, I always hear about "lighting a fire under the team" and I just thought it would make for a really funny bit, haha. And yeah, getting to write Jimmy is one of the big perks of writing this. He's always a blast to write! Of course she's going to kiss him more often! haha. No matter what she says, Lois is always going to end up kissing Clark Kent. It's just the way that she rolls! hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that I still "nailed" it, haha. It was similarly tough to pull it off in that Diana/Bruce chapter a while back. I always find that to be interesting because you would think it would be some alien or some monster that would be his ultimate opponent, but it's always been Lex. And yeah, I think you've got that one right, haha. I can just picture her in court saying "Ask the minister! Ask the brides maids! I'm allowed!" hahaha.

Haha, I'm glad that you liked that bit about the name! haha. The original line was Stiletto, haha, but I thought that was too obvious. I love Castle, as it ought to be obvious, haha. Castle is Captain Reynolds! hahaha. I had to watch it! And I was not disappointed at it's awesomeness!

_**daphy8yahoo(dot)ca**_ - Yeah, when it comes to Lois, Clark always finds the courage to pull off the impossible, haha.

**_Leli1013_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #122, the Legion Ring

**Author's Note:** I was watching this interview with Erica Durance where she was talking about how surprised she was about having to be blonde for the Season 4 Lois Lane and I just came up with this idea and wanted to write a chapter about it. Hope you like it!

* * *

Clark spun around as he came out of the warp, his vision blurred as the room spun.

Once it stopped, he looked around.

'_Ok...I'm still at the farm,_' he thought with a sigh. '_What's the worst that can happen?_'

"Move out of the way, Smallville."

Clark spun to see Lois Lane standing behind him. Blonde hair and all.

"What?"

He didn't say a word. Lois became annoyed.

"What are you looking at?"

"Your hair."

She turned to the mirror and looked at it intently, "What? What's wrong with it?"

"It's blonde."

Lois turned around slowly, "Yeah...what other color would it be?"

"Brown?"

She narrowed her gaze, "What? What is that supposed to mean? Do you think it would look better brown?"

Clark laughed. Lois froze.

"Not that I _care_ about what you think about my hair, Smallville."

He smiled, "I think it would look beautiful, Lois."

Lois looked at him with big eyes, "What did you just say?"

Clark opened his mouth but Lois cut him off, "You look funny."

"What do you mean?" he asked nervously.

She eyed him for a moment, not quite sure how to word what she saw in his face.

"You look...kind of older. Has little Clarkie not been getting any sleep thinking about my pretty hair?" she asked in a baby voice.

There was something about the look in her eye, the tone in her voice, and the smirk on her face that made Clark's stomach do flip flops. He grinned like a maniac when he realized the upper-hand that he now had knowing that deep down, Lois secretly had a thing for him all along just like he had.

Clark smirked right back at her, "Something like that."

Lois was taken aback by his boldness, "Wha...what?"

He took a step closer to her, "I think that brown would look great on you."

She began to tremble under his gaze. '_What the hell? Since when did Clark Kent get so, so, so, damn sexy? Did I just say sexy? What the f-_'

"If you kiss me for a joke...I swear to god...I'm going to kill you."

Clark grinned, moving just a tiny bit closer, "I would never do that, Lois. You know...kiss you for a joke."

Her eyes grew big as she realized the implications of his words. Normally, this is when he would blush and start fumbling and bumbling as he tried to explain his way out of the situation But not this time. For some reason, he seemed to only get more confident. And for some reason, Lois liked that. The two moved their faces closer and Lois closed her eyes in preparation for what ought to be the best kiss of her entire life.

Just then, there was a flash of light that made Clark look back. Conner Kent was standing in the kitchen, mouthing '_I'm sorry!_'

Casting one lack look at Lois, Clark blurred towards Conner and whispered quickly, "I told you that you're not ready for a Legion Ring yet!"

Conner grimaced and nodded while putting a hand on Clark's shoulder. In a flash, the two were gone. Meanwhile, Lois was waiting for a kiss that never came. When she finally opened her eyes, Lois saw an empty living room. "What the..."

The front door swung open and in walked Clark Kent and Chloe Sullivan. Lois promptly marched up to him and grabbed him by the collar.

"What the hell do you think you're playing at, Smallville?"

Clark looked at Lois in shock, "Lois, what are you talking about?"

"You were just in here making a pass at me!"

His eyes bugged out, "What?"

Lois eyed him closely and noticed his changed outfit. And that he didn't look any older than he did this morning. And his hair was cut different.

"Uh...Cuz? Clark has been with me all day today..."

She eyed Chloe with a glare, "He was just in here, Chlo."

Chloe shifted nervously under Lois's gaze. "I promise you, Lois. Clark was with me."

Lois looked from Chloe to Clark. Then back to Chloe. And then back to Clark.

"Are you trying to tell me that I just imagined that whole thing?"

The duo nodded nervously. Lois pointed at Clark viciously , "I..._HATE_...this town."

"What does that have to do with me?"

Lois jutted her finger at him again so he raised his hands in defeat. As she walked up the stairs to her/Clark's room, she had one thought.

'_I can't believe I just had **another** fantasy about Clark Kent! What the hell is wrong with me?_'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, hahaha, what did you think? haha. And uh...what do you mean _another_ fantasy, Lois? hahaha. I was trying to think of some more bits for Conner's training and I thought that maybe Clark would show him the time-travel bit, and that ended up being the setting for the chapter. Also, I kind of thought it would be funny to have Lois see the two different versions of Clark Kent without really realizing it, haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _the Metropolis University Dormitory._


	123. Dormitory

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Who said it was only one fantasy? hahaha.

**_clarkfan325_** - Thanks!

_**Andi**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked them!

**_sasslady_** - I think he couldn't help himself seeing a chance to finally get an upper-hand on her! haha. Normally, Clark would never do something that might change the timeline, haha. But the chance to get a win against Lois Lane? Even he can't resist that! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - No confusion! haha. I keep track of you all! haha. One of these days, you're going to realize that you've got these great ideas and put us all out of business, you watch, haha. I admit that I've been inspired by a lot of your ideas over the course of this story! 122 chapters just means I've been at this for a while, haha. Don't give me too much credit now, haha.

Yeah, there is no way that he'd be so bold if not for the fact that he finally had a chance to top young Lois Lane like that, haha. I don't think he'd be able to stop himself! hahaha. Yeah, she was confused then, but I'm not sure she will be when Clark gets back, hahaha. Hint Hint! hahaha.

**_A,sky_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it!

_**White-Falcon06**_ - It's tough sometimes to make it fit, but for the most part, I've kept it up. That's one of the things I'm most proud of, so thanks! Also, I'm glad that you like the inclusion of other characters. I think having so many characters involved makes it a lot more fun!

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked that bit, haha. It's one of the many little ways that an Clois-er like myself can pretend that they were into each other the whole time even if they wouldn't have admitted it to anyone, haha. Including themselves, hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I'm not a prude! haha. Oh, we're going to see how Lois reacts, haha. I think that you guys are going to like it! hahaha. The El's relationship with the Legion is a lot more pronounced in the comics, as we will see a lot with Booster Gold in the upcoming episode I think, so I thought that part of Conner's training might be how he'd go visit the Legion in the future. I imagined Clark getting shot to the past like Brainiac did in _Homecoming_.

Lol, I'll write one for you one of these days, haha. Even when I write other stuff, I don't usually have a lot of sex scenes, so it's always just been my kind of style to leave stuff to the imagination, haha. But I will put the effort in for you sometime int he future, haha.

I'm not sure that Earth-2 Lois will ever forgive Clark Luthor for everything he has done. If she does, it would be just too forced for me. I don't see how she could do it. Even if he is a version of her Smallville. I did see the promo! It was freaking awesome! haha. I'm so pumped because not only were the scenes completely awesome, I'm super excited that the John Williams theme is going to get used! That would be so awesome!

Lane Smith _is_ my Perry White. No doubt. Since he's passed away, I don't know who I'd go with. I like John Goodman. I've always been a big fan of him and he certainly has the bark down pat, but I'm not sure. Bruce McGill could be good. I hear Alec Baldwin a lot, but he's far from perfect. Hugh Laurie sounds like a great idea though! As for Jimmy, Sam Huntington (Superman Returns) has been my favorite so far. He really got the nervous yet excited aspect of Jimmy that I love! Aaron Ashmore was great, but he was confident and self-assured, and I prefer my Jimmy to be goofy and nervous, haha. I'm not sure who could play him in the new movie, just off the top of my head, I could see Johnny Simmons (Young Neil from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World) as Jimmy.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Clana, mentions of Lexana, hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #123, the Metropolis University Dormitory

**Author's Note:** I was watching '_Oracle_' for my '_Birthday_' chapter, and I got this funny idea for a chapter. Here it is! Enjoy!

* * *

"Did you know that Clark was a football hero?" asked Lois while trying to look innocent.

Lana laughed, "Yeah. I know. I was there."

Lois nodded away with a smile, acting as if she actually thought that she was being totally subtle. "Does Lex play sports?"

"I don't think-"

"Yeah, I didn't think so. He doesn't have that whole...you know...rugged...athlete...hunk thing going on."

Lana gave Lois a funny look, "Lois...are you saying that you think Clark is rugged, athletic, and hunky?"

"What? Of course not!" yelled Lois. She noticed the large number of people staring at her and she laughed nervously, "I'm just saying that..._someone_..." she gave Lana a little wink, "...might think that. And uh...that kind of quality can be attractive in a man."

Nodding at Lois, Lana decided to play along. "Clark is certainly attractive. I'll give you that."

"He's pretty smart too, you know. Did you know that he actually read the books our teachers used to assign in high school? He must have super-reading skills or something, because I'll tell you what, those things just sent me to snores-ville."

"Did you know that Lex has reestablished Luthorcorp as one of the top companies in the world? Even higher than Queen Industries."

Lois froze, "Uh...I think that Clark took an economics class?"

This brought a laugh out of Lana. For someone that claimed to be such a good listener, maybe Lois ought to listen to herself a little more. Seeing that Lois was very keen on making her point known, Lana decided to throw out something that even Lois couldn't deny.

"Clark is just so secretive, you know?"

Lois shrugged, "I guess."

Lana frowned, "You don't think so?" Lois shrugged again. "You never wonder what he's keeping all bottled up?"

"Well, yeah. I _wonder_. But it's _Smallville_. It's not like it's something bad. He's got too good of a heart for that. He'll tell me when he's ready."

Giving her a sad smile, Lana asked, "You really think Clark will ever tell you?"

Lois didn't even hesitate. "I do." When she noticed the surprise on Lana's face, she quickly added, "Because we used to live together, you know? Secrets are always getting spilt at the Kent Farm!" she laughed nervously. "Bunch of gossipers, them Kents."

Lana gave her a funny look. Silently wondering if Lois really thought that about the Kents. After a moment of thought, she seemed to come to the conclusion that maybe Lois didn't know the Kents as well as she thought. After all, she thought that Clark would tell her his secret someday.

"The thing with Clark is that...even if he's not telling you all the little details, he has always worn his heart on his sleeve. Secretive or not, there isn't a bad bone in that boy's body. He might not always tell you the truth, but his eyes _always_ tell me the truth. I know that no matter what he's got going on under all that that plaid..." she kind of looked away with a smile, like she just realized something. "...he will always be there for me."

The other brunette didn't seem to know what to say. Lana watched Lois give her a small, yet very confident smile accompanied with a shrug.

"And deep down, if you really had to ask yourself that hard question...do you think that Lex could do the same?"

It was that line that stopped Lana in her tracks. She had her questions about Lex's willingness to trust her. His willingness to be honest with her. But at the end of the day, Lex had shown her those files and he had told her his secrets. That was enough for her to take a leap of faith on him. That was more than Clark had been willing to do for her. "That was uh...you two have really gotten close over the last year, huh?"

Lois blushed. "What? I don't know...I guess you could...Smallville has just been...well..._Smallville_," she laughed.

She noticed the way that Lana looked away with a sort of questioning look.

"Look, I know that sometimes, he's a real idiot. And you just wanna...kill the guy, but I mean...sometimes..."

Lana smirked, "You want to kiss him?"

Lois froze.

"I wouldn't put them in those words." Her eyes widened, so she quickly added, "And especially not for me. Not for me," she repeated hazily. "But for you...I could see that...I mean, you know, I could see how you might want to kiss...you know..._him_..."

Lana nodded with a sly smile, "I'm sure that you can, Lois."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Lois asked defensively.

"Nothing," laughed Lana. "I'm just saying that we can both agree that Clark is a great guy."

Lois nodded slowly for a moment. "For you."

"Yes, Lois. I get that you seem to think that Clark would be a great guy for me," she laughed. "Seems like he'd be good for a lot of girls."

A frown emerged on Lois's face, "But not all girls. Like me."

Lana nodded with a knowing smirk, "If you say so."

"I'm just saying...you won't find a more trust worthy guy than Clark Kent," offered Lois.

Lana smiled. "He certainly has his moments, I'll give you that," she laughed as she opened the door to her dorm room.

And that's when they saw Clark. Going through Lana's things. "What are you doing?" asked Lana.

"Smooth one, Smallville."

Clark swallowed. This wasn't his best moment ever. "I have something I have to talk to you about."

"How did you get in here?" demanded Lana as she snatched the photo from his hand.

"Lana..."

"I think I just heard a keg being tapped, I'm gunna go check it out," explained Lois before rushing out the door.

Shutting the door behind her, she let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. _'That guy has absolutely ridiculous timing..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I wanted to expand upon this idea that Lois and Lana talked on Lana's love life, and for whatever reason, I was thinking that Lois would plead his case and end up revealing more about herself and Clark than she would sell Lana on Clark, haha. As always with the pre-Clois Lois Lane, I had to keep her playing denial even though it's oh so obvious to everyone else that she wants a slice of what Clark's got, hahaha.

I tried to write Lana as a good person here. I think that Clark choosing not to tell her his secret created this kind of desire to be trusted, and Lex being (seemingly) so open with her about his own secrets made her all the more attracted to him. So for me, I've always tried to look at Lana as a person who just desperately wanted what Clark couldn't give her, and that doesn't necessarily make her a bad person. Not that I'm going to forgive her for her relationship with Lex or anything, haha. Just saying that I can understand why she made the mistake that she made with Lex.

Anyways, I hope all the Lana-ness didn't drag you guys down! haha. Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Green Arrow (Clark Kent)_. Yeah, you guys know what I'm talking about! hahaha.


	124. Green Arrow Clark

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - All of them? hahaha. I hope my retirement home has wi-fi, because I'm going to be at this a while! hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Well gee, I'm sorry! hahaha. And yeah, I've had a very complicated relationship with Lana Lang because I was too familiar with the comics and Superman in general when I started watching the show. I was waiting for Lois Lane from day one, and that made me unable to like Lana too much because in the back of my head, my inner-fanboy was screaming, "This is such a waste of time, Lana is going to be gonzo here in a minute!" Now, as a writer, and as an adult (chronologically speaking, haha), I know that it's extremely unusual to have just one love, but the fanboy in me wasn't hearing any of it, haha.

I think that not only can we see what went wrong with Clana, we can see how it made Clois better in the long run. The mistakes that Clark made while being with Lana made him a better partner for when he finally wised up to Lois. And yeah, I'm not about to defend Lana's choices. She made plenty of mistakes, to be honest, they both did. That's just the way things go. It's rarely one side or the other, and Clana is a perfect example of that.

Well, if I have my facts right, Superman Returns takes place after Superman II. And Clark did tell Lois who he was when he slept with her. He just erases her memory of it. I didn't think that they needed to have the kid for the story to work just fine, I figured that was to set up for the future, but they never got a chance to make that future. I really wish we could have seen what Bryan Singer would have done in a sequel, he's a great director.

_**A,sky**_ - I'm glad that you liked her! haha. This is a tough crowd to bring her into without getting a negative reaction! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Well, alexindigo offered up the idea of Hugh Laurie, and I have to admit, I kind of like it, haha. And yeah, I agree with you, Lois isn't as girly as Rachel is, I was thinking that as I was writing it, haha. But I wanted to continue that kind of thought process, haha. I'm glad that you liked it the ending of the Kent Nelson chapter! haha. I was kind of grasping at straws for how to end it without being too anti-climactic! haha.

How does Lois ever talk Clark into these things? haha. How did she talk him into being on Good Morning, Metropolis? hahaha. Oh wait, what? We're going to cover that in a future chapter? Hmmmm, hahaha. Oh how I love throwing the little teases out there, haha.

You love Castle? I love Castle! hahaha. My pen name is Captain _freaking_ Tightpants! hahaha. Nathan Fillion is the man! I have seen the Caskett forum and I have to tell you, you guys did a great job over there! Poor Jimmy? haha. He loves it! haha. Don't doubt that!

Psh. He'd never, ever _admit_ to dreaming about Lois, hahaha. And as for Lois, good god, haha. I don't think I have enough fingers to count! hahaha.

Lois has never been subtle! hahaha. But she sure knows how to play the denial card, haha. I saw the impish look on her face when she busted in on Clark in the shower at the very beginning of her life in Smallville (with Smallville, haha). I think I'll have to agree with you. Lana just wanted to be the first one to have Clark tell his secret to, and that's why she butted her big, ugly head (sorry Kristin Kreuk, I can't help myself) into Clois's business! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, well, I would read that hot mess! But well, I really can't give you too much grief about inspiring me because if it does keep you (and everyone else) coming back, I'll keep on taking it! hahaha. I meant that we'll see how future Lois reacts, haha, but now (as always) you've put an idea in my head for a completely different chapter! haha. You see what you're doing to me? haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Well, that's a complicated situation right there, and I'll tell you why. I don't think she would either. But I didn't want to be too harsh or have some Lana bashing going on. So here's what I'm thinking, and maybe you'll see where I'm going with this. I'm thinking that it was more that Lana was looking down on Lois here in kind of a, "This poor girl thinks Clark would ever tell her" kind of way and was actually making fun of her almost.

If that makes sense?

Like she almost finds it amusing that Lois thinks these things. It was really hard to walk that line because in my head, I was trying to avoid having Lana come off like a bitch, haha. But at the same time, I think she finds what Lois had to say to be almost laughable.

**_sasslady_** - I don't think that Lois knew either, but I like to imagine that there was a connection that neither of them could deny. They just couldn't define it either. There were plenty of moments where Lois was almost egging him on to try something. A big moment for me was when they were in the locker room during 'Facade' and she goes, "So you have been checking me out?" and of course the bathroom scene from "Gone". That's why I've tried to lay the ground work to say that Lois has always been attracted to Clark, but she's a commit-aphobe and she worries about hurting Chloe's feelings.

And after she started to think that way, she tried to push down those feelings with her constant ribbing and teasing until she reached this kind of comfortable feeling with him. Kind of a, "You're a huge part of my life, and we don't have to label it as anything else," period.

_**svgurl410**_ - I have to admit, I stole that Bruce/Oliver dynamic from mygyps17! haha. But I'm glad that you liked it! Yeah, the thing with that whole Oliver/Chloe bit there was so that I could open up a window for the Dollie fans to have their fun too. In the end, I've had Chlollie reign supreme, even if some of the readers wanna kill me over it, haha. I'm glad you liked Clois, and yeah, Jo'an always hits the nail on the head, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** T (A few mild swear words, but nothing you haven't heard before on Smallville.)

**Pairing:** Lollie, hints of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #124, Green Arrow (Clark Kent)

**Author's Note: **I have no idea where this came from, it just popped in my head while I was re-watching '_Hydro_' for the '_Inquisitor_' chapter!

* * *

Walking into Queen Tower, Clark felt good about his plan with Oliver. Lois certainly didn't think Ollie was the Green Arrow anymore.

Suddenly, a book flew over his head.

"Hey! Asshole!"

Clark's jaw dropped as he saw Oliver approach him angrily, "What? What did I do?"

"You kissed..." Oliver threw another book,"...my girlfriend, Clark! _That's_ what you did!"

"But...but...She kissed me, Ollie! She was on me before I could react!"

Oliver let out a sarcastic laugh, "You have super-speed, Clark! She can't _be on you_ before you can react!"

"She surprised me! She thought that _I_...was _you_..._remember_?"

He rolled his eyes, "Oh come on, Clark. Like you didn't enjoy it? Not even a little bit?"

"Of course not! It's...it was...Oliver, it was _Lois_," he replied with a grimace. Trying his best to sell his _awesome_ kiss with Lois as a displeasure.

This only caused Oliver to throw a remote control over Clark's head that he narrowly dodged. "What now?"

"Do you have to make it sound like she's a horse or something? That's my girlfriend!"

Clark groaned, "Of course she's not a horse! She's very pretty!" Oliver glared at him. "But not...not my kind...she's pretty like a...like a sister!" Oliver let out a heavy sigh but continued to glare. "Come on, Ollie. You know that I wouldn't do something like that to you."

Oliver let out another sigh, doing his best to keep looking angry.

"I know..." he finally admitted, "...you're too _Clark Kent_ for that. But anybody else, and I'd be making kryptonite arrows by now, got it?"

Clark nodded, "Of course."

"And if you do it again, I'm going to kick your ass. I don't care how fast you can run or how hard you can hit, got it?"

"Trust me, Oliver. There won't be a next time. My days of kissing Lois Lane are behind me. _Way_ behind me."

If only Clark could convince _himself_ as well as he could convince Oliver.

"They better be, Kent."

Clark held up his hands, "They are."

With a huff, Oliver walked back towards his desk. Clark let out a sigh and leaned against the railing. He couldn't help but let his mind drift. A wide grin spread across his face as he remembered the kiss, his cheeks grew red and warm as he recalled her lips-

"Hey! What the hell are you smiling about?"

Throwing his arms in the air, Clark let out a laugh. "Nothing!"

_Oh, but it was most definitely not nothing..._

**_three years later..._**

_Clark paced around Watchtower. '__What do I want? I know what I want. But what if that's not what Lois wants? What if-_'

_"What are you still doing here?" _

_He turned to see Oliver standing in the entrance. "What do you mean?"_

_Ollie smirked, "I would've thought after my date from hell with Lois that you'd be sweeping her off her feet by now."_

"I'm afraid that I'm not as adept at sweeping girls off their feet as you are, Ollie."

The blonde quirked his head with a shrug, "Then I guess it's a good thing that Lois likes bumbling farm boys then."

Clark's head shot up. A small grin played at his face.

"Look, I'm not going to speak for Lois...because she'd sock me," he laughed. "But we've all known for a while now that Lois Lane...and Clark Kent...were a lot more important to each other than they'd like to admit. She's waiting for you, Clark. She's always been waiting for you."

"Says the guy who tried to put the moves on her last night," retorted Clark.

Oliver grimaced, "What can I say? She's a great girl. But you know how it is. Even three years later, payback is a bitch, Clark."

A laugh emerged from Clark as he recalled stealing a kiss from Lois when she thought he was Oliver.

"Now get off your brooding ass, and go give her a real first kiss. I mean seriously, Clark, she doesn't even know you two've _already_ had a first kiss."

Clark smiled and nodded, blurring off to the Daily Planet to tell Lois exactly what she meant to him. Oliver stood alone in Watchtower.

"Ok...hopefully she kisses him into a good enough mood that he doesn't kill me for trying to put the moves on her," he mumbled.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well? hahaha. What did you think? haha. I was wondering how Oliver took the whole Lois/Clark lip lock scene from '_Hydro_' between doing some research for my '_Inquisitor_' chapter and a future chapter that references '_Siren_', where Ollie is clearly still bitter about the kiss, haha. This is where I went with it, just because I don't think we have enough jealousy on a show where everyone has dated everyone, hahaha.

Also, I know that someone will probably say, "_But Clark admits that he wasn't expecting to kiss Lois in Kandor_", so here is my response: shhhhh! haha. I like the way this coming back together! And it makes my title reference work! hahaha. So shhhhhhh! And besides, just because Ollie says something, it doesn't mean that Clark is planning on doing it! haha. And besides, Oliver was still worried Clark was going to kill him '_Kandor_', so it works! hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _I'm not sure, it's going to have to be a surprise!_


	125. Pink K

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - I think you'll like Oliver in this one even better, hahaha.

**_ColorfulScribbles_** - Haha, thanks!

_**alexindigo**_ - I hadn't thought about that moment between Lucy/Clark/Lois, but now that I have, I feel even better about that bit, haha. And yeah, I know it was probably pushing it, but I like to imagine Oliver being supportive of Clark and Lois. Especially after he declared in '_Kandor_' that he'd always have Clark's back, that was a big moment to me in their relationship. And of course, his big push in '_Salvation_' to make Clark talk to Lois was great too!

Oh, I wanted her in the very beginning, haha. I was like, "Wait, I kind of figured Lois Lane would show up as a new transfer student by the end of the first episode, what the-", haha. I mean, if you can have Lex Luthor from Day 1, don't tell me I can't have my Lois (and Clois!), hahaha.

What happened is Lois figured out who Clark really was, and then he kind of accidentally revealed himself to be Superman later on. And with that, they had their first night together. He erased her memory at the very end, hence why she didn't remember in Superman Returns, and then she got pushed out of the big picture for the final two movies as Lana came back into play. (Mental Ugh, haha). Though Annette O'Toole was great! haha.

Awww, you loved 'League' that much? haha. I'm so glad to hear you say that! It's one of my favorites too!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, I'm so scared to sleep now! hahaha. I was worried for a few minutes there, and then I was like, "This better be Clois's moment to shine or I'm kicking some ass!" haha. Luckily, Clark finally laid a legit kiss on Lois, and the rest has been history!

**_clarkfan325_** - Don't they have the best conversations on the show? I love them because Oliver isn't afraid to call out Clark, and sometimes, that's just what Clark needs to see the right thing to do. Oliver isn't perfect by any stretch, but he's making Clark a better hero all the time.

_**Katlynne**_ - Of all the suggestions I've heard so far, I think he might be my favorite. I goggled "Hugh Laurie Cigar", and there was one picture that just made me go, "Yeah...I can roll with that..." haha. But Zack Snyder's current casting trend probably means it will be Jeff Bridges or something. Just another big name with some credits behind them. I love Kevin Costner, Diane Lane, and Amy Adams, but geeze, how many big names you need, Zack? haha.

Nathan Fillion was my long standing choice for Hal Jordan, and Stana Katic is still my choice for Talia al Ghul if the character makes it into 'the Dark Knight Rises'. I love Nathan for anything though, so that's pretty unfair, haha. He and Molly C Quinn are my current choices for Commissioner Gordon and Barbara Gordon if they reboot Batman like they say they will. And oh no, *ducks!*, hahaha.

Of course he threw a remote! hahaha. Who hasn't thrown a remote in their day? It's like the most perfect throwing object since the Ninja Star, haha. I just hear "I got sunshine...on a cloudy day" playing in Clark's head in that moment, hahaha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Haha, I can already hear the _pings_ on my phone, "You have a new PM," hahaha.

I think that in that chapter, if anything, Lana was almost feeling sorry for Lois and looking down on her for thinking that Lois knew Clark the way that she thought she did. Of course, that's just me adding bad intentions to Lana because I'm super biased, hahaha. I have a couple short drabbles that I think I'm going to post as a new story sometime soon, and I can totally see those ideas playing up on there! haha. You've done it again! hahaha.

The thing with the jealousy bit, is that you end up with the Jackie situation most of the time. And by the Jackie situation, I mean Mila Kunis' character on That 70's Show, where she dated three of the four main guys, haha. Hyde, Kelso, and Fez all dated Jackie, and that's just crazy. Look at Lois, she dated Oliver and Clark, whom Chloe (kind of with Clark) both dated as well, haha. It's just kind of crazy. It's like musical chairs, haha. Musical laps? haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked them! And yeah, I wish Clark was a little more mischievous sometimes, haha. Kind of how he was in Season 4-ish. I agree with you about Clark having to write Superman because he just couldn't praise himself, he's not that kind of guy. I can understand why Lana wanted to know so bad, and it really became more about him telling her than her actually knowing the secret, but she was a mess, haha.

_**IlleanaElise22**_ - I'm glad that you like it so much! haha. And you're right, I'd rather hear from you now than never at all! haha. I'm glad that you've been able to enjoy these chapters, and I hope you'll enjoy the ones that I write in the future! Thanks!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, BoJo, Bara, Claliver? hahahaha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #125, Pink Kryptonite

**Author's Note:** An infamous panel from the comics revealed what Pink Kryptonite does, and I just couldn't help myself, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Lois-"

"Just a second, Kara," interrupted Lois, holding up her hand. "Go on, Ollie."

Kara shook her head with a laugh, "I really think-"

"Really, I just have to get these last few quotes for my piece."

Oliver popped up on the balls of his feet, "I quit being the Green Arrow." Kara frowned. "Well, at least that's what I'm telling the public."

"You should see his fake goatee he's going to start using," snorted Lois.

"Hey!"

Kara stifled a laugh, "This is really import-"

"Hey guys!"

The trio turned to see Clark Kent standing in the door way, a goofy smile playing across his face.

"Seriously? Is this interrupt Lois Lane Day in the Kent Family? What...what are you wearing, Smallville?"

Clark grinned and squeeze his thighs, "Do you like them? I saw this guy wearing a pair just like them and I thought they were fabulous!"

"Did he just say _fabulous_?"

"Oh my god! Ollie! I didn't even see you back there!"

The trio simultaneously titled their heads to the left while fixing a funny look on him. Kara sighed, "He ran into some pink kryptonite earlier."

Lois and Oliver turned to look at Kara, "What's pink kryptonite?"

"It's uh..." Kara bounced her head from side-to-side, "It kind of...You know what? You really don't want to know."

In a blur, Clark was standing next to Oliver and rubbing the fabric of Oliver's vest.

"Ollie, did I ever tell you how _smashing_ you look in this? What's it made out of? Silk?

A look of panic spread across Oliver's face. "I wanna know. I wanna know bad. Please? Please tell me? I really wanna know."

"Lois? The window treatment you've put together in here? It's simply fabulous. Fabulous!"

Oliver gave Lois a stressed look before mouthing, "_Fabulous?_"

At the Kent Farm, Bart Allen was struggling to picture it. "Wait...so you're saying...Clark is...no way."

"I'm telling you! He was coming onto me!"

Bart rolled his eyes, "Boyscout has always been a brunette kind of guy. Tough luck, Blondie."

Jo'an chomped down on her fries, "Sorry, Uncle Ollie. I don't see it."

"What? What the hell...what the hell is that supposed to mean? Chloe, tell them!" gasped Oliver. Chloe didn't even look away from her laptop, she just shook her head with a smirk. Her husband was so vain sometimes. "Joey, you don't think that I could get your dad?"

"Why would you want to?" asked Jo'an with a furrowed brow.

Oliver scoffed, "That's not the point! The point is that if I wanted to, I could, right?"

"But why would you want to?"

"That's not-"

"Why-"

Oliver heard the door open, "Lois! Tell your daughter that if I wanted to...I could totally get Clark."

Lois walked right past him and into the kitchen, "Smallville is a brunette man. Don't flatter yourself."

Bart snickered and looked at his girlfriend, "Babe, he isn't actually-"

"Yeah. He is. It's bad."

He grimaced as Kara followed Lois into the kitchen. "Lois? Are you ok?"

"Uh...no? I'm kind of freaking out here. My husband doesn't want to kiss me. He wants to kiss Ollie. And uh...I don't know what to tell you, Kara, but it _kinda_ makes me wanna kill him. What the hell am I supposed to do? My husband is gay!"

Kara clenched her eyes shut to brace herself in the event that Lois exploded, which she was worried Lois might given how red her face was.

"I told him to go to the Fortress...maybe Jor-El will change him back to normal?"

Lois groaned, "You know, the first time I met the guy, I yelled at him. Now he's gunna know I made him gay. It's no wonder he's so cold to me."

Kara giggled, Lois frowned. "You called him cold...he's an ice fortress...get it?"

Lois was not amused, "Yeah. I got it."

"Besides, I asked Bruce to jump him with some green kryptonite. If Jor-El doesn't change him back, I think that might work."

Lois dropped her head onto the table with a thud, mumbling something about how she hated this town.

"Mom?"

Propping her head up, she looked at her daughter in the doorway. Her face told Jo'an to continue.

"If Dad is going to be all girly, doesn't that mean I can finally go to that Justin Bieber Jr concert next month?"

"What?"

Jo'an rolled her eyes, her mom was _sooooo_ forgetful. "Dad made up a disaster when I asked him, Bobo said that only _girls_ like Justin Bieber Jr. And since you said that you would rather go to a hair salon with Lex Luthor, I was hoping that since Dad is going to be girly now, he can take me."

Lois stared at her daughter for several minutes. Jo'an met her stare, "Well?"

"Tell Ollie that he has to take you."

Jo'an frowned, "He's not going to want to-"

"Tell him if he doesn't, I'm going to tell everyone about our night at the Fortune Casino."

Nodding slowly, not understanding what her mother was talking about, Jo'an walked back towards the living room, "Uncle Ollie?"

"Yeah, Joey?"

"What's the Fortune Casino?"

Lois could hear Oliver spitting out his drink all the way in the kitchen. She turned to see Kara's judgmental look, Lois threw her arms in the air.

"He shouldn't steal my husband!"

"He didn't try, Lois."

"Like I care about the truth or being reasonable at a time like this?"

Suddenly, there was someone stomping up the stairs of the front porch. Lois and Kara ran into the living room to see who it was.

The door swung open, and Clark Kent stood in the doorway. All the eyes were on him. "Overloaded on some Green-K. I'm better now. And we are never talking about this again." He stomped into the kitchen, doing his best to avoid meeting eyes with anyone else in the room.

Lois snorted, "Yeah, that's definitely _not_ going to happen."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Haha, well, how was that? hahaha. Ok, for those of you that haven't seen it before, you have to check it out. Google Pink Kryptonite and it's gotta be in the first or third row, you see Supergirl talking to Lois and Superman talking to Jimmy. It's epic! hahaha.

So, about this chapter, I really just wanted to do something funny and fun. I know there wasn't much Clark in this one, and that's because all the lines that popped into my head were probably pretty offensive, haha. Playing into a lot of stereotypes there and I certainly didn't want to come across like I was saying that being gay was anything bad, just that Clark is normally a very happy straight man with a wife and a child, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm still not really sure, I wrote this one on the spot last night and I'll probably do the same tomorrow. I'll surprise you! haha.


	126. Smallville, CK

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks! haha.

**_superbunnydude_** - No, you guys rock! haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Why does that make me imagine a bedazzeled Superman Shield? hahahaha. And yes. Bruce is going to give Oliver hell over this because I have a chapter coming up where we see how Clark was changed back, haha. Bruce is..._extremely_...present for it, hahahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - Hahaha, I missed BoJo too. I'm thinking that Clark will be jumping through hoops for a great deal of time before he stops hearing about this one, haha. This is one of those moments that people think about and accidentally laugh at your funeral, haha. It just says with you! hahaha.

And yeah, originally it was just Beiber, but then I thought, "We are talking about like fifteen years from now," haha. Beiber won't be around in fifteen years, oh god...will he? hahaha. My love affair with Annette O'Toole began with "IT" years and years ago, and has only grown since then. I'm glad that you liked 'League' so much, I'll be having everyone post their favorite chapter for a bit for the Finale, so that's good to know.

I usually write the chapters a day or two before they get posted, but the last few chapters have been written like a couple hours before I post them. I've just been crazy busy with work and everything, but I've got a few days of freedom coming up, so I'll catch up, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Hahahaha, oh yeah, Pink Kryptonite has some extremely interest effects, hahaha. I'm glad that Jo'an was such a hit for you! haha. I hadn't actually planned to have her in the chapter at first, but I missed her, so I decided to bring her back for a bit, haha.

Well, I was thinking about all the potential for this to be blackmail for the group, and it made me think, "what do each of them have that they can be blackmailed over?" for a bit in a future chapter, and once I remembered the Fortune Casino thing, I had to write it! hahaha. I loved that episode, and while there weren't _many_ drunk Clois scenes, that one spot where Clark talked to the camera was all I needed, haha.

And once again, I think you just wrote a whole chapter for me right there, hahaha."Fine. No sex."

Lois looked shocked, "Wha...wha...what?" hahahahaha.

**_A,sky_** - Well, I'm glad to hear it at least made you laugh? haha.

_**IlleanaElise22**_ - There's gotta be one for almost every color, I think. They don't all work the same way that they do on the show. I know that Red-K is very different in the comics, and usually had a different effect each time. Sometimes it maxed out his powers until they were uncontrollable.

You're going to get to see Bruce and Clark's interaction, haha, and just the stuff I've got off the top of my head, it's going to be just as funny, if not more so than the Pink-K chapter was, hahaha. And yes, it will end with Bruce telling his tale to the JLA, much to Oliver's displeasure, hahaha.

**_NeverSayNever95_** - Hahaha, "Baby, baby, baby, ooooooooooh baby," chanted Clark, hahahaha. I think that's funny too because it's like, "Why are we even talking about this?" hahahaha. It's crazy! haha. And yes, Lois is going to use it against him in the future, haha.

_**Blank**_ - Emil is one of my favorites as well, I wish I found more spots for him! haha. The hard part about the way I write is that the characters are usually dictated by what pops into my head, which usually begins with a line and then grows from there. As much as I love Emil, unless I have an idea that takes place at the hospital or requires some sort of medical advice, I really don't think of him too often for a chapter.

Yeah, Lois is normally scary, then you add on her giving birth? haha. She's going to kill some folk, haha. The explanation of the name is all thanks to mygyps17, so all the credit goes to her for Jo'an and all Jo'an related stuff, but I'm glad that you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12, with contributions from LoisNClark4Ever and Katlynne,aka LoisClarkNLove, see below...

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Lollie, mentions of Clana, mentions of Lexana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #126, Smallville (the Person)

**Author's Note:** Alright, this one is the sequel to Chapter #95, the Blur. Enjoy!

* * *

"'k, 'allville. Spill it," Lois commanded, her mouth filled with hotdog as they walked out of the Monster Truck Rally.

Clark laughed, this was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The woman who talked with her mouth full.

"Are you sure this is the best place to-"

"Then let's take a walk in that park over there," she gestured.

"Lois-"

"Smallville."

He let out a sigh as they turned towards the park, "Where do you want me to start?"

"Uh, the beginning? Duh?"

Clark laughed, "Of course. Well, you showed up at the farm, and you were uh...you dressed...well, it was an interesting outfit."

"What was so interesting about it?"

He smirked, "Uh...well, I'm pretty sure that the skirt was painted on, and the top...well, I'm never going to forget that top."

Lois glared at him, "I was on something, if you remember? I wasn't being myself?"

"I don't know, Lois. I've seen you wear some pretty interesting things before...Lassie."

She laughed hard, "Oh, so _that_ costume's burned into your memory, huh?"

He reached over and grabbed her hand, "Forever and ever."

Lois turned to look away so that he couldn't see the blush creeping up her cheeks. He still noticed.

"Then what happened?"

Clark sighed, "Well, I was worried about you, so I went to talk to Chloe at the Planet. You caught up with me. You threw me in a phonebooth."

"Ok, don't even."

"What?"

"Smallville, you're the Blur," he looked around to make sure no one heard her. "Nobody can throw you anywhere. You totally went in willingly."

Clark's jaw dropped open a bit, "It's not like I could've revealed my powers to you!"

"Uh huh, keep going."

He let out a huff, "I ended up getting infected when you kissed me-"

"Which you obviously did willingly."

He continued like he hadn't heard her. "We ended up going upstairs to one of the offices, and uh...well, things got heated."

She smirked, "Heated?"

"Yeah, well, and then you realized that we'd kissed before and-"

"What?"

Clark froze. Gulp. "Huh?"

"You just said that _I_ realized that _we'd_ kissed before."

"Uh...I did?"

Lois glared. "Yes. You did."

"Oh...well...we kind of...uh...we kind of kissed before that..."

She gave him a funny look, "No, we didn't."

"We kind of did."

"When?"

"When what?"

Lois let out a huff, "When did we kiss?"

Clark looked like a fish out of water, mouth hanging open...no words coming out.

"I'm waiting, Smallville."

"Well...it's _really_ kind of a funny story," he chuckled.

She didn't look amused.

"You see...you kind of...uh...suspected? Oliver? Of uh...being the Green Arrow? And uh..."

Lois nodded slowly, her eyes growing wider with each nod, "Wait! That was you! You were the Green Arrow! You son of a-" She unleashed a fury of punches into his arm, "Why-" Punch. "didn't-" Punch. "you-" Punch. "tell-" Punch. "me?" Punch.

"Why would I tell you when the whole point of being Green Arrow was to protect Ollie's secret?"

"Because I said so!"

"But that-"

"Just tell me the rest of the damn story, Smallville."

Clark let out a groan, "Do I have to?"

Her face told him that he did. "Uh well, I kind of...well...I don't want to say that I was jealous-"

"But you were."

Clark made a sour face, "Maybe...I was just a little..._jealous_...of your view of Oliver. So...I kind of showed you my powers."

"Did you run really fast?"

"We jumped from the roof of the Planet onto the roof at Queen Tower."

Lois made a face, "We did what?"

"Yeah. It was kind of like we were flying."

They shared equal expressions of wonder as Lois imagined and Clark remembered the night in question. "Then what?"

Gulp.

"We uh...well...we uh...we did some stuff...uh...lots of stuff...at Oliver's place."

Lois frowned, "What kind of stuff?"

A bead of sweat dripped down the side of Clark's temple, "Uh..."

Her frown intensified, "Smallville...what did we do at Ollie's place?"

"Well...uh...just stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

"Personal...stuff."

"What kind of _personal_ stuff?"

Gulp.

"You know..."

"I don't know."

Clark twitched nervously, "Uh...well...there was kissing..." He saw her eyes pop open wide. "and uh..."

"There was more?"

"Uh...yeah. There was...uh...more."

"What kind of more?"

"There was...clothes...ripping."

Her jaw dropped, "I was wondering what happened to that top!"

"Yeah...well...I kind ripped open."

Lois chuckled, "Awww, did little Clarkie get a little impatient with all them little buttons?"

Clark laughed, "You were a little eager yourself, Lois."

"Yeah, well, keep on with the story, Smallville. Chop, chop."

"Well, I caught a glimpse of your invitation to Lex and Lana's rehearsal dinner, so we decided to crash it."

Lois smirked, "Sounds like something I would wanna do."

Clark suddenly looked a little less nervous, and a lot less amused by their conversation. Lois noticed that. "What's wrong? What happened next?"

He grimaced, "We showed up...I tried to leave with Lana."

"Oh."

"You tried to stop me...you said that she was my past, and that you were my future. I told you that this was the present. I left with Lana."

Lois looked down at the ground, "Oh."

He didn't know what to say. This wasn't exactly the way that he wanted this conversation to go. He reached out for Lois's hand.

"I know what I did was wrong, Lois. I'm not going to pretend like it was being on Red-K...or that I wasn't myself...because I was," Lois nodded slowly with a disappointed expression. "But that was then. And this is now. Lana will always be an important chapter in my life, but my story...any story...isn't defined by any one chapter. And my life..._my story_...is all you from here on out. I love you, Lois. You're the one. You'll _always_...be the one."

She looked up with tears in her eyes, "Oh...Smallville..."

Lois reached across and pressed her lips to his for a sweet kiss that seemed to last a lifetime. When she ran out of air, they pulled back with their foreheads resting on one another's. Her breaths long and deep, she cupped his face and looked him dead in the eyes.

"I love you, Clark," she told him, giving him a quick peck on the lips. "But if you ever leave me like that again...I'm going to kill you."

He grinned at the smirk on her face, "Don't worry, Lois. I'm not going anywhere, not without you."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to cover the '_Crimson_' talk and LoisNClark4Ever gave me the idea that Lois might not react all that great to the Lana bit, so I wanted to put together a heart felt ending to a fun talk about the pre-crashing-Lex-and-Lana's-dinner pieces. Katlynne (aka LoisClarkNLove) gave me the idea to add the Green Arrow bit in for some more fun! haha. So, all in all, this one was a team effort! haha.

I wanted to talk some more about Clark's origins, but this got so long with just the '_Crimson'_ talk, that I'll write it into another chapter that probably takes place at or right before the actual Monster Truck Rally. Originally, I set this one at the Rally, but I thought it'd be too loud to talk, haha. I don't know if any of you have been to one (I haven't), but the snow machine races I went to as a kid were very, very loud and that was all outdoors.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I wish I had a more definitive answer! haha. The last few have been written on the fly because I've been behind! haha. I honestly don't know what it will be, but if I had to guess, I'd say it will be '_Whitney Fordman_', but no promises! haha.


	127. Whitney

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm not sure that I should be providing drugs...ah, what the heck, what's a future? hahaha. I'm glad you liked it!

**_Meg_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it! I can just picture the look on her face, haha. There are a lot of moments that I wish we had seen on the show, but I guess that's why I've got stuff to write on here, haha. I can't complain too much.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I'm not even sure she knows yet, haha. I can't think of anything they've said to imply she does, but like I was telling Meg, that's just more goodness for me to write about! haha.

**_LoisNCLark4Ever_** - Haha, I need to start appreciating you guys more! You two have been so good to me! haha. I'm sure that Clark "shows" her everyday (er...morning? night? supplies closet visit? hahaha), and I'm sure he enjoys it _very_ much, haha.

Awww, I'm glad that his speech hit such a soft spot! haha. I really wanted to have him say something that said it all, and I felt pretty good about his speech. It makes me all kinds of giddy to hear you liked it so much! And yeah, even though Lois supposedly was going to fall in love with the first person she sets eyes on, I'm gunna say it was her real feelings coming out ala Clark, haha.

The reason they kicked Margot Kidder to the back burner was because she stood up for Richard Donner when they canned him, and it was a big ole drama case with the studio that led to her being a not-so-well-liked actress on the Superman set. Kidder has always been a very outspoken person, and it pretty much cost Kidder her job as Lois Lane. At least, that's my recollection of it. And yeah, it would have been great to see those three people in a room. Even Tom Welling talked about that being a great moment for Clark.

_**A,sky**_ - And Katlynne! haha. And aww, I feel oh so pretty when you say things like that! hahaha.

**_alexindigo_** - Yeah, I re-watched '_Crimson_' so that I got all the little bit in there, and I had to watch it a second time because I got totally distracted and forgot to write anything down, hahaha. Lois was hot, haha. I'm glad that you liked it so much! haha. I wanted to have Clark give her a speech that covered all the bases and really hit home, and it sounds like it did! Thanks!

Haha, I had to come up with someone that none of the guys would want to see! hahaha. I absolutely love IT, it's one of my all time favorite books and the movie was great! I wish they'd remake it and do it justice with a much more gory, horrific Pennywise though. I would die to see that! haha. I've never been afraid of clowns, but I definitely hate spiders! haha.

I LOVED Booster! All the bumbling Clark moments made me so happy! But the big moment on the night was the Lex Luthor preview and I have to tell you, I was screaming like a little girl at a Justin Beiber concert when that came on!

And nope, no Lana in this one! haha. Just mentions of her.

_**sasslady**_ - I tried to be fair to all the Clana fans and to Lana in general. While most of us Clois-ers hate her guts because she came between Lois and Clark for so long, we should at least admit that she was a sweet girl and that she definitely had her role in Clark's life and what not. But at the same time, Lana is indeed the past and Lois is the future, get on it Clark! hahaha.

And I had to go there! haha. I'm just glad that I didn't get anyone wanting to cut off my head! hahaha.

**_IlleanaElise22_** - Aww, I'm glad that you liked the speech! And I think there will be at least one more chapter in the future where we see Clark closing the book on Lana for sure, and it'll probably be the prequel to 'Picking Lois'.

I agree, Red-K is the most fun and Green-K is always the classic kryptonite. The rest of them are really kind of just, "how can we make things interesting this week?" kind of kryptonites. They don't have a lot of substance or make a lot of sense.

_**Addict272**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! And I hope you'll like the future ones! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Whitney/Lana (kind of), mentions of Clana (kind of) , foreshadowing of Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #127, Whitney Fordman

**Author's Note:** Takes place sometime between the end of Season 1 and Season 2's '_Visage_'. Enjoy!

* * *

Whitney sat in the mess hall, his thumb traces the curve of Lana Lang's cheek. He let out a sigh.

"Alright! That's it!"

He looked over to see a fiery blonde woman stomping his way. "Excuse me?"

She gave him a '_don't-even-look_', "I've been sitting over there, trying to eat my mashed potatoes, and all I can hear is your damn _sighing_."

"Well, I'm sorry if I-"

"Don't start. I can't stand to hear someone brood. Or mope. Or any other kind of whining. Just tell me what's wrong, and I'll make it better."

"I don't even know who you are."

"Lois. Lois Lane. Now spit it out."

Whitney chuckled, "I just miss my family and friends back home."

Lois eyed the picture in his hand, "And your girlfriend by the looks of it?"

"Yeah."

"Well...that sucks. But you gotta believe you made this choice for a reason. And I'm sure she's very proud of you."

Whitney sighed and nodded, "Yeah. I just miss her, you know?" Lois nodded with a sad smile. "The feel of her touch. The smell of her hair. The-"

"Ugh."

He snapped out of his haze, "What?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "All that...lovey...dovey stuff! You're going to make me sick! It's all just so...so...ugh!"

Whitney let out a laugh, "And what exactly would you prefer?"

"I don't know...but if I was going to fall in love with somebody...it should be exciting. And...thrilling. He should challenge me, make it fun. Who wants someone that's just like they are? I'd want someone that can disagree with me and fight me head on about it. I should want to kiss him one minute, and kill him the next!"

He frowned and laughed, "Lois, that's insane. That sounds..._completely_ dysfunctional ."

She clicked her tongue, "If it's crazy to want a guy that's fun, then I guess you better fit me for a straight jacket, Kid."

"Turn around, I'll get your size."

Lois rolled her eyes, "It's going to take more than that to cop a feel on Lois Lane, Private."

It was Whitney's turn to roll his eyes, "I don't need to cop a feel. I've got a girl back home, and she's the only girl for me."

"Yeah? You think she's going to wait for you?"

He nodded, "I think so."

Lois grimaced, "I'll tell you what, Kid, in my experience? If she's as great as you think she is, I'm sure someone else is going to notice it too. Your love that strong?"

"I really think it is," he replied with confidence.

She nodded with a satisfied smirk, "Well, in that case, I hope you two find your way back to each other safe and sound."

Whitney smiled warmly, "I'll be just fine, and I'm sure that Clark is looking after her. He always did," he laughed.

"What's that supposed to mean?

Whitney shrugged, "He's always looked after her. Probably because he's always had a thing for her."

Lois frowned, "This Clark guy sounds like a real tool." Whitney looked at her confused. "Scamming on your girl? Come on, how low can you go?"

Whitney let out a laugh. "Nah...Clark is a super guy. And it's not like I can blame him for falling for her."

"Oh god, don't break out into song now, Private. Kids today, always thinking they found their soulmate."

He smiled, "You don't believe in having a soulmate?"

"Look, Kid. I'm all about romance and all, but one guy? Forever? That's a long time."

"I don't know Lois, you seem charming enough...in your own way," he laughed. "I'm sure you're going to make some guy very..._happy_...someday."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Yeah right. I'm probably going to end up with some tool like this Clark guy."

"I think you'd be pretty lucky to end up with a guy like Clark."

She let out a cold laugh, "Oh yeah, and I'm going to be some famous journalist someday." Whitney frowned. "My cousin is really into journalism, she's always on my case that I should use some of my passion as a reporter, but I can't spell to save my life so it's whatever," she explained with a wave.

He gave an amused chuckle, "And give up your career as a couples therapist?"

Before Lois could reply, a voice called her over the speaker system, "_Lois Lane, please meet General Lane at his office. Lois Lane, please meet General Lane at his office._"

"Well, as much as I'd like to hear the rest of your sappy love story," she gave him a cheeky smile, "I've got an appointment with Daddy."

Lois was already out the door when Whitney blurted, "Wait, Lane? As in the General Lane's daughter?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I wanted to have a chapter for every main character, and yes, that means we will see Davis Bloome, Major Zod (cough_andGeneral_cough, haha), and Jason Teague at some point. So that was my version of the Whitney chapter.

So, the way I'm looking at this one, wherever Whitney was sent off to when he joined the Marines, Lois and the General just happened to be there too. I left out where Whitney was from and all the other names besides Clark (which would have been common enough that she wouldn't have even thought about it) so that we wouldn't have a, "How come Lois didn't remember talking about these people with Whitney when she came to Smallville?" situation going on. I don't know, it was tough to come up with something that I could wrap around to Lois, because well...Lois wasn't around when Whitney was. So this is what I came up with and I hope you guys liked it!

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking '_St. Patricks Day_', but it could be a couple other ones, but I'm feeling '_St. Patties Day_' right now, haha.


	128. St Patricks Day

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I considered going that route, but I think murder is frowned upon at a military base? haha. And yeah, at first, I had him kind of resign himself to the notion that Clark and Lana would get together, but he clearly thought he was still going to be with Lana during 'Visage', so I had to change it up a little bit. It made it kind of sad for those of us that know what will really happen down the road.

And yes! I loved Eric Martsolf! He did a great job portraying the cocky Booster Gold, though he really does become a true hero (unlike Ultraman, haha, yes, I am still bitter about it! haha). Booster is a great character, though his best friend was Ted Kord, not Jaime Reyes. Not that I minded, Smallville seems to like to leap frog characters to their more younger counterparts like having Bart Allen instead of either Barry Allen or Wally West.

I loved all the Clois moments in this one, and having her wear those glasses, I felt like I was going to die! haha. Having Tom Welling finally be the bumbling, stumbling, mild mannered reporter was one of the highlights of the season for me. I can't believe he won't be Superman in Man of Steel! haha. And while they won't be working in the basement together for now, I think Perry White might change that when he comes back! haha. At least I hope so!

Breaking In is quickly becoming one of my favorite shows, and Michael Rosenbaum is killing it on there! You have to watch it! And I can't wait to have Lex back on Smallville because he is going to be epic! Oh boy, I cannot wait to see what happens!

**_A,sky_** - Yeah, it's sad because we know what really happens. :(

_**sasslady**_ - What I really wonder is how would Lana have turned out if Whitney had never left? She was changed forever after that, and maybe she was looking for a hero because of the hero she lost? Who knows. All I know is that for a guy who was a jerk at the start of the season, I liked Whitney by the end.

**_h-g-j-l-e-rk_** - Haha, that she does!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, I don't think you have to look any further than "how were the first two movies?" and "how were the last two movies?" to really tell the story on whether Lois Lane belongs with Superman. It's just something you don't mess with, and that's why the third and fourth movies choked. At least that's always been my opinion, haha. You don't take the hot fudge away from the halibut! hahaha.

I've been waiting a long time for Clark Kent to be the mild mannered reporter we know and love, and Tom Welling nailed it. He's got a few more steps til he gets to the classic Clark Kent, but if this is as far as he goes, I'll be more than happy. He did a great job. I think we'll get the wedding in the first part. I think that the writers and the producers know that's what the fans want to see, and I think it will happen, haha. I don't think it's asking too much.

I'm so conflicted with the finale, haha. I'm so excited to see it! But at the same time, I don't want it to end! haha. I want to see Lex back and kicking ass, but I know that his appearance marks the end of Smallville. Damn you, Zack Snyder for not keeping this going! haha. Someday someone will get the right idea and bring this group back together. I just have to believe that. Erica Durance and Michael Rosenbaum as are perfect as Lois and Lex, and Tom Welling just oozes Superman to me. Someone has to realize this at some point, right? Right? haha. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed!

Well, I'll offer this up, haha, I never told Lois where Whitney was from. And I never mentioned Lana's name. That's my only defense, haha. Unless Lois runs into Whitney again at some point and he tells her those things, I think we can get away with this, haha.

I had thought about having her run into Tina-Whitney, but that was in Season 2, so I could of lost traction with the idea, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Ah, the wonderful 'Trash' episode where Nathan gets stranded out in the middle of nowhere...naked...haha. Nudity aside, that was one of the better episodes of Firefly, haha. Though we never found out why he has that blue tattoo on his butt, haha.

hahahahahahahaha, I just pictured Pink-K involving Lex. Oh god, haha. I don't know if you've watched 'Breaking In' yet, Michael Rosenbaum's new show, but I can definitely imagine the hilarity that would ensue! hahaha. He is one of the funniest people in Hollywood and he would relish in that! haha. Well, he's back to normal for now...haha. There is always a chapter to be written about _how_ he got fixed, haha. And yes! haha. You are fabulous...just fabulous! haha.

Can you imagine all the things she can now call on him now that she knows he has superpowers? hahaha. Oh boy, haha. And yeah, I think Whitney is older than Lois, haha, but I don't think that would stop her from trying to be the big dog, haha. I'm sure that when she's in military surroundings, she feels like a big bad veteran because of all the years she's spent running around those kind of places, haha. I just couldn't help myself from picturing her trying to puff out her chest like she was this chiseled veteran and he was some baby rookie, haha. Seemed like a very Lois thing to do, haha.

_**IlleanaElise22**_ - Haha, she's got the answers to the universe! Haven't you heard? haha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, yeah, writing Lana is like walking a tight rope, haha. And I too used to wonder, "How did Oliver react in private about that kiss?" haha. That is what I'd always imagined, haha. There will only be one more Gay Superman chapter, haha, so bear with me, haha.

Yeah, I thought they'd expand upon it more. I think there was a lot of opportunity for them to talk about his origins and his powers and what not. I'll be writing a chapter that covers that since A, I haven't covered it yet, haha. And B, they didn't really show the talk on the show. She just kind of knew about it like they had talked about it earlier. I was kind of disappointed that they didn't do it, but at least now I get to! haha.

And I'm glad that you liked the speech! haha. I wanted it to be heartfelt and yet still not too sappy. And yeah, i think we're going to get pretty much every character and every spot that we've had on the show. Well, every character that was on there for more than an episode or two (and a few that were just because I liked them so much, I'm talking to you Maggie! hahaha). They're challenging prompts, so I really like that.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Dollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #128, St. Patrick's Day

**Author's Note: **Sorry about the lateness guys, I'm house sitting and I've been having some internet trouble since yesterday afternoon. Looks like it's been fixed though, those wonderful tech guys, haha. Anyways, this if for all of us that wished we got more drunken Clois during 'Fortune'! haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Lois rolled her eyes as Clark mumbled into the toilet, "Smallville, you have to lift your head if you want to talk to me."

His head popped out, eyes red with tears, "What's wrong with, Lois? Why do I feel like this?"

"Because you played a drinking game with Oliver. That's why."

Clark grimaced, "But I'm Super...Super...oh god."

His head dropped into the toilet again, causing Lois to let out a chuckle, "You're a Superman alright."

**the night before . . . .**

"I hate when you do that."

Clark frowned, "Do what?"

Lois pulled on her jacket and made her way towards the bathroom to check her hair, "When you look all smug like that."

"What? What would I have to be smug about?"

She popped back out of the bathroom with a 'give-me-a-break' eye roll, "Smug because you feel oh so proud about your ability to not get drunk."

Clark did his best to bite back a smirk. It didn't go well. "It's not my fault, Lois. It's my Kryptonian heritage."

Lois watched as Clark straightened his tie and walked into the kitchen, an evil grin spreading across her features. She shuffled quietly over to the dresser by the stairs, she checked to make sure the coast was clear. "Kryptonian heritage, huh?" she muttered, pulling out a lead box. "We'll see about that."

The couple met up with Oliver and Dinah at the Ace of Clubs, and Lois made sure to handle the first round. She watched Clark consume one, two, three, and four rum and cokes. The smug look was still plastered on his face, but he now had some red cheeks to go along with it and Lois knew it was working. She leaned across their small table towards Clark, her mouth twirling into a sinister grin, "How you doing there, Smallville?"

Clark looked up wildly, "What? Huh? Me? I'm doing just fine, Honey. Just swell."

Oliver and Dinah shot Clark unusual looks before looking over at Lois. She was grinning something fierce.

"You know, Smallville, I'm feeling lucky tonight," she told him in a confident tone.

Clark looked up from his drink with a surprised expression. "Oh yeah?" he asked with wagging eyebrows.

Lois let out a laugh and rolled her eyes, "Not for that. Well, not _yet_ anyways. How about we play a little game? A drinking game?"

He frowned, "Lois, you know I can't get drunk. You know that. I told you that. Right? I told you that?"

"Oh, you told me alright. But I think...I think it's about time we put that to the test."

Clark closed one eye to focus on Lois, "I don't think that's such a good idea, Lois. I don't want you to get sick."

Lois let out a huff, "Please, Smallville. I'm Lois Lane. I know how to drink. Go up to the bar and get some shots. Dinah? You mind helping him?"

Dinah frowned as Clark stumbled out of his seat, "Uh...sure..."

The two walked towards the bar with Clark counting how many people were at the table on his four fingers like it was a complex math equation.

Oliver leaned over to Lois, "What did you do to Clark?"

"I slipped him some Blue Kryptonite during our first round."

He looked at her in awe, "I love you."

"Yeah, yeah, save it for the Canary."

"Wait, is that...healthy? He's going to be fine right? It's just temporary?"

Lois shrugged. "I texted Emil, he said it would be fine...said to send him pictures. Clark was fine when it happened in Meeker Springs."

Oliver grinned, that was enough for him. "Works for me."

"We're back!"

Clark plopped down a thud, Oliver was sure he heard the chair's legs crack. "I couldn't count how many we needed, so we got the bottle."

Lois and Oliver exchanged smirks, "That'll get us where we're going."

Dinah rolled her eyes, having figured out the plan, "To hell?"

"Huh?" asked Clark.

"Nothing," hushed Lois. "So this game...is called quarters."

A grin etched it's way across Oliver's face, "And to play quarters, you have to bounce a quarter into the glass in the middle. Whoever wins, get's to pick the person who has to drink the shot. Make sense?"

Clark rolled his eyes, "It sounds easy enough for Superman, Ollie."

Ollie grinned, "I was hoping you'd say that, how about we got first?"

Clark shrugged, "Bring it on, Robin Hood."

Sliding a quarter over to Clark, Oliver started to smirk. "On the count of three? One...two...three..."

Somehow, Clark's quarter ended up about three tables away. Oliver's quarter made it into the glass on the first try. "All you, Clark."

**five games later . . . .**

"'is game is 'o easy," slurred Clark.

Oliver and Dinah bit back fits of laughter while Lois roped her arm around Clark's neck. She hadn't had the hand-eye coordination that Dinah had.

"Kick 'eir asses, Baby," muttered Lois.

Clark looked up at her, "'ou got it!"

This time, Clark squared up against Oliver. The archer frowned at Clark's serious expression, "You ok there, Boyscout?"

"You're the one that's gunna be ok."

Oliver laughed, "What?"

**five _more_ games later . . . .**

"Where do you think they got off to?"

Dinah rolled her eyes, "Do you even have to ask?"

She pointed out onto the dance floor, where Lois and Clark were...dancing? It looked like dancing...but it so wasn't..._dancing_.

"What are they...what happened Clark's shirt?" Oliver asked as his head titled to the left.

"Judging by the...rips...in it, I'm thinking that Lois is having herself a good time."

**one round later . . . .**

The coat-closest door flung open and Lois emerged buttoning up her shirt. "Even on Blue-K...it still feels like you've got more than two hands."

"What?" Clark asked as he also emerged from the coat-closet.

"Nothing," she replied with a nervous grin. She gave him a steamy kiss to distract him.

When they parted lips, Clark kept his eyes closed and hummed. When his eyes popped open, they had a devilish spark, "I wanna go back to the farm."

Lois grinned widely at his admission, "Let's just get one last drink and we'll ditch this joint, Smallville."

Clark gave her a quick peck, "One last drink."

**after last call . . . .**

Back at the farm, Clark smiled a goofy grin, "Lois, there are butterflies dancing in my stomach."

Lois grinned right back at him, her arms roping around his neck. "Yeah? You're doing quite the number on my stomach too, Smallville."

His grin suddenly became a frown, "No...Lois...I think there really are butterflies in my stomach..."

"What? What are you talking about?"

Clark's face suddenly became very pale, "My...oh god...Lois...I think I'm going to-"

He tipped over and emptied the contents of his stomach onto her brand new shoes. Lois clenched her eyes shut and groaned.

"You just had to prove a point, didn't you, Mad Dog?" she muttered to herself.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, haha, what did you guys think? I wanted to have some fun with the idea of them both intoxicated and see what would happen, the hard part is covering an entire night of drunkness in one chapter, let alone describing it, haha. Anyways, I hope that you guys liked it, and we'll probably have another chapter in the future where we fill in some of the blank spots, haha. Just because I feel like there's so much more to tell! haha.

Also, I wanted to say sorry about our lack of an update or the bulk of the day. I am house sitting for my folks while they're out of the state, and the internet here is kind of old school, haha. It went until the tech guys could come out and (being in Alaska and all) apparently, the snow melting caused some problems with some of the wiring. But barring any sudden problems, I fully expect the next chapter to be up in a few hours like usual. Thanks for the patience!

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought! I'll try and respond to all of them before I post the next chapter! Thanks!

**Next Up:** I don't know what the title will be yet, but I will say this, it features the lovely Lucy Lane...oh I can't wait, haha.


	129. Courtney

**Review Comments:**

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, hint received! haha. I was going to write a sequel to fill in the blanks, haha, maybe now I've got my set-up!

**_IlleanaElise22_** - I think Clark is just adorable when he's drunk, haha. He's such a goofball, haha. It is pretty easy to take advantage of him if you have like half the info, haha, but I think he rarely dislikes having Lois Lane take advantage of him, haha.

And you're right! I forgot the moment! haha. What if I promise to have two kill-me-or-kiss-me moments in the sequel? haha. I too was exhausted while I was writing it, pulled a double shift at work for a friend and was absolutely beat by the time I got to my computer, haha. I can't believe I missed it! I promise to make up for it though, haha. Starting with some fun with the gang in this one!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy, Mera/AC, mentions of Tim Drake/Stephanie Brown, one-sided Courtney/Tim

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #129, Courtney Whitmore

**Author's Note: **This one is a continuation of Chapter #75's _Mera_, hope you guys like it!

* * *

_"Bobo always does what I tell him to do. Sometimes I have to give him 'the Look', but he always does what I want."_

_Mera and Lucy shared a glance, "What look?_

_Jo'an proceeded to put her hands on her hips, locked one leg in front of her, and dip her head with a wide-eyed glare. Instinctively, the two women got wide-eyed and took a couple steps back. "Here...here's a quarter. Why don't you go get some candy, Squirt?"_

_The niece frowned at her Aunts and their odd behavior, but went to the vending machine. Lucy walked closer to Mera and nudged her a bit._

_"Was it just me? Or did she look like a midget Lois just then?"_

_Mera's eyes got wide but she nodded quickly, "It was quite frightening." _

They each shivered at the memory of the little girl's look. They walked out towards the vending machines to see a blonde girl holding Jo'an.

"What the hell?" muttered Lucy, racing off towards her niece.

Mera narrowed her eyes, "Isn't that..."

"Get your hands off my niece, Blondie!"

The girl looked up to see the brunette stomping her way, and instantly, she knew this woman had to be from the Lane side of the family. Jo'an hopped out the girl's arms and stopped Lucy from pummeling the blonde girl, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, Aunt Lucy!"

"What, Squirt?" she demanded, her eyes transfixed on the girl.

"That's my Aunt Coco!"

Lucy's gaze shot down at her niece, "Aunt Coco?"

The blonde girl stuck out her hand, "I'm Courtney Whitmore. I'm a friend of Clark's."

"Lucy Lane," she looked down at Jo'an again. "And seriously, how many aunts and uncles can one kid have?"

Jo'an rolled her eyes with a giggle, "You sound just like mom!"

Lucy looked at Jo'an very, very seriously, "You take that back! You take that back right now, young lady!"

"It's nice to see you again, Courtney."

Courtney grinned, "It's good to see you too, Mera. Where's AC?"

"He is doing some work with Oliver and Bart. An all boy's day I suppose."

Lucy frowned, "Ok, Oliver works for Queen Industries and that Bart kid's only job seems to be keeping the food industry prosperous. What could either of them have to do with your husband? Actually, I don't think I even know what he does for a living."

Jo'an had to pipe up to keep them out of hot water, "Uncle AC is the best ocean navigator in the world, and uh...Uncle Ollie needed...uh...navigation."

"And how did your little _Bobo_ get involved?"

"Catering."

The trio looked up at Courtney, Lucy had an unconvinced look. "Catering?"

"Yep. Bart knows food better than anyone."

Both Mera and Jo'an snorted. Lucy rolled her eyes, "Your friends are so weird, Squirt."

"Have you met my mom and dad?" quipped the young lady with a cheeky grin.

Lucy laughed, "I guess I can't argue with that." She turned to look at Courtney, "So which one are you paired up with?"

Courtney frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Well, it seems like everybody is dating everybody in your little group. Bart and Kara, Lois and Clark, Mera and AC, Ollie and Chloe, heck, even that Mercer lady is running around with that guy with the jewelry obsession, what's his name, Squirt? The one with the ring?"

"Hal."

"Yeah, that one."

The blonde shook her head, "I'm not with anybody."

Mera snickered. Courtney looked at her with a '_don't-you-dare-look_'. Mera waved a hand, "Everyone knows how you get when Tim visits."

Lucy smirked, "Tim, huh?" She nudged Jo'an and whispered, "Which one is Tim?"

"Tim is Uncle Dick's brother."

"Adopted brother," corrected a blushing Courtney. "And I'm not..._with_...him, Mera."

"But you wish you were," corrected Mera.

"Wha...I don't...we're...we're just...you don't know what...we'd...never...he likes Stephanie anyways."

Lucy shook her head, "Who is this _Stephanie_? You want us to kick her ass?" The other three looked at Lucy with funny expressions. "What?"

"You can tell us, Aunt Coco. Uncle Tim has a lot of cool toys, I get it," commented Jo'an.

Mera nodded while Lucy grinned, "Come on, Girly. You've gotta give us something."

Courtney did her best to look steely like Carter taught her to do for interrogations, but the giggles came out anyways. "He's just so sweet!"

"I know what you mean, Jimmy is like that." Lucy paused, a grin forming, "Usually, guys just say what they think will get them into my pants, but he means every little word. And no matter how sappy...or cliche...or completely ridiculously sweet it is, I swoon every time. And Lanes don't swoon!"

Jo'an let the straw go with a _pop_, "They sure don't."

"Damn right, Squirt. Maybe that's why your folks work so well. He's just so damn cute that even when you wanna kill him, you end up kissing him."

"Mom says it neutralizes the Lane fury," nodded Jo'an.

Mera watch the two with great interest. "Orin has very attractive muscles."

All three looked at Mera with varying expressions.

Jo'an had a confused expression, '_Who cares about muscles? How fast can he run? What is his favorite food? These are the important questions, people!_'

Lucy had a kind of conflicted expression, '_AC does have nice mucles...but hey, Jimmy works out too! I mean...it's on the Wii...but that still counts!_'

Courtney simply sighed dreamily, '_Muscles..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? haha. This is part two in the trilogy, haha. I can't wait to write the next chapter, which will feature the appearance of the third and final voted member to join their little shopping trip! haha. I've already got some ideas! haha. But anyways, I hope you guys liked having Aunt Coco added to the group. One of my friends is in a sorority, and I was like, "What's a good nickname for someone named Courtney?" and she told me about how their are two girls named Courtney in their house, so they call one of the girls by Coco instead, haha. I liked it anyways, haha.

In the comics, Courtney has a crush on Tim Drake, so I incorporated that into this one. She also had a relationship with Billy Batson, so maybe I'll have that be her happy ending since I probably won't dive too much into the Robins (all four (five if you count Stephanie Brown) of them) beyond Dick Grayson. And even that is for my post-Kill-Me-or-Kiss-Me story that I have in the works, haha. It just gets too complicated timeline wise with all of them, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Probably '_Wedding Day_', but it might be '_Barry Allen_', not sure yet.


	130. Wedding Day

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I think that Lois is _always_ going to try and prove her points, haha. Not sure if she'll spike his booze anymore though, haha. I know that a lot of folks wonder about Baby #2, but to be honest, I haven't given it a lot of thought so far. I'll probably get into it at some point here just to tie up the other loose ends, but as of right now, I don't really have anything on tap. But I'll tell you what, your comments are giving me a few ideas, haha.

**_alexindigo_** - Haha, i just _knew_ that you guys were going to give me hell for not showing off more action! hahaha. And yeah, their skipping over characters is going to prove to be a challenge for the Barry Allen character that I'm going to try and cover in the next chapter, mainly because even though he used it as a pick-up line, Bart Allen really is from the future. He is Barry's grand son. Oh god, here come the headaches again, haha.

I'm expecting Clark to sit down at his desk and find the chair all lowered again, and when he's like, "what the hell?", we'll hear, "I think you might find a spot upstairs a little more comfortable." And BOOM! We'll see Perry White is standing there with Clark's name-plate in hand, "Perry?", and he'll smirk, "I think you mean Chief." hahaha. That's how I would do it if we're only going to get a little cameo.

I love writing Jo'an even though I've like totally stolen her from mygyps17, haha. And I can't wait to write the sequel!

_**A,sky**_ - I owed you from the mess up with my internet! haha. I'm glad you liked the girls!

**_clarkfan325_** - The Kryptonian Heritage speech is coming up soon, but I don't have a title for it yet, so I can't tell you what to watch for, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - She isn't a really big character, mostly a JSA character and what not. She's Supergirl's best friend, but for the most part, I can't remember many of her appearances. She's based on Geoff Johns' sister, who passed away, and Stargirl only been around for the last ten years or so.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Yeah, that's the main argument that I hear, people don't want '_Smallville: the Movie'_ instead of a Superman movie. All in all, I think you'd be hard pressed to find a better quality cast than the Smallville cast. I mean, sure, I think there's probably some better actors for certain parts out there, I'd probably recast Perry White, J'onn J'onnz, and Dinah Lance if I was given the chance (Hugh Laurie, Jon Hamm, and Amber Heard? haha), but for the most part you're talking about one of the all around best casts with Welling, Durance, and Rosenbaum playing the key trio.

I loved the phone booth scene, it took the classic scene and gave it the modern edge, which is what ought to be done with most of the Superman classics. You don't have to redesign or reimage things, just give them a more modern edge, and Smallville's done that quite well.

Haha, I didn't think anyone would mind the idea of taking advantage of Clark in the coat closet, haha. I'm glad that you liked Lucy! I recently saw her actress is something else (i can't remember for the life of me what it was!) and was very impressed with her, I wish we could see her again before the end of the show! I think she was very well cast. I like imagining her being very protective of her little niece, haha.

I'll try and check out the radio broadcast, though I doubt I'll find it, haha. Nationwide radio is hard to come by in Alaska, but I'm definitely going to mark my calendar for the Jimmy Kimmel appearance! Hopefully they'll do a bit where Tom dress up as Superman, haha. Right up Jimmy's alley!

_**IlleanaElise22**_ - Haha, I'm glad to hear I'm forgiven! I think there is a part of Lucy that is jealous, and I think we'll have a chapter where Jo'an reassures her about it. I considered having her say, "but you're my only _real_ aunt," but that seemed kind of mean to the no-bio aunts. In that particular chapter, she is nine years old, but her age is always in flex as the timeline jumps back and forth around here, haha.

mygyps17 saw Hallie Kate Eisenberg from that _Paulie_ movie, though I like the idea of Bailee Madison . To be honest, I've always pictured the girl from _Little Miss Sunshine_ and _Definitely, Maybe_ as Jo'an, her name is Abigail Breslin. She is a bit older, 15 right now, but in those movies she was the right age.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #130, Lois and Clark's Wedding Day

**Author's Note:** The way I originally mapped this out, it was one of them sappy bits, but it turned into this, which I'm happier with, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Lois? Are you in here?"

Martha peer around the door into Clark's room, well, Lois and Clark's room she had to remind herself. Even though she'd had her suspicions about the two of them for a while now, she was still getting used to the idea that this was _their_ room now. _Their_ home. She felt giddy at the thought.

"Hey Mrs. K, just down here."

Martha looked around the room, looking for where the voice came from, when she saw a pair of heels sticking out the other side of the bed. She had to bite back a laugh as she walked around the bed and saw Lois saying on the floor beside the bed, "Sweetie? Why are you laying on the floor?"

"The room was spinning," offered Lois as if it was a normal thing to be doing.

"And why is the room spinning?"

Lois rolled her head back and forth, "Oh, I don't know. Did you hear? I'm marrying Clark today."

Martha nodded and grinned, doing her best not to laugh. "Is that why all those people have been stopping by?"

"Yeah. Well, that and the fact that you're home. Everybody wants some of the famous Mrs. K cooking."

"Lois..."

She looked at Martha with a blank expression, "Yeah?"

"Are you feeling ok?"

Lois puffed out her cheeks like she was trying to keep something inside. She opened her mouth with a pop, "Not really."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm marrying Smallville today!"

Martha recoiled in surprise, frowning at her future daughter-in-law's shout. "Are you having second thoughts?"

"What? Of course not!"

Mrs. Kent shook her head and let out a laugh, "Lois, I don't understand-"

"What if I'm not...I don't know if you know this, Mrs. K, but commitment isn't really my strong suit!"

Martha had to bite her tongue to keep from snorting.

"And marriage...that's...that's _forever_. That's for real. And I...it's kind of a little bit totally freaking terrifying!"

"Lois, you don't need to worry."

She frowned at Martha, finally sitting up on the floor. "What if I'm not cut out for the susie homemaker thing? No offense, of course."

Martha smiled, "Clark doesn't expect you to be."

"But what if he wants-"

"What he wants is you. All of you. All your craziness, all of your stubbornness, all of it. He wants you, just the way you are."

Lois smiled, "How do you always know the right thing to say?"

Martha grinned, but didn't respond. She stepped over the legs laid out in front of her and looked out the window at the farm. She swore she could see herself standing there years ago. Standing there having the same panic attack that Lois was having now.

_She stood out at the fence watching the sunrise, thinking about everything that was about to happen. Thinking about who she was, where she was from, and where she was going. She remained deep and thought when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist._

_"Jonathan! You know it's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding," Martha scolded him despite her megawatt smile._

_He grinned as he pulled her close. "Who needs luck when we have all this love?" he asked as he buried his face into her neck._

_Martha rolled her eyes, "You're completely insatiable , you know that?"_

_"Says the one that talked me into meeting her in the loft last night," he teased. Martha let her jaw drop as her cheeks reddening._

_"I have no idea what you're talking about," she tried._

_"We broke the couch, Martha."_

_She clenched her eyes shut, trying not to laugh as she remembered the night before. "That couch wasn't going anywhere anyways."_

_Jonathan smiled and gave her a quick peck on the cheek, "You ready for tonight?"_

_For the first time, Martha's smile faded. Jonathan frowned, __"What's wrong?"_

_"Nothing...I mean...it's nothing."_

_"Honey..."_

_Martha looked down at the ground before looking, "Are you sure about all of this?"_

_Jonathan took a step back, "Are you...do you not..."_

_"No! I just...you know that this isn't exactly what I'm used to," she laughed, stretching her arms out in the farm's view. "I'm not a farm girl."_

_Jonathan frowned, "Does that matter?"_

_She shrugged her shoulders a bit, "Does it matter to you?"_

_He chuckled, "Not really." Martha looked surprised, so he elaborated. "Martha, I don't want to marry you so that you can be a farmer's wife. I want to marry you for the strong, caring, wonderful woman who seduced me at the University all that time ago," he laughed._

_"I did not seduce you, Jonathan Kent," she laughed._

_Jonathan grinned, "I know that you want more than this old farm, and that's fine with me. All I want is you, Martha. Just the way you are."_

_A grin formed on Martha's face as she threw herself at him, sharing a kiss with her fiancee. "That's good to hear, because if you didn't, I was going to kill you."_

_He laughed, "I think I prefer the kissing."_

Martha turned back to Lois, "Because I was once young and in love too, Lois. And I know exactly how you feel."

Lois smiled warmly as she got up and sat on the bed, patting the spot beside her, "Does it really hurt at times like this?"

"It's hard...I wish he was here to see how happy you two are together...," she tailed off, "But I know that somehow, he's watching. And I know that he's just as proud, of both of you, as I am. I know that he'd be proud to call you his daughter-in-law, he always considered you his daughter anyways."

The two women embraced, hugging each other tightly. Lois leaned back and smiled, "That's Mrs. K."

"Let's get you to the church, future Mrs. K," she smiled.

Lois let out a laugh and gave her future mother-in-law a cheeky smile, "Mrs. _Lane_-K."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? When I pictured it the first time around, I was kind of picturing as a more serious kind of chapter. But I feel like we've had plenty of those kinds of chapters, so I wanted to go for something a little lighter but I didn't want to just do a repeat of '_Washington, DC'_, so I came up with the idea to do the flashback, which honestly, I ended up pretty happy with because I always love bringing Jonathan back! haha.

I thought it was important to portray both Lois and Martha's fear as not being in love but instead that they were worried about their own place in their partner's lives, because lets face it, these two couples were absolutely written in the stars, hahaha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:**_ Barry Allen._


	131. Barry

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I think it's a Kent thing to want a fiery woman like Martha or Lois, haha, so of course they had their own game! haha. And yeah, I don't know about a hundred or two hundred more chapters, but I'll do what I can, haha.

**_jade2nightwing_** - I am super excited about it, though I thought they had said that ages ago. What I'm excited about, is that it looks like he's going to be back in the flesh because he's kind of clinging onto Martha and Clark and I'm pretty sure that's not an old scene. Earth-2 Jonathan going to cross over? God, I hope so, haha. I would absolutely be on Cloud 9 if I got to see Jonathan and Martha reunited like that!

_**svgurl410**_ - I wouldn't be so sure about Jonathan not being there. Clark's wearing a suit in the promo in that scene with Martha and Jonathan, and I can't think of any moment for that in the past, so I'm hoping that somehow, someway we see Jonathan appear at the wedding! haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Haha, I cannot wait to see those two say their "I do's" in the Finale! It's going to be amazing! haha. I'm glad that you liked that bit with her laying down like that, haha. Part of me was like, "I think it'd be such a Lois thing to do," and the other part was like, "It's gunna get dirty," haha.

In my mind, between all the similarities between Jonathan and Clark, and all the times that Martha has said that Lois reminds her of herself when she was that age, I like to think that the two relationships were dissimilar. Which for me, is both a commentary on how fun the Kents' relationship can be and how meant to be the Clois relationship is. And nope, I don't think either Martha or Lois can withstand them Kent puppy dog eyes, haha.

Most of our radio stations are local by my estimation, but we do have some nationwide stations. Though I'll be honest, I couldn't tell you what any of them are if you were to ask me, haha. As far as I know, they're all sports ones, haha. It's still in the 30's up here, but it's mostly because we've gotten a little bit of a cold snap, we were in the 40's a couple weeks ago. Most of the snow is gone, but the backyards that don't get a lot of sun still have them, haha.

Well, I think that of all the Lois Lane's, Erica Durance is by far the best. And with all the Lex Luthor's, Michael Rosenbaum is by far the best. Superman is a little unfair because for the most part, they've all been great. But I think Tom Welling has all the makings of a very good Superman, with the potential to be one of the best of 'em. So with all that in mind, I think the Smallville Trinity is the best overall without a question. And yeah! I think it was Hawaii 5-0, and I wish we got to see her and the General, but it'll be hard to complain with everyone else coming back! haha. I cannot wait to see how it all turns out!

_**meg**_ - Thanks!

_**cathy03**_ - Hahaha, I wish that we had gotten to see them more! And maybe, just maybe, we'll get some "unused footage" on the DVD, haha. I hear you about the timeline thing because I used to argue with my friends about Robin in a Batman movie and I was always a fan of Dick Grayson, some people love Tim Drake as the Boy Wonder, and now obviously there is Damiam Wayne taking up the mantle. How do you encompass those three AND Jason Todd? And Stephanie Brown? It's just not going to happen, not in a trilogy of movies or anything. It's just too much to cover in one timeline.

I thought you guys might like that bit right there, haha. Martha and Jonathan could give Lois and Clark a run for their money too, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I wanted them to be very similar and I like the idea that on some level, Lois and Clark's relationship is meant to be just like Martha and Jonathan's were. I know what you mean, I miss writing Clark sometimes in chapters like this too, but sometimes it's gotta be done, haha.

Haha, I knew that I was going to hear about it from you guys! hahaha. At least I set up stuff for your imaginations! haha. I meant that I was writing a sequel to the Courtney chapter, haha. I've already hi-jacked her star character, I can't hi-jack her story too! hahaha.

_**Katlynne**_ - He is absolutely epic in _Breaking In_, he plays this super-douche, haha. He's hilarious! I can't wait til Wednesday to see the new episode.

Heck yeah she liked to be the Boss, haha. She loves to be on top, haha, wait a minute...that might have been taken-...you know what, who am I kidding? She probably does, hahaha. I think she likes to keep the fun kinds (red and blue) around for when she wants to take advantage of Clark, haha. Whether that means bring out his Kal side or keep him from being able to get away when she is raging, haha, I'm not sure, haha.

Hahaha, I could just see the look on Lucy's face in the moment, haha. Oh boy, haha. You're excused if I can go think about Erica? hahaha. I'll give you a hint for the sequel, the next person joining the group is on the list you just gave me! hahaha.

I SAW THE PICTURE, hahaha, but you better not die on me! haha. Why does that make me picture cradling you like Lois cradles Clark during the Death of Superman? haha. And why am I the girl in this picture? hahaha. Yeah, they did give us ten years, but I'm not going to lie, I'm selfish enough to want them to give me ten more! haha. And you better be doing some writing while you're playing hermit! haha.

_**IlleanaElise22**_ - Yeah, that's kind the problem with taking a story and making it into a movie or a TV show. Everyone has their own picture of the person in their head, haha. I adored Abigail in _Little Miss Sunshine_ and _Definitely, Maybe_ because of her dialogue, so that's why I picked her.

I know how you feel about being excited yet not wanting it to be over! haha. It's kind of killing me because I want to see how it ends so badly, but the idea of not seeing Tom Welling and Erica Durance get into their weekly hijinks anymore? Man, that's just sad, haha. I hope that we'll see Martha and Lois share some more scenes in the Finale, just to see her pass the torch from one Mrs. K to another would be awesome!

Hear you loud and clear about not getting to have Jonathan back, but maybe he'll appear somehow in the Finale! I hope so!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bara, Barry/Iris

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #131, Barry Allen

**Author's Note:** This is my attempt to fix things with Barry Allen and Wally West, bear with me guys! haha. Even though Bart carried around an ID for Jay Garrick, Barry Allen, and Wally West, we would come to find out that Jay Garrick does exist in the Smallville verse, why shouldn't the others? haha.

* * *

"Uh...guys?"

Oliver and Clark turned from the monitors to see Bart standing in the doorway with a man.

"I want you guys to meet Barry, he's uh...he's looking for a spot on the team. He's fast like me. Or I'm fast like him. However, you wanna say it."

"New talent, huh? What are you calling yourself? Judging by the outfit, I'm going to go with...the Scarlet Speeder?" asked Oliver.

"You're older, so that's a no for Kid Flash," offered Clark.

"Oh! What about the Crimson Comet?"

Barry laughed, "I haven't really picked a name yet, but uh, I'll keep those ones in mind."

"So were you born with super-speed too?"

"No. Actually, I was a forensic scientist in Central City. A bolt of lightning crashed through the window and shattered a shelf of chemicals, when they splashed on me...I was able to move really fast," chuckled Barry. "I'm not really sure how to explain it, I just want use them to help people. Anyways, I saw Bart on TV and I just had to find him. I'm not going to lie, having someone else that knows what it's like to never have an excuse for being late? It's nice."

Oliver laughed and gave Bart a shove, "I bet you feel pretty lucky that you didn't have to go through that."

Bart frowned, not quite getting what Oliver was saying. "What?"

"I meant that you're lucky you were born with your powers, you didn't have to get struck by lightning or anything."

"Dude, I didn't have to get struck by lightning or anything because I got my powers from him.

"Huh?"

Barry let out a laugh, "Apparently...I'm his grandfather."

Both Oliver and Clark exchanged funny looks. "Grandfather? Aren't you a little young to be Bart's grandfather?"

"I have to agree with Ollie, you don't even look old enough to be his father."

Bart started to shake his head, looking from Oliver and Clark with exasperation, "Guys, I told you...I'm from the future."

Oliver and Clark exchanged looks of disbelief, "What?"

"I'm from the future."

Clark frowned, "I thought that was a pick-up line?"

"Well...it is...but it's like an in-joke thing between all of us."

Both Oliver and Clark exchanged looks, "Uh...well...we weren't really in on it then, Buddy."

"Dude! I've said it I don't know how many times! I'm from the 30th Century, Grandma Iris-"

"That would be my wife," chimed Barry.

"Yeah, she sent me here to protect me from some dude who wanted to off our whole family! Don't you guys listen to anything I say?"

Oliver and Clark exchanged looks, Oliver took the point on this one. "Uh...well...yeah, but uh...it's mostly about...you know...what's a good place to eat."

"Dude!"

"What? It's all a blur of video games and food coming out of your mouth! You expect me to stop and listen to _all_ of it?"

Bart glared at Oliver, "You know what?"

"What?"

The young speedster turned around to where Lois was sitting with Kara, "Did you know that Oliver thinks that he made Clark into Superman?"

You know how in the cheesy horror movies, the door slowly creaks open? Well, that's kind of what it looked like as Lois turned her head to look at Oliver with a fierce glare. Kara rolled her eyes as she saw the infamous Lane Vein take it's usual shape on her cousin-in-law's forehead as she stood.

"_You_...made _him_...into _Superman_? Do you know how long it took me to get that look right? I had to twist, and tug, and pull, and tweak-"

"And then she started on his hair," quipped Bart. One glare from Lois made him pale and sweaty, "I...am _so_ sorry...I said that, Lois..."

Lois rolled her eyes and turned back to Oliver. "Ok, there is no way in hell you are taking credit for this one."

"Come on! He was just a farmboy in hicks-ville when I took him under my wing! He became the Blur because of me, and by extension, Superman."

She let out a cold laugh, "You made him feel guilty about leaving the junior-varsity out in the cold!"

Oliver's jaw dropped, "This from the creator of the kill me or kiss me game where you strike fear into his heart and force him to do your bidding? Which...by the way...how exactly is it that you're scared of her in the first place?" he asked Clark, who shook his head wildly.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" demanded Lois. "Are you trying to say you're not scared of me or something?"

"Why would I be scared of you?"

Without another sound, though there might have been a growl during the launch towards him, Lois tackled Oliver to the ground.

"Not the hair! Not the hair!" shouted a high pitch voice.

Bart nudged Clark, "Is she actually worried about her hair while she's murdering someone?"

Lois turned back and blew her bangs out of face to glare at Bart and growl, "That wasn't _me_."

The guys exchanged a laugh at Oliver's expense while Lois went back to throttling him. Barry began to worry about how red Oliver's face had gotten.

"Uh...aren't you going to save him?" asked Barry. "Isn't that kind of...what you do?"

Clark shrugged, "I could...but then I'd need somebody to save _me_ when Lois realizes that I took Ollie's side."

Barry nodded, not really sure what that was supposed to mean. Kara decided to bridge the gap.

"What he means to say is that nobody messes with Lois when it comes to Clark and/or his alter-ego," she explained.

As he watched Oliver struggle to keep Lois from cutting off his oxygen supply, Barry suddenly got it. "Ooooooooooooh."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. There seems to be two thought processes for Bart Allen on Smallville. One is the obvious one that he is in fact Bart Allen from the future. That would fit given his younger age, his personality, and the joke about being from the future since it wouldn't make sense if he was actually Barry. Which brings me to the second thought process, which is that Bart is actually Barry, he just hasn't gotten there yet in a similar way that Clark hasn't gotten to being Superman yet. Personally, I'm voting on the first one even though it would be more convenient to be the second one.

Just for the fun of it, haha, what do you guys think about it?

Anyways, my goal here was to introduce Barry in a way that we can play off as we just haven't been paying well enough attention to Bart, haha. At this point, since they're already calling him it on the show, I'm having Bart as the Flash. That will get changed in 'the Flash' chapter. I'll also have a chapter where we get to meet Wally West. He was originally already around and in this chapter, but I figured I should keep something in tune with the comics here, haha. I was also lucky enough to work in Lois finding out about what Oliver said when he and Bart met Hal Jordan, haha, I hope you guys liked that bit.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, but I think it'll probably be '_the Daily Planet Bullpen_'. No promises though! haha.


	132. Bullpen

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I was never a big Flash fan either, if I'm a fan of any of them it's Wally West for sure, but he's an alright character. I'm not sure he could carry his own movie or anything. He's more of a team character, fit for a JLA movie or something. But that's just me. I think that surviving a Clois fight or a crazy Lois moment is a must have if you want to call yourself a member of the League, haha. Pretty much mandatory, haha.

**_hannah_** - Thanks! You rock! haha. Thanks for reviewing!

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, I didn't want to do it! haha, but Ollie had it coming! I haven't seen _Night at the Museum 2_ yet, but I did love her in _Sunshine Cleaning_ and she certainly has all the talent to be a great Lois Lane, but that will all come down to directing and the script. All too often we're hard on actors for how they came across in movies, but in reality, it's the script and/or the director that let us down. I think that was the situation with _Superman Returns_. I loved Brandon Routh as the Man of Steel, but the script just sucked and it's basically kept him from ever getting that chance to shine.

I think that Tom Welling is a solid actor, but I _know_ that he could be a great Superman. He's proven it whenever we see him step away from Clark Kent, like when he plays Kal or Clark Luthor or especially when he's playing the comedy instead of the drama. He has the chops, and given the right script, I think he'd be a great Clark Kent. He has all the tools to be the charismatic Superman while being the bumbling Clark Kent.

There isn't a lot of Clois love, but there is certainly some Lois rage? haha. I'll make sure to do some fluffy Clois in the next chapter or so!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, all the Flashes have eternal youth, haha. That's something to keep in mind. So do their loved ones, not that I know how that one works or anything, haha. But what you had in the comics was Jay Garrick, who Barry Allen patterned himself after when he got his powers from the chemicals exploding onto him and he gained super-speed, and he was the very first Flash and a member of the Justice Society of America.

Then you had Wally West come along, who is actually the nephew of Iris West (Barry's wife), and he actually got his powers the same way that Barry did when Barry set up how it happened (as Wally's idol, the Flash) and in a freak accident, re-created the event and Wally got his powers. And then you have Bart. Who really is from the future (the 30th Century) and Barry's grandson, but can't control his powers and ages in these weird ways. So his grandma Iris (Barry's wife and Wally's aunt) sends him back to the 20th Century so that Wally can teach him how to deal with his powers. It's very confusing, haha.

I definitely believe that they didn't ask him, but the Green Lantern writer did mention that he wanted Clark Kent to cameo in the Green Lantern movie and hoped that Tom was available. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed! hahaha. I bet Lois will be like, "Wait a minute...is that a big red cape?" hahaha. I hope that we see Tom in some other stuff soon as well, especially in a more comedic light because he's actually really funny! haha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I thought that would be a fun tie-in. It's always been a moment that's stuck with me because at the time, I got a laugh at it because I figured it was a nod to his actual origins as Bart. I don't think that Bart will become Barry either, I think they just did what they did with Speedy (Mia even though Roy Harper came first) and with Blue Beetle (Jaime even though Ted Kord came first) and jumped ahead.

The whole fake ID thing was a way to avoid discussing the multiple Flashes and they kind of messed up by introducing Jay Garrick in Absolute Justice because it just goes to show that there really was a Jay Garrick. Just one of many brain farts by the Smallville writers, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - In his post-finale interviews he actually says he was glad he shaved his head all those years because one day with a bald cap was an absolute terror for him, haha. But even though I wish he would have shaved it, I have to be happy he's back. It wouldn't be the end without Lex. Not for me.

Hahaha, I've been putting Lois & Clark on while I'm cooking dinner or cleaning up lately, and I just re-watched that episode the other day, haha. I should work something in about Lois being the top banana into one of these chapters, haha. I don't know if we're even quite yet, haha, I think you do a bit more day dreaming about Tom than I do about Erica! hahaha. I've seen your Pheobe gif! haha.

I don't know why I'm the girl either! hahaha. But yes, I think if I had to pick a girl to be, Lois Lane would be right up there at the top, haha. And yes! It is a good mode to be in for writing! hahaha. If you're locked away, you must do something productive! haha.

Basement, Star City, Grandpa Kent, Blur, Living Room, Halloween, Carter, Father's Day, Bruce, and the Kents, huh? Interesting. . . .hahaha.

_**A,sky**_ - I am hoping for the same! We can never have enough Martha/Lois time! haha. I'm glad you liked Barry as well!

**_NeverSayNever95_** - Hahaha, well doesn't that make me feel all giddy? haha. And yeah, Michael Rosenbaum plays a douche bag, but it's a douche bag with a heart of gold! haha. I thought he was freaking hilarious in tonight's episode trying to score points with Mel's dad, hahaha. That was hilarious.

_**svgurl410**_ - That's one of my favorites too, haha. In my head, I can vividly picture that scene with Oliver and Chloe, and not to toot my own horn, but it still cracks me up watching Oliver jump from rooftop to rooftop screaming, "It was Chloe! It was Chloe!" hahaha.

**_Review_** - They haven't actually _called_ him the Flash yet, but anytime you see Bart's name written down somewhere, it's never far behind. With the way that they've set up the character, it's not really surprising to me. I doubt we'll see Barry or Wally get mentioned, let alone appear, so he could be the Flash of this particular universe. I'd say that Bart encompasses all of the Flashes, but we've see Jay Garrick, so he's clearly not the only one.

As far as my use of "haha", I know it's way overused, but it's the only way to add tone to when I reply to folks, just a force of habit.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12, but the idea came from _LoisNClark4Ever_!

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #132, the Daily Planet Bullpen

******Author's Note:** This chapter is a sequel to Chapter #120, _Basement_. Hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

Lucy hopped over a rolling Lois and Clark, losing one of her heels in the process. Not that either Lois or Clark noticed this.

"You are so f-"

"Watch the language in my newsroom, Lane. Great Cesar's ghost," muttered Perry as he stepped over the couple.

"-ing dead, Smallville!"

Jimmy grimaced and flinched as Lois delivered blows to Clark's arms, currently doing their best to block the fists of fury coming his way. Lucy watched on with a cocky grin forming on her face, but as Lois looked up wildly and glared at Lucy, "You're next!", she started to worry.

'_Apparently, I'm going to get mine too..._' Gulp.

**earlier that day . . . .**

Clark sat at his desk, sorting through his notes for his next story. His glasses kept slipping down his nose, he felt an urge to melt them down with his heat vision if he had to push them back up again. '_I have the best vision on the planet and I'm stuck wearing these things..._'

"Stupid glasses," he muttered under his breath.

"Personally, I thought you looked much more hunky without them."

He shot up from his seat, dropping all of his papers in the process. He looked up to see his sister-in-law standing in the door frame, "Oh, hey Lucy."

Lucy rolled her eyes as Clark knelt down to pick them up, "When did you get so clumsy, Clark? You used to be so coordinated."

"Uh...," he fumbled for the words to cover it up, "...I guess you could say Lois has smacked me in the head too many times," he quipped with a chuckle.

"Do strapping young farmboys always let their wives smack them around? Or is that just a Lois and Clark thing?"

Clark blushed, "I think it's a Lois and Clark thing, she starts out wanting my blood and ends up wanting my...uh...so why did you stop by again?"

"Because I know what you two did to Jimmy."

"Wha...I don't...we wouldn't-"

"Don't start with me, Clark, I know that you weren't the man behind the curtain, just her puppet boy, it's ok."

Clark made a funny face, "I'm not...I can...I can...does everybody call me her puppet boy?"

"Yeah, get over it, that's not what I'm here about."

"Then what are you here about?"

"I'm going to make Lois pay and you're going to help me do it."

He frowned, "What makes you think-"

Lucy held up her hand, "I know that it was you that gave Lois that red lipstick that made her turn all horny."

Clark paled, "So what's the plan?"

Walking at a brisk pace across the Daily Planet newsroom floor, Lois Lane felt good. She had found herself one hell of a source and she was going to blow the roof off this story. Well, her and Clark's story. They had agreed to tackle LexCom story together.

She turned the handle and used her back to open the door to their office, "Smallville, you are never going to belie-"

Lois dropped her papers when she saw who was sitting in Clark's chair. "Cat?"

The blonde in all her pink glory had the nerve to smile at her. "Hey Lois!"

"Wha...wha...what are you doing here? Where's Clark?"

"He went out with Olsen for lunch, he told Mr. White that he wanted to give me his spot on the story."

Lois nearly fainted. "He did what?"

Cat didn't seem to notice, "Mr. White came by and told me that I was going to get to work on the LexCom story with you."

The brunette shook her head back and forth, trying to wake herself from this nightmare. "Clark would never do that. Why would he do that?"

"Maybe the story was too big for him," shrugged Cat.

Clark could hear the stomping all the way on the other side of the newsroom. Judging by the look of fear on Jimmy's face and the smug look pasted on Lucy's face, Clark had a hunch that you probably didn't need to have super-hearing to hear it. "_Smallville_!"

He took a deep breath and recited his speech in his head, '_Perry did what? Why would he take me off the story? I'm so sorry, Lois. I'll talk to him!_'

Lois rounded the corner with fire in her eyes.

"You gave up _our_ story? You do realize that this means that I have to work with _Cat_, right? How the hell could you do this to me?"

His eyes got as big as saucers. "Wait, what? Perry said he'd tell her that it was his idea!"

Lucy grinned victoriously, "I told Cat. This is _your_ share of the payback."

Clark barely had time to shoot Lucy a glare before Lois tackled him to the ground like a linebacker. Lucy's grin only grew, '_Payback is a bitch, Kents._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well? haha. What did you guys think? I actually struggled pretty bad to figure out how to have Lucy get her revenge, though all along, I knew I wanted to work Cat in there somehow, haha. She is Lois's nemesis after all! And yes, we will get a prequel chapter that reveals what exactly the whole red lipstick situation was, haha. Have no fear my Red-K fans! haha. We will see horny Lois in all her glory again!

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Green Kryptonite_.


	133. Green K

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Trust me, when you see what happens, you'll get it, hahaha. She's not mad about him _giving_ her Red-K (which is an accident, btw), she's mad about what she does when she's _on_ the Red-K, hahaha. And I don't mean what she does to Clark, hahaha. That she doesn't mind so much. You will also find out how Lucy managed to find out, because it takes place during that chapter so that she can notice all that chaos, haha.

I've been thinking about doing that scene for a while now, so since you asked, you shall get it! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Haha, I'm starting to pick up on these things! I think she might of been blinded by Cat-Rage eyes, haha.

**_LoisClarkNLove_** - I will try and work in a little Tempus just for you, haha. I hated the Lex Luthor on Lois & Clark too, he was even worse than Gene Hackman, and I _hated_ Gene Hackman. Though it was mostly because they made Lex Luthor a two-bit crook in the Superman movies, never liked that.

If he wasn't you know...Superman...haha, I would seriously send the guy for a catscan or two. Lois would have had to've knocked something loose over the years, haha. I agree, I don't think Clark does mind the idea of Lois having him all tied up. Wait...what? haha. I love it when Beckett says that! hahaha. That's like her catch-phrase on _Castle_! I get giddy just thinking about it! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Haha, they're confusing! It took me ages to get to this place of understanding, and even now, I barely understand it! Bart's age always jumps around it seems. I always get super confused with the "deaths" of characters too. If I had to pick the hardest thing to comprehend, it's the Infinite Crisis that killed my brain. Dealing with all these different "Earths" or "Universes" was a freaking nightmare!

I don't know if Tom is in it, but I know that one of the writers said he wrote a Clark Kent cameo and that he hopes Tom Welling has a couple hours of free time to come down and shoot something. I don't know if the cameo will stay in the movie though, so don't kill me if it gets cut! haha.

One of the things that Tom needs to do is step away from Clark Kent a little bit. I know that seems crazy considering I want him to play Superman, but he needs to get his feet wet in some new roles so that he can expand his range a bit, because playing Superman in a movie is really playing two very different characters. Three if you count the time he spends with people who know is both because the real Clark is somewhere in between the two.

Haha, Lois doesn't forget much (Cept Clark's identity every season, haha), so she'll latch onto this for a while, haha.

**_alexindigo_** - Hahaha, I'm sure you pictured it going differently, haha. When you see what happens in the prequel, you're going to know why he folded so very quickly, haha. That was something I was hoping would give you guys something to chew on for a bit, haha.

Kate Bowsworth just didn't play a strong Lois Lane. And her figure has something to do with that I think. Not that I have a problem with skinny women, just that Lois Lane is not a thin girl. She's not a big girl either, but she should be able to throw down if she needs to. Don't think Kate could. That's something that she can't "act" her way out of, and as mean as it sounds, she doesn't have the talent to do that anyways.

I agree, playing Superman is half the challenge it is to play most other characters until you deal with the fact that you have to play at least two different characters and make them seem like polar opposites even when they are the same person. That's where even Brandon Routh and Dean Cain failed, and it's why I will always call Christopher Reeve the perfect Superman. Clark Kent has to be one way, Superman has to be the other, and you can add a third one if you're going to have him interact with someone who knows he is both because the _real_ Clark is somewhere in between.

And yes, there will be some steamy bits in that chapter, haha. I know how badly you want to see that! haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Oh yeah...it's bad, haha. I'm glad that you liked Wedding Day and the bits in the Barry chapter! haha.

_**twlighting**_ - I'm glad that you like it! I want them to be fun for you guys, they're certainly fun for me to write! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Clana, mentions of Chlark

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #133, Green Kryptonite

**Author's Note: **Sorry this one is a little later than usual. Crashed early last night, it's been one of those weeks, haha. This one is from '_Committed_'!

* * *

'_Why does he have to be so stupid? ...I mean...why would he just burst through the door like that? No backup...no help...it was stupid...I guess he was just trying to find Chloe and Jimmy..._' she considered.

'_He called out for you...he said that the guy let Chloe and Jimmy go..._' a voice in the back of her head offered.

'_Your point?_'

'_My point is that he burst through the door with no backup...and no help...so he could save **you**,_' the voice explained.

If it weren't for the current surroundings, Lois would have blushed. '_Well...I guess that was kind of sweet...stupid, but sweet..._'

She noticed that Clark began to move. "Clark?" she asked to response. His head began to bob back and forth as he regained consciousness . "Wake up...Clark!" he still didn't answer her. He blinked a few times as his vision began to clear, "Clark! Wake up!" she demanded.

His eyes shot open and he saw her fearful expression soften, '_Clark was ok..._' she mentally sighed.

Clark began to shift in his seat, trying to break loose. The kryptonite was across the room, but it's effects were still too strong to keep him from breaking loose from his shackles. Clark saw the man tinker with something he couldn't make out in the distance, not without his super-vision.

"I know who you are!" shouted Clark.

Whatever the man had been tinkering with became less important as he turned to them. "Then I suppose I won't be needing thing anymore..." lifting his mask, the man revealed himself to be Macy, the Jewelry Store owner. "Now that we're all acquainted, let's begin."

"What's the point? Now that we've both seen your face you're going to kill us anyway," Lois questioned.

Macy simply went back to his tinkering. "Don't be so certain..."

Lois almost snorted. '_How many bad guys does a girl have to face before she knows how the game works?_' she wanted to snarl.

"You must really...care about her, storming in here. Very gallant of you," Macy credited Clark.

Lois look across with a look that appeared to be a mix of thanks and annoyance, "Yeah...he's stupid that way."

Clark started to wonder if he had down more bad than good for Lois by crashing in here like he did. "Let her go."

"After her turn, you'll get yours."

Her face twisted with confusion, "My turn? What is this? Some kind of game?"

"No...no, it's a test. To reveal how much you two have been hiding from one another." Both look scared for different reasons. "If you pass...you'll want to invite me to your wedding." Once again, she felt like snorting. '_As if Smallville would ever ask me to-...wait! That's not the point! There is no wedding!_'

"If you fail...well, then the guest list will be the least of your worries," they shared looks of fear. "Ladies first. Have you ever cheated on your fiancee?"

Lois wasn't sure how to answer. On the one hand, they weren't actually married. On the other hand, he might kill them for lying.

"Of course not, don't be ridiculous."

The machine made noise and the the needles danced. Suddenly, Clark was being shocked with electricity to Lois's horror.

"What are you doing?" she screamed as he shook in agony. "You're killing him!" she cried.

"No...your lies are," accused Macy.

Lois's heart broke at the thought that she did this to him. "Okay! Okay! I take it back then! I'm sorry! Just, just don't hurt him again!"

She looked Clark struggle with the pain still coursing through him, his breathing heavy. She would have done anything to take that shock for him. Clark on the other hand was glad that it was himself that took the shock instead of Lois. "Killing us...it won't take away the pain that pushed you here."

"I'm doing this, for you," replied Macy with a mysterious tone.

"What?" she muttered.

"The broken hearted are the walking dead. Either way, I'm saving you both a lot of unnecessary pain."

Lois had heard enough. "Okay, Crazy. This is the deal, we're not even really a couple. So this twisted test doesn't mean anything."

Macy didn't seem to care, he'd heard people say a lot of things in her position. "Next question. Deep down, underneath it all...do you love this man?"

That cued the panic.

Lois looked across at Clark with pure fear in her eyes. '_What am I supposed to say? I can't tell...I can't..._'

"Answer the question, Lois. Don't out think it. Just tell the truth." - Clark

She didn't know what to say. '_Doesn't he know what the truth will mean? That after I say it, it can never be taken back?_'

'_Can you blame him?_' questioned the voice in her head. '_You've hidden the truth from him for so long, how is he supposed to know the consequences of that question? How is he supposed to know that your little sibling relationship has just been a shield all this time?_'

'_What did you expect me to do? He was in Lana Land...he meant so much to Chloe...besides...it's not like I-_'

'_Who do you think you're kidding, Lane? And Chloe has Jimmy now. She would have understood. You didn't have to hide all this time._'

Macy was starting to grow impatient. "Do you love him?"

The voice in her head was also growing impatient, '_Tell him! Do you want to see him get hurt again?_'

'_No! Of course not! But I don't want to get hurt either! If I tell him the truth, we can never come back from that. It will change things **forever**._'

"Tell the truth," advised Clark.

Lois wanted to go up, up, and away through the ceiling at that moment. '_He doesn't understand..._'

'_You won't know until you put yourself out there. All those nights spent at the Farm, all the time spend at the Planet, you know that there is something there and you know that you wouldn't be here if it wasn't true. You've always known...deep down...underneath it all..._'

"Do you love...him?" asked Macy. His patience growing thinner all the time.

'..._that you love Clark Kent. That you feel more like yourself when you're with him than you've ever felt with anybody else_.'

She knew what she had to do, she just had to find the strength within herself to do it. '_Tell the truth...do you love him?_'

Lois began to tremble as she made her decision, '_If we're going to die right now...and I'm never going to going to get to kiss that big, stupid, wonderfully handsome farmboy into an early death...then at least I can tell him...do I love Clark Kent? My **Smallville**?_'

"Yes."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to capture what I felt like was a pretty huge moment, even if nothing came of it, between Clois. And I thought that it would be fun to think about, "What was Lois thinking this whole time?"

Besides, "Did he just shoot fire out of his eyes? And how did he get out of those shackles so easily?", haha. Seriously, she didn't notice any of that? She must have been still woozy from the drugs that she was on, haha. Anyways, sorry it's a little late, but I just got my lunch-break so I figured I would finish up the story and get it out there for you guys! Hope you liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm thinking it's going to be '_the 4th of July_', and if I may so myself, you guys are in for a treat, haha.


	134. 4th of July

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - They were both great in that episode, one of their best Clois moments all in all. Haha, I see what you did there, haha.

I agree with you about Kate Bosworth. Her figure really took away from the character because, and I'm not hating on skinny women or anything here, she just looked fragile. She looked like she would break if you squeezed her too hard. That's the complete opposite of Lois Lane. And Erica Durance is very healthy and very strong looking. She looks like she could go ten rounds with the best of them. She's a real Lois Lane.

I hear you about the Reeve/Welling thing. If I were to make the movie, I'd have him do what Ewan McGregor did for the prequel trilogy of Star Wars. McGregor got a constant loop of Alec Guinness scenes from the original Star Wars trilogy and watched them over and over again. And when you watch his performance, I think it really shows. I would definitely do the same thing with Tom Welling or any other actor who might play the Man of Steel.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - That was another one! haha. He was all healed up, doesn't she notice these things? hahaha. And you are special! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think I can accommodate that request, haha. I've been thinking about doing another story that would be much shorter than this one that I was going to call "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda" in vein with the Prom chapter, and that'd be a great addition, haha. But I think I already have a way for that scene in particular to fit into this story, so have no fear! hahaha. I think we'll hear his answer, haha.

_**Jaclyn Parker**_ - Haha, well, you're reviewing now, that's what counts! haha.

Where were girls like you when I was obsessing over my comics? hahaha. But I hear you loud and clear. I think a lot of the female comic book characters are fantastic role models for girls. I've certainly been drawn to the Lois Lane and Mary Jane Watson types over the years, haha. I prefer, like Clark and Peter, the kind of girl that is strong willed and isn't just another damsel in distress. So I definitely hear you, haha. And awwww, you're so sweet! haha. I do love these characters and I do love writing their stories. And you're right, Clois is _the_ comic book pairing. Almost none have stood the test of time like they have.

I am always more and more impressed with Erica Durance with each episode, so I wasn't even surprised how awesome she was in Dominion, haha. She's _the_ Lois Lane, I don't think anyone else even comes close. And yeah, Tess was totally freaking out, haha. I don't mind novels! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I can't wait to see how I figure out how to put Tempus in this one, hahaha. You're going to be the death of me! haha. Me? Me? You don't get caught up in your Tom Welling day dreams on me! hahaha. I'm going to start getting jealous! haha. Beckett is just pure awesome, haha. Seriously, Castle, how could you not call that girl? If you weren't _the Captain_, you'd be in so much trouble! hahaha.

I'm glad that you liked it! haha. I was doing the same thing, so that chapter had a lot of pressure for me, haha. And yes, Dominion was epic! haha. I can't wait to see Prophecy because it looks like it's only going to get bigger and better! And did you see Black Manta and Captain Cold? Holy freaking awesome!.

**_sasslady_** - But they will be three amazing episodes! haha.

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, you flatter me too much! haha. It's always a treat to see your reviews! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Hahaha, you hit the nail on the head!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Jucy, mentions of Chimmy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #134, the Fourth of July

**Author's Note:** I'm really sorry about the long wait! I went back home to visit my mom since I'm not sure if I'll be able to next weekend for mother's day, and apparently, she has decided she doesn't need internet anymore, haha. It was like being in ancient times, hahaha.

Anyways, this is the prequel to Chapter #132, the Daily Planet Bullpen. I think it's going to answer some of your questions, haha.

* * *

"Hey, will you go grab my purse out of the office? I need my lipstick before we go out tonight."

Clark smirked, "You getting all gussied up for me, Ms. Lane?"

Lois spun around in her chair, "You better believe it, Mr. Kent."

He tore out of the records room towards their office in search of her purse. When he came out, he caught the end of a conversation.

"They asked how awesome Lois was? And they bickered like a married couple?" asked Lucy.

"Yeah, it was super weird. And one of them got really grossed out about us...you know...making with the _bow chicka bow wow_?"

Clark immediately tripped over his own feet, toppling towards the ground and sending the contents of his wife's purse flying. He began to scoop it up and put it back into the purse when a heeled foot stepped into his vision, "How you doing down there, Clark?"

He looked up with wide eyes at his sister-in-law, "Uh...it's uh...it's going ok. Going ok. What about you? How's it going? For you?"

Lucy narrowed her eyes, "It's funny you should ask."

"It is?" he gulped.

"Jimmy was just telling me that these people kidnapped him and asked about his relationship with me."

Clark tried his best to look innocent, "That's uh...that's crazy."

"I know right?" she asked with a knowing smirk. Clark wasn't very good at lying. He kept trying to avoid her intense star. "And they bickered like they didn't know whether to kiss or kill the other one the whole time, how wild is that?"

He scooped up a lipstick, not noticing the other lipstick under one of the desks, while pushing his glasses up his nose, "Pretty wild."

"Yeah...Speaking of wild, when did you start carrying around a purse and lipstick?" she teased.

Clark let out a nervous laugh, "They are for Lois. I think this must be the lipstick she wanted, it's the only one in the bag."

Lucy nodded, "I figured as much, you better run along before she switches from kiss mode into kill mode."

He gave her a quick head flick, "You're probably right."

Clark made his way back to the records room and found Lois waiting for him impatiently.

"You're Superman, Clark. Here I am thinking up ways to ring your Kryptonian bell and you've decided to go into sloth mode-"

"I ran into Lucy and Jimmy."

Lois groaned for the both of them, "Were they off in their pre-wedded bliss again?"

Clark chuckled, "You know, I'm pretty sure we were once young and in love." He saw her face and quickly added, "Not that we're old and out of love."

She gave him a warning glance as she pulled out her lipstick, "That's better."

He smiled, "I'm going to drop off the story with Perry, and then we can head out. Oliver told me the fireworks are going to be great in Star City."

Lois applied her lipstick while watching him walk out of the room. She had been so distracted, she didn't even notice which lipstick she happened to be applying at that particular moment. At least not until that flare of sexual energy flared up in her as she saw that Clark's butt was the last thing to leave the room.

"Oh, Clarkie...I'm going to set your firework off tonight..."

Clark could hear the whistles and the catcalls from the main floor as he listened to Perry's story about Elvis.

"...and so he's up there, and he's just killing the whole room, and- what the hell is going on out there!" barked Perry.

The two walked over to see Lois Lane strutting down the main isle in what appeared to be an American flag bikini top. The majority of the office was cheering her on, but she didn't notice. Her eyes were fixed on Clark Kent, and the rest of the room was just white noise.

"Lois?" squeaked Clark.

She gave him a predatory glance, "Aye aye, sailor."

Perry and Clark exchanged looks, Perry shrugged. "God bless America?"

Clark groaned and dragged Lois into their office by her hand, much to the displeasure of the staff. Once inside, he spun her so that she was sitting on their desk with her legs kicking out. "A step up from our old dusty newsroom, dontcha think, Clarkie?"

"Where did you find that outfit?"

"I was going to use it on our date tonight," she purred.

He let out a sigh, "What did you take?"

She gave him an innocent look, "I don't know what you're talking about, Smallville. But if I've been a bad girl, you might want to spank me."

"Oh god, please don't say stuff like that."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not going to be able to control myself, Lois."

She hopped off the desk and pulled him in close, Clark felt like he was in her spell, she purred in his ear, "I like the sound of that."

He pulled back, "You...you...you do?"

She nodded, "I missed the way that red-k makes me feel. I feel like I'm going to explode just looking at your muscles, Smallville."

He looked down in shock, '_How in the name of Rao did she manage to unbutton my shirt so quick?_'

Clark dashed around to the other side of the desk, "Lois! You can't kiss me!"

She let out a laugh and ran her tongue around her K-9 tooth, "Why not? You are my husband after all."

"Why...because...I...if you...if you kiss me...I'm going to get infected too! And I...I won't...I won't be..." his speech was getting all matter of interrupted as Lois began to play with the strings of her bikini top, "I uh...I won't be able to...control...myself!"

Lois gave him a cheeky grin, "And what's wrong with that?"

Clark was stumped, "Whats wrong with that? Uh...what's wrong with that?"

Lois stepped closer and closer to him, her hands wrapping around the collar of his jacket. Her mouth was dangerously close and Clark was all oogly eyes.

"Yeah, Smallville. What's wrong with being out of control?"

He didn't seem to have an answer. He crept slowly towards her face, "I don't know..."

Before their lips could meet, a ball of blonde leaped between the two and sprayed Lois in the face with some sort of green perfume. Both Lois and Clark shot backwards as they saw Chloe Sullivan laying on the ground with her finger pointed at Lois, "Gotcha!"

"Chloe? What the hell?" asked Lois.

She got up to her feet, waving the perfume in the brunette's face. "You off the juice? Huh? You off it?"

Lois gave her a funny look, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I think she's off it," offered Clark. No one missed the hint of sadness in his voice as the declaration though.

Chloe quirked an eyebrow at Lois and lowered her weapon. Clark frowned, "How did you know to..."

"Little Jimmy tweeted '_Mad Dog Gone Wild_' a little while ago. A bunch of other people had similar tweets. I put two-and-two together."

Clark's forehead scrunched up, "Tweets?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "You are such a farmboy sometimes, you know that?"

He turned on her with a smirk, "Didn't keep you from coming onto me when you were high on Red-K just now."

"That lipstick makes you fall for the first guy you see, don't get a big head, Smallville."

Clark continued to smirk, "Speaking of which...why do you still have that lipstick?"

Lois paled, "What?"

His smirk only grew, "I said...why do you still have it if you know what it does to you?"

Her expression did not change, ". . . .what?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Was it worth the long wait? haha. In my mind, Lois is angry because now all of the Daily Planet has seen her in her star-spangaled bikini outfit and probably have cellphone pictures to prove it! haha. And of course, Lucy finds out because she saw Clark with the lipstick, and I assume there is an offscreen moment where she explains this to Lucy and Jimmy, haha. Well, that the lipstick makes her horny, not the kryptonite part.

Anyways, I'm super tired, and I'll be posting a chapter for sunday with this one as well, and then I'll post a Monday chapter in the morning probably, maybe a little later in the day actually. I just got home and just copy-and-pasted from my Word Documents to get these up for you guys, hope you like them! Shoot me a review when you're done and let me know! Sorry about the delays! I would've posted them before if I had known I'd have no internet! haha.

**Next Up:** _Grandma Lane-Kent_.


	135. Grandma LaneKent

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #135, Grandma Lane-Kent

**Author's Note:** The flashback takes place during Chapter #116, Jo'an's Bedroom.

* * *

_"Is it hard? You know...being a mom?"_

_She looked down at the baby in her arms. She let her mind drift back to one of her most treasured memories..._

"That is still _my_ cup! How are you going to explain your way out of that?"

For the first time since Lois came up stairs, Jo'an looked worried. Then she smirked, "I don't see your name on it, Mom."

Lois felt her jaw drop. "I don't _need_ to have my name on it!"

"They say at school that if you don't want someone to take your stuff, you should write your name on it."

"I don't care what they say at your school, that's my cup!"

"You don't care what my school says?"

"No!"

Jo'an felt her smirk grow, "Then I guess that means I don't need to do homework anymore."

"What?"

"My teachers tell me to do my homework. If you don't care what they say, then I don't have to do it anymore!"

Lois groaned. "Why do you have to be such a pain?"

Jo'an shrugged, "Daddy says it's a Lane thing."

Lois made sure to make a mental note of that, "I'm going to show your father _exactly_ how much of a pain a Lane can be."

The little girl giggled, "He's gunna like that."

"Don't try and distract me, Munchkin. I want to know why you feel the need to _always_ take my cup."

"Because I want to be like you."

Lois narrowed her eyes, "What?"

Jo'an rolled her eyes, "I wanna be like you."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you want to be like me?"

The girl shrugged, "Because you're my mom. You're the coolest."

Lois couldn't bite back the smile that was growing on her face, "You think I'm cool?"

Jo'an looked at Lois like she was crazy. "Uh...Mom...duh. You even make _Superman_ scared of you. Scared of _you_! How cool is that?"

"I do scare him pretty bad sometimes, don't I?" bragged Lois.

"Yeah, but it's kind of silly."

Lois frowned, "Why is it silly?"

Once again, Jo'an looked at Lois like she was crazy. "Because everybody knows you _can't_ kill him."

"Oh, you believe me, I could kill your father if I wanted to," assured Lois with a crazy look on her face.

Jo'an laughed, "You _could_...but you _won't_. Daddy says that he can't live without you, and _everybody_ knows you can't live without him."

Lois bit her tongue. The kid had here there. She would always end up kissing Clark Kent, no matter how much she intended on killing me. It was her curse. She walked over and sat behind her daughter, Jo'an let her head rest on her mother's chest.

She reached around and grabbed the spoon from Jo'an and scooped up a bite for herself, "So...tell me what else is cool about me."

"You're the like the most bad ass reporter in the world!"

Lois gave her a nudge, "Don't say that word! Your dad is going to kill me if he hears you say that!"

Jo'an gave her an apologetic look, but Lois couldn't help but smirk, "I am pretty bad ass though, aren't I?"

She nodded enthusiastically and listed off her favorite things about her mother. Lois grinned as a warm feeling spread within her stomach.

"And you can never yell at me about my spelling homework because you're the _worst_ speller!" giggled Jo'an.

"Hey!"

_Lois looked up from the baby in her arms, giving Jo'an a warm look. "It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do."_

_Jo'an frowned, a worried expression taking over her features._

_Her mother smirked, 'My baby girl is such an easy mark.'_

_"But it was the most rewarding experience of my entire life, of any mother's life..."_

_Jo'an looked up with a smile, "I love you, Mom."_

_Lois gave Jo'an a kiss on her forehead, "And I love you, Monster. And I love Monster Jr too," she said in a baby voice, tickling the baby's nose._

_"Well, I'm never going to forget this moment," an amused voice called from the behind them._

_They turned to see Clark Kent standing in the doorway, two coffees in his hand. "Is anybody going to tell me they love me?" he teased._

_Lois walked over and plucked one of the coffees out of his hand, "You're such a drama queen, Smallville. And yes, I love you very much."_

_Clark smiled and pulled Lois to his chest as they watched their baby girl hold her own baby girl, Lois leaned her head up._

_"I'm so proud of her."_

_He kissed her on her cheek, "Me too."_

_Lois watched as Jo'an tickled the baby's nose like she had done earlier, Clark could hear her jaw clench._

_"And if you tell anyone that I talked in a baby voice, I'm going to change our Red-K date into a Green-K date," she warned._

_Clark laughed, "Lo..." she looked up to catch his eye, "...you know I'd never risk a Red-K date."_

_Before Lois could reply, Jo'an groaned, "Super-hearing runs in the family, you two!"_

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, what did you guys think? haha. Hopefully this made up for the long wait! I know that I certainly liked this one! I wanted to do something with just Lois and Jo'an that would end up being kind of heart warming, and hopefully I pulled that off. There was a little bit there at the end that was inspired by a conversation with the lovely Katlynne though! haha. Poor Jo'an has seen and heard far too much of her parent's...dates...haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought! Once again, sorry for the delays!

**Next Up:** I honestly don't know.


	136. Luthor Mansion

**Review Comments:**

_**A,sky**_ - Haha, you're going to make me blush! And yes, I almost feel bad for Jo'an, but you have to admit, it's gotta be a blast to be Superman's daughter, haha. i am glad you liked Red-K Lois, haha, she's one of my favorite versions of Lois, haha. Season 4 Lois taking the cake of course, haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, you think she keeps them in a special drawer in her desk? haha. Made out of lead. haha. Oh man, I feel for Jo'an then! haha. I have to imagine Monster Jr is going to be just as much of a handful! And I think I will cover that idea, I have a good idea for the spin I think.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Aww, haha. I'm glad that it was such a hit! haha. I know that most f the time we present Lois and Jo'an like the don't get along, but deep down, they so love each other, haha. I really wanted to show that in this one. And yes, I'm sure that I'll be doing something along those lines for when I finally do my "M" chapter, haha. I think that you guys have earned it by this point, who am I to deny you guys? haha.

**_svgurl410_** - Supposedly he just comes back, so I had to bring him back! haha. And if I'm going to have Carter come back, then I have to bring back Shayera too so that they can be all lovey dovey, haha. Can you imagine Carter being fluffy? hahaha. Oh boy!

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that it served as an understandable motive for Clark to be too scared to let her find out, haha. Lois has had that lipstick all along, haha. She knows that sooner or later, she's going to want to does herself and/or Clark, haha. She's a naughty girl like that, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Ok, first off, WHY DID YOU LEAVE THE ROOM, CASTLE? DAMN YOU! ...I'm sorry, Captain...hahaha. Second of all, yes, Tempus is the jackass that we all love. He's like the Barney Stinson of Superman, haha. Oh god, dial-up might be worse than no internet at all, haha. It'd be the ultimate tease, haha. HEY! NO DAY DREAMING! Hahaha. She was so busted just then, haha. That was a, "I can't say anything without incriminating myself" face, hahaha.

I'm pretty sure a blind man could see that sexual tension, haha. And yeah, I kind of pictured Lois mumbling and nodding as she pictured all the ways she could kill poor Clark, haha. But like Jo'an says, there's no way she'd ever follow through with it, haha. And yes! Very lovely! hahaha. Now study! hahaha.

_**NeverSayNEver95**_ - Hahaha, I think I had Jo'an call it "Wresting" at one point, haha. Poor girl, haha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, Red-K is better, but Pink-K is so funny! hahaha. And yeah, I think the Red-K dates become kind of a date-night type deal, haha. I have been plotting out my Red-K M-chapter, and I think that one of those date nights will be the basis for it, haha.

_**Jaclyn Parker**_ - Hey now, haha, you can't blame me for that! hahaha. In my head, she was going in slow motion as well, haha. I just keep seeing the look on her face and the way she was pointing at Lois, haha. Oh man, I can't stop laughing picture Allison Mack like that, haha.

I'm glad that I could bring you a Clois child that you can really enjoy! Though really, mygyps17 deserves all the credit, haha. I too shy away from the children type stories too, which is why I try and mix it up with chapter that feature Jo'an and chapters that have childless-Clois. I take a lot of requests! haha. As long as I can find a way to fit it to our kill-me-or-kiss-me theme, bring it on! haha. And I love your idea! I'm sure that I'll be writing it within the next couple chapters because it was such an awesome idea! I already know how I want to write it, haha. I hope that you will like it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #136, the Luthor Mansion

**Author's Note: **This chapter is pretty self-explanitory once you get into it, but it should take place during the Finale. It's also Monday's chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

Clark toed the rubble under his feet with a faint feeling of disbelief.

Even though he had been there when it happened, even though he had been there since it happened, he was still in shock that the Luthor Mansion was in ruins. It didn't recall the best of memories, but it did pertain to a certain individual that Clark had been thinking about a lot lately. He could almost see the roaring fire to his right, the pool table to his left, and the man he once called his best friend sitting at the desk in front of him.

"Hey."

He turned to see Lois standing in the doorway, "Lois, what are you doing here? It's not safe."

She rolled her eyes, "Forget me, what are you doing in here? Haven't you seen enough of this place?"

Clark looked away shyly, which piqued her interest. "Smallville? What is it?"

"I've just been having these...weird feelings. I keep thinking about Lex."

Lois quirked an eyebrow, "Do you need to tell me something, Future Husband?"

Clark let out a loud laugh, "Not those kind of feelings, Future Wife."

"Good. I don't like to share," she smirked. "Now tell me about these weird feelings you've been having." She noticed his look of discomfort, "Seriously? I made you run to DC last night so that you could get Mrs. K's famous cherry pie early for me. Yours can't be that bad."

He smiled, "I feel so...close...to my destiny. I feel like I'm becoming the man that my fathers wanted me to be. And..."

She frowned, "And?"

He swallowed deeply, "And there has always been this...connection between me and Lex. When I was younger, there was this group of people. They were called the Kawatche?" Her look of confusion told him she didn't know the name. "Well, they told a legend of a man that would be as strong as ten men...and would shoot fire from his eyes, and his name was Naman. And supposedly, he was going to protect the world."

"I know a guy like that," she laughed.

"Yeah, well, there was another man...his name was Sageeth. And Sageeth was supposed to be like a brother of Naman, but someday, Sageeth would turn on Naman and become the villain of the story. He would become Naman's greatest enemy."

Lois frowned, "And you think that Lex is this Saggy dude? Clark...Lex is dead."

He nodded, "I know he is. And Tess has always thought that Davis was Sageeth. And that by brother, it mean fellow Kryptonian."

"But you don't?"

Clark took a deep breath, "I don't." Lois didn't seem to know what to say. "Davis was a lot of things, but he wasn't my brother. And he didn't turn on me, he was sent here to kill me. Lex was...He would've been the best man at our wedding if things hadn't...if he hadn't..."

"Clark..."

"And then there's what Dr. Fate said."

Lois frowned, "What did he say?"

"That Lex would be my greatest opponent," he recalled. Lois opened her mouth to reply but he held up a hand. "He said that _after_ Lex died."

The two shared a moment of silence. Lois wasn't really sure what to say. On the one hand, Lex Luthor had been dead for years now. On the other hand, that Dr. Fate guy was kind of a horoscope genius. "I'm telling you, Lois...I can just feel it in my stomach. It's like he's already back."

Lois walked over and planted a kiss on his lips, "If he does come back, he's out of luck."

Clark looked at her with a confused smile.

"I already called dibs on getting to kill you, Smallville," she explained.

He laughed and pulled her close, "How about we just stick to the kissing?"

Lois shook her head, "You're already getting a big one up on that alter tomorrow. What makes you think you deserve a sneak preview?"

Clark ran his hand up the small of her back, then surprised her with a quick pull so their chests were touching and their faces were close. Lois gulped.

"Good answer."

They shared a steamy kiss, a rare happy moment in a place that hadn't had a happy moment in quite some time. Lois pulled back, breathless.

"Ok, if you're going to get a sneak preview of the wedding kiss, I want a sneak preview of the honeymoon."

She grabbed his hand and tore off, his laughs echoing off the walls of the old office. Neither noticed the man in the balcony.

'_Davis was the least of your worries, Clark. I am the true villain of this story...and our destiny together...is only beginning_,' mused Lex Luthor.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. Could it be Lex's grand reveal come Finale? It's how I woulda done it, haha. I imagine this leading up to the wedding, where Lex may or may not make his grand appearance. Obviously, it goes against the continuity that I have in this story, but we all knew that was going to happen anyways. It should still fit into my continuity though, as they go on to have a happy wedding and then Clark meets Lex sometime later.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Christopher Kent_.


	137. Chris

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - I missed you guys too! haha. You folks are what get me through the day at work! I thought you might like the idea of Lois on Red-K, haha, even if you hate that I had Chloe jump in and stop them before Clark could make things even worse as Kal, haha. Who knows what might have happened if those two got loose again without anyone there to stop them, haha. They might paint the Daily Planet red! hahaha.

I thought it was a great episode, though I would have preferred to have more of the current story revealed. What the hell happened between Lionel and Darkseid?What's going to happen with Oliver being infected? I want to know these things! haha. I could definitely go for a Lois Lane/Tess Mercer sandwich, haha. I won't even try to deny it. You take Lois from _Crimson_ and Tess from _Kent_, talk about the bow chicka bow wow, hahaha.

Though it doesn't even compare to the original trilogy, the prequel trilogy were still enjoyable for me because I loved seeing how these people became the people that we know and love. It was never going to live up to expectations, but they added some great stuff to the mythos and that was enough for me. But you are 100% right, Ewan McGregor was the best thing about those prequels besides a CGI Yoda, haha. That was pretty awesome too. And yes, whoever wants to play Superman just needs to watch the tapes over and over and over and over again! haha.

I wanted to save it for Mothers' Day, but I wanted to make up the delays to you guys, and I really like that chapter so I posted it. I'll try and come up with another great moment for a Mothers' Day chapter. It'll probably feature Mrs. K in some fashion, haha.

For my story, I kind of imagine Darkseid bringing Lex back for Lionel. Then Lex kind of hides out until he takes over LuthorCorp (renaming it LexCorp) and then he kind of runs into Superman and tells him it's open season and his kryptonian ass is in his crosshairs. Though I'm expecting for Lex to crash the wedding maybe, I notice that Clark's outfit looks pretty fancy when he meets Lex again. But hopefully, this chapter can hold up either way.

Well, then I guess that just means I get to the bracelet and the Kawatche people.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Zod/Faora, Jo'an/Chris? haha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #137, Christopher Kent

**Author's Note:** This was just me wanting to include Chris Kent in the story somehow, haha. I hope it still works!

* * *

"Uh...Dad?"

Clark looked around his paper to see Jo'an standing at the front door. Her eyes fixed on the sky. "Yes, Jo'an?"

"You might want to come and see this..."

Exchanging a look with Lois, Clark stood up from the table and walked towards his daughter. Once he reached the door, he followed her eye line to see a dark spot deep up in the sky. Lois joined them at the door, "What is that?" she squinted. "Is that a bird? A plane?"

"That's no bird, Mom."

Clark used his micro-vision to get a closer look, "It's a ship."

The girls turned to him, "A ship?" they asked in unison.

He began to pull his tie loose from his collar when Lois started to unbutton his shirt, he gave her a funny look that made her blush.

"What? It's a force of habit."

Clark let out a laugh and stepped out the door, launching into the sky above. Lois looked down at Jo'an, who was smirking. "What?"

"You just can't keep your hands to yourself, can you, Mom?"

Lois groaned, "Alright you little monster, go eat the rest of your pancakes before your idiot friend come over and eats them all."

"Mom! How many times do I have to tell you? Bobo isn't an idiot, he's just easily distracted."

The elder Lane-Kent rolled her eyes, "You and Kara can say that as many times as you want...the boy is an idiot with a bottomless pit for a stomach."

Jo'an giggled, "Bobo does like to eat."

On the other side of town, Clark was easing the ship to the ground with a soft thud. Before he could react further, the hatch opened to reveal a small boy sitting within the ship. He looked beyond scared. Clark couldn't blame him, he wondered if he had been equally as terrified.

"Are you ok?" asked Clark. "Are you hurt?"

The boy shock his head, causing something to rattle around his neck. Clark leaned forward and found a pair of dog tags. "Lor-Zod?"

"Zod is my father," the little boy explained.

"_General_ Zod?"

The boy nodded. "He isn't very nice though." Clark frowned at the boy's tone. "My mother says I was born there. That's why I could leave."

"Leave what?

"The Phantom Zone."

"Why would they send you away?"

The boy hung his head a bit, "My father said so that he could see if it could be done."

This sent Clark reeling. If what this boy was telling him was the truth, then Zod and Faora had managed to produce a child _within_ the Phantom Zone. And if this child could exit the Phantom Zone, then that left bone chilling possibilities for Zod to do the same.

"Are you Kal-El?"

Clark frowned, "How do you know that name?"

The boy shrugged, "You move like I can move. My father talked about a man like us that lived on this planet. He said his name was Kal-El."

"Yes...I am Kal-El, but you can call me Clark."

"My father says that you're a bad man, Clark. Is that true?"

Clark's jaw dropped. "Of course not. I am a good person. Your father and I just don't see eye-to-eye."

The boy smiled, "You don't seem like a bad man, Clark."

Sirens could be heard in the distance. Clark looked back at the boy and made a gut decision. He was going to help the boy, not matter what his last name might be or who his father might be. He picked up the boy and the two jetted off to the Kent Farm. Walking through the front door, Lois had a wide eyed expression as she saw Clark enter the kitchen with a young boy in tow. "Uh...who's the kid?"

"He was in the ship, oh, the ship. Lois, can you watch him while I go move it before the police get there?"

Before she could respond, Clark tore off out the door out towards the horizon. Lois turned to see the boy hiding behind the counter.

Lois leaned down with a smile, "You don't have to hide from me, you know that, right?"

"I got scared."

She gave him a warm look, "Well, you don't have to be scared of me. We're the good guys around here, Kiddo."

He frowned, "Kiddo?"

"It's just a...never mind...so, what is your name, little guy?"

The boy looked at her shyly, and mumbled his name. Lois chucked, "I can't hear you."

"Lor-Zod."

Lois frowned, "Do you like that name?"

He shook his head, which only caused a grin erupted on her face. "Well, I'll tell you what. I'm pretty good with names, even named a few heroes here and there if you'd believe it. Why don't I give you a brand new name for around here, you think you would like that?"

The boy shrugged.

"How about..." Lois put a finger to her lips, a smile dancing across them, "...Christopher? We'll call you Chris for sort."

A small smile formed on the boy's face, "I'd like that. It's like Clark's name."

The shutting of the door as Clark returned, "You two seem to be getting along."

Lois looked up, "You know how awesome I am with kids, Smallville."

Clark let out a laugh, "I seem to recall you telling a boy that was picking on Jo'an that he would never grow and would have to work for the Santa at the mall."

"He shouldn't have tried to cut my baby's hair."

"You can't cut her hair anyways, Lois."

"That's not the point!"

Chris shifted nervously in his chair, causing Lois and Clark to snap out of their haze. They begun to talk about his origins, listening to Chris tell his story of how he made it from the Phantom Zone and to Earth. It was becoming more and more clear the whole time that they were going to have to do something to protect the boy, both from the world and from Zod in the future. They just didn't know what that was yet.

Clark exchanged a glance with Lois that told him it was time for them to talk in private.

"Hey, Buddy? Why don't you go play with Krypto and Shelby? Me and Lois need to talk about some stuff."

Chris nodded, tearing off into the field where the two dogs were playing with each other. Clark stood near the door watching him while Lois leaned against the counter with a smile. It was like Conner all over again, except this wasn't a teenage boy that they could just pass off. This was a young boy that didn't know the first thing about life as a human. This was a young boy that would need the guidance the Kents gave Clark.

"I don't know what to do."

Lois frowned, "What do you mean you don't know what to do?"

Clark let out a sigh, "Do we keep him? It would seem wrong not to, but that's not our son."

"Chris isn't our son, but what else are we going to do? Send him back to the Phantom Zone? We can't do that, Clark."

He nodded, "I can't send him back to a father like Zod. But what are we going to tell people, Lois? That we found him in a field?"

Lois smirked, "It worked for your folks, didn't it?"

Clark rolled his eyes as he made his decision, "Chris! Come in here, I want you to meet somebody."

In a flash, the boy was standing at Clark side. He chuckled softly, wondering if he had surprised his father the same way when he was a boy. Clark led Chris into the living room where Jo'an was waiting to meet the boy. She looked rather eager about the notion.

"Jo'an, I want you to meet Chris. He's like us, and he's going to be staying with us for a while."

The young girl walked over and gave him an enthusiastic handshake, something that Chris didn't really comprehend the meaning to.

"I'm Jo'an. You wanna play with some of my toys? My Uncle Bruce sends me the bestest toys," she offered.

Chris smiled and nodded, making his way towards the stairs. Lois and Clark turned back to the kitchen when Jo'an grabbed her mother's sleeve.

"Hey Mom?" Lois turned and frowned, "Chris is kinda cute, dontcha think?"

Without another word, Jo'an sped up the stairs towards her room to go play with the new housemate. Lois turned back to Clark with a smirk.

"Like mother like daughter, huh?"

Clark groaned before letting out a laugh, "I'm already regretting this. Before you know it, she'll be going back and forth between kissing and killing him."

Lois leaned up to give Clark a quick peck on the lips, "Oh, I don't know what you're complaining about. Worked out pretty well for you."

She turned on her heel and walked in the kitchen with a skip in her step, causing Clark to grin.

"Yeah...things worked out pretty well for me alright."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. Christopher Kent is one of the most interesting characters in the comics, and really is considered the foster son of Clark Kent and Lois Lane. He is the biological son of Zod and Ursa (Smallville's Faora) that they produced in the Phantom Zone and was thus able to leave the zone, he has since gone on to disown his Zod heritage and has become the hero Nightwing (named after the same kryptonian hero that inspired Dick Grayson's alter ego identity). He's just an all around cool character to me.

Anyways, it was kind of hard to cover this all in one chapter, but hopefully it works. Let me know what you thought! haha.

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, maybe '_Robin the Boy Wonder_'?


	138. Robin

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - That's a brilliant idea! Wow, seriously, you guys are going to put me out of business if you ever write your own stories! hahaha. And I can already see how I can connect that chapter with my sequel to "Legion Ring", haha. Now I'm excited! I'm glad that you liked Chris, he's pretty much the closest thing that Clois has to a king in the comics because Lois really does consider Chris her son.

**_Jaclyn Parker_** - I'm glad you liked it! I think I'd set that moment at the end of _Prophecy_ as the final scene so that we can jump right into Lex Luthor bad ass-ness for _the Finale_, haha. I want to see him already! I want Lex Luthor back dammit! hahaha. But yeah, I'm going to miss these guys!

I'm glad that you liked having Chris show up! haha. A ways back, someone (probably more than one someones, haha) mentioned that they want to see what would happen if Jo'an met a boy that she liked. My first thought was Billy Batson, but I already had him appear long before Jo'an is born and he would be in his late teens by this time. Then I thought, well, maybe Chris can be more son-in-law than foster-son? haha.

I don't know, it's going to be interesting to see how it turns out. I was worried that that would be weird, kind of like Tess/Clark in Earth-2 where it's almost incest, you know? But people seem to be pretty positive so far, so we shall see. It's kind of hard to do stuff with Chris because in the comics he ages so crazily and jumps from being a little boy to an adult so fast. And I hope that I can live up to expectations for Mother's Day! haha. It should be fun!

_**cathy03**_ - I would like to think that we'll get as much Lex as possible, but you're probably right. The only thing that makes me wonder is that Kelly Saunders (at least I think it was her) said that things might not go silky smooth on the wedding day, and part of me hopes that means Lex shows up. I certainly don't want Darkseid to show up and have all hell break loose, that would break my heart. At least Lex will just be a douche, haha.

That's easily one of my favorite line from Michael Rosenbaum, but "Our friendship is going to be the stuff of legends" takes the cake. Love that line. I love Chris Kent too because he's the comics version of a Clois baby, haha. I wondered about that as well, and I thought maybe they'd do the Darth Vader thing and have the baby survive somehow to become Chris, but nothing ever came of it. I'm glad that you dig my Chris Kent though, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, I can't imagine dealing with Clois as parents! I think it will never get resolved to be honest. Clark and Lex are destined to be at odds with one another for the duration of each other's lives. There has been abandonment and betrayal on both sides, they are just arch-nemisises as this point.

_**Ina100years**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! Though, with a lot of these chapters, it'll almost certainly be AU by the end. Still! We've had our fun! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I don't know how we do it, but I know exactly what you mean. I'm so excited to see the big finish, but I can't stand the idea that it won't be back come fall. I just have to keep faith that someday, somehow, we will see this group together again. It's all that's keeping me sane! haha. I'll still be at it for a while after _the Finale_, haha, I've got too many chapters to go not to make it! haha.

The decision would have been hard if not for the fact that both Lois and Clark have met Zod. No one deserves a father like him. In the comics, she was much more apprehensive about Chris, but ultimately decided it was the right thing for the boy and for them. I have to admit, the whole idea of introducing Chris was predicated on having someone for the guys to give hell to in the event that Jo'an swoons over him, haha. Especially dear Bobo, hahaha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Yeah, you! hahaha. You've gotta focus! hahaha. And wow, you must have be like a super-genius, haha. My last semester, I think I took Women Studies and Bartending, hahaha. Maybe I need to check to see if I went to a real school, hahaha.

I don't know how she found him, but it makes me think of that scene from _Greek_ where Cappie is asking Beaver for the stud-finder and he doesn't know what it is so he points a pencil towards himself and goes, "beep beep beep!", haha. I have no idea how it connects, but it makes me picture Lois running around with a low jack on Clark that she calls her stud-finder, hahaha. I can just see her hunched over, knocking people over, haha.

They are such cliched lines, but I love them so much! hahaha. It's that call-back, reference, tease thing that I love so much. Like when Christopher Reeve looked at the Phone Booth in _Superman: The Movie_ and kind of scoffed, haha. I was such a happy nerd! hahaha. Hey, it's Clark's super-power, he can call it what he likes, hahahaha. I loved that line, haha. And oh, yes, Bobo gets jealous. Bobo gets _very_ jealous, hahaha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - Haha, I love to hear that! haha. While the show and the comics are not always in line with one another, I think that we can all get at least a little bit of our fix by enjoying the stories that will continue to be written when the show is gone. They've already added Chloe into the comics, and the head writer for DC Comics is Geoff Johns who has written three Smallville Episodes (_Legion_, _Absolute Justice Pt 1 & 2,_ and _Booster_), so I think that there is a good chance that we'll see more bits and pieces get added in down the road.

If Superman gets to look like Christopher Reeve, can Lois Lane please look like Erica Durance? hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - They really haven't. _Superman Returns_ is about as far as they go with Clois from what I can remember. They continue to pull their punches in that area because it makes for the romantic drama that apparently people think you have to have. I would much rather watch Lois be the person who gives Clark the strength to be Superman than watch her be the damsel in distress who doesn't realize whats behind the glasses.

I'm glad that you liked Chris, haha. And yeah, I think they ought to prove to be quite the interesting family, haha. I'm not sure where Chris fits in long-term, I have a planned chapter that will see him reappear as Bobo's nemesis though, hahaha.

I was disappointed with the lack of progression with Lionel/Darkseid and of course the future appearance of Lex as well. They must have something up their sleeves if they feel comfortable going this route though, so I'm just going to keep having faith, haha. It's going to be hard to pull off a Finale that makes all of the Smallville fans happy, but as long as Lex is back and Tom Welling dons the suit, I think I will be pretty happy.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Diana/Bruce, mentions of Conner/Cassie, and mentions of Dick/Barbara

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #138, Robin the Boy Wonder

**Author's Note: **It's a little on the short side, at least compared to the normal length, but I think it'll still be enjoyable! haha.

* * *

"According to the urban legend, Nightwing and Firebird were two of Krypton's greatest heroes. Not unlike Batman and Robin," smiled Clark.

Both Dick and Conner seemed to be on the edge of their seats, "And then what happened?"

Before Clark could continue, Bruce and Diana walked past the room. All three stopped and watched the two say their goodbyes.

"Next time, we're going to Paradise Island. I don't want to deal with a petty thief stealing you away mid-dinner again," she teased.

Bruce grinned, "And Paradise Island is any better? Every time I come to visit, they looked at me like they want to kill me for being a man."

Diana's smile changed into a cheeky smirk, "But the beach offers a wonderful opportunity for me to wear my bikini."

In a rare moment that left Clark Kent in shock, Bruce Wayne seemed to be speechless.

"Uh...uh...uh...that'd be nice."

Diana's face lit up, she had to will herself to play hard-to-get for a moment, "I thought you might say that."

She gave him a quick yet meaning kiss goodbye, leaving Bruce standing in the doorway watching Alfred help her into his car.

"He's got it so bad," chuckled Dick.

Conner laughed, "Cassie says that Diana is just as bad."

Dick gave Clark a nudge, "You think she ties him up with the Lasso of Truth?"

He snorted as both Dick and Conner broke into snickers. Bruce approached them with a knowing smile, "The Lasso joke?"

Clark nodded, "The Lasso joke."

Bruce rolled his eyes and gave Dick a stern look, "You want me to go tell her the joke too? Seems unfair that she doesn't get to enjoy it too."

Dick went very pale, very quickly.

"I'm uh...she's uh...nah...we're good."

The billionaire nodded with a smirk, "That's what I thought."

Clark let out a laugh, "You guys crack me up...scared of a girl."

All three turned and looked at him with wild looks of confusion. Clark frowned, "What?"

"That's pretty funny coming from the most whipped guy on the East Coast," quipped Bruce.

Conner laughed before nudging Dick, "Why just the East Coast?"

Dick shrugged while both Bruce and Clark turned to the younger heroes, "Oliver."

"Ooooooh," the duo replied.

"I...am not whipped."

Bruce shook his head slowly, "Oh Clarkie...you're so cute sometimes. All Lois has to do is say jump, and you ask into which 'sphere."

Conner nodded, "It's true, dude. And let's face it, you're more scared of Lois than you are of Zod."

Clark's mouth hung open. "I'm am not..._scared_...of Lois."

"You remember the time that you mistook that old lady for Lois at the restaurant and you were freaking out that Lois was going to kill you?" asked Dick.

Conner stepped in before Clark could reply, "But he did feed her that line about how he was just thinking about growing old with her, so she kissed him.

"Guys! I'm not scared of Lois Lane!"

Bruce shook his head with a laugh, "Why don't we just call Lois and find out the truth of the matter, shall we?"

He dug into his pocket for his phone but became distracted as he started to sniff, "Does anybody...do you...do you smell smoke?"

He looked down to see his jacket had caught on fire down by his feet, he started to dance as he tried to put it out. "Dammit, Kent!"

Conner and Dick tried to muffle their laughter while Clark smirked. "Don't mess with a guy with heat vision, Wayne."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well? What did you guys think? haha. I wanted to have a bit where the guys make fun of Bruce because let's face it, the guy is a natural born playboy. And now he's all smitten for Wonder Woman? hahaha. That's just hilarious!

Anyways, it became this, and I hope that you liked it. Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I think it's going to be _Gotham City_, but I'm not sure yet. I've got like four or five stories that are halfway done, _Gotham_ is one of them, but it's also one that I've worked on most recently, and usually that means it'll get done first, haha.


	139. Clois Apartment

**Review Comments:**

_**brodieresa**_ - I'm glad to hear that you're still liking them! I hope I haven't spoiled anything for you! haha. I forget that some people aren't as obsessive as me and some of our other readers, haha. We really are going to die without our beloved Clois! haha.

And yes, Nathan Fillion is literally, the Captain. He's just the Man. And I'm going to tell you something, I watch _Two Guys, A Girl, and A Pizza Place_ all the time since I bought one of the bootleg DVD sets. Ryan Reynolds and Nathan Fillion need to team up again!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Well, this chapter was inspired by you! Bask in the glory! hahaha. I think I'll have to incorporate that into a chapter, haha. Lois daydreams about being the Queen of the World, haha. She makes Zod kneel before her and everything, hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - I was never on the Superman/Wonder Woman boat, haha. I will admit, my exposure to Wonder Woman was very limited growing up. She just didn't attract the reader in me, no matter how much she attracted the teenage boy in me, haha. I really preferred her as a member of the JLA, much like the Flash and Green Lantern, because the way she was around the other heroes. And to be honest, I wasn't a big fan of Superman either. Those two just had too many powers. That's why I loved Batman and the X-Men so much, they seemed more real to me in that way.

But over the years, my perspective of Superman has changed. I stopped seeing him as _Superman_ and started to see him as _Clark Kent_. That changed the whole dynamic for me. But we're talking about pairings, haha. My Batman/Wonder Woman preference grew from their kiss in JLA: Obsidian Age, her speech in JLA Vol 1 #90, and of course the big poster from Blackest Night where they were kissing, haha.

I hate that you brought up that because that's a really good point, why isn't Ironside coming back? Maybe he is and we just don't know it, haha. Yep, that's what I'm going to say, haha. Either way, one week we will get to find out! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, this is how it works, haha. Nightwing and Flamebird were two of Krypton's greatest heroes. Some of the stories have Nightwing as a vigilante without Flamebird as his partner. Clark tells the story to a Dick when he is Robin, and when Dick decides to go off and become his own hero without Batman, he recalls the story and becomes Nightwing. Chris Kent also goes on to be Nightwing with Thara Ak-Var becoming Flamebird.

Though now Dick Grayson is Batman. Confused yet? hahaha.

Oh no, guys talk about it just as much as girl's do, but it's just who is the most whipped and stuff, haha. We think we don't sound girly, but we so do. We are just as bad as girls, haha. We just refuse to admit it. And yes, Bruce is very smitten, haha.

**_sasslady_** - Haha, I should have made that the final line! hahaha. That would have be perfect!

_**Katlynne**_ - Haha, I would just drink before my biology class so that I could stay awake, hahaha. I would listen to the guy lecture us for two hours straight and just laugh about all the weird things he would talk about, haha. The tests were almost completely out of the book, like the post-chapter questions? So I would just memorize them and get a B easily, haha. I can't stand chemistry though, haha. I burn myself too easily, hahaha.

You totally just wrote a future chapter for me just then, haha. And yeah, I love it when Tom Welling pulls out some banter from his back pocket, haha. You never know though, maybe someone will let it slip like Bart did to Oliver, hahaha.

**_NeverSayNever95_** - I'm glad you liked it, haha. Bruce always has a line up his sleeve, so yeah, speechless Bruce is pretty funny, haha. And aww, I'm glad that I'll be a source of "getting your fix" when the show ends, haha. Tells me I'm doing something right, while being true to the show, haha.

_**Redkclois**_ - Already in the works, haha. I'm glad that you like my stuff, and oh boy, haha, you're going to make me blush!

_**alexindigo**_ - Hahaha, I'm glad that I could make you laugh! haha. And yeah, I know that they have to make some drama for the show or the movies, but is it really necessary to make her incapable of handling herself? The real Lois Lane will totally kick your ass, haha. That's why she has the respect of the entire league and Superman's love. She's supposed to be his equal in that way. She isn't a damsel at all.

Yeah, they need to shore up on that. They've really slacked with Lois even though I do like seeing her being the emotional backup for him. Her role in Beacon was awesome for me. I loved seeing her as the one that gives Clark the strength to be who he needs to be. I wish that they had done a better job with Mary Jane as well. I wrote a Spiderman script ages ago and I had both MJ and Gwen Stacy in them, and MJ was clearly the "I can handle my own stuff" girl and Gwen was the damsel. Because let's face it, some are bad asses and some of them are story pushers, haha. MJ and Lois are not story pushers.

_**JaclynParker**_ - My friends are downright filthy sometimes, haha, so I hear you loud and clear. I just have to tone it down for the actual story, haha. I might have to write a chapter where Clark pisses off someone, and they tell Lois what he said that day, hahaha. Ala Bart vs. Oliver, haha.

There is definitely a "girl's night out" chapter in the works, as well as a Younger Crowd (Cassie, Courtney, Bart, Conner, and Dick) vs an Older Crowd (Lois, Tess, Clark, Bruce, Diana, Oliver, and Chloe) chapter coming up, haha. I think you guys will have some fun with it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with the wonderful idea coming from h-g-j-l-e-r-k.

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #139, Clois's Apartment

**Author's Note: **I'm sorry it's so late guys! Been crazy busy! But I'll tell you what, I'm going to post both chapters for Thursday and Friday today, as well as two chapters for Saturday and Sunday in a little while since I'll be up visiting my internet-less mom for Mother's Day, plus a Bonus Chapter! haha. Deal? haha.

* * *

Lois stormed down to the bullpen after her interview with Mayor Reeve. "Olsen!

She glanced around to see that he was gone, Jeff sitting on the other side of Jimmy's desk.

'_Where are you, you little pain? You better not be steaming up the supply closet with my sister, that is this Lane's spot_,' she fumed.

She could almost hear Clark in the back of her head, '_Lane-**Kent**, Dear_.'

"I think he ran off to do that Superman story with Clark," explained Jeff.

Lois rolled her eyes, "I'm sure. Can you tell him that his ass is mine for not covering _my_ story today?"

Jeff gulped, "Uh...yeah...I can do that..."

She turned to leave when Jeff stumbled out of his chair to catch up with her, "Ms. Lane?"

Lois turned with a quirked eyebrow, Jeff gulped again.

"I think that Clark forgot this down here earlier...he was sitting at my desk, actually...he looked kind of..._lost_..."

She looked down to see Clark's _Smallville High_ letterman's jacket in Jeff's sweaty hand. She couldn't help but roll her eyes.

"I swear, if that boy's head wasn't attached to his shoulder, he'd lose that too."

Jeff laughed, "Well, he _is_ Clark, Ms. Lane. He's not exactly Superman, you know?"

Lois smiled, "Nope. He sure isn't." She was about four feet away when she spun on her heel, "And Jeff?"

He turned.

"It's Lane-_Kent_...Mrs...Lane-Kent."

Jeff nodded nervously before sprinting back towards his desk for cover. '_Why can't she play the kill-me-or-kiss-me game with me? Why do I always get kill?_'

His eyes popped open, '_Please god, I hope Clark never knows I just thought that...then he's going to kill me like Richard in Foreign Affairs!_'

When Lois arrived at her apartment to get dressed before dinner at seven, she saw Clark changing out of his super-suit.

"Why can you be so slow when you have super-speed?"

Clark turned and smiled, "It makes me feel normal to do things slowly."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Well, does that also include forgetting stuff? Because you left this in the bullpen."

He eyed the jacket in her hands, "Is that my _Smallville High_ jacket?"

"Yeah, Jeff had it when I went looking for Jimmy in the bullpen. Which by the way, your ass is mine too for stealing my photographer, I mean seriously, wait, where are you going? Smallville!" she shouted as he walked into the bedroom in a near-daze.

He emerged with an identical jacket in his hand. Her eyes narrowed as his eyes expanded with realization. "Oh..."

"When did you get another jacket made up?"

"I didn't."

"Then how..."

It was her turn to have her eyes expand with realization, "That's why you kept talking about getting back! That was...you son of a bitch."

Clark's jaw dropped open, "What?"

"You were flirting with me! You, young you, the past you! You were giving me the Kent Eyebrow Dance!"

"You flirted with younger me?"

Now it was Lois who had the jaw drop look, "Don't you dare get jealous for me flirting with younger you! It was still you! I haven't forgotten about you and that little witch, you know? So don't get all high and mighty on me, Smallville."

"She had a tray of coffees and asked if I wanted to grab a coffee. I thought she meant off the tray, I didn't know she meant a coffee date!"

Lois gave him a stern look, "Uh huh...whatever you say, Kent."

Clark rolled his eyes, "You're a Kent too, you know that, right?"

"_Lane_-Kent! Lane-_freaking_-Kent!"

He couldn't help but chuckle, "It's not my fault that younger me totally had the hots for you, Lois."

Her eyebrows shot up into her bangs as she tried to keep her composure, "...you think he did?"

'_Game...Set...Match..._' he smirked.

"Sweetheart, of course he did. You've always been beautiful, and you just get even more beautiful as each day passes," he told her as he stepped near her.

Lois felt her knees give, but luckily, Clark was there to scoop her up.

"I remember it like it was yesterday...we shared that kiss on the rooftop, pulled me close-"

"Rock your world?" she asked with a hopeful expression.

Clark laughed, "Rocked my universe."

Once again her knees gave out, "Oh..._Smallville_..."

Their lips met for a steamy kiss that made the one from the rooftop look PG. Hands roamed and tongues dueled, but then Lois jerked back.

"Clark! This is exactly like the thing with Conner!"

He frowned, "What thing with Conner?"

If he didn't know any better, he would have thought her heat vision was warming up. "When you taught him how to use the Legion ring?"

For a moment, he didn't seem to recall what she was talking about. And then...his eyes got really big.

"Uh oh..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. This chapter will lead into the flashback of when Clark taught Conner how to use the Legion ring, which will be an expanded version of the 'Legion Ring' chapter from Lois's perspective. Which funnily enough, is the next chapter: _Cassie_.

h-g-j-l-e-r-k gave me the idea for the chapter, so you guys know who to thank. I was already writing _Cassie_ when the idea came up, so it all fit together like a charm and gave it that little connection that I love to have between chapters! haha. I hope you guys liked it!

Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Cassie_.


	140. Cassie

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Conner/Cassie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #140, Cassandra Sandsmark

**Author's Note:** This one takes place during '_Legion Ring_' and begins with the end of '_Clois's Apartment_'. Enjoy!

* * *

"Clark! This is exactly like the thing with Conner!"

He frowned, "What thing with Conner?"

If he didn't know any better, he would have thought her heat vision was warming up. "When you taught him how to use the Legion ring?"

For a moment, he didn't seem to recall what she was talking about. And then...his eyes got really big.

"Uh oh..."

_**a few weeks earlier. . . .**_

"Are you sure about this? Won't time travel kind of mess with the way things go?"

Clark smiled warmly, "Are you scared that I'm going to change us? That we're not going to fall in love?"

Lois looked away and tried to play dumb, "I have no idea what you're talking about, Smallville."

He chuckled, "There is nothing in this world that could keep me from falling in love with you, Lois."

She looked up at him with an innocent expression, "Promise?"

Instead of answering, Clark leaned down to give her a kiss that made her toes curl. "What do you think?"

She took a few moments to respond. Her mind was still fuzzy after that kiss.

"Geeze, Smallville, I know," she muttered as she punched his arm. "Quit being such a girl."

Clark laughed and turned to Conner, "You read-"

His question was cut off when he saw Conner and Cassie stretched out across the couch making out. Lois nudged him.

"Ours was better...right?" Clark had to bite back a laugh, Lois blushed. "What? I'm not trying to compete..." she saw his face. "...I'm not!"

Her shout was enough to startle Conner and Cassie. Both of whom were blushing profusely at Conner's kinda-sorta-foster parents.

"Sorry," muttered Conner.

Cassie didn't say a word, just kept her gaze intent on the carpet. She tried not to think of all the times that she and Conner had been on this floor.

Lois watched the girl as she wondered about his foster son's girlfriend with great interest. She followed her gaze, and blushed when she thought of all the times that she and Clark had been on this floor.

"Are you ready?" asked Clark.

Conner nodded.

The two stepped closer as Clark pulled the legion ring out of his pocket. "Alright, so we have to be really careful with this. Changing any little detail could change the whole future. We can't get involved in anything or really even talk to anyone. We have to be invisible."

Conner rolled his eyes, "I've got this, ok?"

"I'm just trying to make sure that you know-"

"I know."

"I know you know, I just want to-"

"Can we go already?"

"Not until-"

Conner grew tired of their bickering and went to grab the ring from Clark's hand, "Clark, I've got this!"

When the two hands met, there was a flash and they were gone.

Both Cassie and Lois rocked on their feet with their hands tucked in their jeans, awkward silence filled the room.

"So..." started Lois, trying to break the silence.

Cassie nodded ackwardly, "Yeah..."

Lois kind of grimaced and looked away for a moment, "So, how's that Teen Titan thing coming along? Kara says you guys are doing well."

"Yeah, it's pretty good. Doesn't hurt that Conner and Bart are there, they're pretty fun."

Lois gave her an unconvinced look, "Yeah...Bart...he's just _super_ fun. Hope you guys like to eat."

Before Cassie could respond, there was a flash of light that left Conner and Clark sprawled out across the floor. Clark stood up and was giving Conner a very angry look, "I told you that you weren't ready to do it on your own. You have to be careful!"

"I said I was sorry! Besides, for Mr. '_we need to be invisible_', you sure looked chummy with Lois!"

Clark was about to retort when he heard Lois behind him, "What?"

He shot Conner a glare, to which Conner grimaced. Clark turned and smiled warmly at Lois.

"Lois, Honey, Dear...it's so good to see you."

She gave him a look, "You're being to sweet. What did you do?"

"Who? Me? I didn't do-"

"Smallville."

Clark gulped, "Uh...well, when I got sent back...me and Conner didn't exactly end up in the same places..."

She narrowed her eyes as Conner backed up towards the back door, "And..."

"And uh...I kind of...well, really...it was more you...ran into me...so really...it's not my fault."

"What's not your fault?"

Clark began to sweat as Lois began to step closer and her eyes became scarier, "Uh...we might have uh...talked...a little bit..."

Conner snorted, "Looked like you were about to do more than that."

Clark sent him a look that made Conner immediately wish that he hadn't opened his mouth. Lois became intrigued, "When was it you went back to?"

"Uh..." Clark's mouth became very dry, "It's hard to say."

"You still had blonde hair," offered Conner, doing his best to help.

Clark clenched his eyes shut, that was not going to help him one damn bit.

"Blonde...Wait...was I still living at the farm?

Clark made a face that told her yes.

"Wait...I thought that was a fantasy! Are you saying that was _you_? Smallville! What the hell?"

Clark grimaced and shot Conner a glare. Conner flinched.

"Do you realize how crazy that drove me? That's why I decided to go back to brown hair!"

Clark let a goofy grin form on his face, "Really?"

"That's not the point!"

Conner grabbed Cassie's hand and led her out the back door without either Clark or Lois noticing. Once outside, they broke into laughter.

"Clark is so dead," laughed Cassie.

Conner's brow twisted in confusion, "What?"

"Did you see them back there? Lois is going to have his head hanging on the mantle."

"Uh...no...we kind of need to get out of here for a couple hours."

Cassie frowned, "Because she's going to kill him?"

"Not exactly..." he muttered, a look spread across his face like he was trying to get an image out of his head, "Oh god..."

Suddenly, they heard a crash in the house and Conner looked up to see clothes flying from the ground and into the air. He shuddered.

"We have to get out of here...now!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did it meet expectations? haha. I wanted to incorporate some of the Conner/Cassie stuff into this one because it'll get played up later on in future chapters and of course the sister-story that I'll be writing when I'm done with this. Beyond that, I always wondered why Lois was blonde (though I know now that it was because she was supposed to contrast against Lana) and then went brunette later on. Here's why, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Phantom Zone_.


	141. Phantom Zone

**Review Comments: I missed you guys so much! hahaha.**

_**A,sky**_ - And five chapters this time! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked Chris, and yes, I might be doing that a bit more in the future just because it's kind of funny when it works out like that, haha. And yeah, who doesn't love it when a cocky playboy is brought down to our level? hahaha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, oh believe me, Clark isn't going to forget about that, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, hopefully this is even better? haha. If you like the Clois PDA, I think you'll like this one then, haha. No Zod in this one, but there will be a General Zod and a Major Zod chapter up ahead that will give you plenty of our favorite military man, haha. I didn't catch it! But I did hear about it, and it sounds like it was pretty awesome, haha. I'm going to have to find it online or something!

_**Katlynne**_ - I loved the Clois scene in _Prophecy_! Uh...of course not...day dreaming about Lois? Psh...You be talking crazy, lady, hahahaha. I think Conner might get the impatientness from Lois, hahaha. She's got a soft spot for Bart deep down, haha. You know, just...deeper than others...haha. Yeah, I know, but it's more fun to think that Clark turned her brunette, isn't it? hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - I have a review down below! I was mostly interested in X-Men, Batman, and Spiderman as a young boy because those were the comics that had the good animated series on TV. And as a kid, TV was just more fun than reading, haha. But over the years, I widened my gaze, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Haha, we shall see what happens to Richard, haha. Hint Hint, Jimmy and Clark team up for the win! hahaha. I saw _Prohecy_, and as usual, Erica Durance was simply wonderful. I too am wondering how it's all going to come together, but that's half the fun, isn't it? hahaha. I wish Tom Welling was a better actor, but sometimes, you can't have it all and we've certainly got a lot with Erica, Justin Hartley, and Michael Rosenbaum, haha.

Oh, he's going to get around to that, haha. He won't be forgetting that line, haha. You might have mentioned that you like the way I write them before, haha, I just hope I can keep living up to the expectations! haha.

_**abhilegend**_ - You've given me quite the list there, haha. There probably won't be any Marvel crossovers, but I can tell you about the list that you gave me and let you know which are planned, though I'm sure plenty will be added. It's just a matter of making them fit the theme that makes it tough.

Plastic Man will show up sooner or later, most of the heroes will. Orion, the Forever People, and the New Gods might be a challenge. Guy Gardner will be in the "Lanterns" chapter with the other Green Lanterns. Hippolyta and Donna Troy will be in the "Paradise Island" and/or the "Honeymoon" chapter. Haven't thought of a JSA chapter yet, Doom Patrol is likely, though I wouldn't hold my breath of Kal-L and Lois Lane of Earth-2 because like you said, I kind of made the Earth-2 from Smallville my Earth-2. Perhaps I'll write them from another "Earth"?

Kyle Rayner will be in "Lanterns". Checkmate sounds like an interesting idea. I wouldn't count on Kingdome Come Superman or Superman Prime One-Million, though I have been thinking about a Superboy-Prime chapter. The Atom will probably appear, though i'm not sure what you mean about a not Slade Wilson Deathstroke. Captain Marvel will be in "Captain Marvel", Black Adam probably will too. I've been trying to work Booster in for a while now, and John Henry Irons will have his own chapter. Hadn't thought about Maximoa or All-Star Superman, but Mon-El is on my list. The Legion is a pretty big group, haha.

_**RedKClois**_ - Hahaha, I'm glad that I could make you laugh!

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, yeah, i think he might have accidentally seen too much over the years, haha. I think that it's all going to work out, and I think that Clark is going to stand his ground and show up to the wedding and just charm her down the aisle, hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with the wonderful idea spawned from h-g-j-l-e-r-k and Jaclyn Parker.

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #141, the Phantom Zone (for Saturday)

**Author's Note:** I'm so sorry guys! I intended to post Phantom Zone, Gotham City, and a Bonus chapter on friday for being gone all weekend, but I just didn't get them done in time by the time I had to be on the road! Then I got puppy-dog-eyed into staying an extra day, and was just beat by the time I got home sunday night (more like monday morning, haha). An insane Monday later, here I am. Hopefully this will make it up to you guys! And I promise we're back to normal!

Oh, by the way, did I mention that this is the first of five new chapters being posted...now? hahaha.

* * *

Clark walked around the new apartment, looking at everything in it's place. Everything from Old Blue to his plaid in _their_ closet.

'_Our closet_,' he mused. '_I knew that she loved my plaid..._'

He was still reeling from finding out that he was gone for three weeks. It had felt like so little time within the Zone, it never even occurred to him that he had been gone for so long. Not until he had seen the apartment. Not until he had seen the tears welled up in her eyes.

"She was so strong..." he whispered.

"Well, not _Man of Steel_ strong," laughed a voice from behind.

Clark turned to see Lois standing behind him. Unfortunately, she had taken the time to put on pants.

"I can't believe..."

"What? Is this about the Whitesnake pillow again? Because I'm going to kick your bulletproof butt if it is," she teased.

He let out a laugh, "No. It's not about that. I can't believe you had so much faith in me."

Lois shrugged, "You're my hero. It's what I do."

"No...Lois...you are _my_ hero."

She couldn't help but grin. "Smallville..."

"Three weeks, Lois. I remember when you were gone for three weeks. I lost all...all the things that you're so proud of me about. I abandoned my friends. I gave up my real name. I was a shell of myself. But you? You were strong. You were the real Woman of Steel."

Lois laughed, "What did you expect? I'm the one that gets to kill you now, Smallville. I'm not giving Zod that-"

He cut her off with a kiss. When they pulled apart, she gave him an electric grin, "What was that for?"

"I want you to come with me somewhere."

She tried to contain her smile, "...anywhere, Smallville."

Clark grabbed her hand, pulled her to her feet, and scooped her up into his arms. In a flash, they were gone. When she opened her eyes, they were...

"A cave?"

He gave her a frown and shook his head, a small smile playing on his face.

"After that speech...you bring me to a cave? Seriously, you need to get a Romance for Dummies book or something."

Clark let out a laugh, "Let me try this one out of the Kent Playbook, then you can tell me what you think about my romance skills."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Make me melt, Smallville."

It was his turn to roll his eyes, but he grabbed her hand and pulled her into the alter room. He picked her up and set her on the alter.

"You're not going to use me as a virgin sacrifice or anything, are you?" she teased.

Clark gave her a kiss, "We both know you're not a virgin, Lois."

She gave him a sultry grin, "Don't I know it."

He turned back before she made him forget what they came for. He walked over to a spot on the wall and pressed his palm to the paint mark. The wall opened to her surprise, and a light erupted in the room. When the light disappeared, Clark eyed Lois with a smirk.

"What?"

He shrugged, "I have a present for you."

"It better not be an axe."

Clark laughed. "When I was a kid, I fell into this cave and met a girl-"

"This better not go the way I think it's going to go."

He rolled his eyes, "She told me the legend of Naman."

"I remember the story."

"The part that I didn't tell you, was that there was a prophecy. And it said that when Naman met his true love...he would give her something."

Lois wagged her eyebrows at him, "I like where this is going."

Clark blushed, "Could you wait a minute?"

Lois laughed, "I just got my fiancee back in our furnished apartment, I want to start christening things."

"We will!" he laughed. "But I'm trying to give you something special!"

"Fine, get on with the story time. What is Naman supposed to give his true love?"

Clark shook his head at her eagerness, "This."

He pulled out a bracelet from behind his back and presented it to her. It was silver with turquoise gems imbedded within it.

"Oh...wow..."

Clark handed it to her, "I want you to have it."

Lois looked up at him with a look that asked him if he was sure.

"You're the one that makes me feel like I can live up to that legend, Lois. You're the one that I need. The one that I've always needed."

She smiled warmly at him, taking the bracelet and slipping it onto her wrist. As she did, the gems began to glow.

"Oh crap, I broke it, what's that supposed to mean?"

Clark laughed, "I think it means that you're the one. I think it means that you're my soulmate."

Lois looked at the bracelet and then back to Clark. "Do you think that it means I'm going to get lucky?"

He couldn't help but close his eyes and shake his head, "You're insatiable, you know that?"

Lois grinned at him.

"You bet, Buddy. Now get up here and lets christen these damn alter already," she commanded.

Clark obliged.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Haha. I wanted to do something that was more intimate with the end of Dominion, and this is what I came up with instead. Thanks to h-g-j-l-e-r-k and Jaclyn Parker, I came up with this. So make sure to show them some love! Anyways, I have a lot of catching up to do, so I'm just going to speed off and finish the rest of the chapter. I think this was all really straight forward, haha.

**Next Up:** _Mother's Day Special_.

**Prophecy Review:** I loved seeing Lois with powers and I loved seeing Captain Cold and the crew even more! I too cringed when Toyman brought up Lana, but I kind of figured he would since the last time we saw him, he was breaking up Clana. THANK YOU TOYMAN! hahaha. Sorry, my inner-Cloiser busted out for a second there. I was sad to see that ending, but from what I saw from the Finale preview, Clark isn't going to take that laying down! haha.


	142. Mother's Day Special

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #142, Mother's Day Special

**Author's Note: **This is a special chapter for Mother's Day. I just want to thank all the mother's out there for being so awesome. I'll be honest, even though I give my mom a hard time, everyone knows that I'm a big momma's boy, haha. And I love her dearly. Even if she's crazy. Hahaha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Mom! Mom! Me and Dad made you a cake!"

Martha eyed the...well...I guess it was kind of like a cake. It just looked like a cake that had gotten dropped a couple times, so technically, it could have been a cake at some point in time. She eyed Jonathan's face with great interest, noticing how he was trying to keep from laughing.

He caught her eye line and threw his hands in the air, "Hey, it was Clark's idea. Wasn't it, Son?"

Clark nodded with a toothy grin, "Sure was. It's your special day! We had to make you a cake! Don't you make us cake on our special days?"

"Well, I supp-"

"Yup. And that's why we made you a cake! It's Mother's Day!"

Martha looked from Jonathan to Clark. "What kind of cake is it, Sweetie?"

Clark shrugged.

She looked at her husband with a quirked eyebrow, "He doesn't know what kind of cake it is?"

Jonathan grimaced, but couldn't keep that smile off his face "It's supposed to be a chocolate cake."

"Supposed to be?"

"Well, we kind of ran out of the chocolate mix, so we used what was left of a couple different mixes you had in the cupboard."

Martha couldn't hold back her laugh as Jonathan opened the trash to show her no less than five or six cake mix boxes.

"Do you want me to blow out your candles, Mom?"

She was so busy laughing, she just kind of nodded at Clark without hearing exactly what he was asking her. He immediately sucked in a breath to blow out the candles, the blast of his exhale was enough to cover his mother in cake and frosting. Something that made Jonathan erupt with laughter.

"Whoops," muttered Clark.

Jonathan quickly grabbed his son's hand and let him outside, "You better get out of here before she kills us, Clark."

Clark nodded and rushed outside the door, his eyes setting on his toy car near the barn.

"If you say...one word...about licking this off of me...you are a dead man, Mr. Kent," she threatened with a smile that totally undermined it.

"Well, that sounds like a death I could live with," he whispered, planting a kiss on her lips.

Suddenly, he pulled back, "You know what? This doesn't taste half bad."

Martha rolled her eyes, "I'm going to take a shower."

Jonathan made to follow her up the stairs.

"Alone!" she laughed. "Go watch, Clark."

He groaned and stomped down the steps, but a grin formed as Martha's shirt landed on his head and laughter sounded from the top of the stairs.

Later on, Martha joined Jonathan on the porch swing as the two watched Clark race around in his toy car.

Martha brushed her wet hair with a towel as she laughed at Clark's race sounds, "It took forever to get this frosting out of my hair."

"I could have helped," he teased.

Martha rolled her eyes, "Can't you wait until our son goes to bed?"

Jonathan smirked at her, "Can you?"

She blushed and rolled her eyes, turning to watch Clark again.

"He's getting pretty good at controlling his powers," observed Jonathan.

Martha went to say something, but all of a sudden, Clark's little feet sped up and he crashed through the side of the barn.

Both jumped up and raced towards the barn, each screaming for their son. They raced through the whole in the wall to see Clark standing with his arms in the air, not a scratch on him. He didn't even seem to realize that something had gone wrong, just proclaiming proudly, "Ta-da!"

Martha let out a laugh as Jonathan shook his head, "I just had to say it, didn't I?"

"I drove like 'red 'linstone, Dad!"

Jonathan picked him up, more than a couple chuckles spewing from his mouth. He rubbed Clark's already wild hair with affection.

"I'm sorry, Son...but you're more like Bam Bam."

Clark immediately shouted, "Bam Bam!"

The two walked over to start picking up the chaos that Clark created. Martha couldn't help but sigh as she saw her two men pick up and begin to fix things.

"I just feel for his poor Pebbles someday, she's not going to know whether to kiss or kill the boy," she mused.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I think it was fun to see the Kents with young Clark, I keep meaning to write a couple young Clark chapters but it's awful hard to come up with ideas to meet the theme sometimes, haha. I have another one in store for later on, but for now, this will do. I know that Clark didn't appear to get super-breath until Sneeze, but how could I not have written that scene when it popped into my head? Can't we just all look the other way and say that Martha forget about this little incident? Just for the sake of the scene? hahaha.

**Next Up:** _Dr. Fate._


	143. Dr Fate

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Bara

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #143, Dr. Fate (for Monday)

**Author's Note:** This chapter is meant to be in a similar vein as the Kent Nelson chapter. I hope that you guys like it!

* * *

"I see your fate, Lois Lane."

She gave him a funny look, but the helmeted hero just kept advancing on her.

"You are the one that he will need. He is the one you will need."

Lois looked at him like he was crazy, "What?"

"The Savior. The one who will heal us all. The sentient power," explained Dr. Fate.

The door flung shut with a clang, causing Lois to jump back with her arms raised. She turned away, wondering what the hell that guy was talking about.

"I wonder if he does horoscopes..."

**many years later...**

Jo'an looked around the room.

Uncle Bruce was perched by the window, his face emotionless. Uncle Ollie was sat on the floor with Aunt Chloe, her eyes still wet with tears. Jo'an could tell that he was biting back a few tears of his own. She glanced over towards Aunt Kara, who was pacing, and Bobo, who was eating comfort food.

She walked over to Oliver, who swallowed deeply and faked a smile, "Hey Joey, what's up?"

Jo'an frowned, "Why are you acting like that?"

"Like what?"

She frowned harder, "Like Daddy isn't hurt."

Oliver looked around the room. Both Diana and Kara shot him sympathetic looks, Bruce on the other hand looked at him steely. Like Oliver should have done a better job at hiding his emotions at that moment. But Jo'an could see right through him though, just like she could see through Bruce's mask.

"I know you're scared, Uncle Ollie. You don't have to act like you're not."

He had to look away for a second and compose himself, "Joey, I'm not scared. You know that your dad is going to be fine, he's Superman."

Jo'an shook her head, "Superman can get hurt too."

"Yeah, but you know that Darkseid is a wimp, Sweetie."

"No, he isn't. And you know that."

Before Oliver could say anything else, the door flung open and the group looked hopeful. Instead, Emil emerged through the doorway with a bloody paper towel in his hand and blood dripping out of his nose. Diana hopped up to help him, "What happened?"

"Lois punched me."

Diana looked at him wildly, "Why in the world would she do that?"

Emil look around the room with an uneasy expression, his eyes falling finally on Jo'an. He swallowed deeply and looked down with a sigh.

"Because I told her that I had done all that I could do."

Lois sat by Clark's bed. Her eyes were transfixed on the cut above his eye. She didn't understand. When he got hit before...when he got cut before, he would just heal up. Stick the guy out in the sun, and he'd be right as rain in no time. But this wasn't like any other time.

And deep inside, she felt the same cold feeling that she felt when Doomsday ki-

"Don't think about that, Lois," she berated herself.

She watched as he continued to breath normally. That sound was the only thing keeping her sane right now.

"Come on, Clark. I need you to wake up. I know I act all tough and bad ass, but I need you. Jo'an needs you. Hell, even Oliver and Bruce need you. What is the world supposed to do without it's greatest hero? What am I supposed to do without my husband?"

Lois had to stop to wipe a tear away.

"What am I going to tell your mom? '_Sorry, Mrs K, I let Clark go out with the boys and now he won't get out of this damn bed. He won't heal. He won't talk. He won't even wake up._' I need you to wake up, Smallville. I can't do this without you. I don't even care if you wake up without those stupid powers, I just want you to wake up. I don't want Superman, I want my husband. I want the guy who makes me want to kill him one minute, and kiss him the next."

"Mom?"

Lois looked to see Jo'an standing in the doorway. "Hey."

Jo'an walked over and hopped up onto her mother's lap, Lois groaned to make Jo'an smile. "You better not be calling me fat, Mom."

"Or what?"

"Or I'm going to go all _Lois Lane_ on you," giggled the little girl.

Lois grinned, "That's my girl."

Jo'an looked at her father laying in the bed. "Is Dad ever going to wake up?"

"He better."

"I wish he would already. Uncle Ollie looks worried."

The older Lane-Kent nodded, "Me too."

She put her cheek on her daughter's head. Jo'an looked up at her "Are you scared?"

Lois frowned for a minute. "I am. But you know what happens every time I get scared?"

She shook her head. Lois smiled, "Your Dad saves the day."

Jo'an let an electric grin spread across her face. "Thanks, Mom."

"Why don't you go take care of Uncle Ollie, ok? You think you can do that for me, Monster?" she teased.

The little girl rolled her eyes, "You're such a dork, Mom."

Lois watched as Jo'an blurred out the door and back towards the main room at Watchtower, chuckling about how similar she was to her father.

"That was nice, Lo..."

She spun wildly, "Clark?"

He grimaced, "What happened? Did we get Darkseid?"

Lois let out a laugh, "You've been out cold longer than a frat boy on new year's morning, and the first thing you ask is '_did we get the bad guy?_'"

"Hey, I've got a wife to compete with for the front page story."

She let out a laugh, "And I've got a husband."

Clark smiled softly at her, "Did I go somewhere?"

Lois grinned. "No. You have been right here with me. And you're not going anywhere else, got it?"

"Wasn't planning on it," he laughed.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? I watched Superman Returns while I was up at my Mom's and I was inspired by that scene between Lois and Jason when Clark was in the hospital. Anyways, this is what I came up with. Off to the next chapter! haha.

**Next Up:** _The Talon Apartment._


	144. Talon Apartment

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois, mentions of Lollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #144, the Talon Apartment (for Tuesday)

**Author's Note: **I think that this one explains itself, but I guess I should mention that it's about _Hydro_, haha.

* * *

"What are you grinning about?"

Lois looked up from the couch at her cousin, "I figured out that Oliver wasn't Green Arrow."

Chloe turned away so that she could hide her smirk, she turned around with a composed face. "Really?"

"Yup. And the best part? I got one hell of a story."

"What would that be?"

"Well, I set up this little sting operation, and next thing you know, it became a real _in-need-of-a-hero_ situation. Luckily, Green Arrow wasn't far away and he swooped in to save the day. Threw a guy across an alley just to save little ole me," bragged Lois.

Chloe couldn't help but roll her eyes, "He threw a guy across an alley?"

Lois grinned, "Yup."

"And then what?

"He super-sped away," she explained before looking all matter of mischievous. "But not before I got the chance to lay one on him."

Chloe let out a laugh and started to shake her head, then she remembered to play along with what Lois just said so she shot her head up.

"Wait, you did what?"

Lois nodded with a wicked grin, "I kissed him. And then he kissed me back. And uh..._wow_."

Chloe felt like she was going to pass out she was containing her laughter so hard, "What do you mean..._wow_?"

"Well, I mean, Ollie's a good kisser and all. Don't get me wrong, it's a knee wobbler. But this guy? _Wowza_."

"Wowza?"

"Wowza."

Chloe let out a laugh before mumbling, "Well, he is a good kisser."

"Huh?"

"Nothing."

Lois let out a satisfied moan, "That kiss sure wasn't nothing."

Chloe started to grin a sinister grin, "Hey Lo...can I invite Clark over to hear the story?

Lois shrugged.

The blonde turned and pulled out her phone to dial his number, "You are going to love this one, Clarkie..."

ring...

ring...

"Clark? Hey, you need to come over to the Talon. I think you're going to find this _very_ interesting," laughed Chloe.

**a couple days later...**

Lois walked through the front door to the Kent Farm, dragging her bag of laundry. Martha laughed as Lois leaned up against the counter with a huff.

"Hey, Mrs K. How's the farm?", asked Lois, blowing her bangs out of her face.

"It's fine for now, but I don't know if our washer is going to survive that load, Lois," she laughed.

Martha glanced at the bag with quirked eyebrows. Lois made an offended face, "What's that supposed to mean? It survives Smallville's sweaty under-roos."

"No!" laughed Martha. "There's just so much! You know that you can stop by more often, Lois. We love having you here."

Before Lois could begin to apologize, Clark appeared in the doorway.

"Hey, Lois."

She eyed his cocky grin with narrowed eyes, "Heya, Smallville. What are you so jazzed about?"

Clark walked into the kitchen, and Lois couldn't help but notice how he puffed out his chest and looked all matter of cocky.

"Nothing in particular. Just a beautiful day outside."

Lois frowned and exchanged a glance with Martha, who just shrugged. "Really now?"

Clark nodded, taking a sip of his orange juice.

"Well, since you're in such a good mood, maybe you should take my clothes and throw them in the washer," she teased.

To her surprise, Clark plucked up her bag with ease. A little too ease she noted. '_Must be them farm boy musc- stop thinking about his muscles!_'

"What are you doing?" she asked.

Clark looked at her with a shrug, "I'll throw them in, but I have to warn you, Lois."

She shook her head in a way that told him to continue.

"I probably can't do it as well as the Green Arrow can."

Lois rolled her eyes as Clark walked back towards the laundry room, she took a seat across the way from Martha.

"What was that all about?"

Martha shrugged, "He's been in a really good mood lately. I'm not sure what's been going on."

In the back, Clark was humming to himself as he dumped the laundry of one Lois Lane into the washer.

"_That Green Arrow could teach Ollie a thing or two...that Green Arrow could teach Ollie a thing or two...woo woo woo_," he hummed.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahaha, I can just picture Tom Welling doing that too, haha. I know that a lot of you wanted to see Clark walk around the farm proud of his kiss with Lois, so I thought I'd write something that could cover that and the kiss-talk between cousins. Anyways, off to the next one!

**Next Up:** _Bonus Chapter._


	145. Bonus Chapter

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** It's a secret! hahaha.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #145, a Bonus for being gone all weekend! You guys are the best!

**Author's Note: **Ok, this one is top secret and I don't want to spoil it, but I think that it's just the chapter to win your hearts again! haha.

* * *

He could barely breath. What was going to happen next? Would-

"Hello?"

His throat tightened, but he couldn't stop the grin that formed on his face with just one word. "It's...it's me..."

There was a long pause. He didn't think she was going to let him in. How could she after all he had done to her? After all he had said to her? But he waited. He came here for a reason and he was going to give this every chance he could. He had to. For _Clark_.

He had almost given up hope when he heard the buzz and the door unlatch.

The climb up the stairs was even worse. Every step, another memory. But as he neared the top, other memories set in. Past memories of them together, their embraces tight and loving. Then fresh memories of the son that he had never known, but could see so much of them inside of him.

Even if it wasn't their blood that ran through his veins. It made him continue.

Jonathan reached her doorway. He raised his hand to knock, but instead, the door swung open to reveal Martha Kent.

"What are you doing here, Jonathan?"

He swallowed, his nervousness was etched across his features. "I wanted to see you."

She blinked without changing her expression. She wanted answers. She wanted to know why he had come all this way.

"You look beautiful, Martha. Of course...you've always been beautiful," he mumbled.

Martha wasn't sure if it was that nervous Kent charm or the fact that he had come all the way from Smallville, but she opened the door to let him in.

He smiled in thanks.

Stepping into the small apartment, he glanced around. Law books on the coffee table. Her suit jacket draped over a chair.

"What are you doing here?"

Jonathan turned back around to see her waiting, arms crossed. He ran his hand through his hair. "I met someone today."

Martha didn't bite. Then again, he didn't really expect her to. Why should she care who he met today?

"He told me some things. Showed me a part of myself that I hadn't seen in the mirror in a while. The best part of myself."

She had to admit, she was curious. "What part was that?"

Jonathan smiled that crooked Kent smile at her. It still gave her butterflies. "You."

Martha's eyes grew wide. "What?"

"I used to think...that farm was what kept us together. That without it, I wasn't a good enough man for you, Martha. And I know I don't deserve a second chance after all thats happened, but..." He let a small smile grace his watery eyed features, "I'd rather risk everything...than hold onto nothing."

She wavered slightly.

"A home...it's not the _place_. It's the people _in_ it. I know that now. And you're my home. You've always been my home...and the best part of me. And after all I've seen today? After all I've realized? I'm going to do everything in my power to make it back home. Back to you."

Jonathan looked away shyly as tears began to fall before turning back. "I love you, Martha. I always have...and I always will. So please...can I come home?"

Martha fixed a look on him that Jonathan couldn't quite read. Her furrowed brow told him that she was angry. That she might like to push him out the window and kill him good. But the tears building in her eyes. The emotion within them. They told him that his words might just work.

"Do you have any idea..." she started. Jonathan looked away in fear, she was going to kick him out.

Martha wiped away a tear that had gotten away, "Do you have any idea how long I've waited for you to say that?"

Jonathan's head shot back towards her, "What?"

She didn't waste her time with words, she ran towards him and enveloped him with a hug. Both letting their tears fall freely.

"I'm so sorry, Martha."

"I've missed you so much."

Neither was sure how long they stood there like that. Jonathan was lost in the smell of her perfume while Martha relished in the feeling of his rough hands rubbing her arms softly. Both brought back memories of nights spent in the loft and mornings filled with orange juice and shy smiles.

Martha nuzzled her face softly into his chest, "All I ever wanted to spend my life here with you. Maybe a kid or two."

"Well then..." he told her, leaning back to meet her content smile. "Maybe I should tell you about the rest of my day..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, have I earned your love back yet? hahaha. For those of you that (somehow? haha) missed it, this was my Earth-2 Jonathan chapter and the continuation of the end of _Kent_. I hope that you guys liked it, and I tried to make it similar to the Clois conversation at the end of Kent to show how just how similar the Kents and Lane-Kents have and will become, haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it!

And one last time, haha, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR NOT KILLING ME FOR BEING GONE FOR SO LONG! haha. We'll be back to normal now!

**Next up:** _the Crime Syndicate._


	146. Crime Syndicate

**Review Comments: Holy cow! hahaha, three pages of reviews to reply to! Is this what Santa feels like? haha.**

_**alexindigo**_ - I saw my window, and I went for it! haha. I was saving it for a moment that would be a "You are definitely the one" moment, because I was pretty sure that they weren't going to follow through by the end of Season 10 on the bracelet. Naman has kind of fallen off the map. Though there was that little bit about Doomsday being Sageeth (puh-lease, it is so Lex, haha), but that was about it recently.

Well, there was a deleted scene where he put the chip back on his neck and decided to become an emotionless robot again. I actually am going to have a Metallo chapter coming up, and he's going to become a villain, but they've kind of messed with my continuity now, haha. Not sure if it will still work.

I have no idea if it's Earth-2 Jonathan or Ghost Jonathan either, so I held off on having him somehow transport to Earth-1 in my Bonus Chapter. I think that because Lois _is_ so strong, it says all that much more when she gets vulnerable when it comes to Clark. I think it adds an almost bold underline to the statement that she loves him. That he is her life partner. That he is her everything. And of course, she is all that to him as well.

That scene in Escape is one of my all-time favorite Clark moments, hahaha. He's such a goof when it comes to Lois. And here's the thing: he really plays that part well. When he isn't being so Clark Kent-y, he's actually a pretty good actor. Sometimes I wonder if he just tries too hard to be some kind of stoic figure as Clark because when he's playing kind of off-Clark (if that makes sense? haha), he ends up surprising me.

Haha, you're getting pretty good at that. Do I need to be worried about you stealing my job? hahaha. Well, here is the thing with Ma and Pa Kent: They are my template for older Clois. So shouldn't younger Clois be my template for the younger Kents? haha. That's how I'm selling it! haha.

**_Jaclyn Parker_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it! But honestly, it was as much yours as it was mine, haha. You gave me the idea, and that just fit perfectly with my bracelet idea and SHAZAM! It became that, haha. I think I got my lead foot from watching the Flintstones and Speed Racer as a kid, haha. I might just have to write that chapter where Jo'an does it too! haha. I can see how it would play out perfectly! haha.

For me, Oliver is the Smallville Bruce. Rich boy with questionable methods sometimes, at least in Clark's eyes, that becomes (for whatever reason) the hero to Clark as Clark becomes Oliver/Bruce's hero. Oliver is how I would have written Bruce if I was writing Smallville and could have brought in Bats. I love the little moments between Jo'an and Lois because they (and I'm not trying to brag, haha) aren't like other Lois/Kids stories. It feels so different because Lois isn't treating her like her baby girl all the time, and for whatever reason, it just feels more right that way. I like them this way, haha. Sue me! haha.

I love the Chloe/Lois dynamic. And I'm sad that we've gotten away from that, though at the same time, I see how Lois being the star of the Daily Planet with Clark Kent on her arm would be kind of painful for Chloe to watch. That's where my "Chloe" chapter kind of fits in though, haha. I'm glad that I could keep you on your toes for so long! hahaha. I was trying to be uber-sneaky with that chapter! As for my Mom, I'm pretty sure all my sighing and whining last weekend has clued her in that maybe the internet wouldn't kill her, haha. Especially if I promise to do Skype or something, haha.

_**clarkfan325**_ - I'm glad that you liked them!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Well, I couldn't let Lois distract him too much! hahaha. If Pebbles is anything like her father, she's going to uber-hard-headed, lol. And no, I'm not quite that bad, haha. I'm just like super-incapable of telling my mom _no_ because she just breaks me down like I'm made of glass, haha. She has this super human ability to bring me back to being about four years old and having stolen her horror movies for my sleepovers, haha. Deer-In-Headlights, haha.

I'm pretty sure that in the future, Emil will just avoid her like the plague, haha. She's scary in those situations. Man of Steel or not, she does not like the idea that her man is hurt, haha. I wish we could have seen more of that, haha. I think it would've been funny. Hahaha, you're going to break my ankles? I better start stocking up on stories because you guys are starting to scare me a little bit, hahahaha. Jk...or am I? haha.

**_cathy03_** - Haha, I'm glad that I could help grow your Clois fan heart, haha. Like I was telling alexindigo, I'm using the Kents as my template for older Clois, it only makes sense that young Clois should be my template for young Kents, right? haha.

Meh, there's never going to be another death for Clois in this story, haha. I might do another chapter or two that take place when Clark was "dead" when Doomsday comes back, but he'll always come back! haha. I can promise you that much! I love it too, haha. I call my Dad "the Crypt Keeper", and I call my Mom "Old Bat" sometimes, haha. They have a million horrible nicknames for me, haha, but it's all in good fun. I guess that's where that comes from, haha.

I think you might be right, haha. Offscreen Smallville is a sunday in paradise, haha. He seems like he is there in the flesh. I'm not sure. I don't think he is from Earth-2, but how can I rule that out? haha. Given his scene where he gives Clark the suit, maybe he's a physical manifestation of Jor-El or something? I'm not sure what they're going to do, but I can't wait to find out! Even i'm going to be super depressed that it's gone! haha.

_**Meg**_ - Well, I had an angry mob to calm, haha. I had to bring my A-Game, haha. Awww, I'm glad that I can make your day start off a little better! I know that when I wake up, I've usually got four or five reviews waiting for me and then they come along during the day, and I have to tell you, that makes my day, haha. I know that sound super-nerdy, but I love you guys! You make my boring and/or painful workdays into awesome days! haha.

Ella Lane was going to be in this bunch, she will be up probably in the next three or four chapters, haha. I haven't forgotten either!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Hahaha, you're going to make me blush! It's just little ole me! haha.

Yeah, I wish they would keep up on stuff like this. There should be a little room filled with a fanboy intern (me? please? haha) that makes a list of all the little things that need to be hinted at or addressed here and there. I've spent so many episodes thinking, "Why didn't they use that here? Why didn't they use that character here?" I mean, really? Why not use Steve Lombard or Ron Troupe? There are a million little scenes with Daily Planet workers, you can't even use Jeff the Intern more often? If I ever get to write a show or a movie, I'm going to use these guys to their full extent! hahaha.

I was so giddy when they finally mentioned Steve and then showed Ron in _Booster_!

I'm glad that you liked the Mother's Day fun, haha. And yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm still working that out in my head, haha. I have a few little chapters ready for the new baby, but they are almost all baby related chapters. I'll sprinkle them in here and there, haha. I just worry about this becoming a family Clois story, Jo'an has actually been a surprise hit, and mostly because her personality makes her capable to be in non-kiddy chapters, haha. She was only supposed to show up that one time because of popular demand after I hinted towards her, but she's become a main fixture as much as Ollie or Bruce or even Chloe!

Given the way he reacted right after the kiss and then when he heard about it, that boy liked what momma gave him, hahaha. I'm not sure what Jonathan we are getting back, but like you, I'm just glad to be getting him! haha. Can't wait until Friday!

_**Katlynne**_ - haha, don't you start on me now, Ms. Katlynne! hahaha.

You better believe it, and only Clark Kent can pull it off! hahaha. And yeah, I think you're right! And I think that Lois and Clark need to sit down and have a talk about Lana Lang at some point soon, could that be...could it...was that the spoiler for the week? I think it might have been, hahaha.

Can you imagine their take-out bill? hahaha. I can just see their fridge stocked with random chinese food boxes and pizza boxes, hahaha. Oh man, they would be so broke! How ever would they pay for Superman's drycleaning? haha. Oh yeah, as much as we give the female Kents (er...Lane-Kents, haha), the men are even worse than the women! haha. I should have added that last bit to the chapter! haha. _Lois walked to the door and smirked back...CLICK._ hahaha.

Actually, as alexindigo pointed out, Clark was singing about Lois in Escape, haha. Watch that scene (you'll like it, it's in the shower, hahaha), and then read that last line about him singing again, haha. Oh boy, that made it so much better for me, haha. I'm glad you liked the call-back because I'm make an effort to show the similarities between the two couples, haha. The Kents couldn't be more obviously meant to be, and Clois should be the same! haha.

...I think you guys would kill me, haha. I'm ever watchful for ninjas. But by definition, I'd never see it coming, hahaha.

_**Ina100years**_ - I wish she could find out it was him too, haha. That would be hilarious! haha.

**_Leli1013_** - Noticed that in Season 4, never let go of it, haha. She makes him feel so alive, even if he would've never admitted it, haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - Hahaha, I'm glad that I could assist you! haha. And wow, that's quite the compliment, haha. There are a lot of great writers who do a great Jonathan and Martha, so wow, haha. I'm quite flattered by that! And yeah, I wanted to bring back the bracelet, it was just about when and where, and that was a true "You are the one for me" moment that I thought fit perfectly for it. Hopefully I can help unfry your brain tomorrow! haha. Wait, today? haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** one-sided Earth-2 Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #146, the Crime Syndicate of AmeriKa (For Wednesday, and that's not a typo. That's how you spell it in the Anti-Matter Universe/Earth-2)

**Author's Note: **So, since we kind of left off in _Kent_ with Clark Luthor looking like he might become a hero, I had to come up with a way to turn him back into the villain that we know he has to be! haha. I'm sorry Luthor-lovers, haha, but Ultraman is a baddie for sure! haha.

* * *

"He isn't going to turn...he's a hero now," warned Super-Woman.

Johnny Quick rolled his eyes, "Right, she is. You dunno what he'd do if you let 'em off his lease, Owly."

Owlman wanted to smack them both.

"I don't like to agree with Quick, but he's got a point. He is a dangerous foe, and he shouldn't be taken lightly. We should kill him," suggested Power Ring.

"No," replied Owlman.

"Then what is it you planning to do, then? Risk our 'ole operation for one measly bloke?"

Owlman grinned a sinister grin as he walked towards the chamber hidden in the wall of his Wayne Enterprises office.

"I'm going to bring him down to _our_ level."

Clark Luthor struggled against his chains. The pale green glow of kryptonite shined a few feet away. He knew that it would cost him his life if he couldn't get out of this particular situation. He almost missed the days of being a villain. He never had any enemies to deal with. Nobody but _Queen_ anyways.

'_And even he wasn't much of a threat,_' he considered almost sinisterly. He quickly berated himself, '_You aren't that man anymore, Clark..._'

The door to the chamber slowly slide open as a figure entered, Clark squinted, trying to make out who it was.

"Evening, Mr. Luthor..."

Clark frowned, '_Was that...it couldn't...was that..._'

"Bruce?"

The man stepped into the light, revealing his identity. "Not Bruce..._you_ killed him," smirked the man. "But I am a Wayne."

Clark wanted to snarl, "Tommy."

"No, no, It's Thomas Wayne Jr now. And it's been so very long since I've had the opportunity to talk to such an old friend. How have you been?"

"I've been better," retorted Clark as he shook his chains with a purpose.

Thomas let a grin spread across his face, "I can imagine. This whole..._hero_...thing. It hasn't been kind to you, has it?"

Clark glared, "It's worth it."

"Is it?"

"Is it what?"

"Worth it?" Thomas asked. "Is it worth it knowing that you'll never win? That my friends and I will always know how to defeat you?"

Ultraman clenched his jaw, Owlman liked that.

"I think that you've been looking at this all wrong, Clark. I'm not the villain here."

His chained companion wanted to laugh, "Really now?"

Thomas smirked. "Really. You see, I'm not just in it for the profits. Though, those are nice too. I'm in it for the control. Those people, the ones that you're protecting? They can't control themselves. It's our job to step in a control them for their own good."

"By killing and robbing them blind?"

"In any war, there are always casualties, Clark. Or weren't you listening to dear Lionel when he rambled on and on about the heroes of past?"

Clark gritted his teeth. "It's not the same thing."

Thomas wanted to laugh, "It's not? Yes, I'm ruling this planet with fear. But the people fall into line. It's a safer world now."

"And you want me to join you? To help your campaign of terror?"

"I want you to help me create a better tomorrow for these people, Clark. I want you to help me bring the world back into balance. We'll never have that as long as the humans are running the show, you know that. They're too petty, too easy to corrupt."

Ultraman rolled his eyes, "And you expect me to believe that you aren't corrupt?"

"How can I be?" laughed Owlman. "I'm at the top. I'm untouchable. Who's there to make me do _anything_ I don't want to do?"

Clark couldn't utter a word. Thomas had a point. And Thomas knew that, because he was just about to make the big finale.

"And speaking of things we want to do...wouldn't you like it for Lois to look at you the way she used to?"

His head shot up at Owlman's words. "What?"

Thomas smirked, "The power that you could have...how could she not look up to you? How could she not fawn after you?" He knelt down to Clark's level so that he can look him in the eye, "Wouldn't you rather have her look at your with the wish to taste your lips..."

Clark zoned out, "Instead of the wish for my death..."

It was then that Thomas knew that he had Clark in his grasp.

"Join me, and I promise you...we will make Lois Lane see the new Clark Luthor. We can make her see you as a hero, because that's what you will be. You will be the ultimate sheriff in a new world order, Clark. Don't you want that? Don't you want to be a hero with Lois by your side?"

Clark's breathing grew heavy, "I do..."

Thomas extended his hand, "Then join my Crime Syndicate, Ultraman. Be our general. We need the big guns."

Once Clark took his hand, he kryptonite seemed to turn off. When he pulled his hand back, he noticed the switch in Owlman's glove. Owlman led him back into the office to meet the rest of the group. While Ultraman talked with Johnny Quick and Power Ring, Super-Woman pulled Owlman aside.

"I can't believe you did it. How did you turn him? He was hell bent on being a hero."

Owlman cast one look at Clark and smirked back at her, "I stabbed him in the only place the Man of Steel was vulnerable."

She gave him a confused look that made Thomas chuckle with glee to be her superior yet again.

"His _heart_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to do something that would make it believable that he went back to being Ultraman in time for our Powergirl/Karen Starr chapters (whom I need to bring back, asap! hahaha), and so I decided to spin it with a Clois edge: Clark becomes Ultraman so that he can be powerful enough so that Lois will love him. Almost...dun dun dun...Lex Luthor-ish in a way! haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! And for those of you that are going to say that Super-Woman is Lois Lane in the Anti-Matter Universe/Earth-2, I know, but I wasn't going to make the Smallville Earth-2 Lois a villain, now was I? hahaha. Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _Gotham City_.


	147. Blue K

**Review Comments:** I want to review, but _the Finale_ just started! I'll make up for it with when I post _Gotham City_ later!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #147, Blue Kryptonite

**Author's Note:** I know I said _Gotham City_ would be next, but instead, you'll get _Blue-K_. _Gotham City_ will be posted tonight, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Clark sat impatiently, his knee bouncing against the floor. He didn't know it, but he was actually digging into the stone floor of Watchtower. His eyes kept flittering to his watch as he waited for Emil to return from his office. He wanted to get back to Lois.

"Clark?"

His head shot up, "Yeah?"

"I think we've got a solution."

Clark stood and observed the bracelet within Emil's hand. He looked up at the doctor questioningly, "What is this?"

Emil chuckled, "You don't feel any different?"

Clark shrugged, "Not really."

A mischievous grin spread across Emil's face, "Promise not to hit me?"

Brow furrowed, Clark nodded.

Emil promptly slapped Clark across the face, which caused Clark to topple over in pain. "What was that?"

The doctor broke into a fit of laughter.

"This bracelet has blue kryptonite fragments embedded within it. As you know, blue kryptonite turns you human. Well, as long as it's around."

Clark rubbed his face, "Geeze, does it always hurt this bad when someone gets slapped?"

Emil snickered, "Pretty much."

Clark gave him an evil glare, "How is this going to help Lois with her pregnancy?"

"In theory, if she wears the bracelet, the baby should basically become human. We don't have any information about kryptonians and humans mating, so this is the best chance to have a normal pregnancy. Lois should go through all the motions of a normal pregnant woman," explained Emil.

A smile formed on Clark's face, "That's the best news, Emil. Thank you."

Emil nodded, "It's my pleasure, Clark."

Without another word, Clark flew back to the Kent Farm and found his wife preparing a feast. For herself. All of which, had a nice smooth layer of Jet-Puffed Marshmallow Creme on top. "What? Maybe it's a Kryptonian Pregnancy thing. Ever think of that, Smallville?"

"I doubt the kryptonian version of '_What To Expect When You're Expecting'_ had a chapter about Jet-Puffed Marsmallow Creme," he chuckled

Lois rolled her eyes, "Their loss."

He walked over and set the bracelet next to her plate, not too close out of fear she might eat it, and took the seat across from her. Lois looked up at him with raised eyebrows...her mouth was full, you see. "It's a blue kryptonite bracelet. It's going to make the baby human."

"Uh...'ont your 'owers 'e 'one?"

Clark couldn't help but chuckle, "It's worth it.

Lois fiddled with the bracelet in her hand before looking up at him warily, "Are you sure about this?"

Clark let out a sigh, "There isn't a thing in the world that matters more to me than this baby coming out safely."

"But when you're around me, you won't be able to pull off your _up, up, and away..._"

He laughed, "I'll just have to run away from you so that I can get my powers back. I should be used to it by now."

Lois looked at him threateningly, "Ok, this might be the kryptonian monster that makes me pee a hundred times a day that you've put in my stomach speaking, but what the hell is that supposed to mean? Since when do you have to _run_ away from me?"

Clark leaned down towards her, "Everybody knows, Lois...you can't keep your hands off of me."

Her eyes bugged out and her jaw dropped, "Wha...wha...what are you talking about? I can totally keep my hands to myself!"

"The kryptonian monster that makes you pee a hundred times a day that I've put in your stomach says otherwise," he teased.

Lois glared at him. 'How dare he use my own clever lines against me! This is war!'

"Well then, maybe I should just learn to keep my hands to myself from now on to make your life easier then?"

A flash of fear streaked across Clark's face, but he quickly composed himself. "Fat chance."

"You calling me fat, Kent?"

He smirked at her use of his last name, "I'm calling you perfect, Ms. Lane, and don't think you're going to be able keep me away. Blue-K or not."

Lois grinned, "That was a pretty good answer, Mr. Kent."

"Well, you don't get to be married to Lois Lane and not learn a trick or two," he teased. "Besides, I have to keep my Kiss streak up."

"Yeah, well, you better kiss me already or we're gunna add another tally to the Kill column, you got it, Kent?"

Clark's giddiness was palpable as he leaned in to just that, because lets face it, who could turn down an offer like _that_?

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I figured this is the best way to have Lois have a Kryptonian baby, but I am off to watch the Finale!

**Next Up:** _Gotham City_.


	148. Gotham

**Review Comments:**

_**Abhilegend**_ - Thanks, I'm starting to think it'll be closer to 200 now, hahaha. I'm not too familiar with that storyline or that character, I will look into it. I will say this though, how does that fit in with Superboy-Prime and his love of Laurie Lemmon, who was more Lana Lang than Lois Lane?

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, and when you read _Earth-2_, his Lois Lane-less fate will be sealed forever, as will his role as a villain. Haha, I hear you loud and clear about the Finale, I squealed like a little girl! My review is down before under my last Author's Note.

_**Katlynne**_ - I promise it will go well! haha. Lana Lang will not have her day, not in my story, haha. That reminds me so much of that guy that gets Clark's powers in Lois&Clark where he starts charging people? hahaha. The Resplendent Man, hahaha. And you better believe I'm going to write something like that now, hahaha. I can just see them arguing about who has to shut the door. "Even I'm not fast enough for _that_," mutters Bart.

If this one was painful for you, I'm going to feel really bad when you read _Earth-2_, hahaha. I can't have Ultraman being a good guy, haha. I'm a slave to the comics on this one, he's got to be Superman's mirror image! I want Clark Luthor to be a villain! haha.

I missed Emil too. I thought we'd have more cameos for the Finale, but as you know, i'm not complaining, haha. And you totally just made me picture Lara looking up at Jor-El with marshmallow creme all over his face, hahaha. Uh huh, _YOU_ can't resist it either, hahahaha.

_**svgurl410**_ - The Carter/Oliver thing is one of my favorite dynamics, and that goes all the way back to the comics. I was so happy to see that they kept it for the Smallville appearances of Carter, so of course I had to write about it! haha. Sometimes I wonder who Lex would be if he had stayed good, and that really came out during my _Luthor Mansion_ chapter, I almost wish he hadn't gone bad because he was a great guy.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm sorry! I'm sorry! haha. Ultraman is a bad man! haha. I have to make him a villain! I'm afraid to tell you that Lois Lane of Earth-2 will not be getting involved with Clark Luthor, but she will appear in _Earth-2_ and they do have a pretty emotional scene, but I don't think you're going to like it very much, haha. The Crime Syndicate is the reverse Justice League. The Anti-Matter Universe/Earth-3 aka Smallville's Earth-2 is basically a reverse world where the heroes are all villains and the villains are all heroes. For example, Alexander Luthor and the Jokester (their version of Joker) are heroes while Johnny Quick (their Flash) and Power Ring (their Green Lantern) are villains.

I was super happy to see Ron and Steve. I always watch movies like The Dark Knight and think, "Why a new guy? Why not use Harvey Bullock or Renee Montoya here? Why are they making new characters when you have these great comic book characters?" I did the same thing on Smallville, but in the end, everything works out, doesn't it? hahaha. I just love seeing those little add-ins that say "we care about the comics were adapting", haha.

Yeah, Booster should have gone back. I don't know why he stayed. His presence is going to change things big time. And yep, Lois Lane is an evil woman with super-powers that basically sleeps with Ultraman, Owlman, Jimmy Olsen, and several others I think, haha. Earth-3 is a bad, bad place, haha.

Well, you've got a Gotham City chapter now! And a bonus chapter after that! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked pregnant Clois, and of course, when the idea for Emil to slap Clark came into my head, I was like, "this is going to be funnnnnnnnnnnY," hahaha. I won't comment too much in case people who haven't seen it skim the review replies, but you can totally see my review down below! haha.

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! And yeah, I think you can have family fun without being all mushy all the time. I mean sure, I got giddy when I wrote that bit with Jo'an resting her head on Lois's chest, but she doesn't always have to be that way. And yes, I think there will be some _Prophecy_ bits in the future, there was just too much material to work with not to come back to it! haha.

Yeah, Clark Luthor is going to be a baddie. I'm sorry, haha. He is Ultraman, and that means I have to make him a baddie! haha. I can't say too much about the Finale right here since some people read these replies and haven't seen it yet, but my review is below! haha. I loved it too, btw! haha.

_**Ocean's Eyes**_ - Haha, aww, I feel so flattered! haha. And yep, I'm a guy, so congrats on the five bucks, haha. I started writing on here because I really didn't have anywhere else to write. The feedback is like putting gas in a car, haha. Makes you want to keep writing! I'm glad that you like the Kents and Clois. I try and write all the characters so that they both feel like they ought to feel given their appearances on Smallville and in the comics, but at the same time, it is important to right them as flesh and blood people that you could honestly see existing.

I'm not gay, haha. Very much straight, haha. I've probably gotten a little bit of insight because I grew up in a house filled with women, haha. I intend to keep writing for a very long time, I hope you keep reading and _hopefully_ reviewing! haha. And I'm glad to hear I'm favorited! haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I don't know, haha, but he isn't going to be a goodie, so no wories! hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - You will see how it all turns out during Earth-2, haha. I don't want to say much more out of fear of spoiling it! haha.

I think the red-heart thing is what made him back into a machine, and Lois took that off of him? I can't remember, it's been so long, haha. I totally hear you about Brian Austin Green though, I loved him when he was on the Sarah Connor Chronicles and was very impressed with the way that he brought a real human side to a normally robotic type of character. Very similar to how James Marsters played Brainiac.

Haha, I'm not delusional or anything, I know that Tom isn't the best actor on the show, but I think he has more than he shows. And it sounds like we both agreed about his performance during the Finale! hahaha. Well then, I guess I'll have to keep writing then! haha.

Yep, it's baby Jo'an in there, haha. I haven't figured out how I'm going to do Baby #2 quite yet, but I will write something soon! Yeah, Clark has to be like a ninja at this point in time, haha. He's been dealing with Lois and her craziness for ages by this point, haha. He's trained! I won't say much about the Finale to avoid spoiling anything, but my review is down below, not let's see what i can reply to, haha.

Hahaha, awww, you love Tom Welling now! haha. I will say this, I wasn't sure about him as Superman...until last night, haha. How Henry Cavill is playing Superman and Tom Welling never even got a phone call? I have no idea. Bad move, Snyder. I wish we saw it more too, but then again, we saw it so much more than I thought we would. I thought we'd get that last rooftop scene at the most. Maybe less. And then we got all the rest? Wow.

Maybe we should pretend that my Clois wedding was the wedding we see seven years later? haha. That might fill a lot of gaps, but I don't know if a lot of those chapters will still fit with the way things are now. But hey, we were already here, haha. That's not our fault! Haha, well, happy birthday month! I have two chapters for you right now so that you can begin to get over it! Plus, buy the Finale on iTunes! haha. Maybe that will be enough to show the wizkids at Warner Brothers that we want a Smallville movie! Or at least another Superman show with the Smallville cast! hahaha.

_**Jaclyn Parker**_ - Haha, when I was a kid, we made Fudge for Christmas every year, and that stuff was in the recipe. My sister would always steal it and eat it when everyone else was sleeping, haha. You are right about the bracelet thing though, haha. But you have to wonder what is worse? Lois having to stay out of trouble for nine months? Or the baby kicking through her stomach when she's getting a tan? hahahaha. *Mallrats Referenced!*, hahaha.

I hear you! Tom Welling was awesome last night, and really solidified my belief that he can be a great Superman if he is given the chance. Possibly the best since Christopher Reeve, and hey, who knows, he looked awful perfect last night...hahahaha. Time to give Henry Cavill his pink slip! hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with inspiration coming from IlleanaElise22

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bruce/Diana, one-sided Bruce/Clark? hahaha

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

** Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #148, Gotham City

**Author's Note:** The long awaited sequel to _Pink-K_, haha. I hope you guys like it!

* * *

Kara burst through the front door, her breathing ragged.

"Ms. Kent? Are you ok?"

She looked up wildly, "I need Bruce. I need Bruce to help me with something."

Alfred's eyes grew wide, "Ummm, well, I believe he is down in his," he cleared his throat,"..._office_. I assume you know the way?"

Kara nodded, "If you mean his _cave_, then yes."

The old caretaker smiled as Kara blurred back out the door and to the cave below. "Master Bruce has the most interesting friends."

Kara flew down into the cave and interrupted Bruce in the middle of a sparring session with Diana. At least that's what he was calling it.

"It was!"

The Kryptonian didn't look convinced by the way that Diana was blushing. "I need you two to do me a favor."

"What kind of a favor?" asked Diana.

"Clark uh...well...can you just go to the Fortress and if he seems...uh...unusual? Can you try and jump him with this?"

Kara extended a lead box towards them. Diana and Bruce exchanged looks, "What is it?"

"Krptonite."

"And we're dosing Clark with kryptonite...why?"

She looked away shyly, "You'll see."

"Why can't you?"

"I have to find Lois before she kills someone."

Before they could ask anymore questions, Kara flew out the ceiling to find her cousin-in-law. Bruce and Diana exchanged smirks.

"My jet or yours?"

When they arrived at the Fortress of Solitude, they heard...music? They carefully walked down the snowy trail, not sure of what they were going to find. Zod perhaps? Maybe Darkseid had returned? Neither of them were sure what to expect...but what they found? Was much more terrifying.

"Clark?"

The man in question spun around, "Bruce! Diana! Come dance with me!"

Bruce frowned, "Is that...is that Justin Beiber? Clark...did you turn the Fortress of Solitude into an iPod?"

"Well, it is supposed to be universally compatible..." offered Diana.

"Dark Knight..." laughs Clark. "More like my knight in shining armor! Come dance with me!"

Bruce looked over at Diana with a look of fear, she bit back a laugh.

"Go on, it's not like I haven't had this fantasy before," she teased. Suddenly, her eyes got really big. "Don't tell Lois that I said that."

"What? How you want to kiss her husband and now are scared she's going to kill you?" he asked with a jealous frown.

Diana rolled her eyes, "You are such a baby sometimes! It was a joke!"

"Uh huh, well jokes can hurt too, Prin-"

Bruce's statement was cut off by the feeling of a hand stroking his cheek. He turned to see Clark staring at him. "Stubble..." he whispered.

"Diana? Kryptonite..._Now_..."

Back at the Kent Farm, the door swung open and Clark Kent stood in the doorway. All the eyes were on him. "Overloaded on some Green-K. I'm better now. And we are never talking about this again." He stomped into the kitchen, doing his best to avoid meeting eyes with anyone else in the room.

Lois snorted, "Yeah, that's definitely _not_ going to happen."

Bruce Wayne and Diana Prince walked in the door next with smiles playing across their faces.

"You guys are never going to believe what just happened," snickered Diana.

Her companion shuddered, "I'm with Clark...let's never talk about this again."

Oliver's head shot up, "Wait, what? He hit on you too?"

Diana snorted, "_Too_?"

"Clark was hitting on me at the Daily Planet earlier."

"Well, he was all over Bruce at the Fortress."

Oliver paused for a few moments, "...how all over?"

Diana tilted her head, "Are you actually going to be jealous that he wanted Bruce more than you?"

"Are you actually saying that he wanted Bruce more than me?"

Bruce's head shot up, "What the hell is that supposed to mean? Why wouldn't Clark want me?"

Diana and Chloe shared a look that told them they were thinking the same thing: _What is wrong with our respective partners?_

"Umm, between the two of us? there's no question that Clark would be picking me!"

Bart grimaced, "Uh...Ollie? Clark is a brunette guy. Lana, Lois, they're both brunettes."

Chloe chimed in for her husband's sake, which was super twisted given the conversation, "Alicia was blonde?"

Oliver gave her a loving look.

"And Chloe is blonde, didn't you two go out in freshman year?" asked Dinah.

The spunky blonde shot a look at Dinah and Dinah's blonde hair, she couldn't help but give Dinah a _don't-even-think-about-touching-my-man_ look.

AC stood up, "Hey, let's face it. If Clark was going to hit on any of the guys...it'd be me!"

There was a collective snort.

AC glared around the room, "You know what? I don't like you guys very much. So uncool."

"Honey...just sit down," suggested Mera.

Oliver grew impatient, "You know what? It doesn't even matter. I've got years of history with Clark!"

Bruce smirked, "It's the miles not the years, Oliver."

"Oh no you didn't!"

"Cry me a river, Robin Hood."

Chloe rolled her eyes and grabbed Oliver by the arm. As she pulled him towards the kitchen, Oliver just had to turn to yell back, "What was that Nancy Drew? I couldn't hear you over the ca-clang, ca-clang of your utility belt! Yeah! You heard me! Utility belt!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahaha, well, what did you guys think? At least now we know where Jo'an gets her Beiber love from, hahaha. I wanted to do something where Oliver found out about Bruce and Clark, and that just exploded into this, haha. I know that Gotham City was featured for all of what? Two lines? hahaha, but I needed something to go with for this chapter, and so I squeeze that first part in so it would count.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review! Finale Review is down below, so Spoiler Alert!

**Next Up:** _Stryker's Island Penitentiary_

**Finale Review:** I can't believe it's all over...but at the same time, I LOVED IT! I think that the two hour finale was better than any single Superman movie to date, and I honestly can say that it was the perfect way to end the show that I love dearly. From the second Darkseid showed up in Lionel's body at the Farm until the end was the absolutely perfect. The future sequence was beyond words. Everything from the surprise appearance of Aaron Ashmore as the new Jimmy Olsen to Perry White's voice to the John Williams' music to the shirt rip that ended it perfectly, it was incredibly well done.

The wedding vows part was absolutely perfect. And it was amazing to see the way they hit the nail on the head with what these two mean to each other and I couldn't have been happier. Sure, we would have all liked to see, "You may kiss the bride" and SMOOCH, but really, how can you complain about how beautiful everything was up until Oliver pulled out the Gold-K ring. The whole walk down the aisle, I was blown away.

Things I'd change? Darkseid in the flesh, though I get it. Have Lex remember everything, I strongly prefer the Brothers-At-War angle as you'll see in the next chapter, but I still loved all of his scenes. Ummm, more of Tom in the suit? haha. Though I didn't think we'd get as much as we did, so I'm pretty much grasping at straws here, hahaha. Beyond that, I was absolutely in love with the whole Finale, and I'm going to miss that trio (Tom, Erica, Rosie) so much and I really hope that the numbers were huge and that the studios realize how special this really was. I want a Smallville movie, haha.

I'm going to go ahead and call it now: _the Smallville Finale_ will be head and shoulders better than _Man of Steel_.


	149. Stryker's Island

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #149, Stryker's Island Penitentiary (This is a bonus chapter for being so patient with me the last week! Thanks guys!)

**Author's Note:** I loved the Finale, but one of the moments that I would have changed was Lex forgetting. Here is my attempt to add to that, and do a couple other little things (sinister laugh!) that should make me happier as well as fixing a few moments that are now AU in my story! Enjoy! BTW, think of _Mongul_ and _Kent Nelson_ happening between the two sections! It will make it make more sense!

* * *

Her eyes blinked open. The light hurt them, so she shut them again.

"Hey! Hey! Are you ok? How do you feel?"

She tried to focus, looking for the voice that came from her right, "Who...who are..."

A hand intertwined with her own. It felt...leathery.

"How do you feel?"

She moaned as she felt the wound in her stomach, she looked towards the voice, her vision clearing but still unable to make out the person beside her.

"I feel like I've been stabbed in the stomach..."

The man chuckled, "At least you're keeping a sense of humor about it?"

When her vision cleared, she saw kind eyes...but the man was...

"Lex?"

He frowned, "Lex? Who is Lex?"

Tess pushed away from him, ignoring the agony in her stomach. "What are you doing? Where am I?"

The man frowned again, "I found you. You were unconscious and bleeding out. I brought you to the hospital. They said you're going to be fine."

"But...you don't..." realization set in for her. He didn't remember who he was. He saved her because...because he wasn't Lex Luthor. He was just a man that found a woman dying. He did what any decent person would do. He saved her. "You don't remember...do you?"

Lex frowned, "I don't remember...anything..."

_**some time later . . . .**_

Clark's ears rang with the echo of each step. '_Why do prisons always have such loud floors?_' he mused.

His escort directed him past the various levels of security, a long walk into the deepest section of the prison. The section reserved for the most ruthless, the most cunning, and the most dangerous prisoners. The section that Clark's latest interview would take place at.

"How much further?"

The guard turned, "Not much. Just through that door there."

Lois hadn't been too keen on Clark coming down to Stryker's Island for the interview. Normally she would have killed for this kind of interview, but given recent events and the interviewee in general, she gave him a kiss and told him, "Just don't let him get to you."

Clark looked up see the _Maximum Security_ sign bolted to the door in question. On some level, Clark was certain that the man inside would be proud to have earned such a title. The guard put a key into the lock and told Clark, "He is the last cell on the left."

With a nod, Clark walked through the door and began his journey down the hall.

On each side there were glass panels that revealed cells. Within them were some of the most dangerous villains that Metropolis had to offer. Clark walked past each one, remembering how he put them here in the first place. John Corben...Rudy Jones...Winslow Schlott...Bruno Mannheim...and then finally...

"Mr. Luthor?"

Lex sat at his desk, reading one of the dozens of books that he had stashed away in his cell. His head rose just slightly, and Clark was certain that he could hear the muscles moving as the Lex Luthor smirk formed. "Still astonished...still dreading...yet still hopeful. How have you been, Clark?"

Muscles clenched in his jaw, "I'm fine. You asked for a reporter, specifically me?"

Lex rose from his seat and met Clark at the glass panel, "I did."

"What do you want, Lex?"

"I wanted to see you, of course. You didn't think I was going to rot alone in here forever, did you?"

Clark gave him a threatening look, "One can only hope."

That made Lex grin, "Atta boy. I bet you are dying to hear how we've made it back to here, aren't you? Aren't you just a little curious?"

It took a moment or two, but Clark finally answered.

"Tess told me about the neuron toxin."

Lex smirked, "Dear Sis, wow, she was a smart one."

"_Is_."

"Not my finest moment, but hey, what can I say? I didn't remember who I was."

"How is it that you remember now, Lex?"

Lex turned away, basking in his upper-hand over the Man of Steel. "My father was able to put a lifetime of memories into a frankenstein monster, Clark. Do you really think that once I found out who I was, that I wouldn't look for those files? That I wouldn't be able to get those memories back?"

Clark closed his eyes and slightly shook his head, "This was your second chance, Lex."

"A second chance for what? To be your sidekick? That's the funny thing about destiny, Clark. We can play the reset game all we want, but you're always going to be you...I'm always going to be me. Our destiny together is unavoidable. I know that now more than ever."

"You don't have to do this..." he pleaded.

"Do this? I am this, Clark. I _am_ the villain of this story. And you and I? We _will_ amazing men. We _will_ change the world. I will get out of this place and we _will_ meet again," he explained. It was the same look that he had given Clark when they were at the Luthor Mansion.

Clark clenched his jaw, "I will always be here to stop you, Lex."

Lex walked up closely to the glass, getting his face as close as he could. "I'm counting on it..._Superman_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you guys think? I like the idea of Lex knowing, and their whole talk reminded me of the Joker and Batman, so that was the last straw for me. I am in love with this whole...brothers at war thing. Lex is Clark's ultimate challenge, just like Clark is Lex's. I can just see the years and years and years of their back and forth playing out, Clark secretly wanting to _save_ Lex with Lex wanting to beat him but at the same time, can't imagine a world without him because how boring would that be for Lex? A world without Superman? It's his dream and his nightmare.

I wanted to have their conversation be very close to their conversation at the Luthor Mansion to kind of show that he is that person again, because I was in love with _that_ Lex, haha. Plus, I wanted to save Tess. haha. Let me know what you guys thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, it might be _Clois Office_, _Gold Kryptonite_, or _Hiro Okamura_. Maybe something else entirely, haha. I'm no help, am I? haha.


	150. Winslow Schlott

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, there is a new show that I love called _Happy Endings_, and there is this gay guy named Max who is friends with a married couple, a broken-up couple, and a single woman. And Brad, the guy in the married couple, is always talking about face scrubs and stuff, haha, and Max has no idea what he is talking about so the married guy is like, "Are you sure you're gay?" and then Max goes, "Are you you're _not_ gay?" I can totally see that kind of scene going down after all this craziness with Bruce and Ollie wanting Pink-K Clark to want them, haha. They are so vain! hahaha.

Yeah, I was sad to see Tess go. She was starting to become a really integral part of the team, but I guess I understand. Someone had to die, the stakes were too high for at least one person not to get offed. Though I guess Lionel did too. Having Jimmy back was the best besids the tights and flights, haha.

**_Katlynne_** - Why can't I get the picture of Lois chasing Bart with an axe out of my head now? hahaha. I saw that! haha. Beiber thinks Smallville is Beiberlicious, hahaha. I'm going to write another chapter where Lois and Clark talk about...the incident...hahaha.

I had to bring her back! I missed her! haha. And I don't want to _not_ write about her in the future! Plus I already had her in a few chapters with Hal and then with Conner, I just couldn't let her die like that! haha. All-Star Superman was my inspiration for that scene, though obviously unlike All-Star Superman's Lex Luthor, this Lex knows that Clark is actually Superman. I always loved that bit.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that you agree! I want to give Smallville credit for it, but at the same time like you said, they didn't make anything else fit with what it should have been. In the real Ultraman world, Oliver Queen would have been a bad guy too. But I guess that I understand why they did it the way that they did it, they wanted to have a "what if the Luthor's found Clark?" situation and Ultraman was a pretty fitting title.

I'll have to check that out! I must have forgotten about that thing with Naman having babies, but either way, it gave me a chance to have Emil slap Clark in a chapter and that's always fun, hahaha. I know, I know, haha. I didn't have _much_ Pink-K Clark though! haha.

Yeah, that's one of the amazing things about Lex Luthor. No powers, just brains. That's such an imposing character to me. And having their history and their rivalry right there? That just makes it so much sweeter because there is so much going on beneath the surface. Clark can physically take on pretty much any foe that comes along, but at the end of the day, Lex messes with his mind. That's where the battle is really won.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it enough to scare your family! haha. And yeah, I don't know how you keep Cavill on after Tom Welling kicked some super-ass during the Finale. He should be Superman, and I was in the "eh" camp before the Finale. I just tried to avoid sounding like I was bashing him, haha. All along, I've been like, "He is included because I want Erica Durance and Michael Rosenbaum too". Now I want Welling for sure.

Yeah, I loved almost everything in the Finale besides two major things: One was the mindwipe, the other was not much of a physical battle with Darkseid let alone a physical presence. I totally understand why they did the second one because of budget and timing reasons, but why wipe Lex's memory? That was one of the best ideas about Smallville, having Lex and Clark have this awesomely heart wrenching past.

**_Abhilegend_** - Well, I know about the Sandman, but I honestly can't think of anything off the top of my head that had him involved with Superman. Well, even Ultraman was married to Lois Lane. I'm not questioning their bond, and nine times out of ten, Lois and Clark are together. I was just saying that it's not a _constant_ thing, I don't think the universe spins around them. I'll look into it though!

_**RPadavan2**_ - Well, if he really has no memory, he probably doesn't have a bad bone in his body, haha. He would probably turn around and see her lying there and want to help her. If we are saying that it's the Luthor upbringing that makes a person bad and Lex doesn't remember it, then he should be like a clean slate to be as good or as bad as he wants. I decided he'd be a good guy because I want Tess to survive! haha.

Yeah, the commercials were killing me. The CGI wasn't great, but for a TV show, it could have been a lot worse. I hear that Tom Welling had problems with being filmed in the full suit, so maybe that had a lot to do with it. I wanted a full suit shot, but I'm happy with what I got.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Clana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #150, Winslow Schlott

**Author's Note:** I imagine this taking place the morning after the Finale, I hope that you guys like it!

* * *

Lois turned over, her thumb grazing his chest lightly. Clark laughed, "That tickles."

"I like the new suit."

Clark turned over, "You do, huh?"

She grinned, "It's a lot more form fitting than the jeans and jacket."

"Is that all you think about, Ms. Lane?"

"It's up there. I like it when the cape it flapping because it gives me a good look at your a-"

"Lois!"

She laughed, "You're so old fashion sometimes, you know that?"

Clark nuzzled into her neck, "We didn't wait until our wedding night, so I can't be _that_ old fashioned."

"Thank god for that," she laughed.

He wrapped an arm around her and pulled him to his chest, Lois sighed contently. "Does it bother you that we're not married?"

"Not married yet," Clark corrected.

"Right. Does it bother you?"

Clark let out a sigh, "I wanted us to have our special day, but Lois...everyday is special when I'm with you."

Lois let her jaw flap around a bit, "How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"That! How do you be so ridiculously wonderful?"

Clark blushed a little, "I don't know. You're not so bad yourself."

For whatever reason, that sparked a thought in the back of her mind. A conversation that had sparked more than a few of her thoughts as she tried to cancel the wedding. A conversation that she needed to have with him. "Clark..."

"Yeah?"

She hesitated, unsure if she wanted to talk about what they were about to talk about. "Why did Lana leave?"

Clark paled, "What?"

"When..." she swallowed deeply, "When...when I talked to Toyman...he said that Lana sacrificed something for you. And I got to thinking that...we've never actually talked about why she left. Why you guys broke up, you know, for the 100th time?" she laughed. Her nervousness was easily detectable.

He took a long breath, and Lois immediately regretted bring up the topic.

"Lex found out, about me...before he disappeared. My father had left a means to...control me. Lex found it and took it to the Fortress. I tried to stop him, but he was so sure that I was here to hurt people. That I was going to destroy the world. What he didn't realize was that when he put that key on the console, that the whole Fortress was going to cave in on us. That's why I went missing when Chloe was missing," he explained.

"And then I ran into your at Black Creek," she remembered.

Clark nodded. "I don't really know how I survived, and I don't know how Lex did either, but we did. Lex was barely hanging onto his life, and he was making it his mission to destroy me. He created a kind of power suit that would have healed him and made him strong and fast like me. Before he could use it, Lana stole it and used it on herself. She had powers."

"Like I did?"

"Yeah. But unlike my powers...she had powers that let her absorb kryptonite. I don't know if Lex was planning on using it to try and hurt me or maybe use it to protect himself, but from what I could tell...any amount that he came into contact with was absorbed into the suit."

Lois looked away for a moment, "Lana absorbed kryptonite, didn't she?"

Clark grimaced, "Toyman made a bomb that would either kill me or separate us forever."

"What's why she left," whispered Lois. "Thats why you broke up."

He hung his head. "That's why she left, but it's not why we broke up, Lois."

Lois didn't look very convinced. "Then why did you?"

"Look, I'm not going to pretend like she wasn't special to me. And I'm won't pretend like there wasn't a part me of that wanted to be with her. I did. And she was special to me. She'll always be special to me," he explained. Lois hung her head a bit, so Clark raised it back up. "But it wasn't right that time. She was comfortable, and familiar. And that was attractive me then, because I had met someone that made me nervous, that I couldn't predict.

A small smile formed on her face, she knew that Clark meant her.

"I wasn't farmboy Clark anymore. I was Daily Planet Clark. I didn't walk around in flannel, I wore dress shirts that itched," he laughed. "I loved Lana, but I was a different person when I was in love with her than I am now. And when Lana came back, I was so confused with everything that I thought might have been going on between us, that it felt good to have something that was familiar. Like putting on my old Smallville High jacket."

Clark took her hand, "But you know what? I look like a dork in that jacket."

Lois couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"What am I? Sixteen?" he laughed. "Sure, it feels good to put it on every once in a while. Remember those days. But they are in the past. They're just memories. That's not who I am anymore. And it's not what I need. You're what I need. And I don't want to be that Clark anymore, because with you...I am the best possible version of myself. I'm the Clark Kent that I've always wanted to be, but never had enough faith in myself to be."

She eyed him shyly, "Yeah?"

"Lois, your faith in me makes me feel like I can put on those tights," she laughed at that, "and fly up into that sky."

She gave him a very fiery look, "You know what you're making me feel like right now?"

Clark laughed and shook his head.

With a firm grip on the covers, she told him, "Let me show you." The covers flew over them, and they didn't come out for a long, _long_ time.

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that for the Lana Lang conversation? haha. I didn't want to pretend like Lana wasn't a big part of his life, because she was. We can't really deny that, folks. But I wanted to stress that the Lana Lang loving Clark Kent, is not the one that we've seen in recent years. And that not only do we feel that the Lois Lane loving Clark Kent is the best version of him, but that he feels that way too.

Add a little fluffy bedroom stuff, and SHAZAM! Hopefully you guys liked it! haha. Shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** Well, since none of the three I predicted were it, let's shoot for one of them again! haha. _Clois Office_, _Gold Kryptonite_, or _Hiro Okamura._


	151. Vicki

**Review Comments:**

_**sasslady**_ - In some way, Lana has had a positive influence on Clark's life because all the drama he went through with her taught him how to be a better partner for Lois. At least that's the way I'm selling it, haha. Winslow Schlott was Toyman, who told Lois about Lana.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - And yet, don't Bruce and Oliver seem vain and cocky enough to do just that? hahaha. I don't know if I had thought about it when I wrote the first Pink-K chapter or not, but there is an episode of _How I Met Your Mother_ where Ted messes with Barney and Marshall so that they think he is having gay dreams about one of his best friends, and they are arguing over which one of them Ted would be dreaming about, haha.

I can't remember if it was in this story or my other one shot, but my perspective for Lex is that he wouldn't go to the media with Clark's identity or anything like that because that would be too easy. Lex wants the challenge of Superman, and that would ruin it. Another side of it that I want to cover in a future chapter is that deep down, Lex still cares about Clark. And deep down, Clark still cares about Lex. One of the things I loved about the way that Lex was talking in the Finale was that he wants Superman to be there, he wants Superman to be the world's hero. Because Lex wants to be Clark's villain. I will be honest, I was leaning towards him forgetting until I saw his scene with Clark at the mansion. That's the Lex I want to see in the future because he just had such an interesting flair to him. He wanted Clark to be Superman, but he wanted to be Clark's nemesis. That's so crazy, haha. I like it!

I do agree though, way too many villains know Clark's real identity. But that's kind of the way it goes when you're doing a TV show like this. We did have a big chapter where Lex and Clark had their showdown, but I think there will be more. I know that there is an idea that I want to cover down the road, it'll probably have to do with Clark's "death" at the hands of Doomsday. And Lex will have a big role in it.

That's exactly what I wanted to hear! hahaha. I wanted the conversation to feel like it could have happened on the show, and yet, give everyone the kind of closure that they wanted to have with the Clana relationship. I think that Lois needs to hear that from Clark.

Oh, there will be no tomatoes, haha. While I like Amy Adams just fine, I really only want to see Erica Durance in that role because she did it so perfectly that no matter how good Amy Adams does, she will never be as good as Erica Durance in my eyes, haha. She was simply perfect and made Lois Lane the perfect adaption of the comic book Lois Lane with so much strength, compassion, and heart she needs as Superman's partner.

I'll stand in line, haha. I'm sure we can get more than a couple people to join in with us too, haha.

_**Leli1013**_ - I'm glad that I could add something to fix the problem! haha. I just love _that_ version of Lex so much. I'm glad you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I was actually working on that chapter earlier today! haha. It's a combination of a lot of those little moments, so I'm thinking that you're going to like it. Especially the way that it ends, haha. It should end up being a lot of fun!

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm not going to lie, I was rather taken with Tess just because of how beautiful Cassidy Freeman is, haha. Then she got even more awesome because she was this "is she a baddie? is she a goodie?" type character that I missed Lex being in the earlier seasons, and then yes, she wasn't scared to stand up to Lois and that was hot as all hell, haha. Tess and Cassidy were just all around awesome sauce!

I'm glad that you liked it! It's not easy to bring up Lana without things going bad, but I think I managed to add just enough pillow-talk-Clark to ease any lynching that might have taken place otherwise, haha. I know how you girls love your Clark Kent, haha.

**_jade2nightwing_** - Yeah, I had to save her. She's just too much fun not to have saved, haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - He is certainly never going to win any Oscars, haha. I love his chemistry with Erica Durance. I know a lot of people don't put much value in things like chemistry, but when you watched him with other actors or actresses, it really showed.

I was not a big fan of the Gene Hackman Lex Luthor. I liked Kevin Spacey's a bit better, but it still really lacked for me. Lex Luthor's history with Superman made him awesome, and I understand that Hackman's obviously couldn't have that edge, but Spacey's did and that helped a little bit. But what lacked with those two was that they were almost petty crooks at times. What I love about the Smallville Lex Luthor is that not only will he have history with Superman but he also had history with Clark. That adds a whole new flavor and a whole new dynamic to the rivalry that I find extremely intriguing.

Yeah, this seems to happen on a lot of shows. Especially long lasting shows. Little details get lost in the workings, and this was one of those details that I felt should have been brought up. It could have been a big sweet moment on the show, instead, some goofball fanfiction writer gets all the glory, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, implied Vicki/Bruce

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #151, Vicki Vale

**Author's Note: **I love how for the second chapter in a row, I didn't use any of the predicted ones, haha. Hope you guys like it!

* * *

"Is she really loud?"

Lois turned and frowned, "What? Why would you think she's loud?"

"Bruce said she can be really loud. Especially when she is excited."

She laughed, "She's not _that_ loud. And don't forget, we're supposed to pretend like we don't know Bruce."

Clark nodded, "Right."

"Lois? Oh my god! Lois!" squealed a voice from the other side of the cafe.

The couple flinched and looked up to see Vicki Vale standing in the doorway with her arms flailing. Clark laughed, "Not loud at all."

Lois shot him a glare as Vicki ran over to them, enveloping Lois in a bear hug.

"Vicki, this is my husband...Clark."

She gave Lois a funny look, "...Clark?"

Clark stood there awkwardly, "That's my name."

Vicki looked him over, "Like as in...Clark Kent?"

"Uh...yeah."

Lois looked just as confused as Clark did. Vicki continued to look him over, "From Tiny Town?"

"Actually, it's called Smallville."

Vicki looked at Lois with a glare and then back to Clark with a smile.

"Clarkie? Do you mind if I steal Lois away for a few moments?" Clark looked at her oddly and nodded, Vicki grinned. "Just girl talk is all."

In a swift grab-and-pull, Vicki was dragging Lois away from Clark to a table on the other side of the cafe. Then, Vicki punched Lois on the arm.

"What the hell?"

"What the hell? _Who_ the hell was that?"

Lois frowned, "It's Clark, what are you talking about? I just introduced you to him."

Vicki glared at her, "That's not the Clark you were talking about when we were working at the Inquisitor, is it?"

"Of course it's the Clark-" Vicki punched her again. "Ow! What the hell?"

"When did you two start dating?"

Lois rubbed her arm, "A couple years ago, why?"

Vicki glared at her even harder, if that was possible. "Are you saying that you could have been sleeping with _that..._all that time?"

Lois was thoroughly confused now. "What are you talking about?"

"Have you seen that man? He's like a greek sex god! Lois! I thought that I was knocking boots with Mr. Fantastic, but holy crap, have you seen...you could have been sleeping with him for years! He makes Bruce look...Oh my, look at the way that his chest-"

It was Lois's turn to punch her friend. "That's my husband you're talking about!"

"Well! I can't believe you were hiding him all that time! What the hell were you thinking, Lane?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "We weren't into each other back then."

Vicki gave her a confused look, "You weren't into tall, dark, and _oh-my-god-my-knees-are-wobbling-because-he-is-so-sexy_ back then?"

"...ok, maybe I was into him a little bit back then, but he was with someone else!"

"Are you...have I made a mistake...you are Lois Lane, right?" Lois chuckled, giving Vicki the signal to continue. "You should have knocked whatever bimbo was standing in your way the hell out and stolen that hunk of hunkiness, Lois! I can't believe I never made you set us up!"

"I think you've made your point-"

"Is he good? You know? In the _bow chicka bow wow_ department?"

Lois blushed, which caused Vicki to gasp. "Oh my, he's not just sex on legs but he makes your legs not work after sex too? ...does he have a brother?"

Before Lois could respond, Vicki's phone went off and she quickly answered it.

"Uh huh...yeah...ok...what do you mean there was a girl Batman? What? No, there's just the red and green one. His sidekick, yeah, it's a boy. Alright, I'm on the first flight back to Gotham. Alright! I said alright!" she turned back to Lois and grimaced.

Lois laughed, "Big story?"

Vicki nodded, "The biggest. I'm so sorry, I've got to fly back to Gotham and cover it."

"It's ok, I'm sure our paths will cross again, Vic."

They shared a hug and Vicki waved at Clark as she jogged out of the cafe, "Catch you later, Stud Muffin!"

Lois met Clark back at the table, who was leaning back with his hands behind his head.

"I'm a stud muffin, huh?"

With a punch on the shoulder, Lois pulled him to his feet and they made their way out of the cafe. They were just a few feet aaway from the front door when Clark began to chuckle to himself, catching her attention. "What?"

He smirked, "So I make your legs not work, huh?

Lois turned bright red, though it wasn't because she was mad, "You aren't supposed to use your super-hearing for _that_!"

"I didn't have to! Bruce was right! She's very loud," he laughed.

"I can't believe you heard all of that," groaned Lois.

Clark laughed, "A woman had to take her daughter out because she heard all of _that_."

Lois buried her face into her hands and mumbled how she wanted to die right then.

"You know, I don't have a brother, but I could give her Conner's number? I can hook a girl up like that," he teased.

She looked up with an amused smile, "Ok, first of all, did you really just say that you were going to _hook a girl up_? And besides, I don't think that Bruce would appreciate you giving his girlfriend your younger clone's phone number."

He laughed, "It's so weird having to pretend like we don't know Bruce when we probably know him even better than she does."

"Yeah, well, can we just go home?"

Clark mumbled something that Lois just barely caught. "My legs are going to work just fine, Smallville!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I know we talked about having Vicki come back to find out about Lois and Clark, so I thought I'd do a bit that could have Vicki gush all over Clark and his good looks for all of our Tom Welling lovers to enjoy! haha.

Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I sound like a broken record. Likely _Clois Office_, _Gold Kryptonite_, or _Hiro Okamura._


	152. Gold K

**Review Comments:**

_**alexindigo**_ - No complaints on my end! haha. I might have to write a chapter like that just so we can see that! haha. I'm planning on doing a chapter with Lois and Clark and yes, Lois will be milking this quite a bit, haha. I too loved Brian Austin Green on the show and he will be returning in a chapter called _Metallo_ that will take place post-Season 10. He might not be as sweet this time around though, haha.

Honestly, I thought we were going to get one waist high shot as Lois says something to the effect of "Go get 'em, Tiger" and then he flies for the first time and then she calls him Superman. Low expectations for suit time = very happy with the Finale even if we didn't get like a publicity shot type shot. That's just how I feel about it though, I know everyone had different expectations going in. I loved everything about Lex in the Finale, haha.

Hey now! hahaha. I warned everyone that there was a '_Lana Talk_' chapter coming up soon! haha. I tried to offset it with some Clois-fluff! haha. Actually, I wrote it for like the next morning after the Plane scene in the Finale because I figured that was the first logical time for them to have this conversation after Lois talks to Toyman. But I hear what you're saying. Clark should have had _the talk_ earlier than this, haha.

I used to picture Armie Hammer as Bruce Wayne, but now I'm not so sure. I'm picturing Matt Bomer now, haha. I think he's more of that perfect balance of steely for when he is Batman and playboy-ish as Bruce? Yep, I'm going with Matt Bomer now, haha. As for Vicki Vale, I like Odette Annable from _Breaking In_ (CAN'T BELIEVE IT GOT CANCELED!) because I picture Vicki kind of tall and lanky, so yep. I might just have to write that kind of chapter just to get Clark all frazzled, haha. He's gotten far too comfortable, hasn't he? haha. It's time to put him on the defensive!

You'll get your fix soon enough! haha. I'm working hard to get that one just right!

Yeah, that was in the back of my head as I wrote it. I was thinking about using lines that would mirror what he says to Lana about Lois making him feel like he can fly and stuff like that. And in this chapter, I don't think there will be any question who he belongs to anymore! haha. HINT HINT!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Haha, he is such a dork, isn't he? hahaha. Oh yeah, she's going to kill him...by wearing him out! Oh snap, haha.

_**RPadavan2**_ - Thanks! I know a lot of people wanted to see Vicki find out that after all this time, Lois ended up getting together with Clark. So, it felt pretty natural to write it that way, haha. I've finally gotten to one of the three! haha. Yay me!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, we'll cover it more in one of the _Doomsday_ chapters in a conversation between Lois and Lex. It's one of those things that you either love or hate, hopefully I'll be able to turn you! haha. But yeah, both Rosie and Cassidy Freeman slayed that scene. Amazing job.

I don't think we can ever have enough showdown scenes between those two, haha. Especially since I want to write them as physical scenes with the prometheus suit involved because that just adds another layer onto what is already a formidable villain. And yeah, I think the _Death of Superman_ bit will be a three chapter long arc that I'll release all at once. And yep, Lois is going to find out about Lex pretty soon.

Yeah, in my head Bruce is dating Vicki when he meets Lois and Clark. Then he dates Chloe when he joins the League. And then he ends up with Diana. I think that's the way we've done it so far at least, haha. Batgirl will be getting a chapter soon, could be three if I do one for each of Batgirl, Barbara Gordon, and then Oracle. Not sure yet, she'll probably get in some time as Dick Grayson's girlfriend to get her into some chapters.

Clois office is kind of tough because it's actually super long because it's a smattering of like three or four different ideas that I'm going to end up moving into other chapters, haha. But I will post it soon! Just got to figure out what I'm keeping and what I'm moving. You're getting Gold-K here. And then Hiro Okamura is the second Toyman, a boy genius that has a huge crush on Power Girl, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I totally get that vibe from her, she seems like she's having a blast in the Comic-Con photos I've seen. And that's hilarious, is wittle Tommy afwaid of the big bad Cassidy? hahaha. I want to run and watch _Rabid_ just because of that now! hahaha.

I think she's just too distracted by how he looks in the tights to stop him from leaving, haha. I bet she is just drooling away, hahaha. I'm sure if he pulled his shirt off, you'd let him get away with just about _everything_! hahaha. Yeah, uh huh, I'm sure you've never ranted about it! hahaha.

_**Mpj891**_ - You guys keep reviewing, I'll keep writing, haha. That seems to be the deal we have in place! haha.

**_clarkfan325_** - I love being able to do chapters that follow up on other chapters, especially ones that are originally written, if that makes sense? It's like we're creating our own little continuity here. I think that makes it a lot of fun because it starts to feel like the real thing, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Lois seems like the kind of person that has enough maturity to know that just because both she and Clark love each other dearly, that they've loved other people. Clark loved Lana, and I'm sure that Lois loved Oliver. I think that we're pretty naive to think that we only ever love one person, you just have to look at it as each of those past relationships were stepping stones to this one. That's the difference between love and _true_ love as Lois put it.

Haha, I can't say that's exactly what girls are like without getting into trouble! haha. But Vicki is a gossip writer, so I thought it suited her.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #152, Gold Kryptonite

**Author's Note:** This is a sequel to the _St. Patrick's Day_ chapter, and I don't want to sound cocky, but I think you're going to like this one! Enjoy!

* * *

Lois dropped the seat cover and rested her head against it with a groan, "I feel like I'm going to die."

He rubbed her shoulders for a few moments, trying not to chuckle as she mumbled. After a bit, he went to sit down on the edge of the bathtub. Much to their surprise, Clark immediately shot up and grabbed his butt, "Ow! Ow! Oh my god, what the..."

Lois looked up in surprise and pain, his yells were _not_ helping her headache. "What's wrong?"

"That hurts so...what is going on! Ow, ow, ow ow, ow ow!" he squealed, his face clenched in pain.

"Smallville! What the hell is wrong with you?"

Clark clenched his jaw and looked at her with a wary expression, "My uh...my butt hurts."

Lois immediately bursted into laughter, Clark was not very amused.

"It's not funny, Lois."

"It seems pretty funny, Smallville."

He clenched his jaw as he felt a twinge of pain, "Lois, it _really_ hurts!"

Lois cocked an eyebrow, "Well, drop your boxers."

"You're just trying to get me naked, aren't you?"

She snorted, "Like I have to try." Clark rolled his eyes, but Lois was serious. "Chop, chop. I'm waiting here. Show me that butt, Kent."

"I'm not going to show you my _butt_, Lois."

"Like I haven't seen it a thousand times already?" Clark gave her a pointed look. "What? I have. It's cute."

Clark sighed and slowly pulled his boxers down to give Lois a look at his bare behind, she didn't see anything until-

"Oh my god!"

She fell over in a fit of laughter. Clark looked at her in surprise, "What is it? Lois! What is it?"

Lois couldn't reply, she was too busy clenching her sides and rolling around on the bathroom floor.

"Lois!"

"You have a...there's a...Clark...you are such a...oh my god..." she panted, still unable to breath as she shook on the ground.

Clark rolled his eyes, "This isn't funny!"

Lois couldn't stop laughing, "Look in the mirror! Look in the mirror!"

He walked over to the mirror and tried to look over his shoulder at what she found so funny. And thats when he saw it. In curly letters.

**_Property of Lois Lane-Kent_**

Clark turned and looked at her, "Am I still drunk?"

"If you're still drunk then I'm still drunk! Because I'm seeing what you're seeing, Smallville!" she squealed.

He looked back at the mirror, "How can could this have happened? Even with Blue-K, I should have healed by now!"

Lois had finally managed to get to her feet, she threw her arms around his neck, "Don't worry, I think it's adorable!"

Clark whined, "I don't understand how I could have gotten a tattoo on my ass, Lois!"

She swayed back into the bedroom, searching for her phone so that she could send a picture to the rest of the League of Clark's tattoo. That's when she saw the receipt next to her phone on the nightstand. Picking it up, she returned to the bathroom.

"Maybe we should call these folks and find out?" she giggled.

Clark read the receipt for Metro Tattoo, with a groan, he dialed the number at the top of the receipt.

They huddled around the phone as they waited for the shop to pickup the phone. "Hey-lo, Metro Tattoo, what can I do ya for?"

"Uh...My name is Clark Kent, and uh...I found a receipt this morning-"

"And a tattoo on your ass, eh Kent?" laughed the man on the phone.

Clark grimaced, "Yeah...I was hoping you could fill in some of the blanks for me?"

There was a laugh on the other end of the phone, "Yeah, well, you came in here with some kind of goddess looking woman-"

"That would be my wife," Clark explained sternly."

"Uh...yeah, well, you came in here with your wife and this little vile of gold liquid, asked me if I could mix it with my inks. Didn't seem no matter of funny to me so I figured what the hell, customer is always right, ya know?"

Clark frowned and then groaned. Lois smacked him and whispered, "What?"

He grimaced again, "I must have melted down that Gold-K ring from the wedding..."

Lois snorted.

"Anyways, I asked you 'bout a dozen times if you were sure, but every time that pretty thing on your arm would either kiss you into submission or give you a glare somethin' fierce like she was gunna rip your head off, sure 'nuff, you were in an agreeing mood in no time."

Clark sighed, "Well, thanks for filling in some of the blanks. I appreciate it."

"No problem there, Kent. Tell your wife that if she ever wants to get that tattoo she kept talking 'bout, she can come on down, hell, I'd do it for free."

Lois grabbed the phone away, "This is that pretty thing on his arm, what tattoo?"

"Uh, you said it was some temporary tattoo you had before? Somethin' 'bout Lois and Clark forever on your boob, I'd be more than happy-"

Clark grabbed the phone back, "She's fine. I don't think that will be necessary, thank you for your time."

He promptly hung up the phone before the man could reply. Lois looked up at him with an amused expression.

"Jealous much?"

Clark eyed her saucily, "Well, Mrs. Kent...I'm not letting nobody but me have a look at any part of you that isn't your face."

Lois grinned and put her arms around his neck, "I don't know if you've heard, but you're _my_ property, Mr. Kent. Not the other way around."

"Well then..." he told her, picking her up so her legs wrapped around his waist. "...let's see what I can do to make you mine then."

She smiled, "Lets."

As Clark carried her back into the bedroom and they fell onto the bed, there was one thing left to be said. "Ouch! Watch my butt!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I was talking to Katlynne the other day about having chapters for each of the kryptonites and that it's going to be difficult to come up with something for each of them, like Black or Silver for instance. And for whatever reason, this idea just popped into my head and I thought, "Hey! You can connect it with St Patties Day and make a little sequel out of it", and here it is, haha.

I hope you guys like it! Shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Either _Hiro Okamura_ or _Stargirl_. I haven't decided!


	153. Stargirl

**Review Comments:**

_**clarkfan325**_ - Thanks!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I absolutely loved that line! I want to work it into _every_ chapter! haha. I want to write a continuation of that future scene, so yeah, I'll probably find a way to incorporate that whole scene, haha. I'd be more than happy to do it! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Uh huh, whatever you say, haha. How can she be concerned when he is screaming about how much his butt hurts? hahaha. I'm pretty sure she loves the tights like he loves her Stiletto leather, hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it! haha. Hopefully the next few chapters will be good enough to deal with them expectations, haha. I might have to write something where Bruce or Oliver finds out about the tattoo, hahaha.

_**sasslady**_ - Yeah, I'm thinking along the same lines that we saw during _Luthor_ where Clark Luthor was scarred by Lex with the Luthor crest? I'm excited to write some Lois and Lex scenes, they are two of my favorites and you know that any interactions between the two are going to be intense.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Well, I have to admit, I'm confused by the Gold-K in Smallville because Lex used it to scar Clark Luthor, which was my inspiration for this chapter, but then they seemed to imply it could take away Clark's powers. Maybe because it was a ring that was going to be impossible to take off? I don't know for sure. But I'm thinking of it like Blue-K, but any injuries remain like the scar on Clark Luthor's arm instead of healing like they usually do when the Blue-K is taken away. Honestly, I'm not sure though, haha. Just playing it by ear, haha.

I know that a lot of people long to see jealous Clark, haha, so it's little moments like that where I feel like I can get away with it, haha. I'm more than happy to help with the questions! hahaha. I love these characters and these stories, so it's fun to share what I know! I plan on writing one alright, haha. How can I not have Lois and Lucy drunk together? hahaha. Can you imagine the shenanigans? haha.

_**lilbit4**_ - I'm working on it! haha.

**_cathy03_** - Hahaha, don't get too excited now! hahaha.

_**Mpj891**_ - I think I'll have ideas for a while, haha. I've just got to make more time for writing them so that I don't get so behind when things don't go to plan! Hopefully I'll be able to stock up so that we don't have these long waits, I missed your guys' reviews!

**_tnb24_** - Haha, I'm glad that you liked it!

_**RPadavan2**_ - It's pretty hard to top Gay Clark, haha.

**_NeverSayNever95_** - Haha, I try and avoid getting too depressing, though the upcoming _Death of Superman_ chapters will be a bit on the sad side at times but that kind of comes with the territory. Anyways, I'm glad that I could make your procrastination a little bit better! haha.

_**Jaclyn Parker**_ - I know right? I think the mental villains are even worse than the physical villains, not that I don't want to see Superman throw down with a baddie that can take a punch or two, haha. I already miss the show! A friday without Smallville was so sad! haha. I was torn between it being Tess and Chloe, but at the end of the day, Chloe is a beloved character, so I kind of figure it would be Tess too. I'm not sure whether you are saying you are for Lex remember or not though, haha. I can live with it either way, but I prefer him remembering, just sounds new for Lex and he needs that.

I'm glad that I could bruise you! hahaha. Yeah, there chemistry was off the chart from Day One. Her first scene in Season 4 made me so giddy, and I haven't been disappointed a day since with Erica Durance's Lois Lane. Thinking about how we'll probably never see her as Lois again makes me super sad because I'm not sure that anyone will ever come close. I like Amy Adams a lot, but she doesn't seem like she'll be _that_ kind of Lois.

Hahahaha, you got a what? hahaha. I'm sure that not only is there a big chunk of what Oliver had, but I'm sure that there is plenty of Gold-K out there somewhere in Smallville if Jonathan Kent thought he could find enough to buy back his farm. Makes you wonder, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I'm glad that it was exciting for you! haha. I know how much you guys love jealous Clark, so I had to bring him out there, haha. I might have to write that chapter just so that Clark can even the score, haha. I can already see some of the possibilities, haha.

My first exposure to him was when he was cast as Batman for the Justice League movie, and a lot of people liked him for Superman. My first time seeing him act was in _the Social Network_ too, so he was a top choice for me as a younger Bruce Wayne. Yeah, I totally fell in love with Matt Bomer on _Chuck_ and then later on in _White Collar_, he was pretty good in the _Texas Chainsaw Massacre_ prequel too. I don't hate Christian Bale's Batman, but he is a bit older than I picture my Bruce and I'm not sure he can be, like you said, the charmer Bruce Wayne that he ought to be off the clock.

Yep, Lois is going to kick his butt in a little bit, haha. And yes! I'm working hard on it! haha. If I'm going to do it, I should do it right!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bara

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #153, Stargirl (for Wednesday)

**Author's Note:** I know, I know, I've been horrible! But I just moved into a new apartment, and despite the "it will be hooked up for the day that you move in" promise I got from the phone company, they still haven't hooked it up. I had to borrow a friend's "MiFi" device, which is actually really awesome btw, to get online and post these chapters! And yes, there was an 's' at the end of that, as in three chapters now for Wed, Thur, and Fri and three chapters tomorrow for Sat, Sun, and a bonus chapter for being so patient with me! haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Kara sighed an agitated sigh, causing Zatanna and Courtney to roll their eyes.

"Would you calm down?" muttered Courtney.

"What?"

Zatanna chuckled, "You're about to blast her across the room with your heat vision, that's what."

Kara gave her an unamused look, "_They_...would probably get in the way."

The girls laughed as Kara shot Karen another impatient look. They were waiting for Karen to finish up with work so that she could come with them for lunch and Kara was still holding a grudge against her because of her...uh..._enhanced_...assets...from Earth-2.

"You are totally obsessing over this," accused Courtney.

"I am not! I'm just a little...I mean...we're suppose to be the same, and uh...well...we're so obviously not. That's all," explained Kara.

"You're engaged, Kara. Why do you even care? Bart loves you just the way that you are," offered Courtney.

Zatanna nodded, "Let's face it. If he was worried about boobs, he'd be checking me or Lois out."

Kara couldn't deny that one.

"Hey guys!" The trio looked up to see Karen standing in front of them, "Ready to go?"

Courtney nudged Kara, who finally piped up, "Yeah."

Karen frowned, "What's wrong?"

Kara avoided her eyes, "Nothing."

Karen looked at the other two, who were waving their hands over their chest. Kara caught this and sent them both death glares.

"Really? Are you still upset about these things?" Karen asked, her hands cupping her breasts.

Kara rolled her eyes while looking around awkwardly at Karen's actions, "Of course not."

Karen gave her an unconvinced look, "Watch this. Dexter!"

A young man, who had the appearance of a young college student with his band t-shirt and his scruffy chin hair, raced over to Karen's side.

"Yes, Ms. Starr?"

All four of them noticed how his gaze fell to Karen's bust. Dexter did not notice the way Karen rolled her eyes. "How are those reports coming?"

"Uh..." he glanced down. "They're going pretty-" he glanced down. "-awesome."

"Awesome?"

He paled nervously, "The reports, I mean. They're uh..." he glanced down. "...they're shaping up nicely," he finished with a smirk.

Karen nodded with an equal smirk, "What were the reports about again?"

"What?"

Courtney, Zatanna, and Kara shared an amused look as Karen roped him into her trap. "The reports. What were they about again?"

Dexter's mouth flapped, but no words came out. "Uh..."

His gaze fell down to her breasts again, so Karen placed a finger under his chin and pull his head up to look him in the eye.

"Go finish your reports, Dexter."

Dexter gave her a sheepish look, "Sorry, Ms. Starr. I'll get right on them. The reports I mean. I didn't-"

"Just go, Dexter."

He nodded and rushed out of the room. Karen looked at Kara with a quirked eyebrow, "Do you really want to deal with that all day?"

Kara laughed, "I guess not."

Zatanna let an impish smile form on her face, "I think I can help with the situation."

The trio looked at the brunette with confused looks, so Zatanna smiled and said, "TSUB WORG EERHT SEMIT NI EZIS!"

Their confused looks continued, though they changed into looks of surprise as buttons flew from Kara's shirt.

"What's going on?" shouted Kara.

Zatanna snickered, "You're going to get a first hand lesson in what it means to be a voluptuous woman, Ms. Kent."

Kara looked down at the now considerable cleavage she showed in what used to be a tight dress shirt. "Wow."

"I guess I'm not the only one that's going to get gawked at during lunch," teased Karen.

Courtney pulled out her cellphone and scrolled down to a certain name, '_this ought to be interesting_...' she mused.

The four of them arrived at the restaurant, and Kara couldn't help but notice that the waiter was much more attentive to her than waiters usually were. She couldn't quite figure out why though, until she saw the way he took Courtney and Zatanna's orders before getting to Karen's.

"Oh..."

Karen smirked, "Nicer than usual?" Kara nodded, Karen wagged a finger over her chest, "It's the boobs."

Courtney watched with an amused look, a grin formed on her face as she heard a familiar _whoosh_ coming along.

"Who's got pizza?"

They looked up to see Bart standing before them, and suddenly, his sights were transfixed on Kara. "Uh...hey Babe."

Kara gave him a funny look, "Yeah?"

Bart looked up at her, then at her chest, then up at her, then at her chest, "Whats going on?"

"What do you mean?"

He gave her a funny look, "Uh..."

Kara frowned, "Not you too!"

Bart's jaw dropped, "What?"

"Even you can't take your eyes off these, these, these, these things!"

"Babe! I mean, how am I supposed to _not_ look at them?"

Kara let out a laugh, "You're unbelievable!"

"What?" shouted Bart. "It's not my fault! I can't stop myself!"

"That's ridiculous!"

"If a guy wants a kiss, he has to compliment a girl. And really, isn't staring the best compliment? I mean, what's a better compliment than '_I can't take my eyes off you_'? But then you want to kill us for staring! It's a total double standard! They're like eye magnets!"

Kara started to feel bad so she hurried around the table and rubbed his back, "Bart, calm down. It's ok, Honey."

Bart looked up at her, "Why do you even have those things?"

"That would be my doing," chimed in Zatanna.

"I think she was trying to show her what it's like to walk a day in my bra," quipped Karen.

Kara laughed, "Yeah, and I think I'm over it. I'm sorry for spreading those rumors about the silicone, Karen."

"What?"

"Nothing," muttered Kara. "Uh...Zee? Think you can help a girl out?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to do something with Kara and Karen, and I just had this funny idea about Zatanna giving Kara a couple extra cup sizes so that Kara could understand that while they look nice, large breasts come with some downsides too, haha.

Anyways, off to the next chapter!

**Next up:** _Clois' Office_.


	154. Clois' Office

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Jucy

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #154, the private office of Lois Lane-Kent and Clark Kent (for Thursday)

**Author's Note: **Not much needs to be explained, Lois hates Cat, Jimmy is a goofball, Lois loves Clark? haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Stupid little twit," mumbled Lois, her hands were full so she used her back to push her office door open. "Try and tell _Lois Lane_ how to write a _Superman_ story? You must be out of your mind, Blondie."

Lois placed her prize on her desk, starting at it with a victorious smirk. She pulled a silver object from her pocket and licked her lips.

"Who does she think she is? What are they smoking downstairs? Doesn't she know who she is dealing with? Oh my god, this is sooooo good..."

"Lois?"

She looked up to see Clark standing in the doorway, he pushed his glasses up his nose and frowned at her for a second, "Is that…is that ice cream?"

Lois pulled the spoon from her mouth with a pop. "Uh…maybe."

Clark smirked, "Did you know that Cat is downstairs looking…for ice cream?"

"I uh…I had…I have no idea what you're talking about, Dear."

"You don't?"

She shook her head, "Nope. Not at all."

He couldn't help but chuckle, "Are you sure?"

"Uh huh." Lois shifted her eyes guiltily for a second, "What did you want again?"

Clark snickered, "Perry wants us in his office."

She grimaced, "How many 'Great Cesar Ghosts'?"

"Just the one, but that was because Jimmy put sugar in his coffee again."

"I keep telling him he needs to pay better attention."

Clark chuckled and shot her a grin, "I guess I can understand how everything seems to go out the window when you've got a Lane on your mind."

Lois tried her best not to smile, "Cute."

He smirked, "I'm not going to forget that's Cat's ice cream."

She made her way towards the door, pushing past Clark with a huff, "Damn it, Smallville, you can move a planet but you can't forget one simple fact?"

"I haven't forgotten how much you like it when…" he whispered as he pulled her into a deep kiss. When Lois came up for air, she looked all matter of dreamy.

"You better keep that up if you want me to kiss you instead of kill you," she quipped.

Clark smirked, "Don't I always?"

She was about to lean in and kiss him again when-

"Lane! Kent! Great Cesar's Ghost! I'm not getting get any younger here!"

The two scampered out of her office and towards Perry's office before he could get any angrier at the journalist duo. They grimaced when they saw the vein in his forehead. "You two better not've been playing your little game on company time," he barked.

His tone and face implied he was angry, but Lois and Clark knew better so they just kind of rolled their eyes and went with it. "Wouldn't think of it, Chief."

Perry snorted, "Then why is maintenance always getting called about a broken lock on the copy room downstairs? You know what? Never mind. I don't wanna know." They shared guilty looks as Perry tried to shake the image from his head. "Look, I'm called you two in here today because it's a waste of time trying to keep the two of you apart. Doesn't matter what your stories are, you two always seem to find a way to get paired up," muttered Perry.

"What are you getting at here, Chief?" asked Lois.

"What I'm getting at is...I think it's about time I make you two officially partners. For good. With the office and everything."

Clark grinned like a little boy on Christmas, "Really?

Perry nodded, "You may seem like a mild-mannered reporter, but listen, not only do you know how to treat your editor-in-chief with the proper respect, not only do you have a snappy, punchy prose style, but you are, in my forty years in this business, the fastest typist I have ever seen."

"Golly."

He grimaced, "Really, Kent? Golly? How are you going to charm your sources into giving you a scoop with a word like _golly_ in your vocabulary?"

"Works on me," quipped Lois.

He shot Lois a dirty look, "Kent, if you want want to be a top reporter with your wife here, you're gunna have to update your vocabulary, Son. I mean, great shades of Elvis, you're being promoted to star reporter here. Better yet..." Perry looked up into the bullpen, "...Olsen! Get me a thesaurus!"

Lois and Clark both turned to see Jimmy look up like a gopher out of his cubicle, then trip over his bag as he ran out.

"That kid...I don't know what I'm going to do with...anyways! I've got a line on a story, seems like Luthor has been digging at his old geothermal facility from way back when. Now, I know that doesn't seem odd to the untrained eye, but I've got a feeling about this one," explained Perry.

The couple stood and nodded, Clark gave his editor-in-chief an appreciative smile, "This is going to be swell."

Perry groaned as he watched the duo retreat to _their_ office.

"Swell? Did he just say swell? Great shades of Elvis, these kids are going to be the death of me."

"Chief?"

He looked up to see Jimmy Olsen standing in his doorway with a big yellow book, "I've got the thesaurus you wanted."

"Olsen...Clark Kent...is without a doubt...the slowest person in this entire building, and you couldn't even beat him out of the office?"

Jimmy grimaced, "I can try and catch him, I think I saw him going to into Ms. Lane's office."

"No!" Jimmy jumped, causing Perry to feel bad. "Sorry, Son, but you don't want to see what's going on in that office right now..."

"Is she killing him, sir?"

Perry shuddered, "No...she's not killing him..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I wanted to do something where Perry promotes Clark out of the basement, and after a conversation with Katlynne, this all kind of fell into place. Off to write the next chapter! I hope you guys liked it!

**Next up:** _Parent/Teacher Conference_.


	155. PT Conference

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Chlollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #155, Parent/Teacher Conference (for Friday)

**Author's Note:** This one is pretty straight forward, hope you guys like it!

* * *

"Aren't we supposed to go to these things at the end of the quarters? Isn't this a little early?"

Clark shrugged, "I just hope nothing happened with her powers."

Lois shook her head, "She's never do something stupid like that. She knows we'd kill her if she did."

"I had a lot of close calls when I was her age, Lois. It's really easy to lose control when you're upset or scared."

"Judging by the way you roped me into the backseat earlier, your control isn't so good at this age either," she teased.

Clark grabbed her hand and pulled her close, "I didn't hear any complaints out of you."

Lois grinned up at him, "Well, you know me, Smallville, I'm pretty easy when you put on the ole Kent charm."

They began to close the distance when there was a cough from behind. They turned to see Jo'an standing in the middle of the hallway.

"No hankey pankey, Mom! Come on!"

Lois rolled her eyes, "Why does she always blame me for it?" Clark gave her an funny look, Lois smacked his arm. "Shut your face, Smallville."

The two followed their daughter into her classroom. Jo'an took a seat dead center and nodded to the desks to her left and right. Lois shrugged and took a seat at one of the desks, Clark was a little less enthused about sitting in a child's chair.

"I think I'll stand."

The teacher walked in and shook each of their hands, "Hi, I'm Mrs. Abernathy, I am Jo'an's teacher."

Jo'an rolled her eyes.

"Don't we usually do these things at the end of each quarter? She's only been in school for a couple of weeks," asked Lois.

Clark shot Jo'an a worried look, but she just rolled her eyes again and sighed.

Mrs. Abernathy looked over at Jo'an with a disappointed look, "I've called you in because we need to talk about your daughter's behavior."

"Her behavior?"

Mrs. Abernathy nodded, "We were partaking in a conversation about local businesses vs. national corporations, and Jo'an took a very staunch stance on the topic. I took the liberty of jotting down some of the more colorful statements that she made."

She handed Lois a piece of paper. Lois looked up from the paper guiltily, then looked at Jo'an. "You said this?"

"Uh huh. Mrs. Abernathy said that big companies like Queen Industries and Wayne Enterprises hurt the little man, so I told her-"

"I can see right here what you told her."

Jo'an gave her a '_so?_' look. Lois clenched her eyes as she handed the paper to Clark, waiting for him to start killing her. Instead, he snorted. Now it was his turn to look at the teacher with a guilty look, "What you have to understand...is that...uh...well..."

"What my husband is trying to say is that...Mr. Queen..._and_...and Mr. Wayne...are uh...how would say...uh...friends of the family?"

Clark nodded, "Mr. Queen is basically my brother-in-law and uh...well...Mr. Wayne...well...he is uh...he's a very close friend."

Lois added, "They are basically uncles to Jo'an. So, really, I think you understand-"

"What I understand is that one of my students said, 'shut your face about my Uncles, twit', and that is completely inappropriate."

She grimaced at the teacher's words, "Well, being fiercely loyal, borderline irrational, it's uh...it's a Kent thing."

Both Jo'an and Clark snorted. "It's a _Lane_-Kent thing," they muttered in unison.

"Shut your faces, you little twits," Lois whispered harshly, and then immediately clapped a hand over her mouth and look at Mrs. Abernathy.

The teacher gave Lois a sharp look, "I guess I can see where she gets it from."

"Yup," added Jo'an.

Lois gave her daughter a look, "Watch it, Monster. The Kiss-or-Kill game doesn't just pertain to your father, Missy."

Jo'an gulped.

"Did you just threaten to kill your own daughter? And did you just call her a _monster_?" asked Mrs. Abernathy.

"Uh..."

Clark stepped in for Lois, "It's just a game...that they like to play?"

The teacher eyes Lois for a moment, "I don't think I need to stress the importance of respect in my classroom, Mr. Kent?"

"Of course not. I'll have a talk with her." Mrs. Abernathy gave Clark a look, so he added, "Jo'an too."

Lois scoffed, causing the teacher to give her another sharp look.

"Sorry."

Clark gave Mrs. Abernathy an apologetic look, "I assure you that we're going to have a long talk when we get home."

Jo'an and Lois both stood, gave the teacher a fierce glare, and followed Clark out of the classroom. Once they were out in the hallway, Lois and Jo'an started in about Mrs. Abernathy to Clark's dismay. "That teacher in there needs to learn to shut her face about Ollie and Bruce."

"Stupid twit," muttered Jo'an.

Clark groaned.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I hope that nobody looks down on Jo'an for her outburst, haha, but she has to stick up for her uncles and my little niece called someone a twit the other day and I just couldn't help myself, haha.

Anyways, I better get cracking on the next chapter! Let me know what you guys thought!

**Next Up:** _Hiro Okamura_.


	156. Hiro

**Review Comments:**

_**sasslady**_ - Haha, I know right? Little Jo'an is the best of both worlds! haha. Jimmy and Perry were so awesome on the Lois and Clark TV show, I highly recommend them if you really want a Jimmy/Perry fix, haha. And yes, boys will be boys and there's just no changing them, haha.

**_cathy03_** - It's a guy thing, haha. I can't explain it, haha. Well, they weren't in the same office when we saw them in the future at the end of the Finale and yeah, haha. I don't know, I just know that they weren't in the same office until we see them in _Homecoming_. So I used this as my chance to write that chapter, haha. That was my favorite part of that show as well, haha. Lane Smith was _the_ Perry White. No doubt.

Well, mygyps17 is a Chlarker deep down, so I think she prefers writing those kinds of stories. But I think someday, somehow she'll come back around and finish that story. At least I hope so! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Can you blame the guy? hahaha. I meant to put it in the Author's Note, but I wanted to show Clark talking that way because I think that was the last leg to get to the Christopher Reeve Clark Kent. I love it when he says that stuff, haha. I just wanted to update it for the modern times and have Perry in shock, haha. I'm not going to lie, I often picture Jimmy in the exact same way, hahaha.

That is such a good idea! haha. I might have to do a follow up where she's impressed with how he has traiend Lois and Jo'an and hits on him, haha. Instant revert for Lois! hahahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I bet you of all of them are going to hate me the most! haha. It's been insane not having internet, I don't know how I ever lived without it! hahaha. Yep, I reckon that the Lane-Kent's are going to be a thorn in that poor teacher's side for a long time, hahaha. They are such a troublesome duo, haha.

Haha, I'm glad that you liked that! Originally it was just Karen, Kara, and Courtney and then I thought, "it'd be funny if somehow Kara had to walk a day in Karen's shoes." And boom, that means Zee is there. Then it was, "wouldn't it be funny if Bart saw that," and boom, you add Bart into the mix, haha.

I'm glad that you liked having the gang back together! I missed them, haha. Had to write 'em.

**_NeverSayNever95_** - I really wanted to add his dorky speak because I think that's the last bit before he gets to be the Christopher Reeve version of Clark Kent. He already has the 'Ms. Lane' down so well, haha. Oh, Jo'an will be saying that many times in the future, haha. The first time I wrote it I was like, "Yup, this is gunna stick around."

_**Lilbit4**_ - I'm just lucky that mygyps17 lets me write her! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Troublesome Zee and Lois-Taught Kara, haha. Sounds like a sitcom, haha. I loved that idea! haha. And it's all thanks to you! He's scared of what he'll see if he goes in there! hahaha.

_**Jaclyn Parker**_ - I don't know, haha. I might have to have you help co-write that one, haha. As a guy, I'm not sure I'm well suited to write that one, hahaha. But I'm glad I got the rest right! haha. A whole new computer? haha. I better start saving up, you seem to be spilling stuff all over the place! haha.

I'm glad that I got the kid bit right, haha. It's hard because sometimes I end up writing Jo'an like an adult because she's kind of way more mature than she ought to be, haha. But at the same time, I have to remember to give her a short attention span and kid goggles at times, haha.

_**lostieamyethyst**_ - I'm glad that you like them! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided Hiro/Karen

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #156, Hiro Okamura (for last Saturday)

**Author's Note: **I know you all probably hate me, but here is the truth: I still don't have internet. How insane is that? I've been moved in for almost two weeks, and I have been living like it's the Dark Ages or something, haha. All because "you have an active account with another apartment, and we can't transfer it until that account deactivates on June 1st." I was like, "Uh...just deactivate it and move it over?" and of course I got the "I'm sorry, sir, but we can't deactivate accounts until the end of the month." Ok then, it's June 2nd, why haven't you transferred it yet? Ugh, anyways.

I've really missed you guys and I'm hoping to get this all resolved very soon, but in the meantime, I'm at a friends house and I wanted to post everything I had in my Document Manager, so here are three chapters! I plan to get caught up in the next few days because I'm expecting (fingers crossed) that it's activated tomorrow. Anyways, hope you don't hate me, enjoy!

* * *

Lois smirked, "Sounds like a job for Superman."

Clark rolled his eyes and knelt to begin his flight when Bruce grabbed his shoulder and halted his leap. "The meteorite is made out of kryptonite, Clark."

"What are we supposed to do then? If those missiles can't make a dent and neither of us can stop it, the planet will get wiped out," mutters Power Girl.

After a moment of silence.

Bruce grinned, "I've got just the guy."

_**one flight from Gotham to Tokyo later. . . .**_

"Watch the utility belt!" yelped Bruce as Karen set him down, his arms flailing about.

He looked over to see Clark and Lois red faced with contained laughter. "What? I couldn't just let her cradle me like you do with Lois!"

Karen rolled her eyes, "Where is this guy that you're so sure is going to be able to help us."

Bruce let out a huff, walking into the building towards the elevator. He pressed a button and asked for a Mr. Okamura. A moment later, it opened. They rode to the top floor of the building and when the doors opened, a small Japanese boy was standing there waiting for them.

"Batman! Oh, and you brought friends! Oh, and you brought Power Girl?" he wagged his eyebrows at Karen, who looked disgusted.

Bruce smiled a rare smile as Batman, "This...is Hiro Okamura."

Lois glared at Bruce, "This is your guy? He isn't even a guy. He's a boy."

Hiro gave her a funny look, "Hey Lady, I'm _all_ man. I can even show you if you'd like."

Her jaw dropped open in shock at his forwardness, Clark had started to step towards the boy with his eyes glowing red until Bruce grabbed Clark's cape and shook his head. Clark shot him a glare and stepped back, letting his heat vision simmer down.

"Look, that meteorite is crashing towards Earth, and I know that you have the equipment to stop it."

Hiro smirked, "I do."

They waited in silence for him to to do something, when he did knowing, Lois groaned. "Well?"

"What's in it for me?"

Clark frowned, "Existence? If that meteorite hits Earth, the damage is going to catastrophic."

Hiro shrugged, "I've got the most sophisticated fallout shelter on the planet."

"Then what do you want?" asked Bruce.

The boy scrunched up his face with what appeared to be deep thought before jutting his finger into the air, "I know. I want a date with Power Girl."

Bruce, Lois, and Clark each turned and look at Karen with the same hopeful expressions.

Karen scoffed, "No way!"

Hiro spun on his heel and walked towards his lab, "If you change your mind, you know where to find me."

Clark gave Karen a pain look, "Please?"

"What the hell, Clark? Are you trying to pimp me out or something? And if you are? I'm kicking your ass."

Clark flinched, "Karen, it's not that big of a deal..." he turned to look at Lois, "...is it?"

Lois fidgeted uncomfortably and tried not to look Karen in the eyes, "Uh...I'm sorry, Kare...I've gotta agree with Smallville here."

Bruce snorted.

"You can't be serious!"

"Well! It is the fate of the world we're talking about here," explained Lois, arms waving wildly. "Just you know...bat your eyes at the kid or something! Do a little of this..." Lois began to squeeze her arms and shoulders together, flapping around and making odd faces.

Clark shook his head, "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?"

"Having a seizure?" offered Bruce, to which Lois stared daggers at him for.

"No! I'm jutting out my...seriously, Kare, I mean look at those things!"

Karen looked down, then looked up confused, "What am I supposed to do with..."

Almost simultaneously, all three tilted their heads to the left and gave her a funny look. Karen finally got it.

"Oh..." Karen looked up and glared at them, "That's not funny! He's a kid!"

Bruce rolled his eyes, "It's not like we're asking you to sleep with him!" After a moment he turned to Clark, "Right?"

Now Clark rolled his eyes. "Of course not!"

"It's for the world, Kare," pleaded Lois.

Karen rolled her eyes with a huff. "Fine! But I swear, if you tell Kara I did this? You three are dead!"

She stomped away and closed the door behind her as she entered Hiro's office with a thud. Clark looked at Lois with fear.

"If she has to _kiss_ him, you know she's going to _kill_ me, right?"

Lois let out a chuckle, "Don't worry. I'll protect you, Superman."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, here was the first chapter! I hope that you guys liked it! For those of you that watched _Superman/Batman: Public Enemies_ (and if you haven't, you should! It was awesome!), you probably recognize a version of this scene. I tweaked it for my bidding, haha. Anyways, I'm off to take care of the next chapter, and hopefully you guys will stick around and read the next few chapters as well!

There will be a follow up chapter to this, btw, haha. We will get to see what happens when Karen convinces Hiro to help them, haha.

**Next Up:** _Ella Lane_.


	157. Ella

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with a brilliant idea from Jaclyn Parker

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Lanes

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #157, Ella Lane (for last Sunday)

**Author's Note:** Takes place during _the Finale_ and references the ending of _Abandoned_.

* * *

Clark mumbled to himself as he moved things around on the shelf in the closet. "Did she put them in a lead box or something?"

He was searching for his father's old cufflinks for later that day and he couldn't find them. Whether Lois wanted to admit it or not, they were going to get married today. Or he was going to get stood up at the alter today. Clark grimaced for a second, '_She wouldn't...no, she wouldn't do that...would she?_'

Shaking the thought from his head, he pulled down a box from the shelf and placed it on the edge of the bookstand. He wasn't sure if he was just getting _that_ good at being clumsy or if he was having himself a little high school flashback, but the box quickly teetered over and spilled it's contents to the ground. He let out a deep sigh before collecting up the items in question, stopping when he got to a little card that read:

_For your wedding day_

_love, Mom_

Clark smiled. He pulled over the box and saw the tape with the white label stating: '_For Lois, play on your wedding day._'

A sly smile formed on his face as he held the tape in his hand. He walked over to the closet and pulled out an old flannel shirt. He smiled as he rubbed his thumb over the fabric. A memory of Lois barging in on his shower years and years ago flashed past his eyes as he recalled all the shirts she had stolen from him over the years. He placed it on the bed with the tape and her mother's note, '_Even you can't talk your way out of this one, Lo._'

He gave up on finding the cufflinks and headed out the door towards the office to give Lois a little push.

**_later that day. . . ._**

Lois slid in the door, throwing her purse aside wildly. "Lois, you are such an idiot sometimes, you know that?"

She raced towards the closet and threw it open with a thud as it smacked the wall with a crash, not that she noticed. She plucked her wedding gown off the hanger and held it up in the mirror with a smile. "I'm going to get so laid on my wedding night!"

Her clothes flew every direction as she raced towards the bathroom, slowing as she started to frown and turn back. On the bed she saw her favorite stolen piece of flannel. Walking over to it, she saw her mother's note and the tape laying on top of it. She picked up the note and traced her thumb over the edges with a small smile growing, '_I am going to kill that farmboy...after he says 'I do' of course...well...maybe after the honeymoon...that's gunna be gooooood..._'

Slipping into the flannel shirt, she walked over to the couch and sighed deeply. Pushing play, she held her breath.

Ella Lane flickered onto the TV screen, she was laughing. "I think I'm starting to get the hang of this," she joked.

She couldn't help but laugh, wiping away a happy tear at the sight of her mother's smile.

"Lois...I know we've talking about your tall, dark, and handsome special someone. But the point of these tapes were to make up for the days that I want to be there, and the days that I won't. And one day that I would've have loved to have been there for...would be your wedding day."

Ella looked down and smiled, "When I met your father, I was so...taken...with his bravery. His courage. He wanted to save the world, and that...that was scary for a young woman. He was a soldier. He still is. For me, it was scary to be apart of something like that because I couldn't imagine him not coming home one day and having to be alone. But then I realized that...I couldn't...I didn't want to miss a single moment of my life that could be shared with him."

Lois smiled.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that...if you find someone...and it's for real. It's the kind of love that...that fills up your whole life. Your whole world. Then you have to hang onto it. And I know there will be times that you'll be scared. Scared because you can't imagine your life without that special someone in it, but that's how you know that someone is your true love, Lois," smiled Ella.

She brushed her bangs out of her face and continued, "They're your true love because they fill up your whole world and make it shine, make you feel like you have a purpose in life. I want you to find that person, Lois. Because whatever amount of time you have with them...it can be the greatest time of your life if you let it be. I know because even though our time is near the end, I wouldn't trade my time with the Colonel for one more second on this Earth."

Lois grinned because deep down, she knew that she felt the same way about Clark. He was her true love, and she was his.

"So," laughed Ella as she wiped a few tears away. "I made this tape for your wedding day. And I hope that hearing what I've had to say will help you make it down that aisle to start your life with a man that makes you feel all those things. And I hope that you have just as much love and passion in your marriage that I've had with your father. The only difference that I hope for, is that you have more time together."

Lois swallowed deeply as she wiped away her own tears before whispering, "I love you, Mom"

And almost on cue, Ella smiled. "I love you, Lois."

The tape burst into a gray static and Lois took a deep breath. A small smile started to form on her face, "I'm going to marry Smallville today."

Lois let out a girlish squeal as she bounced off the couch and made her way back towards the bed, she picked up her dress and smiled. She quickly disrobed from her flannel, throwing it onto a chair in the living room before slipping into her wedding gown and looking at the mirror. She thought about all that her mother had to say and she pulled out her notepad from her purse and began to write her vows.

When she was done, she stood on their bed and practiced her vows for a few minutes. Feeling content with them, she turned to look at herself in the mirror again as a warm feeling grew in her stomach. "I'm...I'm going to marry Smallville...today. I'm going to be Lois Kent today...Well, _Lane_-Kent..."

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard a voice from the door call her name. She pulled up her dress to her knees, hopped off the bed and sprinted towards the door as it opened yet again with Clark calling her name. She slammed it shut on him.

"Careful there, Prince Charming. It's bad luck to sneak a peek at the bride before you get to the alter..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I tried to work in bits in her mother's talk that would be in her vows later on, the true love bit and that little part about spending a part of her life without him, while adding in the needing a purse stuff from Season 9 and her little "a home is for real" part into Ella's speech about what a marriage should be. I like to think that Lois got pieces of her vows from her mom's speech and her outlook from her mother as well.

Anyways, off to do the next one! Thanks Jaclyn Parker for the idea!

**Next Up:** _Silver Kryptonite_.


	158. Silver K

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, Bruce/Diana, one-sided Lois/Richard, mentions of Lollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #158, Silver Kryptonite (for last Monday)

**Author's Note: **For a topic that I couldn't come up with anything for until recently, this one is super long, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Oliver leaned over the shelf with a sly smile, "Why does he even keep this stuff?"

"He is an orphan, Oliver. He collects things, just like you and me. Why do you collect your bows? Why do I have the giant penny or the old models of the Batmobile? Losing so much...it makes it that much harder to give things up," explained Bruce.

Oliver gave him a wide-eyed look, "Thank you, Dr. Bruce. How annoyingly heartfelt." Bruce rolled his eyes. "But we don't collect stuff that kills us, do we?"

Bruce shrugged, "Maybe he wants to catalogue the different kinds of Kryptonite."

"There are a crap load of kinds," admitted Ollie. "What do you think this kind does?"

They leaned over the radiation-proof-glass casing and looked at the rock in question with curiosity. "I've never seen silver before," offered Bruce.

Ollie looked over his shoulder and typed in the passcode, unlocking the glass. Bruce gave him a stern look, "How do you know the passcode?"

"Maybe he just likes me more than he likes you," teased Oliver.

"I already know the passcodes, I just don't know why he would tell _you_ of all people."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Bruce gave him a pitiful look while reaching into the box, "Do I really have to- Ouch!"

Oliver yelped, "What? I didn't touch you!"

Pulling his hand out of the box, he looked at his cut finger, "Not you, I cut my finger on the rock."

"Oh."

Oliver reached inside to pick up the rock, nicking his finger as well. "Damn it! Little sucker is sharp, ain't it?"

He turned to see Bruce pale with fear, "Oh my god, I hope Clark doesn't find out we touched this. Do you think he will? Do you? Do you?"

Oliver jumped back in fear before his own paleness set in, "I don't think so...do you think he will? Oh god, this is going to be worse than the time that I went on a date with Lois when they were on that morning tv show and _oh my god_, Clark is going to kill us!"

Deciding that the thing to do was to go to the Daily Planet and beg for Clark's forgiveness, they hopped in the Bat-Jet and left the Fortress in a blaze. They quickly stashed the jet at the Queen Industries hanger and made their way to the Planet. As Bruce and Oliver scrambled out of the elevator and onto the eight floor, Bruce suddenly had a thought. "You don't think he's going to be mad do you? I mean, he doesn't know yet...right?"

Oliver paled, "You know what? One time? I checked out Lois...and I don't know how to explain it...but he knew."

They both shuddered with fear, racing towards the Kent/Lane-Kent office when they ran into Jimmy Olsen.

"Hey guys!"

"I'm sorry, Jimmy, but we have to go find Clark," muttered Bruce as he pushed past the photographer.

Jimmy shouted, "Wait!" They turned. "Wow...they stopped...Uh, oh, Clark just ran out. Something about an elephant and a circus?"

Oliver clenched his eyes shut, "He's going to drop an elephant on me!"

"Uh...I don't know what that's all about, but Lois is over there talking with Mr. White," offered Jimmy.

Bruce nodded, "Perry?"

Jimmy shook his head, "Richard. He is Mr. White's nephew."

Both Oliver and Bruce turned to see a handsome man smiling at Lois, telling her some sort of funny story. Lois threw her head back with a laugh.

"Oh..." started Oliver.

"My..." added Bruce.

"God..." finished Oliver.

They both turned to each other simotaneously and shouted in unison, "Do you know what this means?"

Jimmy flinched at their shout, "Uh...no...but I have to get these prints downstairs, so uh...good luck finding Clark."

They waited for the young photographer to walk away and then Oliver broke down, "Lois is having an affair with that Richard guy!"

Bruce grabbed him by his jacket and threw him into the nearest office.

"Shut up! Someone is going to hear you!"

Oliver put his head into his hands, "Lois is going to fall in love with that Richard guy, and then they're going to break up, and their kids won't play with me and Chloe's kids and then we won't have double dates anymore and Clark's going to get sad and he's going to move in with you-"

"Why would he move in with me?"

"Because you're going to be single forever because you let this happen!"

"Me? How did I let this happen?"

Oliver paused, "Uh...I don't know...but uh...your costume looks ridiculous and you are named after a bat!"

Bruce gave him a dirty look, "And Green Arrow is better?"

"At least I didn't pick it! Lois did! And maybe if you had let her pick yours, then she wouldn't be having an affair! Picking your own name, you're such a tool..."

They had a slight scuffle until the janitor's broom fell and smacked Oliver in the face, "Fine! Fine! I give up!"

Suddenly, Bruce had an idea. "I can fix this..."

_**later on that night. . . .**_

Richard White entered his office, a sigh escaping as he shut the door behind him. He went to flick on the light, but it wouldn't turn on. He felt around for his desk to try and turn on his lamp, when he did, he jumped back with a shout when he saw a hooded man sitting at his desk. "Who the hell are you?"

"Hello, Mr. White."

Another man emerged from behind Richard, pushing him down into his seat. "Or should we call you...Mr. Homewrecker?"

Richard began to panic, "Who are you people? What do you want from me?"

"What do I want? Are you serious! Are you freaking serious?"

Bruce, without revealing his identity, yelled at Oliver, "Hey! Take it easy!"

Oliver turned to Bruce, "No man! You take it easy! Who's going to give us our kiss-or-kill moments? Me and Chl- uh..I mean, my girl? I don't think so! Not with my charm! And you and the Princess, ha! Let's face it, you're so whipped, we know there won't be any kill moments because you don't have pack enough in that utility belt of yours to ever tell her something she doesn't want to hear!"

"Uh...guys?"

They turned back to Richard, "What?"

Richard gulped, "Can I uh...you two seem to have your own thing...uh...going on...maybe I should just go?"

"No! You shouldn't just go. We have some things we'd like to talk to you about."

He paled, "Uh...like what?"

"Like your affair with Lois Lane, that's what," Oliver explained as he jabbed Richard in the chest.

Richard got a hopeful look, "Did Lois say we were having an affair?"

Bruce smacked him over the head, "No! She is devoted to her husband, who happens to be awesome."

"Awesome?"

"Stick to the plan, dammit!" shouted Bruce.

Oliver nodded, "So this is what you're going to do, Richie..."

The next day, when the effects of the silver kryptonite had worn off, Bruce and Oliver leaned against the table in the Hall of Justice having their morning coffee. Bruce turned and looked at Oliver warily, "So uh...last night...that was uh..."

"Yeah..."

"You don't think that Clark has heard about-"

"Hey guys!"

And just like that, Clark Kent walked into the room with a smile playing across his face. He walked over, grabbed himself a cup of coffee, and approached them with a grin. "So... what did you two get up to last night? Your wife called me about a dozen times, said you hadn't checked in."

Oliver swallowed deeply, "Uh..."

"But then I called Alfred and he told me that you had left with Oliver to go to the Fortress."

Bruce looked away nervously.

Clark grinned, "Yeah, so I figured you guys were off doing your billionaire playboy thing. Keeping up appearances. You know."

"Oh yeah, definitely. You know how it is. Booze.

"Yachts."

"Fur coats, you know, the usual," explained Oliver.

Clark nodded with a laugh. "Yeah, the usual. By the way, did you guys hear about Perry's nephew?"

Oliver exchanged a nervous look with Bruce before gulping, "No...what uh...what about him?"

Clark chuckled, "He put in a transfer to the Picture News in Central City. It's so weird."

"Why uh...why-why-why-why-why is that so weird?" asked Bruce.

The reporter shrugged. "He was the head of Foreign Affairs, it was a good job. His uncle was his boss, it just seems kind of weird to me."

Oliver shifted on the balls of his feet, "Didn't he have a crush on Lois?"

Clark grimaced, "Yeah."

"Well, then I guess it's a good thing he's gone. You shouldn't worry about it. Or look into it. Or anything like that," muttered Bruce.

Clark smiled, "Yeah, I guess so."

Both Bruce and Oliver sighed a sigh of relief. Clark started to walk out of the room before turning back, "Thanks for looking out for me, guys."

They shared a look of panic, Oliver paled, "You don't...you don't think he told...you don't think Lois knows what we did...do you?"

Gulp.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I know that Silver-K brought on a more intense, dramatic, and at times violent reaction for Clark, but let's pretend like it's less extreme for humans, shall we? haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it!

Off to the next one!

**Next Up:** _Not Sure_.


	159. General Store

**Review Comments:**

**_RPadavan2_** - I'm glad that you stuck around to welcome me back! haha. Honestly, I've been worried that some folks might not be here when I finally got back to posting. I still don't have internet, but I brought my laptop to my friends house so that I can post a few chapters until something gets worked out. It's a whole bit of drama I won't bore you with, haha.

I really liked writing Bruce and Ollie like that, I really tried to make them talk like teenagers, haha. It's not so much that I don't know what to write as much as it's what I'll have to write next, but I'm definitely going to write a Booster Gold chapter and I'm sure I can accommodate that Legion idea. But don't worry, I'll be writing for a long while, haha.

_**Leli1013**_ - I'm glad that you liked him like that! haha.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - It's glad to be back! Kind of, haha. Unfortunately, they _still_ haven't hooked up my internet. In fact, they hooked it up to the wrong apartment, if you can believe it, haha. Bunch of idiots over there, I swear.

I can't take too much credit for the Ella chapter, Jaclyn Parker had the brilliant idea. I just did my best to try and connect the dots and I thought it'd be a nice touch to have it lead up to that scene in particular and apparently it was well received, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm trying to catch up and get us back on that everyday pace! I know I've got enough ideas on the list to get us back to normal and then some, so just stick with me, I promise I'm not going to let you guys down! haha. I've seen girls do that kind of thing before and had the same though, haha, I had to make Bruce say it, haha.

And since Lois made Clark klutzy, I guess it's a perfect circle, haha. I'll work on having Lois find out! haha.

_**Ina100years**_ - I think that Clark is their hero, so they are always eager to be his favorite. I'm glad you liked it!

_**Katlynne**_ - I know that I'd watch that show! haha. I can just see Bruce pulling on it, giving him that little head shake, haha. It would be so funny to see that live, haha. I'm glad that you liked the Ella chapter!

That line from Bruce is from the comics, where he is yelling at Clark, it's a personal favorite, haha. I always wondered why Bruce had so much crap saved up in the Batcave. I'm glad that you liked it! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - To be honest, I haven't read a whole lot of Power Girl stuff so that's one of my top reference points. I loved that movie as a whole because you can't go wrong with a Batman/Superman team-up, haha. I'm glad that you liked the Ella chapter, I'm really happy with the way it turned out because it kind of fit together so well. At least for me, haha.

I might have to write a chapter where Lois and Clark find out, haha. You have to wonder how Clark finds out after all, haha. I'm already getting ideas about it, I can see the way it would play out in my head, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of the Lanes, mentions of the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #159, Smallville General Store (for May 24th)

**Author's Note: **In chapter 77, _Jor-El_, I implied that Ella and Moira's father had family in Smallville. I guess it might also make sense why Gabe Sullivan might have moved there (besides work) after Moira left because maybe they had family at one point or another in that time and where familiar with it. Maybe even had family there when they moved.

Anyways, hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

"Clark, you just picked out Lucky Charms, remember?"

He gave his dad with a funny look. "But _this_ one has a birdy on it."

Jonathan laughed, "Alright. We'll get Fruit Loops then."

They weren't even two feet form the Fruit Loops when Clark started to shout, "Dad! Dad! This one! This one!"

"Clark, what's special about this one? Cocoa Puffs has a bird on it too."

"Yeah..." Clark shook his head, "...but it's a _different_ bird."

A voice called from behind, "Don't worry, mine is just as bad."

They both turned to see a woman walking their way, the little girl sitting in the basket scowled at Clark as they pulled up.

Jonathan frowned, "I'm sorry?"

The woman smiled, "Ella. We met at the playground in Metropolis a few weeks ago?"

"Oh! Of course. How are you doing?"

"I'm doing well. I'm visiting some relatives in town while my husband is overseas, how are you and...was it Clay?"

Clark made a face, "Clay? What kind of name is Clay?"

Jonathan laughed, "It's Clark, and we're doing well. Just picking up some groceries, aren't we, buddy?"

Clark held up his box of cereal. "I got Cocoa Puffs."

"Chocolate?" squeaked the little girl in the cart.

Ella laughed and kissed her head, "My little Lois loves her chocolate."

Lois gave Clark a smile, "Chocolate is good."

There was a noticeable bit of slack in Clark's jaw as the girl stared him down. One cheek slightly rose to show a bit of a slanted smile began to form on his face. He looked at his dad, who had raised eyebrows, and then looked at Lois. "Wanna share?"

A wide grin erupted across her face, causing Ella to roll her eyes and Jonathan to chuckle. Without another moment of hesitation, she grabbed Clark's cart and pulled it towards her and hopped in beside him.

"Lois!" shouted Ella.

Jonathan waved her off, "It's fine. Clark won't bite, will you, buddy?"

Clark mumbled something incoherent as he tilted the cereal box towards Lois, causing her to smile. She quickly opened the box and grabbed a fist full of Cocoa Puffs, she stuffed her mouth and turned to Clark. "'s 'ood."

"Honey, don't talk with your mouth full," chided Ella.

Jonathan laughed, "If you think that's bad, watch this. Hey Clark, where did you learn _your_ manners?"

Clark turned with a wicked grin, "On a _farm_!"

"That..." laughed Ella. "...is the most adorable thing, I have ever seen."

Lois gave her mom a look that caused Ella to break into a fit of laughter, "Ok, maybe it's a close second."

The little girl smirked at Clark. "Hear that?"

In a surprise move, Clark pulled the box of cereal back towards his chest and smirked back. "See that?"

Lois gave him a look that made Clark gulp, almost as if she was going to kill him if he didn't give her some more of that delicious chocolate goodness. When he leaned the box back towards her, she grinned wildly and kissed his cheek.

His face grew red and hot as he rubbed the spot she kissed. He looked up at Jonathan, who was laughing hard with Ella at their children's actions. He started to get self-conscious while Lois just continued to eat her cereal. "What's so funny?"

Both the parents shared an amused look. Jonathan rubbed Clark's head, "Someday you'll know, buddy."

"Well, I think we better get going, we've got to meet up with my mother," explained Ella.

"Grandma Lily?" exclaimed Lois, standing up with her arms out.

Ella smiled, "Yes, Grandma Lilly." She turned to Jonathan and Clark. "It was nice seeing you two again."

Jonathan nodded, "Hopefully we'll see you again down the road."

Clark watched as Lois and Ella walked the opposite way, Lois cast a look over Ella's shoulder at Clark. It was a small smile that the two of them both shared until Lois decided to change it up...she stuck out her tongue.

**_many years later. . . ._**

Clark stood in the kitchen and watched Lois wolf down a bowl for Cocoa Puffs, a weird look formed on his face.

"Honey?"

Lois shot him a look with a mouthful of cereal, "'mm?"

He stared at her for another second, "Can I ask you a weird question?"

She quirked an eyebrow and swallowed her cereal. "You are a grown man and ask me on a daily basis where you tights are. I think I can handle it. You also have x-ray vision which makes it weird for completely different reason."

"When you were a little girl...did you ever meet a little boy at a playground? Or share cereal in a grocery store with one?"

Lois shook her head and took another bite, after a second, she spit it all out. "Holy crap, that was you!"

Clark laughed and nodded. "I just remembered."

"Woah," she exhaled, shaking her head in disbelief. "Do you know what this means?"

"That it's fate?" he smiled.

She gave him a funny look, "No...it means we're going to have an even more kick-ass-cute '_how we met_' story!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, how was that? haha. Once again, I had to leave out the General because lets face it, you wouldn't forget that man, haha. Also, I tried to make sure not to exchange any last names, so hopefully it's believable that Lois, Clark, and Jonathan won't remember this until well, until Lois and Clark remember at the end here, haha.

Anyways, off to the next one!

**Next Up:** _The El's_.


	160. The Els

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** The El's

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I'd be saving this for the spring and you would be watching it on TV.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #160, the El's (for May 25th)

**Author's Note:** I was originally going to use a lot of the _Superman: the Movie_ scenes for inspiration, but when I was re-watching _Abandoned_ for the _Ella Lane_ chapter, I thought that scene would be much more fitting for this chapter.

* * *

The Brain InterActive Construct lurked in the shadows, waiting for it's moment to implant the genetic matter on the hull of the infant Kal-El's ship. Jor-El continued to work restlessly on the ship in preparation.

Lara entered the laboratory, rubbing Jor-El's shoulders. For the first time, he let his focus be shifted.

"Did I bring this on our planet, Lara? Should I have given him his son back? Did I cause all of this?" he asked.

She spun his face, "Zod brought this on Krypton. You were right to deny him, he was blinded by his desire to feel the comfort of his son. There is no telling what could have become of the child if you had brought him back."

As they shared an embrace, the Brain InterActive Construct used it's super-speed to plant the genetic matter on the bottom of the ship. It was gone before either Jor-El or Lara could tell it was even there.

"I only wish that I could do something to comfort our own son, for he will suffer many nights wondering who he is. Where he is from. I cannot imagine the pain he will feel, I hope that you are right about the family he will join," she worried.

Jor-El kissed her hand, "If what we have seen is not enough, I know that the son of Hiram Kent will be a caring man." Lara smiled. "And if that is not enough, I have devised a way for us to send a message with our dear Kal-El," he grinned.

A smile erupted across her face as Jor-El shuffled over to his desk and picked up a small disk. "We have only enough time to send a short message, but we will be able to let him know how much we love him, and where he comes from."

Lara began to tear up. She could feel a sob begin to grow in the back of her throat as he directed her where to stand.

After a few moments with the disk, he walked back to her and stood by her side. He gave her a small nod that they should begin, Lara swallowed back her sob and put on a brave face for her son's sake.

"My son...I've only had the joy of knowing you for a few weeks," she paused as the room shook. "I wish that I could be with you always to guide you and protect you."

Jor-El swallowed deeply. "We don't have much time."

"My dearest Kal-El, our love will always be with you. I can already see you carry within you your father's independent spirit."

"But more importantly, your mother's never ending bravery and her compassionate heart."

The two shared a moment as Lara took Jor-El's hand.

"Your father tells me the new world you are journeying to Earth is full of complicated beings capable of great emotion. My wish is for you to live a full and wonderful life, but I need you to know that you were born of a great love. And your brilliant father has devised a way for you to carry on that love...without us," more of the ceiling began to cave.

"The ship designed to carry you to your destiny...can hold only one kryptonian. One who has so much potential, so unlike your father," he explained. He could feel the weight of his mistakes burrowing into his shoulders like the ceiling fell to the ground.

Lara would hear none of it though, she shook her head and kissed him dearly. Jor-El continued. "Your mother and I cannot come with you. To do so would be to burden your innocent soul with our frailties and failures. But you have within you the best of both of us. And I am sending with you all my knowledge, but none of my ego or regrets."

He held his breath for a second, thinking of how his actions may or may not have led his dearest and oldest friend to destroy their home. In his final moments, he knew he would always blame himself.

"They will die with me here, on Krypton." More fell, but he knew he must leave his son with _something_. Something to let him know that he was loved. Something to let him know that he is not alone. Something to show him that while they will never meet as men, he will always be proud of his son. "Whatever trials I put you through, I will never lose faith in you."

"Quickly, before it is too late," whispered Lara. "We may not have been able to save our planet..."

"We are confident that you will become Earth's greatest savior," finished Jor-El. "And never doubt that just as you are a part of us, we will always be a part of you. Farewell my son."

Lara let tears fall. "Farewell."

A light lit as the recording stopped. Jor-El walked over to pull the disk from the device and stepped toward his crying son's ship as he planted the disk. He stepped back as the rockets began to flare, he swallowed deeply.

The ship began to hover, giving the child's parents a final moment to see their child before closing and blasting away.

They stood there, watching it crash through the roof of Jor-El's laboratory. Lara allowed her tears to fall freely as she buried her face into Jor-El's chest. "I don't know whether to kill you for sending my child away, or kiss you for saving him."

Jor-El nodded, a tear slipping out of clenched eyes. "My heart is both broken and swelling as well, my dear."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I wasn't sure how else to write beyond that kind of somber tone because you really can't do much more when you're sending away you son to a distant planet to not only never see again, but you know that your death is extremely near. Kind of hard to imagine it being anything but kind of depressing.

I also wanted to add that bit about Brainiac because I've always thought, "Zod and Faora were already in the Phantom Zone when Clark's ship leaves. How did Doomsday's genetic matter get attached to Clark's ship?" But since Brainiac was apparently corrupted by Zod and plays an instrumental role in destroying Krypton, I gave him that task.

Anyways, let me know what you thought, shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Either_ Stiletto _or_ Earth-2_.


	161. Earth2

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - They are cute, aren't they? haha. I honestly think that of all the infamous couples in comics history (in both DC and Marvel), the Lois and Clark pairing has to be the most _in-love_ pairing of all. They're timeless and the standard for everyone else to meet, so I love having them just be sappy and dorky, haha.

**_Katlynne_** - I've always kind of thought of Oliver as my own Bruce Wayne for that reason, haha. I love Oliver Queen in the comics because he's such a wild man, but the Oliver Queen on the show reminds me a lot of Bruce (minus the drinking) because of the way he interacts with Clark. Would have loved to have them both on the show though, haha. I like to think about how they are the only humans on the team, and that makes them have to stick together a little bit.

I'm glad that I could do another enjoyable young Clois chapter! haha. I know, it wouldn't have been right without Julian Sands and Helen Slater to come back. I'm so glad that they did. I love the recurring roles reappearing in Season 10.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - After the blowout I had today with them, haha, I hope someone did get fired. They hooked up my internet two days ago, and then yesterday when I got home from work, it was out again. The guy on the phone actually told me that they hooked up the internet to the wrong apartment, and that they don't do service calls on the weekend. I'm pretty nice most of the time, haha, but I know that I was something else entirely on the other end of the phone, haha. The manager had to get on the phone and promise me that it would be up and running by tomorrow afternoon.

Anyways, I'm glad you liked the General Store chapter! I know that the young Clois chapter was a big hit a while back, so I kind of wanted to bring it back. I also wanted to write something with Ella, so it worked out really nice like that. I agree, I wish that Clark could have had more time with Jor-El, but at least he'll have that moment with Lois at the Fortress.

_**Leli1013**_ - Awwww, I'm glad that you liked them!

**_Mpj891_** - I'll see what I can do for a Part 3, I'm glad that it was up to expectations!

_**lilbit4**_ - Between Lois _and_ Clark? Little Jo'an has more adorable in her genes than she knows what to do with, haha.

**_cathy03_** - I'm glad that you liked it! I wanted to throw in a bit where one of them remembers, and for whatever reason, I came up with the cereal thing and it just tied together really well I thought.

I saw a window to throw in Brainiac, and I just went for it, haha. I'm glad that you liked it, it really is a tragic story.

_**alexindigo**_ - How can I complain about you not reviewing when I've barely been writing? haha. Hopefully I can churn out a boat load of chapters and get caught up and we can all get back to normal, haha. My days feel so weird without my usual write-ups. I feel like my whole schedule is off, haha. Plus, I really miss getting to hear from you guys!

I think that the sequel will be even better, haha. Clark is going to have to sit down and talk with his girls, hahaha. That whole sequence was perfect for me, I loved the rotating camera and the vows, it was just all around perfect and gave me everything I could have wanted for Clois on their wedding day. I loved both their performances to death!

The thing with Ollie and Bruce is that no matter what, they have to stick together because they are the humans on the team. I know we have Lois and Tess and Chloe and Emil, but they are the only humans that are on the field. Plus, their pasts are so similar and they have similar issues, it just makes them an obvious bro-mance, haha.

_**Kinnari3**_ - I'm still writing! And I'm glad that you liked the Ollie/Bruce bro-mance and the tender stuff with Ella. Sometimes I worry that I get too mushy with those kinds of moments, so it's good to hear positive feedback!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** one-sided Earth-2 Clois, one-sided Earth-2 Lois/Earth-1 Clark

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season. (I just realized I'd been using the old disclaimer when the show was already over, haha.)**  
**

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #161, Earth-2 (for May 26th)

**Author's Note:** Take place between _Crime Syndicate_ and _Power Girl_, and continues Ultraman's fall into villainess. BTW, I got an email that said my internet should be up and running tomorrow afternoon, so I'm hoping to churn out some updates quickly as I try and catch up, which I still intend to do! Here are three new chapters to tide you over!

* * *

Lois looked around the abandoned warehouse, '_Perry is out of his mind, there's no story here..._'

She started to turn when a large mess fell from the ceiling directly in front of her, she jumped back in shock. When she looked down to see what had fallen, she saw Clark Luthor coming out of his kneel with a smile on his face, "Hello, Lois."

A look of fear formed on her face as she grabbed at her purse for her kryptonite, "Get away from me, Luthor!"

Before she could reach a hand inside, he sped up and grabbed her arm. "I'm not here to hurt you."

Lois frowned, "You bribed Perry to get me to come here, didn't you?"

"I think that bribe is a strong word. I simply asked him to do me a favor, and he did it."

"Anybody with a brain knows that turning down Ultraman is like signing up for a trip to six-feet-under."

Luthor shook his head, "I'm not like that anymore, Lois. I'm the good guy now."

She scoffed, "The good guy? You are still out there hurting people. You're still the bad guy."

"No. Don't you see? I'm being their hero, Lois. Whether they realize it or not," he explained.

Lois shook her head. "By controlling them? By scaring them into doing whatever you say? You and your friends?"

Luthor frowned, "They don't know what's best for them. I'm protecting them from themselves."

She wanted to laugh, "You haven't learned anything, have you? You can't control people!"

"What am I supposed to do? You see how they turn on each other. They're creatures of greed! They'll continue to fight and kill each other if we don't step in to control them. We are making the world a better place, what else am I supposed to do?"

Lois gave him a look of pure disgust, "What are you supposed to...You are supposed to have faith! You are supposed to believe in people! You supposed to believe in their ability to be good! Clark Kent would never give up on-"

"Don't you bring him into this! Kent is a fool and coward! He is incapable of doing what needs to be done!"

"You will never be half the man that Clark _Kent_ is!" shouted Lois defiantly.

Luthor gritted his teeth in rage.

"You know, I thought for half a second that you could be like him. That you two had more in common than your powers, but I see you for who you really are. For _what_ you really are. You're the villain. He's the hero. You are incapable of being good."

"Lois...I'm warning you..."

She didn't back down, "Clark Kent believes in people, but all you want to do is control them. You're no better than any other slime out there."

He couldn't contain his rage any longer. he went from wanting to kiss her to wanting to kill her in a flash as she put him down and put Kent up on a pedestal so he lunged at her. But before he could reach her, a figure appeared from behind and grabbed him, tossing Luthor the opposite direction. Ultraman rose with a snarl, "You don't know who you are messing with."

"I know exactly who you are, Kal-L. You're the one I came looking for. Your father wouldn't have wanted you to become this."

Luthor frowned, "How do you know that name?"

The man smirked, "Your sister found the orb. She's a curious one, that Tess."

Ultraman's face twisted into a rage, he raced towards the man but the man simply deflected his blow and delivered one of his own to send Luthor to the ground in a cloud of dust. He knelt down to check to see if Luthor was still conscious, finding that he wasn't.

He turned and helped Lois to her feet. Lois looked at him in awe, "Who are you?"

The man smiled. "My name is Zod...and I'm here to help."

_**hours later. . . .**_

Luthor started to stir. He felt someone tugging at his shoulder, trying to help him up. He slowly opened his eyes as a woman leaned down over him, "Hey, can you hear me? Can you stand? Can you stand?"

He started to lean up, "Yeah, I can stand."

She brushed one of her brunette bangs out from her eyes, she gave him a smile. "Come on, get up."

He stood and brushed the dirt off his chest, showing her his infamous 'U' shield. Instead of being scared, she smirked.

"_You_ were down in the dirt? I thought you were stronger than anybody?"

Luthor couldn't help but let out a chuckle, "Who are you?"

She held out her hand. "Name's Lang. Lana Lang."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, did I bridge the gap between who Clark Luthor was in _Kent_ to how I wrote him in _Power Girl_? By now, I like to think he is the full-fledged villain that we know as Ultraman. I figured being turned down by Lois and once again mentioned as inferior to Clark Kent ought to be enough to turn him, kinda like Lex was on Earth-1 (but with Lana instead of Lois, of course).

I struggled to come up with a hero for Lois, but I think I'm happy with the Zod choice. I thought about having Tess do it, but I wanted someone that was able to go toe-to-toe with Clark Luthor. I considered Metallo, but that didn't seem right. But loving Callum Blue like I do, I decided that it was time to bring him back, and how fun would it be to see him as the hero? haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** _LuthorCorp_.


	162. LuthorCorp

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Clana, mentions of Clois

**********Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #162, LuthorCorp (for May 27th)

**Author's Note: **This takes place in that middle gap during Chapter #149's Stryker's Island Penitentiary. Enjoy!

* * *

Lex sat at his desk. Well, he was told it was his desk. Everyone seemed to think he was Lex Luthor, even though all the reporters he had talked to said that he had died. That he had been missing.

They said that Tess Mercer had taken over the company in his absence.

Well, he was back. Somehow. So that made this _his_ office. And that made this _his_ desk.

The thing was, he didn't remember anything.

It was all black up until he was standing in the window, watching some giant ball of fire head towards Earth. He had turned to run out of the room, to try and find out what he could do to help when he found Tess laying there. It scared him to think that maybe he had something to do with it. She was in a pool of blood, barely clinging onto her life.

Luckily, the doctors had been able to save her. But what she said when she woke up...it made him think that he had a lot more to do with it than what they had told the police. She had told them that someone else had hurt her, but the way she reacted when she saw him, he wasn't so sure.

He had since become the CEO of LuthorCorp. Supposedly, he already been the CEO in the past as well.

'_Not that I can remember any of that. I don't even know how to run a business_,' he mused.

"Mr. Luthor?"

He looked up to see a blonde woman standing in his doorway. Lex immediately stood up and walked around his desk, "Yes?"

"My name is Mercy Graves. I worked for your father," she explained.

His interest perked up at that last bit, "You knew my father?"

She nodded, "He instructed me to give you this in the event of his demise."

Lex's face fell, "He's dead?"

"I'm afraid so, Mr. Luthor. I'm sorry for your loss."

Lex nodded, "Thank you. You said you had something for me?"

Mercy nodded, "I had to check to make sure the office was secure first." She reached for her radio, "Bring it in, Hope."

A brunette walked in with a suitcase and handed it to Lex, "To open the case, you need only give it a DNA sample here."

Hope pointed to a small thumb size indent on the brief case. Lex nodded.

"I am also to inform you that in the event of Lionel Luthor's death, we are to work for you, Mr. Luthor," added Mercy.

Lex looked up, "You two are going to work for me now?"

They both nodded in unison.

"Ok, umm, do you mind if...could I have a few moments to look through this?"

Mercy nodded, "We will be outside if you need us."

They promptly exited the room while Lex walked back to his desk. He placed the briefcase on the counter, pressing his thumb to the pad. He flinched as the needle popped up to draw his blood, but after a few seconds, the briefcase beeped and the locks clicked open.

Lex opened it slowly, finding a lone flash drive. He plugged it into his laptop. After a few seconds, a window popped up. There was a folder that said only '_Intel_' and a video file that said '_Play Me_'. Lex clicked on the video file, and the video popped up to show Lionel Luthor.

"_Son...If you are receiving this briefcase, then I am no longer with you. It also means that I have succeeded in saving you. On this flash drive, you will find all the information that you need to know from your absence. It also contains top secret information relating to LuthorCorp and your recovery. I wish that I could be there with you now, but I trust that you will become an even greater man that I was. You will live up to your family name. There were times when we were ready to kill one another, others where we were the best of friends. But what's most important, Son, is that I will always love you. Goodbye, Lex._"

He smiled at Lionel's words. It sounded like his father really loved him.

Lex glanced at the file that said '_Intel_', with a deep breath, he dragged the mouse to it and clicked it. A list of subsidiaries and and property holdings came up as well as a long list of projects including the likes of Project Prometheus and Project Gemini.

One item in particular that caught Lex's interest was a file that was called '_LX Memory Banks'_.

He clicked it, bringing up a long list of files. The first one was called '_Base Log - 2/5/09_' with updates almost monthly. Each file was bigger than the last, he was willing to bet that meant that they were a total compilation of the Base Log and the updates. The last one was for '_5/13/11_'.

Lex eyed it with caution.

Given the way that Tess reacted to him, did he want to know the man that he was before? What if he was the person that hurt Tess? Would he want to know that person? Would he want to remember all the things he might have done in the past?

Deciding that he couldn't live without knowing who he was, he clicked the last file and a blur of images came onto the screen.

Lex grabbed his head in agony, but found himself unable to look away as images of his life flashed past. He saw his mother, and baby Julian. Then flashes of meeting Clark Kent and Lana Lang. Memories of Genevieve Teague and Milton Fine flashed past, along with his wedding to Lana and murdering his father. An ice fortress fell down on him and he recalled being tied up to a bunch of tubes. He saw flashes of Lois Lane with Clark and talking to Clark at the Mansion in ruins.

The last memory that he had slowed down to an almost real-time moment.

_He sat at a desk. This desk. The desk at his office at LuthorCorp. He opened up the same file that he was looking at a moment ago, except this time he was going into another menu and selecting upload. Before he could lean down to place his face against a machine on the desk, the intercom chimed._

_"Mr. Luthor, Tess Mercer has entered the building."_

_He leaned over to the phone, "Let her through."_

_Lex then moved back to the machine, it covered his eyes and a flash of light erupted._

He slammed back agains the glass, it cracked he hit it so hard. He was rubbing at his eyes. His breathing was ragged. He blinked and tried to clear his vision as he looked around the office and took in the familiar sight. He chuckled. "I'm never going to get used to that."

Just then, Mercy and Hope burst through the front door with guns raised. "Is everything ok, sir?"

Lex smiled at them. "It is now."

They nodded and exited the room again. He leaned over to the intercom, "Can someone get a hold of the press for me. I've got a few announcements to make about the company, first and foremost...there's going to be a change of name..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, the best I could do for a kill-or-kiss moment was Lionel's line about sometimes they wanted to kill each other, sometimes they were the best of friends, but hopefully you guys liked it. I know that I didn't really explain how he got his memories back before, so I wanted to do this. And lets face it, Lex had his memories back and that wasn't his real body. All those clones had his memories. There had to be some kind of memory bank.

2/5/09 was the air-date for _Requiem_, when Lex "died". 5/13/11 was the air-date for _the Finale_. in my mind, it works kind of like the Intersect works on _Chuck_ or how those memory scans worked in the movie _the Sixth Day_ where there were these encoded images that had all kinds of information, in this case, memories. The monthly updates could hold information from the Clones and from Conner and anything else I suppose. Anyways, it was nice to have a little Mercy Graves and Hope Taya action there too and I hope it wasn't too far-fetched for it to work.. I hope you guys liked it, shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** _Graduation_.


	163. Graduation

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** hints of Clois, mentions of Clana

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #163, Graduation (for May 28th)

**Author's Note: **Takes place during Season 4's _Commencement_.

* * *

Lois walked towards the Barn, but she wasn't exactly sure why. Clark was graduating later that day, and she knew that he was probably up in the Loft fiddling with his tie in that giant mirror he had up there.

'_I don't know why the boy has a mirror when it seems like he's never checked his outfit a day in his life_,' she mused.

She walked up the steps, a grin already playing on her face as she saw she was right.

"I realized hand-eye coordination isn't one of your strong suits. Here!" She walked up and wrenched the tie from his hands. "Let me help you with that." She wrapped the tie around her neck and let down to tie it.

Clark let out a sigh, "Lois, I'm not sure what I'm going to do without you."

She laughed, "Oh, come on, Clark. Your future's laid out right in front of you. You're gunna go to community college, major in agriculture, probably minor in law-enforcement, and then you and Lana are gunna have a nice little church wedding."

Clark looked up in surprise, "Excuse me?"

"It's written in the stars and you know it," she accused. "It's only a matter of time before you join the bowling league, take over the family farm, and then well, you and Lana can bring little Clark Jr into the world."

She wasn't sure why she had such a sharp tone in her words. Almost as if she didn't like this future she spoke of. She chalked it up as her imagination. After all, why would Lois Lane care about Clark Kent's future?

"I think you're hallucinating," he told her.

She turned him towards the mirror, "No...hallucinating would be imagining Clark Kent going off to the big city and make his mark in the world." She flung the tie around his neck, tightening it up tightly around his neck. "I'm just being realistic."

Clark groaned at the tightness of the tie, "Well Lois, what are you big plans after Europe? You going to go back to school? Maybe actually stay a little while?"

She rolled her eyes slightly. "I have a feeling if I'm going to get an education? It's going to be in the real world. You know, I took this career test in some magazine, it said my perfect job would be uh...a radio disk jockey."

"That would make sense, you talk enough. There won't be any dead air," he teased.

Lois glared, but deep down, she loved it. "You mock me now, Smallville, but you just wait and see."

"Journalism. Ever thought about that? You wrote some half decent articles at your short lived career at the Torch."

"Ah, kill me first. Even if I could spell, the last thing I'd want to do is spend my time in a newsroom. With my luck, I'd probably end up across the desk from the most bumbling reporter on the mast head," she countered.

Lois fell silent for a moment. '_Clark is a good writer...I could stand to work across from him...nah, he's gunna be a farmboy_.'

She looked up at Clark who was flattening out his shirt. '_A hunky farmboy..._' she mused.

"You know what? You actually look handsome for a change," she teased.

Clark didn't miss a beat. "Well, I'll take that as a compliment."

She eyed his crooked tie and she just couldn't help herself as she stood up to fix it.

"Look, I know we've had our disagreements in the past...and I will be the first to admit that I've made it my own little hobby to bust your chops," she offered.

Clark looked up at her, "I've gotten used to it. Besides, I know I haven't been the most gracious host."

Lois smiled at him, "You could've been worse."

"I don't know, I've been trying pretty hard. Even take extra long showers so you don't have any hot water," he teased.

She smirked up at him, "Is that _really_ why you've been taking those extra long showers, Smallville?"

He swallowed deeply at the fire in her eyes, but he couldn't break her gaze. "Maybe. Maybe not."

She clicked her tongue, moving her hands from his tie to his shoulders. "I didn't think so."

"Lois...I _really_ don't know what I'm going to do without you."

She moved in close, "Then why let me go?"

Their lips grew closer and closer, but when Lois opened her eyes, she saw Clark standing there. She was having another one of her fantasies about Clark Kent and she needed to say something to maintain her composure.

"Look, I just want you to know Clark, that when I'm sitting in the audience today at your graduation and you stand up on that stage in front of all those people, I'm going to be looking up at you and thinking one thing..."

Clark eyed her, "What's that?"

"Please God, don't let him trip," she quipped.

The look on his face told her that she had wormed her way out of another corner.

With a punch in the chest, she was turning and walking out of the Loft. As she walked down the stairs she let out a breath that she didn't quite realize she had been holding. '_Whew, that was a close one, Lane..._'

Clark watched her go and let out a small scoff. '_One second, you think she's going to kiss you, the next second she's punching you in the chest._' He looked out the window she walked into the house. '_I really don't know what I'm going to do without her. I don't know what it is, but I'm starting to have a hard time imagining my life without her in it..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I thought there were a lot of little moments in that scene where they were a bit more...I don't know...couple-y than they usually were. The whole tie thing, a lot of their glances, a lot of their pauses, I know that Clark is going to be all goo-goo for Lana in about two seconds, but still, I loved that whole scene.

I tried to make it reminiscent of the Homecoming chapter I wrote, both with the fantasy bit (this time it's Lois) and with the kind of _woulda-coulda-shoulda_ bit. I wanted Clark to say the same thing at the end that he said in the fantasy, almost to kind of imply that things probably could have happened that way. I don't know, haha. Hope you guys like it! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** I believe it will be _the Future._


	164. Future

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yes! It's really me! haha. I know I've been gone a long time, but I'm back! haha. Originally, I was thinking about using Metallo, but it might have gotten confusing with my future Metallo chapter.

Yeah, I figured that I was going to get a mixed reaction to the Lana bit, but here's my logic: What could be more opposite Clark Kent than ending up with Lana Lang? haha. I hadn't really thought about the powersuit, I just figured I'd throw her in there for a further departure from his Earth-1 counterpart. Now that I think about it, I probably should have made Super Woman be Lana Lang since we still have Lois as a good person instead of a bad one.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I think you said it perfectly, haha. Their awww story vs their awe story, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm working on my _how Bart met Lois_ chapter, so I think I might be able to help you get your fix, haha. I know we talked about it being Metallo, but I figured it would end up being confusing with the future Metallo chapter that we talked about, so I went with a new character instead. Plus, I just love Callum Blue, haha.

Yeah, it's Earth-2 Lionel. I thought you'd like that bit with the Intersect-esque update, haha. I thought that whole scene was brilliant, I'm really happy they set it up so that it was in line with the comics, though as you know, I still wish that Lex knew about Clark so that they could continue that whole dynamic.

Everything about that scene was perfect, haha. I love young Clois, especially when they didn't even realize that they had this amazing connection. Knowing what we know now, it just makes it so much better! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - They are in backwards world, haha. Borderline Bizarro World, haha. Well, if Clark is the villain, it only makes sense that Zod would be the hero, right? I don't know how it is supposed to be that way, but they always seem to find a way for it to work in the comics. If the Joker and Lex Luthor are heroes? Zod can be a hero, haha.

I'm glad that I helped it make sense. I could really see this happen because every time that Lex found out the truth early on in the series, there was always something to flip it back. This could be the reverse situation.

**_Mpj891_** - Thanks!

_**cathy03**_ - I figured that the best way to make Clark Luthor further from Clark Kent, have him end up with Lana in the end after he knew Lois in the beginning, haha. Seemed like the way to go, haha.

There are really only two heroes on Earth-2 that I can think of, and it's Alexander Luthor and the Jokester. But I guess if "all the heroes are villains" then all the villains should be heroes, right? I was down to Metallo or Zod, but I didn't want to confuse anyone with a Metallo chapter that I've got coming up. Zod made sense after that.

I'm glad that I was able to explain away some of the "Huh?" moments. I always wondered how the clones knew things that they really shouldn't have been able to, and then with Lex knowing everything mere moments after coming back? There had to be some sort of memory bank somewhere. Well, I had to have Lois fantasize about him, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bara, hints of Kara/Brainy

**********Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.**  
**

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #164, the Future (for May 29th)

**Author's Note: **Alright guys, I'm back. And I plan on catching up and getting back to my chapter-a-day pace. I know that I've said that before, but my internet is up and running strong, and I feel like there's little reason why I'd have any trouble getting back to that so here I am. Hopefully you guys will like this batch, and there will be more to come!

One of the loose ends at the end of the series is what happens with Kara in the future, as well as when and why she comes back. I came up with this idea for a variety of reasons, and hopefully we hit a lot of notes along the way. Enjoy!

* * *

Arriving in the future was not what Kara had expected it to be.

She thought that she could go there and start new, but would come to realize that her name was as famous as her cousin's and that everyone in the 31st century knew her. It was weird for her to see Kal-El's statue, to be asked about Lois Lane or the great Jimmy Olsen, though she was surprised when she learned they were speaking of the brother of the Jimmy she knew.

The biggest surprise was a being named Brainiac-5, or Brainy as everyone seemed to call him.

Upon seeing him, she jumped back and was ready to fight. Only after Rokk and Garth explained that he was a compilation of the particles that hadn't been corrupted by Zor-El or Zod could she lower her defenses.

"Come with me, I'll show you," offered Brainy.

They led her to a chamber with a small vile of black liquid within it. Brainy lifted it out of the display. "This is all that is left of the artificial intelligence that you knew as Brainiac. The particles themselves are virtually indestructible, so we have kept them within this vile to ensure that Brainiac never rises again to cause harm to the universe."

Kara nodded, "Brainiac was a horrible creature. I hope you are right and he never gets loose. He destroyed my home..."

Brainy put his hand on her shoulder, "You will make Earth your new home, Kara. The history books tell it."

She smiled warmly, and the two left the chamber. Garth and Rokk exchanged funny looks.

"I think Brainy has got a crush on somebody," laughed Garth in a sing-song voice.

Rokk gave him a sharp look and walked out of the room, yelling from the hall, "Quit acting like a Sub."

Garth flung his arms out, "What did I do?"

In his backswing, he smacked into the vile of the corrupted Brainiac particles.

When the vile hit the ground, the glass shattered and the particles spread across the floor. He scrambled to try and pick it up, but the particles took on a life of their own and raced away from his grip.

"Dammit! Brainy is going to kill me!"

The particles drip down a drain and end up in a parts storeroom. Slowly, the particles began to bond with bits and pieces in the storeroom. It all began to bundle together until a makeshift body was created for the particles to use as a host. The robotic form stomped towards the vat of nanites and dunked what could be most closely referred to as it's arm into the vat, the nanites quickly took over the robotic frame and formed a more elegant appearance.

After they spread over the frame, it took on the appearance of man with green skin and red diodes on it's head. A sly smile formed on it's face. "Rebooted and evolved to perfection...I believe we have a score to settle Kal-El," muttered Brainiac.

Realizing that he wasn't going to be able to get the particles back, Garth took off down the hall. He slid across the smooth floor, racing towards the common room to find Brainy. When he found him, he was sitting across from Kara, "Brainy!"

Brainy let out a sigh, "What is it, Lightning Lad?"

"I accidentally knocked over the vile of corrupted Brainiac-1 particles, they started to move like they were active!"

A serious look streaked across Brainy's face, "We need to find those particles."

They were sprinting down the hall towards where Garth knocked over the vile and last saw the particles when a loud alert sounded, "Alert. Unauthorized personnel have infiltrated the Time Displacement Chamber. Alert. Unauthorized personnel have infiltrated the Time Displacement Chamber."

Brainy stopped in his tracks, "It's created a mass. It's trying to time travel back to it's last known target."

"Who is that?" asked Garth.

Kara paled, "Kal-El..."

When they arrived at the Time Displacement Chamber, there was no sign of Brainiac anywhere. Brainy immediately checked the travel log, and found that the coordinates were set for 2011. "It's gone back to the year 2011."

"I have to go back," announced Kara.

Brainy turned towards her, "Superman should be able to handle it."

She gave him an apologetic look, "I'm sorry. I have to warn him. He's the only family that I have left."

"If you must..." he conceded.

Kara slipped her Legion Ring onto her finger and smiled at him, "I'll be back someday. I promise."

Before Brainy could respond, she was gone. He stood in silence for a long time while Garth tried to slip out of the room without being noticed. "Lightning Lad! I'm not done with you!" shouted Brainy.

_**in the present. . . .**_

Kara opened her eyes, and found herself nearly hit by an on-coming car. She flew up into the air, racing towards the Kent Farm in Smallville. As she approached, she saw a green mass streaking across the country side.

_**at the Kent Farm. . . .**_

"Come on, Lois!"

She looked at Clark in dismay, then turned back to Bart with her hands on her hips. "I'm not going to order tacos, pizza, chinese, _and_ then make pancakes on top of that!"

Bart groaned, "Why not?"

"Because the rest of us are not hobbits! That's why! Where do you put it all, Kid?"

He looked at Clark and then back to Lois, but before he could get a word out, they heard loud thrashing outside. They ran to the window, where all they could see was a blur of greed, red and blue with blonde hair whipping about.

They ran out to see what they could do, only to find Kara with her foot on Braniac's back when the dust settled.

"Wow."

Kara looked up at Bart with raised eyebrows, "What?"

Bart gave her a crooked smile. "I _must be_ the fastest man in the world, because I think I just fell in love."

Kara blushed profusely and tried to hide a smile, which caused Lois and Clark exchanged surprised looks. Lois couldn't help but let out a snort. "First the Man of Mush, now the Maiden of Mush. Seriously, what is it with your family, Smallville?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, how did that go for a '_how/when/why Kara came back to the present_' chapter? It was also my '_how Brainiac becomes a bad guy again_' and my '_how Bart met Kara_' chapter, so that was fun for me.

I know there were a few requests to see the Legion again, hopefully the appearances of Brainy, Rokk, and Garth will hold you over for a bit until I can whip something up that will have a bit more Legion-based. Anyways, hopefully this worked well and you guys liked it. Shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** _The Department of Entertainment and Arts._


	165. Entertainment and Arts

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided Cat/Clark, hints of Bara

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #165, The Department of Entertainment and Arts (for May 30th)

**Author's Note:** Just a quick up-front bit here, I know that "going to Hollywood" wasn't what changed Cat into the flirty, provocative character we know and love. It's the death of her son, Adam, at the hands of Toyman. I just didn't want to have those unfamiliar with the comics to think I murdered her son for the sake of a chapter, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Kara leaned against the window in her cousin-in-law's office with an exhausted look, draped in full Supergirl attire.

"I don't know how Clark deals with it, Lois. All those reporters want to talk to me, they almost get in the way of me actually doing my job. And that Cat Grant? She's the worst of them," she explained.

Lois gave her a comforting smile, "Cat's been on the rampage since she got back from Hollywood. I think that town changed her, she went from little miss butter cup to saucy cougar in the blink of an eye."

Kara let her head fall back against the glass, "I can't stand her constant questions about my love life."

This made Lois look up with a sly smile, "Love life?" Kara blushed. "You and...Bart? I knew it!"

Before Kara could respond, Cat Grant burst in the door.

"Lois, have you seen..." when she saw Supergirl, she grinned furiously. "Supergirl!"

She shared a look with Lois before forcing a smile, "Miss Grant."

"How about a scoop? Any news on the boy front? Are the rumors true about Kid Flash?"

Supergirl sighed, "I'm sorry, Miss Grant. I don't discuss my personal life."

Cat glared at Lois, "And if you did, you would be discussing it with Lois. That's what you mean, right?"

"You got a problem, Grant?"

She turned on Lois with a snarl, "Yeah, I do. Why do you get to be the Hero Whisperer, Lois? You've already got Superman and Green Arrow, and now you've got Supergirl too? Why can't the rest of us get in on the hero market?"

Lois shrugged, "Maybe you don't have the appeal to a superhero."

Cat's jaw dropped, "I don't...I don't have the appeal?"

Before she could explode in her face, Clark Kent walked past them. He was dropping papers and bumbling around as he tried to make his way to his office, still nodding and smiling at all that he passed. "Mr. Lombard...Mr. Troupe...Ms. Grant..."

A wicked grin began to twirl over her features, "I can prove that I've got appeal."

Lois frowned before realizing Cat's intentions, "With Clark? Yeah, good luck with that one."

The blonde spun on her toe and chased after the mild-manner reporter, whom had already entered his office. Kara turned to Lois with an odd expression, "Since when do you encourage women to hit on your husband?"

Lois shrugged and waved off her cousin-in-law's concerns . "Either he falls for it, and I get to kill him. Or he turns her down, which as satisfying as that would be on it's own, it gives me an excuse to drag him into the copy room for the hour I've already blocked off in my schedule to drag him into the copy room."

Kara chuckled, "You two are unbelievable."

Cat sauntered over to Clark, taking a seat on his desk. She leaned down with obvious intent. "Same old, Clark Kent. You were always a sweetie pie, I'm glad to see things haven't changed. It's big a long time."

"It has, Cat. I'm glad to see you back at the Planet," smiled Clark.

She grinned at him like he walked right into her web, "And you're still wearing those glasses, you should really think about getting Lasik. Surgery wonders for me, you know."

Clark frowned, "I didn't know you used to wear glasses."

Cat leaned down to give him a good angle to look down her shirt, not that he budged. "I didn't."

After a few moments, Cat looked down at her chest and then back up at Clark. With a huff, she leaned back up with a disappointed look etched across her face. "You're from another planet, you know that, Clark?"

Clark almost snickered as she stormed out of his office.

"That's what they tell me."

Lois and Supergirl smirked victoriously as they watched Cat stomp their way. Cat glared at Lois. "You know what, you can keep Clark all to yourself. He's no Superman, you know? I'm meant for bigger and better things."

"You know, it's strange," started Supergirl. Both Lois and Cat looked at her, Supergirl waved her finger over Cat's chest with an uncharacteristic smirk. "My x-ray vision is picking up some unusual plastics."

Cat scowled and stomped past them. Lois looked at Supergirl with a loving expression.

"I...am so proud right now," grinned Lois. "Even more than when you told Bart that if he didn't leave you at least a slice of pizza that you were going to kill him, and then when he did-"

Kara blushed, "And then we had to buy you a new bed for the guest room."

Lois grinned like a fiend, "It was like you two were a young me-and-Smallville."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I obviously used two of my favorite Cat Grant panels in this chapter so that things would be the right tone despite having a different origin for "_new_ Cat". Anyways, I just wanted to open up future chapters with Cougar Cat as opposed to Sweetheart Cat, and I thought this was a funny idea.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Steve Lombard_.


	166. Lombard

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Chimmy

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #166, Steve Lombard (May 31st)

**Author's Note: **Hope you guys like this one, it's a Jimmy Olsen centric chapter!

* * *

Jimmy fumbled with the box in his arms as he looked up at his _escort_. "Didn't you work for the Daily Star?"

"Uh..." a nervous look took of Steve's face, "The Slinger was uh...too much for the Star...so I'm back at the good ole Planet where a superstar can shine proper, you know what I mean, kid?"

The young photographer had no idea what he meant. "Sure, Mr. Lombard."

Steve nodded with a cocky grin, "Right. So, you're going to be-"

"Is Clark here? I mean Kent. I mean Clark Kent. And Lois Lane?"

"Uh...they are up on the eighth floor...and you're uh...you're down here in the basement. So uh...to answer your question...no. I don't think they are here," answered Steve. "Why you wanna hang out with Clarkie and Mad Dog anyways?"

Jimmy frowned at their nicknames, but shrugged all the same. "Family friends."

"Family friends?"

"Lois has a cousin named Chloe, who used to be married to my brother."

Steve nodded, "Divorce? I know how that goes, me and my three ex-wives never get along, I'll tell you man."

Jimmy looked at his feet for a few moments, "No, Mr. Lombard...actually...my brother is dead."

"Oh..." Steve felt guilty for powering through about himself. "I'm uh...I'm really sorry about that, kid."

Jimmy nodded.

After a moment of silence, Steve clapped his arm around Jimmy's shoulders. "Tell ya what? Why don't we cruise on up to the eighth floor and stop by and bug ole Clarkie and Mad Dog? Even give Trouper some trouble, what do ya say?"

Jimmy's face lit up, "Yeah?"

They hopped in the elevator and the next thing they knew, they were up on the eighth floor. Jimmy flinched as Perry White yelled from his office, screaming about what sounded like Little Cesar's Pizza or something through the glass.

'_His lunch must be running late_,' shrugged Jimmy.

Steve led Jimmy to the office that Lois and Clark shared on the eight floor, only to find that they were out. Steve went a couple doors down and peered around the corner, "Yo, Trouper?"

Ron Troupe looked up, an annoyed look on his face at the nickname, "What, Steve?"

"Where's the happy couple? They doing some killing or some kissing?"

"Lane went downtown for the LexCorp conference, looks like Luthor is buying out Southwestern Petroleum. Knowing his history, we're going to be filling up our cars at LexOil in the near future," answered Ron.

Steve grimaced. He wasn't a fan of Lex Luthor. "What about Clarkie?"

Ron shrugged, "Thought I seen him hiding out on the ninth floor, Grant was after him again."

Steve let out a guffaw, "We call her Mad Dog, but it's ole Clarkie on a leash. Kitty Cat is wasting her time, should have her eye on a fine young stud like myself," he puffed out his chest as he finished talking.

"Young?"

"Well...young-ish."

He leaned out of the office and saw Jimmy standing around awkwardly. Out in the distance, he saw Jeff Hage leaving the editor-in-chief's office. "Hey Jimbo, you see that guy over there?"

Jimmy turned to see Lois and Clark's old intern, "Jeff?"

"Yeah, the one with the stick up his butt? He's going to be working across the desk from you, why don't you get the rest of the tour from him. I'm going to torment Trouper for a while," he explained.

In the background, you could hear Ron groan.

Jimmy tore off after Jeff, finally catching up with him, Jeff gave him a sour look. "What do you want, Olsen?"

"Mr. Lombard told me that we're going to be working across from each other. I guess that makes us partners, and uh...I just wanted to catch up with you," offered Jimmy. Jeff just sighed.

"Alright, follow me."

They went down to the basement, and Jimmy got settled in at his desk. Jeff occupied Clark's old desk, while Jimmy got the desk that Lois and Cat used to occupy. Jeff started to get sick of watching Jimmy with his feet up on his desk, so he took back upstairs to try and pawn him off on someone else.

They had made it just in time to watch Clark heading out of Perry White's office with a stack of folders. Jimmy frowned a little bit as a thought came to the forefront of his mind. "Hey Jeff?"

"What is it, Olsen?" groaned Jeff.

"You ever notice that Clark kind of looks like Superman? You know, but with glasses and a bad haircut?"

Jeff rolled his eyes, "Rookies...Look, you aren't the first person to make that foolish observation. Plenty of people have thought just because Kent is a tall farmboy with _some_ muscles," he added tensely, "even though there are perfectly fit interns that get your coffee and your dry-cleaning and always make sure to always leave a maple doughnut for you-"

"Uh...Jeff?"

Looking up, Jeff swallowed, "Anyways, that's not the point, the point is that all you have to do is watch Clark Kent for five seconds and you're going to realize that you're an idiot for even suggesting it, Olsen."

Jimmy frowned, "Five seconds?"

Jeff let out a sigh and shook his head, "Watch."

They looked over to Clark carrying a large stack of folders ..._**1**_... he made his way around a cubicle ..._**2**_... narrowly missing Steve's football pass ..._**3**_... Clark turned and watched as the football hit the back of Ron's head ..._**4**_...

"I don't see any-" started Jimmy.

"Wait!" hissed Jeff.

..._**5**_... Clark turned back to where he was walking, slamming right into Cat Grant, sending her coffee into the air and onto both of their heads. Clark's folders went flying, paper scattered all the way down the aisle.

Cat let out a shriek, "Clark!"

"I'm really sorry, Cat, I wasn't-"

"I know what you weren't doing, Clark...just try and pay better attention next time, ok? It doesn't take Superman to watch where he's walking," she chided him like he was a little boy.

Jeff turned back to Jimmy with a smirk. "One day in the bullpen with Clark and you'll realize that there isn't anything about him that resembles the Man of Steel, Olsen. All they have in common is height...and _some_ muscles..."

Jimmy shrugged, "I guess you're right, Jeff. Clark just isn't Superman material."

And as Clark learned down to pick up his papers, he grinned as he heard Jimmy's words. '_Another one bites the dust..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I was in a heated debate with my Dad earlier today after I took him to watch _Green Lantern_ (which I really liked, btw) about Clark Kent's disguise and how it's ridiculous that an office filled with supposedly top-notch reporters can't tell he is Superman. I maintained that the glasses and the hair are just a part and it's his behavior that makes the real difference, so I wanted to write a chapter where we saw that used in full effect.

The fact that he is so bumbling and goofy is what really makes the difference to me, what about you guys? Anyways, off to the next chapter, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Not Sure_.


	167. Bat Cave

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Diana/Bruce, hints of Dollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #167, the Bat Cave (for June 1st, YAY! AT LEAST WE'VE MADE IT TO JUNE! haha)

**Author's Note:** Not much to say to set this one up, enjoy!

* * *

Lois dropped down onto the couch with a thud, "I don't know how Mrs. K raised a Kryptonian child."

Clark grinned, "Did you ever think that maybe she gets it all from you? You are a handful, Ms. Lane."

She looked at him with a death glare.

"You just got out of the kill zone, but not quite into the kiss zone...do you really want to go back to the kill zone?"

Before he could answer, Jo'an started to cry from upstairs. Lois rolled over and stuck her head between the couch cushions and began to mumble/yell something incoherent. Clark's face twisted up in a combination of pity and fear.

"How about I take her to go visit Bruce, and you can get some sleep?"

Her head popped out of the cushion with a _**pop**_ as she gazed lovingly at Clark. "That's more like it, Smallville." She walked past him, stopping to kiss him lovingly, "Now get the hell out of the house."

Clark let out a laugh, blurring upstairs and grabbing Jo'an. Lois looked at him lovingly.

"If I wasn't so tired...you'd so be getting lucky for this," she cooed.

_**Gotham. . . .**_

"Did I just hear Alfred talk in baby-speak?" asked Bruce.

Clark walked down the steps, "What can I say, it's those adorable Kent good looks."

Bruce didn't even look up from his files, "I think you mean those adorable Lane good lucks." After a second, Bruce turned around with a panicked look, "I didn't mean it like...wait, what is that thing on your chest?"

Clark looked down, "My daughter?"

Bruce rolled his eyes, "Not Jo'an, the thing that's holding Jo'an. What the hell is that?"

"It's a baby carrier-" Bruce let out a loud snort. "What? Chloe got it for us, and well, Lois is still a little hormonal and she thinks I'm going to drop the baby, so she wants me to carry her in the..."

He slowed his speech as Bruce keeled over with laughter. "...Hey! You know what? You remember the time that Diana made you wear the sweater around your shoulders? Do you remember that? Do ya?"

Bruce grimaced at the memory. Clark smirked victoriously.

"Yeah, me and Ollie _still_ laugh about that."

"Ok, ok, I'll shut up about it, ok? Just don't bring up the...oh god...just give me the kid," he groaned.

Bruce plucked Jo'an out of the baby carrier, "Hey there little Joey, how are you? How are you?" he asked in a baby voice.

He looked up at Clark, who was doing his best not to burst into laughter. Bruce growled, "Tell anyone, you die."

"Whatever you say, _Brucie_," he mocked in a baby voice.

Clark walked over to the desk and looked at the files thrown about, "So, what are you working on?"

Bruce let out a sigh, "You know, same old same."

"Joker?"

"Joker."

Clark sighed and turned back to the files, reading over what the Clown Prince of Crime had been up to this time.

"What was that?"

Clark looked up from the file, "What was what?"

Bruce looked terrified as he held Jo'an out at an arm's reach, "She just made a face."

"What kind of face?"

Bruce looked at him, "I don't know, it was something like this."

He twisted his face into a variety of expressions as Jo'an giggled at the faces her uncle was making. For a few moments, it looked like Clark had no idea what he was talking about. But then...then Clark's eyes got big.

"What? What is it?"

Clark gave Bruce a funny look, "I think she...she might have...she might need to be-"

"Shut up."

He looked at Bruce with a shocked face, "You were holding her. You probably made her do it."

Bruce's jaw dropped, "I didn't make her do anything. It's your kid, you do it!"

"You're her uncle!"

"But I'm not the Godfather, now _am_ I?" snapped Bruce.

Clark scrunched up his brow, "You and Oliver really need to be less competitive, you know that?"

Bruce rolled his eyes, "Well, why don't you just like...heat vision it off or something." Clark gave Bruce sharp look, causing him to throw his arms in the air. "What? She's _your_ kid, it's not like it's going to hurt."

Clark shook his head in disbelief, "I'm not going to heat vision my daughter, Bruce."

There was a moment of silence.

"What about-"

"I'm not going to use Arctic Breath her either!"

Bruce held up his hands in defeat, "Alright! Alright! Geeze, you try and help..."

"Hey guys, whats up?"

They looked up to see Oliver shuffling down the stairs and into the cave. "Ollie?"

"What are you doing here, Queen?"

Ollie looked up, "What? Can't you guys be happy to see me? I'm in town to see Dinah."

Suddenly, Clark's features curled into a smile. Bruce took one look, and knew exactly what he was thinking. Clark suddenly grabbed his ear and frowned, "I hear an emergency in Crime Alley, I've got it."

He took a few steps, "And a robbery in Metropolis. Bruce, you take Crime Alley. I'll head to Metropolis."

Clark immediately took off into the skies, ripping his shirt open to reveal his shield in the process.

"Well hey, I can help," offered Ollie.

Bruce hopped in the Batmobile, "You don't have your gear, but hey..." a smirk played on his lips as Oliver frowned, "...Jo'an needs a diaper change. Why don't you take care of that for us."

Oliver shielded himself form the gravel as Bruce peeled out, he looked over at his goddaughter with a smile. As he took her into his arms, his nose scrunched up. He could smell her diaper from there.

"Wait...dude...you guys suck!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I kind of came up with this idea on the run when I was thinking about writing a baby Jo'an story. It was pretty much just a "_Clark struggles with changing her diaper_" story and then I thought, why don't I add the Dark Knight and make for an insane diaper change, haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought! This is it for tonight, more tomorrow!

**Next Up:** Probably _Stiletto_, could be _Lady Fishnets_ though.


	168. Lady Fishnets

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Zatanna/Kyle

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #168, Lady Fishnets (for June 2nd)

**Author's Note: **This is a continuation of chapter #83 _Ben Hubbard_, so you might want to catch up with that one!

* * *

_Lois smiled up at him and kissed him deeply when Jo'an appeared again, "What's taking so long? Mom! Dad! Can't you kiss another night?"_

_The couple broke apart and looked at their daughter with smirks, "We better go, Smallville. Your daughter is going to kill us if she doesn't get her candy."_

_Jo'an rolled her eyes and raced off again towards the Daily Planet._

_As Clark readied himself and Lois for the journey, he laughed. "I don't know why you call her my daughter like that. It's a Lane thing to wanna kill the ones you love. I'm all about the kissing," he told her with wagging eyebrows and a Lois-trained smirk._

_Lois let out a laugh, "Well, if you want any kissing later, get your buns of steel to Metropolis. Pronto."_

_He rolled his eyes and prepared himself to jet into the sunset. 'She isn't getting out of kissing tonight. Not with that outfit."_

When they arrived at the carnival, Jo'an was buzzing from booth to booth. They watched as she grew excited about what was in front of her, only to notice another booth and zoom off. She turned to look at her parents with a goofy grin before noticing something off in the distance, causing her little eyes to grow big.

She took off past her parents, doing her best to keep her pace at a normal human level, but really it was more like an olympic sprinter level. But as she would often tell her parents, '_At least that's a human level!_'

Lois rolled her eyes, "That little monster..."

She grabbed Clark's arm and pulled her after their daughter. When they found her, she was dancing with a little boy made out of blue light. They looked over at the booth and saw their old friend Zatanna Zatara laughing.

"New trick, Zee?" laughed Lois.

Zatanna smirked, "Just a little something I constructed."

Clark frowned, "Construct...ed...I've seen that...I know that blue light..."

She paled as Clark smirked. Lois just looked confused.

"Why don't you come out and say hello, Kyle?"

Out from behind the curtain out walked Kyle Rayner, who looked up at Lois and Clark with a nervous grin as he started twitching with his Blue Lantern ring. "Oh...hey guys...didn't see ya there..."

Lois let her jaw drop as she looked between the two. "_Zee_? And _Kyle_? Well, that's a newsflash..."

"What can I say? I'm a sucker for magic, and what better than a man with a magic ring?"

Kyle frowned, "Hey, it's not a magic ring, it's powered by the emotional energy that is hope." Lois, Clark, and Zatanna each turned to give him a funny look. "...or we could just call it magic," he conceded.

Jo'an pulled on Kyle's sleeve with a wild grin, "I like magic."

"You do?" he asked, which Jo'an quickly nodded in reply. Kyle glanced around to see if anyone was watching before kneeling down next to her, "Well, let's see what you think of this!"

He made a little plane out of blue energy that flew circles around Jo'an, she danced with glee.

"I thought you needed a Green Lantern ring to power a Blue Lantern ring?" asked Clark.

"John is somewhere around here," explained Kyle. "I think he was going to grab some cotton candy."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Jewelry aside, when did this happen?"

Kyle shrugged, "Hal brought us to Watchtower to meet Tess and well, the fishnets kind of got my attention."

"Dinah wears fishnets. You didn't fall for her. Come on! I wanna hear some gushy details about our favorite Mistress of Magic!" whined Lois. "You do realize that this is an even bigger deal than when Bruce settled down, right?"

Zatanna let out a laugh, "Who said anything about settling down?" Kyle turned and gave her a wild look. "I didn't mean it like that," she comforted. "Aren't you making kind of a big deal about this, Lo?"

Lois looked at Clark wildly and then back at Zatanna, "A big deal? I'm not making a big deal. You're making a big deal."

"She is just freaking out because she couldn't set you up on her own," explained Clark.

His wife spun around with a death glare, "Kiss or kill, Smallville?"

He gulped.

"I mean...you such a playa, Zee," he said in a weird voice.

The three of them now turned on Clark with quirked eyebrows, Clark nodded, "Yeah, that was weird."

Kyle laughed and turned back to Jo'an and made more constructs that made her dance with excitement. Lois frowned as she noticed Clark's pout as Kyle showed off his ring to Jo'an, "Hey, what's up with you, Smallville?"

Clark straightened up, "Nothing."

She grinned, "Come on, what's got you in a fuss?"

He rolled his eyes and muttered, "I'm still...I mean I know Barry is a great hero and all...I just thought if you wanted to give someone that provoked _hope_ in people the ring...I just...I don't know...I would've thought that they'd pick me."

Lois formed an amused smirk as she shook her head at her husband. "Smallville...if you want a ring that badly, I've got a whole jewelry box full of 'em back at the Farm." Clark groaned, but Lois just continued.

"Oh! I've got a sparkley one that'll look adorable with your cape!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? That whole Barry as the Blue Lantern thing is a reference to when Barry Allen became a Blue Lantern during Blackest Night and a lot of the fans were upset and thought that it should have been Superman because he is all about the hope factor. Now, Superman was a Black Lantern at the time, so this really doesn't make any sense anyways, but I thought it was funny, so I kept it in there, haha.

And I also know that Kyle is no longer a Blue Lantern, but in an effort to spread some light over the other Corps, I decided to have him still be a part of the Blue Lantern Corps for this chapter and I'm planning on trying to work in the other Corps in future chapters, but it might be tough. Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Probably _Stiletto_, could be _LexCorp_ or maybe _Metropolis_.


	169. Letter to my Readers

Heya Folks!

Well, I made a promise to a special someone that I would post something, so here I am. I've been wanting to come back for a long time now, but have been a bit worried about my ability to stick around. At first, it was some stuff going on in my personal life that kept me away. Then I got caught up in this insane work schedule, long story short, I've been covering about three people's shifts for the last two months. That's pretty much meant that on a six-to seven day basis, I wake up, I go to work, I come home, I fall asleep within fifteen to twenty minutes, haha.

So, you can probably see that my time has been very limited. I have been writing still. I find free-time here and there to jot down ideas. I haven't posted because, well, I've been scared that if I come back that I'll disappear again. It really kind of became almost a writer's block situation. I love you guys, and I love writing these stories. I can't even begin to tell you how much I've missed all of your reviews and responses to my stories. I especially miss those of you that I've built a friendship with over the last 168 chapters.

Anyways, I felt like I needed to let you guys know whats been up with me. The good news is that work is slowing down. I run a seasonal business, and while I'll still have work to do, it won't be nearly as hectic in the winter. That means I have time for writing. Also, the special someone mentioned above, has been on my butt to write more, so I have been doing a lot of writing lately, haha. Now, I can't promise a chapter everyday. But I'm going to try and get back to that.

I know some of you are anxious for more _Kiss Me or Kill Me?_ chapters, and those are at the top of my list to do. Honestly, I love that whole dynamic, haha. I especially love the built in timeline that we've got, it's a lot of fun to weave the chapters in and out of the show and the previous chapters, haha. But, I might fulfill my quota through my previously mentioned _Young Justice/Teen Titans_ story here and there. There might also be some one-shots, but I suspect the bulk will come with _Kiss Me or Kill Me?_, just wanted to throw that out there.

Anyways, lets go ahead and get to the next chapter. I hope you guys like it! Thanks for coming back!

Matt, aka CaptainTightpants12.


	170. Clark Kent's Tour of the Galaxy

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12, with some help from the lovely LoisClarkNLove

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents, mentions of Clana

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #170, Clark Kent's Tour of the Galaxy

**Author's Note: **Takes place during Season 9's _Disciple_, with the flashback sometime after Season 4's _Krypto_. There's also a little joke that ought to connect with Chapter 100's _Grandpa Kent._

* * *

"See? That party wasn't so bad."

Clark gave her the ole '_uhuh_' look and led her out towards the road.

"Plus, all the money from the bar goes to charity, so somewhere a kid is getting new shoes because I drank a cran-tini," she told him with a grin.

He had to smile at that. Leave it to Lois to use her logic as such. "Actually, there's a few kids getting shoes compliments of Lois Lane. Not that I was keeping track," he teased.

"Hey mister, that was two hours and five cups ago," she told him before admitting what he wanted to hear. "And ok, I was just a little nervous. It was our first public outing as, kind of like, a couple."

"Emphasis on _kind of_," he replied in an unusually snippy tone. "You wouldn't even let me help you with your coat."

Clark jammed his hands into his pockets, looking away with a slightly hurt look on his faceas Lois tried to come up with something to comeback with to soothe her boyfriend. "I held your hand?"

He smirked, "Only when you were taking orderves out of it."

Lois rolled her eyes with a smile, '_my Smallville never misses a beat._'

"Tess seemed ok when she found out her top basement reporters were dating. Although not everyone was doing the happy dance when they saw us together... Ollie didn't have much to say, he left right after we got there," she mused.

Clark interrupted. "Oliver's gotten over bigger hurdles in his life than his friends dating."

She stopped by her car and shrugged. "Well, it is a lot to get your head around. Clark Kent and Lois Lane? Who knew?"

Clark smiled at first, but then he found himself looking at her face and thinking. Had he known? '_I must have. Didn't I?_' he thought for a second. Surely he had known all along. Right?

_"Dad!"_

_Jonathan laughed, "Clark, I'm just saying that-"_

_"Dad!"_

_"Jonathan," chuckled Martha._

_Clark walked around in circles with his hands against his ears, trying to block out his super-hearing. Jonathan looked at Martha with a teasing smile. "I'm just saying that he sure spends a lot of time with Lois, that's all."_

_"Dad! She's annoying. And rude. And she never, ever, ever, shuts up. She's always on my case. We can't stand each other! We would never...I would never...Oh god...Dad, I can't believe you would..." rambled off Clark._

_Clark stomped off to his room while Jonathan gazed out at Lois playing fetch with Shelby. Lois claimed she only played fetch in hopes that she'd throw far enough that Shelby would get lost and never come back home, she often muttered that she wished she could throw Clark's plaid in a similar fashion, but Jonathan knew better._

_"Someday, Clark is going to see Lois in a different way," he mused._

_Martha rolled her eyes with a small smile. "You know that Clark only has eyes for Lana, dear."_

_Jonathan turned around. "I think you underestimate how much the Kent men like our women to challenge us, just as likely to kick our butt as they are to give us a kiss," he winked._

_"Oh dear," she laughed._

_"Care to make a wager, Mrs. Kent?" he teased and wrapped his arms around from behind._

_Martha turned to give him a sly smile. "Cherry cobler?"_

_Jonathan almost purred. Almost._

_Upstairs, Clark was pacing. Now that he was upstairs and alone, he could actually entertain the thought. Not that he was going to. But he did. But not really. Because...he didn't actually like Lois...he just...tolerated her. Mhmm. Didn't like her at all. Even though he did like the way his room smelt...but it didn't have anything to do with Lois. Or her perfume. Or her ridiculously tall pile of laundry that had formed over four days since her last load of laundry._

_Sure...he kind of liked their banter. Kind of. But not really. Because...well...it wasn't like he...looked forward to it or anything. And sure...she wasn't always so bad to talk to. Or look at. Not that he looked at her. He didn't...he didn't. He may have gotten a peak...or two...or several...but that's just because they lived together._

_Before he could think about much more, Lois burst in the door and was in the process of pulling her shirt off. She had been covered in mud. By the time that her head got through the shirt hole, she saw Clark. Who saw...everything._

_"Smallville! What the hell are you doing in my room?"_

_He moved his mouth, but no sound came out. Lois tried to pull her shirt down, but was failing. "It's my room!"_

_"Not when I'm here! Get out, you perv!"_

_She spun a circle around him, he tripped over her clothes, she fell onto him...shirtless._

_As Jonathan and Martha raced pace their bedroom, hand-in-hand towards their own, they had to walk back. They watched as the two teenagers struggled to get to their feet, Lois had her arms trapped over her head while Clark was trying desperately not to touch anything. Jonathan shot Martha a look. "Does it count?"_

_Martha rolled her eyes. "That's more killing than kissing."_

_Both Lois and Clark look up in horror, "What? We would never!"_

But now, looking into her eyes. He knew he had known. He had known all along. Every little annoyance. Every banter. Every time he needed her, she had been there. Just as he had been there for her. They were Lois and Clark, and they went together like Hot Fudge and Halibut. And looking at her in that dress, she was most definitely the Hot Fudge.

So, with her question still hanging in the air, he knew exactly what to say.

"I did." And as she smiled back, radiant as ever, he grew more confident. "You know, Lois...we could go back to the Farm and take a walk? I can give you Clark Kent's Tour of the Galaxy."

Lois had to turn around to keep from turning bright red, so she pretended to fiddle with her keys. "Smallville...the only planet you know about is the one that you read at the breakfast tabl-"

He captured her lips with a kiss. The kiss he'd been holding in the entire night. The same kiss that was just like all the other kisses he shared with Lois that left him tingling all over. The only kiss he wanted for the rest of his life.

"Ok, that was PDA number four on date number five."

Clark frowned.

"I'm just keeping track!" she blurted out. "I'm trying not to rush into this _relationship_ like I've done before."

He offered up a notion to try for PDA number five on date number five. "Lois, there isn't anything we'll be doing in five weeks that we can't do tonight."

"I know...it's just...this is the one. You're the one I wanna get it right with, ok?"

Clark couldn't help but smile. Because while he was standing there thinking about how this was the only woman he wanted to kiss for the rest of his life, or as he referred to it '_until Lois kills me'_, Lois was doing the same.

_Who knew?_

* * *

**Author's Note: **Uhhhh, we did? hahaha. So, how was that? I had been wanting to do something with that particular scene for a long time. I knew I wanted to put a Jonathan/Clark flashback during Clark's pause, but I hadn't come up with anything but then this just kind of flew together. I hope you guys liked it.

Alright, I can't wait to see who comes back and what you guys think! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** the long awaited, _Stiletto_.


	171. Stiletto

**Review Comments: **You have no idea how good it feels to write your names right now, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Mhmm, haha. Me too. Of course he is! haha. Jonathan knows whats up, hahaha. I'm glad that it was good enough for you, haha. Here is _Stiletto_ like you've been hounding me! haha.

**_alexindigo_** - *tries to look innocent* Mhmm, haha. I promise that you'll get your M chapter soon enough, haha. It will actually come as a two-parter with the second being the "M Alternative Version" so that there will be a tamer version for those that would rather forgo the steamier scenes. I haven't forgotten! haha.

It was tough to say the least. It gets even tougher everyday when I see what is going on with _Man of Steel_, I have not been impressed with what I've seen. At least Erica Durance will be back with _Saving Hope_!

_**jade2nightwing**_ - It's good to be back! I'm glad you liked it!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - You are one of the few that hasn't sent me a PM over the last couple months, haha. I was starting to think that you didn't love me anymore, haha. But it feels great to be back.

We were just joking around about an upcoming chapter that features time travel, and I was saying, "what if Clark tells his younger self to start wearing glasses to shore up the plot-hole that EVERYONE should recognize Superman as Clark?" and one of the other thoughts I had was to have Lois like scare off Lana or something, hahaha. None of that will probably end up in the chapter, but we thought it would be funny, hahaha.

Trust me, I plan to do a prequel and a sequel to that chapter where we see Tess react to Clois and then for Lois to cash in on that tour, haha. Well, wait no longer, here she is! I hope that you like it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I think I can promise at the very least once a week, haha. It all really comes down to what's going on at work. If I'm free, then I will find time to write. Anyways, I'm glad to be back and I'm glad that you liked it!

**_Mpj891_** - Aww, you are far too sweet! haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**Lilbit4**_ - I've missed all of you too! haha. I'm glad that it was up to par!

**_NeverSayNever95_** - I'm glad that I could make the scene more enjoyable for you! Ideally, when I do the scenes that have been on the show, the goal is to add something new to the scene, so that's great to hear!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #171, Stiletto

**Author's Note:** So, this was an idea that popped into my head way back when, and I thought you guys would like it, haha. I'm sure it won't be the last we see of Stiletto, haha. Too many possibilities with that get-up, hahaha. Enjoy!

* * *

Lois laid down on the bed with a huff.

Clark peered out of the closet with a frown. "What's up?"

"That little control freak monster down there says I'm not allowed to go downstairs."

He frowned, "Why not?"

Lois turned her head. "She said she was making me a present for tonight. I swear, if she sets the kitchen on fire again-"

"Wasn't that you when you were trying to bake cookies?"

She glared. "The point is that this house cannot take another fire, not after you set the living room on fire last month."

Clark's jaw dropped. "I came home to find you wearing whipped cream. _Only_...whipped cream, Lois."

"I wanted to surprise you," she mumbled innocently.

"Uhuh," he chuckled.

Clark leaned down on the bed next to her, tantalizingly hovering his lips over hers for a few moments. Finally, he leaned back to give her a saucy smile. "Well, _I_ have a very special surprise for you tonight..."

"Oh, do you now?" she giggled.

"And I think that you are going to like it-"..._kiss_..."-very-"..._kiss_..."-very-"..._kiss_..."-much," he finished with yet another kiss.

Lois smiled up at him happy, "Well then, Mr. Kent, it sounds like you've got quite the night planned for me."

He grinned and walked towards the door, giving her a wink before heading out the door.

She sat up on the bed, grinning like a fiend in anticipation. With a bounce, she hopped up and walked towards the closet. She moved things around while contemplating what to wear. '_I did hear him talking to Mrs. K about stopping by...maybe she's going to take Jo'an for the night and we're going to get to have some much needed all-over-the-farm-fun..._' she mused.

The light shined off the leather get-up on the final hanger, and she couldn't help but grin with glee.

"Oh, Clarkie...You're in for it so bad," she purred...in a british accent.

_**later that night. . . .**_

"Lois! Honey! Your surprise is ready!"

She grinned like a fiend, running her hands over her outfit. She slipped out of the bedroom and sauntered down the hall with a sexy smile plastered to her face. "Oh, Smallville, wait until you see what I've got for-"

Lois froze at the top of the stairs, looking at all the faces looking back up at her in pure shock.

"Oh..."

Her daughter groaned, "Mom! What did I tell you about the _hankey pankey_?"

"...my..."

Bruce and Oliver keeled over laughing, "Hey, Clark? What's your stance on skintight leather?"

"...god."

Martha tried her best not to laugh as Lois spun and raced back towards the bedroom, even the General had to chuckle. The group turned to Clark, whom was red in the face in embarrassment. "Uh...I'm gunna...I'm gunna...I'm gunna talk to Lois...for a minute."

He was halfway up the stairs when he had to turn and glare at Oliver after he chimed in with, "I bet you are."

"I really am going to talk to her!"

Clark slowly opened the door to their bedroom, carefully looking out for a flying lamp or possibly a spinning kick. Instead, he saw Lois pacing back and worth on her side of the bed. Still wearing her Stiletto outfit...

'_Man she really wears that suit-_'

"You," she muttered as she turned around.

Clark's lips curled into a small smile, '_Yeah, me...wait...that's kill me voice, not kiss me voice..._'

"Me?" he squeaked.

"You said I was going to like your surprise _very_ much!"

Clark made a expression that could be only described as half-laugh/half-shock. "I meant family time! You know, those people that were down here? The people that love you? Mom? The General? Your daughter?"

Lois rolled her eyes and threw her arms in the air, "We were talking about the whipped cream incident, and I just thought...well, you know...I thought you were talking about some of the-"

"I know."

"With the-"

"I know."

"And when you-"

"Lois! I know."

She started to pace again. "And you kissed me! You kissed me like fifteen times-"

"It was more like four-"

"What's a girl supposed to think when you do something like that! I just flashed my leather clad ass to our entire family, and oh my god! Mrs. K saw that!" Lois jammed her face into her hands, "She's going to make you divorce me now..."

She tailed off and started to mumble to herself, sitting down on the bed with her head in her hands.

Clark sat down next to her with a chuckle. "My mom isn't going to make me divorce you, Lois. In fact, I'm pretty sure she loves you even more than she loves me," Lois looked up with a quirked eyebrow.

"Yeah?"

Clark grinned. "And I love you even more than that."

Lois gave him a sideways, goofy smile. "Oh, Smallville..."

Impatiently waiting, Jo'an tapped her foot against the ground. Kara tried to entertain Mrs. K and the General, while Conner was telling Bruce and Oliver about his recent run-in with King Shark.

All of a sudden, Jo'an heard something.

She frowned as she heard a creak above her, a few giggles picked up in her super-hearing as her eyes got big. She looked across the room at Conner and Kara, both of whom featured the same expression.

In unison, they shouted: "We have to get everyone out of the house..._now_!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** How was that? haha. I just remember having this idea in my head about Lois getting caught by everyone in her Stiletto outfit, and this is what it turned into. It was also really nice to get to bring Jo'an back, though I have to admit, the Jo'an parts have been done for a while, but it was still great to have her back so early in my comeback.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Its either '_the Death of Superman: Part 1_' or '_Black K'_. You guys vote and let me know! haha.


	172. Black K

**Review Comments:**

**_Katlynne_ **- *nods* Yes, _hounding_. Of course, he is! haha. He is becoming Castle in his older age, hahaha.

_**Jas-El**_ - Thanks, it feels good to be writing again. Since the vote went to _Black-K_, we'll do that first. But the first part of _the Death of Superman_ will be next, and it will be at least a five part story, so hopefully you'll dig it!

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - She may very well be pregnant after that one, hahaha. That's a brilliant idea, I might have to write a chapter where the trio has to explain to Martha and the General _why_ they had to evacuate the building, hahaha. Umm, I think you might find this to one to be different, but I don't think it will disappoint you either, haha.

_**Lovelybutterfly17**_ - I'm glad that you've been able to enjoy them! It's always been a goal of mine to keep the chapters in line with the show, try and cover stuff from the comics that hadn't been done on the show, while keeping the chapters all in one continuity. Obviously, that's impossible considering I started during Season 10, or was it before Season 10? I can't remember, haha. Either way, I've tried to keep them all their own continuity and nice and connected, so I'm glad you like that aspect of the story! haha.

There will be a happy ending at the very end, but I'm afraid that there will be a journey to get there, haha. I'm going to try and post a fluffy chapter with each of the _TDOS_ parts to ease the sadness a little bit, haha.

**_Mpj891_** - Your wish is my command, haha. Though _TDOS_ will be the next chapter, but I promise to do it with a fluffy chapter so that it's not such a downer. I too am a little sad about the new movie from what I've seen and read. I have very low expectations. Haven't read any of the reboot yet, I'm planning on picking up a few copies soon though.

I'm not sure what to expect. I've heard pretty good reviews about some of them. I'm a big Geoff Johns fan, so I will at least give the Justice League series a try. Probably a couple of the Batman and Superman series too.

_**alexindigo**_ - Everybody loves Joey, don't they? haha. Ummm, I'm not sure! haha. I can tell you that one of the many ideas for the M chapter is a Bluretto chapter? haha. Is that enough to keep your hunger at bay? hahaha.

I was semi-content with Anne Hathaway until the most recent pictures, and I gotta tell ya, I'm expecting the Dark Knight Rises to completely suck. Bane looks like a hobo, haha. Sounds like an old man. They are even doing the Batwing? Really, Nolan? The Batwing? haha. I guess if he figures you can't top Dark Knight, why try? haha.

Don't even get me started on Man of Steel though, haha. There are so many brain-washed Nolanites and Cavill fanboys that they are completely supporting this thing no matter how bad it looks. I mean, there is actually a rumor going around that Clark _won't_ be wearing glasses. That just makes me sick to my stomach, but they are completely fine. I don't get it!

_Message to WB:_ Cancel Man of Steel and give Erica Durance and Tom Welling a chance to do it right.

_**RPadavan2**_ - Just got completely caught up in work, it was insanity for a while there, haha. I'm just so glad that everyone has come back and been so great about it. I'm glad you liked them!

_**Lilbit4**_ - Well, hopefully I don't disappoint! Thanks!

_**Kinnari3**_ - I'm glad that I could improve upon an already stellar scene for you! And I'm very pleased to hear that you enjoyed _Stiletto_! haha. Hopefully this will be up to the mark!

_**NessieBell**_ - I'm glad that you like them! When you love these characters as much as I do, it makes it a lot easier to connect with them. I'm glad that you like them though, one of the things that I wanted to work on when I first started this story was keeping characters and storylines consistent! So thanks!

Don't get banned! haha. You are going to need your library access before the semester is up! haha. Thanks!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Well, I'm glad that you were tempted, haha. You must like my story then, hahaha. I will have to see what I can do for that time-travel story, haha. I definitely have some ideas for the scenes that I think that would go over well with us Clois-ers, haha. I don't know! hahaha. You'll have to wait and see! haha.

Yeah, poor Jo'an, haha. That super-hearing will be both a blessing and a curse for the young lady, hahaha. Well, the vote fell in _Black-K_'s favor, so that's coming up here, though TDOS will be next. And pre-warning on the Black-K, it might not be Clark who ends up getting infected, hahahaha. _Hint Hint! _Enjoy, haha!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with the assistance of the lovely LoisClarkNLove.

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #172, Black Kryptonite

**Author's Note: **Sorry this is coming a little late. I had planned to give you guys a few days to vote before I posted the next chapter anyways, but I meant to have this up yesterday, I just got a little sidetracked with work. Anyways, this was the hardest of the kryptonites to come up with a story for, but I think you'll like it, haha.

* * *

There was something about the Fortress that made Lois feel... _mischievous_.

She couldn't quite put her finger on it. Maybe it was the fact that it was supposed to be Clark's Fortress of Solitude, yet she had complete access to it. Maybe it was the fact that Clark no longer allowed Oliver and Bruce to drop by whenever they pleased, and she felt giddy knowing she had something that they didn't.

'_I wonder what they did to make Clark change the codes..._' she mused.

Completing her self-tour of the Armory, Lois found herself in the Kryptonian Artifacts room. Pretty much all that was left in the universe of Clark's birth planet was in this room. Inside, one could find the Bottled City of Kandor.

Kara had recently found the city when she had followed an escaped Brainiac back to his infamous Skull Ship, Clark was still in the process of trying to enlarged back to it's original size. One could also find Clark's extensive kryptonite collection.

Lois peered down to look at a little black rock. "It doesn't seem so scary...I wonder what it does..."

_**later that day. . . .**_

Clark pushed through the door, an overflowing suitcase and a bouquet of flowers wedged under his chin.

"Lois, I'm home!" When no sound came, he frowned. And then he smelt... "Fire?"

Instinctively, Clark raced into the kitchen, but he certainly didn't find fire. Well, there was smoke. But his attention was mostly on Lois. And her butt. That was in the air. Because her head was in the oven.

"Lois? Honey, are you ok? What's going on?"

She popped her head out of the oven with just a trace of soot on her nose. "Hey, Sugar Bear. Just making a pie!" Lois noticed the frown etched across Clark's forehead. "What's wrong snookums?"

Clark's head tilted slightly, "snook-_what_?"

Lois walked up and cradled his face in her hands, pecking him lightly. "You look worried."

He looked away for a second, '_what in the world..._', he turned back. "Did you buy chocolate from a fairy again?"

"What?"

Clark shook his head, "Nevermind."

The phone began to ring as Lois started to ramble in most chirpy, un-Lois-y tone about how she wanted to make her big strong man a pie to show him how much she loved him.

Clark reached for the phone without taking his uber-wide eyes off her.

"Just...just don't...just be careful, honey...You know the oven isn't your strong suit..." He realized he had the phone up to his ear and had yet to answer, he turned away and plugged one ear with his finger "Hello? Is anyone, hello?"

"Clark?"

He frowned, "Chloe?"

"Clark, you need to get here fast...I can't...I can't handle her any longer."

If possible, his frown deepened. "Handle who, Chloe?"

"Lois!"

Clark slowly turned his head to see Lois at the corner fussing with her pie. "What do you mean..._Lois_?"

Chloe growled into the phone, "She is over here, in _some_ kind of get-up I might add, giving me marriage advice..."

Before he could reply, he could hear what sounded like his wife's voice in the background.

"I'm just saying, if he wants to play Robin Hood? Show him where he can stick his _arrow_, Chlo!"

"Come get her, Clark."

"But Chloe-"

"_Now_, Clark," she growled into the phone.

Clark gulped, "I'll be there in a minute."

Hanging up the phone, Clark looked at Lois will careful eyes. She was singing a little song to herself about her pie and he couldn't imagine anything more terrifying...and he would have dwelled on that if he didn't find her outfit so-

'_No time to think about that now, Kent!_' he berated himself.

He slowly walked towards her, "Lois? Honey, Sweetie? I have to go see Chloe for a little bit, ok?"

Lois looked at him with a big ole grin and even bigger eyes. "Whatever you need to do, Cuddle Muffin," she cooed. "Just make sure to bring your sweet buns home soon, your pie is almost done!"

Clark nodded...horrified. "Ok, dear. I'll be back soon."

He quickly scrambled out of the kitchen and flew off into the sky towards Star City. Lois watched with a sigh, licking a bit of cherry topping off the tip of her finger. "You better, or I'll have to come find you," she chirped.

Arriving in Star City, Clark burst through the door to see a _very_ scantily clad Lois Lane.

"Chlo?" The blonde looked at Lois questioningly. "Get me a glass..." she eyed Clark hungrily, "...for this tall drink of water standing in front of me." Lois ran her tongue over her lips and quirked an eyebrow.

Behind Clark, there was laughing. All eyes turned on Oliver standing with groceries.

"This is so the greatest moment of my life." Clark glared at him, Oliver gave him a '_what?_' face. "What? I'm married now. I've got to enjoy the little things." On the other side of the room, Chloe coughed.

Ollie turned towards her. "I mean...I love you?" he whipped his head back to Clark and mouthed, '_See!_'

All of a sudden, the door flew open behind them and in shuffled Lois in her house-wife get up carrying a pie.

"Clarkie Poo! I brought pie!" she cheered in a sing-song voice.

Oliver threw his bed back with a laugh, "Holy crap, this just keeps getting better."

Chloe just squeaked, "Wha..?"

"Lois!"

"What?"

"Not _you_, Lois," he turned to the scantily clad Lois Lane standing in the living room. He turned back to the house-wife Lois Lane standing in the doorway. "Honey, how did you get all the way to Star City?"

House-Wife Lois stepped aside and Bart Allen fell face first onto the ground in exhaustion. "Dude, I just carried your old lady all the way from Smallville... You owe me like fifty tacos, _pronto_."

"I called our good friend, Bartholomew."

Oliver dropped the groceries in laughter, "_Bartholomew_?"

"Dude! You didn't hear that!"

**_to be continued in 'Black-K Part 2'. . . ._**

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. It was supposed to be one chapter, but I didn't realize how long it was until I copy-and-pasted it into my Doc Manager, so i decide to split it into two chapters instead, haha. And given the opportunity to now go back and look at it, we'll see how Scantily-Clad Lois got there, hahaha.

I read a quote from Erica Durance where she said she's actually pretty shy, and when she does photo shoots and stuff where she gets all sexy, she has a side that she calls Gillian. Well, that made this idea pop in my head, and here we are, haha. I hope you guys liked it. Katlynne helped me fill it out, so show her some love too, haha.

**Next Up:** '_the Death of Superman: Part 1'_, but it'll be posted with '_Sick Day'_ so it's not a total downer update!


	173. TDOS Pt 1

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I already have an idea for how to bring on the two Clarks for Lois, haha. I'm sure that we will see that all unfold soon enough, haha. I promise that we'll see that story too! haha.

**_Mpj891_** - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**silverin100**_ - As if the normal Lois wasn't crazy enough, huh? hahaha.

_**Whatever-the-weather**_ - Will do! haha.

**_Katlynne_** - Chloe is almost a Lane! haha. She can be scary too! haha. He is so Castle! hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Yeah, ever since she said that, I've been toying around with different ideas in my head, haha. I'm sure that we will see at least a few of those ideas come along at one point or another since I thought I'd have more than just Clark get infected similarly to how I had Bruce and Ollie at the center of Silver-K, haha.

Well, I loved Dark Knight, but it was far from perfect as far as being completely faithful to Batman goes. I'm not a fan of the suit either. I'm big on the idea that Martha made the suit, and that's why it's a little silly to begin with and why it looks the way that it looks. Very similarly to (and I don't know if your parents/grandparents ever made you halloween costumes when you were a kid) when my grandma made me halloween costumes and they always looked a little silly and she would always say, "that's how they are supposed to look, I'm telling you!" haha. That's my Super-Undies excuse, hahaha.

I was sad to hear it, but I think that Lois and Clark will find each other soon enough. I can't imagine that they will be apart for long. They just want to attract new readers, and the Clois story will always be a big one to sell comics for.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - Yeah, I know that it's going to be a hard thing for some of you guys. The story is on the dark side, but it's one of those things that have to be covered, right? haha. All I can say is that I'll post fluffy stuff with them so that it's a little easier to tough out, haha. And in the end, all will be right in the world of Clois, haha.

Personally, I wouldn't cry too many tears over two Lois Lanes either, hahaha. I'm glad you liked the twist! I thought it would be fun to go outside the box like I did with having Bruce and Ollie get infected with Silver-K, haha.

_**lo-conrad**_ - Then I suggest you keep reading, especially my _Diana_ (#22) and _Wonder Woman_ (#60) chapters, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #173, the Death of Superman: Part 1

**Author's Note: **Not going to be a whole lot of comedy in these parts, kind of obvious why, haha. This is part one of at least five, and I'll be posting them every few chapters to avoid having like five back-to-back serious/sad chapters that will bum everyone out, haha. Nobody wants to see Lois without Clark for that long, haha

Anyways, I hope that you guys like these! I'll be posting them separately as well for those who don't read this story.

* * *

The tires slipped across the pools of water collecting along the streets of Metropolis. Jimmy had one hand against the ceiling and the other against the dash, trying to brace himself as Lois whipped the Daily Planet news van around a corner.

"Ms. Lane! I just got a text from Mr. Lombard, he says the last sighting was Metro-Square!"

Lois slammed her foot on the brake, spinning the van down a road to the right. Jimmy's eyes grew wide as they saw the destruction only getting worse and worse as they raced towards Metro-Square. "What if he can't stop it?"

"Don't even say that, Olsen."

"But Ms. Lane-"

"No," she snapped. Lois looked him dead in the face. "He'll stop it, Jimmy. He'll stop it."

Jimmy watched Lois wipe a tear from her eye and focus on the road again. He had never seen her so upset. He had never seen her so scared. He turned to look up the road ahead. Through the smoke and clouds of dust, he could see red. He tried to narrow his eyes to see what it was, when the smoke cleared, he whispered, "Oh no..."

Superman's cape was wrapped around a piece of metal that was sticking out of the ground.

The van stopped with a screech and the two listened for the sound of the fight, but there was none. They got out of the van and walked towards the rubble that was Metro-Square. As smoke and dust cleared, they saw the creature known as Doomsday slumped against a boulder. From what they could tell, it was dead.

"If it's dead, where is-" started Jimmy.

Lois held up her hand, she could hear something. She followed the sound into the rubble and smoke. Jimmy tagged along behind her, but they wouldn't have to go far to find what was making the sound.

Superman, horribly beaten and bloody, was trying to crawl out of a crater. Lois turned to Jimmy, "Get an ambulance! Go to the street, direct them down here!" she ordered as she crawled down towards Superman.

Jimmy stood there for a second in shock before turning to do just that.

"Oh god...Clark..." she whispered. "Clark!"

He was barely moving. Lois slid own the rubble, grabbing onto him like he was going to disappear. "Clark! Can you hear me? Please god, Clark..."

An eye squinted open, "Lo...is?"

"I'm here, Smallville. I'm here. Just hold on, Jimmy is getting help. Just hold on."

"Doomsday...is it...is it..."

Lois cradled him in her arms, tears streaming down her face. "You stopped it. You saved us, Clark. You saved us. Now just relax, try and hold onto me, Smallville. You're going to be ok. Help is coming."

Clark's fingers tightened around her arm, "Lois...I don't think...I don't think I'll be able to..."

"Don't talk like that. Please, don't talk like that. Please..."

"Lois..."

She buried her face in his chest, tears pouring out. "I can't do this without you, Clark. I can't lose you."

"It's going to be ok, Lois," he told her in a drifty voice, rubbing the back of her head. Enjoying the feel of her hair between his fingers. "Oliver and Bruce...they'll take care...of things..."

She started to sob, "I don't care about that. I can't do this without you..."

Clark's hand reached up to her cheek. "You will be ok, Lois...I believe in you..."

"No...Smallville..."

"And when you believe...in somebody...it's not for a minute...or just for now..."

Lois couldn't help but smile through the free-falling tears. "It's forever."

"I love...you...Lois Lane."

As his body went limp, Lois cried into his chest. "Kent. It's...it's always been Kent..."

Rocks slid down around them, but Lois didn't notice. She was clinging onto Clark's body, sobbing into his chest. Jimmy slid down into the crater, "They're coming! I can see their lights, Ms. Lane! We just have...to hold..."

Realization set in for Jimmy as Lois looked up at him, eyes red and tears streaming down her face.

"Oh no..."

**_to be continued. . . ._**

* * *

**Author's Note:** Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it was sad, but how was it besides that? haha. I wanted to cover this arc, it's an obvious one to do since I've already posted the ending of it, haha. Plus, it's going to have some of the story progression for some of the other characters in the upcoming parts that lead to the future that we've seen.

You will also note that there wasn't a kiss-or-kill moment, which was kind of hard to imagine sliding into this one, haha. I do have a line for it in most of the upcoming parts, so lets look at it as one big chapter in that sense. This kind of spring boards into the parts that I wanted to cover, which are the people in Clark's life and how they react to it all.

Anyways, I'm sure some of you are going to wanna kill me, but I promise that _Sick Day_ is nice and funny to get you out of the downer funk that I've put you in! haha. Shoot me a review! haha.

**Next Up:** _Sick Day_.


	174. Sick Day

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #174, Sick Day

**Author's Note:** A certain somebody wasn't feeling so good, so I came up with this idea. Enjoy!

* * *

"Get her out of here."

Clark opened his mouth to respond, but Perry beat him to it. "Now, Kent. She's growling at the other reporters like one of those damn Gremlins. She almost took Olsen's head off with her tape recorder."

They looked at Jimmy, who wore a large band-aid across his forehead. "Well, it _was_ the last maple doughnut."

Before they could speak, they could hear Lois rampaging through the bullpen. "If you throw that football past my head one more time, Lombard, I'm going to take it and shove it up your-"

"Kent!"

Clark gave him a pained look. "She's sick! Besides, she isn't going to just let me take her home, Mr. White. What am I supposed to do? Throw a rope around her and drag her out of the bullpen by her feet?"

Perry gave him an unamused look, "I believe that Cliff has some rope in the janitorial closet."

Sighing, Clark made his way out of his editor's office and back out to the bullpen. It didn't take more than a millisecond to find his wife. She was in the middle of the bullpen, resisting the urge to strangle Cat Grant.

"-and if I ever see you jamming another mayonnaise cookie down my husbands throat again, I'm going to-"

"Lois."

She whipped around wildly, wiping away some snot with her sleeve, "What, Smallville?"

Clark eyed her sleeve with a grimace, "I think we need to go home. I don't think you are feeling-"

"What I'm feeling is a mighty great desire to smack this bimbo into next week!" she snapped.

Cat's jaw dropped. "Who do you think you're calling a bimbo?"

Lois pushed her red nose into Cat's face, "Who do you think, dye job?"

Before Cat could launch herself at Lois, Clark scooped Lois up and threw her over his shoulder. He would pay for it later in a million little ways, but he had to get Lois out of the office before someone got killed.

"Don't let this undermine the ass kicking you've got coming, Grant!" she hollered from over Clark's shoulder like a crazy person. The crowed watched as they stepped in the elevator. "I know that you stole my lunch last week!"

Lombard coughed as the doors closed, "Uh...that was me...yeah...my bad..."

**_at the Kent Farm. . . ._**

"No!"

Clark's head dropped against the bed. He mumbled his pleas against the mattress, which caused them to come out incoherent, not that it mattered what he said. Lois crossed her arms in determination. "Not happening."

"I have to go out on patrol, Lois."

"Then go!"

He groaned, "You have to let-"

"No! I'm not letting that little monster take care of me. She is a control freak!"

Clark had to bite back a '_just like her mother_' grumble. Lois noticed, so she decided to give him a half point in her mental to-be-kissed column for when she wasn't sick. His to-be-killed column was overloaded for his stunt at the Planet.

"Do you want me to call Oliver?"

Lois looked at him in shock. "I will not have anyone from the League see me with eye boogers, Clark Kent!" He dropped his head against the bed again, Lois groaned. "I can take care of myself, Smallville!"

"Just let Jo'an take care of you!"

Almost on cue, Jo'an appeared in their doorway wearing a lab-coat, a stethoscope, and holding a rectal thermometer in her head with a freakish grin. Lois grabbed Clark by the collar, "She sticks me, I stick you."

Clark turned to Jo'an with half an eye roll, "Put away the thermometer."

"But Dad! Uncle Emil always has one of these in his pockets! It's a doctor thing!"

"Jo'an..."

She turned on her heel, stomping all the way back to her room. Lois breathed a sigh of relief. Clark flinched as he heard the floorboards crack under his daughter's feet. '_Her mother's temper, her father's powers, I'm going to have to build a new house by the time she goes off to college_,' he mused with an exhausted expression.

"Just let her look after you. I promise that I'll be home soon," he promised.

Lois pouted.

"That's not going to work, Lois."

She pouted harder.

"Lois..."

More pouting.

"I'll have Mom make you some homemade soup..."

Lois, at speeds that would have made Bart jealous, spun around in the blankets to create a cocoon of warm as she settled into their bed. "Me and the Kid will be fine for a few hours. Now go."

Clark couldn't help but laugh, "I thought that might do the trick."

He gave her a kiss on the forehead and tucked her in. He closed the door carefully, hoping that she would drift off and take a nap for a while. When he turned, he saw his daughter walking towards him with a sinister grin.

"Jo'an! Where did you find a defibrillator?"

"Gah, Dad! It's only for just-in-case!"

Inside the bedroom, Lois Lane's eyes popped open in fear.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, what did you guys think? hahaha. Originally, there was a lot more of Jo'an taking care of Lois, but it ended up like this as I was writing it. I think there are enough left over ideas to create a whole chapter for that though, so have no fear! haha. We will get to see how Jo'an takes care of her mom, haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review for this and _the Death of Superman: Part 1_! I hope you liked them!

**Next Up: **Me thinks that it will be '_Good Morning, Metropolis!_'


	175. Good Morning, Metropolis!

**Review Comments:**

_**RPadavan2**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! haha. And yes, I promise that with each of the TDOS chapters, we will have a fluffy and/or funny chapter to go along with it, like this one for instance! haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - There isn't much that Erica can't pull off, haha. She's pretty much just flat out amazing. And yeah, I'd be hard pressed to imagine a world where I wouldn't take Erica in a heartbeat, haha.

I'm sure that she was happy about seeing him be all manly, haha. As for the second child, it's kind of an interesting issue for me. When I wrote in that part, I thought that I'd be ending way, way, way, way sooner than obviously I have, haha. I never really planned to go into much more detail. And every time I try and write a baby chapter, I find myself somehow shaping it for Jo'an. It's like a mental thing, haha. I'm sure that we'll have a few chapters though! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, haha. Well, it _was_ the last maple doughnut, haha. He should know better! haha. I thought you would like that, haha. Reminds me of someone, hahaha. I'm glad you liked this one too! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Yeah, I wanted to post it separately because I figured that people might want to read it but don't want to read 170+ chapters to get to it, haha. I'm sure that looks a little daunting for new readers, haha. I'm not a huge Bale fan to be honest, but he does just fine considering the part he is playing.

And with the Martha making the suit notion, I had big problems with the Superman Returns suit and now the Man of Steel suit. Martha is an amazing woman, but I'm not sure she could make those suits, haha. That's why if I ever get to make a Superman movie, it won't be very different than the Christopher Reeve suit. That's the kind of suit that I can see Martha making. Though I would probably use a \S/ with the curl and the same blue as the Returns suit, haha.

Lois and Jo'an are so fun to write together. I really want to write more scenes with just the two of them. I also want to start exploring Clark's relationship with Jo'an, so there might be some more family oriented chapters coming up.

_**Mpj891**_ - Lois is completely oblivious to it, hahaha. I hope you like what I did with the Morning Show! This isn't really as in-depth into the show as you might be thinking, but there will be more in the future!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm glad that you liked it! I was really worried that it would be just too sad, but how can Clark's death be anything but super sad? haha. There will be some more hurt coming up, but it will pay off in the end, haha. I promise that there will be a happy ending, especially for Clois and at least one other couple, haha. _Wink_.

You have mentioned having kids before, so I figured that you would enjoy that! haha. And yes, little Jo'an will always be a very unique experience for one Lois Lane, and I love those little moments between them! haha.

_**Leli1013**_ - She is something, isn't she? hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #175, Good Morning, Metropolis!

**Author's Note: **I think what this one is about is probably pretty obvious, haha.

* * *

Clark watched as Lois rambled on about her audition with _Good Morning, Metropolis!_ with Chloe.

He wasn't sure why she even wanted to audition. '_I mean, Lois is an amazing reporter. Even if reporter jobs shrink up around the world, Lois Lane would be a welcome addition to any masthead..._'

"I just wish I had someone to practice with. Someone to help me..." Lois hinted towards Chloe.

Chloe shook her head with a laugh, "I'm not going there, Cuz. Sorry."

Lois groaned. "Who in the world is going to-"

"I'll do it."

All eyes turned on Clark. Lois narrowed her eyes, "What do you mean...you'll do it?"

Chloe did everything she could not to laugh. Clark shot her a death glare, but Chloe just rolled her eyes with a giggle. He looked back at a shell-shocked Lois and swallowed. "I'll help you. I'll...I'll audition with you."

"You...want to be on daytime television?" she asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"If you're going to do it...," he paused as he attempted to reassure himself, "...then yes."

Lois ran her tongue across her K-9, giving him a disbelieving smirk. Deep down though, Lois could feel her stomach doing little somersaults. "And if I wanted to jump off a bridge? Would you want to do that too, Smallville?"

Clark matched her smirk. "Name the time and bridge."

She let out a small laugh and shook her head, her cheeks hurt from smiling so hard. After a few moments of thought, she pointed her finger at him threateningly. "Fine. You can help me audition. But don't think this going to get you back in my good graces, I still haven't forgiven you for the debacle with Ollie," she warned and walked out.

He watched her stroll out with a sly smile. "Yes, Ms. Lane."

Chloe rolled her eyes, "Do you have a death wish?"

**_a few years later. . . ._**

"You remember the last time we were here?"

Lois snorted. "You were trying to bat your eyes at me so that I'd take you back."

Clark chuckled to himself. "Actually, I was referring to your futile attempts to resist the Kent Charm."

"Dream on, Smallville. Just try not to forget your lines this time," she teased.

He rolled his eyes, "I just can't believe they remembered us."

"Are you kidding me? Lois and Clark? On TV? It's got epic written all over it," she told him. "I mean, come on, if we had our own TV show, I bet it would run for like ten seasons! It'd be so awesome."

Dena, the show's producer, was grinning like a fiend. Of course she had remembered them. She saw their chemistry day one and had fully intended to put them on the air full-time. She had been just as surprised as Lois and Clark when her boss called to tell her that they were planning to go with Clark's date.

When they needed a sub-host, she knew just who to call.

The people wanted excitement, and that was a perfect way to describe Lois Lane and Clark Kent. You didn't know whether they were going to fight tot he death or kiss each other senseless.

"Clark?" He looked up at Dena, she gave him an apologetic look. "Do you think maybe we could...lose the glasses?"

"No!" shouted Lois.

Both Dena and Clark turned to look at her in shock. Lois smiled shyly. "Uh, Smallville's uh... he's as blind as a bat. So, uh, yeah, he wouldn't even be able to read the teleprompter without them."

"Oh, well, do you have contacts?" she asked hopefully.

Lois and Clark shared a look as he tried to make up an excuse, "I don't...I don't actually have contacts."

Dena smiled, "Don't worry about it, what's your prescription? We can call them a production expense."

"Oh...uh...well...I uh..."

"Clark is allergic."

She frowned at Lois, "Allergic?"

Even Clark was giving her the '_that is the best that you could do?_' face.

"Yeah," started Lois with a nervous tone. "Clark's eyes get all red and puffy whenever he wears contacts, it's the weirdest thing. He pretty much looks like a girl after she's just watched _the Notebook_."

Death. Glare.

"Oh, well...I guess they are ok then. They do look kind of cute, in a nerdy sort of way," smiled Dena.

Clark shot her a shy smile, "Thanks."

As Dena left the set, Clark shot Lois another death glare. "Really? _The Notebook_?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "Would you rather me tell her you cried at the end of _the Lion King_?"

He shot her a dirty look before mumbling, "...he finally got to be king."

Lois face-palmed.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well? haha. What did you think? haha. This was another one of those chapters where a lot of little ideas came together as one chapter. I had the glasses bit, the 'how did Clark get sucked into auditioning' bit, and the bit about Lois and Clark having their own TV Show as separate ideas in my notes. Somehow, they all fit together, haha.

I have an idea for who Lois and Clark interview for the show, so this won't be the last we see of _Good Morning, Metropolis!_ for those that might be wondering, haha. Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'll let you vote again, so here are the options: _August 17th_, _Metropolis_, or _Wild Coyote_.


	176. Wild Coyote

**Review Comments:**

_**Lilbit4**_ - Is anyone else writing Jo'an? haha. I wish I could take credit, but it's all mygyps17, I'm just lucky to get to write her! haha. I'm glad that you are enjoy all of this! And I'm sure that DC will bring Lois and Clark back together. They can't be that dumb, this has to be just to create some drama early on. Clois will always find their way together!

**_Tonyahuqt03_** - I'm glad you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Looking at it now, you are totally right. I should have put in a little joke there, haha.

**_IrishUnicorn_** - As long as I'm writing him, hopefully he never does! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Always! haha. I'm not sure that Lois would admit it now! hahaha. This isn't the plan, but you just gave me the funniest idea of having Oliver sub in for Clark so that Superman can be on the show, hahahaha. Oh boy, I might have to change it just to make that happen! haha. Lex is certainly a top choice as well! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - I too would have loved to see a series of episodes where Clark was groveling and jumping through hoops all while Lois had already secretly forgiven him, haha. We have had this conversation before, but my choice for Batman is always in flux, haha. If I'm writing a new cross-over franchise ala the Avengers with Tom Welling as Superman, then I would cast Matt Bomer as Batman with Kevin Conroy dubbing his voice as Batman with a "voice changer" in a similar fashion to Smallville's Green Arrow. Between Bomer's suave role on White Collar and his bad ass-ness on Chuck, plus that jaw in the cowl? haha. He is totally my choice for Batman right now.

And yes, thank you, if I make a Superman movie, he will have the classic suit and will deflect jokes with "Hey, my Mom made me this suit" all day long to explain why it's a little silly looking. You give me the Reeve suit, with a darker blue but the same reds and yellows, with the curled \S/ from the comics, I'll give you a true Superman suit.

No Jealous Clark in this one, well, maybe in a twisted way, hahaha, but I promise I'll write one soon!

**_Mpj891_** - I'm glad that you liked it! And yes, Part 2 should come pretty soon!

_**NessieBell**_ - You know, I've written action on here before, but at some point, you're really just kind of writing "Clark punched him. Then Doomsday punched him. Then Clark punched him. Then Doomsday punched him." haha. I figured that we all can imagine the actual fight, lets get into the heart break.

The Doomsday line is straight out of the comics, but I figured that Clark would be thinking about who will pick up the slack when he is gone like he was when he was going to leave with the Kandorians. Well, that was the idea! hahaha. I wanted to use the vows there, I figured it would really hit home, so the tears mean I did it right! haha.

Lois is pretty territorial over his maple doughnuts, haha. I _love_ writing Perry! I suspect we'll see a lot more Daily Planet central chapters coming up. I miss writing Perry and Jimmy, but I really want to get Lombard and Cat and Troupe more involved going forward as well. I'm glad you weren't either! haha. I don't want you to get banned! hahaha.

_**10thDoctorRose4ever**_ - I noticed that some of the readers liked similar lines in the past, so I threw it in there, haha. i'm glad that you liked it!

_**Katlynne**_ - Mhmm, you, haha.

She's pretty lovable, haha. Now I'm going to be stuck thinking about Jenna everytime I write Chloe! hahaha. Don't even get me started, only ten? You must be losing your touch, hahahaha.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I figured we could use some fluff after the TDOS chapter, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**cathy03**_ - Seriously? I disappeared for how long? hahaha. You don't have to apologize to this guy! hahaha. Well, you know how I love to write Jonathan! haha. You just inspired a chapter! haha.

You know, I think I need to bring Dinah back, haha. I haven't shown her enough love lately. Yeah, it has been a really long time, I'm starting to wonder if she's ever going to update, haha. Not that I have room to talk! haha. I'm working on Part 2, it won't be much longer, haha.

It's going to be the same as what I post here, it'll just be streamlined there to see what non-KM-or-KM readers think. I think I lose a lot of new readers because this story is almost 200 chapters, hahaha. Probably looks a little daunting for those that don't realize that it's not one streamlined story, but a ton of one-shots that connect together.

Mhmm, they're both a handful, haha. There will be more! I promise! haha. Couldn't have said it better myself! haha.

_**brodieresa**_ - Well, I'm back, and I'm glad that you liked it! Here's another new chapter! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #176, the Wild Coyote

**Author's Note:** This was the option that got the most votes, so here it is. But on a side-note, most of you have mentioned wanting this chapter, haha. So then, you wanted it. You got it, haha.

Read it to find out what the heck I'm talking about, haha.

* * *

Exiting the bathroom in what she deemed suitable underwear in case Clark decided to get frisky later that night, '_and lets face it, Smallville's gunna want some of this_,' she mused, Lois saw her daughter waiting impatiently on the bed.

"Your father send you to hurry me along?"

"No, _I_ came to hurry you along. My tummy is grumbling!" moaned Jo'an.

Lois rolled her eyes, "You've been hanging out with Bozo too much lately…"

Jo'an was not amused by her mother's comment about her beloved Bobo. "I don't know why you gotta get all dressed up anyways, Mom…Jeans are nice, Dad's always staring at your jeans anyways…and your dresses...and your shorts...and your pajamas..."

A satisfied smirk formed on her mother's face, quickly replaced with a sharp look back at Jo'an. "Forgive me if I don't take my fashion advice from the girl who inherited her father's unruly hair and yet refuses to run a brush through it."

It was the younger Lane-Kent's turn to roll her eyes. But when she turned back to look at her mother bent over and rummaging through her closest, she frowned. "Uh...hey Mom?"

"What is it, Munchkin?"

Jo'an hesitated, "…whats that on your butt?"

Lois froze.

**_years earlier. . . ._**

Clark dropped his head on the table with a thud.

Lois held onto him for support. "He was so embarrassed! He couldn't sit down for the entire day!"

He grumbled incoherently into the table, causing Lois to laugh even harder.

"I swear, digging up that Gold-K was the best thing that's ever happened ever," cried Oliver. "I can't...I can't breathe!"

Tess shook her head, holding up her hand. "No! No! _Blue_-K was the best thing that's ever happened ever!"

Both Kara and Clark raised their drinks, "Hear! Hear!"

The whole group hoisted their drinks into the air, cheering before taking long swigs. Nights like these were few and far between for them, but that only caused them to enjoy them so much more when they had the chance. It wasn't much later until last call and Jack, the Bartender, was coming up to their table.

"Hey guys, we're going to be closing up soon, so uh..."

Oliver waved his hand. "Hold on there, Kind Sir," he told him in a horribly done british accent that made Tess giggle with glee. Ollie pulled out his checkbook, scribbled here and there, and handed a blank check to Jack.

"Uh...what's this for?" he asked.

"I just bought the bar."

Jack laughed, "What?"

"Look, Clark Kent is drunk-"

Clark interrupted with a slur, "I'm not drunk!"

Oliver ignored him. "Do you know how rare that is? Do you know how much that is worth?"

"A bar?"

He grinned. "Yes. Yes it is. Now, why don't you take the rest of the night off? What do you say, Jack?"

Jack nodded with a chuckle, "If you say so, Boss."

He spun on his heel to leave the group to their drinks, leaving them as the last remaining patrons of the bar. Oliver turned and grinned at the rest of the table, "He called me Boss."

"Oh shut it, Ollie. Everybody knows that I'm the boss," snarked Lois with a smirk.

Clark snorted, causing everyone at the table to suck in a breath of anticipation. Tess shook with excitement.

"And what is that supposed to mean, Smallville?"

He made a goofy face, "I'm just saying...you're not the boss of me, Ms. Lane."

Oliver did a happy dance, squealing to himself, "It's starting!"

Lois chuckled slowly at Clark. "There is a tattoo on your _ass_ that says otherwise."

Kara decided to poke the bear a little bit. "Maybe Lois should get a Superman tattoo to even it up."

"Oh! I like that!" shouted Lois. Most of the people at the table frowned. "Well, not for _that_ reason, I so am the Boss. But I am also Superman's number one fan," she sang with a little dance.

Clark, surprisingly, did not seem as on board with this as Lois did.

"No, nope, nuh-uh."

Lois whined, "But Clark!"

He shook his head wildly, then immediately regretted it as he lost balance. "Everybody at work already talks about how you're going to leave me for Superman," he explained in a drunken-slur.

Oliver frowned, "But you are Superman."

Clark spun his head towards his best friend, "I know that!" He spun back to look at Lois, who was leaning back against Tess for support. "If anyone sees a Superman tattoo, it's game over."

He kept wagging his hand in the air to illustrate that it was game over. It didn't make sense. To anyone.

Oliver stood up and started to pull Clark out of his seat.

"Come on, Big Fella," he grunted as he pulled Clark's arm over his shoulder. "Lets get you home before your wife realizes that you just forbid her from doing something and she turns _drunken-monkey-sex_ into _crazy-grave-digging_."

They were already out the door before Lois realized just that. "Hey! You can't tell me what-"

"Lois, they're gone."

"Oh." She twisted her face up in determination. "I _am_ getting that tattoo."

Tess gave her a tired look, "We are in Smallville, Lane. Where do you plan on getting a tattoo?"

Kara dropped her beer bottle onto the table with a _clang_.

"I'll do it."

Lois turned to her with an excited smile, "Really?"

Kara nodded. "Clark showed Bart the picture of me with the Santa's beard on from a couple Christmases ago. I've been looking for a way to get him back ever since, seems as good as anything I've come up with."

Tess gave her a careful look, "What have you come up with?"

"I tried to tie his shoes together, but they broke and he just kept walking," she explained with a sigh.

The other two exchanged looks, Lois broke into a fit of giggles.

"Uh...yeah, this is probably going to be better," offered Tess.

"Mhmm, so where do ya want it?" asked Kara.

Lois looked up, her brow furrow in deep thought before smirking devilishly. "I have an idea..." she said mischievously. '_But if I get it there, I can't wear my Bunny outfit for work anymore...then again...my Elmer has been a vewy bad wabbit_.'

She nodded again slowly, "Yeah, I definitely know the spot."

About five minutes later, Lois was bent over the table with her pants around her ankles, screaming at Tess while Kara stumbled around in the background. It was a sight to see to say the least.

"Hold my hand!"

Tess latched onto her hand, not realizing that Lois had a thunder grip. '_No wonder she can drag Clark around..._'

"Hold still!" laughed Kara, "I'm a little tipsy! My aim isn't exactly at 100% here!"

Lois gritted her teeth, "I have a very bad idea about- OH MY GOD! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!"

**_back in the present. . . ._**

"What did Dad say when he saw it?"

Lois snorted. '_Like Smallville could ever be upset if I didn't have pants on... Oh crap, she's looking at me... Uh..._'

"Lets just say that your father wasn't in a the mood to be angry with me," she offered.

Jo'an grimaced, "Ewww, you mean the _Hanky Panky_, don't you?"

Lois threw her head back with a groan. Jo'an was halfway out the door, fingers in ears and humming, when she stopped and turned around to give her mother a look. "Wait, is this the same night that Dad got arrested?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. Sorry it took so long for this to get posted. I was planning on giving you guys a few days like last time, but right around the time that I was planning to finish up the chapter, I got caught up with my brother coming to visit and then some work stuff. Anyways, I hope you liked it!

I added that last line at the last minute because during this chapter, I was thinking, "What happens with Drunk Ollie and Clark?" and thought that since we didn't get to see them together all that much during Fortune, it'd be fun to write a chapter where Ollie and Clark get into mischief together, haha. So obviously, it will tie in with this chapter, haha.

Anyways, shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** It will be either _August 17th_ or _Metropolis_ with Part II of _the Death of Superman_.


	177. TDOS Pt 2

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - Mhmm, haha. Every drunk person says it at one point in the night, haha. I think he loves watching Lois kick Clark's butt because he can never kick Clark's butt, hahaha. Don't we all? hahaha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Aww, i'm glad you like how I write them! Yes, if I ever got the chance to do a Superman movie, it would be in the prime of his career when he is already with Lois right off the bat. We know the origin, let's move on.

Hahahahaha, oh dear. I love Armie Hammer, just a bigger Bomer fan because of Chuck and White Collar, haha. I miss her too, did you watch her on Charlie's Angels? She rocked so hard she made the "Angels" look like crap, hahaha, that's the real reason they canceled the show! They couldn't live up to Erica's awesomeness! haha.

I"m glad that you liked it! haha. And of course we'll have that story! haha. I have to write that story! haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I try to keep you guys hungry for more! hahaha. Well, here is Part 2, which I think will likely be the last of the '_potential-tear-jerker_' chapters, though not the last sad-ish chapter.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad you liked it! haha. I can't wait to post that chapter to hear what you all think! haha.

**_Mpj891_** - Well, you might always say it, but I definitely always love hearing it! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It is very possible! haha. I love writing Ollie so much, I can just think of the horrible jokes he could tell, hahaha. Oh no, not the puppy dog eyes! haha. My lips are sealed! It's supposed to be a surprise! hahaha.

I'm glad that it was worth the wait! haha. As soon as I wrote about Clark getting a tattoo on his butt, I knew that I had to do the same to Lois, haha. It's all about being fair, haha. I really need to get Tess more involved, but for some reason, she never comes to mind while I'm writing! I'm going to make a bigger effort to include her more.

Oh, we shall elaborate, hahaha. All in good time! hahaha.

**_10thDoctorRose4Ever_** - Tom Welling was so funny in that episode, I can't wait to write Part 2! hahaha.

_**Lilbit4**_ - Well, thank you so much! I like to think that if you can make the characters feel real and three dimensional, it will only make the story better, so I try to make them with lots of heart! I think Jo'an might be everyone's favorite, haha, she's just a little firecracker, haha. Well, I am very flattered, I hope you like these next two chapters!

Oh, and I got your PM, and I'm working on it now. It's called _the Birds and the Bees_!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Bruce/Diana, Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #177, the Death of Superman: Part 2

**Author's Note: **I'm sorry this took so long to get up, guys! I was uber-busy with work, and then I became obsessed with Arkham City, haha. Anyways, I'm here now, and I hope you guys like this one!

* * *

She sprinted past Alfred...she didn't have time to exchange the pleasantries...

So many people had called her.

Barry had called...Arthur...J'onn had told her telepathically what had happened. But she wasn't ready to believe any of them... She wasn't going to believe anything until she heard it from _him_.

She jumped down the stairs to the Cave, she knew every step and every crook like the back of her hand. She wasn't going to stop until she got to him. She wasn't going to stop until she got to him and he told her the truth.

"_It has now been confirmed, Superman was pronounced dead at the scene...the nation is in mourning_."

Diana saw him sitting in his chair, watching the news on the Bat-Computer. It stopped her dead.

He was silent.

"Bruce? Is it...is it true?" He didn't answer. "Bruce! I'm talking to you!"

"We're going to need to build the League stronger next time..." he answered, his voice cracking.

Tears welled up in her eyes. "Bruce..."

She had never heard the weakness in his voice that she just heard. She had never seen or heard him be anything but the strongest man she knew, at heart. But then...then she remembered all that he had told her...all that Alfred had told her... She remembered how bad he was with death...but for once...Bruce wasn't in denial.

She could see his shoulders shaking from there.

_It was true._

Diana ran to him, wrapping her arms around his torso. Bruce let the sobs take his body over.

"Why... Why did we let him die alone... Why was he alone, Diana?" asked Bruce, tears falling.

She had never seen him like this. _Never_.

"Wasn't that the whole point of this? That we wouldn't have to face things alone? That we'd be there for each other when we needed them the most? But not Clark. We let him die in the middle of the street...alone. We let him die and I can't figure out why. I can't...he was my best friend...and I wasn't there..." whispered Bruce, his head hanging.

Diana spun his chair and knelt down in front of him, lifting his head. "I'm so sorry..."

"Why-"

"Clark never would have put us in harms way like that... he knew what he was facing... he knew that it was pure evil... he cared too much to ask us, to put us in the middle of that," she cried. "He died to protect us..."

Bruce trembled, "I would have helped him-"

"I know. I know you would have. We all would have," she told him, cupping his cheek. He leaned his face just slightly into her touch, Diana rubbed her thumb over his cheek bone.

"What are we going to do?"

Diana looked away for a second, shaking her head. "We'll be strong," she said, turning back to look him in the eye. "We'll be strong for the League. We'll be strong for the world, Bruce."

They shared a long look. Each other daring to say what the other one was thinking.

Bruce slowly lifted his hand to cup her cheek, and just as he mimicked her motion, she leaned into his touch just as he had done to hers. As he leaned down towards her lips, he whispered, "We'll be strong for each other."

Alfred watched them for a moment from the stairs as their lips met.

'_Dark and dangerous days are ahead of us,_' he considered as he turned from the Cave. '_But maybe, despite all the pain and wreckage of Master Clark's death, something good may still come. Master Bruce always said that Master Clark could rise above all the darkness the world could offer because he had a light inside of him. Because of Miss Lois._

_Maybe, just maybe, Master Bruce can find that light inside of himself as well. Because of Miss Diana. Maybe, they will be able to see the good left in this world. And that it's worth fighting for. Together._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? Like I had said before, this was going to cover multiple characters and this time around we see Bruce and Diana's reaction to Clark's death. There was a great panel from the comics that was used for the bulk of the inspiration, but I've always fancied a scene between Bruce and Diana like this.

This has long been one of my "_how it happened_" ideas. Hope you guys liked it! The next chapter is going to have Lois, Lex, and a few other characters that haven't appeared in the TDOS story yet, and it'll be less sad, so there's that!

**Next Up:** _Brainiac's Skull-Ship, _I know I said_ August 17th _or_ Metropolis_ before, but I explain why it's not in the next one.


	178. Brainac's Skull Ship

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hints of Bara

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #178, Brainiac's Skull-Ship

**Author's Note: **Well, here is the upper for that downer, haha. Hopefully you guys still love me enough to keep reading after it, haha. Anyways, this one takes place just after #164's '_the Future_', I hope you guys like it!

* * *

"Seriously, Kid?"

Bart made a shocked face. "What? You're going to blame this on me?"

Lois stared at Clark, "Tell him."

Clark gave Bart a sad look to let him know he was being forced to say the following. "You _were_ on guard duty..."

"Dude! I stepped away for like, half a second to grab me some tacos for my hungry belly!" he whined. "The dude was a bucket of bolts after Kara went all Kung-Fu Panda on his butt-"

Kara frowned, "I don't know what that means."

"-How was I supposed to know that he was going to go all Terminator 2 and get away?"

She frowned more. "Termin- what? I don't understand what he is trying to say."

Lois matched her frown, "Ok, I can let you slide on Kung-Fu Panda, but you haven't seen Terminator 2?"

"No..."

"You suck at pretending to be a human, you know that? That movie is culturally significant!"

It was Clark's turn to frown now, "I haven't seen it either."

Lois turned to him in shock, then she turned back to Kara and Bart. "Ok, you two have fun with your little hunt for the Jolly Green Giant, but me and Smallville have other matters to attend to."

"But Brainiac-"

"No," she said in a matter-of-fact tone. "You're coming home and watching Terminator 2. Just because you play a nerd at work, doesn't mean you have to be one in real life. Got it?"

Bart chuckled, "Terminator is about robots from the future, it doesn't get any nerdier-" her death glare cut him off, "-you should go watch that movie, Stretch. I think it won the Academy Award...for like awesomeness...or something."

Lois gave him a '_you're-off-the-hook-...for-now_' look before turning back to Clark.

"Lets go. Kara can handle Brainiac."

Clark made a face, "But-"

"March, Smallville."

He turned on his foot and marched, causing Bart to break into laughter as soon as the couple was gone.

"Ok, her kisses can not be worth being _that_ whipped. I woulda picked death," he quipped.

Kara frowned at him. "You're weird."

Bart grinned with confidence, "It's all part of my charm."

She gave him a skeptical look, "I have to go now."

"Wait! Aren't you going to take me with you? I mean, I think Lois kind of made us partners..."

"And I'm listening to Lois...why?"

Bart snorted, "Seriously?"

Kara rolled her eyes, "If you're going to come, then we'll have to acquire a spaceship."

He frowned, "Why?"

"Because we'll be flying through space. The tracer shows him heading towards Colu. I'm sure that his Skull-Ship is somewhere near there, he'll be going to recover from our fight and plan his next move."

"Uh, well, can't I just fly with you? That's usually what I do with Clark."

Kara tilted her head, "Unless you can breathe in space, that would be a very bad idea."

Bart had an embarrassing moment of realization. "Right...forgot about that..."

**_halfway to Colu. . . ._**

"Hey Kara?"

She didn't look up from the monitor, instead offering a simple "Hmm?" in response.

"Does Bruce know that we took his spaceship?"

Kara shrugged, "He asked me is my skirt was inappropriately short."

Bart's eyebrows shot up, "No comments about the custume. Got it."

"Mhmm," she hummed.

_**on Brainiac's Skull-Ship. . . .**_

"He has already come and gone. He must have upgraded his body as well."

Bart smiled crookedly as he admired how her long blonde hair shimmered in the glow of the creepy green spaceship lights, "Yeah? What makes you say that?" he asked in a dreamy tone.

She looked up with a confused expression, pointing downwards.

His gaze followed her finger, "Holy crap! That's the green dude."

"How did you not notice it when we walked into the room?"

Bart's eyes darted away. "I wasn't staring at you."

"What?"

He coughed, "Nothing."

Kara narrowed her eyes, "You are weird, Bart Allen."

Bart grinned confidently, "Yeah..."

"Why do you keep acting like that is a good thing?"

He made a nervous expression, "It's not?"

Kara stared at him before walking away, Bart quickly berated himself.

"Get it together, Allen! She's going to think you're a doofus," he whispered.

"I have super-hearing, I can still hear you," she called, wearing a small smile that he couldn't see. He smacked the side of his head, rolling his eyes before following after her into a room filled with little glass bottle looking things.

"What are these things?" he looked towards Kara, but she looked like she was in shock. "Kara?"

Her eyes were as big as saucers as she stared at a bottle on the shelf, "Great Roa...it can't be...Kandor?"

**_to be continued in 'the Bottled City of Kandor'. . . ._**

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, what did you guys think? I thought it'd be fun to do a chapter with Bart and Kara, this is obviously pre-Bara, since they are fan favorites. I hope you guys liked it.

Like I said in my first chapter, I'm sorry it's taken so long to update! First I got uber-busy at work and then I was totally obsessed with Arkham City, but another problem was that I was kind of having writers block with the two options that I offered up, and ultimately decided to just post something else that I could get done! haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it and look forward to hearing your thoughts!

**Next Up:** I hate to say it after I just said I was having trouble finishing it, but _August 17th_ seems like the most likely if I can just get over the one hump that I need to get over to finish the chapter.


	179. TDOS Pt 3

**Review Comments:**

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And of course Clark is whipped! haha. And Bart will be there soon enough! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! And yes, I will admit, boys are easily distracted, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, I know that it was really hard to see Bruce like that because he is usually the rock in the group. This seemed like this would be one of those rare times we might see him break.

You...haven't...seen...Terminator 2...? This is _not_ ok. Who isn't with Bart on that one? haha. I should totally adapt that scene for this one! hahahaha. That would be sooooooooo funny! hahahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - There is definitely a reason for that particular date, haha. I'm glad that you liked Part 2! I knew that one would probably be the most controversial of them all, but everyone seems rather pleased. Bruce isn't a cry baby, but this isn't just some friend, this Clark. This is the one he looks up to. It rattled him to his core.

I love how Kara is totally unfamiliar with everything and Bart is this walking fountain of blah-blah-blah, haha. They are so weird together that it's just adorable, hahaha. I love writing those two together.

Oh! And btw! It was totally all Katlynne on _the Bet_ one-shot. She gave me WAAAAAYYYYYY too much credit! Isn't she just amazing? I think she is the best writer on this site, not that she'll ever listen to me! haha.

**_cathy03_** - Yeah, this is totally an obvious one! haha. Diana and Bruce are so perfect! haha. I love having them together! And yes, Bart and Kara are easily two of my favorites now, even if it's just me writing it that way, haha. I can't believe you didn't like Terminator 2! That's crazy talk! hahaha.

Oh, and watch for something in this chapter, I put it in there just for you, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Oh, I'm definitely working on that chapter where they watch it, hahaha. I'm glad you liked 'em!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Clois, mentions of Lexana, mentions of Clana

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments

**Chapter:** #179, the Death of Superman: Part 3

**Author's Note:** Here is Part three, this one will make up the Lex Luthor side of things.I hope you like it!

* * *

'_I should just throw myself out the window... Just like when I threw my father out..._'

The cold glass felt good against his head. The bumps and bruises were still sore from the night before, though it was his arm in it's sling that throbbed the worst. Still, it was hard to think about that with the sight below.

'_I bet every camera in Metropolis would turn away from the funeral and onto me if I jumped at the right moment. I don't see what I have left to lose. I've already lost it all. What am I going to do? Challenge the B-Squad? As if a man in a bat costume or a princess with a tiara could ever compare to who they'd be burying today._'

Of course, it was about more than that. Sure, he was genuinely distraught that he'd lost his main competition. The only challenge left for him. But there was definitely more to it than that. He wouldn't just miss the man in the cape, he'd miss the man in the glasses too. No matter who they had become, Clark was still his brother.

'_It's funny to think that I've spent all these years trying to kill him, and now that he is gone, this is the first time that I've felt grief since I don't know when,_' he mused to himself, taking a sip of his scotch.

He heard the door open to his office, but he didn't turn. He leaned back just slightly to see who it was in the reflection of the glass. He couldn't hold back the chuckle, '_Of course. She was the last time._'

"I didn't expect to see you today."

He could tell that she thought her presence would have more of an effect on him by the way that she hesitated to reply. After a beat or two, she spoke up. "I'm cured. I found one of the Lazarus Pits."

Lex turned slowly, "Those are a myth, not that it matters. You wouldn't hurt much anyways. Well, maybe his cousin."

"I saw what you did. You were very brave, trying to help-"

"I was doing what was best for humanity. I didn't do it for him. Doomsday would have turned it's sights on the rest of the planet after he was gone. Helping him was the lesser of two evils," he replied cooly.

She saw right through it. "You should try lying to someone who doesn't know you so well."

Lex gave her his trademark smirk, deflecting her statement with ease. "What are you doing here, Lana?"

Lana stood there for a second, trying to collect the remnants of the speech she had prepared in the elevator. Lex almost smiled as she looked down at her hands. She always did that when she was nervous.

"Clark believed in second chances. Actually, Clark believed in third, fourth, fifth, and sixth chances too as I'm sure you would remember," she taunted. Lex didn't bite. "After what I saw from you yesterday, I thought...I thought maybe I should give you a second chance. It's what Clark would have wanted. He knew that you-"

"Don't pretend you're here because of Clark."

She nodded slowly. "I know there is good in you. We were married, Lex. I did love you."

He gave her a cold smile, "Was this before or after you and Oliver tried to murder me?"

"I had nothing to do with that."

"I doubt you cried any tears over it. Not like you will for Clark."

Lana let out a scoff, shaking her head, "You're never going to get over that, are you?"

"You know what I think, Lana? I think you were holding out for the best. But now that the best is about to be shut up in a dusty tomb, you want the second best," he said with a smile, but his words cut like whips.

She was frozen, right where he wanted her.

"So, you ask if I'm ever going to get over being treated as second best to Clark? Let me ask you, will you ever get over being second best to Lois? Sure was interesting how he never even bothered to look for a cure. It's almost like..." Lex's grin only grew at this last piece. "It's almost like he realized your little return was a mistake and decided to move on with someone who was just _better_. So tell me, will you ever get over that?"

He took her exit as her answer.

**_after the funeral. . . ._**

Lois sat at the bench near the monument they had built at the foot of his tomb. She could just picture how embarrassed he would be. Giant concrete statue, complete with the hands of the hip and the flowing cape.

"_Please! Just let me melt it down! _" he'd plead with her, completely red faced. "_I don't want our kids to see that!_"

That last thought made her look down at her feet, letting a tear slip out. She had been trying to hard to keep it together all day. But that...that might be the tipping point if she dwelled on it for too long. So, she took a deep breath. She let the sun beat down on her, and that made her smile. The warmth reminded her of Clark.

She didn't know how long she sat there, she just knew that something had stepped in the way of the light. She felt cold all of a sudden. When she looked up, she saw a familiar face.

His smirk made her want to punch him in the face, but she knew she shouldn't. He had helped Clark. She knew that if he hadn't helped, Clark could have suffered a lot more. But that didn't mean she didn't hate him.

"Come to dance on his grave?"

He grimaced, "As hard as it might be for you to believe, I'm just as sad to see him go as you are."

"Do you really expect me to believe that?"

He looked around, making sure no one was around to hear him as he sat down next to her. "They just put my brother in that tomb, Lois. Not Superman, but _Clark_. He was the best man I ever knew. And I _will_ miss him."

Lois didn't know what to say. She just stared at him.

"I know you see me as the bad guy, but I only became one because Clark was so good, that he could never have been anything but the hero. I loved him like a brother. We had a destiny together, and now it's like the end of the book has been ripped out. Clark and I were supposed to be great men together, and now he's gone."

For a moment, Lois saw the Lex that Clark had told her he once knew. And she felt sorry for him. Lex Luthor was a very bad man, don't get her wrong. But in a twisted way, he really did care about Clark.

"Don't _ever_ think that I'm happy about this," he warned her.

Lois nodded. "I don't know why... But I know he'd feel the same hurt for you. I will never understand why, but he always had hope for you. And I know that... I know he was proud that you stepped up. I know he was proud that for however long... you were the man that he always hoped you would be."

They shared a long silence. They both knew that they would always be on separate sides, but right now, they were just two people who were sad to see someone go. For that moment, they weren't enemies.

"I'm sorry for your loss."

Lois nodded, "I'm sorry for you too."

He looked around for a moment, she assumed to compose himself, before giving her a nod and walking away. He had stood in front of the tomb for the longest time. He thought about his old Porsche, about how Clark had been the best man at one of his weddings and almost was at another.

Sometimes he had wished things had turned out so differently. A change in a series of events that had been within his control, who knows what they could have been. Other times he was glad things happened just as they had.

'_No matter how cut short our legend was, they'll be talking about it far into the future_,' he mused.

Lex leaned down, grabbed a fistful of dirt, and stared at the symbol on the door. He stood up and slowly walked towards the door, never taking his eyes off it. His fist rose into the air, and he let the dirt slowly fall out at the foot of the door, just as he had seen Clark do at Lionel's grave. Clark didn't know, but Lex had been watching.

He knelt in front of the door and placed his hand against Clark's family crest.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save you, Clark. Goodbye."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I wanted to show a different side from Lex, one where he kind of stepped out of his villain role and was himself for a few moments. And if ever there was a time, I think it would be then.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Thanks!

**Next Up:** _Paris_.


	180. Paris

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** I don't want to spoil it, hahaha.

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #180, Paris

**Author's Note:** So, this is a sequel to a previous chapter. I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I will say that it was a seemingly fan favorite, haha. Oh, and _**cathy03**_, there's something special in there for you!

Anyways, I hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

Straightening his tie, Clark walked into the Daily Planet to find the place in a frenzy. He looked around for Lois but didn't see her. He made his way towards his office when-

"Kent!"

He shuffled past his fellow reports and into Perry White's office. "Yes, Mr. White?"

"I need a background story for this terrorist group, get me everything you can."

Clark's eyebrows shot up, "I'm sorry, what? Terrorists?"

His editor-in-chief looked at him like he was insane to not know what he was talking about. "Get your head out of the clouds, Kent! Where have you been for the last twelve hours?"

Clark's eyes shifted away, '_Don't say intergalactic peace mission with the Green Lanterns. Don't say intergalactic peace mission with the Green Lanterns._' He swallowed and replied, "Uh, I was at home."

"Well? Don't you watch TV?"

He paled again. "Uh, I don't watch a lot of TV, Mr. White."

"Then what the hell have you been doing for the last twelve hours? Reading Dickens? Great shades of Elvis! There's a group of terrorists that have taken the Eiffel Tower hostage."

Jimmy nodded enthusiastically. "That's in Paris!"

Perry groaned, "He knows where the Eiffel Tower is, Olsen."

"Has anyone been hurt?"

Jimmy shook his head, "So far, none of the hostages have been harmed."

"Hostages?"

"Yeah! Tourists! About twenty of them!"

Perry waved his arms, "That's not even the half of it! These guys claim if the French Government doesn't pay up, they have a bomb that's going to level half of Paris. And since you didn't even know it was going on, I guess that means you don't know that we have one of our own there on the scene either."

Clark frowned before a moment of realization set in. "Please don't tell me it's Lois."

"As soon as the story broke, she was ripping out the door saying she had a friend in Gotham with a really fast jet."

A look of worry streaked across Clark's face, "Well, I better get working on that story, Mr. White."

He was gone before Perry could turn around. "Great Cesar's Ghost, why can't Olsen move that quick? Olsen!"

_**Paris, three hours later. . . .**_

"Pretty lucky for Superman to show up and save the day, huh? Especially since he doesn't answer his phone."

Clark groaned, "I've told you a hundred times! My cellphone doesn't work on Oa!"

Lois rolled her eyes playfully, "Just be glad the French make great doughnuts."

"I don't think they call them doughnuts though," he teased.

She was going to turn and kick his butt, but then she caught sight of something. She started to frown before looking back at Clark, and then back to whatever she was looking at.

"Everything ok?"

Lois shook her head slowly, "Clark...isn't that...do you see...isn't that you?"

He turned his head to see, well, himself sitting on a park bench. "What the..."

They sprinted over to see a Clark Kent doppelganger sitting there looking depressed. His skin was much paler than Clark's, and he also seemed to have an affinity for purple. He looked up to see Clark standing over him.

"Clark! Is it really you?"

Clark nodded, though Lois was in pure shock. "Clark, you wanna introduce me to your friend?"

"I'm Clark's...well we're...it's complicated."

"You don't say," she said in a sarcastic voice.

She looked at the real Clark, who was giving her a '_I have no idea what to say'_ look. "This Clark-"

"Woah, hold on, we're not going to say _this_ Clark and _that_ Clark. You are the real Clark, this is...I don't know...some kind of Bizarro Clark. Ok?"

The Bizarro Clark nodded, "Just call me Bizarro for short?"

Clark shook his head, "Aren't you a little offended being called Bizarro? Like you're bizzare or something?"

Bizarro shrugged, "I _am_ bizarre."

Clark frowned but accepted it, "You know, you look awfully pale, are you feeling ok?"

"I don't know man, I mean, lately? I feel really off."

Lois quirked an eyebrow, "How so?"

"Like watch this." He turned to make sure no one was looking before squinting at a mailbox. Suddenly, ice beams shot from his eyes. Lois and Clark exchanged looks, Lois held her hand up.

"Doesn't _fire_ come out of your eyes, Smallville?"

Bizarro shook his head, "That's what I said! And watch this!" He proceeded to melt the ice off with flame breath.

"It's like everything is working backwards," offered Clark.

"And every once in a while, I no talk funny."

They frowned. "What?"

"Kent!"

They all turned to see Lana Lang sprinting down the street. Both Lois and Clark panicked and turned around. Bizarro muttered "_Doh_!" and walked towards Lana.

"Just pretend like we are tourists, don't bring any attention to ourselves," whispered Lois.

Clark whisper-yelled, "Don't you think I know that?"

Suddenly they heard Lana screaming at Bizarro. She kept calling him Kent for some reason.

"Maybe she calls him Kent Clark? Because it's the backwards version of your name?"

Clark snorted, "It's a lot better than _Bizarro_."

Lois clenched her jaw, "There goes the sexy lingerie I bought earlier."

"_Doh_!"

They listened in on their conversation from afar, pretending to be window shopping, and noticed that Bizarro kept using words improperly. At least in what they assumed ought to have been responses to Lana's yelling. And the more bizarre part, was that Lana didn't seem to find them strange at all.

"You think that he is using backwards words too?"

Clark shook his head, "His brain must be fried... You don't think that-"

"Lana drove him insane? Yeah, I'm going to go with that," nodded Lois.

Clark frowned, "Do you think I would have ended up like that?"

"Well, if you didn't after eight seasons-"

"Eight seasons?"

"I meant twenty-one years..." she looked around awkwardly. "If you didn't after twenty-one years, I doubt you were going to end up like that. But hey, not everyone is as mentally durable as you are, Smallville."

Clark nodded and shot Lois a look before mumbling, "_As you've proven..._"

"What was that?"

"Nothing," he gulped and turned back to watch the fight at hand. Lois shook her head with a '_you-gunna-die-for-that-later_' snarl and turned back to watch as well.

Watching Bizarro and Lana scream at each other in the middle of the street, Lois and Clark started to feel more uncomfortable and awkward than they could ever remember feeling. Clark _almost_ asked her about the weather just to lighten the mood. Finally, Lana stomped off and Bizarro shuffled over towards them.

"Lana love Bizarro very much."

Clark frowned and whispered to Lois, "That means she hates him, right?"

Lois shrugged, "I think so?"

Bizarro made a very sad face, so she rushed over to give him a hug. "I'm sorry, little fella." He started to wrap his arms around her and one hand slowly slid down to, "Woah! That's my ass!"

She pushed him away, only to see a silly grin on his face. "Bizarro hate Lois."

"Well, that's not very nice," muttered Clark.

"That means he loves me!"

Clark frowned, "What?"

Bizarro started walking towards Lois with open arms, so she panicked and jumped behind Clark. "Stop him!"

"Uh, Bizarro, I don't think this is a good-"

In a flash, he punched Clark across the street. "Yes, staying between Bizarro and Looiiiissss."

"Uh...please don't come any closer."

"But Bizarro no love Loooiiissss."

He tried to advance, but Clark immediately showed up and punched Bizarro into the sky. Lois turned towards Clark with a wild face. "What the hell is going on here?"

"I don't know!"

Suddenly they heard a "Loooooooiiiiiiissssss," off in the distance.

Her eyes grew big, "Oh, hell no, he's coming back."

Clark grimaced along with her. "I guess if he is going to do everything the opposite...that means he's going to like you instead of Lana?" She hung her head, he looked sad. "I thought we were going to be bros..."

"Would you please just go kick his ass?"

"Do I have to?"

Lois gave him a wild look. "He _grabbed_ my _ass_!"

"He's sick or something! I can't fight an ill person!"

She made a face of pure shock. "Kiss or Kill, Smallville. Kiss or Kill. Choose wisely."

Clark slouched over, "Fiiiiinnnne."

She patted his head and ripped his shirt open to reveal his Superman shield. "Go get 'em, Smallville."

* * *

**Author's Note: **How was that? hahaha. I know a lot of you wanted to see Bizarro make a reappearance and I knew I had an idea on how to do it, but it wasn't until I was watching Superman II the other night that I figured out how to begin the chapter! haha. That's why there are so many Superman II references in there.

Oh, and cathy03, now you get your "Loooiiiisssss" moments, hahaha. Hope you liked it! Shoot me a review and let me know!

**Next Up:** _August 17th_, and I mean it this time! haha.


	181. August 17th

**Review Comments:**

**_Katlynne_** - It seemed like a very Lex-ish thing to do, haha. Yeah, you don't dump Lex Luthor, haha. He takes it a little too personally, hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it!

I know right? hahaha. Even Bizarro knows to listen to her, haha. It must be Clark's memories, hahaha.

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - He'll definitely be the same Lex Luthor who is at war with Clark. I think these feelings are always there, he just can't help himself from competing against Clark. His victory will only ever come in Clark surrendering as less than Lex, and that will never happen, so they will forever be like this.

As for the Reign of Supermen arc with Cyborg Superman, Steel, the Eradicator, and Superboy, we will kind of see that a little bit. I don't know if we'll do Cyborg Superman or Steel right now, I know we'll definitely do Steel at a later date, but we will see the Eradicator in some form and possibly Superboy. I did do a chapter where Lois bring the non-Alexander Luthor Superboy home in Chapter 47's _Connor_, which can be included in this arc.

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm glad that I'm getting you on my side of the fence! haha. I know that it's a controversial bit considering the fans of the comics and the fans of the show, but Lex and Clark's relationship was probably the biggest thing that made me keep watching Smallville (pre-Lois anyways, haha), so I had to bring it back! haha.

My biggest inspiration for that was Batman and the Joker. The Joker wants to kill Batman and keep him around for a challenge at the same time. As he says, "I don't hate you because I'm crazy, Bats. I'm crazy because I hate you." I think he wanted to jump out the window more to steal attention though, haha.

Ain't that the truth! Amen! haha. Even Jonathan dumped Lana's Aunt Nell for the right woman, those Lanes are just too much to deal with, haha. They turn men into Bizarro! haha. Well, here's the chapter! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I got your first review and was like, "doesn't she know i meant it for the second chapter? Oops, I must have forgotten to say that!" Lol! Well, finally you got what I was talking about! haha. I'm glad that you liked it! I just had to write that chapter for you guys! And yes, it's definitely canon now! hahaha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chollie, Bruce/Diana, mentions of the Lanes

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #181, August 17th

**Author's Note: **Alrighty, the long awaited _August 17th_ chapter. Hopefully it'll be worth wait! Enjoy!**  
**

* * *

Lois looked over just in time to see Clark frowning slightly, and she knew that his ears were going to town on some super-hearing. It was only a matter of time before Clark coughed quietly and made up an excuse.

"Uh...Mr. Perry? I mean Mr. Chief, uh, Mr. White?"

Perry rolled his eyes as Clark fumbled over his words. "Yes, Kent?"

Clark grimaced, "I'm not feeling uh.. so well..." Lois grinned, "...and I was hoping that I could-"

"Kent, you're a star reporter for the Daily Planet. You can't just call in sick because-"

"Lois made dinner last night," chimed in Clark.

"-I completely understand, take as much time as you need."

Her jaw dropped as Clark scurried out of the office, doing his best to avoid her wrath. "What the hell, Chief?"

Clark landed on the rooftop of Queen Industries as Oliver was coming out the roof access door with a huff. "Joey has been on my case all day. Maybe buying her a cellphone was a bad idea after all," he grumbled.

"Oh, you think you've got it bad? Lois is going to kill me when she finds out that I'm meeting you instead of going to help somebody with an emergency," countered Clark.

Ollie gave him a dirty look, "Do you have any idea how scary Joey can be when she wants something done? I think she might have ended up with a double scoop of the crazy from her mother..."

Clark nodded, "You should see her tantrums when Lois makes her brush her teeth."

"See them? I had to replace the marble floors in our bathroom after Chloe caught her _fake _brushing her teeth one night and Joey stomped her foot. She's like a mini-Lois with your powers, man. It's terrifying."

Clark shuddered. "Tell me about it."

"Now, can you please explain to me why I have to go with you? Can't you just fly there and do it?"

He rolled his eyes and gave Oliver a stern look, "Because I don't speak _German_."

**_later that day. . . ._  
**

Clark and Oliver stumbled in the front door to the Kent Farm, each knowing that Jo'an would have their heads if they were late for the festivities. They made it halfway to the kitchen when Lois caught them.

"And where have you two been?"

They exchanged looks. "Doing...uh...super...uh...superhero..-ey...things?" muttered Oliver.

Lois quirked an eyebrow, "Uhuh. And speaking of superhero-ey things..." Clark grimaced, "...what the hell was so important that you made up that story about my cooking making you sick, Smallville?"

Once again, they exchanged looks. Jo'an had walked in just as they each blurted out:

"Orphans," offered Clark.

"Fire," offered Oliver.

They exchanged worried looks.

"Fire," changed Clark.

"Orphans," tried Oliver.

Lois did not look amused.

"Which was it? _Orphans_ or _fire_?"

Jo'an tried to help "They were orphans that _were..._on fire?"

Oliver and Clark stared at the young girl, Jo'an gave them a snarky look and nodded back towards her mother. "Head in the game!" she whispered harshly at the two of them, who each stood up straighter.

Lois stood there, hand on her hips, and looked like she could kill them with her glare alone.

"So, there were little orphans on fire, eh, Smallville?"

Clark gulped. "Uh...yeah?"

Oliver nudged him, whispering harshly, "Act like you've been in the end-zone before, man!"

Clark shot him a look and whispered just as harshly, "She's scary!"

"Enough!" shouted Lois. "What the hell is going on here?"

"Happy birthday to you..."

They turned to see Diana and Chloe walking through the door with a large birthday cake.

Lois turned to Clark with a sly smile, "you son of a-"

"...happy birthday to you..."

More of the Justice League walked in behind in behind them, each holding presents in their arms. Clark, Oliver, and Jo'an decided to partake in the singing this time. "...happy birthday, dear Lois..."

Clark zoomed away quickly and returned with a box in hand in time for-

"...happy birthday to you."

They all cheered, Lois turned back to look at Clark with a very loving smile. He grinned back, extending the small box in his hand while telling her, "Happy birthday, Lois."

She quickly ran over and ripped the box from his hands, tearing the wrapping paper to shreds.

"If he got her another stars and stripes set, I'm out of here," quipped Bart.

Lois turned and snarled at the poor boy, "I don't need _another_ set, I still have-" Everyone in the room got wide eyed, causing Lois to turn bright red. "I mean...shut the hell up, Bozo!"

She opened up the box, and soon after, her mouth opened as her jaw hung open as she pulled the beautiful necklace from the box. She covered her mouth as she started to tear up. "It's-"

"Your mother's necklace. Your dad told me that they lost it when they were stationed in Germany. I had Carter do some checking around and he found it. We went and picked it up today, that's why I left," Clark explained.

"We?"

Oliver raised his hand, "That would be me. I assume this means I get immunity for his bad excuses."

Lois ignored that last part as she eyed the jewelry in her hand. She remembered this. She remembered how she used to play with it while she sat in her mother's lap. She looked up at Clark with teary eyes.

"Oh, Smallville..."

He grinned, "I was hoping you'd say that."

She didn't miss a beat and ran straight at him, tackling him to the ground with a kiss.

"How does he do that?" grins Oliver. "One minute she wants to kill him, the next she's kissing him... And woah! A little more than that, avert your eyes children!" he quipped while turning Jo'an and Bruce around.

Bruce smacked his hands away, "I'm not a child, Oliver!"

Diana rolled her eyes, "Even though you have an entire cave filled with toys?"

"They're not toys! They're highly sophisticated instruments of justice."

They all gave him disbelieving looks, so Bruce folded.

"Alright, some of them are toys, but that doesn't make me a child!"

Diana put her arm around him and directed him back to the party. "Whatever you say, Dear."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. So, for those of you that missed it, August 17th was the birthday of one Lois Lane and I've had this idea of Ollie and Clark getting into trouble for a while now! Anyways, I hope that you all liked it and can't wait to hear what you thought! Thanks!

**Next Up:** I'm going to let you guys vote. The next two that are most available are _Grayson_ (as in Dick Grayson) and _Metropolis_. _Grayson_ is done, but here is the hold up, it's a serious chapter. Since we've been getting a lot of serious stuff with _the Death of Superman_, I've been holding off, but _Metropolis_ isn't quite done, so it's up to you!

One tomorrow that is serious? Or one by Friday or Saturday that is funny? You choose!


	182. Grayson

**Review Comments:**

_**Whatever-the-weather**_ - Yeah, I think Lois terrifies them both to the point that they can't even think, haha.

**_Lovelybutterfly17_** - That's his strong suit, so I thought it was a good way to go. And yeah, I'm not really sure how to classify Ollie and Jo'an, but if anything, big brother and little sister seems the best way to go.

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad that you liked them!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - We'll get both since the voting came out as a tie, but I promise some laughs during Metropolis! Not many people can make Lois Lane speechless, but Clark Kent is definitely one of them. I'm glad that you liked it! Yes! hahaha. I meant to say the Lang women! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I should have thought of that bit with Chloe! That would have been hilarious! haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - Normally Lana would be a buzz kill, but when she is the punching bag? Yeah, we're all down for that, haha. I loved the relationship that Smallville gave Lex and Clark, and I'm pretty proud of how the chapter worked with those themes of brotherhood. Lex was just a guy who hated Superman, Smallville made him a fleshed out nemesis.

If you want one, I'll write one! haha. Not sure who it will be, but I'll figure something out. I'm glad that you dug August 17th, even if I didn't give you enough of the hanky panky as Jo'an would say, haha. I'm still missing Lois too, though it helped seeing her in Charlie's Angels and I hear that her new show got picked up for 13 episodes! Yay!

**_cathy03_** - I'm glad that you liked it! Yeah, it seemed like a very Clark thing to do.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #182, Dick Grayson

**Author's Note: **Alright, since the voting came out tied, I decided to post both _Grayson_ and _Metropolis_ at the same time, but I've been having a hard time finishing _Metropolis_, so here's the deal: I'll post _Grayson_ and do my best to post either _Metropolis_ or something else humorous shortly after. Anwyays, enjoy!

* * *

"Hey...Hey, look at me," pleaded Clark. Bruce continued to hang his head, so Clark grabbed it to make him look up. "Hey, look at me! Bruce!" His friend looked worse than Clark had ever seen him, and that scared Clark.

Bruce clenched his eyes shut before opening them, filled with pain. It was enough that Clark almost lost it.

"What kind of hero does that? If I would have spoken up, the Graysons would be alive right now. I always think I can out-smart them, but tonight it cost two innocent people their lives, Clark... What kind of hero does that?"

"I know, that all you can think about right now, are the two people who died tonight..." Clark's voice broke slightly. "But look at this city, Bruce. When I came here as a kid, people walked these streets like they were scared that they weren't going to make it back home. They were terrified...but not anymore."

Bruce gave him a questioning look.

"You've saved an entire city, Bruce. You're _that_ kind of hero. Two people died tonight, but you've saved so many."

He looked away from Clark, "That kid is gunna be all alone, Clark. I heard Gordon, he doesn't family. I let that kid become an orphan like me, like you. And we both know how hard that is. We both know how easy it is to fall into a dark place, but we had people to pull us back. Your parents... Alfred... Who's going to help him, Clark?"

He looked down at the ground, and Clark let out a sigh. It was a fair point, but then he had a thought.

"Then maybe you should be that person."

Bruce looked up, "What?"

"When I was alone, without family, good people took me in. They saw someone who needed help, and they wanted to make a difference in their life. You can be that person for him, Bruce."

He shook his head, "I'm not fit to help-"

Clark held up his hand to silence him. "You're the best man that I know, and you know what it's like to lose your parents. If anyone is fit to help someone in his situation, it's _you_."

**_two weeks later. . . ._  
**

"Mr. Wayne, surely you can understand my hesitance?"

Bruce nodded. "I do, sir. I know that...my public image...paints me as the kind of person that you wouldn't be inclined to hand a life over to. But Mr. Grayson isn't just any life. His parents have been murdered. Murdered by the same kind of low-life criminals that murdered mine. I just... I just want to make a difference in his life."

Judge Nolan nodded slowly, taking in Bruce's words before glancing to an officer. "Bring him out."

The Officer disappeared for a moment and brought out a young boy, no older than thirteen or fourteen. He looked around the room nervously, Bruce gave him a small smile that seemingly calmed him slightly.

"Mr. Grayson?"

The boy looked up at Nolan, "Yes, sir?"

"What's that on your face? Is that a black eye? Has someone hit you?"

He swallowed and nodded, "Yes, sir."

Nolan frowned, "Who hit you, Son?"

"Uh, well, I'm from the circus, sir. That doesn't exactly make me popular at the orphanage, sir."

Nolan shook his head, ashamed at what the boy had been through. "I understand that you've met with Mr. Wayne?" Dick nodded. "And he's talked to you about taking you under his care?"

Dick nodded again. "Mr. Wayne said he wasn't going to try and be my father. He wouldn't adopt me, he'd just make me his ward. He said that he understood what I was going through and that all he wanted was to make things as good as he could for me. If I can't be with my-" he cut off and looked away, willing back his tears. "If I can't be with them, I'd like to be with Mr. Wayne if that's ok with you, sir."

"Now, Mr. Wayne is a well known public figure, Mr. Grayson. His wealth and his lifestyle have been made very public in recent years," explained Nolan before shooting Bruce a look. "If the reason you want to become Mr. Wayne's ward is because you think that you'll a fortune at your disposal-"

"Mr. Judge, sir?" interrupted Dick to the Nolan's annoyance. "Like I said, I grew up in a circus tent. I don't know the first thing about money. I just know that Mr. Wayne understands what I'm going through. I know that doesn't sound like much, but it's not nothing. And it means a lot to me. So, I'd like to be Mr. Wayne's ward."

An hour and a large stack of paperwork later, Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson were walking down the steps of City Hall with smiles on their faces. Dick was coming home as Bruce's ward, but first, they were going to lunch.

"Where are we going to eat?"

Bruce smiled. "To a restaraunt called Luigi's Pizza. We're going to meet a couple of my friends."

"Ok. What are they like?"

Alfred shared a knowing smile with Bruce. "Well, they're either going to be all over each other, or they're going to be on the verge of killing each other. Depends on whether or not Olsen ate the last maple doughnut again."

Dick grinned, "They sound funny."

Bruce chuckled, "Yeah. They're _super_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, what did you think? I've been working on a Batman project on the side that intertwines with my Superman stuff, and I've been looking for these good cross-over points, and I went with Clark helping advise him about reaching out to Dick Grayson. Hopefully it worked and hopefully you guys liked it! Let me know!

**Next Up:** Hopefully_ Metropolis_.


	183. Bottled City of Kandor

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Bara

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #183, the Bottled City of Kandor

**Author's Note:** This chapter is the continuation of chapter #178, _Brainiac's Skull-Ship_. Enjoy!

* * *

_Kara stared at him before walking away, Bart quickly berated himself._

_"Get it together, Allen! She's going to think you're a doofus," he whispered._

_"I have super-hearing, I can still hear you," she called, wearing a small smile that he couldn't see. He smacked the side of his head, rolling his eyes before following after her into a room filled with little glass bottle looking things._

_"What are these things?" he looked towards Kara, but she looked like she was in shock. "Kara?"_

_Her eyes were as big as saucers as she stared at a bottle on the shelf, "Great Roa...it can't be...Kandor?"_

Bart frowned, "What's Kandor? And what's Roa? Wait, didn't Roa have something to do with the Kandori- ooooh..."

She turned around, "What do you know about Kandorians?"

"Uh... Like, a few years back this weird dude with an accent, which didn't really make sense, because why does an Alien have a british accent? But whatever, the point is that he showed up with these Kandorian dudes, well, there were some girls, I guess they were soldiers or something, but they weren't real soldiers, they were clones or something, which was also weird, because where did these clones come from? That little orb thing? That doesn't really make sense, it reminded me of this movie-"

"Bart!"

He flinched, "Right. Long story short, they were sent to some kind of alternate universe or something. It didn't really get explained very well. Oh, and the british alien clone dude ended up in the Phantom Zone somehow and bonded with his original self, it was a whole thing. Lois almost shot Tess. It was just really confusing."

Kara stared at him. For a _very_ long time. "I'll just ask Clark."

Bart nodded. "That's probably a better idea. I only really listen in-between bites of food."

They stood their awkwardly for a very long while before Bart finally spoke up again. "So...Kandor?"

"Kandor was the capital city on Krypton. It was a place where many Kryptonians sought out for a fresh start. It's where my mother was born. When my parents became estranged, my father moved us to Kryptonopolis while my mother stayed behind in Kandor," she explained in a sad voice. Even Bart picked up the hint.

"What happened?"

Kara looked around the room, taking in all the bottles. "Brainiac. Many believed that Zod corrupted Brainiac, though now that I look back, I'm sure that my father had a hand in it. Shortly before Krypton's destruction, he used his army of machines to bottle up the city and steal it from the very crust of Krypton."

"He stole a whole city?" Kara nodded. "That's intense."

"Brainiac was rumored to have stolen many cities from many planets. It was part of his elaborate plan to try collect and learn as much about alien culture as he could. Kandor was just the beginning."

Bart frowned, "Wait, so all these bottles...are cities?" Kara nodded as she stood over one in particular. "And that...is that Kandor?" She didn't respond, he looked at one of the other bottles. "Hey, Kara...I think...I think there are people in this one." She turned and walked over. "Aren't those little people waving at us?"

"I think so..."

They shared a look and then looked back at the bottle labeled Kandor. "Kara...you don't think that there are a bunch of little Kryptonian dudes running around in that bottle, do you? Do you think your-"

"I don't know."

Bart gave her a look, "Well, let's find out!" Kara didn't move. She looked terrified. "What's wrong?"

"I left before. I left Earth because I had heard that Kandor was still out there. I left Earth and Kal-El to find it, and I never did. I made peace with that. I can't...I can't let myself hope...I can't let myself hope that-"

"Hey." She turned to look at him. "You have to look. You have to be brave. I know that I'm probably the last person that you wanna hear about courage from, but trust me, family is worth taking that risk. I ran out on my family and was alone for a long time, but I've got a new family now, and I'd never make that mistake again."

Kara stared at him for a few moments. This was a new side to Bart. She smiled. She liked it.

She turned and walked towards the bottle on the shelf. She peer through the glass, using her micro-vision to see that there were indeed people inside. She tapped on the glass lightly, and saw that the people inside recoil from the sound, she deduced that they might be able to hear her. "Hello," she tried. "Can you hear me?"

The people inside indicated that they could. Kara hesitated for a few moments.

"My name is Kara Zor-El. I am looking for my mother, Alura In-Ze," she said in a nervous voice.

Bart began to sweat.

'_Ok, don't freak out, don't freak out. If her mom isn't in there, she's probably going to kill me for making her do this and oh god, she's so strong, she's like Clark strong. Ok, don't freak out_,' but then he had a thought that made him smile. '_Then again, she might kiss you if her mom is chilling in there , and that'd be awesome._'

Kara slowly turned, shock streaking across her face. Bart's breath got short. "Kara?"

Suddenly, she ran at him and threw her arms around him, hugging him fiercely. She squeezed him, causing him to gasp for air. "Kara...you're turning me into a tube of toothpaste..."

She leaned back with a questioning smile.

"You know, because you squeeze a tube of toothpaste and the cap busts off and the paste, my brains in this situation, come flying out," he explained to her in a nervous frenzy.

She shook her head with a wild smile, "My mother is inside. My mother is alive!"

"That's gre-"

She kissed him. Bart fainted mid-kiss.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. It was kind of an interesting chapter to write because I was trying to bridge the gap between the Smallville Brainiac and the comic book Brainiac, while keeping in line with the comic book's Bottled City of Kandor which has both Kara's mother and father (with this whole side thing with Argo City which seemed like too much to add) but dealing with Kara's parents' back story on the show.

But at the core of it, I wanted Bart to be a dork and for him to help her muster up the courage, thus bonding them and making _Bara_ happen, haha. Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Let's try for _Metropolis_ this time, haha. I just can't come up with the right ending! It's driving me nuts! haha. The rest of it has been written for ages, but the ending is being a brat! haha.


	184. KZXP

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - See? I didn't forget to reply to your review, hahaha. I'm not sure who I would be more scared of, Jo'an or Lois? haha. I mean, Jo'an has the powers, but Lois has got something else entirely, haha.

I think out of everybody, Clark is the most likely person he'd open up to, so it feels kind of natural to write them having serious talks. Really? Dick Grayson is one of my all-time favorites! I just picture Bart ranting Morgan-style 90% of the time, hahaha. And like Morgan, he has his wise moments, haha.

_**Lilbit4**_ - Well, I hope you liked them then! haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I believe that in the comics, Dick was about twelve years old, but no older than thirteen or fourteen. I went with the older end because it seemed more realistic in terms of his eventual rise to Robin. That's why a lot of people have a big problem with Robin, they see it being completely unrealistic for Batman to take on a kid as a partner. Which in turn is why I tried to add that extra emotional side for why Bruce adopts him in the first place.

Well, she won't meet Zor-El, he is dead, haha. But Alura is a scary lady, haha. I don't know if they aim for it, I think it's a Kryptonian thing, haha. Though I supposed Bruce and Diana fall under that banner sometimes, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - That's what I was going for. A lot of people question why Bruce would take in a kid like that, so I tried to give it a more emotional connection of Bruce wanting to help someone the way that Alfred had helped him. A '_you can be a hero with more than just your fists and gadgets_' kind of deal, haha.

Well, in the comics, there's been a few different stories, and I'm not sure where I'll go with it just yet. The next adventure will be Clark and Kara finding a way to communicate with the people inside, which has endless possibilities! haha. I love Bart and Kara because he is such a goof and she is so serious, haha. It's blast to write.

_**alexindigo**_ - Yeah, I'm super excited to see it! It's got Michael Shanks (Carter Hall) in it too, so that's awesome! Yeah, I watch the episodes sometimes while I write to get the feel down right, so I hear you loud and clear!

I was trying to come up with a name for the Judge and I thought, "might as well" haha. Yeah, I have an idea for the Jealous Clark chapter you mentioned, so I'd expect to see it sometime soon! Microvision is so silly, haha, but I had to come up with something and it just fit so I went with it, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12, but _**LoisNClark4Ever**_ inspired this chapter, so major props for her!

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chollie

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #184, KZXP

**Author's Note: **Alrighty, this one is a kinda-sorta sequel to chapter #175's _Good Morning, Metropolis!_ but it's not like it's a continuation or anything like that. Just a bit of a _in the same vein_ type deal. Anyways, enjoy!

* * *

Flipping her phone open, "Go for Lane."

"Lois? Hey! It's Dena down at KZXP!"

"Oh! Hey, how are you doing?"

She could almost hear Dena smiling through the phone. "Well, we need a sub-host and I was hoping that you and Clark would be available for next week...?" she asked in a hopeful voice.

Lois nearly exploded with excitement. "We would love to! We had so much fun last time!"

"Perfect! Oh, and I had this amazing idea, you're friendly with Superman, right?"

"Well, I don't want to brag, but I have his personal number."

Dena cheered, "Well, do you think that he would do a favor for you?"

Lois let a smirk form, "I think that I could get him to do pretty much whatever I want."

"Great! I was hoping you would say that, he would be a great guest for the show."

"Yeah, wait, what?"

"Perfect! I'll let my boss know that we'll have Superman on the show! Thanks, Lois!"

"Wait! No, Dena? Hello? Hello?" she asked into her phone before realizing that Dena was gone. "Crap."

Lois ripped up the stairs, bursting into the main bullpen. She hopped in the air, trying to see over the cubicles to spot her husband's head. When she couldn't find him, she tore off down the center row towards their office. She found him sitting at his desk, working on a story no doubt. "Honey, Sweetie, Honey, I need to talk to you."

He looked up slowly, Ok..."

She gave him a nervous smile, "I uh...I kind of did something bad..."

"...you didn't kill anyone did you?"

"Clark! No! Of course not! What would make you think that?"

He saw Jimmy walking by, "Jimmy!"

The photographer turned on his heel and walked back to their office, "Yeah, CK? What's up?"

"Have you seen Cat?"

Lois rolled her eyes with a huff. Jimmy frowned, "Yeah, she's at her desk, why?"

Clark shifted his gaze to Lois and then back to Jimmy, "...she's alive, right?"

"Clark!"

"Sorry! I'm just checking! You freak me out when you do the whole '_honey, sweetie, honey_' thing!"

Being the smart young man that he was, Jimmy decided to leave before he witnessed a crime. Lois sat down with a huff and started to try to explain to Clark what she had done, who was still completely in the dark.

"I kind of...well, I didn't really...it was more...she was the one...you have to promise it's kiss and not kill!"

"Lois, what is going on?"

She sighed loudly, "I kind of told Dena at KZXP that Superman would be our guest when we sub-host..."

Clark raised his eyebrows, "But...but I'm...Superman..."

_**one week later at KZXP. . . .**_

"It's a bummer that Clark came down with the flu," mused Dena.

Lois nodded, "Yeah... He visited a relative up north and the cold weather just didn't agree with him."

"Well, I'm so glad that you came up with this idea for his replacement."

"Yeah, he kind of owed me for ruining our date during our initial taping."

Dena smiled, "Alright, well, we're ready for taping, so places everyone!"

Lois sat down next to Oliver, and at the signal from the camera man, "Welcome to _Good Morning, Metropolis!_ We have a very special guest this morning. You know him as the Man of Steel, please welcome, Superman!"

Clark walked out and onto the set, looking nervous but trying to keep his composure. "Thank you Ms. Lane, Mr. Queen."

"Thank you for taking the time to be with us!" chimed Lois.

"Yeah, thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule, Supes." They shot Oliver a look, but he just smirked and whispered to himself, "This is gunna be awesome!"

Lois closed her eyes, "Oh god..."

"So, tell me, _Superman_," smirked Oliver. "Why do you wear your underwear on the outside of your costume? Is this a Kryptonian fashion statement? Are you trying to be like a superhero version of Lady Gaga?"

Clark gritted his teeth. "My mother made me this suit."

"And what a dashing suit it is," tried Lois, laughing nervously.

"Have you ever thought about wearing something, oh I don't know, armored? You kind of look like you're about to try out for the Metropolis Ballet," he looked in the camera now. "Its almost as bad as that guy who dresses like a _bat_."

Taking a deep sigh, Clark's eyes flashed red. "I'm kind of bullet-proof, so I don't really need armor."

Oliver made a face, "Riiiiiiight. What about some of these powers you've got? I mean, x-ray vision? Doesn't that seem kind of perv-y to you? I don't know about the viewers at home, but the idea that you can check out my underbits-"

"I don't check out anyone's underbits, Mr. Queen."

"Not even Lois here? I mean, she is awful attractive, Supes. I know if I had x-ray vision-"

"Oliver!" screeched Lois.

He gave her a '_what?_' face. Clark almost growled, "Ms. Lane is a married woman."

Lois nodded, "Yes, a very happily married woman."

"But what if she wasn't married? Would you sneak a peak? Check out the goods?" he taunted.

Clark gave Lois a look that clearly stated that Oliver was going to die. "Of course not."

"Right, right, you're the perfect boyscout. You know, I think Queen Industries might have to look into investing in lead under-garments because that could be a venture worth getting into. I can see the slogan now, '_for the ones who don't want to be oogled by Superman_' or maybe '_for preventing the real reason we call him the Man of Steel'_," quipped Ollie.

Lois looked like she wanted to die, "Well folks, that's about all the time we have today."

"Ah, really? I had so many questions left to ask!" chuckled Oliver.

Clark glared at Oliver before turning to smile at the camera, "Yeah, I really should be out on patrol."

"Lets do it again soon?" smirked Ollie.

"Uh..."

_**later that night. . . .**_

Chloe opened the door to the bathroom to see Oliver sitting in a tub of ice, his pants laying on the ground with burn marks all across the butt. She shook her head as he looked up with a grimace and said,

"Worth it."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. So, LoisNClark4Ever had said something in her review of _Good Morning, Metropolis!_ about how it would be cool to see them interview Superman if not for Clark being Superman since obviously he could interview himself, and that just gave me the idea of a sub, and who better than Ollie? haha.

Then that made me think, "if Oliver could say anything he wanted and know Clark couldn't hurt him because the cameras were rolling, what would he say?" and this is what came to be, haha. Hope you liked it!

**Next Up:** Honestly, I keep saying _Metropolis_, but if I went with my gut, it'd say it'll probably be something else. Oh, and it will probably be coupled with the fourth installment of _TDOS_, but no promises! haha.


	185. TDOS Pt 4

**Review Comments:**

_**whatever-the-weather** _- It sounds like Oliver was a big hit with most people, haha. Glad you liked it!

**_LoisNClark4Ever_** - I'm glad that I could do your great idea proud! haha. I kind of picture their next guest-spot with Ollie tied up in a trunk somewhere with a gag in his mouth, hahaha. Yeah, when I came up with that idea, I just had to put it at the end there, haha. No _Metropolis_ in this one, but hopefully you'll like it all the same!

_**cathy03** _- I don't know if I'll ever post my Batman stuff, but maybe one day, haha. I can't remember their talk from Batman Forever off the top of my head, so I'm going to have to watch it again to see, haha. I think there is just so much mutual respect between Bruce and Clark that they can have these kinds of talks.

They haven't as far as I know, but I love the two of them together, haha. I'm glad that you liked KZXP! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't be getting cocky, you. I'm glad you liked the chapter.

**_Mpj891_** - Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

_**sasslady**_ - I'm glad that you've liked what I've posted! You were missed! haha. Hopefully I can keep it up!

**_Lilbit4_ **- Here I am! haha. Oh, and btw, the next chapter is your chapter! Brilliant idea!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Bara, Hal/Tess

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #185, the Death of Superman: Part 4

**Author's Note: **Alright, I know I have been gone for a while. Things have been hectic and I just haven't had the time or really the energy to sit down and write. Hopefully I'll be back for a while before things get crazy again, and I'll definitely be finishing _the Death of Superman_ before my next hiatus! Hope you enjoy these two!

* * *

"Who are you?"

She looked over at him, wrapped up in a blanket and scared half to death. "Lois. Lois Lane."

The déjà vu was not lost on her.

He nodded. She said it like he ought to know her. He wondered if he should. To him, she was just some lady who broke him out of that lab. He shuddered at the thought of Cadmus Labs. "Why are you helping me?"

Lois looked back over at him, one of his stray hairs fell over his forehead in an all too familiar way.

"Trust me, Kid. You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

* * *

"Then why don't you explain it to me? Slowly?"

Wally snorted, but quickly recoiled at the looks he received. "What? She just asked the fastest dudes on the planet to do something slowly, and I'm the only one that finds something funny about this?"

Chloe just glared at him. "Bart said that he time traveled. I want to know if either of you know how..."

"I don't know how he did it," offered Barry. "Bart doesn't tell us about the future, or how he got here. He says that it can mess things up, like he could end up not even being born. All I know is that it has to do with Iris."

She hung her head, "If we could send help back...even if it was just one person...we could save him..."

Wally and Barry exchanged looks, Wally roped an arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry, Chlo."

"I just wish...I wish I could have done something...I wish..."

* * *

Kara looked up towards the stars. "I used to wish sometimes... that I didn't have any memories of Krypton. Because maybe I'd be like Kal-El. Maybe I wouldn't miss it so much. But then I met you, and I got to know Lois and became so close to Karen and Cassie that I stopped wishing. Because I had a new family. And it was all because of Clark."

Bart gave her a sad look, but didn't speak. He didn't know what to say.

"For the first time in a long time, I wish I couldn't remember...because now...I feel so alone."

He might not have known what to say a moment ago, but he knew exactly what to do and say now. He grabbed her and pulled her close, hugging her tightly. "I promise, you'll never be alone as long as I'm around."

She clung to him tightly. "I don't care what I have to do, or how long it takes. I'm going to bring him back."

* * *

"I'm sorry, but he's gone. And he isn't coming back."

Oliver shook his head, "Then I'm screwed!" He started to pace back and forth. "I don't have the best track record. I don't always walk the straight and narrow. Clark's the one I count on to keep me on the right path. He's the one that pulls me back before I go to far. What am I supposed to do? How the hell am I supposed to be the hero I want to be?"

J'onn stopped Oliver in his steps, placing his hands on his shoulders.

"The League is a living, breathing thing. And sometimes, it too changes. In all ways but one. Old heroes may fade, but the League _never_ dies. So even in Clark's death, we must stand, for nothing has changed. We still have a job to do. You still have a job to do," added J'onn. "The League needs you, Oliver."

Oliver took a ragged breath. "But what if-"

"I can see inside your mind, Oliver. I know what you are capable of. Clark didn't stand by you because he needed to keep you on the right path. He stood by you because he respected you as the hero and leader you are. You can be the hero that you want to be. I know because Clark believed you could be, rightfully so. We have to make this work."

* * *

"It's not working. At least not like it should be."

"What do you mean?"

Hal hung his head, "The ring is powered by willpower, Tess. But...seeing Clark...of all people...broken like that. What hope do I have? What hope do any of us have? Even Clark couldn't survive that darkness..."

Tess didn't know what to say. Her jaw slacked and hung open. Hal was, well, one of the most confident people she knew and to see him like this... She was certainly speechless, which was saying something.

"Sinestro employs fear against the Green Lanterns. And I've been able to overcome it-"

"Because you've accepted fear, and overcome it."

Hal nodded. "But now...after seeing Superman fall...I can't help but feel fear again. I can't help but fear what is in store for the world without Superman in it. It's like my willpower is being sapped away by my fear..."

* * *

Suddenly, Bart burst through the door with a look of panic was stricken across his face, "Clark's tomb was broken into."

Shock was evident across their faces. "What?"

"His body is missing."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? This was my attempt to try something a little artsy if you will with having each section kind of connect via the dialogue or something, haha. I don't know, I just got the idea and ran with it.

Anyways, I hope you liked it! Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _the Birds and the Bees_.


	186. the Birds and the Bees

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 with the idea coming from our very own, _**Lilbit4**_!

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Chollie, mentions of Jo'an/Boy from school

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #186, the Birds and the Bees

**Author's Note: **Well, I think we all know where this is going, hahaha. Enjoy!

* * *

"I'm not doing it."

Lois let out a chuckle, "Uh, well, I'm definitely not doing it."

Clark gave her a pained look. "Why not? You're a girl. She will be more comfortable with a girl."

"What about Ollie?"

"What?" asked a shocked Oliver.

Lois rolled her eyes, "Look at his hair, he's practically a girl anyways!"

He looked at her with a frown, then at Ollie, then back at her. "Oliver is not talking to my daughter about sex."

"What? Why do we keep him around then if we're not going use him for the crap we don't want to do?"

"Ok. I'm like..._really_ offended right now," quipped Oliver.

Clark rolled his eyes, "What about-"

"If you say Bozo, I will stab you in the face."

"I was going to say Chloe. Or Kara? Or Dinah? Or Diana? Or-"

Oliver chuckled. "Are you just naming all the women in the League?"

Clark looked away with a red tinge in his cheeks, "No..." Lois gave him a look. "I wasn't going to name _all_ of them! What? I wasn't! I don't want Zatanna talking to my baby about sex."

"Good call," agreed Ollie.

"Definitely not," seconded Lois.

Clark let out a deep sigh, "Why do we have to tell her anyways?"

Lois tilted her head, "What? So some boy can let her in on the big secret and then offer to show her hows it done?"

He groaned, "Can't we just tell lie to her or something?"

"Because that's always a good idea," quipped Ollie.

Lois nodded, "You want us to lie to our daughter about sex?"

"Not lie exactly, just tell her like... I don't know, that it's something you learn after you are married or something. That they teach her how to do after the wedding."

"They teach her after the wedding? Who is they?" asked a thoroughly confused Lois.

Clark rolled his eyes, "I don't know! I just don't want her having sex until she is married!"

Oliver decided to poke the bear, "You two had sex before you were married."

Lois turned on Ollie like he was the last maple doughnut on the face of the Earth. "You... are _never..._ going to tell my daughter... that I had s-e-x before I was married, you understand?"

"You know she knows how to spell, right?" he smirked.

Clark threw his hands in the air, "Why don't we just enroll her in nun school?"

Lois nodded, "You're onto something, Smallville."

"Why do you guys even have to have this talk with her?"

"Because she came home today with her hands glued to her phone, Ollie. That's why." He shook his head in confusion, causing Lois to sigh dramatically. "A _boy_, you idiot! She was texting a _boy_!"

He shrugged, "So?"

Lois looked like she wanted to strangle him so she tapped Clark in. "Oliver, don't you remember what you were like when you were in school? Don't you remember how you felt about girls?"

"I went to Excelsior Academy, it was an all boy's school."

"Well, I'm going to cut that story off before you reveal some dark secrets that will make me mighty uncomfortable considering that you're married to my cousin," interrupted Lois. "Look, boys want girls. Their hormones are completely out of control. Take Smallville for instance, he'd check me out nonstop!"

Clark shook his head, "I never did that."

"He'd walk into people and lockers he was so entranced!"

He sighed deeply, "I never did that either."

"And this one time, he totally snuck into my apartment to catch me naked!"

"I wasn't in school then, and I was trying to save you from a serial killer!

She threw her hands into the air, "See! The horny-ness lasts long after they get out of school!

"Lois!"

She stopped him with a hand. "The point is that I can't afford having my baby subjected to the same hormones I saw from this kid," she nodded at Clark, "while I was at Cornfield High!"

"So you want to scare her into never wanting to have sex?"

She sighed in relief, "Finally! It's about friggin'-"

"Oh my god!"

They all turned to see Jo'an standing at the foot of the stairs. "I know what it is! When a Daddy marries a Mommy and they want to make a baby, they make with the hankey pankey and then there's a baby! Don't you even know who I live with? I called Grandma to ask why you two were always making noise in your room!"

Everyone stared at a red faced Lois and Clark.

"I have super-hearing! Gosh!"

She turned and stomped back up the stairs, leaving the adults to stand around awkwardly. Clark's eyes were really wide while Lois held a hand over her mouth looking completely mortified.

Oliver chuckled nervously, "Well that all seemed to get blown out of proportion..."

Lois glared at him and gritted out, "Shut... Up... Ollie..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Lilbit4 had suggested a chapter where Lois and Clark have '_the talk_' with Jo'an and this is what came of it, haha. I thought it would be pretty funny if they get in this huge argument and then Jo'an shows up and is like, "I already know what is going on here!"

Anyways, let me know what you thought and give Lilbit4 some love! Thanks!

**Next Up:** either _the Atom _or_ Metropolis_.


	187. TDOS Pt 5

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k** _- I know right? hahaha. Yeah, I love it when adults spell things out and their kids are like, "we can spell, ya know?" hahaha.

_**Mpj891**_ - Aww, well thanks! It feels good to be back, the holidays were incredibly hectic!

_**Katlynne**_ - Uhuh, whatever you say, dear. Well, as you know, there are three more parts! hahaha. I miss Zatana, i need to write a chapter with her in it soon. Horny like someone I know, eh? hahahaha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, Katlynne told me that you mentioned me in a review and I was like, "I have to write something soon!" hahaha. The holidays just ended up being a million times more hectic than I was expecting them to be and I got caught up in them! hahaha. I hope you had a great christmas and new years!

Well, here is your update! haha. I'm glad that you liked them!

_**Lilbit4**_ - Awwwwww! You're too sweet! Thank you!

_**alexindigo**_ - I missed you guys too! I'm glad that you liked them, and I promise that you will get your steamy chapter one of these days! Before I end this story, there will be an M chapter, i promise! hahaha.

What had you confused? I'd be glad to talk about it, haha. I hope you had a great holiday too!

_**kikibrazilian89**_ - Yeah, kind of comes with the territory, haha. I'm glad you liked it though!

_**cathy03**_ - Thanks! I hope you had a great christmas and new years! Oh, trust me, I know all about hectic lives! I promise that it will all be resolved very soon! haha. I didn't intend for a reference to Flashpoint, but I can see where you could think that. I was more thinking about how Chloe wanted Clark to save Jimmy, and how since they know that Bart time traveled to the present, she was hoping someone could go back and save Clark from Doomsday. I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chlollie, hints of one-sided Chlark

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.**  
**

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #187, the Death of Superman: Part 5

**Author's** **Note:** Sorry that I've been gone for so long! The holidays just got to be insane and I had like zero free time to do anything! hahaha. I did all my christmas shopping on the 24th it was crazy! Anyways, I'm back and highly motivated, I'm hoping to wrap up the Death of Superman before my next little hiatus! Oh, and for those that haven't checked it out already, I highly recommend _**LoisClarkNLove's**_ _Clois Christmas Drabbles 2_! They were amazing!

The finale was supposed to be next, but I got a request to do a chapter that more focused on Chloe, so here it is. I hope you guys like it, and of course, there will be a comedic chapter next! Enjoy!

* * *

"_That_...is not him."

Chloe closed her eyes and sighed, "Lois, I understand-"

"No, you don't. That is not Clark. That is not Smallville."

She looked over at Oliver to try and get some support, but he just swallowed deeply and turned to Lois. "I don't want to think that it's him either, Lois, but you have to admit-"

"I don't have to admit anything, Ollie. I know who my husband is. That thing, isn't him. I don't care how much he looks like him or how much he sounds like him. When that thing touches me, when it looks at me, it's just cold. That's not Clark."

Chloe was starting to getting irritated.

Shortly after Clark's grave had been robbed and his body had gone missing, four men had appeared. Lois had found one of them during her research into Cadmus Labs. It was a boy that appeared to be a clone of Clark. She had even given hima name, calling him Connor Kent and was letting him stay on the farm.

Ollie had run into a man calling himself Steel, wrapped in metal with a thunderous mallet. Steel had been trying to clean up his section of the city, proving enough to Oliver to convince him that he was there to do good.

A mysterious man with blinders on. He looked like Clark, but had refused to speak or interact with anyone who had gotten even remotely close. He would fly in and help, and be gone before anyone could get close.

But none of these were the cause of friction between Chloe and Lois.

No, there was another Superman-like character in the spotlight. One who didn't seem to have any interest in playing the nice guy role that Clark had been so keen on. He had used excessive violence, didn't care to work alongside law enforcement, and even accused the Justice League of being vigilantes.

"Look, you didn't see him, Lois. You didn't seem Clark when you disappeared way back when. I have seen what Clark is capable of being when he shuts off his human side. He can be _that_ cold," shouted Chloe.

Silence fell over Watchtower. Both Oliver and Lois were shocked to hear Chloe's words.

"The last time he went up against Doomsday, he felt so guilty for the lives that were lost, that he turned on all of us. He wasn't that far from what we're seeing now, and the body count was a fraction of what it was this time."

Lois began to snarl, "Don't you _dare_ say that Smallville could ever be like this!"

Chloe shook her head, "You aren't the end all, be all on Clark Kent, Lois!"

"I hate to break the news to you, Cuz, but neither are you! I know you think that you have known him the longest and that you know all of his little deep dark secrets, but I know that man through and through, and that isn't him!"

"You-"

"No! You just want him back so bad that you would accept this fake Superman! I know that you miss him! We all do! I know that you love him! But just because you're ready to jump into some fantasy to get him back, don't expect the rest of us to follow you! Clark Kent is a good man who cares about people, that thing doesn't care who it hurts!"

Chloe twisted up her face in anger, "Who it hurts? Talk about fantasy? Just because this Superman doesn't seem to be jumping through hoops for an interview with Lois Lane, you're going to assume that it's not Clark?"

Lois went to jump at Chloe when Oliver stepped between them, "Hey! Stop it you two!"

"I had to pull him back from the edge the last time, I can do it again!" screamed Chloe.

The brunette was enraged, "Is this really about getting your favorite hero back, Chloe? Is it?"

Chloe's jaw hung with slack while Oliver's brow furrowed.

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about, Lois," she snarled.

Lois laughed hollowly, "I don't? We both know the truth about this one! I bet you'd give anything to have him float on down here and ask for the Clark Kent 101 class, wouldn't you, Cuz?"

"Stop it! Both of you!" bellowed Oliver, causing both of them to stop yelling and look at him. "You both want Clark back, I want Clark back. But the truth, is that we don't know anything yet. And we're not going to find anything out if we keep fighting. When it comes to uncovering a story, nobody is better than you two. We need to work together."

Both Lois and Chloe glared at each other before looking back to Oliver.

He looked at Chloe for a moment, "If it is Clark, we've got to get through to him. Everything he is doing is destroying his reputation. They're going to turn on him, we can't let that happen."

He looked over at Lois, who was annoyed that Ollie was even entertaining the thought. "If it's not? We have to stop him before this gets out of hand. We can't let him destroy Clark's memory. We can't let him turn Superman's name into something like that, we have to preserve the hero that Clark was."

The two cousins nodded, accepting their respective missions, but both knew that there would be a time and a place to discuss what was said. Whatever was going on, it was ripping the team apart.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? I know some of you might be upset with how Chloe was portrayed, but I didn't mean for it to be negative, just that Chloe desperately misses Clark and without their rock, the team is really starting to get torn apart. Lois and Chloe are just terribly hurt by their losses right now, they will make up as you know.

A side note, I can't honestly say it was intended, but I can't help but feel like this could be part of what leads to Oliver and Chloe breaking up as we know that they do. For those of you that have been around for the long hall, we know that Ollie and Chloe break up, causing them to date Dinah and Bruce respectively before getting together. Just a side note.

Anyways, I hope you liked it! Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _The Atom_.


	188. The Atom

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #188, the Atom

**Author's Note: **And as usual, here is the chapter to sooth your woes after the Death of Superman update! Enjoy!

* * *

"I heard you had a cold, figured I'd bring you some soup."

Oliver eyed the ..._soup_... with caution. "Uh...what's in it?"

Lois shrugged.

"Wow, that gives me confidence. Umm, actually Ray has been really helping me out."

"Ray? Who's Ray?"

"That would be me."

Lois looked around for the voice, "Who said-"

"I'm down here."

She looked down and jumped up in shock. "There's a little man on the counter!"

"Hey! He isn't a little man, he's a normal man capable of shrinking himself down to subatomic levels."

She frowned, giving Oliver a '_what the hell are you talking about?_' face. Oliver gave her a pointed look and she rolled her eyes before giving Ray an apologetic look, "I'm sorry I called you a little man."

Ray shrugged, "It's ok, I'm used to the whole weird size thing. At least you didn't step on me or something. You can't imagine how often that happens. There was a time that Doc Mid-Nite's Owl thought that I was a mouse and-"

"I don't think I want to know," she held up a hand. "And how exactly is he helping?"

Oliver made a nervous face, "Uh..."

"You want me to re-enter your skull and go another twelve rounds with your sinuses, 'cause I'm game."

Lois closed her eyes, "That is _so_ gross."

He gave her another pointed look and nodded at the soup, "And this isn't?"

"Hey, Clark enjoys my soup every time he gets sick," Oliver gave her a funny look, "which, I admit, isn't often, but he does hang out in an Ice Fortress, and so there is the rare occasion."

"Uhuh, I remember the last time he got '_sick_', it was conveniently the last time I invited you guys over for chili."

Lois rolled her eyes, "Oliver, you don't make chili. You mix ground beef with lava and sprinkle crackers on top. Not even Hal has the _willpower_ to choke down that bowl of napalm that you call chili."

Oliver glared. "Because your cooking is so great?"

"As a matter of fact, Clark loves my cooking, isn't that right, Honey?" she asked as Clark walked in the door.

Clark raised his eyebrow, "Huh?"

Oliver smirked something fierce, "Lois here was just telling us about how much you love her cooking, like this uh...soup...for instance. She says you sure enjoy it when you're sick, Pal."

His eyes shifted back and forth from a '_watch what you say_' glaring Lois to a smirking Oliver.

"Uh..." he started nervously. "It's uh, it's delicious... of course,... Honey," he smiled at Lois goofily.

Lois turned and smirked victoriously at Oliver, who looked unconvinced. "Really? What's in it?"

"What?" asked a stumped Clark.

"If you love it so much, what's in it. Surely you take the time to savor every bite, right?"

it was one of those rare times that Clark Kent sweated. "There's uh... Well, uh... there's water."

"Mhmm, that's kind of the basis for all soups. What else?"

Lois was looking at Clark intently. This was a double whammy for her. First off, she couldn't lose to Ollie. He would go on and on about it for weeks. Secondly, she slaved over this soup, Clark better have liked it.

"Ummm, well uh... there's uh, there, theres noodles. There's noodles in there."

Ollie made a dramatic face, "No way! Noodles? In soup? That's bold, Lois. That's really bold."

Clark nodded, gulping in the process, "Uhuh."

"Well, I know, hey, why don't you have some then, Big Guy? I'm feeling better anyways, and it really shouldn't go to waste. That would be such a shame, don't you think? For this uh... _soup_... to go to waste?"

A wide eyed look is all that Clark had to offer, Lois nudged him towards the soup. "Yeah, Smallville. If Ollie is too good for my soup, you should show him what he is missing out on!"

"Uh... I just ate though... so uh..."

Lois furrowed her brow, "When did you eat? We've been together all day."

"Yeah, Clarkie, what did you have? You chow down in the two minutes you were apart from Legs here while she brought me this bowl of hell?" grinned Oliver, he was having far too much fun.

He glanced at the two of them nervously, "I uh... I had a cracker. It was under the seat..."

Lois made a disgusted face, but Ollie didn't miss a beat. "Crackers, soup, they go together perfectly! Eat up!"

Ollie extended the soup out to Clark, who took it with fear in his eyes. Clark scooped some of it into the spoon, casting a nervous smile at a nodding Lois. Oliver got out his phone to take pictures.

Slowly sliding the spoon into his mouth, Oliver was literally dancing. Clark felt it hit his tongue, causing him to shiver at the flavor currently assaulting his taste buds. Tears poured down his face as he mumbled, "...so 'ood."

Ollie slouched and put away his phone, disappointed that there weren't more fireworks.

Lois kissed his cheek and whispered into his ear, "Good boy. Now that I don't have to kill you, Jo'an is so going to visit your mom as soon as we get home. And uh... you know what that means, _jolly good boy_."

At the sound of her british accent, Clark began to wolf down the soup at a dizzying pace.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? You know what that british accent means! hahaha. As you all know by now, I've been trying to work in other heroes that didn't appear on Smallville and the Atom is a fan favorite so it felt pretty natural to bring him in. The thing they most offer is an opportunity to write chapters and just have them appear for a second so that I have a chapter title that fits the current style, haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it, let me know what you think!

**Next Up:** Since _the Death of Superman_ chapters are written and ready to post, I'll post one of them next along with another comedic chapter. I think it will be _Metropolis_, but no promises!


	189. TDOS Pt 6

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - I just kind of picture Lois grabbing random things off the shelf and dumping them in the pot, hahaha. I dunno what they're going to get up to, haha. What might that british accent imply? hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, she's certainly got me on a leash! hahaha. Well, you'll find out in this one! Lois certainly does, and Connor is going to get a little more time in the spotlight for the next few chapters just because I've been addicted to Young Justice lately, so he is fresh in my mind, haha. He is a great character to write given where our Clois is in this story.

I'm glad that you liked the Atom, haha. He is a really interesting character, and that sinus line is an actual quote from the comics, haha. Hopefully you'll have as much fun with this chapter an M'gann M'orzz in the next! Thanks!

_**Mpj891**_ - Thank you! I'm glad you thought so!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, it wasn't intended when I started writing the chapter, or even as I wrote it, but when I went back to read it over again, I found myself thinking, "this could totally lead to their break up." I think it's safe to say he'd do whatever it took to get himself a little something something from ole Ms. Lane, hahaha.

_**malvill**_ - Haha, I'm glad you liked that bit!

_**Lilbit4**_ - Me neither! haha. Really? I'll make sure to check it out!

_**cathy03**_ - It's all good, haha. Yeah, Chloe is a great character and all, but I really see her as the kind of character that would struggle watching Lois and Clark because of her own personal relationship with Clark. I think that will always be an issue in a lot of ways, and it's hard for me to imagine this kind of situation not coming to a head like this.

Yup, haha. Ray Palmer is one of the truly underrated characters out there. I always hear about the supposed Ant-man moving that might come out, which is basically Marvel's Atom, and wonder why Ray doesn't get any love.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.**  
**

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #189, the Death of Superman: Part 6

**Author's Note: **This is the second to last part of the arc, hopefully you guys like it! Enjoy

* * *

He blinked his eyes open, "Wha...Wher..."

"Careful, Kal-El...You have been in the regeneration-matrix, you are not completely healed," a voice called.

Clark tried his best to see, but the light was blinding and he couldn't focus. After a few moments, he could see a dark mass hovering over him. He blinked his eyes several times, but he was unable to make-out much more than that.

After a few moments, his eyes started to clear. He saw...he saw himself staring back at him.

Immediately, Clark began to push himself backwards and away from his doppelganger. It had a larger version of his shield and yellow sunglasses, he stopped when he ran into a large piece of ice. He turned to realize that he was in the Fortress of Solitude, his home away from Smallville and Metropolis.

"I am sorry, Kal-El," the copy had said. It immediately transformed it's appearance, Clark would later think of it similarly to the way that Brainiac transformed from one appearance to another. It wore red robes, the House of El crest still bright against it's chest, which it's head took on a hooded appearance.

The being bowed to Clark. "I mean, you no harm. I have been maintaining your appearance in your absence."

Clark grimaced as he sat up, mindful of it's motions, "Who are you? _What_ are you?"

It stood, and Clark was almost certain that it was frowning. The being was frowning like it was recalling a past that it wasn't proud of. "I was created by an ancient race, one that wished to preserve the culture of the universe. Upon my arrival on Krypton, a militant named Kem-L was able to capture and corrupt my primary objectives."

"What did he make you do?"

"I wiped out all but his ideal kryptonian culture. For these actions, the Kryptonian people called me the Eradicator."

Clark eyed the machine carefully, "But you saved me..."

The machine nodded. "A scientist named Jor-El, your father, captured me and reprogrammed my main primary-objectives to collect information about the known twenty-eight galaxies. I was later left on Earth for you in the Kawatche Caves until merged with-"

"The Stones of Power," whispered Clark.

It nodded, "Together, the Crystal of Knowledge contained all of it's information, as well as your father's artificial intelligence. The manifestation of these two intelligences resulted in your Fortress of Solitude. Therefore, I am an extension of the Fortress."

Clark thought on that for a few moments.

"Your connection to this place is great, and when your life was in peril, I acted. The humans know a great deal of you and your heritage, Kal-El, but they lacked the knowledge to save you."

"Why?"

Once again, it frowned.

"I was required to save you, Kal-El. You are the last of the House of El."

Clark frowned, "Kara is a member of the House of El. She is just as much part of that family as I am."

The machine rephrased the statement, "You are the last male of the House of El. Only you can carry on the name."

Clark rolled his eyes, "Obviously you haven't met my wife."

It ignored him. "I'm waking you earlier than intended because your city is in danger, Kal-El."

_**Metropolis. . . .**_

Connor grunted as he pulled himself and his fellow hero to safety, shielding them from the Cyborg Superman. Connor ripped away the mask of the man wrapped in steel, finding a man inside looking more wary by the second.

"We tried, Kid... we tried..." he whispered.

Shaking his head, Connor tried to prop the man up. "Who are you? Why, why are you helping us?"

There was a loud crash that made Connor worry about the girl who had shown up to help. She was dressed like Superman with flowing blonde hair, he had to believe she was associated with him somehow.

"My name," started the man before having to groan in pain. "My name is John Henry Irons. We tried..."

He passed out in Connor's arms quickly after. Connor could tell that the man was still alive, so he looked out to see the girl fighting against the machine. Half of it's face was torn away, leaving a horrific metal skull to clash what was left of the skin that had looked so convincingly like Superman. Connor wasn't sure what to do, or how he got here.

The Cyborg had killed a gang earlier that day, prompting this Man of Steel to confront him. When it became clear that the Cyborg was too much for him, Lois had urged Connor to enter the fray.

"_You have to help! You have to do something, you're the only one that can!_" she had pleaded. But Connor was scared. He wasn't a hero, no matter how much he looked like the one that the city had counted on. Lois Lane wouldn't go down without a fight though. "_You look at me, dammit! You have to save them! You have to make a difference!_"

He turned away, "_What am I supposed to do, Lois? How am I supposed to make a difference?_"

Her voice chilled him even now. "_What would Superman do?_"

In that moment, he found himself asking that same question yet again. And he knew the answer. He stood up and looked out to see the Cyborg standing over the woman, who was clearly hurt. He started to run.

'_Superman died to protect this city. To make a difference. I have to save them, I have to make a difference_,' he told himself as he neared the Cyborg. '_And if I have to die to make that happen... So be it_.'

He collided with the Cyborg at the last second, taking him to the ground before he could deliver a finishing blow to the woman laying at his feet. They quickly got to their feet and Connor delivered blow after blow. At first, he actually had the Cyborg back peddling. Connor wailed on the machine, crunching the metal around his ribs.

But then the Cyborg caught a fist. And then he caught the other. And with a swift kick, Connor was bouncing down the street and crushing cars in his path. "You didn't really think you could defeat me, did you?"

Connor looked up to see him floating down in front of him. "I'm going to try!"

He jumped up, trying pounce on the Cyborg, only to be smacked back down as if he were but a mere child. "I have defeated the so called Man of Steel and Supergirl, Boy. Your attempt was futile."

"I can live with that."

The Cyborg began to lift a large boulder over his head, casting a shadow down on Connor. "I'm afraid you won't."

Connor closed his eyes, but the flash of light made him open them.

When he opened them, he saw a man standing over the Cyborg. In his fist, sparking like crazy, was a bundle of electrical cords and crushed metal. Connor looked over to see the Cyborg laying on the ground, it's chest ripped open.

The light shined around his face, making it difficult to see who it was. Connor narrowed his eyes, "Am I dead?"

"What? Why would you think that?" asked the Man.

Connor furrowed his brow, "Because you're supposed to be dead. And if I'm seeing dead people, I must be dead."

The Man held out his hand to help him up, but he then noticed that Connor had passed out. Hoisting Connor up and over his shoulder, the Man knelt down as he prepared to take off into the skies.

"Nobody dies today," replied Superman.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? It led into Chapter 36's _Doomsday_ there at the end, I told you it'd all come together! haha. I wrote the second half because some people were wondering what role the Reign of Supermen would play in my story, and you see all four of the "Supermen" that appeared after Clark's death in this chapter. Hopefully it worked.

Also, I know that the Eradicator had a different kind of role in the comics, but I made it work for this story. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it, can't wait to hear what you thought about Clark's big return!

**Next Up:** M'gann M'orzz


	190. M'gann

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Cassie/Connor, M'gann/Connor

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #190, M'gann M'orzz

**Author's Note: **So, I've been kind of addicted to Young Justice lately, finally found a site where I could watch them, and I was just itching to write a chapter like this. Hopefully you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

"Wait, so you and Cassie broke up?"

Connor shrugged, "We just weren't clicking anymore, she's always on Paradise Island and it's kind of awkward for me to be there when I'm the only guy on the island. I don't think they like men very much..."

Clark nodded to himself, '_It is pretty intimidating..._'

"It was just a whole lot more kill than kiss, if you know what I mean? Besides, Tim has a thing for her anyways, it's fine."

He put his arm around Connor's shoulder, "I'm sorry, Bud. There's plenty of fish in the sea, you'll-"

**_CRASH!_**

They looked up to see J'onn J'onzz standing in the doorway to the Kent House. "Help me, Clark Kent. You're my only hope."

"J'onn? What's wrong? Are you ok?"

The Martian shook his head slowly, "I... I... I have a..."

Both Clark and Connor exchanged looks, Lois and Zatanna had even come in from the kitchen to see what the commotion was all about. Jo'an leaned back in her chair from her homework to look. J'onn only looked this scared around fire.

"I have a _niece_."

Confusion set in for the other five people in the room, J'onn was thought to be the last martian alive.

A young girl stepped out from behind him, blushing slightly at their gaze. She couldn't have been much older than Connor, if at all. She had long slowing red hair, pale white skin and freckles. That didn't help the confusion.

"Hello, M'gann!" she whispered shyly. Suddenly, her skin turned green.

Connor's eyes grew big, "Hello, _Red_."

Clark turned and gave him a disapproving look, muttering to himself, "I need to stop letting you hang out with Oliver."

Zatanna nudged Lois, "Really? It's the green skin that does it for him? Been making the kid watch Star Trek, Lo?"

Lois just glared at her in response. Jo'an simply rolled her eyes and got up from the table, "Ugh."

"What's wrong with you, Junior?" asked Lois.

Jo'an tilted her head and put a hand on her hip. "Now Connor is going to start with the hanky panky. Between that and you and Dad, I'm never going to get any peace and quiet around here!"

Lois blushed a deep crimson, Zatanna fell to the floor laughing uncontrollably. "Shut your face, Zee!"

"Wait, I thought you were the only martian left besides a handful of white martians?" Clark didn't miss the look that J'onn and M'gann shared. "And why exactly are you coming to me for help?"

J'onn spoke to Clark telepathically, "_Perhaps this is a discussion best had in private._"

Clark nodded, "Connor, why don't you introduce M'gann, did I pronounce that right?" she nodded shyly. "Why don't you introduce her to Lois and Zatanna, we're going to have a conversation in the loft."

Connor nodded enthusiastically, "No problem, I can do that, sure, whatever you need, I'm your man."

"Tone it down, Buddy," quipped Clark as he patted Connor on the back and followed J'onn outside.

As they walked up the stairs to the loft, Clark caught a look at J'onn. He didn't need telepathy to know that J'onn was more than a little nervous. When they reached the top, Clark spoke. "M'gann isn't really your niece, is she?"

"She is not. When the White Martians massacred the Green Martians, her parents put her in a rocket and sent her away to a nearby system. She recently learned of my survival on Earth and sought me out."

Clark gave him a knowing look, "Why do I get the feeling that this isn't the whole story?"

J'onn actually turned a paler color of green. "She isn't what she seems, Kal-El."

"What do you mean?"

He composed his expression, "M'gann is using her shape-shifting abilities to hide the truth. The truth is... I am the last of the Green Martians. I have told her to change her appearance to hide the fact that she is a White Martian."

Shock set in for Clark, "But... you told me that the White Martians were murderers, you told me that-"

"I know. It was a shock for myself as well. But M'gann is different. She does not seek war as they did. Her parents were on the Green Martian's side. They sent her away out of fear of what the White Martians would do to them as they would be seen as traitors. M'gann wants to live a full life, and use her powers for good. I hope you can understand."

Clark took it all in. "And you came to me for help because-"

"Because I have no idea how to raise a teenager, Kal-El. You have done so well with Connor and Jo'an, I have been alone for so long that I do not know where to begin. I need your guidance and your wisdom."

He wanted to snort, '_Wisdom? Can't wait to hear what Lois has to say about that._'

"Well, I do understand, J'onn. I'll be the first one to admit that your blood doesn't condemn you. And I'd be glad to help you with this. Once she gets comfortable here, she will be fine. In fact, I think I have an idea," grinned Clark.

J'onn frowned, "What kind of idea?"

_**to be continued. . . .**_

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, what did you think? Like I said before, I've been addicted to Young Justice lately. And since in the New 52, it looks like Cassie (Wonder Girl) is going to be hooking up with Tim Drake (Red Robin), I figured it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world to introduce one of my favorite characters from the show as a Connor Kent love interest!

Plus, it's always fun to bring in new characters. There will be a sequel to this called _Miss Martian_ that takes off when the four of these guys split up and we follow Connor and M'gann and find out what Clark's big ole idea was, so look out for that!

Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Maybe it will actually be _Metropolis_ this time? hahaha.


	191. TDOS Pt 7, the Finale

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - Mhmm, haha. I'm glad that you liked that bit, it was one of my favorite parts. I know right? I flinched everytime they said it like that! hahaha. Oliver just makes everybody a horndog, ;) hahahaha. Connor is so gunna be whipped, just like Clark, haha.

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! Who doesn't love the Clois family? haha. They're the best!

_**cathy03**_ - _the Death of Superman_ was one of the first comics I ever bought! haha. But even now, I had to go back and re-read it and do some research, haha. I always worry that someone might call me out if I write something wrong, haha. I didn't think I'd like her, but she has really grown on me, haha. Plus I'm a sucker for a red-head, hahaha. I do like Artemis, but I think she's the mole!

I honestly don't know, hahaha. Maybe nine or ten? Whatever age she is, she is far too mature for it, haha. And I get that alot about the second (or third, fourth, fifth, sixth, haha) kid, but how can I give another kid time in the spotlight when Jo'an is so awesome? haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you approve! haha. Well, here is the big finale for ya! haha. No Mrs. Kent planned, but I think you'll like what he has in mind all the same, haha. Oh, believe me, there's still a ton of characters to introduce! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - He was a villain, but he isn't one, it's kind of confusing, haha. The Eradicator basically created the Fortress of Solitude in the comics when Clark threw him into the arctic, but was always trying to turn Clark into the "ideal" Kryptonian. Eventually, Clark threw him into the sun, and he came back as an energy spirit or something and tried to take over Clark's body when "died" but ended up building a body and using Superman's recovery to power him. He is supposed to be a good guy now though.

I'm planning a chapter with Chris Kent very soon, so that shouldn't be a problem. The problem with a second Clois child is, how do I take the spotlight from Jo'an? haha. It's hard to imagine writing another child as well received as Jo'an is! haha.

_**milkshake42**_ - I'm glad that you liked them so far! I look forward to hearing what you think about the other chapters as well!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.**  
**

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #191, the Death of Superman: Part 7 (the Finale)

**Author's Note: **So, here is the finale, hopefully some of you recognize something in this first part! Enjoy!

* * *

Clark let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding as the elevator doors opened. He had dropped the unconscious boy that helped Kara against the Cyborg off at the Farm, not sure who he was or where he came from. He figured that Lois would know.

He made his way towards the newsroom, reporters stopped and stared as he walked past them. He was sure that there were gasps and whispers, but he couldn't hear them over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears as he looked into the newsroom and saw her standing there at Jimmy's desk. He thought he saw her wipe her eye.

He took a deep breath and walked down the center aisle, he came to a halt when she turned and gasped.

It broke his heart to see how worn she looked. He could only imagine what he would have done in her shoes. There were the days when she disappeared to the future, but those were days when they were barely a couple. He couldn't imagine his life without her in it after all this time.

"Is it...are you really..." she started.

He stepped closer, "It's really me, Lois. I'm so sorry that I ever left."

She stared at him, and he knew she was trying to tell for sure that he wasn't some imagination. She reached up to pull his glasses away from his face, and he trembled under her touch. Once they were off, it was like she knew it was him. But instead of kissing him-

_**WHACK!**_

He reeled back to keep up appearances, but they both knew the punch didn't actually hurt him. He rubbed his cheek and looked back up at her, a small smile playing on his face. He knew what was going to come next, and he prepared himself for her to throw herself into his arms.

Their kiss made up every second that he was gone.

Lois showed how much she missed him. Clark showed how sorry he was. When she came up for air, she gave him a strong look. The kind of look that said that these next few words were going to be important and he better listen up.

"Don't _ever_ leave me again."

He almost laughed, "I won't."

They were quickly tangled up in a warm embrace when Perry White came rushing over, "Kent!"

Jumping at his shout, they both turned to look at their editor-in-chief. They were surprised to find a look not often found on Perry White's face: happiness. "Kent, son, you're back? What happened to you? We thought you were dead!"

Clark chuckled lightly as Lois squeezed his hand, "I got caught up in the action, Sir. I got hurt. The hospitals in the city were full, they sent some of the overflow to Central City and Gotham, I ended up in Smallville."

"Smallville? Why didn't you give us a call, Son? Your wife has been worried sick!"

He gave Lois a guilty look before turning back to Perry, "I had amnesia, Sir. It wasn't until I saw the news about Superman that I remembered who I was, that I was a reporter for the Daily Planet. It all came back in this rush."

Perry was flabbergasted, "Great Cesar's Ghost, Son. And nobody recognized you? I thought you were like the Elvis of that town, Clark?"

Lois chuckled.

"You'd be surprised how often people don't recognize him, Chief. I guess he just has one of those faces," she grinned as she straightened his glasses before returning her hand to his. Needless to say, her hand wouldn't be letting go again for a good long while.

_**later that night. . . .**_

"_Superman officially returned to Metropolis today, putting an end to the vicious reign of what people are calling the Cyborg Superman. The Man of Steel was originally thought to be dead after a horrific battle with the creature known only as Doomsday mere weeks ago that shocked the world_," chimed the television reporter.

The only other sound in the office was the cracking of pool balls. He continued to play until the smallest crinkle formed across his brow line, he paused to sip his scotch. He didn't even turn around. "So you're back."

Clark walked through the glass doors, open as if Lex was expecting a visitor to drift down from the sky. "I am."

"I hope you'll forgive me, but they were all sold out of balloons, Seems the Daily Planet beat me to it," he smirked as he turned. "Tell me, are you a cockroach? I thought it was me, but you really do seem incapable of being killed."

A smile played across his face, "Something like that."

Lex gave him his patented eyebrow raised nod, "Something like that."

"Look, I wanted to come and thank-"

"Dont," stopped Lex. "I did what I did because the world needed it to be done. If you couldn't beat it, that thing would have killed the rest of us and then who would I make money off of?"

Clark's expression never changed. "Thank you, Lex."

Looking away with a sigh, Lex shook his head for a moment. "Don't think this means I'm going to take it easy on you."

"Never thought you would."

Turning back towards the doorway, Clark was readying to take off into the skies. "Clark!" He turned back to see Lex giving him a serious look. "Just know that when you die for real? It's going to with my hands around your neck."

Clark stared for a second before a ghost of a smirk formed, "We'll agree to disagree."

A slight wind whipped inwards from the balcony as Superman shot into the sky. Standing there, Lex couldn't help but smirk at his nemesis and his quip. He shook his head for a moment before turning back to the pool table.

'_So the legend continues... Game on._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? That first part is Chapter 36's Doomsday from Clark's POV plus a little extra at the end there, I hope you guys liked it! Also, a lot of people wanted to know if Lex was going to be good after his previous chapter, so I wanted to make sure that we made it clear that he would still be the big bad Lex Luthor was know and... _love_? haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys like it, and the next chapter serves as kind of an epilogue of sorts.

**Next Up:** _Dubbilex_.


	192. Dubbilex

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #192, Dubbilex

**Author's Note: **I'm sure some of you are wondering what Connor's fate would be post-TDOS, so I wrote this chapter. It also serves as kind of a "_how Connor met Clark_" type deal beyond the little moment they had in TDOS. Hope you like it! Enjoy!

* * *

Connor's eyes flickered open as her heard the creaking of the stairs, he turned his head to see who it was, '_I must be dreaming..._'

"I see you're up."

He sat up on the couch, his makeshift bed of sorts since Lois had offered for him to live on the farm. He already felt like he was intruding into her life enough without setting up camp in the house, so he wanted to stay in the loft.

Pulling a chair to sit across from him, Clark sat down. "How are you feeling?"

Connor looked around nervously, "Fine. A little confused."

"About how I'm here?"

He nodded.

Clark sighed softly. "I don't really know either. I'm told that because of what I am, a Kryptonian, that things aren't like they are with humans and I still had energy in my body. Enough to fix whatever was wrong if I was exposed to enough sunlight, which I'm sure you know by now gives me my powers. I was put into a regeneration matrix, which was like a cage of sunlight."

Connor nodded with wide eyes, "Right. A cage of sunlight."

Clark chuckled, "Don't worry, I know how crazy it sounds. All I really know is that I'm here. I think we both of some crazy pasts."

They sat there for a moment in awkward silence, not really sure what the other was thinking. Connor was wondering what his future had in store for him now that Clark was back, while Clark tried to figure out how best to start the conversation he came to have.

"Look, I know that Lois has already inducted you into the family and given you a name," started Clark.

Connor let his head hang a little bit. He had a feeling about where this was going. Clark was going to tell him that he wasn't a real part of this family. That he would have to find his own home. He was going to be alone again.

"But I want you to hear it from me too that you're part of this family now." His head shot up at Clark's words, a grin slowly forming across his face. "My Kryptonian name is Kal-El, Supergirl's name is Kara Zor-El. If you are going to be a part of this family, I thought that Kon-El would be a fitting name for you, given the name that Lois gave you."

That slowly forming grin burst into a full on ear-to-ear smile, "Kon-El... I like that. Thank you."

Clark grinned in a way that Lois would have called Jonathan Kent-like. "You're welcome. But I hope you know that being part of this family comes with rules too. Wearing that symbol on your chest is more than a fashion choice."

Connor nodded, eager to hang on Clark's every word.

"Being part of this family means you stand for something. You stand for truth, and justice. We stand by the law, not supersede it. You will go to school here in Smallville, and even though you clearly have an aptitude for it, you will be trained to be a hero if you're going to choose that path. Do you think you are up for that?"

"I won't let you down, Clark. When can we start?"

Connor's eagerness made him smile, "I have a few friends. Green Arrow, Batman, and Wonder Woman. They'll help us. Part of being a great hero is being able to admit that you don't always have the answers. What I can't teach you, they can. And Batman has a protégé that I think would be very beneficial for you to meet. I think you two would hit it off."

If possible, his grin got bigger. "Like a friend?"

"Yeah, like a friend."

Before Connor could say another word, they could hear yelling from the house.

"Uh...Smallville? I think the Devil is in our living room!"

Clark and Connor exchanged looks, both hurrying down the stairs of the loft and into the house. Connor noted how Clark's brow furrowed as he prepared himself for whatever was waiting for him inside. Connor did his best to match it.

"Ok, if this is about the pre-marital sex? It's not my fault. He wears _tights_."

They rushed into the living room to see Lois standing there talking to what looked like, well, the Devil. Standing in the center of the room was a tall, grey creature. It had two yellowish horns protruding from it's brow, and wearing a white lab coat.

"I assure you, Ms. Lane, I am not the Devil."

Clark wasn't sure whether or not that was a relief, "Then who are you?"

"I am called Dubbilex, I am an associate of Project Cadmus and one of their cloning projects."

Connor's face twisted up in fear, "Did you say Cadmus?"

Dubbilex held up his hand, "Do not worry, I said I was an associate of Project Cadmus, not Lex Luthor. I am here because I wished to see how you were assimilating into human life, Superboy."

"My name, is _Connor_," he gritted out.

"I'm sorry. I wished to see how you were doing, Connor."

Lois frowned, "He is doing just fine, Dubs. We happen to be doing just fine, I even baked cupcakes without burning them, so ha."

Clark shook his head slightly for a moment. Connor sniffed slightly, surprised that he didn't smell burnt batter.

"I have attempted cooking as well, it can be most difficult."

"Thank you! Finally someone gets what I'm talking about!"

Dubbilex turned his attention to Connor. "As I was saying, I too am one of the projects from Cadmus. I was created to be a powerful telepath and have been charged with protecting the Project. As you are aware, you are part of the Project, so your well-being is important to me. I understand your desire to live a human life, especially one amongst your genetic template."

Clark and Lois widened their eyes, but Dubbilex raised his hand.

"Do not fear, I will not reveal your secret identity, Superman. I find it remarkable that a pair of glasses have helped you so much. I merely located Connor with the telepathic connection we had during his creation and connected the dots."

A sheepish look formed on Clark's face, Lois glared, "Hey, it's not just glasses. I turned him into a nerd too!"

She flinched as she heard her own words and turned to Clark, cupping his cheeks. "No killing, love you, Honey," she cooed before pecking his lips. Clark rolled his eyes playfully before blushing ever so slightly. Connor and Dubbilex watched with quirked eyebrows.

Clark coughed and talked in a deeper voice, "So, you aren't going to try to take Connor?"

"No. I believe that we all should be able to choose what to do with the life that Cadmus has given us. I merely choose to remain with Cadmus because it is my home. I wish Connor the very best, but if you ever need me, just call out to me with your mind."

Connor nodded, "Thank you." Dubbilex said his goodbyes before exiting through the front door. Connor then turned to them, "So... that has to be the weirdest thing you've ever seen in your living room, huh?"

Lois and Clark broke down in laughter. "Not even close, Kid."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I wanted to do something where Clark meets Connor for real, since we haven't really covered that story yet and it seemed appropriate giving that we just finished _the Death of Superman_. It was also fun to introduce Dubbilex because he is such an unknown character for most people.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it and can't wait to hear what you thought!

**Next Up:** Either _Sinestro_ or _Metropolis_.


	193. Sinestro

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I had to keep the kill to go with the kiss! haha. Yeah, Perry missed his favorite, well, favorite _male_ reporter, haha. It was important that we made sure to show that Lex was still fully intending to be Clark's bad guy. I'm glad you liked the Dubbilex chapter, it was the perfect opportunity to show Clark getting to meet Connor for the first time.

**_LoisClarkNLove_** - You know that it's not Perry with Elvis! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked how it all ended. Yeah, our conversation was one of the things that inspired me to write that chapter. I thought you would like that pre-marital sex bit, hahaha. ;) haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I'm not saying that we'll never see Child #2, just that my mind immediately goes to writing any children scenes with Jo'an, it's the same reason we haven't seen Chloe and Oliver's kid either, haha. I'll see what I can do though, haha. Yeah, I've always found him to be pretty interesting. Young Justice brought my attention back to him, haha.

_**cathy03** _- Exactly! haha. Ummmm, if they're telling the truth about Artemis being a character from the comics, her comic book counterpart is not exactly a good guy, haha. But we'll wait and see, haha. I'm glad you liked the Dubbilex chapter!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing: **mentions of Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #193, Sinesto

**Author's Note:** So, I really liked the Green Lantern movie. Sue me, haha. And I was thinking about how I would do a sequel, and a few ideas popped into my head, and I tweaked them to fit into this chapter. This kind of works as an opportunity to showcase some of the other members of the League, so hopefully you guys like it. Enjoy!

* * *

"You know, we could use a man like you in the corps," offered Ganthet.

Barry smiled nervously, "Thanks but uh...I think I'm going to leave the lanterning up to my buddy, Hal."

He extended the blue power ring out to Ganthet, but leader of the Blue Lantern Corps simply waved his hand.

"Keep it. In case you change your mind."

Nodding, Barry slipping the ring into his pocket and watched as Ganthet took off into the skies with his fellow members of the Blue Lantern Corps. Barry smiled and looked over at Oliver, who was giving him a funny look. "What?"

"You gots a _purty_ ring," teased Oliver in a southern accent.

Barry rolled his eyes and walked away, "Who made you the comedian of the Justice League?"

Ollie trotted off after him, "Who did you think it was going to be? Bruce?"

**_sometime later. . . ._**

Hal knelt in front of Sinestro, one eye refused to open as the pain seared through his face. He glanced back to see J'onn slumped against a wall, Barry's feet and arms bound with yellow energy, and Diana trying her best to break the chains that had formed around her wrists and ankles. Needless to say, his team was in trouble.

'_Why didn't I call Clark? Not even a text?_' he mentally groaned. '_I could have used some backup..._'

The mission was supposed to be simple enough. They received a distress call from a nearby system and Hal had decided to take a small task force with him, but none of them had expected to find the Sinestro Corps waiting for them.

"How many times must I tell you, Jordan? Never challenge those more powerful than you," taunted Sinestro.

Hal barely opened his eye to give his former mentor a fierce glare. "That's still debatable here," he growled.

Sinestro laughed coldly as he hovered. "I have defeated your entire team, Earth-Man. You kneel before me, defeated. Your friends are my prisoners. I don't see how the situation merits any debate."

"There were four of us against all of your Corps."

The leader of the Yellow Lanterns eyed him carefully, "Then let us see for once and for all."

Sinestro turned to one of his men, nodding. The deputy held out his hand, Hal couldn't make out what it was that he held in his palm. Sinestro used his ring to levitate the possession and drop it in front of the Green Lantern.

It was his _ring_.

Hal stared at it for a second. In his state, against Sinestro's yellow impurity powered ring, he was wary of his chances. But then he had an idea. As he knelt down for the ring, '_Can you hear me, J'onn? Are you still there?_'

After a moment, a voice weakly entered his head. '_I am here, Green Lantern._'

'_Think you can manage some telekinesis for me?_'

Sinestro gestured for Hal to put the ring on. "Come on now, Jordan. Let us see who is more powerful." Sliding on the ring, there was a slight glow on the Green Lantern's hand as the ring activated. "Let me hear you say it. Let me hear you say those famous last words. Let me hear you mutter that the Oath, knowing they will be the last words you ever say."

Hal looked up, anger clearly streaked across his face.

"You always had a way with wit, Hal Jordan. You always had to be the humorous one. Now, make me _laugh_."

All this time, Sinestro's glare had been so transfixed on Hal's face that he didn't even notice J'onn slowly acquire the ring from Barry's pocket. J'onn had slowly floated it to Hal's left hand, giving him the chance to slide it on.

"In fearful day, in raging night, with strong hearts full, our souls ignite," started Hal quietly.

Sinestro's face twisted in confusion, "What is this? What is that?"

Blue began to climb up Hal's left arm, "When all seems lost in the War of Light, look to the stars, for hope burns bright!"

Hal's uniform took on a combination of the Green Lantern and Blue Lantern uniform. He flew up at Sinestro, delivering blow after blow, each one causing the yellow energy keeping his friends captive to flicker.

"Don't you know, Sinestro? The Blue Energy is the strongest of all the lights, it only needs the energy of will-power to enact it, and I'll tell you," he grabbed Sinestro by his uniform, "I've got more than enough will-power to kick your ass."

The following blow was enough to sever the ties that had held the rest of the team.

Barry flew past his assailants in a blur, delivering blows to each one of them before they could even tell he had moved. Two of them fell to the ground unconscious as he slowed enough to deliver a final blow to his last attacker.

Using her lasso to restrain the nearest guard, Diana effortlessly flicked him sideways to slam into her oncoming attacker and send them into the wall. Yellow blast beams flew past her head, causing her to spin on her heel and sprint at her last opponent. She deflected the beams away with her bracelets before reaching her target.

Her Amazonian training came in handy here as she traded blows with him, finally putting him down with a spinning kick to the side of his head. Diana wiped blood from her lip and picked up the spear he had dropped.

"Stay down," she growled.

Barry sprinted over to help J'onn to his feet, not realizing that a group of Yellow Lanterns were about to attack him. J'onn quickly phased through Barry and took out the attackers with relative ease.

He turned back to Barry, who was dusting himself off furiously. "Don't. _Ever_. Phase through me. Again."

J'onn gave him an apologetic smile, "I apologize, Flash."

A few moments later, Clark and the rest of the League burst into the chamber to find Hal standing over Sinestro. He was beaten and bloody, but victorious all the same. Diana held a spear out at to the remaining, yet surrendering, members of the Sinestro Corps while J'onn and Barry tied up the unconscious members in the center of the room.

Hal gave Sinestro a look that was beyond fury.

"I don't fear you, Sinestro. And know, that will-power will _always_ overcome fear. Always," he gritted out.

Clark exchanged looks with Bruce, obviously things had gone down here. Before Sinestro could reply, a large blue hand erupted from Hal's ring and knocked the Yellow Lantern out cold. Hal turned to the calvary.

"You're late," he smirked.

"Well, we came to save the day, but apparently you had it well in hand," grinned Clark. "And hey, now I'll be able to make it home in time for dinner and Lois won't kill me."

Oliver rolled his eyes, "Is wittle Clarkie going to get some kissies?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Oliver always has to get the final word in, doesn't he? haha. Well, I enjoyed getting to write some characters that don't get enough attention in this story, and in general.

Obviously Green Lantern has been getting some love with the movie, the animated movies, and the new TV show, but I wish that Martian Manhunter, Wonder Woman, and Flash would get more attention. Hard for me to understand why we're making movies for Jonah Hex and Ghost Rider but not core Justice League members. Rant over, hahaha. Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I know I keep saying it, but _Metropolis_ looks like the most likely from where I'm sitting.


	194. Captain Marvel

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, lately I've been thinking about a Green Lantern story, so I had an itch, haha. I always like to bring in characters who are key members of the JL in the comics but didn't appear on the show like Wonder Woman and Green Lantern, or Captain Marvel in this one, haha. I agree! The different corps is a tremendous area of opportunity for writing because they've all got such amazing backstories! I'm planning on buying a ton of GL comics to really get into it! haha.

During Blackest Night, some characters were chosen as Deputy Members of the respective Lantern Corps. Barry was chosen as the Blue Lantern Deputy, Mera was chosen as the Red Lantern Deputy, Wonder Woman as the Star Sapphire Deputy, the Atom as the Indigo Tribe Deputy, Lex Luthor (if you can believe it, haha) as the Orange Lantern Deputy, and the Scarecrow as the Sinestro Corps Deputy. In the comics, Barry gave it back to Ganthlet I believe, the leader of the Blue Lantern Corps, but I had him keep it here. In my original story, it was a different character who actually is from the Blue Lantern Corps that had it so I tweaked it to give us a character that we were more familiar with, haha.

The thing with the Blue Lantern rings is that you need a Green Lantern ring to power it. While Hope has the most raw power, it requires the Willpower to use it. But yeah, I'm glad that you liked it! haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - I really enjoyed it, though I understand some of the complaints. I had some of my own. I think people are just overly critical of it because the trailers looked so good and a Green Lantern story had so much potential in it.

_**Katlynne**_ - Probably Zack Snyder? hahaha. I'm glad that you liked it! _Metropolis_ just needs an ending! hahaha.

**_cathy03_** - I didn't really mind her, I just wish it would have been more about the Corps and Oa than his human friends and Earth. Kilowog and Sinestro deserved so much more screen time, but I get that they were trying to ground the story so that it could be more accessible for the non-comic book fans. I thought it was pretty solid with a ton of potential for the future.

One of the biggest problems for DC Comics has been that they keep changing the story to make it fit the times that it's made in for extra earning. Superman being gloomy? No, thank you. Green Lantern being a space-cop who spends more time on Earth than in space? No, thank you. And I don't even know how you make Jonah Hex before you make Flash or WW movies.

_**LaLaALa521**_ - Thanks! I'm glad that you're enjoying them!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, hints of Jo'an/Billy

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

******Jo'an Disclaimer:** Jo'an, 'You Make My Daddy Sick' characters, and elements used via permission from mygyps17.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #194, Captain Marvel

**Author's Note: **I introduced _Billy Batson_ in chapter #68, so you might want to check it out for some backstory! Enjoy!

* * *

"Wait, so when you got your powers, the ceiling caved in and killed the Wizard?"

Billy smiled sadly, "Yeah, but he knew that it was going to happen. And I know how to call on him when I need him."

Jo'an leaned on his elbows, her face in her hands. "Amazing..." she sighed.

Across the room, four superheroes sat at the conference table watching the two children talk. Oliver and Bart wore annoyed expressions while Hal kept a close eye on them in case they attacked the boy.

Bruce spun a batarang on the table, "I'm going to have to do something about this."

"Wait, what? It's my job to take care of this! I'm the favorite uncle!" whispered Ollie harshly.

Bart threw his head back, "Not thing again. Guys, seriously. I'm Bobo. This isn't even a contest." Oliver snarled at him while Bruce threw a batarang past Bart that just barely missed his head. "Ha! Missed-"

The batarang clanged off the wall behind Bart and ricocheted back to break the leg of the chair, sending Bart toppling over. Hal just barely managed to make a green mattress appear with his ring before Bart hit the floor.

"Really guys?" asked Hal. "Was that really necessary?"

Oliver gave Bruce a quick nod, "I don't like you, but that was nice. Bump it."

Bruce promptly fist-bumped Ollie before wiping off his hand where their hands touched, "Let's not do that again."

"Yeah, that was just weird."

_**later on. . . .**_

The four of them were huddled in a circle behind the Kent Barn. Having lured Billy away from his play date with Jo'an, they were ready to scare him into treating Jo'an right. They were currently arguing about how they should go about it.

"Out of the way, I've got this bros," yelled Bart as he pushed to the front of the pack of their interrogation committee. "Alright, look here you...you..._Harry Potter...l__ooking...kid_, that little girl is my sidekick, ya hear?"

Billy twisted his face in confusion, "Ok..."

Bart nodded, trying to do his best Robert DeNiro face, "And if you...if you break her heart? I'll kick your ass!"

Nudged Ollie, Hal whispered, "Oh god, did he really just say he was going to kick a kid's-"

"Yeah, he did, this is going horribly," muttered Oliver with a head shake.

Billy chuckled. Even at his short height, Bart wasn't that much taller than him. It gave him confidence, "Yeah?"

"Yeah!" shouted Bart.

The was the answer that Billy was hoping to hear.

"_Shazam!_"

They shielded their eyes as a lightning bolt thundered down to the ground in front of them. When they lowered their arms, they didn't see the young Billy Batson standing there. Instead, there stood Captain Marvel, towering over them all.

Bart turned to Oliver with a fearful look, "I forgot that he could do that."

Ollie gritted his teeth, "Ya think?"

"I understand now why you always have food in your mouth, keeps all the _stupid_ words inside," growled Bruce.

"We're not actually going to fight a kid, right? It's not coming down to that, right?"

Bart growled, "I can't believe we're going to get our butts kicked by a kid!"

Bruce's eyes opened wide in shock, "We? I'm going to give you to him! You started this!"

"Come on, guys, you don't really think this kid can take the four of us, do you?" demanded Ollie.

All three of them turned on the Archer, Bruce spoke first. "He could take on Clark and stand a chance, Oliver."

Ollie rolled his eyes and muttered, "Like I've never gone toe-to-toe with the Boy Scout..."

"You guys are being very vague about the fighting a kid thing, and I'd really like an answer about that," muttered Hal.

They heard a door slam which was quickly followed by, "Nobody is going to be fighitng anybody!" They turned to see Lois Lane stomping towards them. "You four are ridiculous, you know that?"

Ollie's jaw dropped, "But Lois! He-"

"No 'But Lois', Ollie. You four go into the house right now before I do some ass kicking of my own!"

"But-"

"No! Go!" Ollie and Bruce opened their mouths to argue some more, but she pointed towards the house. "March!"

All four them hung their heads and slowly walked into the house, each muttering under their breath about how mean Lois was and how they weren't actually going to fight Billy. Lois turned to Billy, who was back in his boy form.

"I'm sorry, Billy. The boys are just really protective of Jo'an, I'm sure you can understand that, right?"

He nodded with a small smile, "I understand, but how come you don't get protective, Mrs. Kent?"

Lois gave him an amused smile, "You have to understand, Dear...Jo'an is a _Lane_."

"I thought she was a Lane-_Kent_?"

She was caught off guard for a second, she was normally on the other side of this conversation. "Well, uh... You see, the Lane part comes first, so really, she's just a Lane. We just say the Kent part so Mr. Kent thinks he has a say about stuff."

Billy didn't really understand, "Ok...Well...I'm going to be going now...The Young Justice has a softball game later today..."

Lois stood there as she watched the boy turn back into Captain Marvel and fly up into the sky. She let out a sigh. Jo'an had a little crush on him, but she had seen this show before. A nerdy boy falling for a strong willed babe? He was in her hands, and he was far more at risk of getting hurt than her little Monster was.

"So, we just say the Kent part so I think that I have a say around here?" Her eyes got big as she turned around to see her husband standing behind her. "Four of her uncles and her mother go behind the barn with her crush, and you thought we wouldn't use our super-hearing?" he asked with a sly smile playing on his face.

Lois gulped before regaining her composure. "You aren't going to _kill_ me, Smallville."

"No?"

She smirked, walked up, and put a hand on his chest. "Not when we're going up to the Loft for some _kissing_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I know that there have been some requests to see the gang get protective of Jo'an when she starts liking boys, so I came up with this idea. I always intended for it to be Chris Kent, but who says that I can't have Chris end up in the same situation later on? haha. There were plenty of ideas, so there's plenty of ways to go!

Anyways, hopefully you guys liked it, can't wait to hear what you thought! Also, I'd like to give a shout out to _LoisClarkNLove's_ new story: **_Sleeping with the Enemy, OneShot Series_**! She credited me, but all I did was do the last line or two, but the story itself is fantastic! Highly recommend it to everyone that enjoys my stuff here, because she's even better!

**Next Up:** Probably _Metropolis_, haha. Hey! It's probably going to happen this time! haha.


	195. Metropolis

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisClarkNLove**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! Feels a little weird to reply so long after, haha. Especially when we talk everyday, haha.

**_h-g-j-l-e-r-k_** - Haha, yeah, she'll get around to it sooner or later, just like Lois and her wanting to kill Clark, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, most of the League was "dead" at the time, so they didn't have much of a say, haha. Lex just represents what the Orange Lanterns are all about, which is greed. He doesn't have the ring anymore, because really, there is only one true Orange Lantern, which is Agent Orange aka Larfleeze. He refuses to share his power, because as the Lantern requires, he is overrun with greed.

I do have a lot of idea, as you will read in the Author's Note, I wanted to wait until I filled up my DocManager, so even though I disappear from time to time, I do have a lot of ideas to keep me coming back. Who knows, maybe 300 is in the cards! haha.

**_milkshake42_** - In the end, they'll end up together, but they'll have bumps like any couple should. Yeah, 90% of the disguise is that the way that Clark acts as, well, Clark, should make people think for a moment, "Gee, Superman sure looks like Clark..." and then they think about how nerdy, dorky, and clumsy he is and then they laugh it off as a mere coincidence. Yeah, most of my readers really love Jo'an, mygyps17 really created a wonderful character and I'm so glad that she lets me use her!

_**LaLaALa521**_ - I'm glad that you like them!

_**cathy03** _- Mhmm! haha. I love writing them, as grown men, fighting for the attention of a little girl! haha. They're such goofs, and as always, I love writing them as more than just people in costumes. It's great to see them as people too.

_**crazhpcfan**_ - Aww, I'm so flattered! I'm glad that you like them!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Lollie

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #195, Metropolis

**Author's Note: **I know, I know! I've been gone forever! haha. I told myself that I wouldn't update until I had 15 chapters in my DocManager to avoid those long disappearances, but well, it took a bit longer than I was planning. Things have been a little crazy, I have a new roommate, it's made my normal "process" a little trickier, haha.

Anyways, I hope you guys like this one! I know I've been teasing it for ages! haha. You might want to stop by and re-read Chapter #78, Metropolis University for some back story.

* * *

"Is that...is that Lois Lane?"

She turned around to see two girls sprinting towards her. "Katie? Trish? What are-"

The two crashed into her, almost toppling her over. Lois tried to straighten herself out while they jumped up and down screeching with glee. "Lois! Where have you been? We haven't seen you since freshman year!"

"Uh...well, I was kind of expelled."

Trish made a face, "Is it because you killed Coop?"

"I didn't kill Coop! Geoff Johns killed Coop!"

Katie gave Lois an apologetic look, "We knew that..." before turning to Trish and giving her a '_whoops_' look.

Lois held up her hand to let her know that it was ok, and that's when they caught a glimpse at her ring-finger. "You're _married_?"

They immediately threw themselves at her, screaming and dancing with excitement.

"Is it Oliver Queen? I heard you were dating him a couple years ago, and didn't he get married?"

"Oh god, he is soooooo hot!" squealed Katie.

Lois shook her head, waving her arms, "No, I did not marry Oliver Queen! Puh-lease, talk about a nightmare, my bathroom counter would be covered in little girly hair products!"

Trish smirked, "Too much work keeping yourself pretty for him?"

She looked at Trish like she was nuts. "Me? It'd all be his crap!"

Before they could ask what she meant, her phone started ringing. When she was the caller-id, she flipped the phone open. "Hi, Honey."

Immediately, Katie and Trish screeched in excitement, causing Lois to turn and walk a little ways away. She could hear Clark jump away from the phone, no doubt causing his super-hearing to buzz and make his ears ring. "What was that?"

"Sorry, it's just Katie and Trish, they must have uh, seen some handsome boy-toy across the street...or something..."

"Katie and Tri...Your friends from Met-U?"

Lois grimaced, she could almost see the smile in his voice. "Uhuh..."

"The ones that were convinced that you were _oh_ so desperately in love with me?"

She gritted her teeth and shot a look over her shoulder, "They never used the word _desperately_."

Clark let out a chuckle that told her that she was going to have to kill him when she got home. She knew that chuckle. It was a chuckle that she was sure that Ollie had taught him, and for that, she was going to have to kill Ollie too. There was plenty of room for a second body somewhere on the back forty acres.

"Well, in that case..."

Lois growled, "I'm warning you..."

Clark just chuckled some more. "I wuv you, Snookums. And I hope you have just the most wonderfulest day in all the land," he teased in a lovey-dovey voice before making kissing sounds into the receiver.

She clenched her eyes shut, doing her best to keep her voice quiet so that her friends couldn't hear the threats she was about to make, "I'm going to kill you when I get home, you know that?"

"No kissies?" he asked in a baby voice.

Despite her best efforts, she couldn't help but smile. Not that she would ever tell _him_ that.

"Shut your face, Smallville, you're going to feel the pain when I get home. You hear me? I'm talking greenies in your cereal pain! Your butt is mine!" she threatened in a hushed voice.

"Promise?" he teased.

Lois rolled her eyes and shut her phone, turning back to her friends who were smiling ear-to-ear grins.

"Smallville?" asked Trish.

Katie sqealed. "You totally married that guy from Smallville, didn't you?"

"...he isn't exactly _from_ Smallville."

They shook with excitement, giving her a '_you-better-own-up-to-it-right-now_' look.

A long and ragged sigh left her lungs as Lois admitted it, "Yes, you guys were right. I had a thing for him, are you happy?"

They broke into a happy dance, chanting "I told you so! I told you so! I, I, I told you so!"

"Alright! Alright! Can we please act like adults?" grumbled Lois.

Katie rolled her eyes, "Can we please be excited for our friend, Lo? You got _married_! That's exciting!"

Even Lois had to smile at that. "I guess it's a _little_ exciting..."

"A _little_ exciting? Did she just-"

"I think she did," confirmed Katie.

Lois let out a groan. "Do we have to make a big deal out of this?"

"Of course we have to make a big deal out of this! Did you even have a proper bachelorette party?"

"Yes, I did. Ok? And it was something I'd like to never relive. There was fire, and a casino, and I woke up on some train tracks and I'm pretty sure a lemur crapped in my house," she ranted before letting out a big sigh.

Katie looked at Trish before mouthing, '_A lemur?_'

"I guess you still know how to party?" laughed Trish.

Lois furrowed her brow, "Lets just say that my friend Zee is in a lot of trouble when I see her."

"Well, can we at least meet the lucky guy?"

"What?"

Trish rolled her eyes, "Can we meet your husband?"

Lois paled. "Ummm, yes? I guess. I can't... I can't think of a reason why not..." _Dammit, Lane!_

"Yay! What do you say, dinner tomorrow night? At the Ace of Clubs?"

"Umm...sure?"

_**to be continued in. . . .**_ _**the Ace of Clubs!**_

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. This was an idea I had when I originally posted my Met-U chapter and someone said something about how fun it would be to see those characters again, and have them find out that she ended up with Clark afterall.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! Looking forward to reading your reviews!

**Next Up:** _Metropolis Square_.


	196. MetroSquare

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm glad you liked it! Yeah, the dinner is going to be a wild one, haha. I'm glad you like the series, hopefully you stick around and you'll enjoy what comes down the road!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It's good to be back, haha. I've been trying to get around to posting, but I wanted to put myself in a position to post more consistently. It's just been a little hectic in real life lately, haha. I'm glad you liked the chapter, it's been sitting around forever without an ending. Hopefully you'll like what happens next! haha.

I didn't read that particular story, but I assume that he is still alive because he wasn't exactly in the fight until it became kind of a "the world is going to end" type situation. I'd definitely like to get ahold of that story and find out exactly how it all went down. I just know the cliff notes right now, so hopefully I know more soon, haha.

_**Mpj891**_ - Thanks!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - I think it's going to be an interesting one, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Thanks! I hadn't realized that I hadn't done a Cyborg chapter yet, I'll have to write something. I know that I had him paired up with Dinah of-screen at one point, but I'm not sure if I've mentioned anything else about him. Same thing goes for Mia. As for the Kandorians, I have thought a lot about trying to tell a story that explains what happened to them at the end of Season 9, we'll see what happen, I'm not sure yet. There is a Zod chapter coming though.

_**Lilbit4**_ - Aww, I'm glad that you enjoyed it!

_**Lovelybutterfly17**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, and yes, the dinner shall very interesting, haha. And don't worry, I know I disappear for a bit every once in a while, but I always find my way back! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #196, Metropolis Square

**Author's Note: **This one is going to be pretty obvious, it's a prequel to chapter 173, _the Death of Superman: Part 1_.

* * *

_They say that right before you die, your whole life flashes before your eyes._

He staggered.

His vision was blurry at first, sound was all but gone. He clenched his eyes shut, and when he opened them, he saw a sight he didn't expect. He recognized it, almost immediately. Though he struggled to fathom how he was in Metropolis a moment ago and on Krypton now.

Clenching his eyes shut again, he rubbed them with force. When he opened them this time, he could see his parents. Sitting there on the porch swing. His father waved to him. Jonathan's mouth moved, but he couldn't hear the sound.

This time, he shook his head as his eyes shut. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong. He tried to shake it from his mind.

Perry White roared in the background, a smug smirk traced across Lois Lane's face. Poor Jimmy Olsen was fleeing in fear as he bumped into the towering Steve Lombard, whom was hitting on Cat Grant. As usual.

It was the sound of the building nearest to him crashing down that brought him back to Metro-Square. He looked back at it, the crushed in wall that he had just been flung through. He looked back out at the Square. It stood there, menacing as ever. It felt like they had been at this for days. He felt broken. He didn't know how much more he could take of this.

Doomsday growled at him for a moment, but quickly turned it's head away, peering off into the distance.

'_What...why isn't...why isn't it coming to kill me? What is it looking at?_'

A faint memory came to mind. It was a memory of Shelby. It wasn't really a memory, more of a recognition. The way that Shelby would look up at him, wanting to play catch, even if his old bones couldn't quite chase down the tennis ball like he used to. It was the way that he would look up at him with rapt attention, but would rip his head towards the door at the sound of Lois pulling into the driveway.

He closed his eyes again, softly this time. He listened. He listened for whatever it was that it was listening to.

"_I just got a text from Mr. Lombard, he says the last sighting was Metro-Square!_"

His mind raced, '_Was that Jimmy? What was he doing-'_

"_What if he doesn't stop it?_"

He frowned for a moment, '_Who is he talking-_'

He knew that voice.

He knew who Jimmy was talking to. He knew that determination, that unrelenting faith, and more importantly, he knew that voice. It was the one voice he wish he didn't hear, because it meant she was coming right to him. "Lois...No..."

The ground crumbled as his feet shot away. He wouldn't let this monster out of his sight, he would end this now.

It was distracted by the sound of the woman's voice. It's hunger for violence was unquenched despite the rubble around him. It made to move towards the voice, but was halted by a hand wrapped around it's shoulder. "Don't even think about it!"

He shot it across the square, crashing through cars and buildings. He felt his strength renewed. He was on a mission.

But so was it.

If it hadn't been for the roar, he might not have even seen it coming. It moved so fast for something so big. It tackled him through the building on the other side of the square. He rose to his feet, gripping his hands together to deliver a thunderous blow to it's shoulder. The force was enough to snap off the bone-spike that protruded from it's skin.

He lifted the spike into the air. Knowing that like a diamond, only itself could break it's skin at this point, he made to stab it. Instead, the creature slapped him back into the square. Scrapping past a piece of metal that had been stuck in the ground, his cape ripped off before he hit the ground a few feet away. He slowly rose to his feet this time. He was hurting. His renewed strength was but a memory as he felt the blood trickle from his temple. Before he knew it, the creature had wrapped it's arms around him, squeezing.

Luckily, he had managed to get his arms between his chest and Doomsday's crushing limbs. Still, he was no match for it. He was slowly losing his hold, and it would only be a matter of moments until he gave out and was crushed to death.

In the distance, he could hear the tires screech.

That was all that he needed to hear. "If...If I'm going to die here...I'm taking you with me..." he growled.

He used what strength he had to lunge forward, into the ground. Into the spike. Like butter, it pierced not only through his chest, but into Doomsday's and through it's heart. It sputtered as it fell to the ground beside him against a boulder, gasping it's last breath.

For now.

Trying to stand, he settled for crawling. He made it a few feet, but found himself sliding down a crater in the center of the Square. There were a lot of those. He laid there for a moment, trying to remain conscious. Blood was filling his lungs, it wouldn't be long now.

He heard the tires screech to a stop. Close. He tried to muster the last of his strength, the last of his will to climb out of the crater. It didn't go well, but that was ok. It was ok because the sun was blocked for a moment, and when he looked up, he saw her.

Lois Lane.

For a moment, he wanted to laugh. You do see your whole life right before you die. It was standing up there, in stiletto heels.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Just like Part 1 and a couple of the other parts, this is straight out of the script that I wrote based on the Death of Superman. I was just in the mood to do some edits and thought it might be a good idea for a chapter, so here ya go! haha. Anyways, looking forward to what you guys thought, hopefully you enjoyed it!

**Next Up:** _Villains._


	197. Villains

**Review Comments:**

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It might have been you that requested they return, I can't remember off the top of my head! haha. And yes, I think the dinner should prove to be entertaining, haha. Awww, I'm sorry! haha. I'm glad you still liked it though! That whole storyline brings so many ideas and stories, I'm sure it's not the last we'll see of it.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Yeah, Lois is pretty much at the heart of what makes Clark Superman, they really ought to stop putting her in the damsel role if they want to have a chance here, haha.

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**Katlynne**_ - *eye roll* you are so biased! I always like to poke fun at Oliver's hair, hahahaha. I would have paid big dollars to hear Tom Welling talk in a baby voice to Lois, hahahaha. I can just picture Lois trying to give him a death glare, and failing, haha. You are sooooooooo biased! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, I know, it's always tough when you stop to think about Lois there. I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, mentions of Bara

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #197, Villains

**Author's Note: **This one takes place shortly after when Kara reappears in the present when Brainiac returns, as seen in chapter 164, _the Future_. It also kind of precedes the whole Death of Superman thing, and explains so other stuff. Enjoy!

* * *

"Wait, so what the hell is going on?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "Bart got himself a girlfriend."

Oliver shook his head and held up his hand, "Not that. I still don't believe _that_. You said a green dude from the future showed up at the farm?"

"It was Brainiac."

He gave Clark a funny look, "Like, the super-computer from Krypton that was hell bent on destroying Earth?"

Clark frowned a moment, "Actually, that's exactly what I'm talking about."

"I thought you killed it?"

"Well, I gave it to the Legion because they said that they could fix it."

Oliver gave him a pained look, "And the Legion are those guys with the rings from the future?"

Lois nodded, "And I thought Hal looked ridiculous, you should see what passes for superhero-fashion in the future."

They both gave her a look.

"Oh, shut up, you two. I was desperate for a story and now, well... it's more _him_ than me!"

Oliver smirked as Clark turned a little red. "Look, the point is, Brainiac isn't our only problem right now."

"What do you mean?"

Clark swallowed deeply, "Rokk and the Legion came from the future to try and deal with the Brainiac situation on their own, before Brainiac could do anything or change anything. Obviously, Brainiac got to the Farm and then got away again."

"And?"

"You aren't going to like it."

Oliver frowned, "What is Brainiac going to do, Clark?"

He hesitated for a moment. "Brainiac was already gone when Bart and Kara made it to his ship, so he could be anywhere. Space is a big place, and we just don't have the man-power to track him down. Not with our responsibilities here."

"Can't Hal flag the Corps? If one of the Lanterns comes across Brainiac, that could be the lead we need to find him," asked Ollie.

Clark looked at Lois, who looked legitimately scared. Oliver frowned harder. "What is it?"

"Rokk said that Brainiac being back... He said that Brainiac will re-awaken Davis's monster side."

Ollie's jaw hung a little slack. "The one that was supposed to kill you?"

Clark nodded, "It gets worse."

"What could be worse than that thing coming back?"

They shared another look, this one might affect Oliver more than it would affect them. Though it would be hard to top the reaction that Lois had when she heard that Doomsday would return. "We didn't stop Darkseid."

Oliver's fear was apparent. "What are you talking about? You said that you killed him..."

"Apparently, I only killed his host. The real Darkseid is still on Apokolips, which is returning to it's original place in the universe. Brainiac will help him develop something called a Boom Tube. Many of them, actually. Darkseid will be able to use them to return. After we defeated him, his rage has only grown. He is going to come for me and the people of Earth because now it's personal."

Lois finally spoke up, "And that's not all."

"That's not all? What else could happen? Lex is already back, now we're talking about Brainiac, Doomsday, and Darkseid coming back. I mean, how the hell this could get any worse?" he said in a voice that sounded like a laugh, but they knew was a mask for his fear.

Clark sighed, "Zod will be back."

Oliver's eyes grew big. "The Zod that we trapped in the Phantom Zone? The one that bonded with the original Zod and will have powers on Earth this time? The one that we probably made more pissed off than he has ever been?"

"Darkseid is able to enter the Phantom Zone, and he will free Zod. And he comes, he won't be alone."

He started to pace as he took all this in. Clark and Lois exchanged looks. They were right to do this with Oliver before they talked to the rest of the League. None of them knew what they were up against. Bart and J'onn were around, even AC was for a bit, but none of them knew Clark's foes like Oliver did.

They didn't need to create anymore fear than they had to. Bruce would be overly-serious enough as it was.

"So let me get this straight... Brainiac is back, stronger than ever since he's got some futuristic body. Doomsday will be back, whom we couldn't even kill last time, and won't be able to stop this time since we've already beat him and he'll have evolved again. Then we'll get a visit from good ole Darkseid in some freakish subway from hell, this time in the flesh and not as a creepy, zombie Lionel Luthor body. Oh, and then we'll get to see Zod, who is essentially an evil version of Superman, which reminds me, if Ultraman comes waltzing through the door, I _will_ flip out. And Zod is going to be bringing some company with him when he escapes form the Phantom Zone?" ranted Ollie.

Clark and Lois exchanged nervous looks, "Umm, yeah?"

Oliver shook his head slowly, "Your fortune tellers _suck_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Since the news that Smallville would be getting a comic-version of Season 11, I have been trying to figure out what villains we might see since most of Superman's villains have been dealt with on the show. And I came up with this idea that since I brought Brainiac back from the future (and Doomsday back, though without an explanation of how he returns), I thought what if Brainiac coming back could lead to all of the major villains come back from the "dead"? Anways, I hope you that liked it! Can't wait to hear what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Darkseid's Minions._


	198. Darkseid's Minions

**Review Comments:**

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k** _- I explained that in Chapter 164, _the Future_ actually, haha. The Legion used the uncorrupted pieces of Brainiac to create Brainiac-5 and stored the corrupted files in a vile that Garth accidentally knocked over and released.

_**cathy03**_ - I think that they ran out of material to write about and decided to bring those characters in, hahaha. That's why I have always regarded Smallville as it's own continuity and have tried to create believable reasons for why they come back, stronger and worse than ever, now that he is Superman. I really think Smallville was the prime of that Superman's career, I've just tried to bring them back because it's kind of boring to tell a Superman story without his prime villains, haha.

But yeah, I think Hank Henshaw is going to appear in the new comics though as Cyborg Superman, I've seen him mentioned. Oh! Whoops, I shouldn't make your anxiety flare up! haha. Just a tid bit though! haha. Here's a chapter to settle it back down! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Luke I was telling cathy03, where the fun in not having those prime villains come back? haha. I think Smallville was _that_ Clark's prime, and that's why he faced those characters. Well, besides the writers running out of original ideas, haha. I have written about most of those characters already, so I figured I'd come up with _why_ they're back, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you have liked them! Yeah, I was a little disappointed with Clark's fight with Doomsday on the show. Ever since my superman-fanhood resurfaced a few years back, I've drooled about the idea of present-day special effects lightshow with Clark against one of his biggest foes like Doomsday or Darkseid or even Lex in the power-suit, so I was a little let-down by the two second fight he had with a guy in a suit. But oh well, haha. If you haven't seen it, I would highly recommend checking out Superman: Doomsday, the animated film. The DC animated films are sooooo good.

Umm, I think for the most part, that story was wrapped up. Was there a part you were still wondering about? I'd love to revisit that story if there was. I do have ideas here and there, just haven't had enough storm together for enough to do a whole chapter about quite yet. So if you had any questions and lingering thoughts, that might be the spark I need, haha.

I am cautiously excited, haha. I've very excited to return to the world of Smallville, but it needs to be done well, otherwise it's going to be a big letdown for us fans that love the show so much. I'm trying not to get too excited in case I get disappointed. I am however reading the New 52 like crazy, and I have to admit, even though there are a lot of changes to the Superman story, I am very much enjoying Action Comics, Superman, and Supergirl so far.

_**sasslady**_ - Exactly. Even though I think Smallville was Clark's prime as a superhero, whether they meant to make it that way or not, I like to think that my version of the characters are just beginning to hit their prime, so that means you have to bring all those badies back! haha. The Legion will definitely be returning in a few chapters, albeit in a smaller role for right now.

I do have plans to visit the 31st century again, so we will definitely be seeing them in a larger role down the road a bit. I'm glad that you liked TDOS, I do have a feeling I'll revisit it from time to time. Too many ripples not to. I think they're doing the comic because they know they have a rabid fan-base that would love to have more, but I really hope this isn't just a ploy to make some more money, because it needs to be well done. If they want more of my money (I do intend to buy the comics still), they should just release the complete series on blu-ray. I would buy that in a heartbeat, haha.

_**Mp891**_ - Nah, no April Fools joke here, haha. I just wanted to write an explanation piece about how all these characters were going to return despite their supposed demise on the show. I've written about Bizarro, Doomsday, Brainiac, and Ultraman, and I plan to write about Darkseid, Zod, Metallo, and others in the future. Felt like something I should do.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #198, Darkseid's Minions

**Author's Note: **I was reading the new Justice League comics, and I came up with this idea: what if the League was busy and Superman had to fight those little winged demon things on his own? Maybe somebody would stop by to help.

* * *

He collected his thoughts as he peered out at his winged-opponents. He needed some help, there were so many.

'_Bruce is probably up to his neck in these things, I hope Dick and Tim are around to help him..._' he considered. '_Coast City and Central City are probably over-run, I'm sure Hal and Barry have their hands full...Diana too..._'

They looked hungry for Kryptonian flesh. He didn't know what they ate, but they sure looked like they wanted to pour steak sauce on him. He balled up his fists, waiting for one of them to charge. He knew it was just a matter of time. But before any of that happened, something descended from the skies. He lifted his arm to try and see through the bright lights, as it landed, a smile started to grow on his face.

"I wasn't expecting to see you drop in," smirked Clark.

He was met with a serious face. "Let's not get too chummy here."

Clark gave him an agreeing nod and moved to get back-to-back with him. "What do you say? Five hundred each?"

"I know you've got your super-panties on, but you'll be lucky to get two hundred in before I finish off the rest."

He was smiling again, "Shall we?"

"I was in the mood for _wings_ anyways."

Each charged into their separate crowds. Clark used his strength to swat about a dozen of them through the frenzy, probably taking out a good section of them. He traded blows, working his way into the middle of the pack, before grabbing one and spinning them with his super-speed to knock around a few more. Across the way, lasers flew about taking large sections of groups out.

Clark swung to take out about three of them. One shot past him from behind, causing him to look back at his partner. "Where the hell did things thing come from anyways?" he screamed at he used his lasers to blast away two or three.

"Darkseid!"

"Didn't you kill him already?"

Clark grimaced, "Just one of his hosts. The real one is much taller."

"You going to trade in your boots for high heels?"

He shook his head with a smile as he used his heat-vision to melt away a chunk of his oncoming attackers.

The battle raged on until just a few were left. Clark used his super-breath to freeze about half a dozen of them, a well-timed laser from behind him shattered the creatures where they stood, leaving just a pile of robotic parts laying at his feet. He quickly ran over to fend off the last of them, them both moving back-to-back as they swarmed.

It didn't take long before they were victorious.

Clark staggered, he was breathing hard. These little devils were a tough bunch. He liked to think he got more, but they probably broke even. He turned around to survey how the other side of the street looked.

"Looks like your suit got ripped, aren't you supposed to have super-speed? Or is that just what Lois writes to plump up her stories?"

"You ought to know, or do you deny my powers so your little Injustice League doesn't think less of you? I'm sure the Joker gets in a good one here and there, and at least Captain Cold slows down the Flash," retorted Clark with a smirk.

His eyes narrowed, "I could kill you if I wanted, I'd just hate to make all those reporters at the Daily Planet unemployed. It wouldn't fair well for me when I run for president, now would it?"

Clark rolled his eyes, "I wouldn't get cocky, one of your little lightbulb looking things got ripped off."

He ripped his head to look at his shoulder where wires were all that remained. "Those sneaky little bastards."

"Oh come on, can't you just bury the expenses in one of the LexCorp ledgers?"

Lex turned to him with a smirk, "Clark. I would never do something so unethical."

Laughing, Clark shook his head. "I thought we weren't going to get chummy?"

"Yeah, well, I guess one joke can't hurt. Kill you next week?"

Clark gave him a small smile, "Wouldn't want people thinking you helped me out of the kindness of your heart, would we?"

"Oh no, of course not. Let Lois know that when she writes the story, either leave me out or write up a particularly witty quote from me about wanting to get to kill you myself," Lex said as his boosters turned on and he shot up into the sky.

He looked up at the sky with a sad smile as Lex took off. '_See you next time, Old Friend..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I wasn't sure about this one, but I had fun writing it and a certain writer encouraged me to post it, so here it is. Hopefully, you guys liked it like she did, haha. Can't wait to read your reviews! And just a heads up on the next chapter, it's a two-parter that will be posted together, so watch out for that!

**Next Up:** _Elseworlds._


	199. Elseworlds

**Review Comments:**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Yeah, I just had this idea about them fighting back-to-back and it became that, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It is the kind of story that I will probably revisit. I have been re-reading some of my older chapters for ideas for little tie-ins and stuff, and I noticed a little bit I put in one chapter that probably got overlooked that I might use to connect with the "Villains" chapter, so at the very least, we could see a prequel to TDOS in the very near future.

I'm a huge fan of the animated stuff, I think their Wonder Woman film was probably the best adaption of her story to date. Yeah, I just hope they write a quality Superman story while staying true to the Smallville roots. That means I want to see and hear a Lois that is like Erica Durance, I want to see and hear a Lex that is like Michael Rosenbaum, and obviously I want to see and hear a Clark/Superman that is like Tom Welling. But I also want an epic Superman story too, that's a tall order, haha.

Actually, I have been reading like fifteen titles of the New 52 (all of the Superman's, Batman's, and every character from the League) and I haven't seen any pro-Wonder Woman and Superman stuff. I think it's pretty clear in the Superman comics that he is kind of in love with Lois, although they aren't together, I feel like it's pretty clear she definitely cares a great deal about him. I think people might have jumped the gun with the WW/SM worries, haha.

_**DisneyDancer**_ - That's a really good idea, haha. I'll see what I can come up with. I'm glad you liked everything!

_**Katlynne**_ - *glares playfully* uhuh, haha. The idea was to make you not realize who it was, silly, haha. I think them working together despite being on opposite sides is as true to Smallville cannon as anything, haha.

_**Ocean's Eyes**_ - Their relationship is super complicated, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**Mpj891**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing: **one-sided Clois, the Els, the Kents, Lexana, Chlollie, Chimmy

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #199, Elseworlds

**Author's Note:** So, this is going to be really different. And I'm going to forewarn you now, some of you might want to kill me after, haha. It's really long, and it's a two-parter. Hopefully you will like it, but I'm prepared for some flames too, haha. It's really serious, so there's that warning too. Just kind of roll with it, and hopefully it all makes sense in the end. Enjoy!

* * *

It was the sunlight that woke him up, but it was the fact that it was red that concerned him.

He sat up, startled to say the least. '_What in the world..._' He rubbed his eyes to clear his vision. As he looked around the room, he didn't recognize a single thing. He moved to the window, the skyline was unlike anything he had ever seen. Which was saying something, he had visited many civilizations in the universe on a few Green Lantern's peace keeping missions.

He'd also traveled to the future and visited the Legion of Superheroes in the 30th Century. But this was a sight to see.

"Kal-El, a gentle reminder, you are due to meet with your parents in the dining area for a late breakfast today," chirped a voice.

Clark turned to see a small robot floating above his bed, "My parents?"

He followed the little robot as it zoomed down the hallways of the house. When he turned the corner, he was stunned. Sitting that the table were his kryptonian parents, Jor-El and Lara. He stood frozen for a long while, long enough to get their attention.

"Are you ok, Son?" asked Jor-El.

Clark's eyes grew wider. "What is going on..."

Lara quirked an eyebrow at him, "Breakfast, Silly. Are you going to have some?"

He slowly walked over and sat down at the table. He had a strong gut feeling that something was wrong. Very wrong. He knew that Krypton had exploded shortly after his birth. He knew that his parents were dead. Even their clones. But this felt so real. He thought back to when Jor-El showed him a version of the world where he never existed. It had the same strange feeling.

Clark decided to play along, unsure of what exactly was going on. "Of course, Mother."

Jor-El continued to read from a tablet at the table, while Lara simply hummed and consumed her breakfast. Clark watched both of them very closely. He tried some of the food too. It tasted real. It tasted good.

He wasn't sure what he could do at this point. He knew that something was wrong. Or at least changed. He considered the possibility that someone had altered history. There were enough Legion Rings laying around to do just that. At the same time, he was enjoying seeing his parents, in such a normal state, very much. He even found himself contributing to the conversation from time to time.

"So, Son, what are you planning to do today?"

Clark hesitated. He knew what he should do. If anyone could help him, they would probably be on Earth. If anyone was going to know what was going on, they would probably be on Earth. "I know you probably won't understand, but I need to go to Earth."

Lara was confused, "Earth?"

Clark nodded, "You know of it, right?"

"Of course. It was one of the planets that we considered taking refuge on if Krypton's unstable core exploded."

"Father, it wasn't the core."

Jor-El nodded, "I know, it was Zod. He was trying to ignite the core with a corrupted version of the Brain Interactive Construct. Luckily, he was captured in time and save our planet. We were able to imprison Zod, and repair the corrupted files."

Clark let it all play out in his head. '_So that's what is different. Someone saved Kyrpton, but who would do that? Kara? The Legion?_'

"What is on Earth that is so important, Kal-El?"

He was shaken from his thoughts, he hesitated. He wasn't sure what to say. He wasn't sure how to explain it. "It's a long story..."

"We have time."

Clark nodded, "I understand that you have questions. I understand, that I must seem crazy right now. But you have to trust me. I can't answer your questions, because if this is real, it's best that you don't know these things. I want to come back, and I want to know you. I know how that must sound to you, but you have to trust me. You have to know that if this is real, I will be back."

Jor-El frowned, "Why wouldn't this be real, Kal-El?"

"Because if you knew what I knew, you would know this is almost too good to be true."

Clark walked up the steps of the Daily Planet, sighing at the familiar sight. Before he slipped through the rotating doors, he caught the headline of the paper in the machine to his right. He grinned as he read it slowly.

_**LexCorp **__**Philanthropist**_ Weds Hometown Sweetheart

The picture of Lex and Lana standing close brought a smile to his face. '_Good for them_.'

He pushed on through the rotating doors and found himself in the chaos that was the Daily Planet mid-day. He noticed Steve Lombard, hitting on Cat Grant of course. Sliding around them was a familiar face.

"Jimmy?"

He turned to him, but Clark noticed the lack of a bowtie. "Actually, they call me _Henry_ around here. My little brother has dibs on Jimmy since it's actually on _his_ birth certificate. He's an intern down in the basement."

Clark grinned like a fiend. "I see." Henry nodded and made to leave, but Clark stopped him. "Actually, I'm here looking for a friend of mine, you probably know her." He gave him a _go-ahead_ look. "Lois? Lois Lane."

Henry scrunched up his face, "Never heard of her."

"What?"

"She a reporter of something?"

Clark chuckled, "The best there is."

Henry shook his head, "I think Sullivan upstairs has a cousin named Lois. Maybe she'd know."

"_Chloe_ Sullivan?"

He nodded, "That's the one. We went out a few times, but she's dating that big-wig from Queen Industries. He uses too much _product_ if you ask me. She's up on the eighth floor, she's kind of the star reporter around here."

Clark grinned, "Thanks, Jim- I mean, _Henry_."

He boarded the elevator and pushed the button for number seven, and when he reached it, he made his way onto the news floor he knew all too well. "Troupe! I need the story about Luthor on my desk yesterday! Great Cesar's Ghost!"

To say that he was grinning, well, that'd be an understatement. But only got bigger when he saw that blonde hair.

He made his way over to her desk, wondering why she didn't have a private office of her own. Knowing Chloe, she liked being in the middle of the action. It wasn't like she required the locked door that he and Lois needed. She looked up at him standing there.

"Do I know you, friend?" she smiled.

Clark smiled, "You could say that, we uh... we kind of went to high school together. I'm Clark Kent."

Chloe thought on it for a moment, she didn't remember seeing this tall drink of water around the halls of Smallville High. "I think I'd remember you, Clark. Did you say Kent? Are you related to the Kents?"

He started to move his mouth, trying to figure out how to explain his relation to the Kents, but then he realized something. "Kent...s?"

"Yeah, Jonathan and Martha."

Clark's eyes got big. "They're still... They're not... They're still together?"

Chloe frowned and chuckled, "Uh, well, I seriously doubt divorce is ever going to be an option for those two."

His grin couldn't be contained, "This is... This is so perfect."

"What is?" she asked, confusion clearly set in across her features.

He ran his hand through his hair with a huge smile. "My parents, Krypton, Lex and Lana, the Jimmys, and now this? I don't know if this is real, but... I don't care, this is-"

"What is a _Krypton_? What does it have to do with Lex Luthor?"

Clark grimaced, "You've probably never heard of the Wall of Weird either, so I'm not even going to try and explain. I know I'm acting really strange, but I promise, I'm not some crazy guy. I just, I need your help."

Chloe bit her lip, something about this guy made her want to trust him. "With what?"

"I need to find Lois Lane. Your cousin."

"How do you know-"

"We're uh..." he grinned. "We're old friends. I need to find her, do you know where I can?"

She paused for a moment, "How do I-"

"Her favorite band is Whitesnake. She hates pink, but we both know she has at least half a dozen pink shirts in the closet. She can't spell to save her life and she can't start her morning with a cup of coffee and a maple doughnut."

Chloe raised her eyebrows, "You know her well. Better than me anyways, we don't really talk."

"What?"

"We aren't close, but I hear she's up at Fort Bennet. Probably a little ways out of your way, sorry friend."

Clark frowned at them not being close, "Sorry to hear that, but as fate would have it, that's exactly on my way. Thanks, Chlo."

She tilted her head, but he was already turned around and running towards the elevator. She couldn't help and chew the tip of her pen as her brow twisted up in confusion at this Clark Kent. '_Why is he going up instead of down?_'

Clark knocked at the door, he wasn't sure what to expect. He didn't know how he'd explain himself, but he had to see her. He had to. The security was more than easy to slip past. Whatever had changed, he was still a kryptonian under the yellow sun, it was hard to keep him out of anywhere. Keeping him from Lois Lane? Well, that was damn near impossible.

"Come in!" barked a voice from the inside.

He quickly stepped inside, and was surprised to see a still-blonde Lois Lane sitting at the desk. She was in full military attire. She looked up at him with almost a snarl, "Who are you? And what do you want?"

He frowned for a moment. He had been snapped at by Lois before, but this time, it had a whip to it. "My name is Clark, Clark Kent. I... I'm a friend of your cousin, Chloe-"

"Oh god, what does she want now? Are you one of her _worthless_ reporter friends?"

"What?"

Lois groaned, "I am so sick of you liberal media types, coming onto my base, questioning the way we do things. My job is to protect this country, to protect it's people. Sometimes, it gets messy. That's the price we pay. Get over it. I don't need anymore people like my dear cousin trying to make a story out of us just doing our jobs!"

Clark recoiled in shock, "Chloe is just trying to get the truth. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"Not when it gets in the way of doing what needs to be done."

"Lois, how can you say that?"

She growled, "It's Lieutenant Lane, Kent. Now what the hell do you want from me? And how did you get on my base?"

"What is wrong with you?"

"Me? You're the one that barged into my office! I have absolutely zero time for this, do you understand me? I have enough problems with these damn so-called superheroes, trying to take the law into their own hands. I have no patience some idiot my cornfield-high dunce of a cousin sent down here to get a story for that rag of a newspaper she writes for!"

Clark felt sick to his stomach. This was not his Lois Lane. And when he stopped to think about it, as he looked around at the pictures that didn't match in anyway beyond featuring Lois and her father, he understood why.

This Lois Lane never came to _Smallville_.

This Lois Lane traveled the world under her father's supervision, never had any of the experiences that made her _his_ Lois. This Lois was an army brat who never knew any family or had any friends. She never had a home. He remembered what she had told him about their Smallville-High Reunion so long ago. '_Smallville is the closest thing to a past that this army brat has_.'

"This can't be happening..."

She glared at him, "What now?"

He ignored her, closing his eyes. "This isn't real... This isn't real, Clark..." He had a gut feeling all along that there was something seriously wrong with all of this. Kara knew better than to change something this big, the Legion knew better, there was something else afoot. He just wanted it to be true so bad that he overlooked it. He ignored it.

But this was too much. This was unacceptable.

"Come on, Clark... Fight it..."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

His eyes clenched together harder, trying to drown out the sound of her voice. He could almost hear something. He didn't know if it was his super-hearing kicking in, but he could hear something. Something that didn't belong.

It sounded like a fight.

_"You can't do that! You don't know if he stills has his powers! You could kill him!"_

Clark whipped around, "Did you hear that?"

Lois frowned, "Hear what? Look, I don't know what the hell your deal is but I'm calling security!"

_"We can't wait any longer! They're dying! We need him, Barry!"_

He closed his eyes again, trying to will himself to come out of this. He shook with determination, he could hear the guards breaking into the room behind him. He faintly heard one of them threatening to open fire, but he could care less at the moment.

The smells of the room started to change, sounds went in and out as he heard the guards screaming and then crashes. He kept his focus on knowing that this wasn't real. He kept his focus on that this world didn't have his Lois, and that wasn't good enough.

And then, he felt the blade in his chest.

**to be continued. . . . in _Black Mercy_!**

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. The next part will be posted tomorrow or the next day, depends on what kind of reviews I get I suppose, haha. It's already done, so it will definitely be the next chapter! I just wanted you guys to relish in that little bit of a cliff-hanger for a day or two! hahaha. Put down the torches and pitch-forks! haha.

Anyways, hopefully you guys liked it, and it should all be explained int he next chapter, so go enjoy! Looking forward to hearing what you guys thought! Hit the little review button!

**Next Up:** _Black Mercy_.


	200. Black Mercy

**Review Comments:**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Hopefully this will explain things! haha.

_**Jas-El**_ - The funny thing is that it started as something else entirely, and as I worked on that idea, it kind of split into two different ideas and eventually, I saw the similarities to the JLU episode _For The Man Who Has Everything_ and I decided to split them into two ideas entirely and this is one idea, and the chapter _Sector 2813_ will be the other. I'm glad that you've been enjoying these last few updates, and hopefully I'll stick around for a good while, but that's up to the Muse, haha.

_**Lilbit4**_ - I'm glad you liked it, here is some more, haha.

_**Mpj891**_ - I hope you do too, I'm glad that you liked the first piece!

_**whynot1993**_ - It is a bit of a whirlwind, isn't it? haha. I'm glad that you've liked it.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that it left you reeling! haha. I was hoping that by the end, people would be freaking out, haha. He is not in the world that we know, I'll put it that way, haha. Hopefully this will explain it all for you! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Oh hush, haha. You're such a goose. Well, I wanted to kind of create a world where everything was just absolutely the way he wished that it could be, but that there would be one bit that shattered it all for him. Of course it had to be Lois, haha, she is his whole world, the one thing he can't do without, it had to be her. Uhuh, you've already read it, Missy! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I was hoping that I wasn't completely obvious from the get-go! Glad to hear it was a surprise for most! haha. No, it's not the Flashpoint series, though that certainly gives me some ideas if I wanted to abandon Smallville canon in the future and write something new and fresh in the future, haha. I hadn't thought about it like that until you mentioned it, I knew that one of them needs to be one of them because of, well, you'll see with the first line.

But you've certainly sparked a thought in my noggin' here, haha. Not that I'm planning on abandoning the Smallville canon any time soon, just a thought to ponder. It would be the perfect way to do that, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing: **one-sided Clois, the Els, the Kents, Lexana, Chlollie, Chimmy

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #200, Black Mercy

**Author's Note: **Wow, #200, eh? Just wanted to take this moment to thank everyone for reading all these chapters, you guys really are the best. From #1 until now, you've been amazing, and I'm so happy to have shared all of this with you!

Hopefully this answers the questions you had from #199! Enjoy!

* * *

_He closed his eyes again, trying to will himself to come out of this. He shook with determination, he could hear the guards breaking into the room behind him. He faintly heard one of them threatening to open fire, but he could care less at the moment._

_The smells of the room started to change, sounds went in and out as he heard the guards screaming and then crashes. He kept his focus on knowing that this wasn't real. He kept his focus on that this world didn't have his Lois, and that wasn't good enough._

_And then, he felt the blade in his chest._

_**and as promised. . . . continued from Elsewords!**_

Clark looked up to see the Trident of Neptune pierced through his chest. Luckily, it wasn't that deep. It went through some sort of plant that was currently attached to his chest first. Aquaman flicked it across the room, Clark's eyes followed it and saw it fly over a brawl. He could make out Batman, and it looked like Green Lantern and Wonder Woman fighting along side him.

Their opponent, Clark recognized him immediately. "Mongul..." he growled.

He climbed to his feet, ignoring both Flash and Aquaman, and stomped into the brawl. He pushed his way past Green Lantern, pulled a bloodied Wonder Woman out of the way, and stepped over the crouched-in-pain Batman.

Mongul looked at his new opponent. "Did someone wake up from their little fantasy?"

Clark shook with rage. He raised his fist and knocked him across the Hall of Justice. Mongul's back hit the wall hard, he started to slide down but Clark lifted him back up, slamming him against the wall nearly hard enough to break through it.

"Do you know what you did to me?" roared Clark.

Mongul smirked, spitting out some of the blood that was pooling in his mouth. "I gave you your deepest desire. Krypton."

Clark swung hard. He felt bones break in Mongul's face.

"You showed me a world, where my family was alive." He delivered another blow, more bones broke. "You showed me a world where my friends were alive, where they were happy." The next blow was to the body. "It was _everything_ I have ever wanted." He could feel the ribs shattering with each blow. "But you left out _one_ piece. Without it, that world was unbearable."

He threw Mongul through the wall, but his body's momentum took out the next several walls.

"It was so perfect, but then you ripped it all away from me," growled Clark.

Mongul tried to rise, but his body was breaking beneath him with every move. "I bet leaving was like ripping off your own arm."

Clark's eyes were red. "Try ripping out your own heart!"

His heat vision beat into Mongul, burning away his armor and scorching his flesh. Green Lantern grabbed Clark's arm, "Superman! You have to stop, you're going to kill him! Superman!"

"Get away from me, Hal..." he growled.

Green Lantern tried to grab him again, but Clark smacked him through the wall. Mongul tried to rise to his feet, "You won't kill me."

"Won't I?" he roared.

Clark slammed his fist into Mongul's gut, lifting him upright, and kicking him through the outside wall and into the street. He stepped through the hole in the wall and advanced on Mongul again with rage in his eyes. He grabbed Mongul by his throat, lifting him off the ground. "You made me lose it all over again. My parents. My father. My friends. Why wouldn't I _kill_ you?"

He crumbled down in pain, dropping a now unconscious Mongul. He looked back to see Batman standing behind him, wearing his kryptonite ring. "You can't do this, Clark. You can't become a killer over this scum."

Pain rippled across his body, he convulsed on his hands and knees. "He showed me a world where Krypton survived, Bruce. My parents were alive, my _father_ was alive. Why wouldn't I kill him? It was so perfect... I would have stayed... But _Lois_..."

"What about her? What about Lois, Clark?"

"She wasn't Lois. She was cold. She was heartless. She wasn't _my_ Lois, Bruce. I would've stayed, I would've let him keep me in that, that _dream_ world, but not without Lois. Not without the Lois that I love. It's not worth giving that up..."

Bruce knelt beside him, "Don't let him make you become someone you're not."

Clark tilted his head towards him, tears pouring out. "If he showed you a world where your father stopped that mugger... If he gave you your family back, only to rip them away... Wouldn't you _kill_ him?"

He took a moment to think about it, not that he needed it. "I would. But that's why you're different, Clark. And that's why Lois loves you. That's why you're the man, that Lois loves. You are a good man, Clark. Don't let him change you."

Clark sobbed lightly.

"I know you're angry, I know you want his blood right now, but if you're going to give up that world so that you can be with the Lois that you love, don't let him change you from the man that Lois loves," pleaded Bruce.

He nodded. He knew that Bruce was right. He didn't want to kill him anymore. That would be worse that giving in to Mongul's trap. He felt the pain disappear as Bruce tucked his ring into the lead-lineded compartment of his utility belt. He helped Clark to his feet, and carried him back into the Hall of Justice. Clark apologized to Hal, helped clean up the Hall, and went home.

As he walked through the front door, Lois was rushing on her way out. "Clark! I was on my way to the Hall! I saw what happened on the news! What happened? What is going on? Is everyone ok? I saw Mongul in the street!"

"Everyone is fine. I uh, I actually did all _that_."

She frowned, "What? You did that to the Hall? What happened?"

"I don't know, Mongul showed up I guess. He put something on me. Some kind of plant. It showed... It made me see... It made me see my heart's greatest desire," he explained slowly. He sat down at the kitchen counter.

Lois slowly sat down next to him, nervously watching him. "What did you see?"

Clark stared at the ground for a moment. "Krypton. It survived. My parents, survived. My dad, he never had his heart attack. Even Jimmy was alive, Henry, I mean. Everyone was so happy. Things were so... _perfect_."

"What happened?"

He trembled for a moment, "I went to find you."

She waited for a moment, "And?"

"You weren't you. You were... well, it doesn't matter what you were. You weren't you. Chloe never got into trouble, so you never had to come to Smallville. You never met my family, you never met me. You didn't go through everything we've gone through, you didn't end up at the Daily Planet, you were a _lieutenant_ at Fort Bennet. You have to understand, I was ready to give in. I knew on some level that it wasn't real, but I would have stayed. I would've given in, but not without you."

Lois started to tear up. She could hear the pain in his voice. "Oh, Smallville..."

"I couldn't live in that world, Lois. Real or not, I couldn't live in a world without you. You could give me everything else back, everything that ever went wrong, but without you... I couldn't. That might have been my hearts greatest desire this morning, but knowing what I know now, I'll take it all as it is to be right here with you. I love you so much, Lois," he almost cried.

She quickly hugged him, holding him tightly. "I love you too, Smallville. I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

He leaned back and cupped her cheek, "Promise me, you'll never change. I can't live in a world where you aren't you. Everything about you shapes who I am. I can't live in a world where you aren't you, where I'm not me, and we're not _us_."

Lois let a few tears drip down her cheek, "I promise you, Clark. I will always be _your_ Lois."

"Good," he whispered, brushing away the tears from her cheek. "Good."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? And yes, for those of you that are wondering, this was a kinda-sorta an adaption of the Black Mercy story from the comics called '_For The Man Who Has Everything_' that Alan Moore wrote. It started as something else, which will be in a future chapter, and ended up like this. Hopefully everyone enjoyed it, I thought it would be a special sort of #200 deal since we usually do something longer than usual and kind of big. Looking forward to your reviews! Thanks!

**Next Up:** I haven't named it yet, but there will be a chapter in a few days.


	201. Shower Curtain

**Review Comments:**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I've given up predicting the end, haha. I've already written what will be the final chapter, so we'll see, I actually wrote the final chapter around #30 or #40 I think. We'll just have to see when I run out of steam, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - No, I think the only characters that were "real" were Mongul, Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman. I don't remember much from the actual comic, I feel like I read it a million years ago to be honest, haha. I know that there was very different imagined world from what I wrote and from what was on the JLU. But as always, I went with Lois because things are just better with Lois, haha. I'm glad that you liked it! I was legitimately worried about it! hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And _thank you_ for sticking with me all this time! Yeah, I think diving into the JLU stories with Katlynne for her _Hereafter_ story really made me think about my favorite stories and how I could integrate some of them into this story. Though it also started as something very different, but you'll see that in _Sector 2813_.

Yeah, I knew I wanted to write an enraged Clark. I've had an idea bouncing around my idea that we might see at a later date, but I'm not sure. When Clark is raging, it really is a reminder to everyone around him, good and bad, that he is still the most powerful weapon on the planet. Yeah, I had to bring it all back around to Lois. She really ought to be the focal point of any good Superman story, and god knows I'll keep trying to wrap my stories back around to her, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**Katlynne**_ - *dramatic eye roll* you did not _win_. Thank you, haha. No, you are _crazy_, Goose, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - I think a _perfect_ Lois would still be _that_ Lois, haha. She'd be the same doughnut craving, word misspelling, hot headed, stubborn, all around awesome Lois Lane, haha. Everyone was actually the same, they just didn't have the bad luck of dying or being turned to the dark side. If Clark never comes to Earth, then Lex never loses his hair, and maybe his wit and charm make him popular and not tortured when he was young, and he stays good? Who knows, haha.

_**sasslady**_ - Yeah, I just wanted to end it on #200 so we could have another big chapter I suppose, haha. I'm glad that you liked it and I'm sure there is more where that came from! Thanks!

_**Super-Awesome-Poptart-Ninja**_ - I'm glad that you have liked them!

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k** _- Hahaha, I'll see what I can do about 300, not making any promises here! haha. I'm glad you liked them!

_**Diagnosis-MusicObsession**_ - Who doesn't _LOVE_ Firefly references? haha. Glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** the Kents, hints of Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #201, the Shower Curtain

**Author's Note: **So, I've taken up the habit of re-reading some of my old chapters to get ideas for little tie-ins and whatnot, and I came up with this little idea and couldn't pass it up. It's a kinda-sorta sequel to #3's _the Kents_, #11's _Shelby_, and #23's _Clark's Room_. Enjoy!

* * *

_She walked up to him, getting very close and causing him to get very nervous. She leaned down a little, but he was too focused on her face to notice why. She got very close to his face, he could literally feel her breath against his lips. "...we both know that..."_

_She started to walk away, swinging her hips with each step. "...you wish!"_

_Lois promptly turned and threw his wet t-shirt at his face. The water flew about, the shirt itself hit him just right to wrap around his head._

_By the time he pulled the shirt off, she was gone. Five seconds ago, he was pretty sure he wanted to kiss her. Now? Now, He was going to kill her. __"You are so dead, Lane," he muttered under his breath._

He tore off down the hall after her, finding her trying to get the bathroom door to open while laughing with glee. Her hands were still wet, that's why she assumed she couldn't get the knob to turn so she could escape Clark. "Lois!" he growled, trying not to sound too amused.

She shrieked as he caught up with her, his fingers finding her sides. "No! No tickling! Get your grubby hands off me, Smallville!"

"Oh, no! You have this coming, Lane!" he laughed.

Lois thrashed against the door, and suddenly, it popped open and they stumbled inside.

They both tilted their heads to the left a little, trying to figure out what they were seeing. The naked Jonathan quickly grabbed the naked Martha, twisted towards the shower curtain, which ripped and sent them toppling over into the bathtub.

Lois tilted her head, "Wow, Mr. K, you're way more flexible than I would have thought."

Realization dawned in for Clark as quickly shut his eyes. "Oh my god! This isn't happening! I didn't see that!"

He quickly turned and ran out of the bathroom, screaming about being blind. Lois stepped out of the room, her smirk ear-to-ear. "I'm just uh... I'm just going to leave you two uh... to _it_..." she all but giggled as she shut the door.

Martha buried her under the curtain that was covering them and into Jonathan's chest, her face bright red.

_**...ten minutes later in the living room...**_

Clark crossed his arms, the memory of his parents catching him and Lois in the bathroom fresh in his mind. His smirk was shining as he caught the corner's of his father's mouth lifting just a bit. His eyes weren't burning anymore, so it was payback time.

Lois shook her head slowly, an evil grin etched across her face as Jonathan gripped the towel around his neck, trying hard not to smile. Martha couldn't have been more embarrassed. "You know, I recall having a very long talk about how showers _aren't_...co-ed...around here."

Martha blushed crimson while Jonathan tried not to smile. "Lois..."

She tilted her head innocently, "Mr. Kent?"

"It's a little different, and you know that. Martha and I are _married_."

Lois almost knew that was what was coming. "So what you're saying is...if Smallville and me get married, we can have co-ed showers?"

"Yeah, is that what- wait, _what_?" asked Clark, going from co-teaser to confused in about two-seconds flat.

She waved her hand, "Down boy. Besides... you _wish_."

Jonathan shook his head slightly, trying not to enjoy the look on his son's face too much. Martha got even redder, this time from trying to hold in a laugh at her own son's expense. "No, that's not exactly what I'm saying. Besides, this is _our_ home."

"Well, you know, Mr. K... you did tell me that this was _my_ home too now," she smirked.

He gave her the ole '_nice try_' look, complete with Kent eyebrow action. "There will be no co-ed anything, under my-"

"Ahem."

Jonathan paled for a second, "Under _our_, roof. You two are still very young, you have plenty of time for _co-ed_ situations in the future."

Lois gave him a sassy smile, "Are you calling Mrs. K old, Mr. K?"

Martha gave him a sideways look that made Jonathan feel like he was between a rock and hard place as he stood between a glaring Martha and a smirking Lois. Something that he had a feeling that Clark would know all too well about in this _future_ he was talking about.

"No, Martha is not old. She is very young, and very beautiful. Which reminds me, we have some unfinished _business_ to attend to." He grabbed Martha's hand and pulled her towards the stairs, making sure to stop by Clark for a moment with a smirk at Clark's groan at what he assumed his father meant by _business_. "You're going to have your hands full with this one, Son."

Jonathan threw his towel over Clark's head and followed Martha up the stairs, pausing to look back at Lois. "Oh, and Lois? When the handle doesn't want to open, it probably means it's locked for a reason."

Clark groaned again as his father chased his mother up the stairs, his super-hearing picking up some girlish giggles along the way.

"Don't worry, Smallville, we will _never_ get caught having sex in a bathroom," Lois assured him with a teasing smile.

Clark rolled his eyes, "Uhuh..."

Her tongue danced along her K-9 tooth as she wagged her eyebrows, "...I can be very _discreet_."

She patted his head and left him standing in the living room, thinking about what the hell had just happened. He looked back to see her hips swaying behind her as she walked out onto the porch. He couldn't help but smirk.

'_We'll see about that,_' he mused for a moment before paling. '_Uh...not that...not that I...would want...to see..you know...about that..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I couldn't figure out how to slip it in there, but the kill-me-or-kiss-me idea was that Martha was mad at Jonathan at the end of '_the Kents_' and they ended up making with the hanky-panky instead of her killing him, haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! Can't wait to read your thoughts!

**Next Up:** _Sector 2813_.


	202. Sector 2813

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - I don't even know if I should reply to this sugar-crack review, hahaha. Ummm, I was calling you crazy, and now everyone can see how crazy you are, hahaha. Don't say '_bro_', haha. Like _ever_, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - Mr. Kent is like an onion, he has many layers, haha. I would have paid big money to see Erica Durance and John Schneider in a scene like this one, haha. Would have been hilarious to see their faces, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I do have another story that is like a companion piece to this one that would follow Connor, Bart, Cassie, etc. into a Young Justice/Teen Titans hybrid that would take place in this continuity, but I haven't gotten around to doing much more with it. I barely have had time to work on this one, haha, but I'm sure it will appear down the road.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Awww, I'm glad you liked it! haha. I like to think that the Kents weren't always as wholesome as they tried to make Clark think they were, haha. I reckon there was plenty of spark between ole Jonathan and Martha, especially when he was trying to get out of trouble, haha. Mhmm, I think Lois would have died of happiness! hahaha.

And yes, totally, Smallville's Lois Lane has by far been my favorite incarnation to date. She had all of the bits and pieces that make her the perfect companion for our Clark Kent, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, I think Clark might be scared for life, haha.

_**the'pretty-girl'wonder**_ - I've been trying to work Selina in for a while, I have a certain idea, but I haven't rounded it out well enough yet. I'm sure we'll see her in the near future, haha. I'm glad you've liked them so far!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** mentions of Lexana, Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #102, Sector 2813

**Author's Note:** So, this was originally what _Elsewords_ was going to be, but it became, well, _that_ instead, and I liked them both, so I've decided to just give ya both, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Dude! Clark! What the hell?"

His eyes shot open, he knew that voice. Why was he waking up to that voice? He sat up immediately and looked around the room, where was he? He looked at the voice in question, "Lex?"

Lex gave him a '_duh_!' look. "What the hell are you doing? Lana is going to be here any minute!"

"Lana?"

He groaned, "Yes! Lana, for our date! You aren't supposed to be here, man! You promised!"

Clark shook the sleep from his head, "And where is here, exactly?"

Lex shook his head and looked at Clark like he was crazy. "The apartment! _Our_ apartment! Get out of here, man!"

He shooed Clark from his seat, pushing him out of the living room. Clark felt like he was dreaming, which was a good sign after the whole Black Mercy incident, but he still couldn't help but turn back to ask. "Lex?"

"What?"

Clark couldn't hold the smile back, "You know you have a _pony-tail_, right?"

Lex frowned at him, once again looking at him like he was crazy. "Of course I know that! I grew it right after I quit working for my dad, you know I've always wanted a pony-tail, Clark! Besides, Lana kinda likes it. Gives her something to pull on, not that I would be opposed to her pulling on-"

"Hey! I don't, I don't want to hear about this."

He shrugged with a smirk, "Your loss."

_Ding_. "_Imminent Danger_."

Clark looked around for what made the sound that he just heard, he looked back at Lex. "Did you hear that?"

"Yeah, of course, it was your ring."

He looked down at his hand, "Lex, this is a _Green Lantern_ ring."

Lex tilted his head, his pony-tail swayed and Clark had to try like hell not to laugh about it. "Umm, yeah, I know."

"But Hal is Green Lantern. And John. And Kyle. And Guy, wow, there's a lot of Green Lantern's on Earth."

"_Earth_? What does that back-water rock have to do with anything?"

Clark frowned, "Lex, where are we? What planet is this?"

Lex didn't answer. Instead, he walked over and ripped open the blinds. Revealing the futuristic skyline of Kandor, the capital city of Krypton. Clark walked over and stared out in awe of the view before him. Lex quirked an eyebrow, "Now that we've established that we are at home on Krypton, why don't you go save the day? When the Guardians picked you to be the Green Lantern for Sector 2813, I don't think they meant for you to stand around like an idiot."

Clark rolled his eyes and looked at his ring, getting ready for the new adventure. "Go, go, Green Lantern ring?"

After a few more tries, he realized how to make the ring work and he jetted out into the skies where he saw a falling spaceship. He raced towards it, taking a moment to admire the white and blue uniform he was wearing. It was cape-less, he liked that. Not that he'd bring that up to Lois.

'_Lois... I wonder if she is here too..._' he mused.

Using his ring to create wings on the falling ship, he managed to right it and help it land safely on the run-way. He helped each passenger out, the power-outage was keeping the walkway from deploying, so he used his ring to create a slide to help them.

"Hey, Green Lantern! You going to give me an interview or what?"

Clark looked out to the crowd of reporters to see one familiar face standing out. His grin widened as he floated down to her, "Miss Lane."

Lois gave him a sassy smile, "Looks like you've got another save under your belt, Ring-Boy."

"I don't know what the attitude is for, Miss Lane," he smirked. "Looks like someone gave you a ring too."

They eyed the silver band on her finger, she looked up with another saucy smirk. "Yeah, at least my husband had the sense know green is kind of lame."

Clark floated a bit closer to her, "I think maybe we should have a word in private, Miss Lane."

He used the ring to create a green cone around them, drowning out the sounds around them and blocking them from view. Lois immediately grabbed onto him an planted a steamy kiss on him, causing them both to pull back gasping for air. "Not so lame after all," smirked Clark.

"It has it's moments," she conceded with a sly smile. She wagged her eyebrows,"Impromptu beds are nice, beats getting my ass photo-copied on accident for the whole Planet to see."

Clark grinned, "We better go back to the real world before people think something is up. I'd hate to give your husband the wrong idea."

Lois wagged her head, "Yeah, that _Kent_, he's the real jealous type."

As the cone began to disappear, Lois put on all the show they would need. "And another thing, if you're a real super-hero, why don't you have a _cape_?"

She turned on her heel and stormed through the crowd, pausing just a second to send him another sassy smile. Clark watched as she walked away, trying his best not to let that goofy grin take over. "Hey! Mr. Lantern! It's Jimmy Olsen! Can I get a picture?"

He turned, but the flash of the camera caused Clark to awake with a startle before settling back down in bed with a smile on his face.

"Good dream?"

Clark rolled over to see his beautiful wife laying in bed next to him, a smile playing across her face. He cuddled up close to her, Lois tucked her head against his chest and let out a content sigh. Clark kissed her hair, "Not as good as the one I'm living here with you, Lo."

She blew a raspberry, "If you wanna get lucky before the _Monster_ wakes up, just give me a wink, Smallville."

He started to wink dramatically, then he gave her the ole Kent eyebrow dance, and of course, he gave her the ole guns as he made little pistols with his hands. Lois just rolled her eyes and laughed at her silly husband, "You are such a nerd, you know that?"

"Is that a no?"

Lois twisted her face up in thought, "Nah, I think I can make it work. Just this _once_."

Clark rolled his eyes and threw the blanket over their heads. Jo'an would be up soon, so they knew they had to make it quick so that Lois could somehow ruin cereal and Clark could go to the Daily Planet to get hit in the head with footballs and spill coffee on himself.

And the truth was, they wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. This was what was originally the Elseworlds chapter, but obviously, that went in a totally different direction than this one ended up being, haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked my "what if Clark became Green Lantern?" idea. It's actually inspired by an alternate universe from the comics where Jonathan Kent sent Clark to Krypon because Earth was going to explode. Interesting idea, huh? haha.

**Next Up:** I'm not really sure, maybe_ Steve Trevor _or_ New York _or even_ Tempus _or_ Ace of Clubs_? They are all about as close to done as any of them, so we'll just have to wait and see which one talks first, haha.


	203. Queen Industries

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - *rolls eyes* uhuh. I thought you'd like that, hahaha. Oh come on, you love the guns! hahaha.

_**whynot1993**_ - It's a little throw in from the episode _Justice_ when Lex says he wished he had a pony tail, hahaha. No, I think she might be in a bit more of a kissing mood if I had to take a guess, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Yeah, it was a trippy idea that caught my imagination a bit, haha. And of course, there's no Superman without the wonderful Miss Lane! haha. Oh, I can just imagine the two of them going at it, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It's one of Katlynne's favorite lines from _Justice_ when Lex tells Bart he wishes he had a ponytail! haha. I had to throw it in there for her, haha. Oh boy, that'd be a sight to see! haha. Yeah, after the drama of Black Mercy, I had to keep Lois true to her good ole Lois Lane self, haha. Yeah, poor Jo'an, it's gotta be hell for her! haha. No Ace of Clubs just yet, but I think you might find yourself enjoying this one none the less, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**cathy03**_ - Yeah, it's a really interesting idea to have Clark Kent as Green Lantern. I know that they talked about having Tom Welling doing a cameo in the Green Lantern movie where the ring almost chooses him instead of Hal, that would have been the coolest! haha. I'm glad you liked it! I just had to add that little tidbit! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Such is the perils of becoming a parent, haha. They make up for it in the supply closet at the Planet though, haha.

_**alexindigo**_ - It's good to see you! I'm glad you liked them! Yeah, I was disappointed about Darkseid too, but I guess I understand that they had budget constraints being a TV show and they didn't want another lack-luster attempt like they had with Doomsday, which was so weak compared to how we all hoped that it would be.

I have been reading Season 11, I'm kind of reserving judgement for the time being. The three that have come out are really just three pieces of one real comic so far, so it's hard to really build up much. We'll have to wait and see how it all turns out, I wish they had a better artist, but that's kind of the luck of the draw with comics for the most part. They're not going to get Jim Lee or Gary Frank or Francis Manupal to do the art for a comic like Smallville, at least not unless it explodes in popularity.

I'm glad that she is back too, I can't wait to see how it all turns out. And yes, there will be some Jo'an time in the near future, I have an idea for a chapter that revolves around her, working out all of the kinks now. It's just one of my go-to lines about Oliver, haha. We'll get a mature chapter in the future, I've promised too many people I'd write one, but the muse has to talk first! haha. I did see the trailer, I can't wait to see it. I'm glad you liked it! I thought it was a big risk to write it like that, but it's been well received, so I'm very happy with it! Yeah, I came up with this idea of Lois kind of schooling the Kents, so it became that, hahaha. I'm glad you liked them all! Glad to have you back!

_**Bin82501**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Bruce/Diana, mentions of Chollie, mentions of Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season. I also do not own Castle or any of it's characters.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #103, Queen Industries

**Author's Note: **As you guys know, I've been working on a Batman story as well. I doubt I'll ever post it on here, but I used one of the scenes for this story, which is basically the first half with the second half written to make it fit into this story. Enjoy!

* * *

Bruce fell backwards onto the roof, grimacing.

He was sure that Bane was unconscious below. He did just get knocked off the roof of the Gotham City Police Department, not that the parking garage's roof was very far down. Probably would have killed a normal person, but Bruce was sure that Bane was just fine. Probably waking up to come kill him this second.

The sound of gravel scraping made him look over to see one of Bane's men coming at him with a gun, Bruce quickly ripped the batarang that Bane had stabbed him with out of his ribcage and threw it at the oncoming attacker. He fell backwards against an air duct and knocked himself out.

'_That worked out well..._' he felt a pain in his chest so he looked down. The wound was gushing with blood.

He could almost hear the british voice in the back of his head smirking, '_You were saying, Master Bruce?_'

The pain wasn't a problem, but the sound of S.W.A.T. flying up the stairwell was. Bruce lifted his fingers to his cowl, trying to radio back to the Bat Cave. He was hoping that Alfred wasn't upstairs making tea. This was barely going to work as is. "Alfred? Are you there?"

"I am here, sir."

Bruce grunted, "Can you send a supply drop to roof of the GCPD building?"

He started to unhook his grapple-gun as Alfred asked him if he had run out of eye-liner for his cowl, but he knew that Alfred had done it. He was good like that. Orders first, sarcasm second. "Not exactly, but you're probably going to want to get the medical station ready..."

"For what? Are you injured, sir?"

Bruce aimed the gun into the air, he could hear the supply drop falling to the roof which meant the jet was nearly overhead. "Not yet, but this is going to hurt..."

He shot the gun, and by some stretch of luck, it hit the jet and ripped him off the roof the exact moment that S.W.A.T. burst through the door and onto the roof. He held on for dear life as the jet ripped across the bay and down into the caverns that led to the Bat Cave. Using the recoil feature on the gun, he got as close as he could to the jet to avoid hitting the ground or any rocks that might be protruding from the ground.

As he saw the light of the cave, he timed it perfectly to let go slightly before the Batmobile. He didn't account for the fact that the jet was hurdling through the air at an ungodly speed though, causing him to crash into the windshield of the Batmobile and break the glass. He roll off the hood, nearly sliding off the platform.

Luckily, Alfred was there to grab his arm before his slid too far. Pulling him back a safe distance, he moved to check his wounds.

"Alfred..."

He leaned down to Bruce, fear stricken across his face. "What is it, Master Bruce? Where does it hurt?"

"Tell me... Tell me the... Tell me the security feed got that..."

Alfred's face twisted in confusion, "What? Why does that matter, sir?"

"Burn a... Burn a DVD... Send it to _Queen_..."

_**...Star City...Queen Industries...**_

"That was nothing!"

Bruce's jaw dropped, "_Are_ you _kidding_ me?"

Oliver shook his head and waved his arms, the guys just laughed at the two of them. They couldn't wait to hear this one.

"I carried that little chinese girl a mile to the hospital _after_ taking an arrow from Meryln through the lung, yeah, I said _through_ the lung. It was full of blood and everything, I almost died!" Bruce rolled his eyes dramatically. "You did what? Take a batarang to the ribs and go for a jet-ride? Big whoop. What are those batarangs even made out of of? Plastic? Did a bunch of kids make 'em in a sweat shop or something?"

"Oh, don't you even! WayneTech uses only the best materials, and built in the United States! And who was it that got the arrows from _Taiwan_ again?"

An '_oh-no-you-didn't_' glare set in on Oliver's face. "That was one time, and it was a _rush_ order!"

"I thought it was impressive."

The guys all looked back to see who just said that. Bruce smiled crookedly at Diana, "You think?"

She nodded before shrugging just a bit, "It's not as impressive as the time that I alone defeated Cerberus, the three-headed dog that guards the Underworld, when I went to rescue Hermes from Hades himself, but it was impressive, Bruce."

Everyone in the room stared at her for a moment, Bart whispered to J'onn, "Did she say that a three-headed chihuahua guards the Underworld?"

"Maybe you'd like to get coffee and swap war-stories?" smirked Bruce. "This was just the one I got video of."

Diana narrowed her eyes, a smile playing at the corner of her mouth. "I hope you can do better than that if you want to keep up with me, Rich Boy."

"Oh, I've got stories, Princess," he followed her out of the room. "Did I ever tell you about the time I caught Lois and Clark..."

His story tailed off as they left the room, leaving the guys to sit and wonder how Bruce manages to be the only one of them that ever gets to leave with the pretty girl. Oliver stood up and decided to address the room, "Ok, I just want to put this out there since I know we're all thinking it..."

They eyed him curiously for a moment.

"...I totally could have left with her if I wasn't married, I just think that needs to be said."

They all groaned loudly, "Are you serious, dude?" asked Bart. "You're so whipped, I don't think even _Clark_ isn't as bad as you."

Oliver's eyes got big as he approached Bart with fire in his glare, "Why I oughta-"

**_I can be your hero, baby... I can kiss away the pain... I will stand by you forever... You can take my breath away..._**

The guys broke into laughter as they realized that the song was Oliver's ringtone. Hal sang along out-of-tune and danced at his friend's expense.

"You guys are real mature...she's the one that made it play when she...you know what...just shut your faces..." He scowled at them as he answered, "Hi, sweetie. I know, I know, I'm supposed to be back for the start of the_ Real Housewives of Star City_-" He quickly covered the phone to shout, "Bart! Stop recording this!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I wanted to give ole Ollie and Bruce a chance to have one of their bicker-fests and something just sparked, haha. Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Not sure, I have a feeling it might be Wonder Woman related, though _Ace of Clubs_ is pretty close to getting done.


	204. Booster Gold

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - I know how much you love that image, so it was all for you, hahaha. Having Bruce and Ollie so competitive is one of my favorite things about writing this, so I love it too, haha. Uhuh, you're just bias, haha.

**_crazyhpcfan_** - Jo'an is like the only kid in the League, so they're all desperate for her approval, haha. There are only ever like a handful of children that really meet everyone, so it always seems to be a big deal, haha. Yup, Ollie and Bruce are just crazy, haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Wouldn't that be hilarious? haha. But nah, I think they'll just stick to Bro-mance, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever** _- They're definitely my #2 couple, hahaha. It's all her, I'm telling you. She is an incredible writer! I have been reading them too! I do the digit copies, which always leave me dying to know what is happening, and then get the paper copy. Whatever I gotta do to keep WB knowing that we love our Smallville. Hopefully Man of Steel tanks and they'll go, "when was the last time we made a ton of money off the Superman name? Maybe we should give those Smallville folks a movie!" hahaha.

I have an idea about the sink, but it's still developing, haha. It's definitely going to be an interesting one, haha. It's done in an unusual way for one of my chapters, but that's all I can tell you for now! hahaha.

_**potterhp** _- That is a promise that I can make! Little Jo'an will be heard from very soon!

_**alexindigo**_ - I did see the Avengers, several times I must admit, haha. I loved it! And yes, the Iron Man/Captain American relationship is very similar to these two. There is going to be a lot of Clois in these next few chapters, I've been missing them myself! haha.

I agree about the comics, they are far from spectacular. I'm still coming to grips with Lex not remembering. Feels like one of the most key parts of the show is now missing. And there has been far too little Clois so far. But I'll keep buying because I'm hoping that when Man of Steel tanks, they'll think back to the last Superman adaptation that made them money, and that'll be our Smallville! I won't give up hope on bringing this cast back together to bring the Last Son of Krypton to the big screen in style!

Awww, thank you! I try to make Jo'an feel special since she's one of the few characters that are made up around here! It means a lot to me that you guys care so much about her! I'll be around for a while, I have a big arc coming up!

_**cathy03**_ - Me too! haha. They are too much fun to write! I might have to write their own side story! hahaha.

_**White-Falcon-06** _- I'm glad that you liked it! I'm a huge Batman fan, so it was nice to get to write me some Alfred.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #204, Booster Gold

**Author's Note: **I'm back! haha. Actually, I've been back writing for a while now, just wanted to make sure I had a nice cushion so that I can keep posting on a semi-regular basis. Anyways, missed you guys, and I hope you like this one!

* * *

"And I'm Bruce Wayne."

Booster quirked an eyebrow, "Aren't you the one with the _Mickey Mouse_ ears?"

Bruce glared. "You're kind of a dick, you know that?"

"I..._love_ this guy," grinned Oliver, throwing his arm around Booster's shoulder. "Wanna be BFF's?"

Carefully peeling Ollie's arm off his shoulders, Booster gave him a strained look. "And you must be the Archer."

"The one and only."

Booster nodded, "I didn't recognize you without that squirrel you glue to your face while you're on duty."

Ollie gasped, "You did _not_ just go there, Frosted Tips."

"Seriously? _You_ are going to give him crap about _his_ hair?" asked Lois, a bemused smile on her face.

"Watch it, Legs!"

Bruce smirked, "I think I'm starting to warm up to this guy."

"And that's what he said to the Boy Wonder!" laughed Booster as he raised his hand. "Up top, who's got me? Come on!"

Ollie and Bruce exchanged quick looks, and the rest of the League knew to step back a bit. These two rarely saw eye-to-eye, but on those rare occasions when they did, all hell was bound to break loose.

"Hey Goldilocks," offered Ollie. "If you know the future and all, who's about to walk through that door?"

Booster glanced over towards the door before turning back, "What are you-"

_**BAM!**_

Bruce delivered a quick blow to Booster's jaw, sending Booster to the ground. "Oh snap! You just got _bat-slammed_!"

Cringing, Bruce shook his head, "Don't cheer for me... Makes me feel _dirty_..."

"Fair enough," conceded Ollie. He leaned over Booster, "How'd that feel Future Boy? Your little brains ok? I haven't seen this guy hit somebody that hard since Guy Gardner wouldn't shut his trap and ole Batsy had to clean his clock."

Booster slowly rose to his feet, "That's funny. I was about to ask if he was _Batgirl_, hits like a girl well enough."

Bruce started to snarl before Lois stepped in between them. "Now boys... What did I tell you about brawls in the Hall?"

Both Oliver and Bruce looked at their feet.

"_Brawls end with broken stuff and messes, and Ms. Lane likes a clean Hall..._" they repeated in unison.

Clark wanted to laugh, '_Has she seen her office? I reached into one of her drawers for a file the other day and got bit by what looked like a maple doughnut that had evolved into a higher life-form..._'

Booster smirked, "Yeah, why don't you two listen to the pretty lady?"

Lois turned on Booster with a glare. "You're the new guy, so I'm going to cut you a little slack here. First of all, don't call me pretty. See this big ring? It'll leave a mighty nasty dent in that big head of yours and I'd hate to let all the hot air out."

The Dynamic Duo did a little victory dance as Lois ranted. "And second of all, you _better_ listen to me too."

"Oh, is that so?" chuckled Booster. "And what happens if I don't?"

She smile sweetly without moving her glare from Booster's face, "Smallville, step over here, would you?"

Clark furrowed his brow, but did as he was told. He stood right next to Lois, whom made a motion with her finger for him to lean down to her level. She cupped her hand over his ear and began to whisper.

The next thing Clark knew, his eyes were burning bright red and Lois quickly grabbed his head and pointed it towards Booster. Beams of fire shot of Clark's eyes and blasted Booster through a couple of the walls behind him, coming to a sliding halt in the break room where he scared the hell out of Kara and Bart, whom had been making out on the couch.

"That's what happens!" Lois yelled. "You can clean this up when you're able to stand, broom is in the closet!"

The only response she received was a loud groan from Booster.

She quickly grabbed Clark's hand and dragged him past Oliver and Bruce, whom were laughing their butts off and bowing to her for she was their new hero. "Lois, Where are we going?" asked Clark as she pulled him along.

"Home, duh."

Clark frowned, "Why?"

"Who are you kidding, Smallville?" she smirked. "I'm no tease."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I have been wanting to write a Booster chapter for ages now, I just couldn't think of how to bring him into the fold quite yet. I also thought it'd be funny to have him offend Bruce and Ollie, forcing them to have one of their rare team-ups! haha. Anyways, let me know what you thought, your reviews are what keep me going!

**Next Up:** _Mon-El_.


	205. MonEl

**Review Comments:**

_**Mr. Wartburg**_ - There is a chapter where he returns to the group with Shayera, but I do intend to do some more Carter stuff in the near future since a lot of people were so fond of his relationship with Ollie and Jo'an calling him Uncle Tweety, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked it! Yes, Booster is going to have to learn that there is a reason why even _superheroes_ fear Lois Lane, hahaha.

_**Ocean's Eyes **_- They're always going at it, but it's so much fun! haha. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**Mpj891 **_- Thanks!

**_Katlynne_** - Oh dear, another crack-review, eh? hahaha. You better get back, I hope everyone reads my reply so that they know that you have a truly epic story coming along! Everyone should hit her stories and guilt her into her return!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It is good to be back! haha. Yeah, all along it has been my intention to have Booster meet either Bruce or Ollie, but in the end, I decided to have him meet both and spur one of those rare Ollie/Bruce team-ups, haha. I have had a note in my "Booster Ideas" folder for ages, and all it said was, "Bruce thinks that Booster is an ass." haha.

Yeah, I think he's going to be pretty happy being on the kiss side of things for a change, haha.

Oh, I would love to be in the writer's chair for that, I've been writing a Superman movie in my head for years! haha. Who knows, I have been looking at intern positions at DC Comics, maybe someday! haha. ;) And yes, I couldn't imagine writing a Superman movie that didn't star Erica Durance and Michael Rosenbaum in their iconic roles, and it'd be just all wrong with Tom Welling there too! haha.

I'm excited too because I want to see Superman with today's technology, flying and fighting and what not. I'm still a bit apprehensive about the way the suits look and what not, but we'll see when a longer trailer comes out! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Let's just say that Clark is going to be a very happy man, hahaha. Well, here's another! haha.

_**White-Falcon-06**_ - I have been working out some ideas for John, Kyle, and Guy a little bit. Nothing has really fallen into place though. I'm a big Hal Jordan and Kyle Rayner fan, so I'm sure we'll see something happen soon. John and Guy are very good characters, I just haven't had anything come along for one of them that I haven't used for a character I like more, if that makes sense? haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #205, Mon-El

**Author's Note:** Hopefully this one isn't too abrupt, it's a pretty straight forward character that gets summed up in the first few lines, it seemed like overkill to get into too much detail prior to this moment, but you never know! Enjoy!

* * *

Clark eyed him from across the room. He could practically hear that judging voice in his head.

'_Look, Smallville, this guy just...fell...from the sky. He doesn't remember where he is from, he doesn't even has a name!'_

_'I gave him a name to use. Mon-El.'_

_'You are always taking in strays, you know that? And don't bring up Shelby or Elmer is going on display for the Daily Planet to see. For all you know, he could be one of Zod's loser buddies. He has all the same powers as you, find out of if he is Kryptonian!_'

She wasn't even here and she made him roll his eyes. '_But what if he is?_'

'_Umm, then we Phantom Zone his ass!_'

'_Just because he might be Kryptonian, doesn't mean he is with Zod. He could be like Kara. A late arrival._'

He could hear her smirk in his head. '_What are the chances of that? Just find out already! I don't want my husband getting sucked into an inter-demensional prison again. I don't care what Perry says, I am not getting partnered with that blonde bimbo._'

Clark shook his head. '_She isn't even here and she still bosses me around._'

"Umm, just open the top shelf of the toolbox."

He looked at Clark blankly, "Why?"

"There is something in there that might point us in the right direction of figuring out who you are. Trust me?"

Pulling out the drawer and picking up the kryptonite, Mon-El looked back at Clark with a quirked eyebrow, "A rock?"

"Uh," laughed Clark. "It's a meter-rock. It was the only way I could tell if you were Kryptonian or not. Well, unless I took you to the Fortress, which I've learned the hard way that I should be more careful about giving directions to."

He gave him a funny look, "Whatever you say, Clark. I guess that kind of narrows it down."

Clark nodded. '_And tells me that you aren't from the Phantom Zone..._' He picked up the lead box from the shelf, "Here, you mind putting that back in here? That stuff doesn't really agree with me very much."

Mon-El caught it mid-air, but the moment it made contact with his hand, he fell to the ground in pain. "Oh...god...what was...what did you...what is happening to me? Clark...help me..."

Racing over to Mon-El's side, Clark knelt down with a look of panic stricken across his face. "Mon-El..."

They both look down at his left hand, which had a black sliver stuck in it. Slowly, a blackness grew around it. Before they knew it, his whole hand had turned entirely black and was shaking. "What is happening to me, Clark?"

"Hold on," frowned Clark.

Throwing Mon-El over his shoulder, Clark jetted through the sky. He could hear Mon-El's groans grow louder as he body shook harder and harder, Clark eyed his arm and saw that it was almost entirely black now.

The Fortress came into view, and Clark swooped down into it's main chamber. "Jor-El! I need your help!"

"Kal-El, my son. Why have you brought a daxamite here?"

Clark twisted his face into confusion, "A dax-, what is a daxamite?"

Mon-El moaned from the icy floor. "It's where I am from..."

"You remember? I thought you couldn't remember anything?"

The voice boomed from above. "The daxamite is infected with lead-poisoning, Kal-El. It is as poisonous to him as kryptonite is to yourself, my son. The reaction to the lead may have revealed his memories."

"I'm so sorry, Mon-El. I had no idea," apologized Clark.

"It's...ok, Clark...You couldn't have...known..."

Clark turned back to the Fortress. "Is there anything I can do to help him? The infection is spreading!"

He knelt back down to check how bad it was, it had overtaken Mon-El's arm and was moving up his neck. Clark didn't know a lot about alien physiology, but he knew that the infection moving to Mon-El's head couldn't be good.

"I do not possess a cure for this, my son... But there is a way to help him..."

"Anything!"

It was hard for a voice to show hesitation, but Jor-El managed it. "There is a way to stop the infection from spreading, and stabilize the daxamite until other measures can be taken. You must send him to the Phantom Zone."

"What? No! I can't send him there!"

Jor-El spoke quickly this time. "It is the only way to save your friend, Kal-El. The choice is yours."

"It's...ok, Clark...," groaned Mon-El. The blackness moved up the side of his face. "If it's the only way, send me...I can take it..."

Clark shook his head, "You don't know what that place is like, Mon-El...It's a dangerous place, you have no idea the kind of people that are in that place. It's not safe, not in your condition, trust me."

"You heard him...I will die if I don't..."

Standing, Clark moved to the console. "I will find a cure for you, I promise."

Mon-El nodded.

Moving the crystals around in the console, the passageway to the Phantom Zone opened up behind Mon-El. Clark gave him a long look, waiting for one last confirmation. When he nodded, "I'm ready...," Clark placed the last crystal into the console.

A light flashed, and Mon-El was gone.

Clark closed his eyes, "Is he safe? Can you see him?"

"I can, my son. He is fine. The poison has stopped. He is safe."

Nodding, Clark let out a sigh of relief. "I will find a cure, Mon-El. I _promise_..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? This was our introduction to Mon-El, whom was a character in the comics that Clark met in his youth and Mon-El had amnesia. The big difference is that Mon-El actually met Jor-El, he just didn't remember it, and hung out in Smallville for a good amount of time before being poisoned and regaining his memories.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked it. He will play a role in the next big arc I have coming up, so I wanted to introduce him to you guys. Hope you liked it, and as always, I look forward to hearing what you all thought!

**Next Up:** I'm putting my money on '_New York, NY_', but don't be surprised if it's something else! haha.


	206. New York, NY

**Review Comments:**

**_Jas-El_** - He is kind of a tricky character because he should have shown up while Clark was in Smallville, but I tried to make it work with our post-Season 10 Clark. It took so long because writing his "arrival" was just so boring, so I decided to kind of skip over it, hoping that it wouldn't be too out-of-the-blue to work. Looks like it came across alright though, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever** _- Don't worry, even I'm not completely versed in the tons of characters in the DC universe, haha. But yes, a Daxamite is very kryptonian like with the exception that they are allergic to lead. We will definitely see some more Mon-El in the future because he is part of an Arc that I have coming up, haha. So look for that! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan** _- He has spent nearly all of his time in the Phantom Zone, so not many people know about him, and when he finally gets out, it's not really part of the Superman story anymore, so he's kind of an unusual character. His origin is from Superman, but his "story" is in another title. You don't see a lot of characters like that, so it's unusual, but fun.

_**girlinflux** _- I'm glad that you liked it! I love me some Lois Lane, she's such a great character, and Smallville definitely did her justice. And if you like Lois, then you'll probably like my story, haha. She shows up quite a bit, haha.

_**NeverSayNever95** _- Awww, I'm glad that you liked it! I don't think you're cursed, I've just been crazy busy and I'm always worried that if I post, that I might disappear, and that seems worse than not positing for a while to make sure I stick around for a while, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I know exactly what I'm talking about! hahaha. I can roll them all I want! haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k** _- I'm glad that you liked it! And yeah, I find Mon-El to be a very interesting character because his story begins with Superman but ends up with another famous title. I hope to be able to give him his due.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Caskett

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season. I am also unfortunate enough to not own Castle or it's characters.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #206, New York, NY

**Author's Note: **So, this is a little chapter is kind of present of sorts for a special someone. She is a huge Castle fan, and for those who haven't checked it out, you really should. I mean, it's got the Real Captain Tightpants. What more do I need to say? haha. Enjoy!

* * *

Lois and Clark rounded the corner, and found her newest interviewee sitting waiting. "Mr. Castle?"

"Wow."

They frowned, the woman sitting next to him did as well. "What?" asked Lois.

"You're gorgeous." Both Clark and the woman sitting next to Castle frowned harder. Lois raised her eyebrow. "I've talked to a lot of pretty reporters in my time, but they must have something special in the water in Metropolis."

"Smallville."

Three sets of eyes turned to Clark. "She lives in Smallville. With me. Because we're married. She's my wife. I'm her husband."

Lois rolled her eyes, choosing to put a mental mark in the '_reasons to jump Smallville later_' column. The woman beside Castle stood up and brushed off her pants. "I'll be out in the hall, you let me know when you're done."

"Hey, Beckett!" She turned back to look at Castle. "Call me if somebody dies." She rolled her eyes and started to walk away again. "Or zombies! That was fun last time. The zombies, I mean, not the murder...that part was sad."

Lois gave him a look.

"They weren't _real_ zombies."

Clark rolled his eyes, "I think that I'll be going too. I uh, I have to _attend_ to something."

He followed Beckett out of the room, leaving Lois to sit down across from Castle.

"So, I was hoping to talk to you about your new Nikki Heat-"

"Actually..." interrupted Castle. "...I was hoping to talk to _you_ about something." Lois narrowed her eyes. "You're kind of the big confidante for the Big Blue Boyscout, right? You know, the Man of Steel, the Man of Tomorrow?"

Lois nodded. "We've met, yes."

"With all these superheroes coming out, I've been itching to right something...cape-y. I just haven't been able to come up with the right character, mainly because I haven't been able to come up with the right alter-ego," sighed Castle.

Her eyebrows shot up, causing Lois to mutter, "How about something like... _Stiletto_?"

Castle looked up, the smile that was all too familiar. It was the kind of smile a maniac might get right before he did something awful, but in Richard Castle's case, this was just the smile he got when he was so giddy he might wet his pants.

"That...is an _amazing_ alter-ego."

She grinned, "Really?"

"Imagine the book titles! Stilleto's Edge, Stiletto's Point, the books practically write themselves!" he ranted. "Please tell me that I can use this, just imagine how sexy the costume will look...That name is perfection! Exactly what I was looking for!"

Lois was literally beaming with joy. "I...am _so_ glad to hear you say that. Do you think you could tell my husband that?"

"You know, I would love if we could set-up another-"

"Castle. We've got a dead body. You coming?"

He pulled on his jacket as he chased after her, "Is it a fun dead body? Tell me it's dressed up like a knight from the round table. Oh, please tell me it's dressed up like- Why are you so tense?"

"I'm not tense."

Castle frowned, "You look tense. Is this because of the pretty reporter? Are you _jealous_?" he smirked.

Beckett growled under her breath, "Keep bringing her up and we're going to have _another_ dead body."

Lois walked out of the room, watching the novelist and cop rush out of the hotel lobby. She heard an all too familiar _Whoosh!_ and a gust of wind flying up behind her. She smirked to herself, knowing Clark had to be tingling with jealousy.

"I take it you were listening?" Clark nodded, pulling her along by her elbow. "You heard him flirting with me?" He nodded again. Her heels clacked almost as loudly as the smirk on her face as he pulled her towards the exit. "We're going to the hotel?"

Clark nodded, "Hold on tight."

**_a few days later. . . ._**

"Oliver Queen."

There was a cough on the other end of the phone. "Uh... Mr. Queen?"

His brow furrowed, it was like the man on the other end was hoping that Oliver wasn't going to answer. "This is him."

"Umm, this is Alex Reid with the Four Seasons in Manhatten...I believe that you rented a room here recently?"

Confusion set in for Oliver. '_I haven't been to New York in ages, what is he-_' Realization set in quickly. "Oh, yes, there was a reservation under my name, but it was for two friends. Kind of an anniversary present of sorts."

"Umm, well, since you're the name on file, I'm afraid that you're responsible for any damages to the room."

"Damages?"

Mr. Reid cleared his throat again. "Well, uh, the bed was broken. And the cot that was ordered in the middle of the night. There were also cracks in the bath-tub and the bathroom sink. Also...there were burns on the walls and ceiling. Concentrated burns."

'_What in the world where they-...Oh...Those horny little-_'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Like I said, this a special little present for someone, but I hope that you guys were able to enjoy it as well. Like I said, Castle is a great show and for many, this is the replacement for the irreplaceable Smallville. It stars Nathan Fillion, the star of my all-time favorite show Firefly, and is just all matter of awesome.

It also served as a "_have a non-evil-person have the hots for Lois and make Clark jealous_" chapter, haha. Anyways, let me know what you guys thought, I'm always looking forward to hearing from you guys!

**Next Up:** _LexCorp Legal_.


	207. LexCorp Legal

**Review Comments:**

_**Mr. Wartburg**_ - I have loved my Captain in pretty much everything he has done. From _Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place_ to _Firefly_ to _Dr. Horrible_ and _Castle_, the guy has a direct connection to my funny bone. Love the Captain.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - That's what future chapters are for! I've gotta keep you guys coming back! I'm glad you liked it!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**Katlynne**_ - You're talking crazy again, Lady... I'm glad you liked it, though.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - _Castle_ is just too awesome for words. I love that they always find a way to mention _Firefly/Serenity_ and of course the overall geekiness of Castle's personality always finds a way to leave me laughing my butt off, haha.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was unusual writing those two characters, but it was a lot of fun and I wouldn't be surprised if we see them again. I'd love to get my hands on ole Richard Castle's sense of humor around poor Clark Kent, haha. I'm glad that I could help and I hope that there will be plenty more where this one came from!

_**whynot1993**_ - They certainly had their fun, hahaha.

_**chestal**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I was worried about writing Caskett because I'd hate to get them wrong, but since so many people have liked it, I'm sure that we'll see them cross paths with old Hot Fudge and Halibut again, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever** _- Yeah? haha. I'm glad that you liked it so much! You have to start watching _Castle_! It's _sooooo_ good. And I think that if you like how I write, you'll definitely like the show. Very similar sense of humor. Plus, Nathan Fillion just makes me giddy with pure nerdiness. Yeah, I think those two would have pretty great chemistry, but Lois is all about the plaid, haha.

I got so many "_have Lois meet someone she can flirt with that isn't a crazed maniac_" requests that I honestly thought that Castle would be a great addition. I'm glad that it's been so well received! haha.

_**Diagnosis-MusicObsession**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! _Castle_ is amazing, so it can only make _Smallville_ better! haha.

_**Jas-El**_ - I absolutely adore the idea of Nathan Fillion as Green Lantern, even though I think he's too old now. He would have been amazing Hal Jordan in his _Serenity/Firefly_ days. And his voice as Hal in _Justice League: Doom_ and _Green Lantern: Emerald Knights_ was just about perfect. When I read the comics, I always imagine his voice in the same vein as Kevin Conroy as Batman.

I do have a Legion-related chapter on the horizon. Plus one where we'll see Mon-El again. But that is a good idea, and Lois would definitely have a field day with the residents of the 31st century, haha. I'll keep it in mind.

_**Tonyahuqt03**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! They're alike in a lot of ways!

_**girlinflux**_ - I was pretty proud of that line and that idea, I'm not going to lie, haha. After 207 chapters, you know when you were at your best, and I felt like that was one of my better moments. That's a good point, I'll have to keep that in mind for later on, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #207, LexCorp Legal

**Author's Note:** Alright, this is just a fun little piece, i think my new story-arc will be coming in the next chapter, but no promises just yet, I'm afraid. Still putting the final touches on some of the chapters, don't want to jump the gun. Enjoy!

* * *

Perry scribled into his little notebook.

A writer should never be without his notebook. He wasn't a writer anymore, he was editor-in-chief of the Daily Planet. But he still needed an outlet to put down his ideas. Sometimes a writer just needed to see all the pieces of the table.

He looked over the list he was making:

_**Keep Her:** Best writer. Good interviewer. Three Pulitzer nominations. Won't take 'no' for an answer._

_**Fire Her:** No boundaries. Inability to listen. Seventeen lawsuits. Won't take 'no' for an answer._

Casting a glance up, he saw Lois and her nostrils flare up. Anyone who knew anything about Lois Lane, knew that this was a bad sign. Not so much for her. This is when she turned things up a notch. But the other guy? He should worry.

"I've got him dead-to-rights on that, and he knows it! He was there!"

The lawyer that Lex Luthor had sent over to squash Lois' latest story rolled his eyes. "Mr. Luthor was on vacation on the dates in question, Ms. Lane. Your story barely clings onto your made-up facts as is."

"I've got pictures!" shouted Jimmy. "We saw Luthor with Corben! He was letting Corben into that facility!"

Perry signed and shook his head. '_Damn kid, I don't think I've ever seen anyone as loyal as he is to Lane and Kent._'

"I have seen the pictures, that could be anyone," argued the lawyer.

"The kid had to take the picture twice because there was so much glare coming off Mr. Clean's dome, that's a trademark Lex Luthor trait right there, unless LexCorp is employing the rest of the _Hair Club for Men_ cast," snapped Lois.

Now it was Clark's turn to step in. "If Lex has such a problem with us running the story, why isn't he here?"

"Mr. Luthor's whereabouts and schedule are none of your business, Mr. Kent. The fact of the matter is that Mr. Luthor is taking this matter very seriously, and he will press charges if this story runs and Ms. Lane continues to verbally assault my client."

Lois nearly snarled, "My lawyer-"

"You can hire all the Wayne Enterprises lawyers that your friend Bruce Wayne can find, but that doesn't change the fact that if you attempt to blame Mr. Luthor for the tragic accident that took place at the LexCorp facility when the criminal known as Metallo broke into a storage facility and injured those workers, we will prosecute you to the fullest extent of the law," chimed Lex's lawyer.

He held out a paper to Lois, whom started to chuckle. Both Jimmy and Clark grimaced. Laughter was never a good sign.

"What is this?" she growled.

"This is a document indicating that we have formally delivered our complaint to you," he explained. "You are to sign it, and if you do not restrain yourself from your slanderous articles and agressive verbal attacks on Mr. Luthor, we _will_ seek suit."

Lois grabbed the paper from his hand, spun on a dime and started to write. "You can take this, and tell Captain Chrome Dome that he can take his little threats, and shove them where the sun don't shine," she growled as she pushed the paper back into his hand.

He frowned as he read what she had wrote. "What is...'_I have a ponytail, and you don't, deal with it._' supposed to mean?"

"Just tell him that Bart filled me in. He will know what that means."

Shaking his head, the Lawyer tucked away the paper into his briefcase and turned to the door. Before exiting, he turned to give her one last look. "You were warned, Ms. Lane. You don't want to cross Lex Luthor, I assure you."

"You should be more worried about Lex crossing _me_."

Knowing that she wouldn't cave, he made his exit and left the trio in Perry's office. Jimmy was currently cheering on Lois while Clark had his infamous look of worry about his wife rattling the cage of one Lex Luthor.

Perry looked over the list he had made:

_**Keep Her:** Best writer. Good interviewer. Three Pulitzer nominations. Won't take 'no' for an answer._

_**Fire Her:** No boundaries. Inability to listen. Seventeen lawsuits. Won't take 'no' for an answer._

He loved and hated that about her. There wasn't a story on God's green earth that Lane couldn't get to the bottom of. She was just damn stubborn like that. But it also got her into more trouble than the pencil pushers in _Legal_ could handle.

Shaking his head slowly, Perry added another reason to the '_**Keep Her**_' list:

_No good place to hide her body._

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I was inspired by a scene from the comics and decided to run with it. Plus it never hurts to keep tabs on the fact that Lois is a thorn in ole Lex Luthor's side, haha. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it. I enjoyed bringing Perry back again, even though he doesn't really have a line in this one. He's still fun to have around, haha.

**Next Up:** There is a very good chance it will be _General Zod_, but don't be surprised if it's something else.


	208. General Zod

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! haha. Even though I personally favor _Secret Origin_ my favorite comic book origin for Superman, I do have some favorite bits from _Birthright_. To be honest, I have thought about Jo'an as a hero someday, but I haven't quite decided what to do with her quite yet. I know someone mentioned making Kara become SuperWoman and having Jo'an become the new Supergirl, but I haven't decided. I toyed around with the idea of her becoming Flamebird with Chris as Nightwing, but I like Thara too much.

_**White-Falcon 06**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I love me some Perry White, it's funny because I actually had written part of that chapter to be in a Perry White centric chapter, but it ended up becoming a LexCorp Legal story.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm starting. You're talking crazy. I try to put in hair jokes just for you, haha.

**NeverSayNever95** - I'm glad that I got you watch _Firefly/Serenity_! And there are sooooo many _Firefly/Serenity_ references on _Castle_, the biggest of course being when Castle dresses up as Mal for Halloween! hahaha. I'm glad that you liked the chapter!

_**whynot1993**_ - Kind of a kill-me/kiss-me deal, right? haha.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - She's certainly something, isn't she? haha.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I know, right?! haha. Lois Lane is single handedly keeping both LexCorp Legal and the Planet's Legal Department employed with all of her shenanigans! haha. She just can't keep herself out of trouble.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, I went with it here, so you won't have to wait very long! I've thought about AC a few times, but since he resurfaced with Mera, whom I really need to get into the story more often, I haven't been able to find good spots for it. As for Ollie, it's a full time job keeping the Dollie and Chollie fans happy, hahaha. They might kill me if I add another pairing for him, haha.

It's just a nice callback to when Lex told Bart that he wanted a pony tail, haha. Hilarious scene, hahaha. Yeah, I think Lois is only going to get more and more bold because she knows she's got backup now, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Yeah, that's probably my favorite line too, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Zod/Ursa

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #208, General Zod

**Author's Note:** This serves as a prequel/parallel to the _Christopher Kent_ chapter, and Part 2 of my **_Return of Zod_** storyline, making the _Christopher Kent_ chapter retroactively Part 2. Anyways, hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

They watched patiently.

Their eyes filled with hope, lacking the fear normal parents would have as they watch their child soar through the sky in a make-shift rocket. This was their chance. The boy was _special_. As far as they were concerned, this was his destiny. He was nearly out of their sight when a bright flash scorched across the sky, causing them to turn away for a moment.

When they gazed back up to the skies, they could see what looked almost like a hole torn into the skyline.

"He has done it, Ursa... Our son has escaped this wasteland..." he whispered. "Do you know what this means?"

She had tears in her eyes, but they weren't for her son.

"We are free, Ursa," he said in awe. "We are free! We will escape this wretched place, and we will return to Kal-El's _precious_ Earth. I will have my revenge. Both on him and Jor-El for his betrayal. And then, we will rebuild Krypton."

Ursa grinned with an almost manic expression. "We will destroy the humans."

"No," Zod's grin was ear-to-ear, "They will kneel before us, my Queen. As our slaves. Our slaves to rebuild our home. But the ones that don't, the ones that resist, like Kal-El and his friends... we will pave the roads of New Krypton with their bodies, my Love."

He grabbed her hand and signaled to the skies, and swiftly, three wraiths appeared. They were just a few of the wraiths that had pledged it's allegiance to the General on the promise that he would free the Zoners from this barren wastelands.

"Non, Ursa..." he said as they raised their hands. "...let us find our son, and then the son of Jor-El."

A wraith gripped each of their hands and ripped them into the skies, towards the rift. Zod remembered the events that led to this moment. A chain of events that even he could not have foreseen occurring.

_"Who walks freely in my dominion?" questioned Zod from the shadows. "Who goes there?"_

_The figure stepped from the shadows. Zod recognized the pattern glowing red across it's forehead. A sly smile grew. "I believe that you know who I am, General. Admittedly, you possess a new life within you, but still one should recognize me all too well."_

_"Of course I remember you, but I was led to believe that the Brain-Interact Construct was destroyed."_

_It's green face almost smirked. "I was merely delayed."_

_Zod stepped towards it, placing his hand on Brainiac's shoulder. "Tell me, how did you arrive here? Kal-El destroyed the crystal. We haven't had a visitor in quiet some time, and all of my efforts to escape have failed thus far."_

_"Kal-El knows not the many doors to the Phantom Zone."_

_"You can liberate us? You can free us from this hell?"_

_Brainiac shook his head. "I cannot. I pass freely because I am neither living nor prisoner to this place. You would not survive it, and even if you could, the tether would pull you back. But you can escape. You simply lack the information to free your people."_

Zod would learn that a child born in the Phantom Zone could escape it. They had spent months combing the wastelands for material to build his vessel. The vessel for their freedom. His child had left a rip as he broke out of their glass cage. The tether keeping his people prisoners was no more. As long as his son was gone, the Zone will remain in disrepair.

And Zod had no intention of ever bringing Lor-Zod back to this place, nor himself. They had a mission now.

"Follow me, my brothers!" he screamed.

Beaming back at the Phantom Zone for what he swore would be the last time, he saw the other wraiths carrying his army towards the sky. A glorious sight for a General planning war. His men would follow him now, and in time, he would send vessels for the wraiths.

With Zoners following behind, Zod bellowed to his troops. "Follow me to Earth! To our New Krypton! To Kal-El's death!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, finally a continuation of sorts to the _Christopher Kent_ chapter. Even though this is more of a prequel/parallel story, haha. This sets up Zod's return, as well as connecting to finding that Brainiac (_kinda_) brings Zod back. This is going to be a multiple chapter arc, similar to how I did _the Death of Superman_ arc. I haven't really decided if I'll post them one-after-the-other, or split them up a bit to give us some humorous chapters in between like I did with _TDoS_.

Anyways, let me know what you guys thought, and for right now, there will be a non-_Return of Zod_ chapter before we get Part 3. But let me know what you thought in the reviews! Can't wait to hear your thoughts!

**Next Up:** _Olsen!_


	209. Olsen!

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne** _- You can't punish me. I punish you, remember? ;) I'm rolling my eyes at that last bit, I hope you realize that. Proof that you are absolutely wacked out of your mind, you.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k** _- I'm not sure if Ursa and Lois are going to cross paths, but Lois might cross paths with someone even scarier when it's all said and done. I guess we'll have to wait and see, there are parts that aren't written yet.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm glad that I have you intrigued, haha. This will take place when Lois and Clark are married, and they have already had Jo'an since it follows the _Christopher Kent_ chapter. It's based on a little bit from the comics that my dear old Geoff Johns and Richard Donner wrote, hopefully I'll be able to do it justice! And yes, Jo'an will appear soon, I have a few ideas for the little bundle of trouble. Keep your eye out for them!

_**crazyhpcfan** _- That's the reaction I was going for! haha. Stay tuned for more!

_**cathy03** _- Hey, Stranger! I know all about real life becoming hectic and keeping us away from the more enjoyable aspects of our lives. I'm glad that you've liked these, and I'm especially glad that you liked the Castle/Smallville crossover! I was a little worried about how that would be received, so it's great to hear you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #209, Olsen!

**Author's Note: **I had myself an idea, and I ran with it. Hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

It was one of those rare nights.

Clark could lean against the railing of the roof of the Daily Planet, recently installed due to the all-too-frequent dramatic falls off the roof that had occurred the past few years, and he heard... well, _nothing_. No sirens. No screams from alley-ways. Just the buzz of his city.

Sometimes just _knowing_ that Superman was around kept the crime rate down.

Not that a crime rate would ever stop him from trying. A crime rate was just a _number_. And he didn't believe in numbers, he believed in people. And one person suffering, was one too many for Clark's taste. He took it all too personally. Every mugging, every car-jacking, every dollar bill missing from a bank. He couldn't save everyone, that was just a cold hard fact.

'_The moment I believe that, is when I stop trying,_' he reminded himself. _Constantly_.

Lois had made many a speech when Clark found himself down in the dumps. She was the one that picked him up and dusted him off when she found him beating himself up. When the city whispered about Superman failing, when it got on his back, she was the one that put it all in perspective for him.

She was the one that gave him the old head tilt, coupled with a '_Now stop brooding and up, up, and away already_. _I think I hear someone stealing Lex Luthor's purse,_' before giving him that Lois Lane smile. His thoughts drifted to her.

He could imagine her laying in bed. Wrapped up in that silly Superman t-shirt she had to have. He wondered if she had her arm draped across the bed this time, or maybe around a pillow. She always searched for him in her sleep, even when she knew he'd be on patrol. It made him smile. He just hoped that Shelby didn't steal his spot again.

Lois wasn't fond of waking up next to Shelby, no matter how much they cuddled in her sleep.

His thoughts were cut off as the door to the roof blew open, swinging widely and smacking against the brick wall. Clark turned quickly, but found himself staring at Jimmy Olsen, whom was clenched up in panic. "I didn't think it'd open that fast."

Clark eased and smiled, "Stop the presses, I think we've found out Superman's true identity."

"I wish," chuckled Jimmy. "Maybe then Mr. White would cut me some slack."

"Something wrong?"

Jimmy sat down, pulling his camera off his neck and setting it down. "I wanted to be a photographer. Like _Henry_. But sometimes I forget that he was special. I mean, he got out of Oklahoma City all on his own. My brother was special, maybe I don't have what it takes."

"That's not true-"

"But it is, CK. I just can't seem to make Mr. White happy. He's always upset that my pictures are out of focus, or that they're too far away and you can barely make out the cape. I hate to say it, but the guy is faster than a speeding _bullet_. He's hard to catch."

Clark looked down at the ground. He moved to sit down next to Jimmy. He tried to stay away from photographers. It was one thing for the people on the street to see his face, it was another thing for his face to be on the front page of the Daily Planet where everyone dying to find out Superman's alter-ego could look up from his mugshot and see Clark Kent standing across the room.

"I just feel like the city is so scary sometimes, and the Daily Planet is so..._big_."

"You know, a lot of times I worry about living up to the expectations that my dad had for me. In a lot of ways, I feel like I've already let him down..." Clark explained. "I gave up the farm to be a reporter. I wonder all the time what he'd think about that."

Jimmy snorted, "On the plus side, it got you out of all that plaid that Lois always complains about."

Clark smirked, "That plaid all disappeared because it's all on her side of the closet now, Jimmy."

"I'd pay to get a picture of that," he laughed.

"Sometimes I think back about the farm. I think back about why it was so important to my Dad," explained Clark. "It wasn't about the farm. It was about teaching me about hard work, and ethic. My Dad wanted me to learn what it meant to work for something, so that I'd take that with me, where ever I ended up. He believed in me, he just wanted to have the tools to live my dreams."

Jimmy hung his head a bit. "My dad just drank and yelled."

'_Smallville, the city is hard on you because they know how great Superman can be. Their expectations are impossible, because they know that you are the only one that can do the impossible..._' he could hear her voice in his head.

Clark smiled, "You have to know that we all believe in you, Jimmy. Even Perry. He knows that you have potential. Incredible potential. He is hard on you because he wants to push you. He wants to push you to be the photographer that we all know you could be. He's trying to give you the drive and the determination to become the best photographer this newspaper has ever seen."

"You really think that, Clark?"

Squeezing his shoulder a bit, he smiled. "We all do."

Police sirens broke their little moment. Clark smiled at Jimmy. "You know what that means."

"It means I better get my butt to my scooter and get tomorrow's front page picture," grinned Jimmy, his confidence renewed. He tore off towards the door, slinging his camera around his neck with a fluid swing.

Clark looked off in the distance, his tie slightly looser than a moment before, "Hey Jimmy..."

He turned back to Clark for a second.

"...if you hurry, who knows, you might just get that picture of _Superman_ you've been after."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I had this idea about Clark getting down on himself about things that he can't prevent, and then for some reason, I got this idea about Jimmy and Clark using Lois' advice to help him out. This is what came out of it, so hopefully you guys liked it! Let me know what you thought via review!

**Next Up:** _Geo-Thermal Facility_.


	210. GeoThermal Facility

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - You're full on crazy, and I have the evidence to prove it, so don't you be starting with me. I still don't understand why you're melting away, haha. I'm rolling my eyes right now, and you know why. Crazy.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I know, right?! haha. His plaid ratio goes way down, even when at the farm, and her's just sky-rockets, haha. It's just one of those things, I guess, haha. I'm glad you liked the chapter though, I enjoyed writing.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - There is a scene in Secret Origin when Jimmy is thinking about going back home because he feels like he can't hack it, I definitely see the similarities, and I might have been partly inspired by it. I'm usually inspired by things I've read recently, and I'm getting a busy of mine into Smallville, so I have been telling him about Secret Origin because I consider it the _true_ Superman origin.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, that's something that I loved and hated about Smallville. I was really disappointed to see Jimmy roughly the same age as Lois and Clark, but I loved _that_ Jimmy. I could have done with a little more Jimmy from Superman Returns at times, but overall, I was a big fan of that Jimmy. I think my Jimmy is basically a younger clone of Henry, haha. At least I like to think he is, just a little bit nerdier, haha. I'm glad that you liked their conversation, I think Jimmy wants to live up to Henry like Clark does to Jonathan.

I'm re-watching the whole Smallville series with my roommate, so I've been itching to write Lois lately, she just makes me giddy with the things that she says, so I'm glad that you liked her little tidbits in this one, haha.

_**Speed Reader**_ - I'm glad that you've enjoyed these! I love writing these, and I love hearing back from my readers, so feel free to let me hear it, good or bad, in the future! Hopefully I'll keep you entertained a good while longer.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I love writing me some Jimmy!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** None.

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #x, the LexCorp Geo-Thermal Facility

**Author's Note:** This serves as a prequel to the Death of Superman storyline. Enjoy!

* * *

"I don't understand, why are we even here? I thought this place got red-taped or something?"

Hank shrugged, "There was an incident way back when. Something about an explosion or some kind of industrial accident. They probably ended up hitting a pocket of gas or something that damaged the drilling equipment. Whatever it was, there must be something down there worth finding if Luthor is willing to spend the money to reopen it."

"That is exactly why we are here," echoed a voice from behind.

Hank and his curious associate turned to see Lex Luthor, the company's CEO standing behind them. "What is down there will change the world. _Forever_," explained Lex. "I was so close once before, I won't fail again."

With a nudge, Jerry whispered to Hank, "I thought that he was, you know..._dead_...when all that stuff went down?"

Hank shrugged.

"How has the drilling progressed? I hope that we are close?"

"We've managed to drill through the rubble, and we're back in the original tunnel's track. Our sensors are picking something up down there but we've been unable to determine what it is. It's got a heat signature, but it's not strong enough to be magma."

Lex grinned, "No. I should think not."

Confusion set in for the two LexCorp employees, but they choose not to ask. People who asked questions tended to disappear in this company. "Alright, let's slow her down, I don't want to hit something if we don't have to. Bring her down to minimum speed."

Jerry started to pull the lever back, slowing the drill.

"No."

He looked up to see Lex standing over him, "Wha-"

Lex leaned over him and jammed the level forward, causing the drill to speed up and crash deeper into the tunnel. "Mr. Luthor! You can't do that!" Jerry shouted, trying to rip Lex's grip from the lever. "Mr. Luthor!"

With almost no effort, Lex's free hand whipped back and gripped Jerry by his neck.

Hank watched on in horror as he heard the _snap_, watching his co-worker fall to the ground limp. He moved to try and take a step towards Lex, but came to a stop as the ground shook beneath his feet. Hard enough to topple him over.

Panic set in as the ground shook, "Mr. Luthor! What the hell is going on?"

Lex simply smiled to himself. "Hell _indeed_."

A loud roar erupted from deep in the well. It had taken days, but they had finally reached it. Hank watched as each of the monitors turned to white noise static. The roar grew louder with each passing moment, which each passing _climb_.

"Sir! We need to evacuate! We need to get out-"

"Silence."

Hank's face twisted up in confusion. "I don't understand! What is _that_? What is going on?"

Lex grinned, "Something wonderfully monstrous."

A dark grey claw shot up out of the hole where the drill sat. It was attached to an arm and an elbow with massive protruding bones, with a quick jerk, the drill bent under the force of it's assault. Hank couldn't move as he froze in fear.

It slowly climbed out of the hole, roaring with a furious might. "Oh...god..."

The monster swatted Hank away, sending him into the control panel. Blood gushed from his mouth as he slumped down, dead. The monster quickly turned it's gaze onto Lex. He stood still, a confident smile on his face.

"Do you remember me?"

It's eyes bore into Lex. Almost like it was seeing beyond him. Through him. It growled, but didn't move.

"Maybe this will help..." he almost cooed. Lex took a step forward, and his skin, it started to move. First, into a shiny liquid of some kind. Then it slowly changed, becoming something else entirely. The monster recoiled ever so slightly, but it recognized him.

It recognized him from a memory. A memory from a different life that had taken place a long time ago. It was a lot warmer in that tunnel than it was in that _Ice Fortress_. And without that human side to hold it back, it wouldn't be stopped this time.

Stepping forward, Brainiac grinned. "Your destiny has arrived... _Ultimate Destroyer_. Kill the other Kryptonian."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think of Doomsday's return? haha. I thought it'd be a good tie-in for how Briainiac brought back Doomsday, in the same vein of how Brainiac brought back Zod, while also being a "how Doomsday showed up in TDoS" arc.

For those of you that might have forgotten, Doomsday was buried in Lex's Geo-Thermal Facility in the Season 8 finale. So this is how he comes to resurface and be another thorn in Clark's side. It was just another one of those ideas that I get and decided to work into chapter and part of the TDoS arc. Anyways, I hope that you guys liked it, let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Momma Lois_.


	211. Mama Lois

**Review Comments:**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - He has kind of become my scapegoat for bringing all the baddies back, hasn't he? haha. But I've got to bridge the gap between Smallville Superman and the comics Superman, right?! haha. I'm working on chapters for the ideas we talked about via PM, and I do have nice chapters shaping up for both Canary and our resident tech wizard Cyborg, so keep an eye up!

_**Katlynne**_ - Hush, crazy lady, haha. You get chills from the wind blowing! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, we've mostly seen Doomsday's story in the Death of Superman arc, but I'd never say that we're done seeing him show up in Clark's life. He's kind of a big bad, haha. There will be a very juicy chapter coming up about Brainiac, and why he might just be one of Clark's biggest all-time foes in terms of never actually getting stopped, so watch out for that one! haha.

_**cathy03**_ - He has to wake up so he can kill Clark in the Death of Superman! haha. Yeah, I wasn't a fan of how that all went down, but at least when you guys march on WB so I can make a Superman movie, we'll have a two hour long battle! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #211, Mama Lois

**Author's Note:** Part 3 of the _**Return of Zod **_storyline. Sorry I've been gone so long!

* * *

First he watched the nervous red haired boy.

'_He keeps talking about how he is going to be my uncle. Mama Lois doesn't seem to like that,_' he thought to himself.

Then he saw the big TV's that were over the cubicles and desks. He saw a bunch of people in costumes, like the one that Papa Clark was wearing when he found his ship. '_I wonder if he knows these guys...They're all wearing masks though...Cept the lady..._'

"_Members of the Justice League helped take care of a threat in Central City today,_" chimed the reporter. "_Among the heroes were Star City's own Green Arrow, as well as Central City's Flash and Gotham's Dark Knight himself, Batman._"

"Wait, Mom, who is Batman? Is he the one you always make the bull-horns for when you talk about him?"

Lois nodded.

"When can I meet him?"

"Not until you're sixteen."

Chris twisted his face up in confusion, "Huh?"

Lois waved her finger, "Him and the other uncles already spoil Jo'an, I'd like to have at least one _normal_ child, Chris."

He shrugged and looked up at the news screen again, "_The trio seemed to have their backs against the walls, facing down the threat of the Rogues. In the end, Washington's Wonder Woman showed up to push the good guys over the top and save the day._"

Chris tilted his head, "So, who is Wonder Woman?"

"Someone you're not meeting until you're eighteen," she told him before muttering, "I don't need anymore broken beds."

Chris shrugged, so Lois just rubbed his little head. '_I might actually get away with these empty threats with this one. No Smallville genes to make him unruly. Because that's gotta be where Jo'an gets it. Can't be from me. It can't._'

"Alright, Kiddo, work is all done here. I believe I promised you a trip to the zoo," she grinned.

He pumped his fist into the air, "Yes!"

She rolled her eyes with a laugh. Smallville was already rubbing off on him. There was a slight pang of guilt that they were going without Jo'an to the zoo, but she was in school. They were still waiting for Bruce to come up with the proper papers for little Chris before they could enroll him in school. Not that the little Monster was going to see the sense in that.

'_I'm sure that there will be a right hissy-fit when she gets home. Also something she got from Clark. Definitely._'

_**the Metropolis Zoo. . . .**_

"This is the coolest thing ever!"

Lois rolled her eyes with a chuckle, "Wait until you see your Dad's collection of creepy critters up North."

"Huh?"

"Don't worry about, you'll see it soon enough. But if you get nightmares about creepy crawlers, he is the one who is going to rock you back to sleep at night, deal?" she asked. He thought she was joking, but she looked dead serious.

Chris nodded slowly, "If you say so, Mom."

Lois beamed, "That's a good boy. And while we're at it, never..._ever_...tell me you can't get sick, ok?"

"But I _can't_ get sick."

She grumbled under breath, "Not another one..."

Suddenly, there was a flash in the sky. When her vision returned, she saw hundreds of people flying down from the sky towards the city. If she squinted, she could recognize the fashion choices of this collection of frequent fliers.

Pulling out her phone, she made to dial Clark's number.

"Mama Lois! Look! There he is!"

She turned to see Clark flying their way, decked in the red-and-blues. He hovered for a moment near them. Peering off into the distance to try and make out what was going on. Lois shouted up at him, "What is it?"

Clark looked down with a worried look, "Zoners."

Lois paled, "Not..."

"I don't know. I have to go, get out of the city, Lois."

And like that, he jetted off towards the oncoming Zoners. Lois looked down at Chris with a worried expression. Zoners almost always meant one thing, and he wouldn't be too happy about Lois and Clark adopting their son.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to let anything happen to you," she cooed.

He twisted up his brow in confusion, "What about him? Is he going to be ok?"

When Lois didn't answer back right away, and when he saw the fear in her eyes, Chris knew that Papa Clark wasn't going to be ok. How could he? There were so many of them and only one of Papa Clark. He decided what he needed to do.

Chris ripped his hand from her grip, "I have to go help, Papa Clark!"

"No! Christopher! Get back here!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Having a child with gifts like the ones that Chris or Jo'an had made it very difficult to control them, especially when either one of them could lift a car by the time they could walk.

He floated in the air, "Don't worry, Mom. I won't get hurt! I'm the son of Superman!"

Before she could shout, he was gone. Flying off to find Clark and help him with whatever the hell was going on.

She heard the familiar sound of a military chopper flying overhead towards the old Fort Reeve, and she knew that a situation like this meant only one thing. '_I think that it is time for me and dear old Dad to have a conversation..._'

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? This was the next installment of the '_Return of Zod_' storyline, and I used one of my favorite bits from the comics to influence this particular piece of the story. Hopefully you guys enjoyed getting to see Lois with Chris here, they really do have one of the best relationships from the comics. Lois got attached very quickly to young Chris.

Anyways, the action begins in the next chapter of this story, but since I disappeared for so long, I have decided to throw in a fun chapter to go with this one to keep you guys from killing me, haha. I kind of lost track of time, I hadn't realized it had been so long, so please try to remember that when you're lighting your torches and sharpening your pitch-forks, haha.

Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Seven Years_.


	212. Seven Years

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Halls

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #212, Seven Years

**Author's Note:** This takes place shortly after Carter and Shayera's return in chapter #38, _Shayera_.

* * *

"So how was the wedding?" Carter turned to Shayera, "They were about to get married right before I died."

Shayera nodded and looked to Clark and Lois expectantly, expecting to see them beaming with happiness at the memory of their special day together. Instead, she saw an awkward Lois and a Clark pretending to see something off in the distance.

"Well?" asked Carter, his ever present frown deepening.

Lois flapped her mouth, nothing came out. Clark decided to save her. "It's actually...you know...it's actually a funny story."

Carter and Shayera shifted looks. "A funny story? You two did are married, right?"

Lois held up her hand, "Yup! We definitely got married..." she turned her head and mumbled, "..._eventually_..."

"Eventually?"

"Well, there was a wedding. That did, you know, happen. But uh... Oliver kind of... Well, it wasn't really, _him_, exactly. He kind of got sucked into the whole, Darkseid taking over the world thing..." rambled Clark.

Carter rolled his eyes, "Leave it to Mr. Green-Jeans to break up a wedding."

Shayera shook her head at her husband, "But you two got married shortly after."

Their timing could have been better as Carter raised his glass to take a sip of his drink, "Uh, I don't know if shortly is the word..." laughed Clark nervously. "It was what? I don't know, ummm, seven years later?"

Spitting his drink out, Carter shouted, "Seven _years_?!"

"It wasn't my fault!" shouted Lois, causing Clark to turn with big eyes and a slacked jaw. It was now his turn to flap his mouth, only to have nothing come out. "What?! It's your day job that kept breaking the date, Smallville!"

Clark shook his head wildly, "What about May of 2014? You just haaaaaad to cover that Eiffel Tower story, didn't you?"

Lois gave him the ole '_oh-no-you-didn't_' look, "And where were you when I was covering that story? Oh, yeah, I remember now. You were off playing in the inter-galactic sand box with those weirdos with the _ring_ fetish."

"I was back in time! The wedding was in the afternoon, I was back by brunch. Everything would have been fine if you hadn't gone and made us run into Bizarro, it took me a week to clean up Paris after that! I might as well have let that bomb gone off!"

"Children, Children!" shouted Carter, trying his best not to laugh. "You're going to wake up Jo'an..."

Lois huffed, and Clark took a long breath to try and calm himself down.

"Needless to say, we were a little busy. But we got married eventually, and even though it took seven years, it was worth it."

A twinge of red slowly spread over Lois' features as she merely added a, "Mhmm..."

Lois twisted lightly in her seat with her phone, "Oh, that's funny, looks like I've got an email. I'm always getting those emails. They're like regular mail, but for your phone. Or your computer. Oh, well, my inbox is all cleaned out now."

_**buzz...buzz...**_

Sliding his phone out of his pocket, Clark's eyes got big as he looked to Lois, whom gave him a funny look. He suddenly coughed nervously, unconvincingly, "Uh...big...fire...in Metroplis. Gotta run!" he finished awkwardly.

"Yeah and, uh...I have to walk Shelbs. So, that's where I'll be..." Carter and Shayera stared at her. "...not that you asked..."

Both of them bolted for the back door, tripping over each other. Carter narrowed his eyes, "You need help, Clark?"

"What? Oh, no, it's a little fire, nothing...you know...that I'd need help with. Just...just a little fire."

Lois grabbed Clark by his jacket, "Don't forget to get your...suit...from the Loft...you know...in the _Loft_?"

"What are you, I'm already wear- Oh..." His eyes literally sparkled mischievously, "How could I forget about my..._suit_...in the _Loft_...?"

Carter rolled his slowly, he had an inkling about what was really going on here. He shook his head slowly as they nearly broke down the screen on their way out. Clark used his heat vision to patch the hinge, "Good as...well, it works..." He was gone in a flash.

"I don't know how they find any time for themselves, they really _are_ busy."

Carter chuckled lightly, "I think they manage."

"Hmm?"

He pointed towards the rug by the front door, "Shayera, come on, she forgot to take the _dog_..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I just finished re-watching the whole series of Smallville with a buddy and he was like, "what the hell? Why did they wait seven years?!" and I just had to write this, haha. Anyways, let me know what you guys thought, I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts on both this and _Mama Lois_, so hop to it! haha.

**Next Up:** Either _Metallo_ or _Alfred_, you guys pick!


	213. Alfred

**Review Comments:**

**_Jas-El_** - I'm glad that you enjoyed it! I think they went seven years to kind of say, "_well, we gave room for the stuff from the movies or comics to happen since so many people were pissed that we changed things_", which I thought was really unnecessary because _Smallville_ needs to be treated as it's own "Earth" if you will.

99% of the reasons people hated _Smallville_ was because they couldn't see it as it's own thing. I ended up going with Alfred since I figure that _World War 3_ is going to be a little on the serious side.

_**alexindigo**_ - No problem! I completely understand that! haha. You will get your steam when I finally post the Red-K chapter! I promise! haha. I'm glad that you enjoy my Lois, and yes, it's hard to improve upon what Erica Durance gave us, I don't think there's ever been a character done more truly to the source material in my eyes, haha.

I am following Season 11, doing my best to keep sales up by buying both digital and paper copies, praying that Man of Steel tanks and we get our Smallville movie, haha. And uh, well, you'll see my thoughts on WW/SM below, haha.

_**Ocean's Eyes**_- Like I was telling _Jas-El_, I've rationalized it as the writers saying, "_well, we gave room for the stuff from the movies or comics to happen since so many people were pissed that we changed things_", which I thought was really unnecessary because _Smallville_ needs to be treated as it's own "Earth" if you will. 99% of the reasons people hated _Smallville_ was because they couldn't see it as it's own thing.

_**Lilbit4**_ - I'd love to write for DC, haha. And yes, there really is only one Lois Lane. Luckily, she isn't going anywhere.

_**whynot1993**_ - Like I was telling _Jas-El_ and _Ocean's Eyes_, I've rationalized it as the writers saying, "_well, we gave room for the stuff from the movies or comics to happen since so many people were pissed that we changed things_", which I thought was really unnecessary because _Smallville_ needs to be treated as it's own "Earth" if you will. 99% of the reasons people hated _Smallville_ was because they couldn't see it as it's own thing.

_**h-g-j-l-e-r-k**_ - Exactly, haha. Couldn't possibly be a Lane thing, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_- I'm sorry to hear that! Hopefully I can cheer things up with another chapter! haha. Yeah, Chris wasn't around long in the comics, but I sure loved what he and Lois developed in their time together. It was really great.

I was telling the folks above that the only thing I can figure is they said, "_well, we gave room for the stuff from the movies or comics to happen since so many people were pissed that we changed things_", which I thought was really unnecessary because _Smallville_ needs to be treated as it's own "Earth" if you will. 99% of the reasons people hated _Smallville_ was because they couldn't see it as it's own thing. It's shame they couldn't just enjoy it for what it was.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - No worries! I'm glad that you enjoyed them! Mhmm, Lois can't be the crazy one. She can't, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - You is crazy, you know that? Sorry I didn't go to bed, I wanted to get this out first! I'm going to bed now!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:**

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #213, Alfred Pennyworth

**Author's Note: **Just a little something I came up with after a debate about _the Dark Knight Rises_, hopefully you guys like it and hopefully I have readers still after the statement I make after the Author's Note, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"Owls?"

Bruce growled under his breath, "It wasn't like that."

"I hope not, because that sounds like a cake-walk compared to the crap that I've seen. There's this one planet, way on the other side of the sector, that looks like Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory on acid," quipped Hal.

"The Court was just one facet. They had reanimated corpses, trained assassin corpses at their command," explained Bruce.

Hal twisted up his face, "Like zombies? Isn't that a little..._comic book-ie_?"

With a shrug, "Coming from an space-cop with a magic ring? And need I remind you about _Blackest Night_?"

"Touche."

"I'm still not sure what the far-fetched part of that is: the fact that the Green Lantern Corps exist, or that they chose _you_." Hal glared, but Bruce continued on. "Besides, I put away a giant clay-monster the other day. I'm over the strange and unexplained."

Hal nodded and sipped his coffee, "I'm about over the little smurfs and that bullshi- Oh hey there, Alfred!"

Alfred looked down on the man in the bomber jacket. "Ah, Master Hal, I thought that the foul language bellowing through the manor might be coming from you. I'm glad to see you haven't had your arms pulled off by a Wookie yet."

Smirking, Hal turned to Bruce. "Did Alfred just reference Star Wars? Because if he did, I'm calling Barry."

"Master Richard has taken it upon himself to teach me the finer points of what it means to be..._cool_," explained Alfred. "Which reminds me, Master Hal, I now know what the moniker you used for me the last time you visit means."

Hal frowned, not quite remembering what Alfred was talking about.

"I believe the term of endearment was, _C-3PO_?"

Flinching, Hal waved his hands. "That is a beloved character and totally a compliment...but seeing that giant vein in your forehead about to burst, how about I just make it up to you instead?"

"How do you plan on doing that?"

_**twenty minutes later. . .** ._

"Amazing," sighed Alfred.

His feet up on the table, a cup of tea perched in his lap, he admired his little green workers go. It was like his own personal army of little Alfred's, doing his bidding and leaving him plenty of time to read the Gotham Gazette.

"I sure do miss that, Miss Vale," he sighed, giving Bruce an all-to-unsubtle look.

Bruce rolled his eyes. "I didn't know that you could duplicate your ring like that."

"Yeah, just a little trick I learned from the ole pink fella who puts the _dick_ in _dictator_. I figured Alfred could use a hand around here since you're been a dick yourself and had him cleaning this place solo for the last twenty years," jabbed Hal.

Shaking his head, "It keeps his mind off me dying in a gutter."

Hal smirked, "With only batarangs at your disposal, I'm not surprised he hasn't had a breakdown. It's bad enough that we already had a guy who can't really do anything in the League," he quipped with a smack to Bruce's arm.

"Don't be foolish, Oliver brings a lot to the table. With all those hair products, he's practically our Avon lady."

Leaning against the wall for support, Hal held his sides as he laughed. "I'm so using that later."

Bruce rolled his eyes, watching the green Alfreds clean away. "I thought you needed to master willpower to use the ring?"

"Are you kidding me? With the amount of willpower it must take to put up with your rich boy ass, I'm surprised that the Smurfs haven't inducted Alfred into the Green Lantern Corps already, he'd probably outrank _me_," teased Hal.

With a glare, Bruce deadpanned, "Like _that's_ saying something."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I was in a heated debate about _the Dark Knight Rises_ with a friend, I was _not_ a fan of the film myself, and I found myself thinking about Alfred. And one of my favorite dynamics from the comics is that of Alfred and the various super-heroes that tag along with Bruce at the Bat Cave.

Think of it very similarly to how I write Lois meeting the various heroes of the world, yet more uptight with a british accent and arguably the greatest grasp on sarcasm known to man-kind, haha. It's magical. And who better to have him duel with than our very own Hal Jordan, arguably the second greatest sarcasm-wizard on our planet, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought!

**Statement about _Wonder Woman and Superman as a couple_:** Alright, I've been getting a lot of mentions and comments and private messages about this, so I kind of feel like I need to make a statement about it. For whatever reason why, haha. And I'm going to warn you, a lot of you aren't going to like what I'm about to say, haha.

I have absolutely no problem with it.

Shocking, I know. I'm sure many of you thought I'd be red hot with rage. But here's why I have no problem with it: It isn't going to last. Now, I know a lot of you don't read comics, and that's fine, I'll lay down the bullet points for you. In a tie-in with that particular issue of _Justice League_, Booster Gold appeared from the future to stop them but was too late. Secondly, Lois is plenty present in both _Action Comics_ and in _Superman_ (the title). Clark is clearly in love with her in _Superman_ (the title) and you can tell that she feels something for him. Thirdly, there is virtually zero chance that Brian Azzarello, the writer of Wonder Woman, is going to have Wonder Woman take a boyfriend in his run.

So that's the plot reason why it's not going to last. It just seems like a big deal because comics take so long to tell a story. We are twelve issues into the New 52, and we just finished the first arc of the Batman story. And we rebooted for a reason, and you don't go back to the way things were a year in. I'm all for the younger Superman despite erasing the marriage of Lois and Clark because we get to see it happen all over again, and I promise you, it will.

Geoff Johns is easily my favorite writer, in all of comics. He loves Lois Lane. You can just tell in his writing that he does. This is just a bit of story, that will ultimately play out and probably have a positive impact on Clark down the road when he finally ends up with Lois. In comics, you're only getting an issue every month. That's why story lines seem so big, because it takes four or five to cover even a short arc. You don't need to fret, Lois and Clark will end up together. It's been hinted all across the DC Universe, it's destiny. This is just a bit of story that will make Superman and Wonder Woman better characters down the road. I know it. I have faith in Geoff Johns, and I really hope no one jumps off a bridge, haha.

Anyways, feel free to flame on if you're still angry, and now angry with me, haha.

**Next Up:** Probably _World War 3._


	214. World War 3

**Review Comments:**

_**SM/WW Controversy **_- Alright, alright, this is kind of what I was hoping to avoid, folks! haha. I don't want anybody calling anybody out or arguing with each other in the reviews. The fact is that nobody knows what is going to happen, so there's no point in getting heated about it. Some of us believe that Lois and Clark will end up together, myself included, and that's fine. Others think it's time for a new pairing after 80 years of Clois, and that's fine too. Everybody is welcome to their own opinion.

The fact of the matter is that if you thought we were going to have Clois right out of the gate, you probably should have thought again. It took almost 60 years for Lois and Clark to get married in 1996, so I wouldn't hold your breath on them dating anytime soon, let alone getting married. Like I said before, we rebooted for a reason. To explore new stories, to explore new ideas. Part of that meant de-aging the characters, and that meant erasing marriages. Clois didn't take the only hit, Barry Allen and Iris West aren't married anymore either, and Shayera Hall has been noticeably absent from Carter Hall's life in the pages of the Savage Hawkman.

This was the cost of a reboot. Only time will tell what unfolds, so let's just take it easy on each other and avoid attacking each other over something that nobody knows anything about. Superman and Wonder Woman might be together for five issues, they might be together for five years, maybe longer. We're just going to have to take it a month at a time. Personally, I'm quite interested to see how the whole thing unfolds and I think it'll be great for Clark's character development. Might help shape him into the person that accepts himself and asserts himself at the Daily Planet, something he hasn't done yet, which might make him catch the eye of a certain Ms. Lane.

Nobody knows jack yet. So let's not attack each other like we do. If not for civility, do it for me, guys.

**_Jas-El_ **- We kind of already talked via PM, so I'm gunna skip ahead, lots of reviews to respond to, haha.

_**Spoons There Are** _- Fair enough. As I said above, everybody's going to have their opinions and I'm not the kind of person to run around telling someone they're wrong when I honestly don't have tangible evidence to back me up. But for the sake of an adult conversation, I'd like to make some counterpoints? If that's fair? In the _Justice League International_ Annual, it's pretty clear that Booster thinks that there will be no good of Wonder Woman and Superman getting together. In no way does it indicate an end to the relationship, just that their relationship will be a more complicated story than the two of them grabbing chinese. In my opinion.

As for the Superman comics, I feel like there have been serval indications that Clark has feelings for Lois. And when I said she had feelings for him, I was referring to Clark, not Superman. And yes, I know how stupid that just sounded. Also, there is a panel from Justice League itself where, I wanna say Steve Lombard, asks Lois why she's waiting around for Superman, and she retorts that Superman is waiting around for her. I'm just saying, that's kind of an obvious dish. I'm pretty sure the New 52 titles are caught up, in the Green Arrow issue we see them fighting against some of the Talons from the Court of the Owls, but comics are comics and known to be funky timeline-wise.

And lastly, I can't believe I'm writing three paragraphs on something I didn't even want to debate, haha, the whole cross-over thing. I'm sure that there will be. What I meant was more like, Superman isn't going to become a main cast member of Wonder Woman. And vice-versa. I'm sure there will be cameos and at the very least references. So, yeah, call me crazy, seriously, you can, you should hear what my mother calls me, but I think Lois and Clark are a sure thing. Like I said above, I'm not expecting them to start dating anytime soon, let alone end up married. But I will put my money down on, eventually, them becoming an item.

But that's just me, and to each their own. I don't pretend to know the future of the DC Universe.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad!

_**alexindigo**_ - You have my word! There will be a Red-K chapter! haha. But if I'm gunna do it, I'm gunna do it right! haha. I have been watching Saving Hope. I do need my Erica Durance fix, after all. Still killing me that she won't be playing Lois, though I never really had high hopes for a Smallville movie. Just little, undying hopes for the future, haha.

I don't know if stunt is the word that I'd use. It's definitely not going to hurt the sales. But if you read the Justice League comic, it does make sense for those two to take a spin around Dating Dr. Especially with how everything is set up in the scene leading to the kiss. It was actually really well done, though now I've cost myself all my readers, haha. I think Lois has a fair sized role, it's just that there has been a lot more emphasis on him than on his life on the Daily Planet. All in good time, I'm sure though. I have all the faith in the world in Geoff Johns, so I'm not worried at all. Like I said, there's a lot to them pairing up. It's very well set up and will be a good story, I'm confident.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Alfred is one of the best non-super-powered characters to ever be introduced into comics. The dude is golden, and it's unfathomable to imagine Batman without him. He is a special character, and as iconic as it gets.

No jumping off bridges! haha. I know, it's not going to be popular with most Cloisers. But I think it's going to be good for his story. They've both got their reasons for entering into this relationship, and I'm very interested to see how it plays out. Lois Lane isn't going anywhere, I have all the confidence in the world that they'll find their way back together. It's the most iconic pairing of all time. I'm not worried, and neither should you. The whole point of the reboot was to check out new stories and new ideas, this is one of many we'll see.

_**Lilbit4**_ - The comics are selling pretty well, like Spoons pointed out in the second review, they're getting a reprint and you don't see that very often for a #12 issue. This is going to be around a while, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. Like I've been saying, I think this is going to be a very interesting plot-line, and the whole point of this reboot was to explore new stories and new ideas. In the end, I'm sure that Lois and Clark will end up together, but it's extremely unlikely to be anytime soon, and nor should it. We went sixty years before they got married, they shouldn't be getting hitched a year, or two, or even three years in. That's just my opinion on it.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #214, World War 3

**Author's Note: **This is Part 4 of my **_Return of Zod_** storyline

* * *

"Dad! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

The General grimaced, "Lois, how did you get in here? This is a secure bunker."

Lois growled, "My feminine charm and a mean right hook, now what the hell is going on?"

He motioned to the monitors in front of him. "What does it look like? There's a war going on out there, Lo. A war that my men can't even begin to fight in. Those, what do you call them? Zoners? Each one of them as powerful as Superman."

"No one, is as strong as Superman."

"I wish that was true, Lo. I really do," he sighed. "But can't you see?" He motioned at the monitor again. "That's simply not true."

Lois watched on the monitor as Superman fought against countless Zoners. His suit in shreds, blood pouring from various wounds as he tried to hold them back. '_Dammit, Hal_,' she grimaced. '_Where are the Corps? He needs reinforcements..._'

"I don't have any other choice."

She turned back to him, "What? What are you talking about? What choice? What is going on?"

Sam gave her a stern look. It said a lot of things at once. It said that he didn't have a choice, but it also said that he was sorry. She saw the diagram on the table and knew exactly what he was sorry about. Rage filled her eyes.

"You're going to nuke them? That's not going to do anything but hurt innocent people. That's not going to stop them!"

He closed his eyes. "I know."

Lois shook her head, "You kn-... What did you do, Dad?"

"We know that there is only one thing that can hurt Superman."

Realization set in as her eyes grew wide. "You can't do that."

"I have to. It's the only way."

"_Kryptonite_? Those missiles will kill him!"

"It will kill _them_. And the ones that it doesn't, we'll be able to take care of after the dust settles."

Lois could feel the tears stinging in her eyes as her father spoke with such finality. "You will _kill_ him... Kill _Superman_..."

"I'm sorry, Lo, but this has to be done."

"Give the League more time! Green Lantern will bring more reinforcements! They can stop this!"

The General shook his head, "There isn't any time left. Even if we don't do this, they _will_ kill him. And when they do, who knows how many more they will kill before help comes. The decision has been made, Lo."

"What? What does that-"

Her eyes bugged out as she saw a small boy streak on the screen, her heart completely dropped as tears started to fly. '_Chris.._'

"Dad! You can't do this! You don't understand! That's my-"

She was cut off as she felt the rumble beneath her feet.

The launch shook the entire facility as the rockets shot up from the silos and out of the facility. Lois ripped around to watch the monitors with terror etched across her features. She had lost Clark on the monitors, all she could see were Zoners where he had been and she searched with a gut-wrenching panic, "No, no, no, no..." she sobbed under hear breath.

Even worse, she couldn't find Christopher in the fray either. "Please don't be there, please don't be there, please don't be there..."

The General kept his eye on the radar, following the dozen missiles' path as they approached their targets. He knew that it would be just moments until they reached. He slowly gripped his daughter's shoulder, knowing that she was never going to forgive him for this.

Her screams were masked by the roar of the explosion as green flashed across the monitors.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, that's a little bit of a cliff-hanger, dontcha think? haha. Anyways, we'll get to see what happens next here in a little bit, I'm going to throw in another chapter in between the two parts to keep you on the edge of your seat, haha. Make sure to let me know what you thought with some lovely little reviews! They're what keep me writing!

**Next Up:** _Metallo_.


	215. Metallo

**Review Comments:**

_**Katlynne**_ - I told you I was gunna post it before I crashed! Not naughty!

_**White-Falcon-06**_ - I know! I know! I felt bad, but it's nice to make you guys hungry for more! It's not even gone in the regular comics, they're just not the Clois we've had for the last twenty years. Which isn't such a bad thing since we'll get to see them fall in love all over again. I'm definitely up for that.

_**Lilbit4**_ - I know that you have very strong feelings, haha, I'm just trying to avoid a war of words, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - When it comes to kryptonite missiles, you're playing for keeps, so it's not hard to imagine that Lois has her back against the wall here. I hope you'll enjoy Metallo even though it's not the next installment! haha.

_**vsanta**_ - I guess you'll just have to stay tuned for more! haha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you're enjoying it! I try to intertwine the story with the comics when I can, sometimes it works and other times there just wasn't enough wiggle room left by the show. You'll have to keep reading to find out how things turn out for Clark and Chris, there is still plenty of story left to tell.

I honestly don't have any problem with _Spoons There Are_ disagreeing with me, we're all free to have our own opinions. I was the one that brought up the controversy, that opened up the topic in the reviews. We'll all just have to wait and see how it all plays out, some of us will feel one way, others will feel the other.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - The way I see it, plenty of amazing stories have come from changes made to the "status quo." There was a little show that went off the beaten path and made Clark Kent and Lex Luthor best friends in their youth, you might have heard of it, haha. It was pretty controversial, but it all worked out. I wasn't keen on Lois knowing Clark before he became Superman and/or moved to the Daily Planet, but now that I've seen it all play out, I loved it! haha.

I'm just excited for a new story, one that will certainly have a big impact on Clark, because he definitely isn't the Clark we know yet. I'm excited to see how it impacts his development. As for the last chapter, that's what I was going for! haha. I'm glad that you liked it! Hopefully you'll like what happens next!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I hadn't thought about that, but that's a good point, haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**cathy03**_ - I completely understand, haha. Real Life is insanity sometimes. I'm glad you liked the cliff-hanger, haha. Yeah, the eight years thing still baffles me, but what can ya do? haha. Maybe we'll find out in Season 11. You're right, there's been plenty of "what the hell were you thinking?" moments with the Smallville writers/producers.

I do love me some Alfred, I love writing him in my Batman scripts. Some of the lines I come up with him, I can't imagine giving anyone else lines like these, haha. I'm sure this won't be the last time we see him.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, John/Lois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #215, Metallo

**Author's Note:** Alright folks, this one is pretty straight forward, hope you enjoy!

* * *

"Is it done?"

Jefferson turned to see his boss standing behind him, his eyes fixed on the monitor. "Yes, Mr. Luthor. Project Metallo has been an uphill climb, but I've managed to remap his aggressive tendencies to match our projections. Corben should be the weapon that we've been trying to create since your return. Finally we'll have an answer to the _freaks_ out there."

"And his memories?"

"I've been able to erase the vast majority of his memory banks, including all of Corben's memories regarding Clark Kent, Superman, or the Blur per your request, Mr. Luthor. Project Ares was flawed by Keenan's emotions, without his memories, Corben should be the perfect soldier to combat against the super-powered community."

"Excellent."

"The memory of him using a key from the Kent Barn to transport him to Superman's Fortress of Solitude, it was spectacular. I just can't believe that bumbling reporter for the Daily Planet is _Superman_."

Lex nodded slowly, "Yes, it's _quite_ the performance."

One of Corben's memories flittered over the monitor. "What is this?"

"One of the final memories to erase. It would appear that the Man of Steel and our literal _man_ of _steel_ had more in common than we might have thought. Corben was madly infatuated with Lois Lane. It's taken me days to isolate these, they were deeply imbedded in the memory banks. He must have cared for her greatly."

Lex considered this new piece of information. Jefferson shrugged, "I've got them now, I'll just delete them."

"No."

Jefferson's brow furrowed in confusion. "But sir-"

"Leave them intact. Have you told anyone about Kent? Left any notes? Any trace of Superman's identity?"

Shaking his head, Jefferson was even more confused as he stared at the monitor. "Of course not, this is a Level 7 project. I'm the only person with access to this information, but I don't understand, aren't we going to tell the world-"

Blood splattered the screen, and Jefferson fell to the ground. Lex wiped the barrel of his gun down before clearing some of the blood from the monitor. Narrowing his eyes, Lex slid the mouse to the '_Run Program_' option.

Sputtering, Jefferson whimpered from the ground. "Wha...why did...why are you..."

Lex knelt down in front of him, cocking his head slightly with a terrifying calmness to him. "It's all part of the game. You are just a pawn in something so much grander. Unfortunately for you, the pawns are the first to go."

Behind them, Corben's eyes flittered open as he began to reboot himself.

"Lane...what does...what does she have...to do...with..."

Lex almost pitied the man bleeding out before him. "She have everything to do with this..."

Jefferson would never get his answer as he drifted away. Lex stood up and watched as the kryptonite heart began to glow green and beat faster and faster. Jefferson had asked what Lois had to do with any of this.

"There's nothing like the woman you love falling for another man, to make you want to _kill_ him."

* * *

**Author's Note:** The birth of _Metallo_! haha. Well, what did you guys think? haha. I came up with this idea so that Metallo would be fueled by Lois' apparent connection with Superman for his evil side, but even though some people clearly think otherwise, Corben was not all _cyborged_ out when he was in the Fortress. So with that in mind, he should have been able to put two-and-two together after retrieving the key from the Kent Barn and figured out Clark was the Blur.

So I had to nip that in the butt, haha. Don't need every bad guy in the world knowing who Clark really is. Anyways, we'll see some Metallo vs. Superman fireworks in the near future, so I figured I should set it up! Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I don't have a title for it yet, but it's the sequel to _World War 3_, haha.


	216. Ursa & Non

**Review Comments:**

_**Lilbit4**_ - Haha, evil?! Not me! haha. Well, here is some more!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I couldn't let Brainiac be the reason _all_ of Clark's villains return, haha. Metallo seemed like by far the easiest for Lex to bring back. Metallo is such a great character in the comics, it's a shame he doesn't get more love. I'm hoping to write some really nice chapters with him in the future. I have a big one in mind already.

And yes, Lex's calm is such a wonderfully creepy thing, haha. I love me a villain who can do something horrible, and act like it was no big deal. And Lex Luthor is so that guy, haha. Him and the Joker. I love those two, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Zod/Ursa, Bruce/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #216, Ursa & Non

**Author's Note: **Part 5 of my **_Return of Zod_** storyline. Enjoy!

* * *

Clark eyed the swarm from afar, he hoped that Lois had listened. He hoped that she'd get Chris and Jo'an as far from the city as they could. He didn't need a head count, he knew he was hopelessly out-numbered.

They were gathering at the center point of the city, Centennial Park.

He zoomed over military vehicles and soldiers clawing their way through stopped traffic, knowing that these men and women would meet their untimely end if they went toe-to-toe with the Zoners. Three Zoners stood atop a slight hill in the park. He had a pretty good idea who was leading the charge and who he'd find atop the hill.

"Zod..." he growled.

His voice echoed. The Zoners turned. All but one. All but one who was relishing the moment. "Kal-El..."

Arrogance was palpable as the General finally revealed himself to his opponent. Clark felt shivers down his spine as he recognized the man before him the man he pulled out of Lex Luthor all those years ago.

"How nice of you to join us, Brother..."

Clark gritted his teeth, "You are _not_ my brother."

Zod tilted his head, "I suppose not. I would think we're more than that, aren't we, Kal-El? Even the other voice inside, the other _me_... has to admit you are more an adversary to me than even your _father_ ever was to _him_. We once talked about a connection, Kal-El, a connection with someone that felt like you were opposite sides of the same sword... I thought that meant us brothers, but now... I think it means something else... I think it means destined for _this_."

"And what is _this_?"

Rage masked in calmness stared back at him. "The war."

Clark balled up his fists. "I won't let you wage war on this planet, Zod."

"Well it's not just about me, is it?" bragged Zod. Non cracked his knuckles, Ursa took a fighting stance. "I have my devoted followers, eager for their revenge on the House of El for imprisoning them."

A roar sounded above them, the Zoners and Clark looked to the sky.

"Then I guess it's a good thing he isn't alone!"

Clark knew that voice. He turned back to Zod with a smirk of his own as Batman fell to his right, Wonder Woman to his left. It didn't take a second longer to wipe that look off the General's face. "Hal is bringing back-up."

"Good. Now, Diana, the left. Bruce, the right."

Batman shook his head, a smirk playing across his face as he deadpanned. "I'm human, but I always get the _big_ ones."

"Would you rather fight the woman?" growled Diana.

Clark raised his hand, "Enough with the foreplay, we've got work to do, you two."

The battle begun. The Zoners formed a perimeter around the six of them. Batman took on Non, Wonder Woman squared off with Ursa, and of course, Clark and Zod were locked into a grudge match for the ages. Somehow, the Trinity were winning. A set of kryptonite-leaded knuckle beads helped Bruce turn the tide against Non.

Diana was more than enough of a match against Ursa, but the Lasso helped. Clark and Zod were almost evenly matched, but both Batman and Wonder Woman knew that Clark would die before surrendering.

A ding echoed from Batman's communicator, "Superman! We've got incoming!"

"The Zoners are hard to miss," mutter Clark in between blows with Zod.

"No, not the Zoners..." Batman delivered a knock-out blow to Non and put two fingers to his cowl. "Cyborg says that two silos outside of the city are preparing for launch. ETA two minutes, but they have to know that they won't do anything..."

Clark slammed his elbow into Zod's jaw, and then a shot to the gut to shoot him through the trees. He knew what was coming. "Fall back." Bruce joined him at his side, his kryptonite knuckles covering with lead.

"We're not leaving you!" screamed Diana, wrenching Ursa into an arm-bar. She flipped her onto her back and kicked her in the face, knocking her out cold. "I didn't join the fray to give up so easily, Clark."

"There will be kryptonite in those missiles. I know _who_ is sending them, and I know that _he_ knows the score."

Diana shook her head, "They will kill you! Come with us"

"I'll get out before the blast, I have to keep the Zoners here" assured Clark. "But the blast _will_ kill you both."

"He's right."

She grabbed Clark's arm, "You better get out before the blast."

Clark nodded. Holding close to Batman, they shot up into the air back towards the Invisible Jet they rode in on. As they jetted away, Clark prepared to turn back to the Zoners when he took a blow to the face.

Slumped against a boulder, his attacker approached. "It's going to take more than that to stop me, _Brother_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I know that this kind of takes place at the same time as _World War 3_, but I couldn't exactly post this first and spoil the big ending for that chapter! haha. We'll see some serious conclusion in the next one as Chris enters the fray, and to avoid my death, that will be the next chapter posted, haha.

Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought! Send me some reviews!

**Next Up:** _Lor-Zod_, the finale for the _**Return of Zod**_.


	217. LorZod

**Review Comments:**

_**Whynot1993**_ - Well, here is the Finale! Though I have to admit, it's hardly a done deal, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I love Zod because he's completely on par with Clark physically. Probably stronger. Though with Clark's will, and his drive, and his never ending heart ultimately give him the edge he needs. I hope you like the Finale!

_**Lilbit4**_ - I'm glad that you like them! Hope there's many more stories to tell!

_**Tomarisun**_ - Some of my favorite things to write are when Clark gets some back-up, so I'm glad you liked it! I just didn't want to have Clark face all this alone, which is one of the big complaints I hear about the Death of Superman, so I needed to at least have some of the League cameo in this one. That's our Superman, haha. I'm glad you're enjoying the story!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - No problem! I'm glad that you liked the last two chapters, and no, I don't think Lois is going to be very happy when the dust settles. But that's a story for another chapter! Hope you like the Finale!

_**McCabeRz**_ - Well, it's an amazing episode! haha. Now I kind of want to go back and watch it, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Zod/Ursa

******Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #217, Lor-Zod

**Author's Note: **Part 6, and the finale, of my **_Return of Zod_** storyline. Enjoy!

* * *

_**and now. . . .the Return of Zod Finale. . . .**_

"Get away from him!"

Zod looked up to see the boy rocketing towards him, but he smacked him away with the flick of his wrist. Clark's eyes widened as he watched his adopted son slam into the ground a few feet away.

"I swear, Zod... You _are_ going back to the Phantom Zone..." growled Clark as he rose from the ground.

"As long as the boy remains outside of the Zone, the tether is broken," gloated Zod.

Chris moaned in pain as he pushed some of the rubble off of himself. He could hear his father making a speech to Papa Clark.

"You won't send him back, so we're not going back," smirked Zod. "Face it, Kal-El. You have lost. We will wipe this planet clean, do what you _should_ have, and rebuild Krypton. Your people, they will be our _slaves_."

Clark began to circle around his enemy, trying to get between him and Chris. "Why here?"

"What?"

"Why not one of the countless planets in the universe? Why do you keep coming back _here_?"

Zod almost laughed. "Why? Why _here_? Because this was Jor-El's playground. This is _your_ home. There is nowhere I'd rather conquer than this place. I will destroy your precious home, and then build my empire on your grave. A perfect insult to Jor-El's memory. The perfect revenge on the man that sent me to my death with the rest of the Kandorians."

A snarl formed on Clark's face as he charged, "Not on my watch."

His anger betrayed him. His focus clouded. Zod deflected his blows and sent one of his own to Clark's ribs. The bones cracked under the force. "This isn't like old times, Kal-El. I have strength too now. And two life-times of knowledge."

The mean right-hook to Clark's jaw sent him to the ground, the kick to his stomach did more than just crack his sternum.

"Like the rest of this planet, you will _kneel_ or you will _die_," growled Zod. "I will kill the boy long before I go back to that _place_."

As he lay on his back, Chris could see up in the sky what looked like a shooting star. He looked closer, and he could see that it was a piece of glass. Square and cracked open. He thought about what his father had said. That if he went back, the Phantom Zone would pull the Zoners back and save Papa Clark and Earth. He knew what he had to do.

Standing, Chris looked up into the sky to try and pinpoint where the glass was again. Catching both of the men's attention.

Clark grunted as he looked up, "Chris, what are you..."

"Don't worry, I've got this, Papa Clark."

Both Zod and Clark looked confused, but realized immediately what the boy was doing as he shot into the sky.

"You _dare_ defy me, Boy?" shouted Zod. "I should have ripped your heart out when I had the chance!"

His threats were lost on Chris as he continued to push higher and higher. Zod took off after him.

"Chris! No!"

He kept flying, shouting back, "I have to! They are going to hurt people! I have to save them! I have to save Mama Lois!"

Clark was barely able to stand, chasing after Zod and the boy. He had to stop Chris, but he had to stop Zod too. Even worse, he could feel the ground shake as the missiles approached. He had to get to Chris and get him to safety.

"Get back here, boy! I will snap your neck for this betrayal! I am your _father_! You have disgraced the House of Zod!"

Chris turned back, "You are _not_ my _father_."

Red beams shot from his eyes as he scorched Zod, causing the General to fall back. Clark had caught up with them, smacking Zod back down to the surface. He reached up for Chris. "Stop! You can't do this! There has to be another way!"

"There is no other way, Papa Clark... I've got to save the day..."

Clark reached for his ankle, trying to stop him, but he just wasn't fast enough. Chris braced himself. "Up, up, and away!"

There was a flash of light that blinded Clark.

When he was able to see, he could see a green cloud on the ground below. The missiles had hit. He was just outside of it's reach, and when the smoke cleared, he saw the Zoners were gone. His face fell into hands, tears streaming out.

"Chris..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? The story isn't over, don't worry, haha. We'll get an epilogue, haha. Anyways, I hope that you guys like it! I know it's not much of a Finale, and honestly, there's going to be plenty of questions still lingering even with the Epilogue in the next few days. Maybe even a few new questions as well, haha. Oh boy, I think you guys might really kill me this time, haha.

Shoot me a review and tell me what you thought! You know the drill, your reviews make me write faster! And I'm sure after how I ended this one, you guys are going to be more anxious than ever for the next piece of the puzzle! haha.

**Next Up:** _the Metropolis Ritz_, which I _can't wait_ to hear what you think about, haha.


	218. Metropolis Ritz

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I honestly didn't think there was any other way to have it go. That moment is like, _the_ Chris moment to me. There wasn't any other way I could imagine ending this chapter of Chris' life, and I think you might just get to see that future chapter, haha.

_**Luna Lopi**_ - I'm glad that you like them! It's always great to hear and I hope you enjoy the future chapters as well!

_**whynot1993**_ - Of course not! haha. Chris Kent isn't dead, and I'm sure this isn't the last we'll see of him either.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I think it's safe to say that Chris intends to come back, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Only time will tell what Chris' fate will be! haha. There will be an epilogue in the next chapter that will answer _some_ of your questions, but it will raise some as well, haha. I can say that there will be lots of story left to tell, as I've come up with quite a few "arc" ideas for the future. Mostly combining Smallville and the comics, so keep an eye out, haha.

I'm glad that you liked it though! Oh dear, you're going to make me blush! haha. One can only dream, right?! I'd love to get a chance to write at DC, especially with the reboot offering some very wonderful possibilities! I'd love to get a chance to write Superman, but I'd kill to write so many different characters like Hawkman or Batman or Green Arrow! In fact, I can't think of who I wouldn't want to write! But until then, I'll just keep writing here, and hopefully you guys will stick with me for the long haul!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, and uh, an...other..._horrifying_...pairing? haha.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #218, the Metropolis Ritz

**Author's Note: **I think you'll like this one, hahaha. It's the part one of an arc called, '**_The Unexpected Team-Up_**'! Enjoy!

* * *

"You remember all the times you gave me hell about _the stars and stripes_?" she all but smirked.

He gave her a '_don't-start_' look.

"We are so even now, Smallville."

_**24 hours ago. . . .**_

"I don't think you understand how big of a story this is, Kent!"

Clark shook his head, "No way, sir. With all due respect, I'm not ok with this!"

Eyebrows raised and eyes big, Lois simply stood in the back of Perry White's cramped office. It wasn't very often that you saw Clark Kent spraying spit, going toe-to-toe with the Boss, so you kind of had to enjoy it while it lasted.

"A reporter must be willing to do whatever it takes to get the story, Clark. Great Cesar's Ghost, I can't believe I have to tell you that, you're married to _Lois Lane_, for Elvis' sake!" shouted Perry as he bent over his desk, hands gripping the hard wood.

"That is exactly my point, Mr. White! I am not comfortable with my _wife_ posing as a _prostitute_ to get a story!"

Perry stood up straight, "Then we won't have a problem."

"I won't-, wait, what?"

He reached down and grabbed his cigar, "I have no intention of having _Lane_ pose as a prostitute." He grabbed his lighter and raised it up to his face, the clicking drowned out Clark's surprised, "Well then. Good."

"I don't need _her_ to pose, because _you're_ the one going undercover this time, Kent."

Clark's eyes grew big, and Lois was torn between laughing her head off and ripping Perry's head off for suggesting that her Smallville was going to have to seduce some woman. "You want...You want me...Oh _golly_..."

**_the present. . . ._**

"That's not funny."

Lois nodded, "It's a little funny."

Clark eyed the seedy motel from the car a block away. "Shouldn't you be jealous right now? There's a woman in there that is going to try and sleep with me. Normally you'd be murdering Perry for putting me on an assignment like this."

"I was, but then I remembered it's _you_."

"What is that supposed to-"

She raised a hand, "I'm not saying you don't have sex appeal, Smallville. You do. I'm kind of thinking about clearing the backseat out as we speak. That's not the point. You aren't going to cheat, I'm sure you're already telling yourself '_get the story and sneak out_' by now, so I'm just going to go ahead and enjoy the fact that little Clarkie is the one who gets to play dress up this time."

He literally growled, "Uhuh..."

"Besides, whatever bimbo is forking out the doe for Smallville's finest hunk of beef isn't here, they're down at Ritz or something. This is probably where you meet up with your pimp, _oh god that's never going to be not funny now_, and then they send you out."

Clark growled again, "It's not funny."

"It's a little funny. Now come hop in the backseat, quick like a bunny" she muttered as she crawled over him into the backseat.

"Lois, we have an hour until the meet."

She poked her head between the seats, "Exactly, what's your point? We only have an hour, and momma brought her _mask_."

Noting the horribly done accent she used on _mask_, he blurred his way into the backseat before she could say another word.

He made his way down the hall of the Metropolis Ritz, pushing his glasses up the ridge of his nose. He shuddered as he recalled what the outfitter girl had told him when he refused to take them off, "_That attached, eh? Keep 'em. We gots more than a couple customers into the classroom thing, anyway._"

Clark shook his head and continued the mantra he started in the car on the way to the hotel.

'_Get the story, sneak out. Get the story, sneak out. Get the story, oh god I'm going to pass out..._' he wiped the sweat from his brow, a feat that he normally only had to do when he was blue-K. He was _that_ nervous right now.

He found room number 7734, and after taking multiple long breaths, Clark knocked.

"Come in!" sounded a voice through the door.

Clark frowned, feeling like it sounded familiar, but figured he was imagining things between his nervousness and the distortion that the door must have caused. He turned the handle slowly and stepped inside, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Our mutual friend tells me that you will introduce me to pleasures I've never imagin- ..._Clark Kent_?"

His eyes shot open as his face twisted into all manner of confusion and panic. Clark managed to mutter just two words.

"_Lex Luthor_?!"

_**to be continued in. . . . Room 7734. . . .**_

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, who saw that coming? hahaha. Honestly, I got this idea a while back and I just couldn't figure out finish off the story in a way that would make it all make sense, but I feel like I've got it now and I can't wait to see what you all think! Make sure to shoot me some reviews, you know how the more you review the more I wanna post!

**Next Up:** _Fort Rozz_, the epilogue of _**the Return of Zod**_.


	219. Fort Rozz

**Review Comments:**

**_Jas-El_** - I can see how you would feel that way, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! haha.

_**Lilbit4**_ - You're too sweet, I'm glad that you liked it! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I was hoping that it would be a surprise! haha. Oh, I think that Lois is going to have a field day with this one, haha. I have a whole swarm of ideas for her reaction, I haven't gotten to that part quite yet, so I'm excited to write it, haha. Well, it definitely does put the Diana thing in perspective, doesn't it? hahaha. It could be _soooo_ much worse, haha.

Well then, I hope you'll enjoy it, but I'm afraid there might only be more questions! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - You'll get it right after this one! haha.

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I hope I make it make sense too, haha. I just remember having this idea about Clark having to pose as a hooker to get the story, and then I thought, "wouldn't it be funny if he knew the person?" and then pop! Lex Luthor came to mind, haha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - Better late than never, right? haha. I'm glad that you liked them! I too think that Lois will have fun with this one, haha. Oh it would be so fun to see Tom Welling and Michael Rosenbaum do that scene, haha. Rosie is a riot, haha.

_**Ace of Gallifrey**_ - I've always liked that line, haha. I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #219, Fort Rozz

**Author's Note: **Well, this serves as an Epilogue to the _**Return of Zod**_ storyline. Hope you guys like it!

* * *

"He can help us?"

Clark didn't want to nod. He didn't want to give her false hope. "He's my only contact within the Phantom Zone. If Chris is there, he will know about it. He's been keeping tabs on Zod for me since he got there."

Moving the crystals around in the console, a beam of light shot down before them. As a man appeared, Lois vaguely recalled when she journeyed to the Fortress and they stumbled across the recording of Clark's parents. "Mon-El," Clark greeted.

"Kal-El, it is good to see you. And Lois, I see."

She nodded, "Clark tells me that you can help us find our son."

Both Clark and Mon-El looked away for a moment. "I'm going to do everything I can, Lois. I promise."

"Going to... Does that mean you haven't found him? What do you know? Did he go back with the rest of the Zoners?"

Mon-El shook his head, "As far as I can tell, he is not here."

"What about Zod? Could he have taken Chris?" asked Lois, barely keeping herself together.

Mon-El shook his head. "I've kept my eye on Zod since his return, and there hasn't been any chatter about Chris. After everything that has happened, if he had him, we'd know about it. Zod hasn't left Fort Rozz since he returned."

Clark frowned, "Fort Rozz?"

"It was a prison on Krypton. There was a jail break, and instead of risking lives if they escaped or trying to fight them, the Council forced your father to send the entire prison to the Phantom Zone. At least that's what I've heard," explained Mon-El. "Zod uses it as his base of operations. It's far on the other side of the Zone, far from the portals, I'm not surprised you've never come across it."

Her lip quivered, "So there's nothing? We just give up?"

Clark put his hand on her shoulder, "We _never_ give up, Lois."

"Nor will I," agreed Mon-El. "After all that Kal-El has done for me, I will never stop looking for him. If he is here, I will find him."

Lois and Clark nodded, "Thank you."

The projector turned off, and Clark sighed. When he turned, he saw her eyes. Big, scared, and filled with tears. He knew that she had waited until Mon-El was gone to break down. He knew she'd been waiting since he told her that Chris was gone to break down. Now that it was just the two of them, she didn't need to wear her armor for a moment longer.

It was time for her to break down to the only person she'd ever let see her this way.

"What if we never see him again, Smallville?" she cried. "What if he's lost in that place, lost and alone? What if he is scared, Clark? We can't just give up on him, we have to find him... We have to find our son, Clark..."

He grabbed her and pulled her close, but he had no words to say. He'd been thinking all those same thoughts since the moment that light flashed and Chris had disappeared mere inches away. He just held her. He let her cry. Because he had no answers.

Lois sobbed into Clark's chest, "Where is our son, Clark? What is he?"

"I promise, Lois..." he had to bite back tears of his own, "...I will find him... I _promise_..."

_**. . . .elsewhere. . . .**_

"Not again...Not...Not _again_!" he growled. His knife plunged into the sand where he knelt. "I will _destroy_ him...I will _kill_ him..." Each time he drew the symbol, _his_ symbol, he ripped an _X_ across it. "I will not fail _again_... I will not-"

There was a shuffle in the sand nearby, he noticed it immediately. The voice barely squeaked as he shot from his knees.

"General-"

The knife tore right through the soldier's uniform, his words were but an empty breath on his lips as his mouth filled with blood. Twisting his knife into the man's heart, Zod shook with rage as he snarled, "I was to be left alone. That was an _order_!" He turned to the man who stood next to his victim. "Illuminate me as to why you have disobeyed my orders if you wish not to share his fate..." he growled.

Words escaped the second soldier as Zod removed the knife from the heart of the man who laid dead at his feet. "Speak!"

"The mission, sir. We were successful."

His eyes clenched tightly as he began to shake with rage again, "Kal-El lives. Earth spins on. What-"

"Not that mission, sir... The _other_ mission..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Did I just leave you with more questions than you already had? I think I might have... Oops... hahaha. Anyways, I hope that you guys liked it still! haha. I promise, this isn't the last that we'll hear for ole Zod and a certain boy who has won over the heart of one Lois Lane. You'll just have to wait and see how it all turns out at an undisclosed date!

Muahaha. I always wanted to do that, haha. Shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Room 7734_, aka the second part of **_the Unexpected Team-Up_** arc.


	220. Room 7734

**Review Comments**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I gotta keep you guys coming back for more! haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - Who me?! Noooooooo! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I have to give you guys a reason to keep coming back! haha. I'm sure it won't be that long! I'm too excited about the idea that I have coming up to make you wait that long, haha. I love getting to write Zod because I get to throw on my Lord of the Rings cap and start talking gibberish, hahaha. I love writing his dialogue, it's sooooo much fun! haha.

Yeah, I think Clark is the only person that gets to see all of Lois. All the way into her soul, so I wanted to give them their own special moment to have a breakdown about Chris disappearing. I'm glad it worked as intended, haha.

_**C.A.M.S. 22**_ - Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

_**NeverSayNever95**_ - I try to keep giving you guys a reason to come back! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #220, Room 7734

**Author's Note: **And the sequel to the Metropolis Ritz chapter, and part two of '**_The Unexpected Team-Up_**' arc! Enjoy!

* * *

_**previously. . . .**_

He found room number 7734, and after taking multiple long breaths, Clark knocked.

"Come in!" sounded a voice through the door.

Clark frowned, feeling like it sounded familiar, but figured he was imagining things between his nervousness and the distortion that the door must have caused. He turned the handle slowly and stepped inside, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Our mutual friend tells me that you will introduce me to pleasures I've never imagin- ..._Clark Kent_?"

His eyes shot open as his face twisted into all manner of confusion and panic. Clark managed to mutter just two words.

"_Lex Luthor_?"

_**and now. . . . Room 7734. . . .**_

Smirking, Lex tilted his head, "I guess the deal is off."

Clark paled, "Uh, yeah!"

"Not you, that deal was never on. Don't flatter yourself, Clark. Bruno Mannheim."

Frowning, Clark recalled that name from his past. "Mannheim. The guy who was running InterGang?"

Lex poured himself a drink and leaned against the counter, "The one that shot you, I'm sure you remember. He was recently released from Strkyer Island, on a technicality I'm sure. Seems that between shooting up steroids and running the playground, Mr. Mannheim has managed to expand InterGang's territory from the inside. Even into Gotham City I hear."

"And you were going to make a deal with him?"

"I have a lot of toys for killing certain... _super-talented_... individuals, Clark. I have to make due with where the market is," he said with an innocent smile. "I understand that some friends of yours have made life difficult for them. They'd like to be able to fight back."

Clark clenched his jaw. "And this?"

Lex raised an eyebrow.

Waving his hands over his body, Clark wanted to growl, "_Me_. Coming _here_. What is this all about?"

"Well, I can only hope that you're here because your wife has rubbed off on you and you're undercover on a story," Clark nodded with a bit of a snarl going on, "I, on the other hand, I was merely hoping to complete the deal that I've been working on."

Clark frowned, "By meeting with a prostitute? I'm supposed to believe that?"

"Mr. Mannheim has a prostitution ring in Metropolis, as I'm sure you're aware.. I've been led to understand that you've met one of his former girls, she worked for a street level associate, whom worked for Mr. Mannheim. A lovely young lady named Mia? I was supposed to be meeting one of these young ladies, but instead he sent you. A man. I assume it's his way of telling me that he didn't like the price that I gave him. That caveman probably thought he was being clever too. I weep for the future of Crime," joked Lex.

There was nothing funny about the look on Clark's face. "And you would have taken advantage of some innocent girl?"

Sighing, Lex shook his head. "When you're involved with these kinds of people, Clark, you have to take a _taste_. To prove you're on the level and someone that they can trust. She wouldn't have been my first, and she wouldn't have been my last either."

"Why are you telling me this, Lex?"

Lex got up and walked closer to Clark, a small smirk was etched across his lips.

"Isn't it obvious? Mr. Mannheim isn't interested in doing business with me, Clark. Normally that's fine, but he has certain... information... that I'd rather he not have," explained Lex. His smirk started to grow slightly.

Clark frowned, "And what do I have to do with that?"

"The way I see it, we both wanna put this guy away," he started, Clark was picking up the bread crumbs. Lex gave him a full on Luthor Smirk knowing that he had finally made his friend see his point. "So _I think it's time for another Luthor/Kent team-up..._"

_**to be continued in. . . . Bruno Mannheim. . . .**_

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, how was that for Part 2? haha. I think you guys are going to be able to see where this is going now, haha, it's time for another team-up in the spirit of the Season 4, 5, and 6 days, haha. I'm sure a lot of you are relieved to see that Lex and Clark didn't end up sharing a, uh..._special night_? _together_? hahaha. But anyways, make sure to send me some reviews!

You know how the reviews make me want to post sooner! haha. Can't wait to hear from you!

**Next Up:** _John Corben_.


	221. John Corben

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - Hahaha, it is quite the notion, isn't it? haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I think you might be right about that one, haha. That shall all be revealed in good time! haha. But yeah, it should be fun to write another adventure for these two. It's been a long time since they got to team-up, on the same side, haha. Ah, I wish I had thought of that! hahaha. I can just see Lex running around with an afro and a 70's goatee or something, hahaha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm still quite surprised how much I took to Chris Kent when he first appeared in the comics and how quickly I felt like he was part of the Lane-Kent family. Maybe it's because I hadn't really considered the idea of Lois and Clark having a child of their own, and this might be as close as we get to it. Obviously, they have their own in my story thanks of a kinda-sorta crossover with another story that I love, but still. Zod's story will get picked up soon I think, haha. We shall see his evil plans, haha.

_**XOjonniXO**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! That chapter seems like a lifetime ago, hahaha. But yeah, my original thought was how much we needed a Clark Picks Lois scene in Smallville. I can't really call myself much of a Lana fan to be honest, haha. I spent the first two seasons whining about how I wanted Lois to come around, then decided to give it a chance in Season 3, and then after seeing Erica Durance as Lois in Season 4, I was pretty much praying for Lana to die from then on, hahaha.

And don't worry about long reviews! They're encouraged!

_**LaLaALa521**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! Hopefully you like the almost two hundred more! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided Metal_lois _(See what I did there? _Mesa_ clever. Yeah, I know, the Jar-Jar Binks voice is lame.)

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #221, John Corben

**Author's Note: **This continues on from chapter 215's _Metallo_, hope you guys enjoy it!

* * *

"Lois..."

She didn't look up. She was busy. Perry was breathing down her neck for the story on the Mayor's affair, and it needed to be done. "Look, I don't care if Jimmy's light-up shoes give you migraines, he's your partner. Learn to love him, and I swear to all things holy in maple doughnut heaven, if you make a joke about me and Smallville," she started to turn her head, "I will kill you- _not_ Jeff."

"I probably should have said something, huh?" he smiled nervously.

Lois gave him the "_what-the-frick?_" look, "Umm, yeah. John Corben. What are you doing here?"

John shrugged slightly, "I came to see you."

"I see that. I meant _Metropolis_. What are you doing here?"

He frowned, "I don't know what you mean."

She shook her head, "You don't remember getting hunted down? For your, you know, special _Tony Stark_ heart?"

"I did?"

Her eyes about bugged out of her head, "Yes, you did. We almost got killed. Like, _often_."

The whole incident made her appreciate having Emil on-call for medical emergencies. He had thankfully gotten over his fear that Clark would burn out his eyes for having to see Lois naked once. He was still timid though-

"Wow, I don't...I don't really remember that at all. I remember being with you, I... I feel like you were protecting me."

She snapped back to reality, "Well, I remember, and yeah, I did, but you need to be more careful, John."

John smiled at her, "You're still protecting me..."

"Yeah, I guess Superman has rubbed off on-" she saw him leaning forward, eyes closed and lips pursed, "-woah! What the hell do you think you are doing?!" she shouted as she jumped away from him. He looked confused.

"I dont... I don't understand... I thought that you loved me?"

Lois twisted her face in confusion, "No, John, if you remember your time with me, don't you remember me telling you that I had someone else? Don't you remember me telling that he was it for me? Don't you remember that?"

John started to get angry, "You protected me! You were there with me! You were going to run away with me!"

"I was going to help you get away. I was trying to save you, I wasn't trying to run away with you!

Lois furrowed her brow as she started to hear something thump. John stared at her hard. "Who is he?"

"What?" she asked as he pulled her from her thoughts.

"Who is he? Who is this other guy?"

She shook her head, "You can't be serious! John, there was never anything between us!"

He started to breathe hard. He nearly advanced on her before he noticed the name on the adjoined desk. He turned and blew out of the room, causing Lois to rip her cell phone off her desk and quickly dial Clark's number.

"Miss me alread-"

She rolled her eyes quickly, "Smallville! Shut up and listen!"

"Lois, what's wrong? Are you ok?"

"Yes, I'm fine! Just listen! You remember John Corben? The guy with the kryptonite heart?"

She could hear a clink as his glasses hit his phone as Clark did his usual '_look-away-to-think_' move. "The guy who blamed me for his sister dying? I haven't seen him since he appeared in the Fortress when I was with Zod. What about him?"

"Well, he just showed up at the Planet, and he doesn't remember anything other than the fact that he's in love with me." Now she could them squeak as he furrowed his brow and dragged the plastic slightly against his phone. "Oh, relax, you're the only one for me. The point is that he wants to kill you. And he has that kryptonite heart, you're going to need a plan."

"He won't be the first villain to try and use kryptonite against Superman, Lois."

Lois shook her head, "No, he doesn't want to kill Superman, he wants to kill Clark Kent."

"But those are the same people..."

If he was there, she would have punched him. "Nothing gets past you, Smallville. I mean he wants to kill glasses Clark, not tights Clark." She heard the squeak again, "I know, they're not tights. We know. Just be ready, ok?"

"Worried about me, Lo?"

She couldn't help but roll her eyes at the smirk she knew he had on his face, "You know the deal, I kill you, not some guy who has an iPod for a heart. Now call up Bruce and get some lead-lined tights or something."

"He's Batman, not James Bond, Lois. He doesn't exactly have _Q_ waiting in the workshop."

"Please, I know he's not James Bond. I'd notice that british accent, and I don't have to tell _you_ how sexy a british accent is." She could hear how his breath hitched just slightly. "Later. You need to focus on not dying. _Then_ hanky-panky."

"_Deal_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I know a chapter that will likely lead into a big fight chapter should probably be more serious, but after all the serious chapter we've had lately, I wanted to have some chuckles. I even worked in a James Bond joke, come on, that was chuckle worthy, haha. Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought!

Make sure to shoot me a review! Makes me post sooner!

**Next up:** It's probably going to be _Bruno Mannheim_, it's written, but I feel like it's missing something, so it might be something else._  
_


	222. Bruno Mannheim

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm definitely going to have to find a place to write that into a chapter, haha. The idea of Lex all gussied up is just too fun to pass up, hahaha. Yeah, I know that the chapters have probably been more on the serious side than the funny side in the last 50 chapters or so, but I'm trying to keep the humor in there, haha. Well, you're just going to have to find out what happens, and I think that everybody is going to be a little surprised how it all turns out, haha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**LaLaALa521**_ - I'm glad that they've been able to help with whatever you've got going on, it's always good for a writer to hear that their stories are brightening someone's day! Hopefully I'll be able to keep it up for you!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #222, Bruno Mannheim

**Author's Note: **This is part three of _**the Unexpected Team-Up**_ arc, enjoy!

* * *

"I think this is a very bad idea."

"I know."

Bruce looked up at him, "You know?"

Clark nodded, "I know that you think it's a bad idea."

"What did Lois say?"

He sighed, "She's not happy. But that's mostly because I wouldn't let her write a story about Lex Luthor ordering a male prostitute. She know that Lex probably has something up his sleeve, but so do I. And don't worry, I won't tell Oliver about this."

The look that Bruce gave him could only be described as _warning_. He finished applying the finishing touches to Clark's goatee before leaning back to examine his work. "Good. When he found out about my make-up kit for my _Matches Malone_ alias, he went on and on for a month with the mascara and lipstick jokes. He only shut up with Chloe made him start wearing a goatee for his own cover."

_**. . . .Metropolis Air-Field. . . .**_

"Wait, this is Hanger _12_, you told me that Mannheim was setting up in Hanger _14_," whispered Clark.

Lex feigned innocence. "Did I say 14? Honest mistake. Nice mustache by the way."

He moved inside as Clark shook his head. Following Lex into the hanger, Clark saw that there were several cargo-containers within the warehouse stacked on top of each other. He assumed that Mannheim used it for moving illegal items. He used his super-vision to find all of the guards, counting seven of them in total. "I see four men on the ground, and three up high with sniper rifles."

"Take them out."

Clark frowned, "What do you mean, take them _out_?"

Lex gave him an unamused look. "Normally I would mean kill them, Clark, but somehow I don't imagine you're up for that. When we get to Mannheim, we don't need any unexpected visitors. I imagine you'll do what you did to my security guards every time you've broken into one of my facilities and simply knock them unconscious. I can always do it if you can't."

He cocked his gun and smirked, causing Clark gave him a stern look. "Wait here."

In a blur of groans and clacks as bodies and guns hit the floor, the guards were gone. Clark appeared at Lex's side again, straightening his tie and mustache. Lex grinned, "You sure I can't lure you to the dark side, Clark?"

"I'm here for Mannheim."

Lex walked away, "That's a shame. We have one hell of a spread at the Legion of Doom meetings."

They found their way down a narrow hallway, there was a door to the main air-hanger. "Mannheim should be through there. When we get in there, let me do the talking. I need Mannheim to tip me off to where the information is that he has."

Clark nodded.

As he stepped forward towards the door, a henchman jumped out at Clark. Before he could react, Lex delivered a quick blow to the gut of his assailant before landing another to his jaw. Falling to the ground with a thud, the henchman groaned in pain. Clark turned and looked at Lex in shock, causing the latter to quirk an eyebrow. "What? You're not the only one that packs a wallop, Clark."

Slipping through the door, they found Mannheim talking to someone at the entrance of the hanger. They were in a black car, and when they concluded their conversation, the person got in the car and drove off.

Lex immediately darted forward towards Mannheim, "Mr. Mannheim."

Bruno ripped around, walking towards Lex. "What the hell? How did you get in here, Luthor? And who is this?"

"I'm here to talk about our deal, Bruno. This is my associate, Mr. Blue. He's just tagging along, I hope you don't mind. I wanted to let you know that I got your message. I have to say, I found it... _distasteful_."

Bruno puffed out his chest. Lex was right. The caveman was proud of himself. "You think you're a cut above the rest, Luthor. I wanted to show you what I thought of your offer. I hope you're here to give me a discount."

"I don't think I'm a cut above the rest, Bruno. I _am_ a cut above the rest. And price is no longer an issue."

"No? Then what am I looking at your bald head for?"

Stepping forward, Lex smirked to himself. "I don't like the way that you do business, Bruno. You come to me, in my city, looking for a way to deal with your problems. I try to help you out, and you send me _that_ message?"

"If you don't like the way I do business, why dontcha do something about it, Luthor," taunted Bruno.

Lex grinned, "Oh, I intend to."

Bruno grinned at the idea of a fight. He started to crack his knuckles and move about, like he thought he was about to go ten rounds with Lex Luthor in the middle of an abandoned warehouse. Lex found the whole thing laughable.

"Oh, but wait, that reminds me," Lex quickly stopped and turned to Clark. "I think you're going to need this."

Clark furrowed his brow in confusion, but before he could ask, Lex put a piece of kryptonite in his pocket. Clark quickly fell to the ground in pain, the kryptonite fell out of his pocket to his side, but remained out of view from Mannheim.

"What the hell is going on, Luthor?"

Lex pulled out his gun, smirking at Clark. "_Whoops_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Alright, things are going down to the final stretch, and there's just one more piece of the story (not including the epilogue). I wanted to give Clark and Lex a chance to trade quips like the good ole days, and of course getting to write in Bruce's bit about Matches Malone was fun too, haha. Always worrying about Oliver, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! I'm going to go ahead and post the last part next instead of doing the usual every-other-chapter thing since I'm sure you guys are gunna wanna know what happens next, haha. Shoot me some reviews as always!

**Next Up:** _Maggie Sawyer_, though I gotta admit she's barely in it, haha.


	223. Maggie Sawyer

**Review Comments:**

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - You can never count on Lex not having something up his sleeve, that's for sure.

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm pretty sure Lex could raze the Daily Planet to the ground if he saw that headline, hahaha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - There's always a chance that Lex can double cross you, and though Clark's go-to move is generally to trust even the most untrustworthy people, I think he might have a plan, haha. I guess you'll have to find out! haha.

_**XOjonniXO**_ - I'm glad that you like them! It's been tons of fun writing them!

_**Tomarisun**_ - You never really know with Lex Luthor! haha. I guess you're going to find out in this one! Oh yeah, with all the jokes that they make about Oliver's hair and stuff, I'm sure that Ollie would have a field day, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! Yeah, when I came up with that idea just out of the blue, I knew that I had to work it into a chapter, hahaha. I'm writing the whole arc out now, it's gunna be a big one, probably bigger than _the Death of Superman_. We definitely haven't seen the end of Christopher Kent, haha, I'm loving writing the current arc because it's gunna be like the ultimate mash-up of the Smallville/DC Comics universe. I'm really excited to see what you guys think of it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #223, Maggie Sawyer

**Author's** **Note:** This is the Finale for the '**_Unexpected Team-Up_**' arc, hope you guys like it!

* * *

"I asked you a question, Luthor, what the hell is this? What's wrong with your boy?"

"Your face makes him _sick_. Now..." Lex turned to reveal his gun, stepping over Clark. "On your knees, Mr. Mannheim."

Bruno glared at him, flexing his muscles. "Why don't you _make_ me?"

"Certainly."

Without hesitation, Lex fired off a round that capped Bruno's knee. He fell to the ground as he screamed in agony. Lex scoffed, "What is it with you, tough guys? What is all your strength worth when I've got the gun?"

He shot Clark a look, and even though he didn't say anything, Clark could hear what he was thinking. '_Or the kryptonite._'

Lex aimed his gun at Bruno's face.

"What do you have on him?" groaned Clark, grimacing in pain. "Whatever you have on Luthor, just give it to him. Just give it to him and we can go. That's all he wants from you, Mannheim. That's what he's here for."

Smirking, Lex turned towards Clark. "He doesn't have anything on me, Mr. Blue. I only told you that so you'd agree to come."

"What?"

"I needed your help to get to him. To get past his men. If I had brought my men, things would have been loud and messy. I needed this done nice and neat. My men come, the police will follow quickly after. We do this quick and quiet, his men find him. Like I want."

Clark gritted his teeth as he tried to move, but the pain was too much.

Pressing the cold steel against Bruno's head, Lex leaned down. "It's a shame that we couldn't make a deal, Bruno," he cooed. "We could have been a very profitable relationship. Unfortunately you didn't have to foresight to see that."

"Please... We can make the deal... I'll make the deal with you..."

Lex shook his head, "This isn't about the _deal _anymore, Bruno. This is about how you turned it down. I'm a business man. Sometimes deals fall through. This is about _respect_. I'm showing the crime world what happens when you disrespect a Luthor, Bruno. When your men see what the consequences of crossing me are, I'll own them and your little _InterGang_ project."

He stood. "You might want to close your eyes, Mr. Blue. I don't know if you want to see this."

His finger curled around the trigger, and Clark could just hear the gears starting to click and turn. It would only be a moment and Bruno would be dead. He would be dead and it'd be Clark's fault. Unless...

_**wooooooooooosh-THUNK!**_

The arrow nailed Lex in the shoulder, causing him to shoot off target and spare Bruno's life. Lex had dropped the gun in pain. Clark sighed in relief that Oliver was able to figure out Lex had intentionally told him the wrong warehouse and managed to find them.

Lex growled as his ripped the arrow out of his shoulder, "Green Arrow..."

"Oh thank god," sighed Bruno.

Stepping forward, Lex kicked Bruno square in the face and knocked him unconscious. "Shut it."

Another arrow shot out of the darkness, landing with a clink right next to the piece of kryptonite. "Your aim must be getting a little rusty, Green Arrow," taunted Lex. "Can't even hit a hunk of kryptonite these days?"

He could faintly hear laughing in the darkness.

Suddenly, the arrow tip erupted, spraying a clay-type material in a twelve inch circle, covering and neutralizing the Kryptonite. Before he could even react, Clark was standing in front of Lex. "You didn't think I came without a back-up plan, did you?"

Lex was almost impressed.

A crash from behind caught his attention before he could say something witty, a team of police burst into the warehouse armed to the teeth. Lex ripped around to snarl, but Superman was nowhere to be seen. Lex chuckled to himself as the police surrounded him.

"What's so funny, Mr. Luthor?" asked Maggie Sawyer as she approached him with a smile of her own.

He grinned at her. "Just thinking about _tax evasion_, Detective Sawyer."

"Whatever floats your boat, Luthor. We got an an anonymous tip that we might find you and Mr. Mannheim here, along with enough weapons and ammunition to put you behind bars," she taunted. "I hope you've got a fancy lawyer on tap."

Lex wasn't paying attention, he just looked up at the moon as it shined through the skylight. He couldn't know for sure, but there was an unfamiliar dark spot in the dead center. He had a feeling it might be someone watching with a smirk.

"Well played, Mr. Blue."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Luckily Oliver was there to help save the day, though it was Clark that knew that Lex was going to double-cross him at some point! For those that might be wondering about the "tax evasion" line, that shall be revealed in the epilogue known as _the Gentleman's Agreement_ that will be posted after the next chapter.

Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought! Hopefully it wasn't too obvious that Oliver was going to come and help Clark, I had to drop the "different warehouse" line in the last chapter to set-up why it took so long for Clark to get back-up, I hope I didn't show my hand too much, haha. Anyways, shoots me some reviews! You know they make me post faster!

**Next Up:** _the Eighth Floor_.


	224. the Eighth Floor

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - I love Oliver and Green Arrow, so it's always fun to get to write him. I think I leave him out a lot, his Green Arrow persona anyways, because I feel a kind of subconscious need to get the heroes we didn't really get to see on the show like Batman, Wonder Woman, and Green Lantern. Ollie is still a great character, so I'm glad you liked it.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad that I didn't show my hand! haha. And yes, I'm sure that Lois will be all over this one, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Folically challenged goon! hahahaha. I love that! I think I need to have Lois say that! hahaha. But yes, Lex did have a separate agenda as usual, haha. And I'm glad you approve, haha. I can't have Clark looking too dumb all the time! haha. I've been feeling like I need to show Ollie some love. Maybe it's because I've been watching Arrow, and I miss my Ollie, even though the show is pretty decent. I still like my Oliver Queen more Tony Stark than Bruce Wayne, so I missed him, haha.

Ummmm, no Lois in the Gentleman's Agreement, but that doesn't mean we won't see Lois confront ole Lex very soon. She is going to have a bone to pick with him, haha. And she has a pretty kick-butt scene in this one! Enjoy!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And yeah, I was trying to give it that vibe! I wanted to have ourselves a little throwback to the Clark and Lex team-up days. It's moments like these that really give depth to that rivalry, so I'm glad you caught that and liked it!

**Author**: CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided John/Lois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #224, the Eighth Floor

**Author's Note:** This is the finale to the storyline started in _Metallo_, continued in _John Corben_, and concluded here. Enjoy!

* * *

"Clark Kent?"

Turning around, "Yes?"

Metallo delivered a hard right hook to Clark's jaw. "I am here to kill you and take Lois Lane."

Falling onto Cat Grant's desk, Clark tried to not see the little Batman's circling his head. Before he could react, Metallo had him by the back of the shirt and flipped him onto Jimmy's desk. "That didn't feel so good..." he moaned to himself.

'_My powers are gone with him around..._' he realized. '_Even without his heart exposed, the amount of kryptonite pumping through his veins is enough to make me human... I'm going to have to win this fight without them..._'

Lois ripped out their office and saw a sight-to-see in the center of the newsroom, "John! No!"

The thought quickly passed as Clark saw a fist rocketing towards his skull, but he managed to turn on his side and avoid the blow. His punch left a large dent in Jimmy's desk, causing Metallo to get angry again and try to deliver a double forearm slam to Clark. Rolling off the desk, Clark avoided another critical blow. Hitting the floor, Clark shouted to Jimmy, "Throw me your camera!"

Reacting out of '_do what Mr. Kent and Ms. Lane say_' instinct and not thinking about how he blew his last paycheck on this camera, he swung it towards Clark. Grabbing the band, Clark swung the camera and shattered it against Corben's face.

"Don't worry, I'll replace it, Jimmy," Clark muttered before tackling Metallo over the desk behind him as Corben was dazed.

Ripping the stereo off of Cat Grant's desk, Clark crashed it into Metallo's head. Lois pushed past Cat and reached in Cat's purse, "We _won't_ be replacing that headache machine." Corben growled as he knocked Clark off of him and into the next row of desks.

"John! Stop! You don't have to do this!"

He flipped the desk out of his way, "I must _kill_ Clark Kent. He stands in our way, Lois."

"No, he doesn't!" she shouted. He turned, thinking that Lois had chosen him or something. "_I_ do," she announced as she sprayed his eyes with hairspray she swiped from Cat's purse. Blinded, he stumbled around and away from Clark and towards the windows.

Lois ran over to Clark, whom Jimmy was help stand up. "Are you ok, Smallville?"

"Yeah," he groaned.

She gave him a worried look, "We need to call someone..."

Clark looked at Jimmy's watch for a second, "Did you turn that on yet, Jimmy?"

"Of course, CK. I can't believe Superman hasn't showed up yet, he must be _really_ busy."

"I'm sure he is, Jimmy," assured Clark. '_It's worth a shot, I've got to get him out of here before he hurts somebody, besides me, of course..._'

Lois eyed him for a second, "What are you going to do?"

He swallowed deeply, "The only thing that I can do. I'm going to knock him out the _window_."

"Oh... _Wait_, _what_?" she shrieked as Clark tore off towards Metallo and the window of the eighth floor of the Daily Planet. Metallo's optical sensors corrected themselves just in time to see the Smallville High 2004 State Championship MVP hurdling into him.

The blow sent them both out of the eighth story window, and Clark knew that he was in trouble. Never mind the fact that if he survived this, the entire Daily Planet was going to find out his secret, but if he guessed wrong here, he was going to _die_. When they hit the pavement below, the kryptonite exposure coupled with an eight story fall would kill him.

"Stupid, Kent..." the mangled voice box of Metallo managed. "You will not survive this fall, and I will finally have my Lois..."

Clark wasn't so sure that he was wrong as he saw the taxi's and hot dog venders getting dangerously close. He closed his eyes as he tried to brace himself for impact, hoping that landing on Metallo would cushion his fall. You know, as much as falling on a steel robot could.

Metallo squeaked and buzzed again, "Prepare to die... Clark Kent..."

"Not today."

A jerk separated Clark from Metallo, and when he opened his eyes, he saw Metallo crash into the ground several feet. Clark jerked up and looked above, seeing his savior holding onto his shoulder. Clark let out a sigh of relief, "_Kara_."

They floated down to the street below, and Kara let Clark stand on his own two legs. Quite frankly, he had never been so happy to be on solid ground in his entire life. "I was starting to get worried that you couldn't hear Jimmy's signal-watch."

"You risked your life thinking that I would be able to save you?" Clark nodded. "How did you know that I would hear Jimmy's watch?"

Clark grimaced for a second, "I _didn't_."

"Kal-El..." she said in a harsh whisper.

He held up a hand. "People were in danger, Kara... Save the lecture. Besides, I'm already going to hear it when she gets down-"

"Smallville!"

Kara smiled to herself as Clark tensed up, causing what were surely broken ribs to throb.

Lois ran towards him and gripped him tightly, causing those broken ribs to throb even worse. "I swear, if you ever do anything like that again, I'm going to _kill_ you. Do hear me? _Kill_ you." Before he could respond, she jammed their lips together in a hard kiss.

"Who needs Superman when you've got Clark Kent to save the day?" chuckled Jimmy.

_**. . . .later. . . .**_

Clark grimaced as he sat down on the bumper of the ambulance, holding his ribs. Lois wrapped an arm around him, rubbing the back of his neck as they tried to act normal. "I know it hurts, Smallville, but we have to put on the show."

"I know, as soon as we get away from Corben, I'll heal and I'll be fine."

Before they could say another word about the matter, they saw Steve Lombard walking up. On cue, Clark let out an exaggerated groan of pain to play it up for their colleague. "Geeze, Kent. You sure can take a beating."

Nodding, Clark smiled, "Thanks, Mr. Lombard."

Steve smirked at Lois, "Definitely makes this marriage make sense now, I was pretty sure Lane could snap you in two."

The smile gone from his face, Clark look unamused, "Thanks, Steve."

With a hearty laugh, Steve clapped Clark on the shoulder, sending pain vibrating down his body. Lois growled to herself as Lombard walked off into the crowd, surely to find some doughnuts or something. "I'm going to shove his stupid football up his-"

"Lois," warned Clark.

She rolled her eyes, "Can we get out of here so I can kiss your ouchies all better already?"

Clark suddenly stood up, "You know, I'm feeling much better, I think that we can get out of here."

"That's my boy, Smallville," she smirked.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. I wanted a straight up, Clark Kent vs. Metallo finale here, and hopefully I managed to pull it off! It's more difficult than you might think to write an action scene for Clark that can happen in front of the Daily Planet brass, so hopefully it is believable and what not. Of course, it helps to have Lois and Kara as your back-up, haha. Oh, and speaking of back-ups, I hope everyone is reading their Smallville: Season 11's! They're getting pretty darn good.

Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought! Shoot me some reviews, people! haha.

**Question For You Guys:** Also, I wanted to bounce something off you guys... I've got an idea, that would diverge pretty much entirely from this story and be a bit of an AU thing. I've mentioned it before, kind of a _Flashpoint_ situation that would result in a non-_Smallville_ and non-_DC Comics _continuity story, but would include elements from both that I really enjoy. Including Clois, don't worry, haha. In a lot of ways, it's what I'd write if I got to write Superman at the start of the _New 52_.

It wouldn't come at a price, I wouldn't stop writing this, but it'd be more of a 'one week I post _Kill Me or Kiss Me_, the next week I post in _Flashpoint_' kind of deal. It wouldn't take place in this universe though, at least not really. Anyways, what I'm interested to hear is if you guys would like to read a non-_Smallville_ continuity Superman story written by me. No pressure, just wondering!

**Next Up:** _the Gentleman's Agreement_, the epilogue to _**the Unexpected Team-Up**_ arc.


	225. A Gentleman's Agreement

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And yeah, I need to show Kara some love more often. And thanks for the kind words, but I'm just building off what has been almost 80 years of excellent Superman stories and characters. I'd be honored to work at DC.

_**RPadavan2**_ - I'm glad that you have enjoyed them! I've been trying to add some more length into the storylines, trying to do something a little different because after 200+ chapters, you've gotta do something new, right? haha. And thanks, I'm leaning more and more all the time towards this other story, and I wouldn't be surprised if I post it sooner than later given all the kind words from you guys!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I wanted to do something different, show that Clark is still a hero even without his powers. And yes, there will always be Clois where you see the name _CaptainTightpants12_, haha. They're a _big_ reason why I want to do the new story.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I wanted to do something a little bit different and give Clark a chance to put up his dukes on his own, so I'm glad that you guys liked it! I'm glad that there was some suspense! haha. And as for the kryptonite, in my mind, she wasn't really affected by it since she kind of swooped in to grab Clark very quickly. I probably should have made that more clear, haha.

Yes, it'd be a completely independent story, as well as AU from both Smallville and the comics. It'd pretty much be, "if DC hired me to reboot Superman, how would I do it?" There will be elements from almost every version of the character, with some definitely bits from Smallville, most notably the Clois relationship. But it will have stuff from the movies, Lois & Clark, the animated projects, and the comics to kind of build what I'd consider my "_ideal_" Superman story.

Well, if you can't find them at the comic book store, I know Katlynne had a hard time finding them, I'd recommend Comixology. I'm not a big fan of digital comics, but they do a great job with them. I like the feel of a comic in my hand and then seeing all my collected comics in my room, but Comixology does a great job and they're very well priced for what you're getting.

I enjoy the show so far, but I'll warn you, it's basically Bruce Wayne with a bow-and-arrow. Oliver Queen is by far more Tony Stark than he is Bruce Wayne, but the show is going for a dark, broody version of Oliver. But like I said, it's a good show.

_**cathy03**_ - Glad you liked them! And I'm glad I kept you in the dark! Sometimes I really worry that I'm showing my hand, it's hard when you're writing to do that, so I'm glad to hear that! And I'm glad you liked one with Metallo!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I wanted to show that Clark is a hero even without his powers, so I'm glad it worked! I love me some Clois too, especially the Smallville Clois. I'd love to work at DC, and I'd love to bring Clois back into the fold even though I'm ok with the fact they erased the marriage. We had to do something to refresh those characters, and I'm excited to see their love story unfold again. And if you're going to tell it, you have to start with their rivalry, because that's what is the foundation of their relationship. They strive to make each other better everyday. I always say, there's three reasons why Clark becomes Superman:

The Kent's _belief_ in him, Clark's _hope_ in himself, and Lois' _expectation_ of him. The Kents give Superman his morals, Clark gives Superman his compassion, and Lois gives Superman his determination to live up to the hero she believes him to be.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #225, A Gentleman's Agreement

**Author's Note: **This is the kind-of-sort-of epilogue for the whole _Metro-Ritz/Room 7734/Brunno Mannheim_ arc, enjoy!

* * *

Their new meeting grounds. That's what Lois liked to call it.

Once upon it time, it had been his office in the Luthor Mansion. Other times, it was the loft in the Kent Barn. A place where they could stand toe-to-toe and have their angst-filled stares and parting blows. Now it was Stryker's Island. The same glass-paned cell, reserved for Strkyer's most infamous visitor. They called him a _visitor_ because he never stayed long. Charges never stuck to this one.

His footsteps thundered down the narrow passageway through the highest-security area that Strkyer's possessed. He knew this walk like the back of his hand. Three cells down from Rudy Jones, five cells down from John Corben.

Lois hated coming. She said she felt like _Clarice Starling_. Clark wasn't really sure what that meant.

It was an all too familiar sight. His orange jump-suit padded his back as he leaned against the steel walls opposite the glass. His head was down, but his eyes flicked up to see his nemesis standing before him. Red and and blue reflecting off the glass, hands on hips.

"Al Capone." His grin was almost one of approval as he kicked off the wall. He had been thinking about two things since the docks. _Tax Evasion_, and _Al Capone_. "Somehow, I feel like my father is trying to taunt me through you."

For once, it was Clark's turn to flash the smirk. "If I couldn't get you on the charges I wanted, I had to go for the next best thing."

"I'm almost impressed. I guess you were listening to my lectures after all. But you have to know this won't stick."

He almost shrugged. "I'm sure that your lawyers will come up with some ridiculous story for some judge you've bought off, but it'll keep you out of my hair for a couple weeks. The load off my mind is enough for me."

Lex feigned innocence. "I'm not getting under your skin, am I? I'd hate to be a bother."

"I'll see you around, Luthor," he retorted.

As he started to walk away, he could literally hear the muscles moving in Lex's face as an all too familiar smirk began to form. A smirk that was chilling to the bone because it always meant one thing: _This isn't over_.

"You know... The Al Capone thing? It goes both ways." Enough to halt him in his movements, but not enough to turn around. Clark gave him just a head turn, just enough to let him know that he was listening. "If I can't hurt you, I can always do the next best thing..."

That brought Clark back to his cell in a hurry. "What did you say?"

Lex had a smile, but his eyes said something else entirely as he approached the glass. "It'd be a shame if our favorite intrepid reporter stuck her neck out too far. Or perhaps that little photographer you're so of has an accident on that scooter of his."

A snarl etched across Clark's face. Lex simply became more amused by the second.

"The mind reels with the possibilities..." he cooed before taking on a much more serious expression. "Just because we had a little fun, just because we have our little banter, doesn't mean you should forget that I'm the villain here. I'm not overly fond of prison food, Clark. That alone would be enough to make me... _agitated_. I smile through my teeth and play nice because I find it oh so amusing. I like watching your skin crawl. But I'm not amused right now. Don't think that I won't _kill_... _them_... _all_."

With a red glow in his eyes, Clark started to growl, "If you ever threaten-"

"You'll what?" He had Clark there and they both knew it. "I'm the bad guy here. Our little gentleman's agreement is all that stands between them and my gun to their heads. You put me in here over some bush league arms deal? It makes me not so interested in being gentlemanly, Clark. Just keep that in mind when you lay down tonight next to _Lois_."

In a flash, the glass was shattered and Clark was holding Lex three feet off the ground by his neck. The only sounds a bystander might have heard were Clark's breathing, Lex's groaning, and the glass crackling under red boots. As the security team rushed down the hall and outside of the room, Lex managed a grin and to mutter, "And there's my get-out-of-jail-free card..."

"Superman! Put Luthor down now!"

Clark let him fall to the ground, but in a flash, he had Lex pinned against the wall. His eyes were pure rage, and Lex knew it. Clark leaned in to growl into Lex's ear so that only he could hear him, "If you ever cross _that_ line... You're going to see exactly what I'll do. That agreement goes _both_ ways. I don't kill, that's _my_ line..." a sinister look took over his eyes, "...but that doesn't mean you have to _walk_ or eat _solid_ food ever again... You ever use her name like that again... It's _over_..."

He turned on a dime and pushed past the guards, blurring his way out of the prison. Lex cracked his neck and flattened out the front of his jumpsuit, tracing his fingers through the holds that Clark's fingers left from his grip. Lex grinned to himself.

"Not _that's_ more like it..."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, what did you think? I know I tend to write Lex as almost friendly with Clark, and that's mainly because I think it's all the scarier when Lex says something threatening in a charming way. But it's always nice to see Lex flat out scary too. Just to remind us all that Lex could kill everyone at the Daily Planet without thinking twice about it.

I also wanted to introduce the notion that there is a gentleman's agreement between Lex and Clark. Like a, "_You don't tell my secret or go after the ones I love, and I won't sweat the little stuff,_" type of deal. And as we see here, Lex thinks this was below the belt, so he has to remind Clark that just because he smiles and banters, he still intends to cut Clark's throat someday and it'd be a shame if he had to take it out on Lois or Jimmy or even Perry or maybe someone in the League.

Anyways, just an idea I had and ran with it, let me know what you guys thought!

**Next Up:** _Tempus, Part 1._


	226. Tempus, Part 1

**Review Comments:**

_**Lilbit4**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I feel like Lex knows that Clark wouldn't do anything unless Lex really crossed a line, that's why I didn't have him trembling in fear. But should he cross that line, I think we will see a legit scared Lex.

**_Jas-El_** - I think I kind of came up with the idea for the conversation after watching _the Avengers_ for the 1000th time, so there's a very good chance I was channelling some Loki at the time, haha. I'm glad I could make him scary, haha. I've had a few ideas for a Batman/Superman adventure, especially with their team-up in the recent Season 11 comics, and I love that line you just gave me, I'm thinking there might be a chapter in the very near future now!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I love those villains who can be really scary without dropping their normal charm. Those were always the ones I found the most unnerving. I didn't like Lex in _Lois & Clark_ either, but Tempus was great, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - That was the idea! haha. I wanted to do something that really broke it all down to it's core in that even though Lex is charming and banter-y, he is still the _true_ villain of the story. I wanted to make him a bit scary again, haha. A lot of people wondered why Lex wouldn't just reveal Clark identity or go after the ones he cares most about, but I've always had this kind of idea of a code of war or something, and that's where this Gentleman's Agreement came to mind.

It's like to Lex, it's just too easy. It'd be too easy to reveal his identity to the world. He wants to beat Clark on his best day, not his weakest. Lex wants to prove he is the best, and you can only do that by defeating Clark at _his_ best. Well, _Smallville: Season 11 #7_ goes on sale at comic book stores on wednesday, so that's always an option too. Only a few days away!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I really wanted to shake things up from the normal banter, charming Lex that I tend to write. It seemed like the perfect spot to re-assert the fact that Lex is still the ultimate bad guy.

_**HuroiHanabixShenny**_ - I'm glad that you have enjoyed the story so far! And yes, _You Make My Daddy Sick_ is a gem. And Jo'an is such a great character, I couldn't help but get her permission to add her into my story. And I say that as someone who generally isn't a fan of Clois having a kid or kids. Jo'an was just a great representation of what that child might be like.

She'll always be present, even though I haven't had her a chapter in a little while. I have one sitting in my Doc Manager that I just don't know quite what it needs, but it needs something. Ah, that's definitely got a lot of potential, I'll think something up for that!

_**Katlynne**_ - You are just too sweet to me, you know that? Uhuh, I loved writing Hal and Bruce together, haha. Lois has never been a fan of Cat Grant or her NPR, haha. I know you told me you would, and you're far too good to me for having done it. Now onto Tempus!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #226, Tempus, Part 1

**Author's Note:** So, this is a bit of a prelude for a little three-or-four part arc for a very special lady, so I hope you all enjoy it!

* * *

Tempus eyed his scotch in the glow of the lights from the display. His face scrunched up in disgust.

"_The Legion of Super-Heroes helped usher in the newest wing of the History of Superman Museum today with a Justice League exhibit featuring the Lasso of Truth and real batarangs recovered from the recently discovered Bat Cave of Gotham City..._"

A grimace etched across his face as they flashed around the infamous letter "_S_" a few more times. '_Oh how I hate that bloody symbol. The symbol of a world of peace. A world free of greed and crime. A world so boring that I'd like to blow my brains out! But wait, there are no guns in our Utopia. A Utopia where no one works. No one argues. No one does anything!_'

He clicked the controller, but every channel only cared to air the press conference at the Superman Museum.

'_Nine thousand channels and all I can find is this bloody travesty. Oh what I'd give to live in a world where I could turn on the television and see someone...someone just...care about something!_' he ranted to himself.

Downing his scotch in a big swig, "Oh what I'd give to change history."

He finally resigned himself to watching the press conference. Rokk Krinn was speaking at a podium, about how this Justice League was a wonderous group of heroes no doubt. He briefly wondered if that idiot Lightning Lad would get up and botch his own speech.

It was in that moment that Tempus saw the ring on Krinn's hand. A Legion ring.

'_Didn't I see something about how it could allow a man to move through time?_' he wondered.

Tempus stood up and started to grin to himself. '_If I could get my hands on one of those, I could fix this all!_' Pacing around the room, he pulled up the map feature on his communicator to find the Legion Citadel. He grinned like a mad man._  
_

_'If I could get my hand on a Legion ring, I can save the future. I can kill the Man of Steel!_'

_**. . . .the present. . . .**_

"The mere fact that we're even having this conversation tells me he hasn't gone back in time yet, at least not to a time where he can hurt you," Rokk explained. He looked to Lois. "You know that a Legion ring can be unpredictable to an untrained user."

Lois gave him an unamused look, "Har har."

"I'll have to find him, and stop him. Is there any way that you can tell where is going?"

Rokk shook his head, "I'm afraid not. Not until after it will be too late. And you know the consequences of changing a fate after it has happened. It is against Legion code to change one's fate. Even for you, Kal-El."

Lois gave him a stern look. "He isn't going to die. We're going to go back and make sure of that."

Clark turned, "We?"

"I'm going with you, Smallville. How many times do you have to get into trouble before you realize you need back-up?"

He shook his head, "Lois, this could be danger-"

"Shut it, Smallville. We have to go back right now, you don't have time to call someone who wears tights outside the bedroom. I'm going with you and we're going to kick this Tempus guy's ass," she told him sternly.

Rokk gave Clark a defeated look, "I'm not going to argue with her. In the future, the expression is no longer '_being between a rock and a hard place_' but '_being between a rock and Lois Lane_.' But we still don't know when you need to go back to."

"I might be able to help with that."

The trio turned to see an all too familiar Manhunter from Mars standing in the entrance to the Loft. Lois grinned to herself, "Are you going to do that little magic trick where you read people's minds? Where's a chocos cookie when you need one?"

"I believe that with some concentration, I should be able to reach out to this person."

Clark frowned, "Even through time and space?"

"Irma can't even do that," stated Rokk.

Lois moved to stand beside J'onn, "I don't know how _Irma_ does things, but my boy _Marvin_ here does horoscopes like no other."

J'onn grinned to himself. He enjoyed her sense of humor. "It will be a challenge, but I believe that I can."

He closed his eyes, allowing himself to transform into his martian form. It took all of his concentration, and that included the focus he used to maintain his human appearance. After a moment, he started to speak.

"2005..."

Lois nodded, "Keep going, J'onn... You've got this..."

J'onn began to twist his brow in concentration. "April..."

"This is amazing," whispered Rokk.

After what almost looked like a painful expression, J'onn let out a breath of relief. He returned to his human form and looked out at the trio with a smile. "This Tempus will try to attack on April 29th, 2005. If you go then, you should be able to stop him then."

Clark grinned and grabbed his friend by the shoulder, "Thank you, J'onn. I guess we've got a date."

"Good. Now, Clark Kent..." she held out her hand with a smirk, "Will you time-travel with me?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Ole Tempus is from the New Adventures of Lois and Clark, but I felt like he'd be right at home in our Smallville universe, haha. Had to tweak a few things, replace HG Wells with a Legion ring and such, but I hope it still worked. Anyways, like I said, more of a prelude than anything, the real fun will start in Part 2 and we'll have ourselves a good ole present day Clois stuck in Season 4 kind of fun, haha. Make sure to shoot me a review and tell me what you thought!

Also, tomorrow is the big day, and I hope that everyone that is 18 and older will be making sure to go out and vote. I don't care who you plan on voting for, but I do hope you vote. It's a very important part of being an adult, and this election is very important because there will be Supreme Court selections as well. I just wanted to remind everybody that tomorrow is the last day to vote, I don't want to start any political debates or anything, just hoping everyone gets a chance to say their piece at the polls. Thanks!

**Next Up:** _the Elite_.


	227. the Elite

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - He was a great character, wasn't he? haha. Lois & Clark actually had some really great stuff that goes unnoticed, and Tempus is definitely one of them. I'm glad that you liked it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I always thought the HG Wells thing was kind of cheesy, so I wasn't sad to cut him out of the story, haha. The ring is definitely going to give Lois and Clark a hard time, I'll say that much, hahaha. Lois is definitely in the driver's seat in this one, haha. We won't see Clark naked, but it's definitely going to come up, hahaha. And I think you'll love how it does, hahaha.

_**C.A.M.S. 22**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It seemed like the ideal way to go.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - The story was really great in the comics, and the movie was really great. I hope that you guys like what I did with it, I went in a very different direction with it. Clark definitely has a lot to say in this one, I'll leave it at that, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - I'm excited to see what you'll think then! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - Hardly a big deal. You are such a _spaz_, hahahaha.

_**cherylnixon**_ - I'm glad that you liked them! I love writing Jonathan, Ollie, and Lucy, so I'm glad they were among your favorites!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I really need to write more chapters with just Lois and members of the League, haha. I really love the dynamics that get built between her and the various heroes. The struggle between Ollie and Lois about who made the bigger impact in Clark becoming Superman, or how her and Zatanna are always getting into trouble, haha. It's fun stuff.

You'll see why he picked that particular time-frame, it'll be more about the time-frame than the specific date.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #227, the Elite

**Author's Note:** This is loosely based on the _**Superman vs. the Elite**_ issue from Action Comics, though instead of rehashing what was already a great animated adaptation (that I _highly_ recommend, btw), I've gone a different route. Hope you like it!

* * *

Perry White sat at his desk.

Cigar in his mouth and feet propped up, he had one of those smiles on his face. It was one of those smiles that was unseen, but usually led to a pass-by in the newsroom where he'd slow down a step or two and bark at you. "_Done good, Son,_" he might say. He was a big fan of the classics, and it didn't get much more classic than the Man of Steel. He kept re-reading his favorite parts over and over.

_The Elite have come and gone. The terrible foursome arose from a tragedy, but the greater tragedy might have been the wool they pulled over the world's eyes. Spouting off reasoning that violence was the only plan of action for the threats to the world, killing their foes in cold blood because "the right thing to do" was outdated and futile, the Elite had themselves a good run. Until Superman that is._

_Known by some as the Big Blue Boy Scout, it was no surprise to find Superman at odds with the Elite. And when push came to shove, it was Superman who saved us yet again. Not just by defeating the Elite, but by doing it his way. When he showed us just how powerful he could be, that he could wipe out all four of the Elite on his own, in a horrible way that could match their sadistic nature. He showed us what we didn't want to see our greatest hero become. __He showed us that with all of his power, he could be something terrifying._

_But instead, he did not destroy them as the Elite would have done had they been in his shoes. And it's in that way, that Superman saves us all. While other heroes are clashing like water against rock against crime and corruption, Superman stands for even more. He is more than just an inspiration for other heroes, but an inspiration for every man, woman, and child that walks this planet._

Even Steve Lombard couldn't look away from the paper in his hands. Ron Troupe occasionally looked up over his own copy to amuse himself as Lombard mouthed the words and furrowed his brow. The ole Trouper figured that this was as interested in a story as Lombard could be without _pictures_ in it. Though Troupe had to admit, this was one hell of a story.

And more importantly, it was the story that the people needed. _Desperately_.

_The world is all too filled by the loud, the angry, and the scared. It is those that could rally around a force such as the Elite. They look and see the revolving doors on prisons, government corruption, and the horrors done by the maniacs and the deranged. It's enough to make anyone's blood boil. Sometimes Superman's "Truth, Justice, and American Way" just doesn't make it feel any better._

_Not in a world where people want the quick and the easy. They want results. But Superman is walking a much longer and difficult path. A true hero's path. He stands for these things, not just because it's the moral code in which he fights with, but because he attempts to inspire and teach us all how to truly be better. That there is a better way out there. He is leading by example, because he is the one man strong enough to walk that path. It would be easy to fall astray, it would be easy to take the easier path. But as he showed us in his show down with the Elite, is that really the kind of Superman that we want?_

_Superman is the voice of Compassion and Faith instead of the darker, easier Spite and Anger. He is the one man that believes in humanity strongly enough that he'd die to protect it. He has a dream of a world where dignity, honor, and justice is a dream we all share. And he will never stop fighting for it. Now isn't that the kind of Superman we want? I do, and I believe you do too. _

"I've gotta tell you, Smallville..." she smiled. "I don't like you being all better at my job than me."

Clark chuckled and shook his head, "There's _nobody_ better than, Lois Lane, dear."

She looped her arm in his, making their way out of their office and across the newsroom. As they passed by, different reporters shouted or stood up to clap him on the shoulder. Lois murmured something into his ear about being hungry because Lombard hit Jimmy with a football and knocked over and ruined all the maple doughnuts. Clark just grinned and pressed the button on the elevator, but nobody noticed that they were going up instead of down. Not when they were busy pondering a final thought.

_So ask yourself: **What's so funny about Truth, Justice, and the American Way?**_

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you guys think? haha. At the end of the comic, there's kind of this moment where it seems that Clark has written an article about what happened with the Elite and it inspired me to write a chapter where he wrote an article. And I've had a lot of talks about why Superman is _the_ hero of the comic book world, and I just wanted to put that all out there.

Anyways, make sure you shoot me a review and let me know what you thought about it! Reviews make me post faster!

**Next up:** _Tempus, Part 2_.


	228. Tempus, Part 2

**Review Comments:**

_**dessie 77**_ - I'm glad that you're enjoying it!

_**Speed Reader**_ - It was definitely an enjoying chapter to write! I loved writing it! I'm glad that you enjoyed it and are having fun reading my story, I do it for you guys!

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It felt like a good opportunity to really show why I love this character.

_**C.A.M.S 22** _- If you guys wanna read it, I'll write it, I was just trying to avoid retreading that same story and coming at it from another angle. But I wouldn't be surprised if I write it one of these days.

_**whynot1993**_ - Yeah, normally I would have Lois write it, but it was his name under the article in the comic, so I just went with it. I agree, Lois and Clark do rock, haha. My all-time favorite couple.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Yeah, I was just kind of inspired by that last page and decided to just go for it. I'm glad nobody thought Clark was being braggy or arrogant or anything like that. Always glad to help, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**cherylnixon**_ - Food jokes with Bart are always fun! I'm glad you're still enjoying them!

_**Katlynne**_ - Crazy lady. You're too good to me!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - Take your time! I'm not going anywhere! haha. I'm glad that you're enjoying them!

_**sass8**_ - Not a problem at all, I can completely understand that! I'm glad you liked it!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #228, Tempus, Part 2

**Author's Note: **Sorry it took so long to get this out, folks! I've been crazy busy! Any ways, here you go! Enjoy!

* * *

"What are you doing here?"

Clark froze. He knew that _voice_. He knew that _tone_. He was in _trouble_. He slowly turned around, "Hey... _Lois_."

She narrowed her eyes and waved her fingers in circles over her face, "Since when do you wear glasses?"

"Uh, I uh... I'm in a play. For school. I have to play a nerd," he stammered nervously as he jammed his glasses into his pocket. He was pretty sure that he broke them in his nervousness, but luckily Lois always carried spares. The _other_ Lois.

Giving him the ole Lane head wag, she smirked, "Talk about perfect casting. You ok? You look kind of... _different_."

Clark's eyes darted nervously, he was almost ten years older than he should be. "What do you mean?"

"You look, _older_. Did you cut your hair?"

"Uh... Yeah. The whole... All-American Rejects thing is so... I was over it. I guess."

Lois looked at him funny, "Uhuh. Shouldn't you be at football practice or something?"

"Footb- Oh, yeah, I should uh, I should get going then," he said in a weird voice that Lois, '_other Lois_' he had to remind himself, would have smacked him for using in a situation like this. '_When you're duping a source, you've got to be cool, Smallville!_'

"Perfect, I need a ride anyways. Chloe needs a hand with something at the Torch."

Clark froze. "A ride?"

"In the truck? You know, big box with wheels? Go _vroom vroom_?"

"Oh, right, the _truck_. Of course."

Lois shook her head, "Yeah, what did you think you were gunna do? _Fly_?"

The ride to Smallville High, or _Cornfield High_ as Lois muttered under her breath about a hundred times, was awkward to say the least. Clark was trying his best not to tip Lois off to his current situation, and well, Lois was always better at disguises and acting than he was. The irony was not lost on him.

"Geeze, Smallville, don't talk my ear off," she jabbed.

She made for the radio, clicking the dial until she heard her favorite band belting out a little _Here I Go Again_. She slumped back into her seat, and glanced over at her unusually plaid-less company. To her surprise, there was no look to annoyance. In fact, he tapped his knee along to the beat of the music.

"What's wrong with you?"

Clark swallowed, "What?"

"No snappy line about Whitesnake? No whining about hair bands?"

"I guess you're just growing on me, Lois," he offered awkwardly.

Lois turned full in her seat, "Ok, what the hell?!"

His eyes got big, "What now?!"

"Since when do you say that line, and not add _'like a fungus'_ or something?" she asked with a look of supreme confusion. "And why the hell aren't you wearing plaid?"

"I thought you hated my plaid," he smirked.

She narrowed her eyes, "There is something different about you. And if you don't tell me, Elmer Fudd is going on the front page of the Torch."

Clark rolled his eyes, "Like I haven't heard that threat a million times before." _And the Torch doesn't get around nearly as much as the Daily Planet._

"What? I've never said that before..."

He froze, "Look, Lois-"

"Smallville! Watch out! There's a guy in the road!"

His eyes shot forward, and he saw a man standing in the road with what could only be called questionable fashion choices. Slamming his foot so hard on the break that he nearly put the pedal through the floor of the truck, they screeched to a halt mere inches from the man.

"If the two of you wouldn't mind removing yourselves from the vehicle, I'd love to have a chat with you," the man chimed, pulling a gun out from behind his back.

Slowly, they got out of the truck and walked around to the front. "Look guy, I don't know what the hell your problem is-"

"My problem?" he asked. "Oh, I'm looking at my problem right now, Ms. Lane."

Lois frowned, "How do you know my name?"

"I know everything there is to know about you, Ms. Lane. Now, if it's not much trouble, would you follow me?" he asked. Waving his gun at a nearby farm.

Clark swallowed. He knew that this must be Tempus. But he couldn't risk letting Lois see him use his powers. He'd have to play along for now. They followed Tempus across the field towards the barn. Lois whispered to Clark, "Don't worry, I'll get us out of this, Smallville."

"I'm afraid there will be no getting out of this, Deary," chimed Tempus. "I know all your tricks. I've planned this to _perfection_."

He led them into the barn, and motioned for them to stand before him. He tilted his head as he eyed his prey. "I suppose that the two of you don't even know what this is all about, do you? It really is tragic that you'll never get to live up to the names I so loathe you for."

Clark frowned for a second, which caught Tempus' attention.

"I see that Superman doesn't even bother to use glasses in this era, or do you not go by that name yet?"

A moment of realization dawned for Clark as he looked away for a second, '_He doesn't realize that I'm not the Clark from 2005..._'

"I don't know what a _super-man_ is, but you've clearly got the wrong people," started Lois. "Smallville doesn't wear glasses, and we're sure as hell not a couple. And if you don't let us go, you're going to be in a world of hurt, pal."

Tempus smirked, "You don't know what a Superman is, Deary?" He took her silence as a _no_. "I'll show you what a Superman is. He's the kind of person that can get hurt by a little green rock from outer-space."

Before Clark could react, probably because of the object in his hand, Tempus knocked Clark out cold with a fistful of Kryptonite.

"Smallville!"

Tempus waved the gun at her, "I'm afraid your weapon-of-choice will be a little less special. Now tie him up."

"You son of a-"

"Now, now, there's no need for that."

Lois snarled as she pulled Clark up to the post, "For a man that wants to kill us, you've got a twisted sense of manners."

Tempus started to circle them as Lois tie him up with the rope that was laying on the ground. "I've thought long and hard about how to do this. How to kill you two. And I have to tell you, it's going _splendidly_."

"And why exactly is it that you want to kill us?" she asked as she finished tying the knot.

"Because you two will make the world so... _happy_. The future... it's unbearable! You have to be stopped, Ms. Lane."

Lois shook her head, "You think you're from the future?"

"I am from the future. And I know all about you, and him, I know about your daughter Jo'an for goodness sake!"

"My _daughter_? With _Smallville_? Now I _know_ you're crazy."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I love getting to write younger Clois, even though only one of them was from that younger Clois pairing, haha. Anyways, I won't babble on too much, because I'm posting another chapter with this to help make up for the long delay in this chapter!

But still shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** _Steve Trevor_.


	229. Steve Trevor

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** allusions to Steve/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #229, Steve Trevor

**Author's Note: **I was watching the Wonder Woman animated movie last night, which is awesome btw, and wanted to write this! Enjoy!

* * *

"Colonel Steven Trevor."

He nodded, "Present, sir."

"You have been brought before this committee because you were recently engaged by a hostile nation-"

"I'm not sure hostile is the word." The glare that he was met with told him that none of his usual Air Force back talk was going to fly in front of this guy. And for Diana's sake, maybe now wasn't the time. "General Lane, sir."

General Sam Lane stared him down, "Tell us your account of what happened, Colonel."

Steve nodded. "I was engaging with enemy pilots, kicking ass if I might add," Lane glared again. "I mean, proving proficient aerial-battle tactics, when a hunk of one of my many defeated foes' bird took out my starboard engine. I would have been a sitting duck if I ejected, so I was intending to try and put her in the water, maybe Aquaman would save me or something."

"And that's when the Island appeared?"

"Indeed, sir."

Lane frowned, "You didn't see it before then?"

"No, sir. All I could see was the deep blue and in the blink of an eye, there was a whole lotta green."

"How did they do it? What technology were they using? Do they have an alliance with someone? Are they working with the North Koreans? The Russians?" demanded Lane. "What did they tell you?"

Steve scratched the back of his neck, "You're not going to like it, sir."

Lane's frown deepened. As if that was possible. "Tell me, Colonel."

"They said the _Gods_ hid it."

"God hid it?"

Shaking his head, "No, sir. Not God. The Gods. As in more than one. As in Zeus, and Ares, and Hermes and such. They said that the Island was under the protection of the Greek Gods, until that day anyways."

"Do you honestly expect me to believe that, Trevor?"

"I most surely do not, sir. I didn't expect you to believe it. Hell, I don't even know if I believe it, and you have no idea what I have seen in the last couple weeks. I'm just telling you what they told me, and I don't rightly have another explanation."

Lane eyed him carefully, "And what exactly did you see over there, Colonel Trevor?"

"Let just say that Superman, and Batman, and all these other costume wearing heroes are just the tip of the iceberg. You think their stuff is unbelievable, the Amazons are a whole other ball game. I'm talking monsters, and magic, and stuff of legend. I can't explain it, but they're real players."

"Are you saying they are a threat?"

Steve chuckled to himself, "No. Not unless you poke 'em. I'll tell you right now, if you try and go over there and boss them around, you better bring Superman and his super-friends with you. That's not an island of little girls, General. They are warriors. And they won't put up with your macho crap. I don't think even all the costumed friends on your speed dial could take 'em. They're nothing like anything you've ever seen."

General Lane sighed, "And the girl?"

"Diana?" He received a nod. "She's the strongest of them all. She's the Queen's daughter, but she's no damsel princess. The things that I have seen her do, I can honestly say that she is the most incredible thing I have ever seen. She is a _wonderous woman_."

"How dangerous is she?"

Steve shook his head for a moment, "I think she'd kick Superman's ass down the block, if that's what you're asking."

"Colonel, you seem to be talking up the Amazons quite a bit, is there something that we should know? Are you emotionally compromised? Is there another reason why you have praised them so?" asked one of the other committee members.

"I'm praising them because it's fact. I saw the Amazons take on a man that claimed to be Ares, and I'm damn well likely to believe him. He had an army of zombie warriors, dragons, and beasts you've only ever seen in Disney movies. I'm trying to stress how important it is that you treat them with respect, because you do not want to make them your enemy," explained Steve. "The Amazons could be our greatest ally."

The committee member smirked, "I believe you misunderstood the question, Colonel. I'm asking about your relationship with Diana of Themyscira."

"Who the hell do you think you are asking me a question like that?" asked Steve. "I'm here to talk about the Amazons, not my personal life."

Standing, the committee member looked down on Steve from the bench. "I'm asking because you might care more about the safety of the Amazons and your girlfriend than telling us all the facts. What you're describing sounds like some Lord of the Rings movie. Naturally, I have to question whether you are simply laying it on thick so that we are forced into bowing down before these Amazons instead of blowing them out of the water before they can attack us first."

Steve glared up at the man, knowing his face but not quite placing it, "That would be a very bad idea. You _will _lose that war."

"I'm sorry, Colonel Trevor, but the United States of America does not lose. Not when they have Lex Luthor on their side."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I love me some Wonder Woman, and I thought the Wonder Woman animated movie might be the best possible introduction story I could think of for the character. I think they'd be very smart to use it as the basis for her own live-action movie. Tried to show Steve Trevor in a more connected and influential way here, kind of like he has been in the New 52, where he is essentially the DC version of Nick Fury.

Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought about the last two chapters with some reviews!

**Next Up:** _Tempus, Part 3_.


	230. Tempus, Part 3

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - Those broken glasses have a role to play still to come, haha. I really want to integrate Lex Luthor's relationship with the government as he was in the comics now that he can at least use his brain wipe as an _excuse_ for people non-Superman related. I loved the Wonder Woman movie, and the script should really be the starting point for a live action movie. I too am loving Steve Trevor in the DCnU, and I'm excited for him to lead the JLA in february.

_**whynot1993**_ - We're going to see Steve Trevor is much more than some guy who happened to crash on Paradise Island, and I think that he will be a strong ally to the League going forward, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I just love writing Lois Lane, haha. And lets just go ahead and say, the Tempus story puts Lois Lane front and center in this story. It really is _her_ story. I know it's been a while since we saw Jo'an, but I promise, she is coming in the near future! I've just been caught up with some of these more grander arcs.

You know Lex, he'll try to make people see things his way to get what he wants, haha. Steve is definitely a romantic interest for Wonder Woman most of the time, though he was a bit older than her in some versions of the story and that was taken out of the story. He'll definitely be someone that will want to compete with Batman in my story, haha. And nope, no x-mas shopping on the 24th this year, I'm almost done with it already! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - *gives the look* I think you read it before too, I can't remember how much of it though, haha. Quack, Quack, hahaha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - He's one of my favorite "adjustments" to the DCnU, so I was happy to include him in this one. He will play a big role in an arc that I'm planning, so I would expect to see a lot more of Steve!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked them!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #230, Tempus, Part 3

**Author's Note:** And now, the Lois Lane portion of the story! Enjoy!

* * *

"You know, if you're not careful, you're going to end up looking like Lex Luthor, Lois," laughed a voice from behind her.

Lois ripped around, "What the hell did you- Mr. K! I'm so sorry! I thought you were Smallville..."

Her eyes bugged out as she turned away from the kitchen again, '_Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. I just time-traveled into the Kents' kitchen, and now I've just ran into Mr. Kent. What the hell am I supposed to do now? Where is Clark?!_'

Jonathan leaned out of the fridge with the pitcher of orange juice in his hand, "It's fine, Lois. I just worry about your hair."

"My hair?"

He started to pour his glass, "Can't it ruin your hair to dye it like that?"

She tilted her head in confusion for a second, "Oh! Right, because I was blonde back then."

"Back then?"

"Uh, I meant, back then, when you saw me last. I had blonde hair. Because it was back then. When you saw me last."

Jonathan gave her the crooked smile he generally saved for Clark when he beat around the bush about how he almost exposed his powers to someone each week, "You know, Lois, you might want to cut back on the coffee."

She muttered under her breath as he leaned back into the refrigerator to put the orange juice back, "I'm gunna need something a lot stronger than _coffee_ to get me through this day..."

'_How the hell did I end up someplace different than Smallville?! We weren't even in the house, we were in the barn! Crap, I've got to find Clark, but I can't just ditch Mr. K, I can't be all suspicious, Clark's gunna kill me..._' she grumbled to herself.

"Anyways... I uh... I need to go run an errand," Lois offered awkwardly. "So, I'm uh... I'm just going to... go."

Jonathan gave her another funny look, "Are you sure you're ok, Lois?"

"Uhuh," she mumbled as she made her way for the door, only to find someone standing in the door way. "Sheriff Adams?"

Nodding, Sheriff Adams took off her hat and walked into the house, "Ms. Lane, Mr. Kent."

"Hello there, Sheriff, what brings you all the way out here?"

"Well, Mr. Kent, we found your truck pulled over on the side of the road a few miles down, and we couldn't reach either you or your wife, so I figured I should come by and make sure everything was ok," she explained.

Jonathan frowned, "Martha is in Metropolis, and I've been on the back nine all day. Clark must have taken it to school."

"I figured as much," she nodded. "But I found a pair of broken glasses under the driver side, and I wanted to make sure that it wasn't something else. Being Smallville and all. I don't recall young Mr. Kent having a need for glasses though."

Lois froze as Jonathan shook his head, "No, Clark's never had a need for them."

'_Glasses? They must be Clark's, my Clark... Why would he pull over on the side of the road? Why would he take the truck in the first place, it drives him crazy when he has to drive..._' she wondered.

"Well, it's off the road enough that it's out of the way, so I can't really assume the worst, but I'd appreciate if it was gone by the time I get off duty," added the Sheriff as she turned on her heel before stopping to add a final note. "And, if you wouldn't mind, let me know if there isn't something else I need to be aware of."

He nodded, "Of course, Sheriff."

Lois was still off in her world of thought. '_If Smallville took the truck, maybe someone was with him, someone that he was scared to show his powers to... If he ended up at the farm, it wouldn't have been his parents, maybe Chloe? But didn't Chloe know back then? Maybe it was me! But then why did they pull over? He better not have put the moves on past-Lois and gone for a roll in the hay, that's my move... What if... Oh crap, what if Tempus found them? He knows Clark's weakness!_'

"That's unusual of Clark to just leave the truck on the side of the road..." pondered Jonathan.

She turned to Mr. Kent. '_I have to tell him... I'm going to need back-up, and I can't risk going and finding now-Clark and change things... But I can't tell Mr. Kent, because that might change things..._'

"Mr. K... I need to ask you something... crazy."

Jonathan raised his eyebrows, "Alright..."

"If someone you loved was in danger, and you needed help, but asking for help might be even more dangerous, would you still ask for it?" she asked. "Would you risk potentially everything to save that person?"

He eyed her for a second, "Lois, when it comes to the people I _love_, I'm willing to risk it _all_."

Lois swallowed, "Well then I have something _really_ earth shattering to tell you."

Jonathan look at her intently, wondering what would make Lois so nervous. She stood there, brow furrowed and mashing her hands together, trying to figure out just how she was going to explain the insanity of her situation.

"So... I've been sleeping with your son for the last ten years or so..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I'm going to keep it short and sweet, I've gotta run, it's new comic book day! Yay! But I hope you guys liked it and can't wait to hear what you think! Especially with that little cliff hanger, muahaha. Shoot me some reviews and let me know if you want more or if I should stop there! hahaha. Can you just imagine the wicked smile plastered on my face with that one? haha. See you guys soon!

**Next Up:** _Tempus, Part 4_.


	231. Tempus, Part 4

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - You definitely read my mind! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Yeah, it's definitely just one of those things I could imagine Lois blurting out, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - She's not always as graceful as Clark thinks she is, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - *rolls eyes playfully*

_**Crafygirl11**_ - I'm glad that you're caught up! I know there were a lot of chapters to go through! I'm definitely going to have Carter and Ollie cross paths again, it's just too much fun to not to write those two together!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I thought about having her say something logical, but instead, I wanted to have her say something that was just... _Lois_, haha. Oh no, there can't be any heart attacks! Never! haha. You will find out where Clark and Past Lois ended up in Part 5, but now Lois has to get her wingman to help her go save her man! On the comics front, there has actually been a lot of Clois action going on, admittedly a lot of Clark jealous of Lois and her new guy, but also some jealous Lois because she has noticed something is up and she figures it's a girl (which it is, he has been smiling about his kiss with WW), but then she accidentally assumes that Kara is his new girlfriend, whom she thinks is some cosplay actress, hahaha.

Either way, I have a good feeling about the future of Clois in the New 52.

_**cherylnixon**_ - I have thought about them quite a bit! I just haven't found a spot to fit them in quite yet! I do have an idea that was going to become it's own story, but instead I might work it into this one!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Kents

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #231, Tempus, Part 4

**Author's Note: **I know you're all dying to know what happens next, so here you go! Enjoy!

* * *

"Excuse me?" asked a shocked Jonathan Kent.

Lois threw her hands in the air, "It's not like we aren't married! I mean, sure, we didn't exactly wait until the wedding night, but your son is a very busy man and it was hard to get him to stand in one place long enough to tie the knot."

"But you had time to do that?" he laughed. He was certain that Lois had lost her mind now.

She paused for a second before giving him a quick head tilt, "_Touché_."

Jonathan shook his head, "I really think you should lay down, Lois. You're not making a lot of sense right now, you've only known Clark for a year or so, there's no way that you could-"

"No, I'm not crazy, Mr. Kent. I know what I'm saying _sounds_ crazy, but it's the truth. I'm not the Lois that you know, I'm from the _future_, and I know the idea of me marrying Smallville sounds crazy, but what can I say? He grew on me," she snickered in the back of her head, '_Like a fungus..._' before he snapped her back to reality.

"Did you bump your head? Did you stumble across a meteor rock?"

Lois rolled her eyes, "You mean _kryptonite_? I hate when people say meteor rock." Jonathan's shock over the correct word let her knew that he was starting to believe. "Yes, I know that your son is from _Krypton_. I know that you found his _ship_, and I'm glad because you raised him to be the man that I love. He's the _father_ of my _daughter_. And now there's a guy who has come back to the past to try and kill him, and I need _your_ help to save him... I think this Tempus clown has my husband..."

Jonathan was too hung up on something else to worry about Tempus. "I have a _granddaughter_?"

She nodded, "She's a little monster. She like to breaks stuff and steals my _freakin'_ cup all the time."

He smiled for a second before waving his arms again, "Lois, this is crazy-"

"Are you seriously going to make me do this? Are you going to make me prove it? I'm going to _scar_ you for life, do you really want _that_?" she warned him. "Really? Ok then, but remember, you made me do this. Smallville has a birthmark on his left butt cheek. Are you happy? Are you glad that you made me tell you that, Mr. Kent? I can't believe I just told you that..."

He gave her an amused look, "You found him _naked_ over a year and a half ago, Lois."

She paused for a second, "Fair enough." Then she had another idea. "But talk your way out of this one!" she smirked. He gave her a '_go ahead_' look. "When me and Mrs. K were moving Jo'an's crib into the attic, I found your uh, ..._special_... box? The one with the little toy pistols and the cowboy hat? Mrs. K had an indian princess tiara, and when little Clarkie was sleeping, the _cowboy_ would save the _indian princess_ in the loft? And they'd-"

Jonathan shouted in shock, "How do you know about that?! Martha would _never_ tell you that!"

"She would if she caught me and Smallville about half a million times in all kinds of embarrassing costumes and blue-k handcuffs!" she shouted back. "That's the kind of thing a mother-in-law tells to make her dauther-in-law feel less _mortified_!"

He stared at her, '_Was Lois from the future? She did look older, I guess... And there's no way that Clark would tell her about Krypton or that Martha would tell her about the Pocahontas game... Stranger things have happened on this old farm... But the fact that Clark married Lois in the future? He would have figured she'd be more likely to kill-_'

"I believe you."

Snapping Lois out of thoughts on how else to mortify Jonathan and prove her future-ness, "You do?"

"It's a long story," he smiled, "But I know about _stubborn_ _women_ and _Kent_ _men_. Trust me."

Lois smirked, "You know, your wife says it the _other_ way around."

Jonathan gave her a narrow eyed look, "Don't we have a bad guy to stop?"

"You sound just like _Smallville_, you know that?"

He walked towards the cupboard under the stairs, reached up and snagged his shotgun from over the door. "If this Tempus fella is really here to kill my son, I think we could both stand to be a bit more like _Clark_ right now, don't you?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I know it was a little bit shorter than normal, but it was part of Part 3, and just felt way too long, so I broke them into two parts. Anyways, make sure to let me know what you thought with some reviews! You know how they make me post faster when I hear back from you guys!

The next part will be a sort of conclusion, but there will be an epilogue and what not, so have no fear!

**Next Up:** _Tempus, Part 5_.


	232. Tempus, Part 5

**Review Comments:**

_**Lilbit4**_ - They're always a blast to write together!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I don't think Martha ever thought that Lois would have the chance to mention it to Jonathan, hahaha. But I'm glad that you liked it! And I hope you like the finale! It's been a blast to write!

_**cherylnixon**_ - That's just how Lois tends to do things, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was fun to write future-Lois and Jonathan together, and I'm really looking forward to getting to do that in my Flashpoint story, it was one of the big pushes to do it!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I haven't put ink-to-paper quite yet on the next Ollie/Carter chapter, but with the coming events, I think it'll be sooner rather than later, because the team will come together as Clark will need them now more than ever before.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I'm sorry! haha. It's out now! If that makes it better? haha. Oh, and if you wanna keep an easier tab on the Smallville: Season 11 paper-copies, I'd download the Pull-List app from Comixology? It's how I keep track of all of my comics, otherwise I'd be running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I'm reading well over 50 titles a month now, it just keeps getting longer and longer, but they're all so good!

Well, for what it's worth, there's going to be a change on writers on _Action Comics_, and Andy Diggle would like to bring back Clois and I know that Scott Snyder's new _Man of Steel_ book will have tons of Lois, so I feel like the Clois train is heading back on track, but I won't make any promises. I have a good feeling about the future.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, and I won't make you wait any longer!

_**sasslady**_ - She's just a bundle of fun, isn't she? haha. And when I started brain-storming ideas for how to convince Jonathan that Lois was from the future, I just couldn't let that one go, haha. Luckily, the universe won't explode, but I honestly don't know where past-Clark is running around, haha. I never gave him much thought, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - I'm starting, Lady. And to think past-Lois was freaking out Clark wasn't comparing her to fungus, haha. How else would you have convinced Jonathan that Lois was from the future, eh? eh, eh?!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #232, Tempus, Part 5

**Author's Note:** This is the kinda-sorta finale, there will be an epilogue though!

* * *

"What I don't understand, is if you're from the _future_, and you _time-traveled_ here, and Smallville is some big _superhero_ you want to kill so bad, why didn't you go back and kill him as a _baby_ or something? Why now?"

Tempus laughed crazily, "Because! I need to kill both of you! There isn't _one_, or the _other_. It's always the _two_ of you! I can't know if it's his _powers_, or your _influence_! I can't know if I kill just one, if the other will still bring Utopia! I needed you too!"

Lois ripped against her ropes, trying to break them, "Then why not kill him as a baby, and then find me and kill me?"

"Because I didn't have _time_ to look through the archives, I didn't have _time_ to see where you were born! I didn't have time to see where you might _be_! The irony isn't lost on me, Deary. So I went with the one place I knew you'd both be! _Smallville_. The only word I have had to hear more than the four words that have driven me to this! _Lois_. _Lane_. _Clark_. _Kent_," he ranted like a maniac.

"Look, I don't know what future you think we're going to have, but you're _way_ off base on this one!"

He leaned down and got in her face, "You two will _ruin_ the future. And I'm going to stop you."

Grabbing her shoulders, he jerked her forward and then back to smack her head against the wood post. She slumped over as she drifted unconscious. Tempus stood up and stared at his captives.

"It had to end this way, Ms. Lane. In a world without _Superman_, in a world without _Lois Lane_..." he ranted, cocking his gun. "There'll be no Utopia. No _peace_. Just sex, violence, and _me_." He aimed to shoot.

_**BANG!**_

"Put the gun down, you sick pervert."

Tempus turned, holding his bleeding hand, to see Jonathan Kent holding a rifle and an enraged Lois Lane.

"Ah, I recognize you. Jonathan Kent. _Superman's Superman_. What a dreary children's story that made," groaned Tempus. "I assume it's heroic gestures like this one that earned you that narcissistic title?"

Lois snarled, "Officially crossed the line, Doc Brown!"

She advanced on him, delivering a right cross to the jaw. "That's for the _kryptonite_." A blow to his gut toppled him over. "That's for giving _that_ future-famous reporter a serious migraine when she wakes up" He looked up with a pain look, but it was nothing compared to how it looked after the the kick to his groin. "And that's for talking smack about my _Dad_."

Tempus fell to the ground with a thud. He was out for the count.

Lois turned and looked back at Mr. K, whom was shocked. "_What_? Your son isn't the only one who packs a _wallop_."

Jonathan quickly rushed to Clark and threw the kryptonite away, and he started to wake. As his vision started to clear, he tried to shake the dizziness from his head. "Is Lois... Is Lois ok? Did he hurt her? Did he... Dad?"

"It's me, Clark. Are you ok? Can you stand?"

He nodded, climbing to his feet. He brushed himself off, he saw Lois standing next to, well, _Lois_. "I take it, you _know_?"

Jonathan nodded, "I know. Still working on _believing_, but I know, Son."

Lois began to stir from her slumber, and Jonathan exchanged a nervous look with Clark. Before they could even look back, they heard a hollow _clunk. _When they turned, they saw Lois, olde- uh, more mature Lois standing over, uh, less mature Lois with a stick.

"What? She would have been a stubborn bitch if she had woken up."

Jonathan looked at Clark, whom was shaking his head quickly, "I heard _nothing_."

Knowing that he couldn't leave this Lois knowing what Tempus had told her, no matter if she believed it or not, Clark flew to find his old friend from Mars to help them with that nifty mind-wipe trick of his. Once they were done with Lois, Clark turned to his father. He knew that no matter how much he wanted Jonathan to know the man he had become, this had to be done.

"My friend J'onn is going to help you _forget_," he told him with a heavy heart.

Jonathan frowned, "Do I _need_ to?"

Clark nodded, "I'm going to need you to." Jonathan nodded. He understood. "My trials are what make me become the man that I need to become. _All_ of them. I can't become that man if you're different for having known what you know now."

"There isn't _anything_ I wouldn't do for you, Son. I'm very proud of the man you seem to have become."

He knew that if he spoke, he wouldn't be able to keep it together, so he just smiled and nodded.

Lois stepped forward, hugging the man that could barely believe she was his daughter-in-law. "I'm glad that we finally got to have an adventure together, Mr. K. Looks like being a _hero_ runs in the family."

He planted a kiss on her cheek, "I'm glad to see you're part of that _family_."

It made Lois warm in her chest to know that he _knew_. Even if it was just for a couple of hours, it meant the world to her that he _knew_, and that he _approved_. She stepped aside for father and son to say their goodbyes.

Clark felt his breath catch in his throat, "It was really great to see you..."

Jonathan noticed the tears building up in his son's eyes. It was breaking his heart to see Clark like this, and the only thing he could figure was making him feeling this way was... "I'm not in the future you're going back to, am I, Son?"

His silence held heavy, and Lois burrowed her face into Clark's arm. Trying to hide her own tears from her father-in-law.

Clark reached his arm out to Jonathan, grabbing his shoulder as Jonathan had grabbed his so many times before. With pain in his eyes, a smile forced it's way onto his face. He squeezed firmly. "You'll always be there, Dad. _Always_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I didn't feel like waiting a few more days to post, haha. Hope you guys don't mind too terribly much, haha. Well, there you have it. Tempus in Smallville, did I do it justice? haha. I really didn't realize how little Tempus actually was in this story, but I'll tell you what, I doubt it's the last we'll see of him.

There will be an epilogue next, and then I think we'll dive into our next big arc, though there might be a stand alone chapter or two before I do that. For now, I just want to hear what you guys thought!

**Next Up:** _Tempus, Epilogue_.


	233. Tempus, Epilogue

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was a lot of fun to write, especially Lois and Jonathan together. The whole, "she'd have been a stubborn bitch if she'd woken up" thing was kind of a in-the-moment idea as I was writing, and I just went with it, haha. I didn't want J'onn to have to mind wipe _everyone_, I already had to do it with Jonathan, and it seemed like the kind of thing that Lois would have said in the moment.

_**whynot1993**_ - I wanted it to have a heart felt moment at the end, and it really carries over into this epilogue. Lois is a ton of fun to write, she is so fiery, I really enjoyed getting to write her own adventure.

_**cherylnixon**_ - It just seemed like the kind of thing Lois would say, haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And I don't know how much of it has to do with me, these characters are so great that they practically write themselves! I'm glad that you're enjoying the story though!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Lois deserved some butt-kicking screen time, don't you think? haha. Clark can't have all the fun! It wasn't in the early plans to have Jonathan team-up with Lois and set-up a big send off with the trio, but I'm glad that it worked out the way that it did. It was really fun to write, and I liked the heartfelt moment between Jonathan and Clark.

That app has saved my life on more than one occasion, haha. Yup, almost exclusively DC titles, though I throw in some Spider-Man, Deadpool, and Captain Marvel, haha. There are just so many books right now, I keep trying to cut down my list and it just keeps growing. Unfortunately/luckily, some of my books are being consolidated into more group-ish books, so it'll be a little less expensive. Well, a lot of the books I read are intertwined with each other, like the Green Lantern books or the Batman books. Right now there is a big crossover between Superman, Supergirl, and Superboy. That helps.

I don't think I've read any of Andy Diggle's writing before, but his interviews make me really optimistic. And Scott Snyder is a writing genius, and I follow him on Twitter and he just keeps raving about how much he loves writing Lois, so I have a good feeling for Superman's big 75's anniversary in 2013. It's going to be awesome!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm a little surprised that he never did appear, they certainly showed some love to the Lois & Clark show by having both Dean Cain and Teri Hatcher on the show, and he was a really popular character. I'm glad you liked it!

_**cathy03**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was a lot of fun to write! Steve Trevor was great as well, and threads of what we saw in that chapter will probably end up in my _Flashpoint_ story as characters start to pop-up. I love Wonder Woman. She is an awesome character, especially when she's written the right way. I'm digging her solo book a lot, which is quite different from her appearances in other titles. She's tons of fun. Oh, you have to watch the Elite! It's so good! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #233, Tempus, the Epilogue

**Author's Note:** See if you can catch a tie-in to one of my other favorite tv shows in this one! Enjoy!

* * *

"You look like something out of a _Lady Gaga_ music video, you know that?"

Tempus shot her a sour look, "What?"

"I don't even _care_ if you don't get it," she smirked. "That one was for _me_."

He twisted his face in anger, "Is that supposed to be the Lois Lane _wit_ that I was promised?"

Lois shook her head, "No. You don't deserve my wit. But I'll tell you what you _do_ deserve. You put my husband through hell today, and broke his heart all over again. For that? I think you deserve a _special_ hell. That's why I called up my boy here."

From the around the corner, a tall man with an orange scale suit walked over. "Hola."

"Spending enough time around Bart?" she muttered before turning back to Tempus. "You see, this fella here is _Aquaman_. And when I went to interview this wack-job named Cooper-something-other at Cal-Tech last year, I met this cute little Indian guy named Raj and a pervy little pipsqueak named Howard. And Raj wanted to know if I knew Gillboy over here."

AC scowled, "I don't have _gills_."

"Anyways, Raj wanted to know how the _bathrooms_ in Atlantis worked. And Aquaman has informed me there are _tanks_ for that sort of thing, but none of the Atlanteans ever likes having the job of _cleaning_ those tanks," Lois smirked.

Tempus had a moment of realization of horror, "No..."

She held up a scuba mask, "I believe that Aquaman will have an air-tank waiting for you when you get to the coast."

"This is _inhuman_! You can't do this to me! I have _rights_!" shouted Tempus.

Lois shrugged, "I voted for the Phantom Zone, but we decided with your _fashion choices_, you wouldn't last long."

With the snap of her fingers, AC grabbed the back of Tempus' jacket and dragged him out of the Kent Barn. She made her way back towards the house when she saw her husband sitting on the porch swing. Clark looked deep in thought, rocking in a slow rthym. Shelby curled up next to Clark's leg, Lois leaned down and scratched his ear before sitting down beside Clark.

"I dealt with our time-traveling cross dresser," she offered.

He smiled a small smile, "You know, between your war on the fashion of the 31st century and my collection of plaid, you might end up finding yourself without many clothing options, Lois."

Lois smirked up at him, "I doubt I'd hear any complaints from you if I found myself without clothes, Smallville."

The smile remained, but there was a hint of sadness in it. And the way that he avoided her gaze, she knew that he was trying not to let her see it in his eyes. She'd see it then, because she could see right down to his soul like that.

She reached up and grazed her fingers against the hair on the back of his neck. "I know this was hard on you."

Clark swallowed, "I didn't expect to run into _him_."

"I know."

He sighed, "And it wasn't like when I saw his _ghost_, or some imagined version of him... He was _real_. He was right in front of me, and he was real. It was just like when I saw him on Earth-2. Except this time _I_ made myself leave him."

Lois nodded, staying silent for a moment. "Have you ever thought about going back there? To Earth-2? To _see_ him?"

Clark paused for a second. "I have."

"And?"

"And it's not actually _him_. It's not actually my father. Just like _Ultraman_ isn't actually _me_."

She nodded, "But part of him is. Until that meteor shower changed things, until Lionel found _that_ Clark instead of your folks, it was him. I know it's not the same, I know it's not even close to the same, but it's _something_."

"Is it wrong that part of me _wants_ to?"

Lois shook her head, "I believe that Earth needs you, Clark... All of the Earths. I knew your dad. He needed you just as much as you needed him. He loved you so much. Maybe _that_ Jonathan needs you too. There's _nothing_ wrong with that."

He turned to look her in the eye. "You really think that?"

"I do," she smiled. "I think that if I lost you... I'd look for you, any _part_ of you, that I could find. I think that's why I saved Conner from Cadmus Labs. I thought I had lost you, and if there was _any_ part of you inside of him, I wanted him around."

Clark leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on her lips. "If I went... just to _visit_... would you come with me?"

"Always, Smallville," she nodded through teary eyes. "I'd do _anything_ for you."

They stayed there on the porch swing for a long time. Sooner or later, Jo'an would come out and ask what was for dinner. She would be oblivious to the fact that they had just traveled across time and back. To her, they went and talked to the Rokk guy in the barn and then her dad had slunk out to the porch swing twenty minutes later.

Little did she know, one adventure had just been had. But an adventure to Earth-2, was about to begin.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. Was it a satisfying Tempus tale? haha. Are we excited about the possibility of Lois and Clark traveling to Earth-2? Make sure you let me know in the reviews, people! I'm on vacation, so this will have to be short and sweet, but I'm glad that I got to share my Tempus story with you! Let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure, there is a big arc on the horizon, actually _two_ big arcs. But I might try and slip in some stand-alone chapters before we dive into those, then again, I'm excited about the arcs, haha. We'll have to wait and see!


	234. A Promise

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - The story I have in mind for Earth-2 will definitely have it's fun moments.

_**cherylnixon**_ - I couldn't send him back to the future without facing the Lois Lane wrath, haha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - There wasn't really a plan to have Clark and Jonathan cross paths, but in the last minute, I decided to go for it and I thought, "_think about the impact Earth-2 Jonathan had on him, imagine seeing his real dad again, in the flesh, what would that be like for Clark?_" and it became that. I liked how it turned out and that Lois was there for him.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Well, it'll be a continuation of what we've seen of him so far in this story, and I'll give you the little tease of what _might_ be coming, haha. Clark Luthor met two new people in chapter 161 that might factor in, muahaha. Well, one arc is about Earth-2, and one arc is about event I've been setting up for quite some time, haha. It's pretty ambitious, but I think it's the kind of story that you guys have been waiting to read!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was a lot of fun to write! One of the things I'm looking forward to writing with Earth-2 is the mirror factor for a lot of the characters, as well as seeing who is Chloe on Earth-2? What happened with the Kents at the end of Kent and after what I wrote? It's going to be fun. Hope you're having a wonderful holiday too!

_**dessie77**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**sasslady**_ - Lois is just one of those characters that awesomes all over the place, haha. I wanted to give her a great scene to kind of cap off things with Tempus, and I was pretty happy with it. I will just say this about Tempus: We haven't seen the last of him. He's tons of fun to write and I had about a million different ideas on what to do with him, this just happened to be the one that I ended up fleshing out the most. Tempus is too much fun to use just once.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing: **None that really matter.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #234, a Promise

**Author's Note: **It's kind of short, but hopefully it's short and _sweet_, albeit kind of sad at the same time. Enjoy!

* * *

He was broken.

The others had run for help, but they both knew that it was much too late for that. They both knew that as the moments trickled away from them, this was a time for goodbyes. And these two had come too _damn_ far not to have their final words. Both of them had wondered how this would go. Whom would lay before the other, broken and hanging on for _this_.

_This_ _moment_.

It was funny, even in such a tragic moment. Deep down, they'd always suspected that they might be the death of each other. That one would kill the other. In the end, it couldn't have been a more poetic ending. One slouched against the rubble, the other kneeled beside, a tight grip on his hand to let him know he was here. Like he always had been.

"I bet you're pretty pleased with yourself," he grunted. Even now, he had to be the funny one.

A small smile sneaked across saddened features. "I have to admit that I am."

He supposed his humor had rubbed off on him after all these years. "I bet you didn't think it would end like _this_... I know I didn't..."

"I had hoped it would..."

"What will you tell them? Everyone?"

A slight confusion was evident across his features, as if there was any other thing to tell. "The _truth_."

"No one will believe it. You know that, don't you?" he groaned in pain. "They won't believe it. No matter how _she_ writes it..."

Determination set into his eyes. "The world will know that you died a hero."

"I was doing what I _had_ to do to protect my planet."

He shook his head, "That's all a hero _can_ do."

"You never did give up hope, did you? You always believed in me," he let a few tears slip away. "After everything that I've done. All that I have done to you, to your friends, you believed in me. Why? After all that's happened... Why?"

He squeezed his hand. "I made a promise to a little boy. I saw him once, after I thought he was gone. And I never forgot it. I never forgot that even in the darkest places, there is light. And I promised him I'd always keep an eye out for him."

"Is that what you've been doing? I feel violated that you've been watching me like that," he groaned in pain.

Shaking his head, knowing that it wouldn't be _him_ if he didn't make a joke on his death bed, he continued," I promised him I'd _never_ give up on him, and I never have. I've seen him a few times over these years, and I saw him again today."

A twinge of pain shot through him, but it couldn't wipe away his smile. "There's nothing lost that can't be found?"

"If I can find him after all this time, I'm a believer."

They shared a moment of silence for a while. There was so much that needed to be said, but at the same time, there _wasn't_. For two men who had infinitely found themselves on opposite sides, they knew each other as well as anyone ever could.

"I'm sorry about Lana."

He shook his head, "I'm sorry I didn't trust you."

"You were right not to," he admitted. "It had to be that way... I still think you're _naive_," he smirked.

A low chuckle trickled out of his mouth as he shook his head, "And I still think you're still a _pessimist_."

As his eyes began to droop, they both knew that there wasn't much time left. He'd stay with him until he was gone, his hand gripping his tightly. He didn't want to let him go, but even _he_ didn't have the strength to keep him here when the time came. His eyes lids grew heavy with each passing second, and he knew that there was really only one thing left to say.

"I'm glad that in the end, I didn't end up killing you, Clark..."

"I'm glad that in the end, we ended up being heroes together, Lex..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? My version of '_the Death of Lex Luthor._' This is way off in the future, like, when Lex is in his sixties or something. I just got this idea a while back and ran with it and it turned into this. Every once in a while I think about how this story is going to end, and I already know what the last chapter will be, but there are so many characters that have to be spoken for. Lex is definitely one of them, and I thought this would be an interesting way for him to go out. Anyways, make sure you let me know what you thought! Shoot me some reviews!

And of course, I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season, whatever holiday(s) it is that you celebrate!

**Next Up:** I believe it will be _Sidekick_.


	235. Black-K, Part 2

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you liked it, I was trying to show how deep and conflicted that relationship has been while also remembering that at their most basic of levels, it was a relationship that began as friends.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It was his "Death" chapter, haha. And don't worry, it was when Lex was nice and old, he won't be going anywhere anytime soon, haha. There will be many more Lex stories to come. That was the idea, a kind of "final word." And in the end, I like to think that their respect would rise to the top of any of the issues they had.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - No problem! You're reviewing now, and that's what matters.

_**KuroiHanabixShenny**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I never mind questions or concerns or anything like that. I love the Main Man and I'd love to get him into the story at some point, and I'm sure that I will. He's on a very long list of DCU alums that I want to have show up in this story. Starfire, as in Koriand'r? Because that's the only one that comes to mind, though she was in the Teen Titans, so that makes me think you aren't talking about Kori. Let me know and I'll answer.

If you mean like, have my Clois meet the Clois of "Lois & Clark" or the ones from the _Donnerverse_ or what not, I haven't really thought about it. I could see maybe doing something like, on a one-shot basis, but as far as in the main story, I don't know how that would look and feel. I feel like it would kind of throw things off.

_**Lilbit4**_ - I hope you had a great christmas as well.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I have no plans to end right now, it was just one of those ideas that pops in and you have to write it. I'm glad that you liked it and that it felt like the kind of thing that would happen between those two.

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! And it was a shame that it had to come down to Lana, but heartbreak is always a big blow to any friendship. I can see why they went for it, but as you'll see in Flashpoint, I'd rather see things break down because of their different views on how to save the world. Though I can't say that Lana won't be involved.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Chollie

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #235, Black-K Part 2

**Author's Note: **I believed this was going to be side-kick, but muse talked Black-K, so it's Black-K Part 2. Enjoy!

* * *

"What are we going to do?" groaned Clark. "The Black-K is missing from the fortress, I don't know how to fix this..."

Oliver scrunched his face up in thought, "I say we let them fight it out."

"What?"

"Like, whoever wins, HouseWife Lois or Seductress Lois, that's the one that gets to stay," offered Ollie. Bart nodded.

Clark frowned, "Are you suggesting I let the two halves of my wife fight to the death?"

Bart waved his arms, "Oh man, what I was imaging involved _pillows_. Who ever _killed_ someone with a _pillow_?"

Glaring at his two friends, Clark pushed the table hard enough to knock them both backwards off their chairs and knocking them onto the floor. Oliver groaned in pain, "Or we could try and find something else..."

"Why are you so _chirpy_?" asked Seductress Lois.

HouseWife Lois narrowed her eyes, "Where are your _clothes_?"

"Tell me, do the rest of the Brady Bunch know that you've run off with that sexy piece of prime-cut hunk?"

"What would your mother say about your behavoir?"

Clark stood up and walked between them, "Ladies, there's no need to fight, we're going to get this all sorted out. Now, when you were at the Fortress, do you remember touching a black rock?"

"I'll touch whatever you want me to touch, Good-Looking," grinned Seductress Lois.

HouseWife Lois gasped, "So unbecoming..."

He sighed, trying not to let his brain explode over the situation. "It would have been small, jagged edges?"

"The first thing I remember, I was at the Farm, Cuddles," shrugged HouseWife Lois.

"I was at some club in the city," nodded Seductress Lois.

Clark closed his eyes and pinched his brow. He didn't know what he was going to do, this was turning into a disaster. Lois was a hand-full on her own, two of them might very well be the death of him. "I don't know what I'm going to do."

"What is Black-K anyways?" mumbled Bart as he chowed down on some chips.

He shook his head, "It's just regular green kryptonite that's been over-" Clark's head shot up. "Just like with Lex... Bart, I need you to go to Smallville. I need you to find me some regular green kryptonite, a chunk of it."

"Isn't that kind of a bad idea?"

Ollie nodded, "I have to agree with the mouth-with-legs here, Clark. I know this is a handful, but killing yourself isn't exactly what I had in mind when I said we should find something else..."

Clark glared at him, "I'm going to make Black-K, Bow Brains."

"You know, I don't like the influence that Lois is having on you, that was mean," muttered Ollie.

Rubbing his stomach, Bart groaned, "Yeah, and I don't know if I can run, man. This amigo is full."

"Do it or I'm going to text Bruce and tell him your real name is Bartholomew," snapped Oliver.

Bart was gone in the blink of an eye, leaving Oliver to smirk smugly. "I knew that would work, Bruce is like a dog with a bone when it comes to using full names. AC wants to pull his hair out every time Bats calls him Arthur."

"Do you really think that Bruce doesn't already know his real name?" asked Clark. "I mean, it's Bruce."

Ollie grumbled, "That guy ruins everything, you know that? I don't know why we're even friends with him."

With a screech, Bart appeared on the other side of the room. "Got it."

"Good, now set it on the table, far enough away that I can still use my powers," explained Clark.

Bart did as he was told, and Clark removed his glasses. Furrowing his brow, he unleashed his heat-vision on the kryptonite and cooked it until it over-heated and became Black-K. "Now don't touch it, if anyone touches it, they'll split too."

"I'm not touching that, Snookie," warned HouseWife Lois. "I don't want _that_ back inside of me."

Seductress Lois growled, "And I'd like to leave the 1950's back where it belongs, the past."

Oliver rolled his eyes, "Whoever grabs it first gets to go home with the farmboy."

Without another word, both Lois's ran towards the table and grabbed the Black-K, causing them to merge together and turn back into the original Lois Lane. Clark rushed to her side, "Lois, honey, are you ok? How do you feel?"

"Don't ever let me do that again," groaned Lois. "I'll wear the outfits, but those bitches were annoying."

Clark smiled and kissed her, "There's my girl."

He helped her to her feet, Lois leaned out and patted Bart on his head, "Good boy, Speedo."

"I'm going to get out of here before she realizes she just said something nice to me," quipped Bart as he zipped away.

They rolled their eyes and Clark started to lead Lois towards the door.

"I'm surprised you didn't just pluck up one of them," joked Lois, though Clark could read her vulnerability like he was looking through her with x-ray vision. He knew her better than that, and she knew it.

He smiled, "The truth is, Lois... You are the sweet house-wife. And you are the sultry-seductress. But I like that I never know which one I'm going to get. You never stop surprising me, even after all this time, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

Lois blushed a little, turned her head to try and hide it. Clark pulled her face back to meet his gaze.

"I love you, Lois Lane," he all but whispered sweetly. "All of you. And I always will."

She sighed, "I've been running around in two pairs of heels all day today, I should be exhausted, and you still know just what to say to make me wanna drag you off to places unknown and jump you," she smirked. "My _Superman_."

Clark whisked her out of the apartment before she could say another word, leaving Ollie and Chloe to finally relax.

Ollie rocked on the balls of his feet, "Do uh... You think you might wanna-"

"I'm not touching any Black-K, Oliver!"

His jaw dropped open, "I never... Why would you... I... That's not..." Chloe rolled her eyes and walked away.

Oliver pouted, "I swear, Clark gets all the luck..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I know that you guys have been waiting to see what happens with the two Lois Lanes, so here it was! Hopefully it was up to the expectations and you guys liked it! In case you guys forgot what Clark was talking about, when Lex got split in two, he heated up the kryptonite ring to to bring them back together.

Anyways, make sure to shoot me a review and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I haven't made any headway on _Sidekick_, so it might be _Kandor_.


	236. Kandor

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - He does like to have his fun, doesn't he? haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - It drives me crazy when people call me Matthew instead of Matt, so I understand, haha. I'm glad that you liked it and I wanted to have a little moment with Ollie and Chloe, they don't get enough love in my story sometimes.

_**Jas-El**_ - I think I could have suffered through myself too, haha. I hadn't thought about the idea of having Conner and Kara there to see the chaos that was two Lois Lanes, haha. I might have to come back around to it, black-k is a bit of a goldmine for comedy and it seems like the idea of a character getting split into two was a popular notion.

I'm still pretty proud of that chapter, it was my first time incorporating the idea of a baby into Lois and Clark's life, something that I was never really for. But I loved Jo'an, and it made me want to give it a go. I'm glad I did. Jo'an is a lot of fun to write and really kind of builds off what I loved about Chris Kent. It was a new side of Lois and Clark I could get to write, a side that hadn't been able to be written about, and it gave us a new fun dynamic to play with.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - How could he notice when he's only got eyes for Lois?! I can't blame the man, haha.

_**doglover500**_ - I don't know about never stopping, but I intend to keep going! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It took a while, but I got there eventually, haha. I had a lot of fun writing the Past-Lois and Future-Lois bits in the Tempus story, so it kind of leaked over into this one a little bit, haha.

_**KuroiHanabixSheeny**_ - I could see how you would make that comparison between the two, they were kind of two girls from separate worlds, as weird as it feels to say that, haha. But I see what you meant.

I do like Starfire, I'm a big fan of the Red Hood and the Outlaws book despite the obvious flaws here and there, but I liked her pre-Flashpoint as well. It's now dawning on me that you meant the Teen Titans cartoon, right? I hadn't considered the idea of a pairing with Starfire, mainly because I kind of have her filed on the other side of the fold with the younger characters of the world like Supergirl and Nightwing instead of the Superman's and Batman's of the world. I hadn't read the Adrian Tullberg piece until you mentioned it, but it was a humorous piece. Reminded me a bit of "Losing Lois Lane."

I haven't read Rorschach's Blot's work, but I skimmed his Batman piece and it looked pretty interesting. Sounds like he really thinks things through quite a bit before he writes them. Ace of Clubs is coming! I promise, haha.

JLA: the Nail is one of those stories that I'll probably never really decide if I like or not. There elements that I really like, but in a lot of ways, I feel like it was the DC version of Watchmen and I've never really been a fan of Watchmen. I feel like that fact might skew my view of JLA: the Nail, but it was definitely an interesting read. I hadn't heard of planet_lois, but after checking it out, it seems like it's quite the hoot, haha. I've seen the LoisJoanneLane quite a bit though.

_**Tomarison**_ - Bart is kind of everybody's favorite punching bag, haha. And yeah, that's just how Lois Lane is. She loves her Smallville and she doesn't care who knows, haha. I wonder what Chloe would have turned into, hahaha.

_**cathy03**_ - Happy New Year to you too! Big Bang is by far one of my favorite shows, haha. I love it every time they bring up comics or Firely, haha. I wanted to make it a surprise in the end, as much as I could, to take any feelings about Lex out of the equation and just appreciate the man dying. It was important that we didn't look at his sins but at his deeds. So I'm glad that you liked it! And I'm glad that you liked Black-K, I figured it was about time I finished it! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #236, Kandor

**Author's Note:** Alrighty folks, you wanted to know what the next big arc was, here we go!

* * *

Clark blinked a few times, reaching out to steady Kara.

"I don't care what Palmer says, I'm never going to get used to the shrinking process," she groaned.

He nodded, "He's been the Atom so long, I don't think he realizes how unsettling it is on the stomach."

Kara smirked, "Are you sure that's not just Lois' cooking?"

"Do you want me to tell her you said that?" Clark glared back.

"Alright, alright, I'll play nice," whimpered Kara. "You don't have to be some serious, Kal-El."

They stepped off the Atom's portal platform and made their way towards the heart of the city, planning to meet with Kara's mother Alura for a family dinner. Truth be told, they were the last of the House of El, and even under the circumstances of a tiny bottled city, it was nice to be with family. Of course, they were missing one crucial member, but he understood.

'_I puked in front of the Queen of Kandor, Smallville,_' she had groaned. '_I'm going to kick Ray's tiny butt..._'

He had given her a pass on the shrink-ray and dropped her off for a _Lane/Sullivan_ get-together in Star City on their way to the Arctic. His thoughts were cut off as he saw Councilor Tyr-Van heading their way, excited as can be.

"Has the time come? Are we leaving this place?"

Clark gave him a saddened look, "I'm sorry, Friend. But I haven't found a way to reverse the miniaturization process yet."

"Oh, I see," sighed Councilor Tyr-Van. "After the visit from your messenger, I thought the next time I would see you would be when we would be freed from our tiny prison. Forgive me, Kal-El, I meant no disrespect."

Both Kara and Clark exchanged looks, "No disrespect taken, but... a _messenger_?"

"Yes. Jax-Ur."

They exchanged looks again. This time, concerned. "Jax-Ur? Of Krypton?"

"Of course. He came to us not long ago. He told us the time was near for our liberation."

Kara frowned, "Jax-Ur was here? The Phantom Zone criminal?"

"The Phantom Zone?" asked Councilor Tyr-Van.

Clark nodded, "He was imprisoned there for the destruction of Krypton's moon, as well as the theft of Kandor itself. He was charged with assisting Brainiac with it's capture. He was the first kryptonian imprisoned in the Phantom Zone."

Councilor Tyr-Van was shocked. "Oh my... I had no idea... He appeared, I assumed on your behalf."

In a flash, Clark was pulling Kara by her arm and heading back to the portal generator. With the flick of a lever, the platform that Ray Palmer had built was lighting up and they were back in the Fortress of Solitude.

"This has to be Zod's doing."

Kara nodded, "Maybe when he broke out last time, he hoped to rally Kandor to his call. Maybe he wanted to free them and have them join him because he thought he'd win against you. But he failed."

Clark shook his head, "This is something else. I can feel it. Zod doesn't come at you from one angle, he always has a back-up and this has to do with his Plan B. Even though we lost..." he couldn't bring himself to say Chris' name. "...it was still too easy, and I've been trying to figure out why ever since. And now I know the right man to ask."

Leaving the chamber that held the Bottled City of Kandor, Clark made his way to the center of the Fortress.

"Jor-El!"

After a moment, a loud voice boomed from above. "Kal-El, my son..."

"I need you to locate a criminal within the Phantom Zone... I need to find Jax-Ur of Krypton."

Kara joined Clark at the center of the Fortress as they waited for Jax-Ur to appear before them. Clark had worked with Jor-El to create a safer Phantom Zone portal that only he and Jor-El could use.

"The criminal Jax-Ur is not within the Phantom Zone, my son..."

Both Clark and Kara exchanged looks of panic. "How is that possible? All those tethered to the Phantom Zone were returned after my last battle with Zod. How did Jax-Ur manage to remain on Earth?"

"As far as I can see, Kal-El... Jax-Ur is not on Earth..."

Clark shook his head, "Where is he?"

"_Ding-dong_."

They turned to see a familiar face floating down into the Fortress. "You guys really need to hire a better decorator."

"Hal?"

"In the flesh," he nodded as he landed. "Well, flesh under the admittedly flattering glow of a green will-power, but yes. I came to talk to Clark about something, but I'm always glad to entertain a lady."

Kara blushed lightly, "Are you ever not a flirt, Jordan?"

"Actually, Hal," interrupted Clark. "We're actually in the middle of something big right now."

"And I'm sure what I've come to talk about has to do with it."

Clark gave Hal his attention. "What is it?"

"Something big popped up on the Guardian's radar in my sector, so they tasked me to check it out," explained Hal. "And I don't really know how to tell you this, but you've got a planet heading your way."

Kara scrunched up her face, "A planet?"

Clark paled, "Apokolips?"

"No, no, not that purple pansy. Darkseid is starting a civil war on the other side of the 'verse. This is something that, well, I feel like I've seen a ghost, to be honest. It's not just a planet, it's moving. Towards Earth."

They were beyond confused, "What does this have to do with us? Do you want Kal-El try and push it away?"

Hal grimaced, "I came to you because... My ring says it's _Krypton_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Dun... Dun... Duuunnnnn... Well, what did you think? haha. Now, as I was proof-reading this, it occurred to me that I never wrote a chapter featuring the introduction visit to the Bottled City of Kandor nor Alura or Councilor Tyr-Van, and for that I am very sorry. It was on my to-do list, and I promise that it's coming double-time, because I honestly feel like I have that story so clearly thought out that I thought I already posted it. So that will be the next chapter!

But until then, I think we can kind of make it through this one on our own without too much trouble, Alura is Kara's mom and Councilor Tyr-Van is one of the remaining members of the Council of Krypton. Everything else should be fairly familiar and hopefully that was enough to get you through. So let me know what you thought! Shoot me a review!

**Next Up:** Not sure what the title will be, but it'll be Clark and Kara's first trip into the Bottled City.


	237. Ray Palmer

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El** _- There will be lots of Ray in this one! There's so many Green Lanterns, it's hard to make them all fit into a story, haha. I'm sure that we will see Guy at some point, I'm pretty sure I've mentioned him at least once, but I can't say for sure. Hal is my favorite, Kyle a close second, so if Green Lanterns come into the story, it tends to be one of them, but I'll fit in John and Guy at some point, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - They did come from the Bottled City, and Krypton was destroyed, haha. That's all just part of the fun! haha. You'll find out what it's all about in the chapter after this one. I love writing Hal, and I'm excited because he'll be int he chapter after this one, but that'll be it for my favorite Green Lantern. And remember, it's Jax-Ur, not the Dax-Ur we saw on Smallville, haha. Though people assume they are brothers.

_**KuroiHanabixShenny**_ - There's definitely a plan in the works concerning young Christopher. I haven't read it, I'll check it out though. I came upon FanFiction because a friend recommended I check out some Harry Potter stuff because we used to have debates about where the story goes or what had happened and I just started checking out what other kind of stories there were for different properties.

Well, by the same turn of the coin, I was a huge fan of the Night of the Owls. Everybody likes what they like, no harm there. Well, it was hard to do the Love Triangle for Two in Smallville because Lois and Clark clearly had a strong connection prior to Clark being the Blur, even if they didn't want to admit it. That definitely hampered it's functionality on the show in my opinion, though I didn't mind it.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm blanking on who he was on Superman: TAS, but I will say this, he is Phantom Zone related.

_**Tomarisun** _- It's definitely kind of taken on a life of it's own, hasn't it? haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - All will be revealed very soon, haha.

_**cathy03**_ - Then I guess you better stay tuned, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #237, Ray Palmer

**Author's Note: **Sorry it took so long, had a bit of writer's block on this one for some reason. But as promised, this is the first trip into the Bottled City of Kandor for Superman and Supergirl. Enjoy!

* * *

"Are you ready?"

She looked away from the bottle for the first time. She wasn't sure who said it. She looked from Clark's face to Lois, but it was the raised eyebrows of the scientist that gave her the answer. "Uh... Uhuh."

She felt a hand reach for her arm, "You ok, kid?"

"Of course... But she left my father when I was young, what if she-"

"It'll be good to see her," Lois nodded. "And if she isn't nice to you, I'll kick her ass."

Kara snorted. "You always make the best first impressions."

It was Clark's turn to snicker, Lois turned and gave him a pointed look. "Really? You wanna laugh about first impressions?"

Gulp.

"You're going to feel a rush," explained Ray Palmer. "I can't really describe it, after all these years, it's kind of become like second nature to me. You don't see the change, it's everything else that seems to change, even though it's you."

Clark nodded, "When we get inside, it's important that we don't disturb the status quo. It's been, we can't imagine what these people have gone through. I don't know what they know, they might not even know that Krypton is gone. And obviously, this is going to be a shock for you, Kara. And your mother."

"It's ok, Kal-El. I'm ready," she told him with confidence. "I'm ready for this."

He smiled, and Kara stepped up onto the platform. She took a deep breath, reaching out for the switch. She closed her eyes, flicked the switch, and in a flash she felt like she had been turned inside out. When she opened her eyes, she was in Kandor.

"Oh my!" whispered stander-bys. "Who is that?"

Kara gulped at the gawking on-lookers, "I am Kara Zor-El, does anyone know where I can find Alura In-Ze?"

"I think we found her," whispered a voice from behind.

She turned to see Clark, Lois, and Ray Palmer standing behind her. And right behind them, was a woman that Kara hadn't seen in many years. Her blond hair brought it all back, all too familiar as Kara saw it herself every day when she looked in the mirror. "Mother?"

Alura ran towards her daughter with tearful eyes, "Kara?"

They embraced in a fierce hug, "Mother! I can't believe I've found you!"

"I thought I would never see you again," she cried.

Kara leaned back, "I found the bottled city on Brainiac's ship, we've been trying to find a way to get inside and save you."

Alura looked at her companions, "I do not recognize your friends, Kara."

"Oh, Mother, this is Kal-El," Kara beamed. "Jor-El and Lara's son."

The mention of Lara was not missed on Alura, and Kara regretted mentioning it immediately. It was Zor-El's love for Alura that caused her parents to split apart. Clark noticed the look in Alura's eyes and decided to take over.

"It was wonderful to meet you," he smiled. "This is my friend Ray Palmer, he helped build the technology to get us into the city."

Alura nodded at Ray, "Thank you, Ray Palmer."

Ray smiled, "Like to what I can."

"And this is my wife, Lois Lane," Clark grinned and put a hand on Lois' shoulder.

Alura turned to Lois, whom was as pale as could be. "Are you alright, dear?"

Lois looked at Clark, wavered for a second, before turning and throwing up to her right. Clark and Kara grimaced while Alura and the Kandorians recoiled. Ray Palmer gulped and ran towards the portal generator. "Just flip the switch!"

In a flash, he was gone. Lois ripped her head around and growled, "Coward!"

She stopped back up and put on a brave face. Clark nodded. "Never happened."

"We're going to get you out of here, Mother," Kara grinned ear-to-ear. "Kal-El and our friends have found a way to get you out of this bottle and back into the world. We're going to be a family again, Mother."

Alura smiled, "My beautiful daughter. Here to rescue her people. I am so proud of you, Kara."

"We've created a system that should allow all of you to exit the bottle," Clark chose his words careful. He didn't know if the Kandorians knew what happened to Krypton. He didn't want to have to explain that now. Not when they should be a happy time.

Clark walked up and onto the platform, "This switch here should transport you, would you like to do the honors, Alura?"

She looked back at a crowd of exited Kandorians before nodding. Clark reached out and helped her up onto the platform. He hopped down and joined Kara, she was shaking with excitement. "Just flick the switch, Mother. I'm right behind you."

Alura smiled nervously, her fingers hovering over the switch. "I'll see you on the outside, my fellow Kryptonians."

She closed her eyes and took a large breath, flipping the switch. The machine hummed loudly, and then nothing happened. It took a moment for her to open her eyes. She expected to at least feel something. It made Kal-El's wife puke after all.

Her eyes opened slowly. Surprised and confused expressions met her gaze. "Did I break it?"

"No, of course not," Clark shook his head as he stepped forward. He pressed the button on the inter-com. "Ray, can you hear me out there? The platform isn't working, Alura wasn't transported out of the bottle."

A moment went by, "Boy Scout, yeah, I'm getting some crazy readings up here. There's some kind of tether."

"A tether? We're stuck here?"

"No, only the Kandorians. I'm seeing your signature, and you look fine. Alura's showing some kind of connection to the energy signature of the bottle itself. Put someone else up on the platform for me."

Clark waved for Councilor Tyr-Van to step forward, Alura stepped down. "Anything, Ray?"

"Same thing. It must have been some sort of protective tether to keep any inhabitants from escaping. I'm sorry, Clark, this is exit only for the three of you. I've never seen stuff like this." Clark could hear the worry in Ray's voice.

He turned back to the crowd of now disappointed Kandorians, looking at him with confusion. Kara embraced Alura, and he felt failure in his gut. He wanted to help these people. Ray had worked so hard to get them in and out of the bottle. And now they were right back where they were. Stuck in this bottle, away from the world they wanted so badly to rejoin.

"I know that I promised you that I could get you out of this bottle," Clark started. Putting in a bit of his Superman voice as he spoke. "Brainiac's grasp was stronger than we thought. But I will not give up."

Kara nodded, "We won't."

"I promise that I will find a way to get you out of this bottle. I will find a way to set you free. I promise."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I had a bit of a writer's block going on for this chapter, I'm not sure why, I knew how I wanted the chapter to go, it just wasn't coming out like I wanted it to for some reason. So I'm sorry it was so late! Anyways, that's how Clark and Kara come to the Bottled City and that's why they can't leave, which will matter here in a bit.

Anyways, shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** I'm not sure what I'm going to title it, but it will be the continuation of the last chapter after Hal came to the Fortress!


	238. Space

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas- El**_ - It was one of those things that I just couldn't pass up, haha. I'll just say this, I think that Zor-El's intentions with Lara won't help Clark any if it comes down to it. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

_**LoisNClark4Ever** _- Their being stuck is a very important aspect that will be brought up very, very soon. Brainiac isn't a friend of the Kandorians, haha. That much can be bold and underlined, haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - Brainiac don't like other people playing with his toys, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Gotcha, gotcha. Well, this Jax-Ur is very intelligent, and it's worth noting that a lot of people think Dax-Ur (the co-creator of Brainiac) is Jax-Ur's brother. I'll just toss that out for good measure.

_**HuroiHanabixShenny**_ - Well, all I'll say about that is that you'll have to keep reading to find out where I'm going, haha. I'm a stronger believer that Clark is very human, and that's more than DNA. He spent a long time on Earth not even knowing he was an alien. At his core, Clark believes that he is a normal person just like everyone else is.

_**cathy03**_ - By they, I meant the Kandorian's within the bottle itself, not Clark and Kara. Yes, the people in the bottle are not the same people that we saw in Season 9. The clones were of the Kandorian Army, the people in the bottle at residents of Kandor. Those people are tethered to the bottle, but Kara and Clark can freely come and go.

_**Tomarisun**_ - Thats the plan, but sometimes that easier said than done, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, one-sided Hal/Diana

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #238, Space

**Author's Note:** And here is part-two, and pretty much the springboard into the next big arc! Enjoy!

* * *

'_What if Krypton somehow still existed? I went there... I floated in the space I once called home... I felt the void where my family had tied,_' she mused. She looked at her cousin's serious expression. '_But not all of my family..._'

He had been so serious since Hal Jordan appeared in the Fortress. She was worried.

"Kal-El, what do you think this _is_?"

He didn't answer right away. He tried not to look her way. "I don't know, Kara. Just be _ready_ for anything."

She watched him closely for a moment. It wasn't like her cousin to hesitate like that. She could sense that something wasn't right with him, something that scared her. "You sound like you're _afraid_."

Clark turned just slightly to meet her gaze, hesitating again. "Just be ready, Kara."

It wasn't a short trip. About halfway across the solar system, and they were almost there. It helped that whatever it was that Hal Jordan's ring called Krypton was heading directly for them somehow. Clark didn't know what to make of it. Krypton was gone. It couldn't just reappear out of thin air. Something was afoot.

Was it Zod? He hadn't mentioned that part to Hal. He knew the horror stories, there was no need to panic him or the rest of the League until he knew exactly what was going on. They didn't like to admit it, but Zod scared the League.

Zod was powerful. Superman powerful. And Zod usually didn't come _alone_.

"Clark?"

He turned to Hal, "Yeah?"

"I wasn't there when you pushed Apokolips away and everything, so I don't know the _details_, but if need be, you can still go all _Willie Mays_ on this rock, right?" Hal turned to Kara. "Willie Mays was a _baseball player_."

"Oh," she said in a clearly _'because I asked?' _voice.

Hal rolled his eyes at Kara and turned back to Clark, "Anyways, so you can go all Willie Mays or _what_? Because if not, we should definitely go back and call _the Princess_."

"You know she _hates_ it when you call her that, right?"

"Clark," chuckled Hal. "Not every woman is like Lois, ok? Some women are _fine_ with the guy wearing the _pants_."

He halted in his flight and stared at Hal, "That's big talk coming from a guy wearing a _ring_, Jordan."

Hal glared, "The chicks _dig_ the ring, Boy Scout. And you trust me, _every_ woman wants to be treated like a _princess_. Just you wait and see, you'll be x-raying your way around the Watchtower one of these days and find me tied up with her _lasso_."

"Yeah, probably from the _rafters_ by the _neck_," muttered Clark.

A green light blinked from Hal's hand, causing him to ball of his fist and raise his ring to his ear. After a moment, he stared off into the distance. Clark looked out towards the oncoming planet. "What is it?

"We've got bogies."

Kara twisted her face in disgust, "I don't want to hear about what is in your nose, Jordan."

He tilted his head. "That's cute, little one, but I said _bogies_, not _boogers_. Something is heading our way."

It took Clark a second to find the shape coming their way. Two shapes, actually. They were moving fast. Too fast to be just two random masses floating through space. They were upon them before his micro-vision could dial in on them.

"Kal-El, I thought we might be seeing you sooner than later."

His brow scrunched up in confusion, he knew the faces in a second. How could he not? But... How?

"I don't understand, how are you... How is this possible?"

The male one shook his head, "We do not know. We are just as confused as you are no doubtably are."

"You know these folk, Supes?" Hal asked.

Kara tilted her head, "I... I know you... I know _both_ of you... How do I _know_ you?"

Hal's head shot up, "Wait, does that mean it's true? If she knows them, that means it's gotta be people from _Krypton_, right? Does that mean we've actually got Krypton heading our way, Supes?"

"She knows who these people are because they _are_ from Krypton, in a way."

"What?" Kara turned towards Clark. "What do you mean '_in a way_,' Kal-El?"

Clark was still processing, but her voice snapped him out of his haze. He didn't know how it was possible, but here they were standing in front of him. "Their names are Vala and Basqat, and they are _clones_ of the Kandorian Army."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I know it was a little on the short side, but the original version ran too long for my taste beyond that last note, and I thought that was a nice ending. This will be the last chapter with Hal, at least as far as I know, he wasn't originally in this chapter either. But as I'm sure you can guess, we'll get some other guest-stars in the very near future, both familiar and new! I'm excited for what's coming next!

Make sure to let me know what you thought though, and how you feel about our new arrivals! Can't wait to hear your thoughts! Shoot me some reviews and let me know, and I'll see you guys in a week!

**Next Up:** We'll just call it Part 3, because I honestly don't know what it's gunna be called.


	239. New Krypton

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas- El**_ - I think after this storyline, there will be a lot more humorous stuff, so I definitely think that I can do a little Hal/Diana story, haha. I definitely think there is some potential for some funny stuff with those two. I'll guess you'l just have to keep reading to find out whats going on, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - You shall see! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Only time shall tell! haha. I'm not sure Wonder Woman will be coming along, but you never know! They will definitely need backup by the end of this arc. Things are about to get crazy!

_**KuroiHanabixShenny**_ - I'm hoping there are some more twists to come, haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - You are way too good to me, you know that? haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #239, New Krypton

**Author's Note:** And as I'm sure you're all wondering about what is going on, I bring you Part Three!

* * *

"I thought you were in another plane of existence."

Vala shrugged, "Apparently we were too literal with our understanding. At first, we believed that we had until we met other life and realized that we were merely on the other side of the universe."

He recalled the times that Jor-El's words hardly met their literal expression. It brought him back to fearing being a puppet on Lex's strings when Jor-El threatened a way to control his powers, instead it meant he would be stripped of his powers.

"So you arrived and there was a city waiting for you?" Kara asked.

"We had the means to recreate Krypton. The seeds of our civilization, and a planet compatible with Krypton's terrain," Basqat explained. "We've only managed to rebuild remnants of our home, but it's a start."

Clark examined the buildings, "And you have no idea why you're heading towards Earth?"

"Our astronomers detected it almost immediately, all of our attempts to halt our movement have failed," Vala explained.

From the alleyway, someone was watching. '_This was not part of the plan_,' he wanted to hiss. '_Kal-El was not supposed to come here before the arrival. That meddling Green Lantern, we must act now!_'

He raced down the alley away from the visiting kryptonains.

It was like a maze how the streets zigged and zagged on the way to his destination. He knew that his accomplice would know to meet him. He always did. His accomplice knew everything. It was his plan. It was his whole grand plan. He checked the street, these were all former kryptonian military. They noticed a man sneaking into the Phantom Zone portal room.

Slipping inside, he closed the door carefully, trying not to make a sound. "Jax-Ur."

He whipped around, "Dammit, you insolent creature! Must you always sneak about like that!"

"In case you have forgotten, my friend, I am known here. And they know their own. It is miraculous enough that you move about unnoticed, a second strange face would only alert the Kandorians of our presence here."

Jax-Ur sneered, "We must do it now. Kal-El and Kara Zor-El are here. It must be done now."

The accomplice moved to the crystal console, "I am aware of their arrival."

"Are you sure that you can even do this?"

"I removed your tether from the Phantom Zone, did I not?"

Jax-Ur snarled, "This is not the same thing."

"I am the _BrainInterActiveConstruct_. I can do anything," hummed Brainiac as he raised his hand over the console.

Kara was nervous. Vala and Baqat had been showing them around New Krypton as they called it. They'd been at it for hours, and she felt so uncomfortable. She recognized so many of these faces, but she didn't really remember them. Especially since they were not actually the people that she recognized. They were clones. They weren't real people.

She flinched. '_Don't say that. Conner is a real person._'

But these people were different. Conner wasn't Clark. Conner wasn't from something that existed, he was half Clark and half Luthor. That made him an original. These people were copies of people who died on Krypton.

"Cloning is very frowned upon on Krypton," whispered Kara.

Clark nodded, "I know. But this might be all we'll ever have left of Krypton, Kara. This is something that you've wanted for so long. We haven't been able to save your mother or any of the Kandorians in the bottle, this might be it."

"Only a kryptonian raised on Earth could be such a defeatist," bellowed a voice from above.

They whipped around, looking to the skies where one man floated above them. Clark snarled, "Zod."

Vala and Basqat prepared beside Clark, "You are not welcome here!"

"Oh, if it isn't my traitorous brethren!" laughed Zod. "Unfortunately, I'm afraid that the decision as to whether or not I am welcome on my home soil does not fall to someone as lowly as you two!"

Basqat growled, "Your rank of General was stricken from you, Zod!"

Zod smirked, "Not me, you fool..." He lifted the Bottled City of Kandor over his head.

"Those are innocent people in there! You leave them out of this!" Kara shrieked.

"Oh, I intend to let them out of this, young Kara Zor-El!" he bellowed. "I intend to let them out of this cage that Kal-El has left them to all these years. He has never truly cared for his kryptonian brothers and sisters, but I will save them!"

Without another word, he jetted away. Clark, Kara, and the rest of the Kandorians followed quickly behind them. They raced behind Zod as he blew out of the city the Kandorian's had built. They followed Zod until he broke out across the unsettled plains of their planet. In a sudden motion, Zod ripped towards the ground.

There was a bright flash, they all halted and covered their eyes. And when the dust settled...

"By Roa..." Vala whispered. "It's Kandor..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Things are definitely starting to get churning now, aren't they? haha. I won't take up too much of your time, gotta run and answer the reviews for Flashpoint so I can post the new chapter there too! Make sure to take a second and let me know what you think!

**Next Up**: _Alura_.


	240. Jason

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas- El**_ - I'll just come out and say Brainiac doesn't have a huge role, but he is involved. In the New 52, the kryptonians are really anti-clone, so it was a dynamic I wanted to add to Kara just a little bit.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - Jax-Ur was a prisoner in the Phantom Zone, and will be explained more in coming chapters. No worries about no reviewing, we can't all find time! I can understand that completely! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - All I can say is things are about to get twisty! haha. A few chapters back, Clark talked about how Zod is the kind of person that covers all his bases, and always has a Plan B. Right now, Clark and Kara think this was Plan B and his assault on Metropolis and the events with Chris were his Plan A, but that might not be the case.

_**dessie77**_ - Thanks!

_**Tomarisun**_ - I'm glad you liked them! I write Hal with a cross of Malcolm Reynolds from Firefly and Richard Castle from Caslte in mind, haha. Oh how I wish Nathan Fillion could play him! There will be more to come! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - It would save people a lot of trouble, wouldn't it? haha.

_**cathy03**_ - This is only the set-up! haha. Wait until things really explode in Clark's face! Literally! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #240, Jason Todd

**Author's Note:** I know that the next part of the New Krypton storyline was supposed to be next, but I wanted to post this first! My bad guys! Hopefully you'll dig it and your burning questions don't mind waiting a week! haha. Enjoy!

* * *

"You mind?"

Clark looked offended, "Are you serious right now?"

"I fell," Bruce groaned. "Off a building. And you didn't do your swoop thing to catch me. Which, I will be taking up with Lois, because you always catch her, and I want to know what her secret is."

"Please don't have that conversation with my wife," Clark sighed. "And in case you forgot, I was busy."

Bruce rolled his eyes, "Please, Clayface is a cake walk. Now seriously, my ribs are throbbing here."

"I'm not going to blow on your ribs!"

He rolled his eyes, "Then at least get me an ice-pack from the infirmary, I can't crawl up those stairs right now."

In a blur, Clark was gone and half a second later, he was back. He tossed the ice-pack to Bruce, whom laid back on the ground and pressed the ice-pack against his ribs with what almost sounded like a moan of relief. "That's the stuff."

Clark let his feet dangle off the edge of the platform, wondering how deep the caves went.

"So how are things?"

He was snapped out of his thoughts, "Good. Got to smack around Mongul last week. That was fun."

"And the family? How's Lois? Kara and Conner too."

"Lois is on leave from work for smacking the coffee out of Cat's hand and accidentally burning an intern, there's going to be an inquiry about it," it amused Bruce how Clark made that sound completely normal. "Kara moved in with Bart."

Bruce winced in pain as he leaned up too quickly, "Are you kidding me? And you're ok with that?"

"She says he makes her laugh," Clark shrugged.

He rolled his eyes and laid back down. "At least tell me Conner isn't shacked up with Diana's sidekick."

Clark didn't answer. He just looked downwards again at the darkness of the caves. Bruce noticed. He was a master detective after all, not to mention one of Clark's closest confidants. "What is it?"

"...I'm starting to see a lot of Jason in him."

Now it was Bruce's turn to stare off into the abyss. _Jason_. The wound was still all too fresh. His second Robin, the son he had failed. Murdered by the Joker. The wound had barely begun to scab when Jason resurfaced as the Red Hood, somehow brought back to life by the horrors of one of Ra's al Ghul's lazarus pits. He was changed in those pits.

"When he came back, you said he was enraged that you didn't kill the Joker. That he thought he'd be the last one you'd ever let the Joker hurt," Clark recalled. "Conner talks that exact way now."

Bruce grimaced as he recalled the memory of Jason trying to force him to kill the Joker.

"He screams about what Lex has done to him, what Lex has done to me. To Lois. To everyone. I can hear this darkness in his voice... Like he thinks the world would be better off without people like Lex in it."

There was a long silence. "Would it?"

Clark turned to look at Bruce. The frown was evident, but it wasn't accusing. Bruce was merely verbalizing a thought that they had both asked themselves countless times. A thought that could easily be their undoing.

"Every time that Joker breaks out of Arkham, there's blood," Bruce said with a hint of anger in his voice. "He murders, he tortures. He paralyzed Barbara for damn sake. Sometimes I think about how all those lives could have been saved, how many lives have been shattered by him, and _I wonder_. What if? What if I put a little blood on my hands. Just this once. Sometimes I stand in his latest victim blood, knowing that it's on my hands too, and _I wonder_."

It took a moment for either of them to speak.

This was a dark moment. A moment where they had to consider the worst.

"No."

Bruce looked over at Clark, and Clark kept talking. "We're more than just crime fighters. We're more than just people trying to help the police reel in the bad guys. We have an example to set for the people."

"But I'm not like you, Clark. People already think I'm a criminal. They're already scared of me."

"They still see that the Batman doesn't kill. No matter what, he doesn't kill. You might break the law, you might have to use intimidation to do what you need to do, but people know that the Batman is still a hero. We don't cross that line."

He smiled just a bit, "You still believe that people will change, don't you?"

"I'm never going to give up on people. And I have to live with the lives that are lost because people like Lex are still out there hurting people. And it's hard. Every time I have to decide between a robbery and a fire, every time I can't save them all, it's a weight that will be with me for the rest of my life, but I will not give up on them."

"What about people like Lex? People like the Joker?"

Clark got steely. It was his Superman Speech look as the Leaguers liked to call it. "I believe they can change too. I believe that someday Lex Luthor will see the error of his ways. And until then, I'll be there."

"And people will see the light," he laughed.

"People can already see the light, Bruce," smiled Clark. "It's our job to show them it's worth stepping into."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Like I said, I wanted to change it up and do something a little different to break up the long arc since there are many more chapters to come with the New Krypton storyline. Something with a little more humor and a little different tone. Conner is likely to have a bigger part coming up in the near future, maybe not with New Krypton but in another idea I've got, so I wanted to kind of touch base with him.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me some reviews, folks!

**Next Up:** _Alura_, for real this time, haha.


	241. Alura

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm not sure anybody quite matches up to Lois Lane, haha.

_**Jas- El** _- I've always deeply loved the Superman/Batman relationship, and their book was one of my all-time favorites. I didn't really have a time in mind for it, but that works plenty. Conner is going to have a role in the next arc, so I wanted to get him back into the minds of everybody a little bit. He definitely struggles with his Luthor side.

_**Mpj891** _- I'm glad that you liked them!

_**Guest** _- I've got something cooking that hopefully will help! haha.

_**crazhpcfan**_ - They aren't just people who stop crime and put out fires and save cats from trees. They stand for something more, especially Superman, and show the world you can be _better_.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I always like writing those two together, haha. Especially when they're just hanging out in the Cave talking about whatever comes to mind. Jason was spirit breaking for Bruce and Conner could easily go that path too, though in a different way. There may come a time when Bruce might have to remind Clark of these things.

_**alexindigo**_ - Real life can be such a pain, can't it? haha. I promise before I mark this story as completed and ride off into the sunset, there will be a full fledged M chapter for you, haha. Been well, Clois haven't been addressed since Grant Morrison is doing his acid trip thing in Action Comics (though the new writer says he loves Clois and wants them back together!) and the last like five issues of Superman have dealt with the same night with the H'el on Earth crossover, so no news!

Man of Steel remains a mystery though, beyond a potentially female Jimmy Olsen and some kind of robot army for Zod. I'm gunna try and do a few humor chapter interwoven with this storyline, since I think a lot of people miss Jo'an too, haha.

_**C.A.M.S. 22**_ - It won't be the last we hear of it, I can say that for sure!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #241, Alura

**Author's Note: **Alrighty then, here's the next part of the New Krypton storyline! It's a little on the long side!

* * *

Speech evaded them.

For some, they had never thought they'd see home again. For Clark, he knew that this wasn't the good news that his cousin beside him saw it as. For Kara, she eagerly searched the horizon for her mother.

"Mother..." she whispered. "Mother... Are you there?"

Moments of silence felt like eons. "Kara?"

The ground kicked up from beneath her feet as Kara jetted across the distance to embrace Alura. "Mother!"

Clark wanted to be happy for them. But like Vala and Basqat beside him, he knew that the smirk on Zod's face as he floated down to greet the Kandorians could only be bad news. Zod raised his arms into the air.

"My brothers!" he bellowed. "My sisters! Does it not feel good to be rid of that torturous cage!"

The cheers of the Kandorians seemed to echo in Clark's ears.

This was his plan. These people didn't know any better. They never knew the horrors that Zod would unleash. To them, he was a hero that had saved them from decades of isolation from the rest of the world.

"Thank Roa for you, my General," Alura beamed.

Kara's eyes grew wide as she stepped in front of her mother. "You cannot trust him! He is no hero, Mother!"

"But Kara, he has saved us from the Bottled City," Alura said in confusion. "General Zod has brought us back together, can you not see what a heroic deed that is? Can you not see that he is our savior?"

Basqat stepped forward, "Zod was imprisoned in the Phantom Zone for his crimes again Krypton, he cannot be trusted."

Alura looked him up and down. "My brother-in-law's nightmarish contraption? No kryptonian should have had to endure the horrors that place contained! Clearly he has been rehabilitated and seeks to serve Krypton once more!"

"My father placed Zod in the Phantom Zone for the destruction of Krypton," Clark said with frost in his voice.

"And you witnessed this, Kal-El?"

Clark looked at Kara, then back at Alura, "Of course not, but my father-"

Alura looked to the residents of New Krypton, "And you? Did any of you witness this?"

Zod's smirk only grew as none could possibly say that they had witnessed such a tragedy. The Kandorian Army knew only of Zod as a hero on Krypton. Clark could feel it in his bones that this was Zod's plan all along.

"Even Jor-El wouldn't dare ask me to convict someone of a crime of which there is no evidence, Kal-El," Alura said with a matching coldness. "Now if you will excuse me, I see that there is a new Science Council Temple, I'd like to see it."

Alura left with the rest of the Kandorians following behind her.

"She doesn't know what she is getting herself into," Clark gritted his teeth.

Vala stepped forward, "We must convince her that Zod can only bring destruction to the peace we have built here."

Clark nodded, "I'll do it. I'll convince her of the truth."

"You can't convince her, Kal-El," Kara sighed. "She still holds a grudge for what my father tried to do... I don't think that she will listen to you, but I know that I can convince her. I know that I can show her the truth."

The three of them exchanged nods, "I won't let Zod hurt anyone else, Kara."

"Me neither. Let me talk to her, Kal-El."

Clark nodded, staying with Vala and Basqat as Kara followed her mother into the temple. Once inside, she waited until Alura was alone and advanced on her with fire in her eyes. "Mother, what are you doing?"

Alura frowned, "What do you mean, Kara?"

"You can't trust Zod! You don't know what he did to Krypton. You don't know what he's done since it's destruction!"

A cool look set across her mother's features. "And I'm supposed to trust Kal-El?"

Kara's eyes grew wide, "Of course!"

"General Zod freed us from the bottle, Kara. Something that Kal-El seemed to be unable to do all this time."

"Mother, Kal-El didn't have the means to free you from the bottle. He has been trying since I recovered it. We both have. We have been working with Jor-El for months to rescue you, but nothing had worked!"

Alura quirked an eyebrow, "And yet Zod was able to do it so _easily_."

Kara shook her head, "He is in league with Brainiac! He showed him how to free you to save himself!"

"Or perhaps Kal-El enjoyed being the Alpha-Kryptonian. I find it a subject of great interest that he never even attempted to reach out to the people of New Krypton. Or that he never tried to rehabilitate the Phantom Zone criminals."

"You can't possibly think that of Kal-El, Mother... He is of your own blood..."

Her mother held up a hand, "No. He is of your blood, Kara. Of the House of El. As your father proved when he abandoned me for your beloved Aunt Lara, I was not worthy of his love. Why should Kal-El be any more worthy than anyone else?"

Kara blinked in shock, but stood her ground. "Kal-El has done nothing but protect me since I arrived on Earth. He protected the people of New Krypton, he was prepared to sacrifice his life on Earth to protect them!"

"You say that as if it would have been some great loss, Kara. The people of this planet are his people, not the ones of Earth. I always found the humans to be a lesser, weaker version of us. He must enjoy lording over them to want to stay."

A look of disbelief set in for Kara. "So what does that make me? I chose to stay. I didn't seek out New Krypton."

Alura eyed her for a moment. "Daughter-"

Screams from the street outside screeched into their ears. Kara sprinted back to the street, to find both Vala and Basqat dead on the ground and Clark slumped against a wall on the opposite side of the street. "Kal-El!"

She raced over as he started to wake, "Kara..."

"What happened? Vala and Basqat... What happened?"

He grimaced, "I don't know... Too fast... They used kryptonite... I was walking away, I should have died..."

Kara slowly helped him to his feet as people in the street began to crowd into a panicked mob. Their leaders were dead, and their killers were gone in an instant. Their fears of vulnerability from their time on Earth came back all too quickly.

"Who would do such a thing?!" shouted a voice from the crowd.

As if waiting for his moment, Zod stood. "Spies from Earth!"

Clark spoke up, "You don't know that."

"Don't I, Kal-El?" mocked Zod. "The people of Earth, are what drove most of you to this planet! They fear us! They've always feared us! And now, after Kal-El and Kara Zor-El appear here, there is a sudden attack?" Few could play a crowd like he could, and Clark knew it. "Tell me, brothers... sisters... How many attacks were there before their appearance?"

The murmur across the crowd told everyone that there hadn't been any.

"Humans don't move that fast!" shouted Clark.

Zod sneered. "I've seen the new would-be heroes of Earth... I've seen what they are capable of... Green Lanterns, and men who can move even faster than we... Teleporters that could attack our leaders and be at the docks in a moment? I know that Earth has such people... And I shall travel to Earth to find them! To bring them to justice!"

The crowd began to cheer.

Kara turned to Clark, "How could they turn on Earth so quickly?"

"Zod knows that the Kandorian's fear of humans," Clark almost whispered. "He knows how scared they were before they left Earth... He knows that they will rally. He knows that this would be what would join them..."

She looked at the crowd chanting Zod's name. "What's going to happen, Kal-El?"

Clark looked terrified. "War."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Things are really starting to get churning now, aren't they? haha. You could just tell Zod was going to be up to no good, and now this? What's going on?! Who killed Vala and Basqat?! And with a kryptonite gun?! Make sure to shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought!

Btw, I've gotten some requests for some humorous chapters, so I might start to weave like I did with the Death of Superman and will try to post something funny for the next chapter, so I'm not sure what is next!


	242. Sidekick

**Review Comments:**

**_Jas- El_** - Lois is going to factor in heavily in a few chapters, so I've kind of been saving her for that. It's hard because I always think about what Lois would say or do in a situation, but she is on the horizon!

_**alexindigo**_ - I feel like once the He'l on Earth crossover is done, we're going to see the repercussions of the Superman/Wonder Woman storyline in Clark's personal life, but I can't say that for sure. I know Diggle is pro-Clois, so I'm hoping he has seniority over the SuperFamily writers. Plus Scott Snyder's new Superman book will probably have some more Clois vibes going in too. So I'm pretty optimistic on that front.

I liked Begins and TDK, but Nolan is hardly an expert on comics, not even for Batman. Having said that, I will be in line to see what shakes out with Man of Steel. Well, here is so Jo'an for you! And Lois is coming soon in New Krypton!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Zod definitely had a grand plan for all of this, we'll just have to see how it unfolds! The fallout of Vala and Basqats deaths will be at the forefront of the next chapter, so keep an eye out! Lois is coming! I promise! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - That story definitely weighs heavily into the story, but hopefully I've got some other curveballs for you!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - Things are going to come into focus soon! I'll try and write a Oliver/Carter story too! haha.

_**Tomarisun**_ - I love writing Bruce and Clark, they're so different and yet so similar. Everything with the Kandorians is about to come to the forefront and some serious implications of the assassinations are coming!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #242, Sidekick

**Author's Note: **Alright, you guys wanted some humor, hopefully this will tide you over! Enjoy!

* * *

"No, absolutely not."

"But-"

"You are not going to be my sidekick!" Clark shouted back to cut her off.

A stomp could be heard across the entire farming town of Smallville.

"Don't break the floors in here again," he pleaded. "I just replaced them after the rocky road fight you had with your mother." She opened up her mouth, but he cut her off. "I don't care that she took the last scoop."

Jo'an folded her arms with a huff, "I called dibs."

"She did call dibs, Stretch," Bart nodded. "I remember because she pulled my arm out of the socket when I tried to eat it."

"Lois or Jo'an?" Clark asked.

Bart hung his head, "Jo'an just lit my pants on fire. It was Lois who jerked me out of the freezer..."

"People! People!" she shouted. "You're getting off topic here!"

Shaking his head, Clark simply said, "No."

"What? Why not?!" she groaned. "Uncle Bruce has a Robin! Uncle Ollie has a Speedy! Even Uncle Barry has Bobo!"

Bart gasped, "I... _am not_ a sidekick!"

Clark turned to his taco-loving friend with fire in his eyes, "Really?" he whispered harshly.

"I was doing the hero thing _before_ Barry, in case you forgot, Amigo!"

Clenching his eyes shut, Clark snapped at him in hushed tones. "But if you _were_ a sidekick, then I could just say _Conner_ was mine and this entire conversation would be over!"

Bart gulped a little, "Oh..."

"Honey, I know that you want to help..." offered Clark. "...but you're not old enough quite yet. Remember? Like the rules Mom made about you dating? You have to be a certain age to join the League."

Nudging from the side, Bart offered "I wasn't _that_ old when I joined the team."

"You're the oldest person in this room, Future Boy!" shouted Clark.

Bart grimaced, "But I've aged _gracefully_, right?"

Jo'an tilted her head, "You _can't_ be serious, Daddy."

Clark turned to his daughter, "What?"

"Damian is only _ten_ years old, and Uncle Bruce lets him be Robin."

"But, Honey-"

She crossed her arms. "And he doesn't even have _powers_."

"I got this, Stretch," Bart nodded cockily and stepped in front of Jo'an. "You see, here's the thing, we don't actually let Bruce put himself in any danger. We take turns watching over him to make sure he can't get hurt."

Jo'an looked at him like he was crazy, "What?"

Bart nodded, while Clark facepalmed behind him. "He doesn't even have _powers_! We can't let him fight crime!

"Uncle Ollie doesn't have powers," she narrowed her eyes.

"Dude could hit a target from like, a gazillion miles away, he's got like super-cordination or something! I mean, yeah, that's like the worst super-power ever, but it's something, right?" Bart explained.

A beep from Bart's phone stopped his speech, he looked down at the screen. '_I heard that. - Bats._'

Bart spun around to Clark, "How?!"

"He's Batman," Clark shrugged.

In a flash, no pun intended, Bart was out of the kitchen and halfway to Mexico. Clark turned back to Jo'an, who was even more convinced than she was before that this was a bunch of malarkey. "Aunt Kara should become SuperWoman."

"What? Why?"

She rolled her eyes, "Because then I can be Supergirl!"

"I don't think that Kara would want to change her name to SuperWoman," Clark tried. "Especially after your Mom got called that after her birthday present, remember? Kara wouldn't want that pressure."

Jo'an blew a raspberry, "That was for one day!"

Clark sighed, "You know that your mom never lets anything go, Sweetie."

"I'm going to tell her you just said that if you don't let me be your sidekick," she smirked.

He paled, "You wouldn't."

"I would. I already used my allowance to buy some tights!" Clark sighed and hung his head. "And Grandma already told me she'd sew me whatever I wanted as long I didn't let Mom touch her sewing machine!

"You know that Grandma is a very busy lady, Jo'an."

She tilted her head, "You let her make costumes for you, don't you?"

Clark's eyes darted away as he muttered under his breath, "Only because she made the rule about your mother using the sewing machine after the little wardrobe malfunction I ended up having."

"She said you needed a zipper," Jo'an shrugged. "I told her it wouldn't stay zipped, but she said it was worth the risk. I still don't understand what she meant, why would you need a zipper?"

He paled again, "Uh... How about this? How about we make a deal?"

"What kind of a deal?"

"Uh, if you can do this one thing to prove you're very brave, and that you're not scared of anything, I'll let you become my sidekick," Clark explained. "But you have to complete your task first."

Jo'an grinned, "That's more like it, what do a girl gotta do to wear some tights around here?"

Clark got down on one knee like he was about to say something really important. He reached out and smiled at her, warmly at first, and then almost in pity as he rubbed her arm. "You can be my sidekick... If you can convince Mom."

She eyed him for a second. "You suck, Daddy."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I had the idea of Jo'an wanting to be a sidekick for a while now, I just wasn't sure how to expand it and that's why it's probably a little short for most folks' taste, but hopefully it will tide you over until the muse comes a-talking and gives me some ideas in that arena. But let me know what you thought!

Make sure to shoot me some reviews, and I'll make sure I come up with some more humor in the next few chapters!

**Next Up:** The next part of the _New Krypton_ storyline, not sure what the title will be.


	243. Science Council Hall

**Review Comments:**

_**Infinite Freedom**_ - That can be arranged, haha.

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was fun to write some Bart/Bruce stuff, haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - 30? I don't think Lois will let her do it when she's 90, haha. Batman has everything bugged, haha.

_**Jas- El**_ - He's a little bit of a creeper, haha. We know this, haha. Honestly, I have no idea how old Jo'an is anymore, haha. She is just permanently the same age in my mind, no matter how much time seems to pass in the actual story. I just never really imagine her as a teenager, or too young to have that crack of the whip sense of humor.

_**Lilbit4**_ - She's going to be a part of the New Krypton story, we just have to get back to Earth first.

_**LoisNClark4Ever** _- Clark just doesn't do well in those situations, hahaha. I see him as the reassuring one, not the one that has to tell her no or that has to explain certain things, haha. Bart was just there when I imagined it in my head. It really was sitting in my DocManager for about two months with just a handful of lines, haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm not sure when she is planning on finishing the story, in fact, I thought she already did because I was so behind on it for a while. I assumed she did, but I'll have to check it out and see. Beyond the first couple appearances, she kind of said, "You just do whatever you want with Jo'an" because I think I annoyed her too much, haha.

_**cathy03** _- I'm glad that you liked them! And I'm glad that I was able to put some range in them! haha.

_**Katlynne**_ - You is crazy, woman. You're way too good to me.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #243, Science Council Hall

**Author's Note: **Sorry this one is so late! The muse only wanted to talk _Flashpoint_ this week!

* * *

"You can't declare war on Earth."

Alura shook her head defiantly, "They have attacked us, on our own soil, Kal-El. Do you think I can just tolerate that? This was an act of terrorism and swift justice must be done upon them."

"It is not surprising to see him side with them, Alura," Zod all but snickered.

Clark glared at Zod, "You don't know that they came from Earth. And you aren't prepared for their forces."

Zod narrowed his eyes, "The humans would be defenseless against the superior beings of Krypton."

"There is a league of heroes, prepared to do whatever it takes to protect Earth," Clark tried to explain to Alura calmly. "They are not to be taken lightly. Any one of them would be a worthy opponent for any Kryptonian."

"They were hardly so imposing the last time I met them," Zod growled.

He shook his head, "You came with Phantom Zone prisoners. Murders and monsters. Look around, these people might have been soldiers in a past life, but that was a long time ago. They aren't prepared for that kind of violence anymore."

Zod turned to Alura with pleading eyes, "He warns us because his true allegiance is to Earth. He would stand with them."

Alura looked to her nephew, "Is that so, Kal-El? You would stand against your brothers and sisters of Krypton? For Earth?"

"I would hope that I never have to make that decision," Clark said firmly. "Nor Kara. Earth has become her home, just as it is mine. They are a good people. No matter what Zod believes, they mean to be. We have a New Krypton now, we don't need to bother with Earth. The assassins were through the street and on Vala and Basqat before they could blink."

"Earth has such beings," Zod countered. "I have seen them."

She simply hummed as she pondered the cases the two had made. "I will consider both of your arguments. I do not wish to sacrifice any more of the surviving lives of Krypton, but open war may be upon us. Give me time."

Both Clark and Zod nodded and left the room.

"What is your play, Zod?" Clark growled under his breath.

He smirked, "I wouldn't waste my words on a mind of such little comprehension, Kal-El."

Zod broke away from him once they were out of the inner-chambers of the Council's Hall. He made his way through a series of back alleys and nooks. When he arrived at his destination, he scanned behind him for followers.

"What of the assassins, General?"

He grinned to himself, "Everything is going exactly as we planned, Jax-Ur. I can see that Alura believes there were spies from Earth. You did well. Both with the deaths of the traitors, and with the realigning of the crystals to bring New Krypton here."

Jax-Ur nodded, "Thank you, sir. But it was the _BrainInterActiveConstruct_ that brought you here."

"That he did. He knows that Kal-El cannot be allowed to live, he will only interfere with our plans. We will destroy Earth and his support team, then we shall destroy him. New Krypton will take Earth's place, and we will live like gods."

"When will our brothers from the Phantom Zone be joining us, General?"

A twisted grin grew on Zod's face. "Once we murder Kara Zor-El, Alura will be putty in my hands..."

"Yes, sir. Shall I do it now?"

"No. Not yet. Kal-El will surely be plotting with her, he will be too close," Zod explained. "I will draw him away. The fool thinks he somehow avoided death. As if I wouldn't want him to be there to see Earth's destruction at my hands."

Jax-Ur nodded again, "As you wish, sir. I only need a signal, and her life will be mine."

They concluded their business and Zod made his way back to the market place where he undoubtedly found Clark and Kara awaiting the decision of Alura. "Where were you? If I find out you had anything to do with-"

"Silence, Kal-El," Zod waved a hand. "I was taking a stroll. Is that illegal now? I'd hate to displease you."

Clark's teeth gritted, "I won't let you ruin these people's lives like you did on Krypton."

Zod came in close so only Clark could hear him, "What I did on Krypton, will be a sweet mercy compared to what I will do to your precious Earth. And you will beg for a death as clean as the one your father received."

Rage was clearly building in Clark's eyes.

But before they could have words, or fists for that matter, something interrupted them. A beam of light erupted in the center of where the streets intersected. A cloaked figure knelt before them.

"Who are you?!" Zod bellowed. "Who dares step on kryptonian soil uninvited?!"

A snicker was all they would receive.

The figure pulled two weapons out of from beneath his cloak, and Clark immediately recognized them as kryptonite cannons that more than a few rogues had gotten their hands on back on Earth. "Everyone! Run!"

Advancing, Zod growled, "We do not run, Kal-El! We fight!"

Within a split second the cannons were raised and several Kandorians were shot down. He turned and aimed at Zod, who was narrowly able to avoid being shot himself. Clark ran forward to try and get closer.

"We need to do this smart!" he yelled. "Those blasts will kill any of us!"

He wanted to jump with joy. '_This is working out perfectly_,' Zod grinned. '_Leave it to the simpletons of Earth to send just the scapegoat I need to build my army and destroy them. I'll have to kill him before he can deny Vala and Basqat's deaths._'

"Stay back, Zod!"

He swooshed past Clark, "You lack the vision to do what is needed to protect our people, Kal-El!"

"No! Don't kill him!" he screamed.

With a swift blow, Zod punched the cloaked figure square in the chest. The figure shot across the intersection and smashed into the metal wall of the building opposite them. Slumping to the ground in a crumble, Zod approached.

He leaned down just enough to grab the figure by the throat and lifted him off the ground. "Reveal yourself, Assassin!"

The hood fell from the figure's face, and they were greeted by a grin.

"My name is Reactron," he wheezed. "And I've come to kill you all."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I'm sorry it was so late, but this was one of the few chapters that wasn't pre-written and the muse just didn't want to talk about New Krypton this last week! haha. Anyways, I managed to get it done thanks to a little insomnia and hopefully you guys liked it!

Anyways, shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought!

**Next Up:** Not sure, but it'll be one of the comedic ones.


	244. Reactron

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - My Reactron is a little different, but he's still definitely a force to be reckoned with. He was inspired by who he was in Superman: New Krypton, but I tweaked some stuff to streamline my story a bit. Jax-Ur was the one that killed Vala and Basqat, when they said assassins, they were referring to the ruse they were trying to pull, haha.

Zod definitely has plans that are bigger than Alura, but he'd love to have her on his side, and he definitely has plans to get her on his side. Clark and Kara are in a bad way, and it's only going to get worse, haha.

_**White-Falcon-06**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It's fun writing something a little more serious, though I do miss writing the comedic stuff too. But I kind of get to do that over in Flashpoint, so I just need to channel some of KMorKM too.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'll let you read this chapter, and explain who he is in the comics after. I don't wanna spoil anything! haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - Zod definitely has plans against Clark, and Earth, but they aren't the only two with plans, muahaha. I'm definitely planning on using Jo'an until she asks me not to, but the last time we talked, she said she liked that I wrote her because it was like "an advertisement for my story", so I don't think it'll be a problem!

_**shelle-edwards (I swapped a dash for the period because it thinks its a link and deletes it)** _- I'm glad that you like them so far! Looking forward to seeing what you think of the rest!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #244, Reactron

**Author's Note: **I know this one is a little late, but my computer got fried, so that's been hampering my writing! Enjoy!

* * *

Things couldn't possibly have worked out better for General Zod.

He grinned as this mysterious Reactron was buckled into a chair for interrogation. He had hoped to prey upon the all too familiar fear of humans to marshall the Kandorians to his whim. Kal-El had been trying to circumvent him, but he knew of Jor-El's brother's affection for Lara. Alura would not side with Kal-El lightly.

The last time he was on Earth, before that damned Lor-Zod had defied him, he had found the Bottled City of Kandor in the Fortress of Solitude. Kal-El's sanctuary away from the rest of the human world. He knew that he could use it.

'_And now this foolish human assassin_,' he grinned. '_Doing my work for me._'

Zod turned to Alura, "We should take him into the town square and execute him. Show the humans what happens when you come to assassinate kryptonians. We must make an example of him."

"No!" growled Clark. "He must go to trial. And we still don't know he killed Vala and Basqat."

Alura frowned, "If he did not, then who did, Kal-El? Are you suggesting one of our own did this?"

A full blown grin broke out across Zod's face, but he would quickly fight it back. "It does not surprise me, Alura. Kal-El has never trusted in his own people. He forced the Kandorians to pretend to be humans on Earth."

Clark gritted his teeth, "I was trying to protect them."

"So these humans are to be feared?" Alura asked. "They do wish to do us harm?"

"It's not that simple," Clark almost had to whisper. He looked up at Zod, and only someone who had faced him this many times could see that twinkle in his eye. '_I played right into his hand,_' Clark wanted to groan.

Finally, afraid to take a side in this conversation, Kara spoke up. "Kal-El is right. The humans might fear what they do not know, but they have embraced by Kal-El and myself. And we are not on Earth and we mean them no harm. They would not attack without being provoked. We need do not need to fear the humans."

Alura eyed her daughter for a moment. "This man is of Earth, Kara. He already admitted so."

"One man isn't enough to condemn an entire planet, Alura," Clark pleaded.

"You two must choose where your allegiance truly lies," she snapped. "Is it with the back water planet that your fathers sent you to? Or is it with your own people? We are your true family. Your loyalty should be to us."

Kara shook her head, "But these are not our people, Mother."

"How could you ever say-"

"They are clones, Mother," Kara all but whispered. "Only the Kandorians from the Bottled City are true. They were all lost during Krypton's destruction. Even _he_ isn't the real General Zod."

Zod advanced on her, "I am as real as they come, Girl!"

"General!" Alura shouted. "Come. We must interrogate this menace the humans have sent."

They left and entered the room that was holding Reactron. Kara and Clark watched through the glass as Zod demanded to know where he was from and who sent him. They had brought Reactron to one of the deepest bowels of the temple. He had never seen this man before, but there was something _familiar_ about him.

"Clark... I'm sorry I haven't spoken up more," Kara said with her head hanging.

He shook his head, "You lost your mother for so long, it isn't right that you should have to fight her just when you got her back. We will convince her that Zod is wrong. I just have to make her see it our way."

She nodded, "Do you think that whoever this is killed Vala and Basqat?"

"I don't know..." he answered honestly. "I have to think Zod had a hand in it. They would have fought harder than anyone to keep Zod from regaining power. He had to take them out if he was going to lead again."

Kara watched as Reactron gave them nothing. There was something familiar about him to her. He wore a golden chest plate that looked almost, grown out of his actual body. A silver light dead center, where his heart out have been. They had tried to remove it from him, but they couldn't. Not without killing him it seemed.

"Clark... Doesn't he look... familiar?"

He nodded, "I feel like I've seen this before. Something like it."

"Of course you have, Kal-El. Your humans have been trying to kill kryptonians for years."

They turned as Zod and Alura rejoined them. Clark shook his head. "Every type of life form has good and bad, Zod. Just look at you and me. You murdered our entire planet, not that anyone seems to hold that against you anymore."

"You asked me to hold this man for trial, Kal-El," Alura stepped between them. "Does Zod not deserve the same?"

Zod grinned. '_Like candy from a baby..._'

"The General spent what I can only imagine felt like lifetimes inside that horrid Phantom Zone your father created," she said bluntly. "Do they not believe in second chances on Earth? Do they not believe in rehabilitation?"

Clark gritted his teeth, "I only ask you don't let him poison your perspective, Alura. He can stand trial."

A gasp broke their intense staring contest.

They turned to Kara, who was holding her hands over her mouth. "What is it?" Clark asked. "What's wrong?"

"I know where I know this work from..." she whispered. "I know what that light reminds me of..."

Clark shook his head, "What?"

"Corben, Clark... It's the same as Corben's..."

His eyes grew wide as realization set in. A slow, evil laughter echoed from within the interrogation room. "And to think I didn't believe him when he said you'd bring me to the deepest part of the city..."

Zod ripped open the door to the cell, "Speak! What is this?!"

Reactron's eyes and the light on his chest began to turn a light shade of green. "I was an atomic bomb's worth of energy, but he built me this containment suit. With a little upgrade of course..."

The four started to sweat and tremble with pain as the green grew brighter. "We have to go," Clark groaned.

"No... I will not let him stop us," Zod grunted. '_Has my anger for Kal-El blinded me from the obvious?_'

Kara grabbed her mother as the light began to pulse, faster and faster. She pulled her towards the stairs, "We have to get out of here, Mother. We have to get everyone out of the city... Come now..."

Clark pushed Zod towards the stairs and they started to run, but all of their super-hearing heard Reactron's last words.

"Lex Luthor sends his regards..."

The surface of New Krypton trembled. And Clark knew that they had served up the entire planet when they took Reactron to the bowels of the city. Somehow he knew the Kandorians were coming. Somehow he knew the layouts. Of course Lex would know. That's what he did. He knew things. He planned this all out. He had killed them all.

Streets cracked open, buildings began to collapse around them. Clark did what he could to try and help people out. Yelling that they had to fly, get as far away as they could. "Get off the planet! Now!"

Kara tried to carry Alura the best that she could.

"Mother! You have to stay with me!" shouted Kara. Alura was already growing weak and the Kryptonite had just began to be released into the air. "Mother, you aren't strong enough, stay close to me!"

Beams of light erupted from the cracks of what had been the Capital City now falling into ruins. Clark tried his best to get as many out of buildings and into the air, but the Kryptonite blast left most of them crippled and were lost. Only someone like Clark or Kara, with the countless exposures to the toxic green fumes could stay airborne.

Kara carried her mother, Clark tried to carry others. He thought he could make out Zod floating in the distance.

He could literally feel the pulse of Reactron's building energy, and he knew that the worst had yet to come. He closed his eyes as the light retracted away, only to come back with a vengeance and destroy what was left of the city. Countless perished in an instant, Clark and Kara were shot into the vastness of space.

Darkness descended over him, he was unsure if Kara was alive or dead. He was unsure if he would survive. He cast a glance back towards New Krypton, fractured and destroyed, floating in many different directions.

He wanted to help the other floating kryptonians, but truth be told, he needed help himself.

'_What have I done?_' he wondered as it all faded to black.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What did you think? This turned out way longer that I had planned, but hopefully you guys don't mind, right? haha. And things have now gotten as crazy as they could possibly get, right? Not so much, haha. My favorite parts have yet to come, and everyone's favorite reporter will be back with a fury in the next part!

Anyways, make sure to shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought! I know that I was supposed to do a fun/comedic chapter this week, but this is what came so hopefully you don't mind!

**Next Up:** Definitely a comedic chapter, already have it planned, just don't know the title yet!


	245. Blind Date

**Review Comments:**

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Things are definitely going to get serious, as if they hadn't already been! haha. And seriously, what back-up is better than Lois Lane? haha. Reactron is an interesting character, I definitely suspect we haven't seen the last of him, but I don't know if he'll be back before the end, you'll have to wait and see!

Lex has oh so many plans up his sleeve, and he always knows whats going on before anyone else can even blink, but he'll be appearing very soon and he'll have plenty to say! Alura should have listened to Clark, but she let her pettiness blind her. She is going to have to eat a lot of crow if she knows whats good for her!

_**Katlynne**_ - You is too good to me.

_**Tomarisun**_ - I couldn't let Zod have all the fun, not this close to home, Lex Luthor doesn't let just anything go down in his backyard! Cliffhangers keep you guys coming back for more thought! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 and the ever lovely LoisClarkNLove!

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, J'onn/OC

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #245, Blind Date

**Author's Note: **This is just something kind of silly, please don't bring politics or religion into the reviews, no one needs to have their feelings hurt and this was just a bit of fun we had with one of favorite characters. Enjoy!

* * *

"So... what's J'onn's _deal_?"

Clark looked up from the monitor at Watchtower. "What?"

She peered around him, doing her best to utilize her Lois-Lane-Sneakiness, eyeing everyone's favorite Martian from across the room. "Like, does he _date_? For all the inter-League hanky panky that happens around here, I never hear _squat_."

"Uh... I don't know," he shrugged. "His family died in the Martian War. He keeps to himself."

Lois gave him a wide eyed look. "You mean he hasn't been on a date since his family died?"

"I really don't keep _tabs_ on that sort of thing," Clark said with an amused look on his face. "Why are you interested in his love life? I thought we had a talk about _meddling_ in other people's love lives after the Diana/Hal _fiasco_."

"Hey, I have _way_ more wins than losses, Smallville," she warned. "Look at Jimmy and Lucy!"

Clark frowned, "That happened without you knowing, and then you tried to kill Jimmy over it."

She huffed, "I didn't try to kill him! He was the one stuffing his face Bart-style and I just didn't really stop him... Or give him the heimlich right away. And speaking of stuffing your face Bart-style, look at J'onn!"

"What about him?"

"Look at how he eats those Chocos!" she groaned. "Look how he savors them! It's like they're the love of his life, would you really want Jo'an to watch him eat like that? He needs some loving, pronto."

Oliver sat down with a thud, "She's seen worse in that Loft. Even thought of investing in a door? And a lock? And lead?"

She turned with a snarl, "You're lucky you're married to my baby cousin, because otherwise I'd be cut you, Bow-Boy. And you're one to talk, how about the time we caught you and Chloe in the BatCave? Want me to drop that bomb?!"

"What? Chloe?" Lois looked at Clark, who was shaking his head. "Yeah, on my way, babe!"

Oliver quickly jumped out of his seat and to run off to wherever he pretended Chloe was calling him from. "Yeah! You better run!" she shouted after him before turning to Clark. "Seriously, we need to get J'onn a girl. No one should love food that much, he's going to be busting at the seams when he gains three hundred pounds of Chcos!"

Clark tried to hide a chuckle under his breath. He failed.

"What was that?!"

He gulped and waved his hands around, for no reason. "It's just... Honey... People can hear you in our office sometimes... With your ice cream... They're always surprised when I walk by and they realize I'm not in there..."

Lois let her jaw drop open, "What the hell are you talking about?!"

"You moan with every bite!" Clark laughed. "Honestly, I get a little jealous sometimes..."

"I do no such thing!"

Tess walked by with a laugh, "I can hear you in the Business Department, Lane."

With a huff, Lois folded her arms and burrowed herself into the couch. "You guys suck, you know that? We get a lot of sun in our office, it's freakin' hot in there! You know it's true, Smallville!"

Clark muttered under his breath, "That's what you tell me when you start peeling off clothes anyways..."

"I can cut you too, you know?!" she growled. "Can we just find a girl for J'onn already?!"

He sighed, thanking the heavens for her lack of an attention span. "I really don't even know who we'd set him up with. Half the League is already dating the other half of the League already."

"There's gotta be someone out there that will tickle his fancy!"

Later that night, Lois dragged Clark to the little cafe where she had told J'onn to meet his blind-date. Running out of people in the League to pair him up with, she decided to set him up with a reporter for the bullpen. Cute little blonde, a little ditzy, not a bad thing for a guy who has to disappear at the drop of a hat with a mostly worthless excuse.

She nudged Clark in the ribs, "What are they saying?!"

"We really shouldn't eavesdrop on people like this, Lois," he sighed.

"Kiss or Kill, Smallville," she warned. "Kiss or Kill."

He rolled his eyes and let his super-hearing do the work as he dialed into the table across the street. It took a moment with the crowd and all, but within seconds, he was in tuned with the conversation at hand.

"Lois told me that you work at the Police Department?"

J'onn nodded. "I'm a detective for the MPD. I've worked with Lois on stories before. What do you do, Marie?"

She blushed a little bit, "Nothing so important. I'm working under Cat Grant, she does Entertainment and Arts, I do a lot of the leg work for her. Not exactly what I thought I'd be doing when I was hired by the Daily Planet."

"Sometimes it's the little nuances of society that hold it together," he said in that sage J'onn J'onzz voice.

"Wow," she grinned.

He reached out and held her hand, "I have to be honest with you, however. Lois set us up on this blind date, and as I'm sure you know, it's very hard to say no to her. Unfortunately, I'm already seeing someone."

"Oh," Marie said, a little letdown. "I see."

A man stepped over to the table, and J'onn introduced him, "This is my boyfriend."

Clark's head shot up, and Lois was looking at him intently. "What?! Gimme Gimme! Who is that guy!"

"Uh..." he started to chuckle a little bit. "Well, I think you're going to have to rethink your match-making abilities, because if I heard what I heard correctly, I'm pretty sure that is J'onn's boyfriend."

She furrowed her brow, "Really? Did you know?"

Clark shook his head and laughed, "I don't think anyone does."

"How does no one know this?! Maybe that's why he hasn't gone out on any dates!" she ranted. "Maybe after the death of his wife, he can't be with another woman, and he's too scared to ask anyone out!"

Clark shrugged, "He did really like Mamma Mia..."

Lois tried to fight back a laugh, "I guess that's what the whole _Manhunter_ thing was all about."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. It started out as a chapter to try and figure out who would be a good love interest for J'onn, and in the end, I found that he really doesn't have anyone over his whole history. With all of that in mind, I couldn't help going in this direction once that last line popped into my head, haha.

Plus with everything going on right now, it feels nice to have some diversity amongst the League. I know some people might not go for that kind of thing, but it's not like I'm planning on making anymore of this than this chapter, so try not to fly off the handle. All just in the spirit of fun, and I feel like it was at least tastefully done for everyone.

And just in case you missed it, the amazing LoisClarkNLove (Katlynne) co-wrote this with me! Show her some love! And shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought! Up next is the next part of the New Krypton arc!


	246. Zoners

**Review Comments:**

_**whynot1993**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! It was fun to write it, especially given the circumstances of it, but LoisClarkNLove really did the heavy lifting in the chapter! She had all the Lois stuff down pat!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - It was fun to write something a little more humor based for sure! And the whole thing with J'onn was a spur of the moment idea that I ran with, haha. And you'll get lots of Lois in this one!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - He deserved to get a little character development, haha. Katlynne wrote pretty much everything but the end, which I came up with on the fly and decided to run with it, haha. When it was announced that there would be a major gay character in the New 52, one of my first thoughts was J'onn because you've got Lois and Clark, Bruce and everyone, haha, Hal and Carol, Barry and Iris, Arthur and Mera, and J'onn just really never has had much of a love interest, so it was great to finally give him one, and I'm glad that everyone seemed to like it!

Alura's role is far from over in this one, and all things considered, you'd think she'd have to see the light, right? haha. Lex is in the very near future, so we'll just have to see what comes of it! haha.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - It was really fun to write! Katylnne did most of the heavy lifting though! There will always be someone to catch between Lois and her knack for being nosy and Clark's x-ray vision, haha.

_**Guest**_ - There will be a lot more once we finish New Krypton, it'll be nice to do more humor!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #246, Zoners

**Author's Note:** Alright, time for another slice of the New Krypton storyline!

* * *

"Where... the hell is my husband?!"

Hal rolled his eyes and sighed, "I told you! I left him on that planet thing!"

She huffed with a range, gripped his little green mask, and ripped it off his face. "Where is he now?!"

"Geeze, woman!" he cried. "That's an energy mask made out of willpower, how the hell did you even do that?!"

Lois clenched her jaw, "I guess I've just got more willpower than you do."

Hal touched his face, "Did you rip off my eyebrow? Where's my eyebrow?!"

"I think I've got something!" shouted Chloe from the Bat Cave's super computer. Bruce stood by, arms folded, sour look on his face. "Would you wipe that pout off your face? I'm trying to find our friend!"

Bruce muttered under his breath, "People aren't supposed to touch my stuff..."

She raced to the computer, "What do you have Chlo?"

"They look like..." Chloe tilted her head. "They're too small to be meteors..."

_**. . . . earlier . . . .**_

Clark floated in space. Pain rippled throughout his body. When the planet exploded, it sent chunks of New Krypton in every direction imaginable and every piece had just enough of a whiff of kryptonite to make every cell in his body scream. Bodies floated in space, some alive and some... _not_. He failed them all. Their nightmare was death at human hands.

If he would have had the energy, he would have growled Lex's name. But he was completely spent.

"Kal-El!" a voice raged.

There wasn't enough strength left to even turn his head. Luckily, or unluckily for Clark, two hands ripped him into position and revealed that Zod had survived. "You fool! You let this happen! Your love for the humans!"

"No..." he tried to speak.

"The BrainInterActive Construct filtered out my poisoning, Kal-El," he growled. "He has freed my brothers from the Phantom Zone as we always planned. With the Kandorians you didn't murder today, we will make sure that the humans suffer the same fate as our fallen brothers! As will you, Kal-El... You will die like your humans intended!"

Zod gripped Clark, and flung him towards the heart of the exploded New Krypton, where the kryptonite remained lingering the strongest. It would kill him. As weak as he was now, anymore exposure would be the death of him.

"So dies the House of El!" he bellowed. "And good riddance!"

He turned to the amassing army of Phantom Zoners and the Kandorians that had survived. "I told you that the humans are terrorists! I told you they would seek to destroy us! Let us return the favor!"

The cheer was unanimous. War was coming to Earth.

_**. . . . now . . . .**_

Her breaths were ragged. She tried to clear her mind. None of the thoughts that were racing through her head were going to do her any good. She had to stay focused. She had to do this for Jo'an. She had to do this for _Clark_.

"Hey!" she ripped around the corner, "Why don't you pick on someone your own size?!"

The two Zoners in the street turned her way. Lois fired her Gravity Gun, blowing one of them back. The other zoomed at her and Lois swung the Cosmic Staff to send him flying into the tank to her right.

"Thank my lucky stars they made Courtney room with a nosy roommate at Met-U and she left this beast," she exhaled.

J'onn J'onzz lent her the new Martian Crystal he built for trapping criminals in the Phantom Zone since way back when some axe wielding numbskull shattered his old one. Lois quickly dispatched them back to where they came from.

She pushed her ear piece to communicate with the team, "Two down, here. How are you guys doing?"

Across town, Bruce grunted as he slashed one of the Zoners with his gauntlets. "I've cut a few down to size, I think Green Arrow has one or two, he's trying to keep up with me. Our fair Princess is doing most of the heavy lifting."

He glanced over to see Diana dropped a semi-truck on some unsuspecting Zoners.

Lois nodded, "We have to take care of this on our own, we can't afford another kryptonite nuke hitting town."

"Easier said than done," Bruce snapped as he delivered an exploding batarang into the skull of another Zoner. "But we'll do what we can. Any word from the Boy Scout? We could really use the big guns..."

She tensed up, "Not yet..."

_**. . . . space . . . .**_

He closed his eyes, because he knew it was coming soon. It was only a matter of time before he saw the light. His father's voice would probably call out to him. He only hoped that the League was ready. For Jo'an. For _Lois_.

Clark could feel his arms spreading wide. He didn't know if it was his body giving in to the inevitable, or because the gravity that might still be present among the larger pieces of New Krypton. He could feel the radiation start to seep in, and he knew it wouldn't be long. A tear froze on his cheek, as he thought about his wife and daughter.

'_I'm so sorry, Lois..._' were what he expected to be his last thoughts.

But they wouldn't be.

"I've got you," a voice called, but it was almost like a whisper to Clark. It was familiar, but not at the same time.

He felt the hand grip his, pulling him from the debris and towards safety. Clark was barely able to open his eyes. His first thought was of Kara, that she managed to stay strong enough. She was always so strong. When he managed to crack his eyes open, he saw that it wasn't Kara, but a figure wearing some kind of metal suit.

When they came to a halt, he could see Kara, unconscious in the arms of another figure in a metal suit. It was red to his savior's blue. He tried to speak, but the red figure waved it's hand. "Rest... We are talking you home."

"You'll need it," the blue figure said. "We have a war to win."

_**. . . . metropolis . . . .**_

She raced up the stair well, trying to reach the roof of the Daily Planet. The Zoners had taken to the air with the incoming helicopter and jets the military sent. Lois burst through the door and started to scream after them.

"Zoners! Over here!" she shouted, catching the attention of some of the stragglers. "Do you guys have the whole drop-the-soap problem in there or what?! The Daily Planet wants to know!"

They zoomed towards her, and she over-estimated how many would come. There were at least seven.

Lois aimed her Gravity Gun and picked off one, sending him flying into a building. Her second shot clipped another Zoner that took out another as he fell. Still, they were coming close, and she didn't have enough time for the rest.

"If I gotta go out, I'm going to go out swinging," she muttered, gripping the Cosmic Staff.

She nailed the first one with a swing that would have made any of the sluggers on the Metropolis Monarchs jealous, and a quick turn-and-stab got her a second one, but there were still too many. "Crap."

"Get down!" a voice shouted.

Lois looked up to see two, well, '_what the hell? Robocops?_', metal-suited figures flying in. The blue one took out the Zoner that was about to grab Lois. The red one quickly dispatched of two others, before the blue one delivered a quick blow to the skull of the last one. Blue turned to Lois, "Are you ok? Did they hurt you?"

"Uh... No," Lois said awkwardly. "But umm, who the hell are you?"

They started to take off their helmets, and she could immediately see the blue one smirking, "Don't recognize me, Mom?"

"Oh... my god..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. I promised you that Lois was going to get some action! And she kicked as much butt as any of the heroes so far! haha. I'm excited to see what you guys thought, it was a lot of fun to write the butt kicking Lois Lane, and I'm excited about the cliff-hanger and your thoughts!

So shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought! We'll do another comedic chapter for next week, and I think I know which one it will be, but I won't say because I don't want to disappoint in case the muse doesn't wanna talk about that one quite yet, haha. But it will be something comedic before the big reveal in the next New Krypton chapter!


	247. February 29th

**Review Comments:**

_**Infinite Freedom**_ - Please don't kill me? hahaha. Not Sidekick part 2 yet, sorry! haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - She'll be getting to kick ass with Clark over in Flashpoint very shortly, haha, don't worry. And her part in New Krypton is far from over. I wouldn't be so sure that Jo'an was behind the mask though, haha. I will say that she and Conner will appear before the end though, but it makes me happy to be able to surprise you after 247 chapters, haha.

As enraged as Zod is, this was definitely the end game he had planned. Though I'm not sure he knows what he's gotten himself into. If there is one thing that might unite Clark and Lex, it's the fate of Earth. The announcment about the major gay character? It turned out to be Alan Scott, who is the Green Lantern of Earth-2. Not nearly as major of a character as I was expecting. I love Alan Scott, but he's not that big of a deal. I would have rathered it was J'onn.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Maybe! Have to stay tuned! haha.

_**Guest**_ - I'm glad that you liked it!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I really need to get Hal into more chapters, haha. I'm realizing how much I love writing him. It's definitely going to be someone huge! I promise that, haha. Kara is going to appear soon too! Stay tuned!

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #247, February 29th

**Author's Note: **Better late than never, right? haha. Hope you guys like it! Enjoy!

* * *

Lois grinned as she admired her handiwork.

It had been Clark's idea to make the Fortress more home-y. If you asked her, he was just jealous of how cool the BatCave is and wanted to one-up Bruce. She supposed it started with the armory. Clark had collected all the different kinds of kryptonite years before, but now there was an entire arsenal of weaponry he had to store away.

From LexCorp energy rifles to parademon canons to gravity guns, he even had a stray scarab from a run-in with the Reach a few years back. He always told her they needed them, '_for a rainy day,_' he'd say.

She'd definitely found the gravity gun handy from time to time.

Then he decided to make a zoo. She couldn't believe it when he brought home the first specimen. A t-rex from the center of the Earth. Like they were going to run Jurassic Park or something. Different critters spilled in from off-planet missions and whenever some villain used them like pawns in some evil scheme or something.

Deep down, she knew that Clark had a soft spot for them because most of them were the last of their kind. Like the Last Son of Krypton himself. He knew what it was like to be the last of his kind. Besides Kara. And kind of Conner. Plus Zod and the rest of the creeps in the Phantom Zone. '_I wonder if Clark ever checked up on that gas station guy again?_'

Not that she had time to worry about that. She had bigger fish to fry. This was a special day, and she was determined to make it as special as she could. It wasn't everyday you got to surprise Superman.

"And this just moves a little bit to the left like this," she murmured with her tongue sticking out just slightly.

She didn't even hear the touchdown behind her. "What are you up to, Miss Lane?" a voice chuckled.

Lois spun around, "Not today. It's _Mrs. Lane-Kent_, Mr. Kent."

"Uhuh," he grinned. "And what are you up to? Is that your favorite Whitesnake t-shirt pillow?"

Her eyes flashed with mischief, "And that's not all, watch this..." she walked out to the open, "Jor-El!"

An all too familiar voice boomed from above, "Yes, Lois..."

"Play my song, Frosty!" she bellowed with glee.

Clark watched on in confusion until, much to his surprise, music started to pump throughout the Fortress. His eyes grew big as his jaw dropped when he realized what was playing, through his father no less.

"Is that Whitesnake?!" he asked with a laugh.

Lois nodded wildly, "Do you hear the bass in this place? It's like we're front row center, Smallville!"

He shook his head with a laugh, "Lois, how is this even possible?"

"I had Cyborg swing by and hook me up," she shrugged. "He owed me after I promised to put in a good word for him with a little birdy he's had his eye on. Turns out the Fortress is compatible with the WayneTech phone, but no go on my Q-Pad."

Clark nodded with a laugh, "Ollie will will love that."

She quickly grabbed his hand and dragged him away, "That's not all I got done today."

Lois led him down one of the many caverns the Fortress now possessed. They stopped in front of a door and Lois quickly put in a code to gain entrance. Clark immediately noticed the code as she punched it in.

0-2-2-9

'_My birthday_,' he smiled to himself.

When they made it into the room, he was in shock. "Lois... This is..."

"I know it's not much, but ever since we let the lease run out on the apartment so we could move back to the Farm, we had all our junk in storage and I thought, where better to bring everything?" she ranted nervously.

Clark looked around the room and was immediately brought back to that apartment on Main in Metropolis.

Everything was exactly as it was. "Lois... This is amazing..." She beamed and grabbed his hand. It was like she went back in time, stole the apartment and carved a little corner for it in the Fortress.

"I wanted to do something special for your birthday," she smiled shyly.

"I love it."

She stepped up on the coffee table and kissed him on the nose. "I'm glad."

"How did you even get all of this done?" he laughed. "I was here just this morning."

Lois shrugged as she hopped down. "Bart and Kara helped me do the heavy lifting. I may have explained to them that the more time we spend in the Fortress, the more time they'll have for... _alone time_... at the Farm."

Clark frowned with a hint of a smile. "I'm not sure I'm ok with that."

"Oh really?" she smirked as she toyed with a new ring on her index finger. "Because Zatanna used her backwards mumbo-jumbo on this ring, and it keeps me warm no matter how cold the temperature might get, which of course means that when I'm up here in the freezing north, I can wear as much... or as _little_... as I like."

Her smirk only grew wider and wider as she saw his eyes get bigger and bigger. "They are grown up after all..."

Lois laughed, "They are."

The sounds of her laugh would echo through the caverns as he pulled her towards their home-away-from-home's bedroom in the Fortress of Solitude, though _that_ name might quite work anymore...

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I know I've referenced some of the additions to the Fortress to make it more like the one from the comics, so I wanted to explain how it came to be and I came up with this idea. I've always loved how Clark had all these little rooms and tributes to Krypton and various historical things.

They did a great job of showcasing it in the All-Star Superman movie if anyone wants to check it out, which was great, btw. I know some people think it's just an Arctic BatCave, but between the zoo and the monuments to his parents and the sun eater, I think the Fortress has a ton more personality than the BatCave. But I'm biased, haha.

Anyways, let me know what you thought! Shoot me some reviews! New Krypton is next!


	248. Nightwing

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas- El**_ - I've always kind of pictured it upgraded, so in some ways, I'm just explaining some of the additions I've described in the past like the armory or the kryptonite catalogue from the Silver-K or Black-K chapters. I definitely envision it with the big Jor-El and Lara statues, though there might be a better way to do them, like holograms or something. Actually, I just got a really great idea, haha. I'm definitely going to have to credit you for making me think about this, haha.

Krypto definitely has a special area, but Shelby has a bigger special area, hahaha.

_**Infinite Freedom**_ - Fair point, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - I definitely see him hallowing out some hallways and areas. All-Star Superman did a great job of showing the capacity of the Fortress if you haven't seen it. Of course, the Justice League animated show did a great job too. I'm definitely planning a whole Jor-El/Lois chapter, so you'll have to look out for that one, haha. You'll have to read on to find out who the mysterious savior was, and I'm thinking you're going to like it! haha.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - That's what it was in the comics, I didn't think to look up his Smallville birthday. Surprised? Is it because I've said that I'm not a very big Grant Morrison fan? I actually felt like the movie was better than his All-Star Superman run just because they cut out a lot of the usual Morrison runaway stuff. It's one of my favorites.

_**lalabear102**_ - Definitely in the works. She's one of my favorite characters from the comics!

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Not a problem at all, I know all too well how crazy real life gets. If I wasn't so far ahead with Flashpoint, I don't even want to think about how late I'd be all the time! haha. It is in the comics, but I guess I should have gone back to see where they had his birthday on Smallville. Actually, my cousin has the leap-year birthday too, so we just celebrate it on the 28th on years that we don't get the 29th to celebrate on. It's always a laugh, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #248, Nightwing

**Author's Note:** And here's the next part of the New Krypton storyline! Enjoy!

* * *

Hazy was the only way to describe it.

He could still feel the radiation ghosting through every cell. He couldn't stand. He couldn't talk. He couldn't even think. All he knew was the feel of the soft carpet beneath his back. He could feel it with his fingertips. He knew this carpet.

He was home.

"Smallville..." It sounded a million miles away. "Can you hear me?" But when that hand curled around his face, it was like the warmth spread from that very point and his body started to fight back. "Come back to me, Smallville..."

His fingers curled, a fist balled. He forced his body to fight back and expel the pain lingering in every tiny cell. Her sigh of relief gave him strength as she noticed how his breathing picked up. His eyelids weren't so heavy anymore, and he was finally able to lift them. Everything was still a blur, but he tried to blink clarity back into his vision.

Lois was the first face he recognized. So close, thumbing at his cheek. "There's my guy."

Behind her on the couch, he could make out Kara. She still looked worse for wear, but managed a small smile. Two figures stood just a further than his vision allowed. "Clark... Can you believe it? I still can't..."

He started to make out the red on one. Blue on the other.

They had familiar symbols emblazoned on their chests, old... but still familiar. The red one, was the Flamebird. The blue, was the Nightwing. Old Kryptonian symbols. How could they know them? Who were they?

"Who..."

The blue one leaned down next to Lois, and his boyish features were so familiar. "Mom didn't recognize me either."

Clark knew the laugh that fell from his mouth. "Chris?"

"Yeah," Chris smiled. "It's me, Dad."

The warmth erupted in his chest as he was able to sit up, and with strength that rivaled his strongest days, he lifted his arms and embraced Chris with everything he had. "Is it really you? Are you really back?"

Chris nodded, trying not to think about the tears soaking through onto his shoulder. "It's me. I'm sorry about the secrecy, I couldn't let him know that I was still alive. I didn't know how to get a message to you. I wanted to tell you guys, but I didn't know how without him finding out. We knew you'd need our help as soon as you showed up on New Krypton."

"You were there?" Clark almost whispered.

"I didn't go back to the Phantom Zone," he shook his head. "Thara saved me. She pulled me through the New Krypton side and took care of me. She had to use yellow sun energy to heal me, that's why I look older now."

Lois hugged him from behind, "We're going to have to beat off girls with a stick."

Behind them, Thara coughed a bit. They turned to look at her, then at Chris. "Uh... Yeah."

"I see..." Lois eyed the girl for a moment. "Well, we should get Smallville and Kara something to eat, and then you two can tell us all about it, especially what you've been up to with my son, what do you say, Thara?"

"Actually..." Clark started to stand. "I can't wait to feel better, I have to stop this. I have to see someone..."

Lois grabbed his arm roughly, "You're not going anywhere, Smallville. You were all but dead twenty minutes ago."

Clark gave her a stern look, "Every second I wait, more people will die. I have to stop him. The League need me."

"I just got my family back together, Clark!" Lois shouted. "I haven't even told Jo'an that Chris is back! You're not going to go running off to get yourself killed. You're in no shape to face Zod or his psycho prisoners!"

"That's why I'm going to go see an old friend," he told her firmly. "To get help from someone who hates kryptonians."

The doors to Lex Luthor's office swung open with a fury, not that it would alarm the man himself. Clark pushed through the entry way, clenching his ribs that still throbbed from the flight over to LexCorp.

"Lex!"

He greeted his nemesis in blue as cool as the other side of the pillow. "I've been expecting you. Thoughts?"

With a quick tug of a rope, a curtain fell around a statue that immediately glowed a bright green aura that brought Clark to his knees in an instant. Lex walked around his desk to admire his new statue of himself.

"I know it's quite handsome, but you don't have to bow before it, Clark," Lex mocked. "Then again, the weak tend to fall before the powerful. And to thing Otis thought it was a waste of time to set up the rope reveal. Seemed classy to me."

Clark trembled in agony, "Scared... of me... Lex...?"

"One can never be too careful, not with your alien friends roaming around making death threats. To be expected of course, I did just blow up their shiny new planet," Lex grinned. "You should have seen the president, he called for kryptonite like a boy trying to string garlic around his bedroom to ward of vampires. I really should have hung onto that job."

Gritting his teeth, Clark wasn't going to give up so easy. "I...never took...you for a..._Twilight_ fan..."

Lex jumped to his knees with an angry snarl, "Don't you dare compare the two! Dracula was cool. Twilight is... _sparkly_."

"There were innocent people on that planet, Lex..." Clark growled. "You're going to pay for that..."

He knelt over Clark, pushing his face around with his finger. "Still empty up here? Innocent? There was always going to be a war, Clark. Can't you see that? Or have you concocted some illusion of co-existence? Still naive, are we? They brought a big planet to take our place in the solar system. They didn't bunk with the Chocos freaks on Mars, did they? They didn't even settle for Pluto, which had to feel like home covered in ice. There was always going to be blood, Clark."

He couldn't get any words out, but the deep dark truth was that even if he could, he had nothing to argue with.

"It was _us_, or _them_. Unlike you, the decision to save Earth was any easy one," Lex put simply. "I'm _human_."

"Why do you think I'm here, Lex?" Clark grunted. "I'm here to save Earth."

Lex grinned, "Do tell."

He waved for a moment, the kryptonite made his head spin. "You've spent your whole life trying to kill me-"

"Clark! You shame me. I didn't start that until I was well into my 20's. I'd have killed you by now if I started that early."

"The point is..." Clark swallowed back some pain. "...Can I borrow some of your toys?"

Lex grinned like a fiend, "I'd be _delighted_."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? I'm sure that some of you are very happy to see the return of Christopher Kent after his disappearing act the last time Zod came to town! I know I was happy to finally bring him back, and I'm always happy to bring Lex and Clark onto the same side with Planet Earth at stake.

Anyways, shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought! The next chapter will be a comedic, family one!


	249. Statues

**Review Comments:**

_**Fat ppl are harder to kidnap**_ - Well, I did two chapters about the Fortune episode, #98 and #99 I think. And I've still got the second half of the Clark getting arrested story to do with Oliver from chapter #176. I'll keep that in the back of my head though, if the muse wants to talk it, I'll write it!

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - It's nice to have Chris back, I really like his character. And I'm excited to reveal how she saved him, what they've been up to, all that jazz. It's going to be pretty fun. And we'll get to have Lois be all crazy motherly, haha. Clark isn't planning to make anyone pay the ultimate price, so don't worry, haha. And Zod will get his own treatment. Alura still has a role to play, and I wouldn't count on Lex handing over toys and being done with this situation, but Clark knows that by now, I hope, haha. Lex and Clark have the same goal, but that doesn't mean they have the same plan.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm glad that I could surprise you! I have all the animated Superman stuff, actually, I have all the animated DC Comics stuff, haha. I love it all. I just watched Superman Unbound yesterday in fact. I'll definitely get around to more Ollie and Carter in the near future, when I'm done with New Krypton, there will be more humor based stuff.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - Doesn't he always? haha. Yeah, I read Superboy and that was definitely pretty weird, it's really complicated and all confusing because there is time travel and stuff. And as always, time isn't some straight line, it is more like a big ball of wibbily wobbly timey wimey...stuff, hahaha. I had to use one of my favorite Doctor Who lines, haha. I'm not sure how I feel about it because I'm not really sure how it's all going to play out, but I don't suppose it matters all that much to me. If there is anything to really feel about it, it seems to imply that Clois is a pretty certain outcome.

_**cartoonlover27**_ -I'm glad you liked it! And yeah, I've been at it for a while! haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12 and _**Jas-El**_ for inspiring this idea!

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, the Els

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #249, Statues

**Author's Note: **This idea comes from Jas-El causing this idea to pop into my head! Enjoy!

* * *

"Don't you get bored?"

Jor-El looked up from the crystal console, "Excuse me?"

She hopped down from the makeshift desk they had made her for her Kryptonian Studies. "You're always up here alone, you don't have anyone to talk to. Krypto doesn't exactly hold up his end of the conversation," Jo'an folded her arms.

Little Krypto's head shot up as he huffed.

"Your father visits, and your mother has been working on the adjustments to the Fortress," Jor-El explained.

"But Aunt Kara built her Sanctuary in the ocean, so she doesn't visit anymore either," she narrowed her eyes.

He gave her a smile. This little girl never gave up, never surrendered. He'd come to learn that since he began teaching her about the secrets of the universe. Since he'd created the hologram program that allowed her to see him instead of listening to a booming voice, she had been much more excited about her studies. Much more than Kal-El had been.

"You visit," he grinned.

Jo'an rolled her eyes, "We need to get you some friends, Grandpa."

"I can't leave the Fortress, Jo'an," he tried to explain. "My form can't exist without the power of the Fortress. I'm fine, I do not require friends. I am here to help the House of El continue to flourish."

She eyed him for a second. "No."

Jor-El duly noted the familiar tone in her voice. '_Exactly like her mother._'

Hours would pass before Lois and Clark returned to the Fortress. They usually enjoyed couple time while Jo'an worked on her studies, though it seemed like Lois preferred investigating leads and getting into trouble like the good ole days when she had Clark all to herself. Of course, it seemed like a lot of those leads ended in the loft like the _other_ kind of good ole days.

The ones without a child with super-hearing.

"It's kind of nice to show up without that voice booming over my head, you know?" Lois asked, her arm looped with Clark's as they walked into the Fortress. "Whenever I show up, he's always booming, but she gets her way with him. How is that?"

He tried not to smirk, "Stubborn like her mother."

Lois rolled her eyes and punched his arm, "If it's me, why can't I get him to stop booming?"

"Maybe you should ask him nicely?" Clark snickered. "And I don't mean the kind of nice when Jimmy brings doughnuts by your office first and you thank him before telling him now you don't have to cut him later."

"When he takes the doughnuts around the bullpen, and Lombard takes all the maples so I'll have to go see him, it really does makes me want to cut him, Smallville. I'm training him to behave properly," she wagged her head.

Jo'an patted the snow with her hands, stepping back to admire her work with a satisfied grin. "That's the ticket."

"What are you doing, Junior?"

She turned to see that her parents had joined her in the Fortress. Clark eyed his daughter's project for a second, there was something familiar about what stood before him. "Is this what I think it is?"

Jo'an nodded, "Grandpa is up here by himself all the time, and I wanted to give him a friend. Mom always missed you when you are gone on trips, so I thought I should give him Grandma to talk to."

Lois held her hand over her mouth and looked over the snow figure Jo'an had made, shocked at how sweet her little monster had just been. She hadn't thought about Jor-El had been alone for so long. Even if he claimed to be an emotionless A.I. and a literal ice-king, he had proven over the years that he cared very deeply for his son. He had proven he cared about all of them.

"That was very sweet of you," Clark smiled with tears in his eyes. "I'm sure your grandfather really appreciates this..."

"Smallville..." Lois whispered, grabbing his hand. "I think we should work on something a little more permanent."

_**. . . . later . . . .**_

He floated back, "Well? How does it look?"

Lois twisted her head back and forth, sticking out her thumb and eyeing his work. Kara rolled her eyes, "It looks great!"

"You sure?" he hollered from high above them.

Their sounds of approval told him it was ok to come down, so he floated back down to where the girls stood. Jo'an quickly took his head while Lois looped her arm in his. "This is so great, Smallville. It's perfect..."

Kara smiled, "They look exactly like them, Kal-El..."

They sighed and cast a look over the giant statues he had carved in the main hall of the Fortress. Building off Jo'an's idea to give Jor-El a friend, they had decided to erect statues of Jor-El and Lara of Krypton. Kara had helped to make sure to make them just right. They were like parents to her, and Zor-El certainly didn't help his cause in that department.

"You honor me," boomed Jor-El. "Thank you... All of you..."

Clark smiled as Lois cast an annoyed look overhead, "It was due time to pay tribute to two of the bravest people I've ever had the pleasure to know. And now you can see that you will never be alone, as Lara will always be beside you."

Lois threaded her hand into his and smiled at him, "As it should be."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Jas-El gave me this idea by mentioning the statues of Jor-El and Lara that usually reside in the Fortress of Solitude. I got this immediate picture of Jo'an making snow-men of Jor-El and Lara, which would be the inspiration for Clark to make the statues of them. But yeah, had the idea and ran with it.

Hopefully you guys liked it, and I'll be posting the next New Krypton bit ASAP to get caught back up. For those of you that didn't catch it in my authors note for the latest Flashpoint chapter, I had a crazy busy week and couldn't get any writing done, but I'll get caught up as soon as I can. Thanks as always for all of your patience!

**Next Up:** the next chapter of _New Krypton_.


	250. Mars

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - I'm glad that you approve of how it all came together. And you're dead on. Bruce has so much that connects himself with his past, but Clark really only has the Fortress, which is a far cry from actual possessions. I have thought about the Legion chapter and I'm currently sorting out a few different ideas for it, so I'm sure it'll be along soon.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - To be honest, I didn't even realize we were at #250, so I had to do some thinking for something special, and I hope you guys like what I came up with, haha. It's snuck up on me, which is crazy to think, since we're talking about my 250th chapter! I can't believe how fast the time has flown by, and that you've all stuck around with me!

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm glad that you liked it! I have quite a few Ollie/Carter ideas, but the trick is to flesh them out for a whole chapter, so I'm not sure how exactly they'll come together, but I'm sure there will be multiple chapters, haha.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Mhmm, Clark is quite the statue maker, haha. At one point or another, there has been a statue of almost every character involved with Superman. He's even had special rooms for Jimmy or Lois when they visit. I really wanted to do something special with Jo'an, and I felt like this was right up her alley, haha.

_**cartoonlover27**_ - You really don't have to read them in order, they're all mixed up, but they all exist in the same continuity and often tie into each other. I try to mention if they connect to other chapters in the author's note, but sometimes it gets forgotten. Beyond things getting revealed in later chapters, it shouldn't matter what order you read them in.

_**Fat ppl are harder to kidnap** _- Teenage Jo'an has come up quite a bit, the trick is, I always imagine her at the same age for some reason. It's one of the main reasons we haven't seen Baby #2 from the Easter chapters. I'm sure sooner or later, it'll happen, I just can't say for sure when that will be yet. No problem, I welcome requests, I just can't make promises because I don't know what the Muse will want to talk about each week. I write them all down though for future chapters.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois, Hal/Carol

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #250, Mars

**Author's Note: **This idea popped into my head the other night, and I just had to write a story about it, enjoy!

* * *

Lois landed with a thud.

"I don't care what Carol Ferris says," she growled at Hal. "This is not just like driving a car!"

He felt himself clench up in a way that only Lois Lane could make him clench up. "Noted. But you have to admit, having a Star Sapphire ring does have it's perks. You're just lucky Carol was on planet and not using hers."

"I don't understand how she got one these over your fling, but I didn't get picked with Smallville," she muttered.

They rushed over the ridge, trying to find their way down to where Clark's distress beacon was going off. He'd gone to Mars to help with J'onn J'onnzz with a new settlement dispute and J'onn lost him after the split up. The new martian colonies had formed from remnants of the White Martian clan, as well as some previously displaced Green Martians. The blood was still fresh for some of them, so disputes broke out from time to time and needing settling.

As they reached the peak, they saw Clark chained up to a post at the bottom of the hill. "Clark! We're coming!"

Lois slid down the hill to Clark, but he was smiling, which they found odd. "Lois, I'm ok, they saved me..."

They exchanged confused looks, "Who did?"

"Sorry!" a thin man shouted, sliding down the ridge in a fit of glee. "Sorry! Had to deal with the martians first, they do get a bit tetchy, don't they? Not to fret, I am coming, had to quell the violence first," he skidded to a stop. "Right, where were we?"

A Blonde and a Red-Head quickly followed him down the hill, which Hal took notice of quite quickly.

"Well, hello," he grinned at the Red-Head, whom rolled her eyes with a confident smile.

The thin man's eyebrow shot up, "You aren't a time agent in this universe, are you?"

Hal didn't even hear the question, he was too busy sizing up the tall Red-Head to his right.

Lois rolled her eyes and gave him a nudge, "You realize that Carol is going to kill you, right?"

"Yeah, but what does that have to do with this?" he grinned, not taking his eyes off the Red-Head. Lois shook her head and pushed past him, raising her ring up to the shackles at Clark's wrists to try and remove them.

"Hal!" she growled. "This stupid thing isn't working!"

Suddenly, a blue light flashed in front of her face. "Right! I'll take care of that," a voice chirped from behind her. Lois turned to see the thin man waving a some kind of metal tool over the chains. It hummed and glowed blue, and with a pop, he was free.

"Brilliant," the man grinned.

She twisted her brow for a moment, "And who are you?"

He rocked back and forth on his converse sneakers, "Me? Ah, well, I'm _the Doctor_."

"_Doctor_? Doctor _Who_?" With a nod, he simply grinned. "Where did you come from?"

"Just over there yonder and through the Void, rift in space and time, pesky Daleks are always stirring up a ruckus, aren't they? You could say it's in their programming," he smiled a goofy smile. "And seeing as how I recognize the lot of ya, I'm going to go ahead and guess I'm from a parallel universe where everything on the telly is real here and I s'ppose that means I might be on the telly here. Hmm, hope I'm as clever as I ought to be, and I really hope I'm as pretty as I ought to be."

The Blonde rolled her eyes, "Doctor..."

"What?!" he shouted. "It'd be a shame if I was a baby-faced bugger with a bow-tie."

An arm slapped him as the Red-Head glared, "Look here ya _mad man with a box_, bow-ties are cool."

"Blimey, she's a fiesty one, isn't she?" he grinned as he turned back to Lois and company. "Scottish and a ginger? Found her running around screaming about Weeping Angels, looking for the Doctor as if there were any other. I reckon you're from my future then? Bet you drive me around the bend and back, dontcha, Miss Pond?" he was really enjoying this far too much.

"It's about time you had someone to put you in your place," smirked the Blonde.

She nodded with a grin, "Wait until River has her way with you, then you can apologize, you fez wearing git."

"Ring, do you know what the hell they're talking about?" Hal asked with a frown. It was stumped.

The Red-Head smirked, "Oy, that's where I know you from, Rory's got you on his knickers. Little wee Green Lantern."

Hal turned to Lois with a confused look, mouthing "_Knickers?_"

"Well, I want to thank you, Doctor," Clark smiled. "I don't know what that little blue thing is or how you ended up here to save the day, but something tells me that you like to run around a bit and we won't be seeing you again."

The Doctor smiled ear-to-ear, "Smart one, this fella here, I like you already. And I do like your style, Mr. Superman. Even on Gallifrey we've got comics, my friend, and I know all about you. Last Son of Krypton and all, we'll just say it's a story I can relate to. Afraid not on the seeing again, not safe to travel between parallel universes and we've got to find the hole in the Void we came through and remind those Daleks who they're messing with."

"What is a Dalek?" Lois asked.

"Imagine R2-D2 on the steroids," the Red-Head grinned.

He shot his hand into the air, "And we've got to get you back to the Doctor you think you know, and I really don't need another lecture from this one's mum about missing supper, now do I?" he nudged the Blonde.

"You taking a dig at my mum?" the Blonde gave him a dirty look.

The Doctor froze for a moment, "To the Tardis! _Allons-y!_" He took off running. The Blonde snickered before running after him, chasing him towards a little blue box on the horizon. The Red Head rolled her eyes at their antics.

She shrugged, "I can see why he likes her so, she's about as mad as he is."

"Come along, Pond!" he shouted in the distance.

"Good day to ya," she said in her thick scottish accent, running after the Doctor and his Blonde companion.

Lois, Clark, and Hal simply watched them run off into the distance. None of them were quite sure what to make of what had just happened and honestly, they didn't really want the headache of trying to figure it out as the trio darted into the Police Box at the top of the ridge. "I don't know how they all fit, I hope it's _bigger on the inside_ than it looks," Lois muttered.

Suddenly they head a sound.

**VOORP, VOORP, VOORP, VOORP...**

And like that, the little blue Police Box was gone. And now, even more so than a moment ago, they weren't quite sure what to make of what had just happened, nor could they be bothered to even try to do so.

"Did that really just happen?" Lois mumbled with wide eyes.

Hal shook his head, "We probably should have given them an invite to the Justice League International, ya think?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? haha. #250 completely snuck up on me, so I wanted to do something special, and I thought what would be more special than twisting Smallville with my newest obsession, Doctor Who! I'm a huge fan of the Tenth Doctor, so I tried to make him come across as such but I also couldn't do this without my girl Amy Pond, so I had to come up with the time rift that would allow the two to meet somehow, someway.

Anyways, hope you guys enjoyed it, kind of in the vein of my Castle crossover, which people seemed to enjoy.

But since we're on this big moment, I really just want to take a second to thank all of you for sticking with me all this time and I really wouldn't be doing this without you. You guys have been so good to me, and I just hope that I've lived up to the task of giving you guys stories every week. You've really been the best, and I just wanted to thank you for being the best fans a guy could ask for. The length of this story is a testament to how great you all have been, so thank you.

**Next Up:** New Krypton continues!


	251. the Survivors

**Review Comments:**

_**Jas-El**_ - Ten is by far my favorite as well, though I have to admit, Eleven has grown on me, haha. That was Rose, haha. Amy has to be my favorite, which is why I had to come up with some crazy time rift to bring Ten and Amy together, haha. I might have to find a way to get Lois, Rose, and Amy plus River together in a chapter, the shenanigans they'd get into, haha.

_**Gabriella Jane London**_ - I'm aim to please, haha. I've just recently hopped on that bandwagon, a bit late to the party, I will admit. But I have loved running through the series and wouldn't be surprised if they pop-up again sometime, haha.

_**Fat ppl are harder to kidnap**_ - It is a bit confusing, you really just have to roll with it. I didn't particularly enjoy the first season with the Ninth Doctor, but when the Tenth Doctor shows up, it's just too much fun, haha. I do like Harry Potter, but I don't have a passion for it like some people seem to. I really loved the books, but I lost steam for the movies.

_**Craftygirl11**_ - I'm glad that you've liked them, I know that there are a ton of them, haha. Can be a bit intimidating for new readers, I'd expect, haha. When Lois is being her funny, kick ass self? I'm just swooning at the keyboard. Ollie and Carter are on the horizon, just recently got an idea for a chapter that flows out of another chapter I've got in the pipeline, so that should be fun. J'onn will still be spending the majority of time on Earth, but since he's more of a Leaguer and doesn't have an Earth life, he spends his free time on Mars. I will probably be doing a chapter to explain the Mars situation soon.

_**LoisNClark4Ever**_ - Oh, I think you'd love Doctor Who, haha. It's on NetFlix. I will say, I wasn't crazy about the first season with the Ninth Doctor (there have been eleven Doctors to date, but they're all technically the same person, just recast after he "regenerates"), but the Tenth Doctor and season two on is just a joy, haha. Hal has a crush on everyone I think, haha.

The Mars thing was kind of done on the fly, and I'll be doing a chapter to explain more what that was all about. It's not a big deal, just kind of "where did they come from?" and "what does that mean for J'onn now?" and stuff.

_**crazyhpcfan**_ - I'm glad you liked it!

_**cathy03**_ - And here you are on KMorKM! haha. I'm glad you liked the Fortress stuff, and of course Chris coming back! It's ok, I won't get into it all, just made for a kind of shocking ending since I didn't want to do the usual, "pairing within the League" bit because really, they meet other people, don't they? haha. I'm glad that you could enjoy the Doctor Who chapter, I tried to make it accessible for folks that haven't watched it, but at the same time, I couldn't help but go for some references, haha.

**Author:** CaptainTightPants12

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Clois

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Smallville or it's characters, I wouldn't have stopped at ten seasons and this would be saved for an eleventh season.

**Summary:** A series of 'Kill me or Kiss Me?' moments.

**Chapter:** #251, the Survivors

**Author's Note: **Alrighty, here's the next part of New Krypton! Almost done! I promise! haha.

* * *

"Those... Apes!" she shrieked.

Kara turned to see that Alura had come to, staggering to her feet. "Mother!"

A snarl twisted on her face, "I will _end_ them for this, Kara..." Her daughter twisted her brow in confusion. "Your uncle was _obsessed_ with these primitive beings. He thought that they were capable of greatness _we_ had achieved, but I see now that the humans are just _poorer_, _lesser_ versions of us... And they will pay for their treachery!"

"What?" Kara shook her head. "You can't be serious, Mother... Zod-"

"Has _protected_ our people!" Alura screamed. "Since the arrival of your cousin, they have treated us like a _threat_, did you not expect him to respond in kind, Kara?! They have destroyed New Krypton! Our people are _dead_!"

Some of the fellow survivors began to cheer quietly behind her. When Kara woke, she led them to safe place outside the city to recover until Clark figure out what to do next. She slowly looked around at them, slowly beating that war drum Clark had warned her about. "_One_ man, Mother... Not the people of Earth. One _man_ did this..."

"I will have his head," Alura growled. "And then the rest. They took _our_ home. We will take _theirs_!"

"No! This is _not_ how we do things here! Lex Luthor _will_ stand trial, he _will_ be punished!" she shouted, trying to silence the chants growing around them. "We are better than this, Mother! _You_ are better than this!"

Alura fixed a glare on her daughter. "That is precisely _why_ they must go."

Kara returned her glare in turn, "You were attacked by Brainiac! You, of all people, should understand _why_ this is wrong! Do you want to destroy their home like Brainiac destroyed ours?! This is not the way to do this!"

"You have been _poisoned_ by the thoughts of these apes, Kara..." Alura cooed. "You do not see the threat that they pose to us and our survival. We can make this planet our home. We can rebuild Krypton here..."

"_This_ is my home, Mother..." Kara shook her head. "I love this planet, and it's people. I won't let you."

She frowned, "My poor daughter... Your foolish uncle spoke of _love_, he tried to sway the Science Council many times with it, but it has been proven time and time again, what _you_ call love is simply a _chemical reaction_ in the brain generated by external stimuli. Your place is with your people, Kara... Not with them. You belong at _my_ side."

"If you plan to wipe out an entire race, I _can't_ stand at your side, Mother," Kara cried. "Nor will Kal-El."

Alura frowned, "Then we will _kill_ Kal-El, and then these people when they are _defenseless_."

"They _won't_ be defenseless."

They turned and looked to the sky, seeing what every kryptonian recognized as a Green Lantern, accompanied by a warrior woman and a crimson man. The trio floated down to the ground behind Kara, serious looks on their faces.

"I'm sorry, but get out of the way, kid," Hal whispered. "We've heard _enough_."

Kara turned and shook her head, "No... I can _fix_ this... Let me fix this!"

Diana shot Kara a sympathetic look, she knew all too well the perils of a power-hungry mother. "You know why we can't do that, Kara. If you mean to wage _war_..." she clenched her fists. "...then war you shall have."

"Barry..." Kara whispered.

He shook his head at his technically grand-daughter-in-law with a pained expression on his face, "I'm sorry, Supergirl... But we have a _responsibility_ to protect Earth, no matter _who_ threatens it."

"You see, Daughter?" Alura snarled. "They will _always_ threaten us! Even you! They would kill _you_, their _friend_, to protect the apes. I should have expected as much from a Green Lantern. They've always been judge, jury, and executioner."

"That's kind of _rich_ coming from you, Blondie," Hal glared.

Kara cried, "Mother... Let's _leave_. Let's find a _new_ planet. We can leave this place, and be _safe_ forever. Please..."

It was as much of a plea for the safety of her mother and what was left of their people, as it was for the task for the Justice League had sent. Five survivors, plus Alura. They were outnumbered, even if Kara sided with the League.

"I am sorry, Daughter..." Alura whispered. "_Attack_!"

The battle was swift, at least that's how it appeared to Hal. He was the only one without super-speed. But still, it was quick all the same. Between Diana's training and Barry's speed, they were able to dispose of two of the survivors rather quickly. Hal quickly surrounded them with the construct of a jail cell, just in time to see a fist flying his way.

Kara screamed for her mother to stop, but she advanced on Hal all the same.

She didn't know what to do, as she couldn't attack her fellow League members, but how was she supposed to attack her own mother either? Diana used her lasso to drop a second kryptonian, no match for her without the proper training. Barry quickly phased through another kryptonian, creating a cyclone with his arms that delivered the kryptonian into the fist of Diana.

"Very nice, Flash," she grinned, causing the scarlet speeder's face to match his outfit.

Hal dodged Alura's blows, trying not to break concentration as the two kryptonians began to beat against their cell. "Look, I don't want to hit Superman's auntie-poo, but I will knock you into the next sector if you force me," he grunted.

"Green Lanterns have _always_ been inferior to the kryptonians, that's why you feared us!"

A large green hand exploded from Hal's ring, pushing Alura back, "Hold up, what?"

She charged again, "Your Guardians always _clashed_ against the Science Guild!"

"They're annoying little _smurfs_, what do you expect?" he quipped as he dropped another cell onto the two captive kryptonians Diana and Barry had just dispatched of, causing him to lose focus even more and take a blow to the face from Alura.

He fell to the ground with a thud, just barely holding onto his constructs. "Now I _end_ you!"

She raised her fist to deliver a final blow to Hal, but a hand grabbed her by the wrist and jerked her around. "I am sorry for this, Mother... But you gave me _no_ choice," Kara cried. She ramped up her super-speed to knock Alura to the ground.

He quickly brought together the seperate cells to create one large one to encompass the six kryptonians.

"Hits like a _girl_," he quipped to Diana as he moved his jaw around, she simply rolled her eyes.

Kara closed her eyes as he mother screeched, "You betray _me_?! You betray _Krypton_?! You _shame_ me, Daughter!"

Hal shook his head as Alura bashed against the emerald prison bars he created for her. "I would have thought _more_ from the family of someone like Superman. You lost your world, and now you're trying to make someone else suffer the same fate. If you would have looked around, you would have seen what this world is _capable_ of."

She glared at him, "I have _seen_ what these people are capable of..."

"Have you?" he asked with a chuckle. "I'm a Green Lantern, and I'm _not_ the only one. Your nephew is an _alien_. We've got a friend from _Mars_, even a _douche_ from the future with an affinity for _gold_. This is our _home_. Sure, some don't want us here, I know that. But the rest make up the many. And they've welcomed us with _open_ arms."

Diana nodded, "You could have had a place here. Kal-El does. Your daughter does. Did they not have the same kind of people on Krypton? Were there not heroes and villains? I _know_ that there were. I've met some of _both_ sides."

"If you're supposed to be the all-knowing superior beings of Krypton? I'm _not_ impressed," Hal added bluntly. "Kind of makes it a little _heartwarming_ to know the best parts of Superman, were from _Earth_."

Alura rested her head against the bars, "I just wanted for my people to have a _home_... To _survive_."

Barry stepped forward and placed his hand on hers, "If that's true? Help _us_. Zod will kill _every_ last person on this planet if he can, but _you_ can take away his army. They _will_ listen to you. You can help us save _so_ many innocent lives. And I promise, we will help find a _new_ home. Superman did it once, and I promise you, we _will_ do it again."

She looked up at him, and first time, she looked on a human with hope.

"Mother... _Please_..." Kara pleaded. "They _will_ help you. _I_ will help you. No one else has to die today."

Alura looked at her daughter for a good long while, but she had already made up her mind. She knew what had to be done, for the survival of her people. "There is a _Phantom Zone Projector_ among the remains of New Krypton, we must find it..."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, what did you think? Alura certainly had a roller coaster of emotions this chapter, didn't she? haha. I didn't want to give her a straight forward heroes tale anything because lets face it, a person in her position would have to be seeing things the way she was. Dare I say, it's human nature, haha. But it looks like she's on the Good Team now, or is she just playing them all? haha. Only the next installment will tell! haha.

Anyways, shoot me some reviews and let me know what you thought! The next chapter is going to be a non-New Krypton humor chapter, as always. Not sure which one quite yet, there are a few in the mix right now!


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